The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Miami Is Finland?

Episode Date: January 19, 2026

"I always know porn when I see it. I've NEVER been confused." A 'forever night' for Miami is on the horizon and Mike simply does not care what anyone else thinks. He's so locked in for tonight's game that he's leaving early for reasons no one on the show can actually understand. IT'S NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP GAME DAY, BABY. Today's cast: Dan, Zaslow, Chris, Dave Dameshek, Jeremy, Lucy, and Mike. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Folks, I'm getting hungry, and you know my favorite part of any meal, snack, or game day app? That's right. The goat, or should I say the greatest of all time? Frank's Red Hot! It's got the perfect blend of flavor and heat that elevates all foods from wings to Buffalo chicken dip to even ice cream. That's right, I said ice cream. And with a roster of flavors from OG to sweet chili, you can put that shit on everything.

So make every dish the greatest and eat the goat. You know how during the introductions, boxers hop back and forth from foot to foot to sort of stay warm. Mike Ryan's been doing that all morning. And I think it's just because he's so polluted that he's trying to get all the liquor out from this weekend. I don't think he's going to make it to tonight. I think he's going to get there crawling. Lucy might be hurting too. But that might just be because she's back in Miami and doesn't like being here.

No comment. Mike, what was your weekend like? Fantastic, damn. It's been great. Playing host, college football world here. I just hope they take it easy on us. It's, you know, greatest seem of all time. You know, I said a lot of prayers last night, hoping that we can just stay in this.

You know, make it a four-quarter game. I just saw on my TV screen on Get Up. I saw the question. It was on the graphic. Does home field advantage matter for Miami? What kind of question is that? Like, what kind of question is that? Do they have home field advantage?

Everyone's staying in this hotel right now is an Indiana fan. Yeah, you know what? And I can tell because they keep trying to have conversations with me in the elevator. It's a reason for that. Yeah, it's kind of crazy that I haven't seen a single Miami fan staying at this hotel. But there have been Indiana fans at every bar we've gone to. All the events has been, I think it's going to be more even than it's, like, obviously portrayed with it being an actual home game for Miami. I think they're actually going to be shocked at how not home gamey this is going to feel for Indiana.

They thought that they were going to fly into this town because no one on my plane is a Miami fan is crazy. And they're going to be hitting the mouth by not just the football team, but by the crowd. I don't think it's going to be a home game for Indiana, but I also don't think it's going to be like 70, 30 Miami. All right, I just don't care what anybody thinks. Well, that's not new. I don't feel like you have the right attitude today. We need to put positive energy out. Dave Damashek called me Finland.

He called me Finland. Why did he call you Finland? That's how America regards the U right now. I'm not saying that that's what I think. I am trying to personify the thoughts of most of football America in advance of this big game. You know we have five of these? We have five of these.

I think it's terrific and I'm happy for you, but let's harken back to... All right, I don't care. They don't care. I'm not harkening back to that first one where you began in the orange bowl against a team number one in the nation with the Heisman trophy winner in tow wearing red and white as they paid visit to Miami. All right. I like harkening so far. Right?

And Bernie Kosar did it. Our guy kind of looks like Bernie Kosar. We have Jesus on our side as we've already established. We have Fernando established. We have 10,000 Jesuses on our side. They're all going to be in the sand. I got to say, I've seen what the lebitard social handles have been doing there, and quite frankly, I think it stacks up to sacrilegious.

We already have said what's... I know that Carson Beck likes to go double crosses on the cheeks. It's a little obsequious, in my opinion. But either way, what was it like, Dan? Were you physically in attendance at the Orange Bowl back in 1983, on January 2nd, 1984? How am I already tired of him talking? Get out of town!

Fake break room show Bro, we only got 30 more minutes Fake break in a show They don't got the energy we got, bro They don't want it how we want them, oh For your madre Biggest game in 20 years Oh

Cookies, cookies Some boys that work how we work They ain't feel how we feel They ain't cry how we cry, yeah Well Guess what we're doing the party? We're doing it at Bird Bowl Let's go! Here we'll move,

to get a bit of the Cuban are you. Do what now? How Cuban are you? Oghai. Fist alcohol and baby powder the same thing? Yes, you doofus. All right. What kind of Cuban are you?

Smart money's right here. Put your life savings, your kings. Oh, yeah, the hurricanes. Stop being a homo, bro. I love you, my honest. Billy Corbyn. Fake break in a show.

