The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Has Dan Ever Had Pizza?

Episode Date: February 10, 2026

"My wife always handles the wand." After the Heat's loss to the Jazz, a team that is purposefully trying to lose to a point that Zas has threatened to send their coach to prison, we're talkin' boy bands, pizza crust, and the Marlins bringing back teal as p's and c's report to Spring Training. Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Jonathan 'Phony Bologna' Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I don't know what's about to happen today, Dan, but what I do know is Chris is walking around in the room over there before the show starts talking about what a big fraud I am. And I don't know what that's about. Who's he telling that to? Who's he telling that? Fonny Baloney, I believe I said as well. Wow. Like, what are you talking about? Whoa, which is worse?

Put it on the poll at Levitard show. Big fraud or phony baloney? You know, you got something to say when you say it. I want to save it. No, I guess now we're here, though. Just mumbling phony. I heard there were cuck two out there somewhere? No.

I heard it. Dan, weeks ago, months ago at this point, Zaslo made fun of me for going to Vegas to see the Backstreet Boys. That's right. He went to Backstreet Boys and he took his wife all the way to Vegas for Backstreet Boys. Remember what he said he's going to Vegas this weekend? I'm going tomorrow night. You know what he's doing there?

No. New kids on the block. What? Fony baloney. He has a friend on the band. Yeah, but it's the same thing. You can't make... Same exactly.

You can't make... It is the same thing. It is the same thing. It's a worst thing. That backfeed boys are better. You know what, Jeremy's got this right, actually. Not surprisingly. He knows the nuance between the boy bands.

Of course I do. And he's right. You're going to a rip-off version of that. Are you going to the... Yeah, right. New kids were first. They were first, but worse. Don't sell them short. There's a possibility here that he hits up his friend

and new kids for tickets to BSB at the sphere, too. Oh, yeah. I'm definitely not going to see Backstreet Boys at the sphere. I don't believe you. Everybody knows I cannot go to the sphere because I have vertigo. and I would get very sick during the show. So I cannot go to the sphere, all right? So don't even worry about that.

Everybody knows that. The sphere is dangerous for you? Yeah, because the visuals and the spinning. Can you put me there? Like, what happens? You walk in and you're like, ah! Well, I mean, I would just be in the middle of the show and I'd probably start puke.

It'd be bad. Are you the person that those warnings on the, you know, on Netflix or the streamers where they say strobing lights? Where I have, like, epilepsy? Well, I'm just hearing that mean, I've never known. I don't know anybody who those warnings are for. I don't know anybody when they put this has smoking and also strobe lights that make people dizzy. I've never met anyone.

It's for people of epilepsy. Yeah. Different things. Epilepsy and Vertigo. Yeah. That's why they're called different things. Thank you. But you're saying that the sphere and the strobing lights are affecting your vertigo.

I'm not making a big leap there. No, because it'll be motion sickness. See, this is scaring me because I'm going to the sphere for the first time the following weekend, like whatever the 20th or 21st, whenever that is. And I've never been before. My wife has been before, but I've never been. And now you're scaring me a little bit. Who you want to see?

Whoever's playing the next weekend? You don't even know? I think it's the Eagles, but I'm not sure. She told me. Don Henley said, this might be the last year that you can see the Eagles. Oh, please. That's why we're doing it. But my friend is in New Kids on the block.

I'm going to see my friend perform. Who are you friends with him back? You're a phony baloney. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I don't want it. He doesn't remember who he's going to see. Wild.

I think it's the Eagles. There can't be many people going to the sphere in a couple of weeks who don't know who they're going to see. I like the idea that he's on the plane for the six-hour flight and they're like, what are you going to do in Vegas? I don't know. Well, at some point I'll come up on the flight. You know, a couple of cocktails in. I'll ask her, who we're seeing, by the way? Eagles?

Yeah, that's what I thought. But it could be somebody else. I agreed to it, so it must be somebody I want to see. I hope it's backstry. No, it's not a boy band. it's an old man band We had the We had the closed

When he said boy band Oh okay This is the Dan Levatore show With the Stucats podcast Bryce Senseaba Mike Beaumonti's got to go about better than this

Like that's as bad That is as bad a loss As I've ever seen them have last night I'm not even kidding Even though they were only a five and a half point favorite in that game That Bamada bio quote, coming out of that mouth when that team's not good enough and he's the guy you need to beat Utah at home when Utah's trying to lose. You guys saw the Bamada bio quote, right?

I mean, I just, I've never seen that come out of a heat mouth before where he's saying, we've got to find a way to win against the teams that are, I guess you can say, trying to lose. Utah benched its players in the fourth quarter. They just lost this way at Orlando. And when Ethan Skolnik asks Utah's coach, Will, whatever his name is, when they ask him, hey, how tempted were you to put in marketing it in the fourth quarter? Wasn't going to. Had no intention.

