The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Rubbing One Out At The End of The World

Episode Date: February 7, 2024

Stugotz is convinced that someone has stolen his list of Top 11 Most Boring QBs To Ever Appear In A Super Bowl. Michael Rubin sold jet-skis when he was 14…maybe. Dan & co. discuss Lil Dicky taking a lil breaky from making “Dave” on Hulu. Plus, Jerry Seinfeld making a Pop-Tart movie is, uh. Certainly a choice.  Nicolas Cage was Superman for a few minutes; but he certainly did not fight a giant spider. Lucy is introduced to the infamous footage of Andy Reid as a gigantic child, dominating a punt, pass & kick competition. Also, we learn that the “P” in “Dan Patrick” stands for “phony”. The crew then discusses the logistics of rubbin’ one out at the end of the world. Plus, TRAIN TALK! Adnan and Samson then prove Dan’s theory that there are no good football movies by revealing their respective Top 5 Football Movies. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Giraffe Kings Network. 1-800-Flowers.com. Right now, at 1-800-Flowers, you can get up to 40% off a beautiful, gorgeous bouquet of one-of-a-kind arrangements that are guaranteed to wow your significant other. Please do not be like me. Don't put it off. Delivery dates are limited. Get up to 40% off today at 1-800-Flowers.com slash Dan. That's 1-800-Flowers.com slash Dan. The Dan LeBatard Show is twoats is presented by DeGiorno. It's not delivery, it's DeGiorno! This is the Dan Labatar Show with the Stugats Podcast. We are presented by Drap King Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the

NFL. Download the Drap King Sportsbook app today and use code DAN for a special offer when you sign up. That's code DAN only at Drapking Sports Book. Not since an unhinged and enraged Mike Ryan accused everyone who works at Metal Arc Media of stealing a photo of his daughter off of the refrigerator. a photo of his daughter off of the refrigerator. Have we had a stranger theft accusation around here

then Stu got wandering around the studio moments ago, wondering who stole his list of top 11 most boring quarterbacks ever to appear in a Super Bowl. He's looking under his computer. He looked under the cartoon snake over here. Not there. He cannot find this list. And Mike Ryan said, flippantly, as if he doesn't understand how much thought

goes into these lists of Stugatz, can you just do it off the dome? As if there's not a meticulous preparation and research staff. He's asking you if you can recreate it off the dome will get to that in a second but before we do so there are a couple of things that i wanted to talk about with the group uh... michael rubin is someone i wanted to discuss with the

mean because uh... he made the unusual moves to got of leaving an ownership stake with the seventy sixers to go to more profitable ventures in sports he now runs fanatics he's the one who put together that white party that had every celebrity in the world in the Hamptons a year ago and it's worth thirty one billion dollars and growing very rapidly like he's going to get into live events he's looking to take over he's an aggressive ambitious person who's going to get into live events. He's looking to take over. He's an aggressive, ambitious person who's going to vie for

richest person in the universe. And when I talk to him on highly questionable, I mean, it's a mindset that is outside of my purview where he went hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt as a 14 year old, like trying to run a jet ski business. It's like something I don't, I can't even fathom how business minds like this work, but you know something about what he did with the Sixers, he could have stayed there,

but he parlayed the relationship with Joel and Bede and sports ownership into something bigger and better than sports ownership. The reason he had to sell was because the venture he wanted to get into was gambling. He wanted fanatics. They have a sports book. They have a sports book. They have a sports book.

And so as an owner, he's not allowed to be involved in that. But he saw more money is what I'm saying. But of course, I mean, I think everyone sees more money in that as it's being legalized in more and more states. And so at that point, that's the inflection point for him, is I can continue to own this team and be, you know, a part of this thing that one day if I sell my stake, we'll bring back many, many millions, or I could be making

many, many millions right now doing this other thing. And so he sells at a high point, I might add, and invest that money into doing what is going to make him a lot more money. And because of his relationships that he had built during his time as an owner, now he's got all the people. He has access to all these people that maybe before it was a little, are you allowed to talk to that guy?

Cause, you know, is that tampering? Is that not tampering? Or maybe it was a lot of. Well, now he doesn't have to worry about that. He could talk to whoever he wants. It's a fascinating venture though, all of it. Not just what he's building, but how he built it. The jet ski thing is new to me.