I'm not totally sure, but I think Zaz is guilty of cultural appropriable. creation. I also think that's allowed just tonight for these 12 hours. Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day. Zaslo says that tonight can be a forever night, but there's only one result that produces that as a forever night here, right?

Like it could also be a forever night for Indiana, right? Nah, no one will remember that. I don't think you have that accurate. We've got our biases here. If anyone's just listening to this show, they don't understand how Miami is. between a seven and a half point or an eight and a half point underdog. Does that line feel right to you, Lucy? Does it feel right to you, given that Miami doesn't get blown out?

And I wouldn't give them a touchdown against anybody in the country. They were a nine and a half point dog against Ohio State, and we saw how that went. I would say that it felt right originally in the aftermath of what Indiana did to Oregon, because that was such a beat down and Indiana looked so dominant. Obviously, the line has dropped. I think that's an appropriate reaction because, like, it is. is in Miami's home stadium. Like, this is, I think it's going to be closer than people realize,

but I also understand that if you have just, most people are just watching Indiana football for the first time ever. The first time they saw Indiana play was against Alabama. Including Indiana fans. And so you're most likely looking at those two results and saying, this is the best football team I've ever seen in my life, where Miami has had, you know, looked great in the playoffs, but they're not playing games like that.

So I think it's just sort of an overreaction without the context of what Indiana has looked like this whole year where people are talking about them and something we sort of talked about before the show of like the greatest team ever. If you watch them this season, they had a lot of close games that could have gone another way. One of them you were at, I think, at Iowa. Were you not at that one? We did not go to that one, but that one was their, their closest if my sweet Mark Rannowski had not gotten hurt. Indiana would have a loss. That hurt a lot. We played a lot better than them, but it's cool. I've gotten over it. It's fine. How shook is Indiana going to be when the Keynes go up 14-0?

That's how you have this going. Indiana's president, Pamela Witten, has said, not shocked or surprised by this season. Come on, lady. Like, come on, lady. Like, what are you doing? How can you say that? Lucy, what do you shrugging your shoulders about?

You can't say that if you're the president of Indiana? You can't think it if you're the president of Indiana. She said she's not shocked. Not shocked or surprised. It was the goal, that the goal was to win the championship. But it makes me think the president of Indiana doesn't know anything. about football. They did make into the playoff last year and they only lost

two games last season. So I don't actually think that's that ridiculous of a statement because that going into this season, the big narrative for Indiana was, was it a fluke or was it truly something that's sustainable? They were 100 to 1 betting on. 100 to 1. Yeah, it's one of those

things where Indiana is so historically bad at football that like you need more than a one year sample size to buy in and they've proven that. So I actually don't think that's that ridiculous of a statement. If she had said this last year, I'd be like, girl, you are out of your mind. That is insane. But the fact that they went to the playoff last year, they were a very good team last year.

Yeah, I don't think it's so ridiculous to say. I'm not shocked that they took a step up. It's more than a step up. You know who else was a basketball school? The United States of America going to the Olympics in advance of the 1980 winter games. And then they vanquished the mighty Soviet Union. And then there was a little bit of hash to be settled on the other side of that. and they were called Finland.

That's what Miami is. The basketball school that is Indiana University is now the feel-good story of these United States, all of Football America, save perhaps Florida, Gator, alum, Zaz, and some of his pals down here in South Beach are rooting for the team wearing orange. Otherwise, you are Finland to the rest of football America. You are in the way of the final chapter of the feel-good story

that is the Indiana. Hoosiers, led by Fernando Mendoza, and Coach Sig, from Pittsburgh, PA. I like how Dave thinks I have friends in South Beach. What, I, that's my crew. That's how much the rest of football America knows between South Beach and, and, and all the rest of this vast way and call Miami. Do you have any theories as to why it is that Mike has to leave today's show early for a game that's at 7.30 p.m. tonight.

Lucy's going as well. Well, and Mike's the only one that has to leave early. Mike's leaving like five minutes. Yes. Why? It's a Keynes thing. You just don't understand. That's not true.

Like, that's not true. You want to say in a Faye. I'm not doing this with you today, all right? Especially while I'm decked out in Keynes gear. Dan didn't recognize me when he got here this morning because I'm wearing a bandana. I thought it was Luther Campbell. I thought he got here early. He didn't recognize me.

But I'm not doing this with you today. All right. Today, it's all about the you. I'm all about the canes. Am I going to wear this? While I'm on the air at ESPN today at 3 p.m. Maybe you'll find out. Actually, I wait to see.

