The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Stephanie (Mexican)

Episode Date: January 8, 2024

Our entire crew is crushed after the Dolphins blew a lead in both last night's game AND the division to the Buffalo Bills...except for Mike and Jessica. Can this Dolphins team go on the road and win in the Playoffs? Does this result represent how Fins fans should feel about Tua? Could this all have been avoided if we didn't have a Watch Party for Dolphins-Titans? Then, it's time to discuss the NFL coaching carousel and the future of Bill Belichick. Plus, Taylor's greatest embarrassment is exposed by Leaky Faucetard, Jessica's Top 5 Teams She Wrote Off that Made the Playoffs, Stugotz's dueling Top 5 with Jess, Baker Mayfield, and a guy stuck in a vase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Giraffe King's Network. This is the Don't LaboTar Show with the Stugat's Podcast. This should be an interesting one today because we've got a handful of people who are broken who have come in here fundamentally broken and we've got not broken a back-row smettie who's caffeinated up fired up because her Steelers are in the playoffs again Mike Ryan also has three days of silence and fired up about football, just generally NFL happy. But Chris Cody just moments ago took some of those cucumber strips off of his eyes, remembered

to do it. And when Mike walked past him, said to him, you've got something in your beard, he's wrecked, Billy Stugotch just finished God blessed football a couple of minutes ago and I will tell you I have the following information just from Stugotch walking into the room. He's like it is what it is. I couldn't get any thoughts together. That's how he was promoting God bless football. Bad sell by you.

People don't need to know that. Terrible sell you right. Yeah, Jesus need to know that. Terrible sell. You're right. Jesus. Lucy's back. She's going to be talking to us pre-reviewed national championship game. Check it out.

Correct. And Billy's big board bets for two last night. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. You also stayed at the hotel last night. Yeah. And this will surprise no one. Brushed your teeth with your finger this morning. And was the last to arrive and had everyone waiting for him.

I was waiting on a toothbrush. I forgot a toothbrush, so I started to brush with my finger. It wasn't going well. I called down to the lobby, asked them to bring up a toothbrush. They brought one up, but it took like 10 minutes. I mean, it's not their fault. I'm not blaming them. I'm just saying it took like 10 minutes.

By the time I realized that's why I was late I apologize, but Billy is right. I was steps away from the studio and I was the last one of us to get here I'm sorry. I found out today, Dan He's only used the elevators in this building two times and we've been here like seven months now Yeah, well, he's the only one who stayed here though. He stayed here a few times This is my second time staying here and that's the only reason or the times that you have used the elevators. There are other reasons, I mean.

I mean, yes, you've seen how glorious the gym is here. You've heard it from right outside the studio and then it just get in the car. We have a gym. It's two stories, it's a giant gym, it's beautiful. Really? Yes, it's one of the signature items here at the ELSA. They got an abroller residences

They've got a body by Jake. Yes Correct me if I'm wrong because we were in the middle of it last night We will play a snippet of Stugots giving hot takes while being mashed. Thank you to everybody who participated in the draft party It was a lot of fun. Except for, I'm sorry, the watch party. Except for the fact that it feels like the dolphin season ended at the end of the night. And I wanna see if I have this wrong

because Chris Cody, the team I saw yesterday cannot go on the team I saw yesterday, cannot go on the road to Kansas City, to Buffalo, to Baltimore. That's not a manageable slalom course. The season's over unless some of those big teams lose and you don't have to go through Kansas City, Buffalo, and Baltimore. And at the end of the game, you're throwing into double coverage to chase Claypool. At the end of the game, there were three times this season, Stugots, where the Dolphins had a one-score game with the ball for the final time.

This doesn't count the Dallas game because Dallas had, with whatever time remaining, Dallas did have some time left at the end of the game. They're very little, not very much. But three times, the dolphins had the ball with a chance to win the game and all three times they didn't score any points. And that's how they go from two to six. Somehow Buffalo yesterday could have gone at the beginning of the day. Buffalo could have been eight. They could have been out of the playoffs. Instead, they're the two seed by winning that game.

And you lose to Josh Allen twice this season. You feel good about your chances to beat, even if you get past Kansas City. Even do you feel good about your chances? Now you gotta go on the road and in the cold for the rest of the games. Like I don't want to be something. Well depending on what happens here.