Zaz accused people yesterday of point shaving and said they should be put in prison because of what Utah is doing. They tried to do it. And the heat wouldn't allow them to murder themselves. me look like a sucker last night. Like a cuck. Phony Bloney. No, no. Yes. No.

Admit it. So we'll get to the phony baloney controversy here because Zaslo is going to see a boy band in Vegas. I don't know if you guys have seen like Vegas is really hurting. This shouldn't surprise people given what's going on in the economy, but the Mirage is closed.

Rio is about to close. A bunch of places are about to close because Vegas is really hurting. I'm about to give it a boost. Zaz and Cody are headed the next couple of weeks to give it a boost. Zaz to see new kids on the block and Cody to see old men on the block and he's not sure though. He thinks it's the Eagles, but he's not totally positive. Yeah, whoever's playing that weekend I'm seeing.

I have here, Cody, I'm doing a little bit of Dan Lebitard finds out here. I have a video that you don't know that we have and I want an explanation for what it is that happened here in this video during your Super Bowl party. We are about to miss kickoff. There's over there. Greg, Greg, you're going to there.

Michael! Greg, touch the remote, and now we're going to miss kickoff. My wife's panicking. Another crisis solved.

Another crisis solved. Nobody left. The top 10 on the catchphrase count. Another crisis solved. I want to wipe that camera that great. A little plug for the countdown.

He's like, will that be on Greg Cody's catchphrases? And mixing water. Why does that living room look jaundiced? that living room looks like out of 1970s Jacksonville. Is it the pain on the wall?

It's not the camera. Why is it a bad shot? Well, what happened? First of all, what happened? Because you said, look, and my wife, panicking, as you're standing nearby, doing nothing. All you've done is harm and then took credit and turned and swung and did a promo. The best television I've seen since Tony marveled at Jason Garrett turning to a camera with one gleaming tooth and smiling at a camera. I'm telling you, this is seconds before kickoff, and he touches the remote,

and all of a sudden we can't get it off the screen, and my mom, my brother have to come running in. Well, I normally don't touch a remote. Right, and you did it right before halftime. The only reason I did it was the volume thing. We had it at like 99 or 100. It was like blaring, and I was about to make an announcement to hold the commercials sacrosanct and shut up when the commercials come on. That did nothing because I didn't hear a single commercial at your house.

That's a good announcement, though. It's important. Yeah, it is a moment. He did it during a commercial, by the way, that announcement. You know, you got to do it sometime. Zaz, why are you looking at Cody this way? I just, I don't, why don't you know how to use the equipment in your home? My wife always handles the wand.

The wand. Whoa, that's a T-shirt. Valentine's Day is coming up. We have a resident love expert, Greg Cody, and we have an assortment of questions for him. My wife always handles the wand. See what you did, Zaz? That's on you, by the way. It is. It is. You're a phony baloney. It's been proven.

I don't know why I'm a phony baloney. Tony, would you like to explain to him how it is and why it is that he's a phony baloney? You made fun of Chris for doing something. Now, you're going to do the same thing, but older and worse, making you a phony baloney. I'm going to the original. I'm going to the OG, new kids on the block, all right? There would not even be a backstreet boys, or in sync for that matter, if there wasn't a new kids on the block. So let's make sure we get that straight, all right? And number

two and more importantly, one of the guys in the group is my friend. I'm going to see my friend perform. A friend? Oh, yeah. By the way, huge fan of this show. Watches every day. Watches every day. If he watches every day and he sees Zaz on the show, they'll become friends inside of that. No, we are friends. We've been friends for over like 10 plus years. Is he going to bring you on stage? No, no, but we'll be sitting right next to stage. Do you any invite to his birthday party?

Not a friend. I don't think so. Is that the rule? How are you guys doing this? Like, he's old, birthday party. He's a new, he's a new kid on the block. I'm just saying he must have had a 50th recently, a 40th. So, but is that the way you're doing friendship?

Did they invite you? I have a 50th birthday party. I don't invite you. You're not my friend. Like, right? I mean, like, I put it on the poll at Lebitard show. If you're, if you're not invited to that guy's 50-year-old birthday party, are you his friend? Go ahead.

Who would answer yes to that? So I want to get to this heat story because, and there is, I believe, a tournament team in town. The University of Miami plays a giant game the biggest of the year tonight at home against North Carolina. North Carolina is a big letdown spot for North Carolina. This is exactly where you want to play them where they just won a buzzer-beater against Duke and they've had two cordstormings and now they're going on the- They embarrass themselves with two court-stormings? Yeah. Violence ensued.