I don't think you will. I don't think you're brave enough to do it. You don't think I got the guts? No, you're saying it's all about the you with Mike. It's always about the me, as you know, so he's leaving. Well, I don't understand. The gates open at, what, 11? You chew on that line over the weekend, boss?

No, I just thought of it now. I was sober all weekend. Unlike you, who was polluting himself all parts all over. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you were sober. All over. Well, not any woman on South Beach was. They had a free Calvin Harris concert. They should never do those for free.

That should never be something that you do for free because there were just bodies stacked on top of bodies, all of them holding each other by the hair throwing up in the street. We break into free events around here. Yeah, we find a way. You guys feel it all over town, correct? You feel that this thing is here because I was thinking, The Panther thing was obviously and is obviously enormous, but I don't know that it saturates both counties or all three counties the way that this does because it's so generational.

And it also crosses across cultures because of what a God football is in this country. I mean, this is why this is why I said like, and I'm not joking. This is this has a chance to be a forever night. I'm so excited for my city and for my friends. and for everyone who has waited so long for this. And you're right. Like, it could be a forever night no matter what, but I'll give a shit about Indiana, all right?

It's a forever night for us here in Miami. So it's super exciting to wake up this morning knowing this could be one of the best night of your life. That's what you have now. It's a great day. I do think it's bigger for Indiana because they've never done anything like this before. Okay.

I'm glad we talked about this. I'd like to say, I think it's a cagey move by Zaz to do the Luther Campbell cosplay because if he stripped that away, he would represent what Miami is again to Football America. Lex Luther, that's what you are to the vast majority of college football fans right now. You are the villain in the way of the nice hero story. You think that that's somehow a put down. Miami wants to be the villain.

Miami, this goes across all of our sports. Miami loves being the villain. See, now we're in our wheel. You just put us in our wheelhouse, Dave. That backfire. You think you've heard the darkness as your friend. Zaz has already exposed born into it. You were trying to make a fun point here.

That backfired on you. Congratulations. Lucy, what do you have planned today? Because our people, we've got a ton of people in town. They're going to be working all day to day. We're going to be doing a live watch party throughout the game tonight at 7.30 p.m. do you have planned, Lucy? And again, I want an answer to my question as to why it is. Mike has to be out there and has to leave the show early while Zadzlowe and Lucy, who as far as I can tell, are

going to be doing work for media establishments over the next few hours are not leaving early. In Mike's defense, my schedule right now has a lot of three hours for me to get to the game. I'm very nervous about traffic. I'm very nervous about a certain individual deciding to make an appearance at this game. So we've played. I don't know who it is. Not somebody's name. Michael Irvin? Yes, it was him.

That's exactly it. But so we've allotted a lot of time in traffic. We're going to get there early. We're going to catch the vibe. And maybe I'll talk to you on the live show, but maybe not. I don't want to make any promises. He must be a pretty big diehard for the canes because he not only is wearing orange. He is orange.

He got his ass. So Damashek is going to be on the live stream as the voice of Indiana, the lonely voice of Indiana. There's going to be another Indiana voice. my dad. Your dad's been invited now? Your dad has accepted the invitation. Yeah, because he's like, where should I go watch the game, son? I'm like, I don't know, bar.

He texted me the other day. He's like, hey, where can I buy UM stuff? You know, do you think they'll have UM stuff at Dix? I'm like, yeah. And then he's like, they didn't have any Indiana stuff because he wants to buy both. Because, you know, like he'll root for my, he'll be happy, Chris Ball and the fact that his son obviously has like, basically one passion in life and it's the Miami Hurricanes, but he's a Mendoza guy.

You'll find out together. Also, you guys watch him. I'm not dealing with those texts. The guy wants to try to talk ball to me. I'm like, shut up. We could just have him call Mike throughout the game. It'll be fun. It's going to be nice at night's end. You guys are all going to say, like, it's cool to see the local Cuban guy holding the national championship giant joint. That's a nice consolation prize. Hey listeners, I don't know about you, but at the start of the new year, I always want to make sure I have my finances in order. And it really does feel like Chime is changing the way people bank. This is fee-free, smarter banking built for you.

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Smyranoff. No purchase necessary must be legal U.S. resident 21 or older. Sweepstakes starts 1215, 2025 at 12 a.m. Eastern, and ends 123, 23, 2026 at 11.59. P.m. Eastern. See official rules at program website. Don Lebertard. Mike Ryan's in there, and he's the one with a baby. He's

the one who's got to, like, worry about what the future is. And Mike Ryan bet on draft kings because Mike Ryan bet on us. This is the bet you're afraid of doubling down on. Putting up a billboard in Edmonton. Stugats. I care more about Matthew Kachuk than I do my daughter. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats.