But I mean, I don't, I don't wanna say the season's over, Dan, what I will say is I could see the dolphins being the chiefs this weekend. Okay, and I can see anybody winning anything in a one game sample, but we can all agree, right? That's Slalom course of buffal buff, you're gonna go on the road against teams that are better than you when you're injured and playing the cold,

like in what world? And what world are you winning the three of those games? And I know that I've been given Dolphin's fans some guff because of all the excuses that they've had, but last night you guys crushed the Vengeance whole threshold where Melvin Ingram started getting meaningful snaps. So I think now you can use that excuse. You're too hurt.

You had a three game lead with five games remaining. They're past to the Super Bowl is clearly difficult. And no one's gonna argue with you at that. It's impossible. Yeah, like I'm with you. It's not that it's difficult. It's not possible. I'm with Dan.

I'm with Dan. Obviously it's pot like you guys want to do the game. Yes, it's possible, but it's not that it's difficult. It's nothing's possible. I'm with Dan obviously It's pot like you guys want to do the game. Yes, it's possible But it's not gonna happen But if we want to talk deeper than that is this a good season for the dolphins and the answer all year has felt like yes And it's no if they don't win in Kansas City falsehoods This is why this is a good season for the dolphins and you guys need to remember this right now to a led the league in passing yards Tyree kill led the league and you guys need to remember this right now. Tuah led the league in passing yards. Tyree Keele led the league in receiving yards. He was one shy of 1,800.

It's the first dolphin player to ever lead the league in receiving yards. Raheem Moster led the NFL in rushing touchdowns and he was tied for most touchdowns with Christian McAfry. Also, I have a reminder here to cancel the red zone, which I just did, which made me so happy. Also, Tuah had the third most passing yards in dolphins team history of this season.

Now, there was the extra game that Damirino didn't have, but it was three. You should be happy with this season, and it's not impossible to do the Super Bowl, and I have marked that down, and if we're in Las Vegas, and the Dolphins have to be playing the Super Bowl, Chris Cody, I'm making a decision here

on behalf of the company, will not be attending that game. Dan said at first, I was just comparing with Dan. You know, I'll be buying the tickets himself. He will not be allowed to miss work on one day. My mom will be buying it. Nope, you will not be allowed to be on one day.

My mom already said she's going if they make the Super Bowl and she's buying it. I'm calling your mom and you're not going. You're not going, you're grounded. Chris is grounded, he's not going to the Super Bowl. But seriously, can we talk about, all right, you wanna talk about Tua? Let's, I wanted to save this conversation

for after the season, but you saw Tua on that bootleg. You ended the season. You saw Tua on that bootleg last night. It was a successful nine yard run and it was the worst thing I saw all night. That right there, let me know. And then you see Josh Allen latent that game on like third and 38, breaking 42 tackles

and getting over the first down line. Like these are two different quarterbacks. Like you can talk accuracy all you want to with those way too many interceptions. If you're not gonna run, if you're gonna run like Josh Allen, you can't throw interceptions. You know what I mean,

Josh Allen throws interceptions, but at least he can run the ball. To it throws a lot of interceptions, can't run the ball at all. It's just, there's a gap there with those quarterbacks. You want him to be running? At his side. I want a quarterback that can do both.

I think in all of the sad set billy mentioned which were impressive the one that was missing was to a plate all eighteen yeah and that that was a huge deal entering this season right a season which they only beat one good team in the Dallas Cowboys and they did so with field goals and i guess it's it's it's inverted that the bills are playing their best football at the right time and the dolphins seem to be playing their worst football at the worst possible time. They are one and five against playoff teams.

The dolphins are this year, but Dan talks about this all the time. He says it almost every single week, which team is going to be healthiest at the end? And the dolphins got unhealthy really, really quickly. On the bright side, the dolphins are three and oh, and the postseason against Kansas City. Mm-hmm. What decade was it? The bad side of that in the postseason against Kansas City. Mm-hmm. What decade was it? The bad side of that is the last game was in 1994. The cheats are due.