Caleb Wilson is a problem. I don't believe the Miami Hurricanes have a player as good as he is. That's no slight on the Miami Hurricanes. He's one of the best players in the country. And that's a giant game. The student section is going to be full tonight. They're honoring the U.M. football team as well. So it'll be the best crowd of the season as well.

The best crowd these players have ever played in front of, correct? Like, best home crowd. It's a whole new team, whole new staff. There isn't a holdover from last year. So yeah, definitely. And it's at finally a convenient time. These game times have been weird. You know, putting Cal and Stanford in the ACC is really mucked things up.

What time is tonight? Tonight's 7 o'clock tip. It's better than the 9 o'clock weeknight tip that we had against Stanford. That point guard's very good, by the way. So they lose at Cal the day I said they were a tournament team. They lost as an 11.5 point favorite. Beat BC haven't played a whole lot of good teams. Mike's still questioning whether they're a tournament team,

and Joe Lennardi is saying they're a 10 season. They're one of the, they've got the kind of record you want to have, but now begins the difficult part of the schedule and when you're going to test yourself against the boozers or Camboozer, I guess, because his brother's not playing as much. Yeah, he's not that good. Yeah, but Cam is amazing. Yes, Cam, Cam is amazing. Yeah, if Miami wins this game, they are pretty entrenched unless they fall off like this, this last quarter of the season. This is a tough 10 days they've got. This is the toughest stretch of their schedule with opponents and everyone else.

they're going to be a tournament team, it will reveal itself right now. True Henderson's coming back tonight. Great defender. This is the type of team that you don't want to face when you have the emotional highs, the court storming against your biggest rival in Duke. You hop on a plane a couple days later and you play a tough as nails defensive team. The type of team that Jay Lucas has built down here is not fun to play on any night, especially when you're kind of feeling yourself. So a big festive crowd is what it is that's being expected tonight there. It would be the opposite of what I imagine was at that heat game last night because can you guys tell me how many road wins Utah has? I know Sacramento had three, Washington had five and these teams just can't win on the road.

These terrible, these truly terrible teams can't win on the road. And the circumstances that you had last night is Utah, the stat from Amin is amazing. Okay. Three years ago, worst defense in league history. topped two years ago by them having the worst defense in league history topped this year by this being the worst defensive team in the league.

Last night was their seventh road win. They sit their starters. They sit their starters in the fourth quarter. Their coach is not trying to win. Like they're actively, they are, Sacramento and Washington are trying. Like they're trying to win.

Utah's not trying to win. They're the only team in the league, the only one that you could point to and say they're doing this. They're in the fourth quarter. When they have a lead, they sit their best guy. Yeah, that was obvious tanking. Now, Bam didn't use the word tanking. He said trying to lose. Same thing. What interests me about that is that that's usually unspoken among players. Players very rarely say tanking out loud. That's a media thing.

But coaches and players hardly say it. That's an Adam Silver problem, though, because when you do what they did in the fourth quarter, it's so blatant. It's so blatant. So blatant. He'll fix it. He'll get to the bottom of it. Sowing needle. Would you rather be Utah or Miami? amazing. That's starting five, I mean, if they're fully healthy, the jazz starting five is no, next year they've got so many picks. You see, Utah had a vision and they stuck to it. Yep, lose for a decade. And now they're well positioned. I cannot imagine. Just like the current NBA champion, how did they get good? By being terrible for a really long time. Miani just held still. You're going to have so much fun with that. What happened after, I don't even know how you show your face around here, given what we've seen out of

Jack's shit over there. The Super Bowl, I don't know what you're talking about. The Super Bowl men, we didn't sees, bro. The Super Bowl meant we didn't didn't even have to talk about the Miami Heat blown a 20-point lead against Boston. Here's the thing, though. They've lost, they've blown 32 double-digit leads since the last, you know, since the last season, and it's the most in the sport. Is there any reporting being done about Norman Powell and the personal issues? Because while I respect all of this, he had a child. No, he came back though, and then he got hurt. He's had back tightness for a couple of weeks here. He needs the All-Star break. He hurt his hand. I would. be shocked if he also missed Wednesday's game. He might play because they'd like to end the first

half on a good note. But he was out yesterday because it's the second night of back-to-back's three out of the four last night. All right. So Norm Powell is out. Tyler Hero is out. Oh, Hero's out. You're going to have trouble with size. Like, that's what happened. You had trouble with size, Kalil Weir had to play a bunch. And they don't want to play him a bunch. And he had to play a bunch. and they had a size advantage where Spoh's like, I don't know what to do with their size advantage. Like, you know,

I've seen Mark in the 3, he's seven feet tall. You understand, though, that Spow, like, doesn't usually go, yeah. Yeah. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. February can make it seem like everyone else has their love life figured out. Whether that's perfect dates, long-term partnerships,

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Don Lebertard. Is there back in my day? There is, actually. Are you not going to tell anyone? Wait a minute. You guys. It's a Tuesday. It's a Tuesday.