I have seen the old retro U.M. jackets all over town because it's an unusually cold day around here. That is not a normal thing in South Florida. It is everywhere this weekend where the retro. The Luther Campbell video, the Luther Campbell video jackets that two live crew was making videos with when they were celebrating the University of Miami and bringing Miami to the world. We've got Tony out in the field again today and he's going to be live tonight. This part's going to be crazy. A dead flamingo. That's going to be nuts over there. That's nuts under normal circumstances. That's nuts on the weekend around small sporting events. I can't even imagine what it's going to be tonight.

So Tony, give us the report on what it is you're going to be doing out there tonight. It's basically, I feel like everybody who's going to be watching the live stream tonight is only going to be watching to see us crestfallen. I think the best result for the people viewing is us being sad because they're annoyed by the show we've been doing for the last week and the last 20 years. Hello, Daniel, Jonathan, everybody who's there at the studio, Glad to be reporting today from Cairo. Yes, we're in front of Dead Flamingo.

And I don't know if you understand this, Dan. Yes, the people want to see everybody crestfallen. They want to see the show in tears. But everywhere you step today in Miami is a war zone. Every single step. Anybody that's walking around understands what we're under right now. Okay, we are under threat of the entire nation laughing at us. We were under threat of losing the biggest game in the 2000s.

There's nothing bigger than what we are right now. Mike Ryan, I'm glad to see you there. I'm excited to see you at the national championship. I will not be there, but you'll be boots on the ground. We're in the middle of a war, Dan, and you're laughing. I think you need to stop with the war terminology, given what's going on in the world. I don't think you understand what we're doing. Keep it going.

Yeah, what's going on in the world right now, Hard Rock. Indiana versus Miami, Dan, that's what's going on in the world right now. I think you're a little bit too myopic, all right? You got to zone in and figure out what's going on just about 25 miles north of you. All right, you need to lock in right now. You're a little bit too happy for a game day. You need to be pissed, Dan. You know what?

Because they want to come and take what we got. Okay? They got five national championships. Guess how many they have? Zero. Okay? We want a sixth. They want one.

They're trying to take it from us, Dan. You're not ready for that, apparently. Jonathan, get this guy, man. I do appreciate that your energy level is better than it started because you came in real sedated. You came in real sleeping for the biggest. No, it's not a sedated, Dan. It's not a sedated thing. It's a getting everybody focused thing.

Okay. It's getting everybody in the same in the same lock step. Okay. So yes, we're going to be live at Dead Flamingo tonight at 6 p.m. The show starts around 7. And then the game starts at 7.30. We'll be rocking here. Just on an MMA night, this place is absolutely packed and slammed. Tonight, there's probably going to be an overflow. We got things in the back here. Gaiotra's going to be absolutely lit.

From there, I'm bringing Mike Oswella with me, okay, to have it on deck so that we could just go and party once we take that ass. Okay. Oh, it's my gimmick, but you can use it today. He's borrowing it today. Okay, thank you, Tony. Finally, you show up. Finally, you show up. Zaz, where are you been?

I just asked you for three times to get this guy under control, and you've been silent like a mouse. Show started 20 minutes ago. You can't carry a segment on your own. We can throw it to you for two minutes. You're asking for my help. I can. I can't.

Because you're part of the team, no? I am part of the team. The show started 20 minutes ago. Okay. I gave you a platform here. So when I throw you in Al-Upe, when I throw you in Al-A-Upe, you slam it down on Dan's head. How about you hand on your business?

Buddy, I have been. I'm here, 10 toes down, in the streets right now. Boots on the ground. You're sat up. You're sat up with, I don't even know what you look like today. You know what? Are you wearing a Wai Aorta today? You know what I look like.

You know what I look like. Unfortunately. Okay, that's enough. Settle down, boys. It's too early for that pace yourself the way that Tony did at the beginning in the segment by sounding sedate. Let's go. Let's go.

All right. Let's go. Casa de los Trucos, please. I want a live hit. What? I want a live hit from La Casa de los Trucos, the most famous and oldest costume shop in America. Do you think they're going to be open this time? Yes, 10 a.m. they open. They are. They told me. 10 o'clock. I asked them to open early for Tony. Yes, they're going to be open. I want Tony in costume. Get over there, and he'll be tonight. He'll be at the Dead Flamingo if you want to spend any time with Tony.