And they also haven't beaten the cheats in 13 years. And it hasn't been since Chad Pennington that you guys actually get to go into the playoffs with your starting quarterback. Mm-hmm. I like the dolphins this week. I'm just going to go to record and say it right now. The cheats have not looked overwhelming. Yeah, you could say the weather. I like the dolphins. Dolphins and the chief this week. I'm just gonna go to record and say it right now. The cheese have not looked overwhelming. Yeah, you could say the weather.

I like the dolphins. Dolphins and the chief hung together. I don't disagree that they can win that one game, but overall, like we can have a discussion. Like this was not, this didn't go the way we wanted to. But for five weeks ago, we were 10 and three. Chris, if they can win in Kansas City at Arrowhead, they can win any win.

They can win. Not this year, that's not true. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Are you guys? How is it not true? He's right about that. Are you guys saying that any congratulations Las Vegas Raiders?

You can win anywhere. Are you guys saying that it's impossible for the Steelers to pull off an upset next week against the bills? Because I could see that happening too. And then what happens? If that happens, if the dolphins win, now I'm back. And then the Steelers played the bills,

then the Steelers have to go to Baltimore. And then what happens? Any given Sunday? Baltimore sometimes throws up on themselves in the playoffs, Dan. You can't say that that's not the whole time. All the championships, MediBull, Billy? It's possible. I'm just saying it's possible. And if that happens, Chris is grounded, and he's not going. The part that I disagreed with, impossible, you can create those scenarios where the top teams are losing

and then the dolphins can even have a home game within one of those scenarios. But I'm talking about having to go through Lamar Jackson on the road, you know, you're going through Patrick Mahomes on the road and you're going through Josh Allen on the road. You mentioned all of those stats, but I will go back to what I was saying about the end of games and the winning that's required from your star players at the end of games. In all three of those one score games that I was talking about to God against the chiefs and others where they have the ball and a chance and the season felt like it and last night on the decision to throw to chase Claypool in a double team, that on all three of those drives

to a anti-reqhil screwed something up. Your stars instead of winning the games at the end, did the very opposite of that. And you talk about Josh Allen and the way that he runs, he gave you the game you need to have from him to beat them. He had three turnovers. He made two very bad decisions. But he also made like half a dozen plays that no one else in the league can make. Yes, but he was 30 of 38s. You lost to a quarterback who turned the ball over three times to God.

And if you look at what's happened to their offense, since Kendorsi was fired, they are worse in every way except turnovers. And I don't think they've got the turnovers fixed. I don't think you can fix the turnovers with him. You can get lucky on occasion. But that's the game you need Josh Allen to play in order to beat them. Correct, and Adolfo's got it last night.

Just, you could, have it be a worse game. I mean, their defense was injured, you got to. He could have thrown five yard passes for the entire night, the same way that he did last year when they came here and lost. He could have completed 30 of 38 of five yard passes, but he was throwing the ball down the field. He was running. He turned the ball over three times.

All you need is your quarterback, not two. You didn't even need two. They could have won that game last night. Without. To a throwing over 200 yards. They could have won that game last night with to a just being game manager, but to a also turn the ball over to a Josh Allen produced as many touchdowns as each other in that game for all the yardage that Josh Allen had.

Buffalo one because they got a special teams touchdown. Right, but well, I don't have to touchdown passes to a head had one understood, but what I'm saying is the dolphins had 14 points in touchdowns from their offense. The bills had 14 points in touchdowns from from their offense. All you need to what to do in that circumstance to beat Josh Allen is not turn the ball over or at the end of the game just here go tie it at the end. But instead he gave you the turnover at the end. When the ball bounces off Van Ginkels helmet and ends in a insane touchdown catch, it's just not your night. I feel like right. Like we could all just agree it just wasn't the

dolphins night. How happy were you Jessica because I believe that the dolphin season has been giving you gifts this last month, that this has been a wonderful holiday December for you that began with the watch party where you witnessed all of this was avoidable. All you had to do was hold on to a leave with that damn variable, but you can't do it. That game ended up mattering. Like it mattered. They needed to win that game. They all matter. They all matter, but that one definitely mattered. They had a two-tap two-sport lead

in the late- and the fourth quarters, you guys. I just think like from my standpoint of, I wrote off a lot of teams midway through the season. We'll get to my top five. Let's do it right now. No, I'm not ready. I'm not ready.