Stugats. Here's your guy. Greg Cody with Back in My Day. I hope I have. Okay, here it is. Sorry. Adultery. Oh!

Yeah. We are back. We're waiting for this one. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. The reason that Zaz will not get any traction on wanting to ditch jail everyone in the Utah organization for point shaving is because the players they do play are trying to win. Bryce Sensible is trying to win. Do you or do you not have to do better for Mike Biamonte? He's gone from.

Luw al-Dang to Bryce Sensible. That's just, yeah, that's not, that's not the way for him to retire. No. Lou old dang is perfect. You don't get any better than that. Lou old dang. You know, like John Conchar? They told Barry Jackson that they felt like they had a team that could make some noise in the playoffs.

Fart noise. Everybody thought so the first month of the season. They were like the darling in the league. Oh, Jeremy was excited. There's 14 and 17. points a game. You know, the Marlin signed Chris Paddock to a one-year, four-million dollar deal yesterday.

He's basically their Cal-Control of this year. He's there to eat up innings. He'll compete for a rotation spot. But Braxton, Garrett and Max Meyer both back. Your hat's patronizing. I mean, after that heat game last night, you come in here wearing the old school Marlins hat. Look at me.

I put on a Miami heat jacket here. Represent. I mean, the Marlins, it's P's and Cs today. And they have the Tile uniforms coming back. That's why you wear the old school marlins. They have a teal uniforms. You know, they've never worn those two uniforms? You know, they never worn TIL uniforms in a game before, only in spring training and batting practice.

So these two uniforms, it's a debut. How about that? Well, wait a minute. No, that was what it. Nope. Never worn that jersey in a regular season game ever in the history of the franchise. Those uniforms are the ones that I thought they played with in 1993. Mandela effect.

No. Batting practice and spring training. Yeah, I think those are spring training jerseys. Well, the crowds that will show up to see those new uniforms, the crowds that will show, they're going to fill that stadium. because of the uniform gimmick. I got excited there because that dugout in that photo is clearly the old pro player stadium dugout. They clearly just recreated it, but I would love them to turn their current dugout because that old, it just brings me, I would love to go back to pro player stadium.

They're doing good things with the brand here. Man, I miss that stadium. That just brings me back to my high school years. I know, it was empty. Trust me. I know, it was sad. Nobody says that. I'm telling you, but you bring it back to my junior year.

David Sampson got every game. David Sampson built that stadium. on Caya Ocho as a modern new stadium. It stinks. It's a bad ballpark. I snuck in a 12 pack of long neck beers into Joe Robbie for a Marlins

game one time. Fish tank seats. I got caught. The Peanuts. Cody's crew. The Peanuts guy with the glasses on. The public's power alley? I wore long cargo pants,

so it had lots of pockets. And I put like several long necks in each pockets. I'm like waddling into the stadium when I get my ticket, you know. don't want them to clank or break in my pockets. We made it to our seats. We made it to our seats with the 12 pack of beers.

Take them all out. We're drinking. We're drinking. By like the third inning, the usher comes down. Notices we're drinking longnecks, all right? They don't sell long necks. As a criminal, that's a pretty amateur move. You are looking pretty good with the cargo pants.

And you got through because all of security is bored there because they got seven people coming through. So security's not paying attention. Well, when we used to sit in a section. where there was never an usher either. You were about to save $100. All you had to do was be a less sloppy criminal. You can't drink a beer that's clearly not sold there. We're pound and longnecks, which they very obviously do not sell at the stadium.

She comes and she confiscates it from me. Why wouldn't you just buy a couple of cups? And she's like, you know, is this it? Like, no, we got more. And then I reached under the seat and she's now walking up the stairs holding like six beers. Everyone was laughing. What a waste of being. What a ballpark.

Left field scoreboard. I can't believe what you guys are saying right now out loud to an audience that's listening. I said it the very first game at that monstrosity in Little Havana. It's a bad ballpark. It's never been good. It made me miss a football stadium without a roof at the time. Nobody liked that place because of the rainouts. So you'd have five-hour games.