I did not know that he started as a 14 year old selling jet skis. But it's an entrepreneurial mind that is outside. My mind doesn't work that way. I've sort of had entrepreneurship forced on me. It's not, I don't use that side of my brain. It confuses me. You didn't ask for any of this?

I did not ask for any of this. No, but I went to college for a year and said, I'm wasting my time here. I can't make money here. I can make money if I leave college. He left and made a lot of money. Do you remember what the things you guys were doing at 14 years old?

Oh yeah. Yep. Same things I'm doing now. Yeah, about five times a day. Yep. Dave Canals, hit your heart off. Business at 14 years old, that is something that is just simply unfathomable to me. I wanted to ask you guys...

One clarification, Dan. In the neighborhood of Jet Skis, but it was a ski ramp, not Jet Skis. Fine. That's $1.50. I don't think... Well, that's not the way that I remember the story being told. That's not the way I remember how it's work. To personally buy him.

The story told personally by him, though. It's a Mandela effect. You're correcting me on something. We got to find Mandela effect. You're finding me for something. Shack was in Kazam. Symbed was not in Shazam. He personally told me.

How much money did he lose? Does it say the number there? Does it say how much he went into debt at that age? What do you recall? Oh, then you're willing to trust my memory there? It was in Canadian dollars. Take a stab at it. Do any of you guys did you or do you watch Dave the...

200 grand, Dan. The FX, that's crazy at that age. That's crazy at that age. That's crazy at that age. How does that even happen? You must come from- Grand and stately typically. Great wealth. Nipple baby.

The FX series Dave, the first season of it was inventive and innovative, fun and huge. It's a big project and he is now taking, Lil Dicky is now taking time off he isn't saying he's not going to go back to it but he needs time off because it is consumed so much of his creative energy it is a giant creative swing i mean you love that show correct yeah i enjoyed it a lot it got a little

whiny as time went by but i overall i enjoyed. I thought it was a fun kind of, you know, another one of these quasi reality, it's not reality. It's all scripted, but you're going to see people like, you know, like Benny and like, you know, all these other characters that are real people. By the end though, Brad Pitt is in it by the end. And did this, did this break Santino or was he already somebody

who was a very popular comic before? I think the lockdown kind of broke Santino as comedy found this crazy resurgence. We're in a new golden era of standup comedy. Instagram, Reels, TikTok and podcast all blew up when people were locked down in their homes. And this kind of was parallel to that. It was a confluence of things that helped break Santino.

Someone else said it's a golden age of comedy. I believe on a podcast called South Beach Sessions. I believe his name is Sam Morill. So you should all check it out. It's out now wherever you get podcasts and on YouTube. But I digress. Santino, has he broken? I say this as someone who's a big fan of his

work I think he's hilarious to stand up is great he's been in a lot of shows is great he had a great Netflix special yeah so but like has he broken not not to the level of some of the other guys like not a list but on the internet yeah yeah he's not arenas he's theaters though yeah like the bad friends podcast is like selling out like full. For sure, but I feel like we're talking nits. I'm in that nits, so I'm like yes, but I'm wondering to the common person,

when I say Andrew Santino. Okay, let's see, let's analyze this for a second. Rogan is the one breaking comedians. All of the Rogan guys get big economies around them. He's Johnny Carson. Yeah, I don't think Santino was broken on his own with the Bobby Lee and just a social media-friendly nature picture.

To clarify, we're talking about the red-headed guy on Dave. Yes. Because I would bet some people listening do not know who that is. Yeah, so it's not there yet. I'm with the mean. I like the show a lot, but way too many dick jokes for me. That type of sense of humor is just, it's not for me.

His name is a little dicky. It's way too raunchy for me. I type of sense of humor is just, it's not for me. His name is a little picky. It's way too raunchy for me. I don't like sex jokes, penis jokes, jerk off jokes. It's just not for me. Milking. Way too many dick jokes for me personally. I think it's a smart show. I was being sarcastic.

She loves dick jokes. I don't think I mean really, I should have laid it on thicker. I think we could. Oh! Oh! I don't think I mean really I should have laid it on thicker. I think When we talk about comedians and comedians breaking Jerry Seinfeld is now making a movie Jerry Seinfeld is damn near 70 years old Stugatz and wow generally speaking Doesn't make bad choices. It's not just, I love- B movie. Yes, agreed.