I'm not ready. Top five teams you wrote off? Yes, that are in the playoffs. That's a good list. But I'm not ready. One of those teams is the Steelers and now they're at the seventh seed and the dolphins are only the sixth seed and you all have to Roof for the Steelers to win so that you don't have to play Baltimore if you somehow pull off a win. So there's four others. We assume the Browns are probably one of those teams. She's not ready. She wasn't ready yet. That's her last billion. The problem around here that often happens is that people want to get shots off,

and then we say we'll get to it later, and very often we don't get to it later. For example, Chris Cody was desperate yesterday during the watch party. We had three hours of sprawling space. The bucket ears have to be on the list. He's coming to the box. And the Texans.

Oh, wow. Teams, what is the list? Is it Teams You've Road Off? She's not ready yet. I know she's not ready, but she knows what the list is. Thank you, Bill. I want to guess it. Teams You Road Off halfway through the season.

Is that what the list is? Or Teams You? That are now in the playoffs. That are now in the season. Is that what the list is or teams you better now in the playoffs? That are now in the playoffs. I do. Seasons greetings everybody. It is Mike Ryan here to talk to you about Miller Lite, but also here to talk to you about this festive season and how Miller time can make holiday time even better.

I love this winter weather. It's great excuse to go outside and toast some wonderful memories with some friends. Why don't you do that with an ice cold Miller light in your hand. And in some parts of the country, you don't need a coosie. It just stays cold out there. How wonderful is that? Take a sip, my friends. Look around. Reflect on your year. You made a lot of good calls and no call better than having this Miller light right now. A beer that is brewed for taste. You know, it's triple hops brewed. They could have stopped brewing it twice with hops, but they didn't. They went that extra mile and they brewed it with hops three times. The original light beer since 1975 and still the best one I'm talking about

Miller light. Great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller light.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Taste like Miller time celebrate responsibly Miller brewing company Milwaukee Wisconsin 96 calories and beer. Tastes like Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly, Miller Brewing Company Milwaukee Wisconsin 96 Scaleries and 3.2 Carbs per 12 ounces. Don Lebertard. T-Mates cans shoot from three. Now they're gonna see a different Jimmy. Now he's just just playing. Nickelback in the locker room and still gots.

They'll play D and shoot threes as they chase the nets for the sick seed These five words in his head It's me my way winning games yet This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats Last night Chris Cody wanted in a 3.3 and a half hour window to get off what he thought was going to make a be career making sound. The coaching carousel that he says he has invented as a producer here at Metal Arc Media who wants to be climbing in the industry.

He's got a coaching carousel sound. How has Mike felt about it? As you try to show off your executive producer skills to Mike Ryan, how has this gone with the approval process? I'm not sure how Mike feels about it. He's giving me a couple noises. But the way I envision this,

we start talking about coaching changes. We hit the music, and we all bounce like Rana Carousel. Huh? See what I'm doing right here? I mean, it's a lot better with the music. All right, so if I bring up Arthur Smith, for example, and how is... Come on, everyone.

And so we should talk about Arthur Smith like this, how his Falcons career ended with his last act being yelling at Dennis Allen for scoring too much against him. This is hard to do. Yeah. Did you hear James Winston explain that thing away? We've got great sound of James Winston that we will get to momentarily,

but you want to do this every time. It's kind of like, so it's so, so should this be the sound with Bella check because Bella check. Oh, it gets louder with Bella check. I have a hot take. It feels like I have a hot take. Bella checks not going anywhere. It's all noise.

Well, but they'll be back. I have going everywhere. I could see him as a ticket tigger for carousels. You think so? I've got him being I be I've got him fixing some of the carnival rides. I think he's someone who's not a public facing employee for the carnival. He's somebody who works in the shadows has black grit on his hands. Hilly's horse isn't working.