The rainouts were great. You'd just go into the concourse. It was so hot. But, man, it felt like baseball. That was, that's an essential. nostalgia. That's what's missing, and I'm glad that they're bringing back the teal uniforms because there is zero connection to whatever team that ballpark houses. They have totally different uniforms. They don't let any players stick around long enough for you to actually grow

attached to them. The only connection point that Marlins fans have to that team, they don't even have the same name. Would you be in favor of them changing it back to Florida Marlins? Yes, I'd be make them teal, make them the Florida Marlins. Let me, get some kind of nostalgia connection to this team. And it does feel different when I see them wearing that. I'm like, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. I don't have any kind of connection to the new stuff. There is a reason why they have specifically Marlins on the front there and not Miami.

And it is to tie it back to the nostalgia that you're used to of seeing Marlins. And that's been the name the whole way through, whether it's Florida Marlins, whether it's Miami Marlins. They're the Marlins franchise. And bringing back the Teal, they are trying to sort of harken back to their history. They had the Marlins Legends Hall of Fame open last year. This year it's detraining Beckett being added. It's a great crowd to honor Leland last year. Remember it was about 100 people in this?

See, this is the problem with the Marlins, though. They're using the past as a crutch. The dolphins do the same thing a little bit. Miami supports winners. If you're the Marlins, the teal uniforms are nice. They're going to please a lot of kids who go to the game, maybe. No, it's pleasing our age. It's pleasing the people who buy tickets.

Guys, eye on the ball, okay? You let Jeremy do what you didn't. want to let him do. He went to Marlins and you stayed here because he hypnotized you with the, with the throwback uniform. Eye on the ball, okay? It's opening weekend at Marklight Stadium this weekend. In summary, the Marlins use a crutch of the past instead of spending money now to create a winning team. What do the Yankees do, Greg?

Did they sign anybody big this season or are they relying on a team that has a one-of-a-world series since 2009? The Yankees win. The Canes win what? Point and a half favorite tonight against North. Carolina. And it's the crowd. I didn't understand what was happening with the point spread last night in Utah and the heat, right? Everything I just told you. Historically bad defensive team, not trying, not playing at starters late. Like that combination of things, you ought to score 140

points on that team. Like, that's what should happen. And the points sprint kept dropping. It was Utah underdog by seven, six, five and a half. And I'm like, what do they know? who knows what here about Utah's size advantage. Wasn't Utah also on a back-to-back? Didn't they just do this the previous night in Orlando? It was Saturday night. It was Saturday night. And the heat were on a back-to-back, and they had no Norman Powell or Pella Larson,

which meant they started Davion Mitchell alongside Simone Fontechio. Jeremy, they played the Wizards. Myron Gardner. That was an A.U. That was an A.A.U.T. I told my son to lay the six and a half. My fault. The canes are a one-and-half point dog, not in a one-and-a-f favorite. Yeah, that's a... That's basically a pick-em.

Let's go. Cocaine's. The canes are more desperate. Haven't they lost like three out of five? I mean, they're struggling to make the big tournament. They have not, no, wait a minute. They're not struggling. Aren't they 19, what are they, 195?

I guess like dating back to the FSU loss, this is their worst stretch. It's weird. Yeah, they lost two out of five. Yeah, they'll go up to Syracuse, win that game, then struggle against Cal. Carmelow's kid doesn't play defense either. No. The Stanford game was a range.

Random Rock fight. They're not playing in these games the way that you would think a 10 seed would play. Much like the heat, their best form was at the start of the season. Win this game tonight for the Keynes, though, and like all that conversation goes away. Huge for your season. Huge for your program. Well, you announce yourself, right? Because people, they got some recruits in 10, too. They were before losing to FSU, they got ranked. Did they not? Did they not end up? Right there. Okay. Like Brandon Marshall was right there? They were right there, but they weren't quite ranked. That was a crime because when they were like, I think 15, yeah. Like point shaving? Like Utah needs to be in prison for a crime? At one point that Keynes were like 15 and two,

their only two losses were to top 10 teams and yet they weren't ranked. I thought they should have been ranked then. Now they wouldn't be ranked now because they're on a little bit of a skid. Yeah, but you know, compared to college football, like the rankings obviously in season means something in college football. It really doesn't mean anything in college basketball. Like just keep winning games. Oh, but no, what it does sort of mean, though, is when your name is in there,

and then you win a game like Tonight's, right? Tonight's is the one everyone's going to be watching. North Carolina brings that with them. North Carolina coming off of, hey, so John Shire, again, Duke's lying. Duke, there was no staffer punch in the court storm. This is the second time. Duke claims that their people are punched and injured during stuff, and there's never any video, even though every kid in the, in Cameron Indoor has a,

or actually it's not camera and indoor. Every kid has a camera and there's no video of this? Yeah, the story changed too. We stopped being punched in the face. Then we got trampled. There's no video of a trampling either. Aren't we still waiting for a video of Kyle Filipowski getting hit as well? He played last night.