The show will be out there. The show is going to be in a lot of different places tonight. Lucy, are you feeling confident in the Wi-Fi? Because we're going to be getting reports from you and Mike and Zaz's Wi-Fi permitting, but I don't have confidence in the Wi-Fi. Put on the poll at Lebitard show, do you ever have confidence in the Wi-Fi if you're trying to use it at a stadium full of people? No, that's why I said maybe, because I don't want to make any promises that I can't deliver. And I know that everyone's like, I wasn't going to tune into the live stream.

But now that Lucy's there, I'm absolutely going to. But now they're not going to come because they've heard about the Wi-Fi. I'm really sorry. I've just ruined this whole thing. going to the game is terrified to reach out to us during it. My dad's going. I'm like, you're going to check in with us? He's like, I got an email that we can't. I'm like, what about just call us? I think the only thing we're going to get from people in the stadium is a phone call. I don't think they want anyone doing any kind of live hit to join us. So if we get people,

it will be via phone only. I think Lucy got in trouble one time. I don't know what stadium she was at, but all of a sudden, one of our former employees was flying a drone. And that was like, it's illegal NCAA airspace. And we got into all sorts of. trouble because we were flying a drone around. Oh, yeah, that broke like federal law. That was different. We're not bringing a drone to the national championship game. We want to make that very, very clear, but you also... How about a plane? I want to bring

a plane to the national championship game. Can we bring a plane? I'd like to use a plane and fly it around the stadium. The way you use your money is so weird to me. Our money. It's our money. You sound like my family. Let's fly. We're going to fly a plane at some point this evening. I want to talk about some of the sports stuff, though, and without getting too heavy in the

analysis, I wanted to ask you guys for your opinion. Mario Cristobal said something that I agreed with. It's not just because I'm biased, though I can be accused of it. At the end of the Ole Miss game, Miami Secondary was super depleted, injured guys, and Xavier Lucas had left the game for a really questionable targeting call. And Mario Cristobal is saying correctly the idea that Lucas can't play the first half of this game, when that questionable call, which was clearly done without intent at all, Zaz.

Like, obviously not intent. And I don't know, I saw in the bills game that we're going letter of the law on rules. And there's no reason to have arbiters if you're going to do it that way. If you're going to do everything by letter of the law, there's no reason to have human beings applying subjective logic to something we all saw was a catch that turned into an interception. But Xavier Lucas lost the last half of that game. Miami secondary was a mess in the fourth quarter, like confused timeouts because they had a bunch of guys out there that aren't used to playing. and I think Mario Cristobal is right when he says it's wrong that Xavier Lucas has to sit out the first half of a championship game for something that was just a decision made in a moment and the receiver like the receiver put his helmet down and it got him hit in the head. The thing with targeting is like if you have a hit like that, I think a 15-yard penalty is fine.

But the way I feel like you have to look at it is like the way the government looks at like, is it art or is it porn? Like you know when you see targeting and you're like, oh, that was that was bad. was a hit you shouldn't have made that was worth a potential ejection. I think that hit was not worthy of that. I think that hit should not prohibit anyone from playing in the national championship game. So I think you just have to adjust how you look at it. I hate the targeting rule. Like I think Lucy's right. It's a 15-yard penalty. And 15-yard is a very punitive penalty. And then it's we're throwing them out not just for the rest of that game, but also the first half of the next game. I mean, if there's no way that you could say that he did it on purpose,

Maybe you think so. There's no way to know. And so you get the penalty and you essentially get a suspension. I hate it. It doesn't seem fair. That's... Per Ian Rappaport, the bills are moving on from head coach Sean McDermott after their loss in the divisional round to the Broncos. Not surprising. No, they had to. Not surprising. A lot of wins on that resume is probably the winning his coach over that period, I would think, because you guys have seen the stats over the last six years, right, on the bills. over the last six years, the bills are number one in point scored, number one in least points allowed. That makes them number one in point differential, but it's not just number one in point differential.

They're plus 900 in point differential. No one else is plus 600 in point differential. That's crazy. More on that on Friday. Well, they just did the breaking news thing. I know, yeah. It was worth mentioning. Nothing stopped. You got me for 15 more minutes. Don't threaten us.

