The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: The Mark Of A Raptor

Episode Date: August 27, 2025

The crew revisits Greg’s anger from yesterday in an effort to spoil where the Dolphins land in his NFL team rankings. Then, it’s time for the Suey Awards category of Best Story before diving into Billy’s professional misery. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Oh, hey, I'm just sipping Tim's all-new protein ice latte. Starting at 17 grams per medium latte, Tim's new protein lattes. Protein without all the work. At participating restaurants in Canada. Billy, what is your degree of confidence in Greg Cody executing this new,

introduction today correctly? Two for two so far. So you would think, you know, he's got the reps in. He should be able to do it. But is this a regression to the mean type situation? You know, and now he's flying a little too close to the sun and he thinks he's too good. And then all of a sudden, and yesterday we threw him off a little bit. I say we politely.

Yesterday, you guys are very, very rude to Greg. Very rude to Greg. Well, we'll get to that in a moment because I, I, I, I, was just howling with laughter last night at his just general indignance and how he forgot he was doing show to just yell at us and yell at his son in a way that made us all feel like we were being yelled at as five-year-olds by our own father. I shrank. I shrank. I've never really experienced that from a father before. But yesterday was a real masterclass and you shit-stirring. Yeah, it wasn't good. And I think this whole just like paint over everything with a broad

brush of its show like if you murder someone today and you're like when it was just for show I don't think that works with the police you know so he might be thrown in this intro is what I'm getting when I was in it I wasn't blaming Dan as much but I watched it back and there was a point about 20 seconds in where I'm like you know what

I'm gonna give him back to him was it the seven times that we tried to diffuse the situation and Dan said hold up wait stop yes that's exactly what happened but we've gotten two really good Greg Cody days That introduction, the best version of Greg Cody there is is when you challenge him to sing. Like, there have only been a couple of times that we have done it on this show where we are

performing around him. What we did in Vegas, I thought was a miracle, but was also Greg Cody caring the most. He hasn't written them back in my day and I don't know how long, but you let him perform a song. It's nuts. Roy, you have to be a little bit confused by the singing sports writer here. Do you not like the singing sports writer is the best version of himself. at 70 when doing something that's flamboyantly musical. It's not just that it's a little bit of crooning. It's performance art of I get to sing and dance. I'm a singing dance man.

If he knows that's what he's best at, why he's not doing it more often? Is he best at it? He's just solid at it, I'd say. What, like a B plus? He's good. I don't want to undercut him. His singing is genuinely good.

But Chris, if you'd like to try to recreate that, because what he did had a degree of difficulty on it. Two days in a row, he has nailed it. And there's a degree of difficulty on getting all the songs right, all the movements right, throwing the toilet paper over your shoulder correctly, throwing the bacon over your shoulder correctly, sitting in front of the camera in a place that allows Carl to hide behind him in a perfectly comedic fashion. I don't know that we can execute all of that correctly again and again. I mean, yesterday, the wardrobe change, Rinkle 2. He navigated that so smoothly. Because he's getting better as a performer, I think. And

And performers know how to do wardrobe changes. I believe he's got a little Celian D on in him. I mean, that was a diva outburst yesterday, even though I stirred it. Hold on a second. That was not a diva outburst. He was a victim. Billy, let's remember what we're arguing about here. Like, there is no reason for any, that is disproportionate.

You sold the man's laptop. Yeah, I mean, crime was committed, and then you put in jeopardy his livelihood. as he told us. No one takes that list more seriously than Greg Cody, and you guys had no respect for said lords. The fact. The part that I like the best was that he was saying, like, you're my livelihood here,

as if the Herald would give a shit about us. Like, we drew more attention to that. The Herald loved what we did yesterday. You being dismissive of his career is exactly why we were in that spot yesterday. I would also be very careful with how you're painting the Great Miami Herald with a broad brush because you're to say that anything

that gets them eyes they love. So you're implying that they love when people are murdered. If you go to the Herald and you're like, well, look at all the eyes we're getting on this murder story, which more people would get murdered. You think that's what the Miami Herald is hoping for? Murder in the streets. Put it on the poll, Jujua

at Lebitard show. Is the Miami Herald you said it? Is the Miami Herald rooting for murder? Let's see if Greg Cody can do this again. It's time to put on a suit and roll out the carpet Break up the tube and gather near It's the best time of the year