Didn't they say he hurt his leg or something? That the court storming injured his leg. Yeah, yeah. There was actually like at least a video of that one. Beginning to think Duke exaggerates when they lose these games to North Carolina. Also, John Shire, beta. Don Lebertard.

I want to address Tony and all men who would wear that shirt in public. Stugats. Don't do it. This is the Don't Lebatar show with the Stugats. While we're talking college basketball, can we talk about Syracuse basketball player Donnie Freeman, uncrusting and uncrustable? This is just monster behavior. This is triggering.

It doesn't have a crust. And he's peeling the crust off of it. And it's just, I needed, I need an explanation. Because that little crust part of the uncrustable is delicious. You're not, okay, you need an explanation. Well, do you understand people who pull the crust off their, off their pizza? Yeah, but yes, but there's a crust to be pulled. Here, there is no crust to be.

Dad, have you ever seen it on a second for? Yes. The whole thing is up there. They don't have a crust. No, I have not. I actually like the little pinched part of the uncrustable. It's like my favorite part of the uncrustable. And you're choosing to take the delightful part of the uncrustable.

and just turn it into a PB&J. Hold on a second. Dan, you know people who, I know people who don't eat the crust on pizza. You know people who pull off the crust on the pizza? The top of the crust, that they don't like the thick, the bretti crust that doesn't have the cheese on it, not the entirety of the crust. Right, but they pull it off and then they just like hold the other part and eat the other part? That's barbaric. You've never seen a pizza box filled with crust because people do that?

They eat it after. Right. They eat a whole pizza and then you leave it. And then you leave the crust. A good piece of pizza. ganging up on us. This is our experience. Put it on the poll at Lebitard

show. Do you trust people? Or how should I phrase this? Because you're saying people don't do it. And I'm saying I do know people who do not eat the top end of crust of pizza. No, that's not what you said, though. That's how you said. Do they rip it off before they eat the regular slice? They're attacking us. That's crazy behavior. You have serial killer friends.

Yeah, I've never seen that in my life. You're telling me there are people who have a slice of pizza and before they take a bite, they rip off the crust? Yes, guys. Again, what do you mean? You're saying no, but you're talking about the piece of the pizza that doesn't have cheese. They don't want just bread. They want.

That's right. But Dan, like 99% of what people do is you have a slice. You're holding the crust. You eat the crust, the pizza up until the crust. You need it to hold the slice. Most people just don't eat the crust. I haven't seen a lot of people before the slices eaten. Dan, as friends who rip it off.

Stand your ground. This is. This is ridiculous. And so then they're just holding with the cheese and the sauce in their fingers. Only crazy people. Cereal killers. Yeah. I ate the crust last.

Switching gears. What do you mean Denny Hamlin? Daytona. I'm asking you to make that my voice and don't try and sneak in your things in my subconscious, your topics. I don't want to talk about Denny Hamlin anymore. It makes me sad. Got them off the cross thing. At Lebitard show, do you trust people who.

do not eat. What is that called? Because the whole thing is the crust, right? Is it not the whole is the whole... Have you ever eaten pizza in your life? All right. I'm on their side. What is the base? What is... This is sovereign even for you. What is the base of the pizza called? It's called the undercarriage. Oh, the undercarriage. Nobody calls it that.

No, you need a good undercarriage. When you look at a pie, you're like, how's the undercarriage. That's not also the crust. It technically is. No, undercarriage has been baked dough. That's what a pizza bottom is. But nobody calls it the... No, it has been. Dave Porterton. Post-Nois popularized the term undercarriage. You lift it up, what's the undercarriage? Dave Portnoy's popularized the term undercarriage.

Say what you want about him. He's seen a pizza before. Are you trying to deny pizza? Are you trying to deny Dave Portnoy's monopoly over pizza reviews? Are you trying to deny him that? Look, you can deny him plenty. He's on the pizza game. I'm not denying that.

One bite. I am denying that he's popular. I put it on the poll at Levitard show. Has Dave Portnoy. made you call the bottom half of a pizza, the undercarriage. Just put it up that way, because you guys are saying he's popularized it. I didn't know that it was called the undercarriage. I don't know what to call it.

Have you ever had pizza before? I can't believe you know people, or at least you're claiming to know people, who rip off the crust of a slice of pizza. Why would I be asking myself, have I ever had pizza before? Because, man, I'm confused on this one. Then speak in your normal voice and stop speaking in that one. As my inner monologue, I need you to stay in. Character. If you're going to attack my vulnerabilities from in there, stop being yourself and stay in character.