It was all right. Comedians and cars getting coffee, I thought, was an excellent vehicle for him to try to do something after Seinfeld that can be his, and I love that show. But the choice he's now made with Melissa McCarthy, Fred Armisen, Jim Gaffigan, he's making a Pop-Tart movie.

And that one scares me for him. It scares me. Like there's some star power in there. His Pop-Tart bit is something that he's been doing for a long time. He's broken it out in a bunch of different shows. Everyone loves the Seinfeld Pop-Tart bit. Remind me of the Pop-Tart bit?

All of these. He just talks about what a wonderful, genius delicacy the pop tart is. So he's making a movie about it? He's making? A dangerous game. It's on Netflix. It's the thing about all of these comedians that we're talking about, all of them would say that he's the king.

All of them would point to him and say, they are trying to make him laugh. This movie worries me though, because I look at it and I'm like, man, this is gonna be a hard one to pull off. I learned everything I need to know when you said it's a Netflix movie. So let me give you the cliff notes. Hey Jerry, here's a lot of money, do whatever you want. You guys need editing or should I show you guys the slides?

No, no, no, whatever you want. Money Jerry Seinfeld, just do whatever you want. I'll do a movie about this pop-dart thing that I've been doing for years. But don't you think with the cast that you just rattled off that they're going to take a pretty humorous approach to self-serious movies of this nature?

No, but he's taken a big chance. And I mean, it's right. I totally agree with you. It's a money grab for him. This is the Adam Sandler formula, folks. Does it need money? It's the Adam Sandlerler, but he keeps doing it He's making money never enough here's money never enough here's money and then in return

You get to hire friends and this is gonna be the dead giveaway. He could have got money for just stand up No, no, but that's work. This is fun Hang out with my friends all day and I have to worry about making something good when Jerry Seinfeld does stand up Like there's a brand attached to that like I just gotta be good. I can't half-ass this. I'm Jerry Seinfeld I'm one of the greatest comics ever when Jerry Seinfeld makes a movie. No one has expectations. Just give me the money I disagree man Jerry Seinfeld cares what has his name on it be movie Was fine for what it was. It's a TikTok cult classic now.

What? The kids love the B-movie. I think back positively on B-movie. I don't remember anything about it, but I just remember watching it and being like, You can't really disparage a children's film. You can't have work-up really strong opinions about baby's kids. I can and I will. Can I say something that I believe

all of you will find shocking? Jerry Seinfeld is older than Greg Coding. No! It's crazy. I just looked it up to confirm it. Not true. Five months older. You're looking at the internet wrong. Fine. Jerry Seinfeld doesn't need money. Don't he and Leno both have airplane hangers plural filled with cars? It's easy money, Dan. I don't stand to do this. It doesn't need any more money. I'm just saying that-

Either does Cliff Kingsbury and he's going back to coach. Why does anyone do anything- Dr. Rivers, does Dr. Rivers need more money? Okay, I stand corrected. Forgive me, Cliff Kingsbury surely has as much money as Jerry Seinfeld. Ha ha ha ha ha. Stugazir, when you love someone, you protect them in the best ways you can. I'm playing film. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Guys, I have had Simply Safe in my home for many, many years now. I swear by them, the peace of mind it gives me when I am away.

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Download the DraftKings Sports Book app today and use code Dan for a special offer when you sign up. That's code Dan only at Draft King Sportsbook This show is a little bit infatuated with Nicholas Cage. Nicholas Cage is famously wonderfully strange Likes to you know spend a lot of money on ancient human skulls and whatnot dinosaur egg I think he he is owned or owns castles. And he makes a lot of movies, at least in part, because there are a lot of taxes to be paid. I don't think there is a more prolific actor.

I think Mike Ryan's obsession with Nicolas Cage includes him having a pillow in his home that features the face of a bloated Nicolas Cage, correct? A bloated is, you're adding that. I think it's fine in that photo. That's in my pillow. And if it's too much for you. On your pillow, not in your pillow. No, it's hiding.