That every carousel has one. You get on it and you're like, like that one, that one's lightning. And then you say, I ain in the sled. I'm just you guys can be on the bus. So comfy, stationary sled. Put it on the pole, please, juju. Does every carousel have one horse that's not working? And you don't know until it starts too. We already cover it. Yeah, but we've got plenty to do here. Coaching carousel stuff. We've got plenty of ground that can be covered Ron Rivera Yeah, so you just let the conversation take you where will and we'll just hit this music anytime you're playing the game

Okay, so at any time that we're playing the coaching carousel game because to gots all he wants to do is play the bellicic game It's a fun game then Of what happens if bellicic calls your franchise today looking for a job Yeah, the ending yesterday's to got four bill bellicic calls your franchise today looking for a job? Yeah. The ending yesterday's to got four Bill Bellicic. If this is how it ends as the Patriots coach, I think his should be so loud that you can't even hear what I'm saying. Well, a check finishing up Stugatts by losing to the New York Jets. Yep. And leaving the field in a way that suggested he didn't want to be seen by human beings.

So, he was covering up his face, he did not want to be, I believe he knows because he's so close to historic stuff that he didn't want to be photographed by the New York tabloids running off the field after losing to the Jets and having his face be something that could be seen on the tabloids.

I believe he comes from a time where he knows enough to just pull up. He wasn't cold. He just didn't want his face photographed on that on that field. Well, this is a ring video camera. Like, if it's a ring video doorbell, they'll catch her. It's smart though. Would you not agree that Bella check pull first of all Bella check wearing Clothing that allows him to pull something over the entirety of his face. He had he play it is

He doesn't want to be photographed leaving that field for the last time as a legend possibly for the last time his Patriots coach and give the newspaper photographers old school Patriots coach and give the newspaper photographers, old school newspaper photographers, he does not want to give them the ammunition of you can see my face. So you get rock bottom being Bill Belichick hiding his face, ashamed to show his face leaving the field. What do you do with all of what's happening in New England when that guy's excellence can evaporate that quickly because it's that quickly. Stu got to know the credit to Brady. That's what I do.

Okay, but you okay. I'm not saying he's not a good head coach. I'm not even saying he's not a great head coach. He obviously is. Okay. He's done more winning than just about any head coach in the history of the NFL. But the quarterback is the most important position in sports. And if you have a good quarterback,

you will therefore be a great coach. If you don't have one of those guys, you're not gonna be a good coach. It's that simple. For me, at least, it is that simple. Andy Reed became a great coach. He was always a good coach. He was a good coach in Philadelphia.

He became great when he got Patrick Mahol. It's not that simple when you you're, you know, you're winning in the margins and everyone has a great quarterback that you're playing against late in the season. Why can we apply the perspective that will probably have about this in like five years time? I know we always want to rush to a take. But ironically enough, it was Tom Brady's view on his marriage with Giselle. That kind of changed my perspective on these things because when you get a divorce, people say your marriage failed. And they were quick to say, no, we had a very successful marriage.

It was part of the greatest times of our lives. We have these beautiful children. We're intertwined in each other's lives. And I think that in New England. But it's now. It's the exit. It's what does a legend deserve at the end? I don't know.

Just reign it its course. Didn't it? Like, I think he positioned well to be successful outside of there. Probably will be as a great coach. I think it's time for a fresh start. He's been there for, what, 25 years? It's a really long time to be doing anything.

But Mike, the problem is when they got divorced, Brady won a Super Bowl. And so people look at it a little bit differently, but if I'm bellowed checked in, I would wait around and see which jobs are going to come open because there might be some great jobs that become open Jerry Jones said he is taking this game by game with Mike McCartes. Jake Glazer told us that the market for Bill Bellicie isn't necessarily what you're

imagining it might be. He reported yesterday as well that it is over in new england for bellicic glazer did uh... you just use unmitigated with success i've never heard it used with success i've always been unmitigated disaster only heard it used with disaster but stugatz when you say it's that simple tom brady you have tom brady you win it wasn't that long ago that mVeigh was the toast of the sport. And Bella check held him and golf to three points in a Super Bowl where Brady only scored

13 points in that Super Bowl. So you say it's that simple that if you have a great quarterback, but in that game, his quarterback was not great. And Bella, Bella check one the Super Bowl by being able to contain Sean McVeigh who couldn't do anything when he didn't have Todd Gurley. I'm not saying, I don't think Mike is saying that he's not a good coach or a great coach.