Yeah. Why were Big Ten officials doing the Fiesta Bowl because that game was going to determine who is playing a Big Ten opponent and if you want to put on your conspiracy hat, Big Ten, Wisconsin, Xavier Lucas, tied up in litigation,

suing. I didn't feel great about that. I didn't like seeing the Big Ten officials on the game that would directly impact the Big Ten teams' title chances. What kind of officials are tonight? I think it's the ones from the Texas A&M game. Not Big Ten.

Big 12. I'm curious about where everybody feels Lucy's rooting interest should be as a rival, a Big Ten rival of the Indiana Hoosiers. The referees might be incented to see the conference do well, although what we end up seeing usually is that they don't want that stink of. You're biased in favor of your conference. So, in fact, they make calls to disprove that they're biased. That is the way things end up going. But in this case, Lucy, are you on the side of with, you know, 98% of football America on the side of the feel-good story that is Fernando.

Coach SIG and the Indiana Hoosiers? I root for my conference, which I know is not something that people do. No, and I get that it's odd, but there is my team, there is a direct incentive for Indiana to win. We get more money because Indiana wins. It's better for my conference. It makes my team look better. Isn't that like Miami rooting for FSU? No, because I went Indiana.

We are in the same conference. but we're not rivaled. What do you get a piece of the action? Don't fall back on some intellectual. It's good for the program ultimately in the long term. What's your heart? What's your gut tell you? Of course, they defeated you.

You should want to see them get defeated now. No, because it makes me look better. And my team was the team that was the closest to beating them. Yeah, I look like. No one's thinking about Iowa in this situation, and they shouldn't be. but there is a financial incentive for my favorite team. But it doesn't make you look better, though. I mean, if Iowa lost to a team that lost the national championship

or a team that won the national championship, like it's not that big of a deal, but I also like Signetti. I think it's a cool story. There's a lot of things that go with it. Also, I just like, you guys know I didn't really like living in Miami, and that sort of poured out into a hatred of all Miami teams. Across the board, the dolphins, the Marlins,

hell the Miami club volleyball team don't like them. You like the cyclones though. Do you think I love them. I love them so much. You remember your preseason predictions where you said we were going to be bad. Yeah, and I came out and said I was wrong. Yeah. I have no problem being wrong. It doesn't happen to me that often. Hate an ass hater. At Medcan, we know that life's greatest moments are built on a foundation of good

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Don Lebertard. You owe me everything. You owe me everything. You have added 10 years my career. Yes, I have. This man has. You haven't. That man!

Who the hell are you? Stugats. I am. Who the thing? Bullshit. You're a rude young man. You're a fool. You're a fool.

I already called you a fool. You can't call me easily. You're an idiot again. It's a fool-off. You're an idiot twice. You're an idiot for dismissing how much I've helped you. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. You guys are in agreement with me, independent of the biases as it relates to what

Christopal was saying about Lucas. We're all in agreement. right, that the targeting penalty should be something that has a measurement that's by degrees, that it's not the same penalty for every single targeting, that there should be some sort of arbiter saying, well, that clearly wasn't intentional. That clear, like, I don't, didn't Denzel Perriman, can you guys look this up for me, please? Did Denzel Perriman basically get suspended two games from the NFL on the Chargers simply for playing football way too violently? Like, just was basically Vantes Burefect, where in the...

You know how to Google that, Jeremy? In the modern age... No, I think that's... It is the Vontes penalty. Right. It's a pattern of bad behavior, which is better than you have to miss the second half of the national championship. That's way too severe and sort of out of the context of what happens in the moment. Now you're impacting the whole team.

The next game, it's a bizarrely harsh penalty. Why wouldn't the first targeting penalty be... you know, the warning. And if you do it again, then you get thrown out. It's right away. I'm okay with the idea that it's got to be safety first. I don't know how much of a deterrent it actually is, given how often it's happening accidentally.

It doesn't seem like it is. You know when it was a malicious nasty hit. You know it, you can see it. The porn theory. Yeah, the porn theory is right. Look, that's a great analogy. That's a great analogy. I always know porn when I see it.