It's hiding. It's one of those things that it can look like a normal red throw pillow, but then if you give it a swipe with your hand, you reveal Cage. His latest movie, Dream Scenario. I don't know if it's his latest, he might've made four more since I saw Dream Scenario.

It's got to be just 17 in development, he's slowing down. It's excellent, but he's got a ton of bad movies, a ton of bad movies, he seems to always be working. What is this clip that we're throwing it to? So I tried to not give too many spoilers for this very controversial film for all sorts of reasons, mainly the leading man in the film, but the Flash. And Amin and I were just talking before we started recording about how critically it flopped box office. It was a flop. But the people that actually

went to see this film, the audience rating wasn't so bad because it was great nostalgia. It was kind of this new trend of superhero movies that it had a multiverse and Nicholas Cage actually has a cameo in this film as Superman. It's great Nicholas Cage lore that there was a Tim Burton Superman film with Nicholas Cage playing Clark Kenton Superman. Shelf. No one's ever seen it or it's not been seen publicly. Well, no, it never got made.

It never got made. They were pretty far along in pre-production. There's occasionally a costume photo of Nicholas Cage dressing Superman that will pop up on your social media. Did you know? So this was actually a really cool part of the flash is that you actually got to see some of this vision, Tim Burton's vision, play out as an alternate universe version of Superman appeared.

And if you're a Nicholas Cage nerd or a comic book nerd, you kind of popped for this. The problem with the Flash was it was supposed to kind of be in this dream state. And so they had really bad CGI that a lot of people checked out on. And Nicholas Cage was really excited to take part in this role, and he explains his experience on it,

and how it kind of went south for him. First and foremost, I was on set. They did put a lot of time into building the suit. And what I was meant to do, and by the way, Andy, who I think is a terrific director, he's a great guy and a great director and I loved his two it movies, great people, him and his sister. What I was supposed to do was literally just be standing in an alternate dimension if you will and witnessing the destruction of the universe.

I was, Kellel was bearing witness of the end of the universe and you can imagine with that short amount of time that I had, what that would mean in terms of what I can give a, I had no dialogue, convey with my eyes the emotion. Okay, so that's what I did. I was on set for maybe three hours. When I went to the picture, it was me fighting a giant spider. I did not do that.

How do you not love that guy? Do you think, do any of you think that we can try to convey us watching the end of the universe with just our eyes? Yes, yes, absolutely. I think we should go around the room and we should go back. All right, this is not great. That's why we should probably keep the

content going and Sage doomsday in the penalty box green screen room and we'll just take turns conveying that as the content rolls on. In the intro, I mean, go ahead since it was such a bad idea to execute on the fly, you go be first. He thought it was a good idea, I mean. You go and sit in the penalty box and then you try to convey to us. We will go one by one in there and try to convey to people with our highs what it would look like if we were witnessing the end of the universe or fighting a giant spider. Just trying to remember what my face was when Brian Windhorst reported that LeBron was going back to the calves

In the time that we're waiting for a mean to get set up Let's introduce Lucy to Andy Reed in the punt pass and kick Competition when he was 14 years old This is a video that we used to play all the time on High League Questionable because it's wonderful and because look at Andy Reid and how much bigger he is than the other kids there and watch him throw a football right now. Andy Reid throwing a football as a 14 year old number 34 launching a pass. Uh, yeah, about 20. That's further than Chad Pennington.

From the 18 to the. Yes. About 20. That's further than Chet Pennington. From the 18 to the... Oh, no, yeah, yes. Other 45? Good math, Chris. Go ahead and try to figure that out. He finally releases, maybe the 19 he releases. It's the 19. About 40 yards as a 14-year-old.

Land on a 45. He's at the 15. Now, let's watch Rishi Rice of the Chiefs watching this video because Lucy, you've never seen this, correct? Are the other kids 14? Everyone's the same age and Andy Reed is twice as large as all of them. Don't buy it. Birth certificate. You want to see it?

It's like Benchwormer scene. I am 12. That's what Andy did. Rishi Rice had the same sort of skepticism that you do. Look at Rishi Rice here, not believing that that's his coach. I don't know if you've seen this video of your coach, here not believing that that's his coach. No way, so I asked him, I asked him about it. He goes, yeah, yeah. 100% I wasn't able to take this is the ranch. This is that like halftime of a ranch. No, I don't know which I built, but that's crazy.