He is, and all things being equal, I would want that guy to be Mike. And in fact, it wasn't that long ago that Mac Jones was doing the gritty into the end zone at a proble. I know that the proble is mitigated, but I mean, it's just you can't be winning with Bailey's happy. Everyone knows what happened.

There he made some bad hires. All right, guys, go ahead and put on the screen. The ring camera of Bella checked the audio, leaving the Patriots facility for the final time. Done, Lebatard. All these high-paid analogies. I don't want to mention names. TNT. ESPM. You know, they can look at it. They're not going to make it, you know, even if they win in If they lose it in Miami, they calm you down. I know They're losing Miami. I don't got a chance in Boston. Oh, they're going to have their ass, you know, what? They're in Boston, you know, two guts. They went wrong. They were are they going to lose a job? No, are they going to get a cutting-paint? No, what are they going to do? Keep predicting what is the obvious. They're going to say, oh, the nuggets are going to win.

Oh, Denver, the altitude. And you know what? The heat are going to win it all. This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stu Gats. Taylor told me a story when I came in today about an embarrassment that he had that he called his greatest embarrassment as a human being in which he accidentally texted University of North Carolina basketball coach Roy Williams an assortment of replacements that he thought should replace Roy Williams when he retired because he should retire. He didn't mean to send that directly to Roy Williams.

He also didn't mean for that story to make air. Yeah, he mentioned that. Oh, I didn't hear that on the front end. I didn't even hear that. I didn't even hear that voice. How could be? I didn't hear that. I didn't even hear that. I didn't even hear that. Yes. How could be? I didn't hear it. Leaky faucet. I. He has Roy's number. Can you guys help him? By the way, respond. Can you? Can you guys help? We tried. We said, don't look at Dan and the eyes. Don't talk to him. And he broke that rule. So he had it coming. I thought of it though, because something like that happened to me yesterday, I have in my phone, Stephanie from a Mexican restaurant. And so I ended up ordering tacos of fajita

and margaritas from Stephen A. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Mexican, that's great catch. There's no, there's no, hey, that's just, that's what, that was the order in my phone. So you just have someone named Stephanie on call and everyone ordered Mexican food. That's right. Okay. I mean, it happened to me. I've told you this story before,

but Abby told me to get a foot massage and I finally did and I'm sitting in the chair getting said foot massage and I texted to her. I thought it was her. This is better than sex. I sent it to Alden Smith. It is. It's a great story.

But Jessica has completed her top five list of teams that she wrote off in the middle of the season. And Stugots believes he has your list. Is this in order? Stugots, do you have yours ranked in the same order that season. And Stugatz believes he has your list. Is this in order, Stugatz, do you have yours ranked in the same order that you think the Chesakas will be in? I didn't go order. I just put down the five teams, I think, will be on this list.

Would you like me to put them in order? Well, yes, put them in order. And we'll get to them in a second. But in the interim, I will filibuster for you by showing a viral video from this weekend that I cannot explain of a small person being stuck in what appears to be a vase, a hotel vase of some sort, but it's not a little person It's just someone who's not that big in a, you know, a sizable vase that That's not an urn, right?

That's not, that's a hotel vase and there's a cacophony. This is so humiliating. What? I don't know how he got stuck in. I took my belt off and didn't do shit. Alabama's gonna take in the Rose Bowl last pretty hard. You can do it, you can do it, you can do it. You can do it, you really can.

It's humiliating enough. These are humiliating. To just get stuck in a vase or an urn. It's all the more humiliating when you're surrounded by people who are having drinks and talking to loudly because they're having drinks and you're stuck and you can't wriggle your way out of the hotel vase. Sweaty's what's in the lane. The sweat is what's in the way. I'm with him. You gotta just dump this thing upside down.

I'm with this old guy. He's like, we gotta get this thing upside down. Right. He is furious. He shouldn't be furious. Why is he yelling because he's trying to help? He's embarrassed. That is a small space for, he doesn't, like, that looks like a lot of leg going on in there. What is the backstory on how he got stuck in there? You was drinking. Okay. Genuinely, I don't know. I saw this on Twitter yesterday.

And there was one video where there is a woman who goes, his knees are stuck at the bottom or something like that. It seems, I've gotten stuck in the seat belt before. It's very scary being stuck in something where you think someone's going to have to rescue you with scissors or like a hammer or a knife, machete you out.