Exactly. I've never been confused. So it's when you see a hit that's, so awful as Zaz can attest you know, okay, yeah, that's worth a suspension, but there has to be like a layer of like, like,

you have to be sort of objective with that. Put it on the poll. Is the targeting penalty like porn? You know it when you see it. I believe you know it when you see it is the way that a Supreme Court justice described porn, if I'm not mistaken. People versus Larry Flint. Great movie. The details on

tonight's game and Damashek's you are a die-hard Indiana, a router, and you're rooting, I think it's more than 98%. I think outside of Miami, you're not going to have a whole lot of people rooting for Miami because Indiana is the more charming story. And it's also the news story. Miami has advantages, as it always does on the offensive and defensive line. Indiana's right tackle is a problem. Miami's going to get frustrated tonight by the number of back shoulder throws to Sarat

that are then going to open up the deep throw to Sarat when you're expecting the back shoulder throw. You don't feel like young college football fans are looking at this game. I'm being, okay, Indiana's Indiana. It's the Midwest, you know, and Miami, that's cool. No. You don't think young college sports fans? No, not with your QB, who's two years removed from taking a class, which is a bad look,

staying that into a microphone. We all understand that that's what goes on in college football. It is a weird thing to announce. He took three classes up. He didn't even have to. You should celebrate. him for his altruism. He chose education and learning when he was done with school. Unlike Dion Sanders, who had a 0.0 GPA and was showing up to games in a limousine in a top hat his senior year.

Now listen, I went to Indiana University when Bob Knight was the coach and he was much praised for all of his guys. Went to every class. I shared classes with some of those players and they weren't there for many, many weeks at a stretch. So that was a little overstated. He's the goat. I do think it would been very funny for the follow-up to be. Well, Carson, what are those classes that you're taking? Because I refuse to believe. He's like, I'm still taking some. I asked you for matchups and game analysis and you started criticizing how many classes back is going to. I talked to Greg and Chris this morning about the game and I say it again to you now. Who gives a crap if you are on either side? Who cares about what the point spread is? If you are on the Hoosier's side or

the U's side. If you're getting involved and do you think they're going to cover seven and a half? Who gives a crap? Don't get caught up in that job. Good call, Shreif. Hometown cooking.

Hometown cooking. Get out, Dave. Can wait to do this live stream with you tonight. Would like to wait for the rest of my life pass away and have the live stream be at my funeral that involves Dave Jamich. Just you and Dave tonight in there.

I know, I know. You guys are saddling me with Davis. Zaslo goes to the game dressed like Luther Campbell. Mike leaves here early. Lucy leaves here as well and saddles me with Damashette. I still don't know why Mike's leaving early. Seven and a half minutes. I'll be there too. I promise you. I'm proud of you guys. You're pulling double duty on a holiday. This is crazy. The last couple of days of content I've really enjoyed. I'm going to support this live stream. I guarantee you you will be hearing from Mike Ruiz on this live stream. You can take that to the bank. Happy, it is a national holiday, happy David Getta Day.

And I met a special record. So this record is in honor of George Floyd. And I really hope we can see more unity and more peace when already things are so difficult. So shout out to his family. Drop was about to go. Yeah. It was Martin Luther King Jr.'s. I have a dream speech.

Is this cultural appropriation with Zazlo? I don't think he could be dressed like this, but I do think if there's a window for him to be dressed like this, 12 hours, these 12 hours are the 12 hours where it should be allowed. Can't be dressed like what? Like awesome? I don't see the problem. This is a bandana.

You do you, boo. I'm sorry you didn't recognize me. He walked in, Dan. That's your fault. You guys didn't give me the game analysis I was looking for Lucy or Mike. Mike, by the way, Keynes Insight. You have a targeting question. I haven't been asked my opinion on this game or how it's going to go.

Mike, what's your opinion? How's it going to go? We know how you think it's going to go. Kane's Insight is live all the time burping out and an immense amount of content. If you are a hurricane fan, Mike is one of the owners of Kane's Insight. So give us your best couple of minutes based on everything. at nonstop over the weekend. Kane's insight was belching out exhaust on this game.

Right. So here's how I think the game's going to go. I had a bold prediction that the line's going to fall down before the game. Right now, last numbers I saw, 78% of the betting public is on Indiana. Who cares about that? Let's talk X's and O's and Jerry's and Joe's. Miami outweighs that defensive line that doesn't have any depth. Go on by like 50 pounds. Miami runs a duo.

Indiana run stunts. Miami's going to average at least four yards of rush. Miami matches up really well here. I think Miami's going to go on 14 play drives. I think Miami's going to lean on these guys. They present a matcha problem that they haven't really encountered. And I think we're going to see a team wear out over the course of the game. Think back to the Carson Beck touchdown run.

Look at number 51 on the ground for seven seconds. That's what it looks like. And it's going to look like that again. I feel really good about this game. I feel better about this game than I felt the last game. Now, I have tons of respect for Indiana. I think the quarterback is fantastic. I think they have three receivers.