I like him. This is because of AI. You can't trust the video. Also way too much flair on these Super Bowl kits for the Kansas City Chiefs. Oh, come on. Especially with Mahomes with the Captain C on there. You got four pieces of flair plus his shield. It's too much guys. Come on. You know what I am stunned we haven't gotten to? I am stunned that Stugatz hasn't stormed in here screaming about it because he's got feuds with a handful of esteemed media members. Mike Wilbon, Rich Eisen is a good one. Rich Eisen is indignant that he

would ever steal an idea from Stugatz. Dan Patrick, did you see what he suggested last week? Super Bowl Saturday. I mean, the P and Dan Patrick stands for phony. He knows good and well that I have been talking about that for many, many years. In fact, I talked about it two weeks ago with Chris Sims, who agrees with me that the Super Bowl should be on a Saturday. I can't believe we're finally having this discussion. It's a good take. It was a good take at the time you had it. The chief complaint, Lucy, is that he doesn't feel well on Mondays after the Super Bowl.

He feels like he needs a day of recovery, like from a hangover. I think that's fair. I think most of America feels that way. You eat like crap, you're drinking, like that's your best take ever. My other complaint is when I say it, no one says anything. Dan Patrick says it and discusses it on his show and all of a sudden it blows up into big news. Oh, what a great idea. Oh, Dan Patrick, what a forward thinker. Oh, DP, get out of here.

I said it seven years ago and no one said a word. You know what, Stu? I was thinking the same thing of when I was watching all the Swifties post about Colin Coward. I was like, minus you, we've all had that take on this show. How come Dan didn't go viral with it? How come Colin went viral with it?

Is it because he's a silver fox to these people? I don't know. Answer the question. You just came back in here and you're going, hmm, hmm, while chewing. No, I'm not chewing. While chewing, I was going, hmm. You have the remnants of food in your mouth,

but while you were watching the apocalypse, the universe collapsed in the other room, you were eating something, you were eating chips, I think. It's called method acting, Dan, you should look at that. You weren't eating? I mean, my character was eating, yes, I was. If you were watching the end of the world, you would get a last meal in, right?

I mean, right? Just a quick one. Cold stone. A little snack, yeah. I would eat so much ice cream. Chicken cutty, I mean. I feel like that's a spot where you would lose your appetite. I feel like the destruction, the sort of,

the rivers of sewage running through the streets with human bodies. There's one thing that you need to be doing in that spot. I'm not gonna be eating cheesecake. No? You sure about that? You sure about that? Severed human heads rolling down the street.

You've got me just lopping stuff onto a plate from a Chinese buffet. Sure do. I got just getting honey chicken and extra fried rice. Rivers of blood in the street. It's not ideal, but you got to rub one out in that spot. Really? Now I've lost my appetite even more than I did seconds ago. You got to at least give it a go. Are you rubbing one out like for posterity, or is it turning you on? You're like, I got it tight even more than I did seconds ago. You gotta at least give it a go. Are you rubbing one out like for posterity

or is it turning you on? You're like, I got it. No, it's certainly not turning me on. What if you already did it five times that day? Come on, dig deep. Lucky number six. The great ones sell their body not today or sometimes today for a six time.

Fall five times, get up six. Did I just hear off microphone? The word chafing. Oh, it is a huge issue It's not gonna matter if you're gonna die right there's like an injury report two weeks That'd be a lot of pressure. I got an hour to live Put it on an hour to live an hour. This is not an hour Dude, that's like 30 seconds. What I do the the other five minutes and 30 seconds. All right, put it on the poll. Depending on the show. Internet's down.

An hour. Damn. I was truly terrified that Dan was going to say, all right, just go ahead, go over there. Rub one out in 30 seconds or less. And I'm like, wait, Dan, come on. This is a family show. Is Dan going to check out the end of the world?

And he is. Or to rub one out. We'll find out together. Rub. I don't know. Is that Starship Troopers? to check out the end of the world. And he is. Or to rub one out. We'll find out together. Rub one? I don't know. I don't know. Is that Starship Troopers?

Is that Starship Troopers? It is Starship Troopers. With a couch in the middle of it. File. Yeah, that would be an awesome way to watch a movie, right? That's just what it's like to sleep when you live in Miami. The noise outside is just. This is what's happening around here.