So keep your dial right here It's me and you and me again The greatest of lives The greatest of life's mistakes And best revelations And so much more Brought you buy the greatest beer It's the best time of the year

So keep your dial right here It's me and you And me again at the sooes And every day you're going to go to a website To vote on the sounds that brought you cheer Because it's the best time of the year So keep your dial right here It's me and you

It's me again and it's you It's me and you and me again at the sui That kind of thing It's tough to do It's difficult to do Blacked out what happened And Greg Cody If you were not watching or

listening yesterday, I could argue that it's the angriest moment in the history of sports broadcasting. I could make that argument. Where else? Where else have you ever seen someone rabidly refused to do any more show and threaten his son and threaten all of them? I saw Jim Everett slap Jim Rome once. A good point by you. Greg got older today, huh? And I want to play for the audience. Everybody, look how good I look. The context, you're breathless, you're winded. A performer. I want to play for everybody, again, if you did not see it yesterday.

And we've got a giant college football weekend this weekend. One of the biggest openings you will ever see. FI.U. Bethune. To a season, right there, opening week. I just can't remember a time where there was something like this on an Archmanning where he could really become, he could go from star to Super Bowl. superstar one game. He can do it that quickly. Like he's somebody whose name you know, and in one game he could become the immediate frontrunner

for everything in college football, or it could fall apart. And that's one of the games. You got Miami Notre Dame. We haven't talked about that yet. But I want to start with what I believe to be close to unprecedented anger, and here's just a smidgen of it, because it was about seven minutes, but here's one minute of it. We've got to find a second. Oh, no! They're going to be elbows grabbed. They're going to be elbows grabbed.

He's furious. Don't say anything about it. I'm serious. I want my laptop back. I'm not the least bit amused by this. I'm not kidding in how angry I am. I'm going to send them both to the penalty box. I'm not going to the penalty box.

Go together. I'll bring this. I want my computer right here before I do anything. No, I'm not going to the penalty box until I get my computer right here. You can bring it to me. This is fine. This is good... No, you can bring it to me.

Craig, you're going to stop that now. No. Yes, no, I'm not. You're going to stop that now. No, no, I'm not. I'll leave. I'll go home if you want me to with my laptop. But I am not going in the penalty box until my laptop is connected to my computer.

My son is not your fault. My son has gone over the line here. I am genuinely upset. We know. Okay. So how about make it right? Christopher, if I don't have that computer here in three minutes, I am not hosting the draft party Thursday,

night. Put the clock up on the screen. Louis. Please do it. I cannot express you how serious I am about Thursday night. Don't hold your heart, all right? Yeah, I'm scared me. No. On my life, I am not hosting this draft party Thursday night. I've never been more angry connected with this show. Anybody who thinks that's me is an idiot. On my granddaughter's life, on my granddaughter's life, I am not hosting this

draft party unless I have that computer. Whatever number he said will not be where the dogs are in the room. Wait a minute. Oh, wait. Now the number's changing? Maybe. Oh, no. Depending on how accurate he was.

That was crazy. I just love him at the beginning of that. I want my laptop back. The next to last time that he was yelling at you, it's how I've heard him yell at you since you were five when he's angriest. He did not care that you're the executive producer. He did not care that he is sitting. here and doing it a show. The backstory on this before I get to other things here, I just want

you guys to know, the audience to know, that Chris Cody, just this morning was still on the phone with his dad, who was still screaming, my ranking of the Dolphins comes out at 10 a.m. Eastern. And if you guys break that story before me, there's no draft party on the third. Thursday night I'm hosting. Whoa, hold on a second. I don't know if you're aware. I'm a journalist. All right. And I have sources. I break stories sometimes. Greg doesn't get to tell me what stories I could attempt to break. Dude, you're going to kill me. But listen, this is my integrity. This is my livelihood we're talking about here. Greg doesn't get to tell me what stories to break or not break. If I have some, if I have a source who's going to tell