Stuck in seatbelt. Yeah, like you get like twisted up in a seatbelt and then you can't get out and then it like, you know how the seatbelt constricts. It's a wall to touch, right? Yeah, and you can't pull out more slack. Yeah, that's happened to me a few times. I was at Lego land and I got stuck in the roller,

like one of these little crappy kid roller coasters, like afterwards mine was like, the things pop up and you get off and mine didn't pop up and it like caused like a 10 or 15 minute delay where they had to close down the ride and it felt like a fat thing. And I'm just like, and I like even asked the guy, I'm like, is this a fat thing?

Like does this like, and he's like, no, this is just a rant and I'm like trying to like, it was one of those things where everyone's like looking like, why is it stopped? There's a guy, and it was just so embarrassing. And they had nothing to do with anything I did. And I was just like, looking around like, this isn't a fat thing. It's just got stuck, it's random.

It is insecurities on display. That's why he was so rabidly angry is because, really, all of you are just gonna mock the fact that I can't get out of a vase and he's thinking to himself, surely, this is gonna go viral. Somebody, somebody's gonna take my shame here and send it to everyone.

I can't believe that that happened to PTI producer Matt Kelleyhurt. But if I'm trying to help you and you're yelling at me, I'm leaving you in the vase. You're gonna stop me. Don't yell at me when I'm trying to help you. We've got a face person Matt Sullivan. Find that guy. Let's get him on. That is a good that I hope he's so in the place. I do too. He was so rude to everyone. They're just trying to help him right. Apparently they had to chisel him out. I read I don't know the I genuinely have I try have tried to find actual reporting on this It's as you can imagine very difficult to find it would be funny if the crowd got fed up with him and like all right You're upset we're leaving you know he's just like guys come back. No even worse. I would stand him up so he can't even roll

He tries to roll uh-huh There you go buddy enjoy the nup shools It was that a wedding I couldn't tell was that it looked like it I still do want to know though. I understand your quick explanations the correct one drinking was involved But what was the thinking process of Like what was the wacky thing that was going to be done successfully? I want to scare someone I'll hop in and get low and pop out and then came you should do that thing that you did a couple of years ago. Be great.

What if he was a genie? And he got stuck halfway. Yeah. And the world's crappiest genie. Yeah. Before he was able, yes, thank you. Thank you to the crack crew who has put now Matt Keller her on The screen so that people could say it can see how hugely embarrassing should be by having gotten stuck in that

In that vase are you ready Jessica to do your top five? Should we do Stu gots this top five first and then my or should we do them like side by side? I Don't know because I think they're all to be the same and I just think they're going to be in a different order. So I am for a team. My list is pretty good. Yeah, but so is his and I don't. Well, I guess we'll find out together. You go. Well, I don't think I can say who he has at five. If it's not the same that you have as five. She has to give her five then you give what I wrote to you. Let's just do it. Let's do it., and two, three? Let's just do it. Yeah, let's do it. When she does, it's on Stu's list.

OK. Steve Martin. Number five, the Ravens. Not anywhere else. Not anywhere on Stu's list. You wrote off the Ravens? Well, in week five, they lost to the Steelers. They actually lost both games against the Steelers this year.

In that game, I think the final is 17 to 10. None of the receivers could cut to pass. It was a brutal game to watch. So I said, right, not the Ravens for us this season. Look at this. This is gonna be the theme, right? Anyone who loses to the Steelers, it's, oh, I'm sorry. I ruined it.

I'm sorry. It came out of the gate strong of the Ravens. And I revised mine. What if the Steelers are on the list? Number four. The Packer. That's his number four. Number four.

Nice. All right. Well, they were two and five at one point. And then they had a four game losing streak. They also lost the Steelers in week nine. This is incredible. 40 years. I've been a jet fan waiting for a good quarterback.