That is actually stock footage from our time at the Cleveland there. By the way, let me just say really quick, do you guys know there's like an Instagram account that tracks the Brightline and whenever it hits the bar? Yeah, it's propaganda, guys, man. But like for the last, for example, the most recent post there was once again, Brightline hits another and the details of the person driving the car was Baker acted because he purposefully drove into the bright line was omitted.

But that's my point, it's like, regardless of whose fault it is, isn't it proof positive that like South Florida drivers, Miami drivers are the worst? They're the worst! Is it ever the trains fault? The train is never a surprise! It literally goes in one direction.

Never a surprise! It doesn't jump. It's three minutes before it comes, it's like ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! I will say in the defense of some people, the traffic patterns around some of the train stops, especially in Miami is, it makes no sense. There's like intersections at train crossing.

Cause we just put that train here. Exactly. I could see how people would get confused, especially, actually, real quick, well, I'm gonna run out of time, but I have a great train story for the next hour. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Let me segue into my train story. So I was actually walking across a train crossing with Willow a few months ago. We were walking across a train crossing

and the light started going on and the bar started going down and there was a guy next to me and we both stopped and the bar went down and landed and like hit him in the head. Like he was standing at the sidewalk. He could have gotten out of the way. He deserves it.

It was like ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. And it hit him in the head. he was standing at the sidewalk and it hit him it was like ding ding ding ding and it hit him in the head he turns to me he turns to me and he says you could have warned me really I swear to god my jaw hit the floor my fault this guy was not paying attention and the thing ding ding ding Hit the floor This has got to be a joke he was a hundred percent serious he wanted me to warn him and then a train killed Everyone knows it's not Valentine's Day without the flowers so whatever you do don't be like me Don forget the flowers. Beat the Valentine's Day rush and order early at 1-800-Flowers.com. Right now, at 1-800-Flowers, you can get up to 40% off a beautiful, gorgeous bouquet of one-of-a-kind arrangements that are guaranteed to wow your significant other.

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Whole lot of Super Bowl coverage everywhere, but as others are intensely covering the Super Bowl, we go out to our baseball guys, our movie guys, the stars respectively of Nothing Personal and Cinephile, David Sampson and Adnan Burke to do our top five football movies. I believe that generally speaking, I'm going to have a hard time finding five football movies, I think are great. I think football generally does not produce very good movies. Baseball can produce some. Basketball hasn't produced many either, but I think football is particularly weak.

Let's see what they've got here, because between the two of you, if there's a lot of disagreement here, it means that you guys are gonna find 10 football movies that you think worthy of respect, and I'm not sure there have been 10 of those made, but we'll see. We're gonna start with David Samson as we usually do again. Nothing personal is his podcast. It covers sports business very well. It covers a lot of terrain very well.

Let's start David. The sports business stuff is good Dan. The movie stuff is not so good. Just make that clear for the audience. Okay there is a lot of disagreement here. I feel like it was gratuitous before we've even started, but he's doing sort of calisthenics here. It's like Jim Carrey warming up for that cable guy exhibition. Let's see what we've got here, David Sampson. Number five, please.

I had a hard time getting down to five. That's how many good football movies there are. Number five is Brian Song. Chris Cote, you're the executive producer that requires fanfare. I don't know what you're doing other than sitting there staring at me. No, I hit the button, it just didn't work. That's not what was happening. You weren't anywhere near the button. No, I saw it. It just didn't work. For some it didn't fire off. Peter's buffering.

That was a good one. It's from the 1970s. Jessica, have you seen that's about it's about dying and it's sad I've heard it's very sad. I have not seen it number four again though. It's a 50 year old movie Yes, it's 50 year old James con terrific. Yeah number four Rudy Who can't root for Sean Aston? He's my size. It's a great performance and it is what I always wished I could do. Just give me one moment in time. No, no, overrated is Rudy.

I love Ned Beatty. He's fantastic. And yes, it's notable for the fact John Favreau is a cameo, Vince Vaughn as well. But David, you know as well as I, this is not just stretching the truth. This is stretching all credibility. This guy is a walk on who had one play in his life.