me, you know, what rank in the Dolphins are before 10 a.m. Lord's time zone, Eastern time, everybody knows that. Well, nothing's stopping me from doing my job. Put it on the poll, please, Juju. Is the Eastern Time Zone, the Lord's Time Zone, does everyone know that? Chris, what is your description for the audience of what you endured this morning while talking to your dad again about trying to get a graphics package together that celebrates where he will rank the dolphins. And I'm telling you from just knowing your dad, the place that he was angriest, and this was lost yesterday, is that because you said he would rank the dolphins 14th off of the top, he thought you had already looked at his computer. That was the, you're right.

That was the biggest confusion. Whoa. That's correct. Are we spoiling here? I haven't confirmed that Yeah, yeah. Okay, thank you. I'm waiting on your word here, Zaz. We will get it from the journalist, but is it lost on everyone here? How amusing it is that Greg Cody thought it was okay to reveal to the world before my wife did that I was engaged. That is okay as a scoop. But us reporting what his ranking of the dolphins is to do that to him, that is unacceptable and results in a rage not seen. since Chris Everett, since Jim Everett went after Jim Rome. Careful, that was a problem. For calling him Chris Everett. Well, I think it depends on a number of factors, okay?

When you told Greg, I'm engaged. Do you say off the record? I didn't say it to him. I wasn't his source. Well, when someone said it to him, did they say off the record? Because if they said off the record and he put it out there, then he did, then there was malfeasance. Now, there's a difference between that and him reporting news that was not off the record

and someone stealing his personal property and then stealing his intellectual information, his IP, and putting that out there before him. That's a crime. Chris should go to jail. Wow. No, I shouldn't. Good defense.

It's up to the judge. Luckily, we have a judge here. It's up to the judge. Should Chris go to jail for his actions yesterday? You made a good case. Should I be a judge here? Roy, do you have the imaging ready for Zaslo to be a judge? you're always a judge.

You're just asking if you should be a judge publicly. Well, today so far I'm a performer. Well, but you're a lot of things. And again, you're a man of many talents. A damn good performer today, yeah. All right. All rise, the Honorable Jonathan Zaslow, now presiding with prejudice. That's not a judge's.

Oh, it is a judge. It is a judge, tread. We didn't think about the headphones part. I can't believe he kept the backwards. flex fit on the no helmet makes it a little you know the the no headphones makes a little right yeah yeah all right the case in front of me should chris cody go to prison jail based on the evidence that the defense put in front of me which was no i shouldn't i side with the defense oh wow chris cody does not deserve

prison. With prejudice. Forgivable. Congratulations. Congratulations, Chris. I'm very happy for you. You do not get a prison sentence, but we do have still the problem of your father's wrath, which is real. Billy, Mike, you guys tell me what you experienced watching Chris say nine times in a telephone. Dad, we're not going to put it on the screen before 10 a.m. No, I wasn't really paying attention to that.

I shrank to the kitchen because yesterday was genuinely uncomfortable for me. It was not having fun. That was very uncomfortable. For many in our audience. I was having fun. I like, because I just know my dad when he gets that level of rage. And after the show, he does the thing. I think I said it on air yesterday.

He does the rage a couple hours later. He's like, maybe I overreacted. And then he says that. And then right after that, he's like, but do not reveal that pick before 10. So it's like he apologizes for the rage, and then he says, I'm going to be that angry if you report it before 10. He grabbed his chest yesterday. Like, we're getting to the eight, and he's had incidents where he's just collapsed, like, at highlight. Like, it was getting a little scary how angry he was getting.

Well, it doesn't matter if it's because of asthma or whatever. If you pulling a prank kills your father, I'm with you. How are you going to feel? I did think watching it back yesterday that when I saw how angry he was, I was like, this just can't be good for his health. Over. don't forget, over what's inevitably going to a mediocre dolphin. Thank you. Maybe we don't know yet.