They're holding the cheese and the tomato sauce with their fingers? It's impossible almost to rip off the crust. You almost have to cut it with scissors or use a knife because the crust is attached to the rest of the pie. Then he called under the pizza crust, just a rough look. Speaking to the mic. Speak into the mic, Roy, is asking you to speak into the mic. I'm right here. I'm here. The mic's here. Are you guys worried? I don't know if you're made sad.

Obviously, Vegas is something that is almost always exciting as you're taking off for Vegas, and then there's great regret on your flight home, especially if it's a red eye. But I did not know until recently that the Mirage, one of the giants out there, is done. The Rio is smaller, off the strip, done. There are problems in Vegas now because it's being affected, obviously, by a lack of disqualification. disposable income in the economy in ways that are startling and you guys are headed there, you're headed there for a romantic weekend. This is you.

Phony Maloney. This is you being romantic, taking your wife of how many years? Oh, boy. Quicker than that. Oh, no. Why can I think about it for a second? Oh, my God, Tamara. I'm not allowed to think of it for a second.

This year will be 19. I can't think about it. Do some quick math? K-saving a beaut. Oh, my God. Why does everything have to be a tip my tongue? Did you just say the tip of my tongue? Tava a tongue.

I like that character better. That character needs to speak more. The other one needs to speak less. How do you know the parlor doesn't sell them? The tip of your tongue is what you were saying. Yeah. You don't have to have everything on the tip of your tongue, but this is you're meant to do a romantic weekend.

That's what you're aspiring to do. We're going to Valentine's, new kids on the block. My wife's never been to Vegas. It's all going to be very exciting. Cody, want to quiz you. What is Zaz saying here? How do you know the parlor isn't seldom? How do you know the parlor isn't seldom?

The end is where you got trae? How do you know the parlor isn't seldom? That's what it sounds like to me. The end of that is so much clearer than the beginning of that. Say it one more time. I got the heart part right. I don't know. How's you got the part right?

That's not decipherable. How do you know the parlor isn't seldom? This is good attack. I heard seldom. This was in reference yesterday to Jordan Hudson, Bill Belchake's girlfriend, wearing the shirt that she wore to North Carolina Duke that makes fun of Bob Kraft and the name of the salon that he was caught, sex trafficking. And so it wouldn't be the parlor seldoming them. It would be, how do you know the parlor doesn't sell them? How do you know the parlor doesn't sell them?

Yeah, now that you say it, I can hear. But the how do you is the hardest part for us. All right, so finally, I'm going to surprise all you guys, Cody, most of all right now, because we were making fun of how do you not remember Bill Poli and whether you voted for Bill Belichick or not? And I was making the argument. Well, in your 80s, that's something that you can be forgetful about. And then we did a failed quiz with Greg Cody where he voted for his Hall of Famers.

And he's had trouble with his memory just today, right? Because he didn't remember that he's going to see the Eagles in Vegas. His wife told him, but he doesn't remember who he's seeing. So Greg Cody, you're scared of what I'm about to do right now, right? Who did you vote for the Hall of Fame two weeks ago when we did that quiz with you here? Do you remember who you voted for? Because you voted for four people, and that laughter suggests that he's cornered. Yeah, I'm stalling right now.

Do you remember which sport you voted on? Well, I'm a baseball Hall of Fame voter. I would remember whether or not I voted for a specific player, which is why when you ask some... Did you vote for Belichick or not? Who'd you vote for? Who'd you vote for? Ask me if I voted for a specific player. That's the issue here.

You can't get one of them? Because Tony Dungey was asked if he voted for Belichick and he refused to answer. If you asked me whether I voted for Jack Flackman for the Hall of Fame, I'll tell you whether or not I did. Greg. I will take a quiz. Greg, you're trapped, right? You cannot remember a... You voted two weeks ago for four people.

We did a big show of it public. It was actually about, it was just before Christmas. It was probably seven or eight weeks ago that I actually voted. No, but I'm not asking you who you voted on your actual ballot. I'm asking you for who you voted on in that quiz we had you take two weeks ago. We handed you the ballot, you don't remember either of them? Wait a minute, you don't remember either of them? You don't remember who you voted for for the actual Hall of Fame, and you don't also remember in the quiz.

You tell me a player, I'll tell you if I voted for it. Not how this works. A hundred percent. Greg. Greg. And I will guarantee you. my answer. Greg, do you remember playing this game with us two weeks ago? Okay, I voted for Andrew Jones. Yes. In December, you voted for Andrew Jones. We had you take a

hypothetical test that wasn't actually an accurate appraisal. With football, Greg. It was a football Hall of Fame. It wasn't a baseball hall of fame. Do you not even remember that we had you vote for the football one? Oh, that thing. Oh, my God. This is unbelievable. You ripped Bill Polian. You said Bill Pollian, and I was like 81 years old. That's tough to remember stuff. was asked, did you vote for whoever, Belichick? So you think you'd get it right if I gave you? Guys, give me, please, because I don't remember, but please give me who the names were that we put in front of him

because he only selected four of them, and I'm going to ask him right now. I'll ask him. Okay, Larry Fitzgerald, Drew Breeze, those were the two obvious ones, and then there were two borderline guys. I don't think I voted for Adam Vinicherry, even though he made the hall.