And also, that's worthy of being one of the greatest football movies of all time. I like the last 10 minutes, the previous hour 40, a little bit ridiculous. I don't need Charles S. Dutton all of a sudden being redeemed, this old aging black man now redeemed by this young football player who gets his moment in the solitary clapping in the tunnel.

It's very far fetched. I can't believe it's in your top five. My parents are in that movie. I can't believe that you had that much to say negative about Rudy. I don't think I've met anybody who didn't love Rudy. The dad and the brother cheering in the crowd at the end is gooseies every time.

That's the scene that my parents were there. Yeah. Your parents were in the actual movie. Wait, they were there? Yes, they're in Rudy. They filmed the stadium scenes of Rudy during half time of a Notre Dame game. I believe I may have been in utero at the time actually.

I'll have to look into that. Put it on the pole please, Juju, at LeBatard show. If Jessica was in the womb at the Notre Dame game featured in Rudy, does it mean she was at the game? Yes or no? At LeBatard show. Are you guys starting the last 10 minutes with the scene of all of the players coming in

and putting their jerseys on the desk? Exactly, no, I'm not including that, Dick, because that's the most ridiculous scene. Like, that never happened. It's so absurd. It's a movie. This one's for Rudy. No one said it's documentary.

I can't wait for you to criticize my number three. Number three. The Water Boy. Ha ha ha ha. Go ahead. I'm just going to tell you that if you watch The Water Boy Number three the water boy Go ahead I'm just gonna tell you that if you watch the water boy and a don't think it's a football movie and B You don't laugh. It's not that funny. You're a Grinch Billy Madison's funnier Mr. Deeds is a little bit funnier like this isn't that funny the water boy of Adam Sandler's uvra It's not strong doesn't carry the water ain't over. I don't feel like you can use uvra

when it comes to the Adam Sandler genre. I do believe that that particular genre doesn't deserve that word. We'll up upon an ade. We'll up upon an ade. Number two. Number two, the blind side. I am more than happy to ignore the reality of what went on

and whether or not it's true, not true, what you knew, is it a money grab, what did the parents know, all I know is Sandra Bullock won an Academy Award and the Blindside is the second best football movie I've ever seen. That's an absurd take. I mean, this is one of these movies that appeals to the heartland. It's got all these old school values, i.e. square, boring, generic, soft focus. Like there's nothing with the blinds and it's awfully memorable. It's so contrived.

It's so melodramatic, David. How could you fall privy to Hollywood machinations that actually get seduced into this kind of nonsense? Well, I try never to fall into machinations, but I do like being seduced. Hell yeah. Number one, the best football movies, one of my favorite movies of all time. And it is the Cameron Crow, Uvra, Jerry Maguire. You complete me. I mean, I don't know what you want me to say. I mean, it's all right. Cuba Gettings, you never should have won an Oscar.

It's a little absurd now in retrospect. He's a pretty average actor, so it was an Academy Award winner, but it's got some moments. Again, number one is Outlandish, but it's a good movie. It's got some moments. It's one of the great quotable movies there is.

People, when you say you had me at hello, people know exactly what that is, even if they haven't seen the movie. When you talk about a treatise or an opus, what he did when you have dealt with agents the way I know you have and I have. It really is spot on. It's just a perfect movie, actually. The perfect movie. Do you have Adnan in your top five without spoiling it? Do you have any of his movies in your top five?

No, I don't, Dan, because I like to have good movies in my list. So my list is actually excellent. I have ignored all of Samson's list because it's obviously terrible movies. I mean, I'm still getting over the bloods of it number two, but go ahead. Number five. No, hold on just before we do that, are you in disagreement with me the way David is on what I believe, which is there haven't been that many good football movies made? I would agree with you on that Dan. I think generally baseball, again, the sport closest to me and David's heart, I think is just rich terrain when it comes to baseball. Boxing movies, of course, there's a ton.

Raging Bull, Rocky, Requiem for Heavyweight. You can go all the way back to the 50s and 60s. Fat Cities are great films. So, yeah, I think boxing and baseball lends itself there. Football, not very fertile territory for great football movies. Basketball's worse, though, right? Yes, worse. Luke dreams, Whiteman can't jump. Hoosiers. That's it. Fast break.