Okay, Billy, but here's, I want to take the guesses and I want to walk people through this. Okay, and I'll promise, I'll get to the games in a second because I am excited about this. You I'm Notre Dame game and I'm excited about this college football weekend. But I really do want the audience to understand that I believe this anger started with his son correctly guessing off the top of his head. that Cody had ranked the team 14th in the league because I said there's no way he goes under 16. He's a homer. He will keep them in the top half of the league.

Chris got it correct and his father thought that he had looked at the computer. Well, what was the timeline there? When did you say that? You can see, there was a video montage that we cut it out of the one we played, but you can see, I say it before I had the laptop. There's me saying 14 wins

and then they cut to me going in there and grabbing the laptop. Do we know it's 14? for sure. Well, this is what I want to talk about because... Not confirmed. Well, it's not confirmed by Zazzo, but this is what I'm telling you. What I'm saying is, oh, it was 14, but it won't be today. He'll move it, and it won't have anything

to do with merit or somebody injured or anything else. He's just going to move it because he doesn't want his son to be right. Do you want to know a behind the scenes thing that I don't think you're aware of because you were in that studio when this was going on? So, when Chris was back here with the laptop, and we were kind

of uncomfortable with what was going on, Chris had the laptop, and he said, I can't find it. And then he's hitting every single tab that's open. He's hitting every single tab that's open at the time. And Greg was actively typing it out moments before. And he said, oh, gosh, I hope I didn't close it. And if I did, I hope it was saved. So while you guys are kind of egging Greg on, we back here are like,

well, there's a chance that he accidentally deleted all of the work that Greg had done. He said that. But Greg wasn't worried about that because all 40 of those tabs were his podcast that he was opened on. He was just checking how many downloads it had. It was. And I'm promising you, I'd like to take a bet here now, okay? Because I think we'll find out at 10 or if Zaslow breaks the story earlier. I imagine we'll find out before. Really? Well, you know, this isn't a hobby of mine. Come on. You're predicting that in the next 47 minutes, you can get this story, this big story of where it is, the dolphins are going to be

ranked according to Greg Cody of the Miami Herald. Yeah. I mean, I'm not exactly. trying to, you know, crack some kind of code here. I'll figure it out. All right. His rage is indeed real, but Erlene, Chris's mom can tell you that that's what every experience is like arguing with your father, Chris, where there's an apology, but he doesn't know what he's apologizing for, and he's still right the next day, and he wasn't actually that sorry, but he did overreact. And that's like dozens of times in my life. And so I reject what all of you are saying here, all of you. I reject all of it because I am last night with my wife watching that video and we are howling with laughter. Oh, so she loved it. Loved it because it was

uproariously funny because he's cute and everyone knows. Everyone in our audience knows. It's unlike any other television fight you're ever going to have. Everyone in our audience knows, oh, that's real, and it also doesn't actually mean anything because those people love each other. Like, they'll figure out whatever the end of that is, if he doesn't die on the air. But there's that, too, right? There's the, if he doesn't die on air.

That's the part we want to avoid. And also just the assumption of like, ah, we'll misbehave, but we'll probably figure it out at the end. Like, we could avoid that part in the middle, and then you don't have to maybe mend fences. You know the best fence? One that doesn't have to be mended.

Why didn't you tell me that advice while we were at ESPN? Listen, there was no one stopping that. That fence was well, Yon Broken. You were a bucking Bronco, and there was nothing stopping you. Yep, you wouldn't listen to anybody. Not a single person. I tried to stop you.

You sent me to the penalty box, and then everything went downhill from there. It's one of the best stories in the history of the show. I believe it's the best video in the history of the show, Billy looking around. I know. I know why you don't like it, but that's not the best story I want to show the... It's my wedding week. I needed less stress that week. you have to find that for me so that we can just relive that at some point here, please. Just Billy's awkward looking around.