I think Charlie Becker's been unbelievable down this stretch. I love their offense. Full passing concepts out of RPO's. This is not like a sideline throw. They're running routes on RPO's. And Mendoza is extremely accurate. I'm a little worried about Xavier Lucas not being. there early on because you're going to need to be physical with these receivers, especially

Surat because he's a ball winner. I think Indiana's going to know right away they're in for a fight, and I think Miami wins. Go Keynes. Jeremy, update a couple of the things that we were talking about over this hour, please. Denzel Perriman was suspended for two games for repeated violations of playing rules intended to protect the health and safety of players, and I know it when I see it, was used in 1964 in the United States Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart described the threshold test. for obscenity in Jacob Bellis v. Ohio. I'm really curious to see what Indiana's defensive line does. Well, they do the same things Mississippi.

They do the same things Ole Miss does with the stunts. And Ole Miss has a more talented D-line, I think. And got to the quarterback. More than I expected. Yeah, their pass rush was good. So, like, when you're stunting, running up a team that runs the type of tight splits that Miami does, it's a little bit more complicated,

especially when that team is so beefy and big. So are they going to change up what they do? Are we going to break Indiana's tendencies? Are they going to trust that and think that if they get a stop early or Miami has a procedural, they can get them in like a third and long situation. Dare Carson Beck to be the guy. I think Sal's make fights and this is a really good matchup. And it's going to be a difficult one for Indiana, I think.

Carson Beck is in his seventh season and I did think, Lucy, you tell me if I have this wrong. The reason I was surprised at the amount that Ole Miss got to the quarterback is because I thought Carson Beck was allowed all season to play a game differently than most quarterbacks where he has a pocket. He has a clean pocket often. I'm almost always surprised when he doesn't have a clean pocket. And I'm certainly surprised when someone comes straight up the middle and sacks him. I thought Carson Beck played obviously a great season outside of that Louisville game. But I also thought he had advantages most quarterbacks in the sport don't have. He had an enormous. amount of time to make his decisions. That is one of the best offensive lines in the country. Like, it's very clear that's a Mario Cristobal offensive line right there in front of you. I think that's a lot of what this game is going to come down to is can Indiana make Carson back uncomfortable? Because I agree with you.

I thought Ole Miss did a better job than I expected them to do of putting Carson back in difficult situations. But that offensive line is so, so, so good. And I genuinely think that is sort of like the key to this game for Miami because I don't think it's going to come down to Carson Beck. I think it's going to come down to how you run the. the ball. Carson Beck is a very smart quarterback. Aidan Fisher is a former quarterback and an incredibly smart, knows exactly where to be at all times. The pre-snap battle of minds between Carson Beck and

Aidan Fisher will be really good. Also, a player to watch, a South Florida guy who knows all about Malachi Tony. I'm very curious where DeAngelo Pons lines up. It's one of the best corners of the nation for a five-foot-nine guy. Guy just does not miss tackles. Is it going to line up against Malachi Tony? If you're familiar with Malachi Tony's rise throughout South Florida sports, those who guys know all about one another. Can't wait for this game. Go Canes. Narratives. Just go ahead and leave now. One minute left with Mike. Take advantage of the minute.

No, let that be his last words. I can't wait for this game. Go Canes. He's not going to do better than that. I still don't understand why he has to leave early. Why the other people working the game like Lucy has carved out three separate hours to get to the stadium. Zazzo is going to go. At what time? At what time are you going, Zad? I'm going to leave after the show. Yeah, at a reasonable time.

But Mike has to leave right now so that he could start his tailgating right now. Darth Vader's trying to get in Skywalker's ear. You're the evil empire. Beat it. You're the... I will be beating it. The number six, go Keynes! You always have Fernando.

We didn't get an answer as to why he's leaving early. Thank you, Master, for all of your good work. Bye, Master. He was the get-back coach on Mike. He kept him away from killing Dave Damashek. We hired him for the day, human resources to protect us from having blood on the carpet. Happy New Year, everybody. 2026 is already getting off to an incredible start because you want to know how I rang in the new year.

It was with a bunch of friends in a Dallas hotel lobby bar ordering a bunch of Miller Lights because that's how you do it. That's how you make special memories. Miller Light has been by my side and many special football memories this year. And hopefully we get to write a few more memories with Miller Light. Some of my most legendary moments have started that exact same way. A buddy's house, a lobby bar, a game, no big plan. And then you crack open a Miller Light. You take a sip and you look around and you immediately recognize that you made the right call.

Legendary moments start with Miller Life. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller Lite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.