The Packers are about to have their third consecutive decade of Having a good quarterback Jordan loves really good. That's correct Jesus number. I don't know if he's as good as the really good or just good He had 32 touchdowns at 11 intersub I think he's just good Well either way he's probably on the path to opening up his own freedom pack given how the previous two went they They have a very good offensive line to which helps number three number three the rams that's a number three oh my gosh all right well we're two for three right now still the rams

uh... they were at also a three game losing streak the season and they'll actually lost in week seven to the steeler uh... like excited rams lines actually lost in week seven to the Steelers. Uh, they were done. Michael, you excited? Rams Lions? I'm excited. That's a great one. That's a great one. You're going to ask me if I was excited for something else, which I'm not at all.

What if Stafford wins the first Lions postseason game in 30 years? His first game in Detroit, right? Playoff game. You thought he was going to ask you if you're excited about the Browns. Are they in? Number two. two number two the Buckingeers big like quarterback issue in the preseason they actually lost to the Steelers preseason week one it was a Kyle Trask Baker may field off so the Bucks I wrote them off and number one one, the stealer. They lost in week one, 30 to seven to the 49ers.

I wrote them off. They've had three different quarterbacks this season. TJ, what is now probably not going to play? I don't really know what his status is, but he heard his knee against the Ravens on Saturday. But Mike Tomlin, 10 wins, 10 win season for the stealers. They're in the playoffs as a seven seed. Stugots also had the Texans number two and the Bucks number one.

They beat the Steelers. Yeah. The Texans. The Texans. Yes. So not on the list. Right. But the Bucks, he had the Bucks number one.

He did not have the Steelers, but I think most of us wrote the Steelers off. And now most of us expect nothing from the Steelers in the playoffs. Pretty cool story that with Baker Mayfield, right? Yes. The box. Yes. Like a great story. He has reinvented himself there after Cleveland chewed him up and the physical.

He found a crappy division. I mean, what do we have? I mean, yeah, he did. He's coming off of putting up three field goals in Carolina, but I'm I'm a bum. I'm a bum. He's a bum. And a bum. Ribs apparently. He's alwaysmer. He's a bummer. He's a bummer. He's a bummer. He's a bummer.

He's always hurt. He's one of the toughest quarterback. You have bum ribs. I just don't like the narrative, though, like that yesterday Todd Bowles gets to be in that locker room, like he's a king, and you just play in a crappy division. And then guys like the dolphins, the Eagles, with better records are feeling like,

I'm just saying it's not fair. A lot of people's booze in crap like fair. Mike's with me. Give me one division 15 teams on each side. It's a really bad. Let's go Europe with this. That division is as bad as the AFC North is good, but I think in this run, if you look at the type of football that the Packers have played lately, the performance at Tampa had in Green Bay, propelled them to this position, hosting a playoff game.

And that was a game they scored 34 points in, correct? And Baker Mayfield has had some extraordinary games this season. And Stugantz, like I really don't think that we cover nearly well enough how hard it must be to play that particular game and position if physically your body is something less than a hundred percent. Right. Trevor Lawrence, that was not professional quarterback play in a game that I expected a quarterback who's a number one pick overall to win that football game against the Tennessee team that didn't have anything to play for, but they're beloved but Brabel. I mean, that's what the Titans do, Dan.

But Trevor Lawrence clearly isn't physically right. What's the last six weeks of the season? We can have a conversation about whether Trevor Lawrence is as good as he should be or not. He's nuts. But this incarnation, the last six weeks of Trevor Lawrence trying to get on the field through an assortment of stuff while other quarterbacks simply can't get on the field, Baker may feel willingness to play all of the football games and be available is enough in that division to win the division.

On the other side of the injury argument though, you got Tyree Kill who's had a bad ankle injury quote-unquote for weeks did a backflip after his touchdown last night. So it's like, I don't know. I mean, pain killers can do crazy things. That is correct, but I would say the positions are different on how it is, you know. And it's cyclical because that offensive line for Jackson

was so bad it's a reason that he got hurt and it's the reason why he had trouble getting healthy as a season progressed just along the offensive and defensive line. And give me a mind. They have a former number one overall pick and trade-on walker on that defensive line. They've just, they screwed the pooch. And it makes it so that you can't even make a proper evaluation on the type of quarterback Trevor Lawrence can be. Is he the guy that we saw at the end of last year? Or is he this guy now?

But that's what happened to that's what happened to mainfield in Cleveland. Yes. You stopped with the evaluating, but his body was breaking.