And I did not vote for Roger Craig, and he made the hall. I'm not actually even sure you're doing this correctly. We'll get an accurate appraisal of this in a second. Are any of you put it on the poll, please, Judge? You're at Levitard show. Do you live in a sane world when Luke Keekley gets in faster than Bill Belichick? Embarrassing. What's going on behind the scenes with this stuff?

This is so dumb. There's so many puppet strings being pulled and no one wants to come out and say like, no, I'm the person behind this. Go ahead, Mike. Those are two bona fide Hall of Famers. Kraft has been on the ballot for like 14 years. I don't know how much better of an owner you have to be in that sport. What Mark's success, what your team's value is and how many championships he've won. He's been in the conversation my entire adult life.

I don't understand how he's not a Hall of Fame owner. If an owner can make the Hall of Fame, it looks like Robert Kraft. And head coach, forget it. It's a greatest head coach of our lives. Mike, to be honest, it's making me not even care about the Hall of Fame anymore. It's a joke, you're right. It's a dog and pony show. It's like, oh, is he going to get in?

No, okay, whatever. It doesn't really matter. Like, he's obviously the greatest coach of all time. It doesn't really, I don't really care about it anymore. What's with this? Like, I didn't vote for him because I thought he was going to get in. Vote for the people that deserve to go in. Don't be like that other person's got it.

This is the most ridiculous. It makes the entire thing look like a joke. Greg, I have the full list of names that were available to you to vote for. Hold on to that for a second. Tony, you, a dog and pony show, you have referenced a great many times. There's been a lot of them. I still don't have an answer for when the dog and pony show went out of business, because I don't think that that's a business.

It hasn't gone out of business. Clearly, with Janus and with this whole Hall of Fame thing, a lot of dog and pony shows all over the place. There has to be an extinction date on the dog and pony show because I don't, there are no traveling. There are no traveling circuses anymore. We will get to that list in a second. I have in front of me the four people that you voted for,

but I'd like, Jeremy, tell me privately so that I can quiz him on this because I'd like to play this game with him to see if he can actually remember who it is. I already said two of them. You did say two of them, but you can't remember the other two. And I want to see if I can get you with any of the others that. I don't know why you would be this confident. Like, I don't know why you would lean in your chair that way, if you've got this.

Well, you didn't even remember the sport we were talking about. You didn't remember the quiz. You didn't remember much of anything. It's not about remembering. It's about, I thought we were talking about baseball.

Breeze and Fitzgerald were the two automatic picks. The others were controversial. I didn't, I don't think I voted for Luke Keekely, to be honest with it. All right. Forgive me here because I'm delayed in this. Zaslow, you owe $50, okay?

And Money Lion has brought back the fine bucket. our thanks to Money Lion, banking, lending, investment, help yourself to Money Lion because they are now sponsoring the fine bucket. And Zazlo got hit with the biggest fine that there is $50 because he killed David Baker, the retired Hall of Fame inductor who wanders the earth. No, not RIP. He's still alive. He's not dead.

You guys didn't even know who he was. I should get credit for knowing who he is. This is a master class from us. I do know who he is. he is. I do know who David Baker is and you owe $50 because you killed him. You said he was dead and he's not dead. Where do I got to give the money? I got to get an actual physical fine bucket now. You got is that a hundred behind your ear? Yes, this is where I keep my money. I keep it in my ear. No one's thinking about the pizza anymore. Hey everybody. It's Mike Ryan. Now, if you've been following the show,

you know I've been traveling, been super busy, been supporting my favorite football team with mixed results, right? Not the greatest hang so far in 2026. I try to find every excuse in the book. I had one buddy that was trying to invite me out. I wanted to stay in. He's like, come on, let's watch this NBA game. So I go over to his house. I watched this NBA game and guess what? Something amazing happened. He pulled out the Miller lights. And I knew right away, I made the right call. Next thing you know, we're toasting, we're celebrating, we're having a great time. We're talking about nostalgia. We're talking about old friends that we had. And it was all the time. We're talking about old friends that we had. And it was all thanks to Miller Light, that icebreaker.

Because when you actually say yes and you actually show up, you want a beer that fits the moment. For me, that's Miller Light. Legendary moments. Start with Miller Light. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller Lite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.

Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories, and 3.2 carbs. 12 ounces.