Lovin' basketball. Lovin' basketball. Teen Wolf. Number five, Adnan. I'll take Teen Wolf. I had a Lovin' basketball. Number five is North Dallas 40. Terrific book. Adapted in the movie, Nick Dolty. That was a movie that was really showcased how tough that football was, how tough these football players were. It was gritty, it was hard edge. And again, as I've said to you before, Dan,

Nick Nolte has a voice like a talking ashtray. So he's gotta be on this list of great football movies. That's number five. Do we have the Nick Nolte mugshot ready to go? A video, throw that up at some point before the end of the segment, whenever you want to. But again, Tony, Jeremy, Jessica, I worry about the fact that you have now selected another movie from the 1970s that our young people could not possibly have any less interest

in. All of them turn their nose up at Adnan's number five. I've never heard of it. I thought it was a highway. I mean. Take the North Dallas 40 this way. Head out never heard of it. I thought it was a highway. I mean, take the North Dallas 40 this way. Head out that way. True or not true. Put it on the pole, Juju, at Leviton show. North Dallas 40, a 70s football movie or direction someone gave you. Number four, Adnan. It's a fair point by Tony. I'm going to go with undefeated.

It's an outstanding sports documentary. Came out a few years ago on Netflix, won an Academy Award. It's really, to me, what grassroots football is all about. When you look at the impact that football can make in the entire community, it's what the best documentaries do, which is that take a small subject and use it in the specific make it universal. Why am I still seeing Nick Nolte undefeated as number four? I have never heard of undefeated. I don't know who is in that movie. I don't know anything about the movie you're just referencing.

What year was that? I'm going to say 2012 2011. 2011. Yeah. How do you guys feel about undefeated? Jeremy and Jessica, they picked a movie from the last ten years if any of you Seen it never heard of it It is a documentary that does have a 96% on rotten tomatoes Which seems to go with a lot of what adnan normally does on these lists

Which is to say rank good movies, so yeah, no, it's not a criticism Number kind of sounded like it number three. It did sound like it. Number three. Friday Night Lights. I didn't like that. I didn't like it. Didn't like the Billy Bob Thornton is phenomenal playing the coach who somehow motivates his team

against the Permian Panthers. You're telling me you don't like this underdog show. All of your movies all about the sentimental claptrap. And then I give you a movie which is a feel good movie in many ways underdog story trying to overcome the mighty powers Texas football Friday night light spawned a retell vision show and now you go man I didn't like that one yes that's pretty much what he did number two any given Sunday Al Pacino is Tony Domano just roaring in the face of Jamie Foxx at one scene Oliver still has the hoods but to intercut Ben Her with a scene between

them the chariot sequence it's got lots going for including a very creepy James Woods Lawrence Taylor is amazing James Jim Brown one of the greatest vocal players of all time is in the movie there's a lot to love about any given Sunday it's a little over the top it's a little bit ridiculous but nobody can deny it's very entertaining including Cameron Diaz playing a rather unlikeable owner. It's not even James Woods' best football movie. That's a movie called Against All Odds. Jessica, the size of the yawn that you just unleashed

in the face of Adnan's number two. I like Friday Night Lights, by the way. The series was also, I guess, great. I mean, the second season was a travesty, but the rest of it was fun, good characters. Number one. Shout out to Connie Britton. Number one is Silver Linings Playbook.

["Several Linings Playbook"] Bradley Cooper, fellow Philadelphia Eagles fan, phenomenal story. It mixes both romance and drama and a lot of football. Robert De Niro Oscar nominated best supporting actor at playing a diehard Philadelphia Eagles fan. Great pathos in the scene in which he's talking to son, struggling with mental illness with Bradley Cooper.

The romance with him and Jennifer Lawrence. This film made Jennifer Lawrence a star after Winter's bone platter on the map. And Cooper, until Maestro had never been better. Silver Linings Playbook is a film that you can watch with anybody at any time. It's a great movie and a great football movie. I would like to see that on the poll, Dan,

if I could sit in your chair for less than a second. Does anyone consider Silver Linings Playbook a football movie? Yeah, we were having that discussion back here. I agree it's a great movie, but football movie? No, remember the Titans boys? Come on. Yeah, what the heck?

How could we? Tony, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,, what the heck? Tony no, no, so free with the free bro. This is not that great back to civilized play But how is that not a football movie?