I do it every night when I close my eyes. I know. It was a bit of a nightmare. But the best story of the last year, this is a difficult category to edit down in the sueyes every year because a lot of great stories get told around here. They are long stories. But Chris Cody told me this is a tight, tight 15 minutes. You get to decide.

be you get to decide what were the best story and stories told over the last year on the show the 2025 sui awards is presented by miller light cash your vote at levitard a f dot com winners will be announced next week tuesday september 2nd hey it's mike ryan you hear the excitement in my voice the nascar playoffs are here it all starts with a true classic the southern 500 at darlington raceway going down this sunday at six p m eastern on u.s say. Darlington is one of the oldest, toughest, and most unforgiving tracks on the schedule. They don't call it too tough to tame for nothing, and the Southern 500 always delivers a test of skill, strategy, and survival. Looking to get in on the action? Draft Kings has the odds.

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Don Lebertard. Greg Cody of the Miami Herald is writing an article, and I'm reading in it. Moss Miami sold out. Miami artist, Miami culture. And I'm reading Moss Miami is sold out. And I'm reading about digital podcast network. And I'm reading about us. And I'm like, this is our dreams coming true.

Stugats. A thousand people come out, and we see the shipping container, and they're on a stage, and they're like rock stars. You and me both had tears in our eyes. We're like mom and dad of sentiment, and it's hard to get you to sentiment, man. That was a very emotional moment for us to see those guys. I'm telling you guys, you were on stage. Dan and I were both crying. Are you guys aware of this?

Crying. Like crocodile tears. No, crocodile tears are faked. Crocodile tears are fakes. I thought they meant big. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stoogads. Oh, geez, that is the pickle I had that ready for. We got pickles, dog.

Yeah, we got pickles. But here's Best Story on the Sueys. And now the Suey nominees for Best Story, Jamal Crawford's biggest loss in gambling. shooting dice with somebody I shouldn't have been shooting dice with. I got in over my head and I start air vetting. I don't know if you know what that means, but it's basically like I lost the cash I had. So then when I lost the cash, I was technically out the game.

So I had to bet on somebody else while they were shooting air money. And it got so deep instead of giving the cash, I said, I'd give my car. And I took my basketball out of the trunk and gave him the car. True story. And you were a rookie and what kind of car was? Yeah, I was a rookie. I was a rookie. It was a Mercedes.

It was a S-430. The Cody's almost got in a golf fight. I can wait to let those guys move. Chances are, I'm not going to hit them. So you know what? I'm going to speed this up. I'm going to hit. What do I do?

I hit the shot of my life. And there are two ways to run it up on people. You can land it 20 yards and it rolls into there. That's not as, you know, no one's really going to get hurt there. Or there's and the ball like lands and you're like, holy shit, I almost just died. That's what happened. It landed on the green. So I am like, I'm throwing up the international sign for, holy shit, I'm so sorry.

So the guy's reaction, on the green, he's like a young guy, my age, you know, looks like a tough guy. He grabs the ball, just chucks it into the water. Oh, no. What? He takes the ball. That's what I would do. And I just see the motion, just chucking it into the water. And I'm sitting here saying, look, what I just did was extremely rude.

Yeah. So I kind of get it. Greg Cody over here, 70-year-old Greg Cody, once he finds out the guy through my golf ball, puffs his chest out, and it's just like, I'm going to, like, I had to essentially hold my dad back. It's great. going to yell at this guy on my behalf, where then I would have had to be, like, defending my dad. Yes, that's how rage and family bonds work

so that someone gets killed and killed by a golf club on a golf court. Patrick Sartan, Jr. and senior tell the story of the Dolphins Broncos 70 to 20 game. Just for the record, by the end of the, about two minutes left in the third court, I was drunk. So I knew the score. But the thing about it, they were down, and Mike McDaniel kept through. on the ball. I'm like, oh, see, he's trying to break records on him, but.

Bad thing about it was, it was humid. It was hot. Yeah. We were getting a whoop in the sun. And it was, yeah, that was, your dad went to get drunk in the while you're suffering. In the club, you're allowing 70 points. And your dad is a hammered before the fourth quarter. I was watching. I was watching out of one eye. The story of how Jessica and Lehman met. My other grandma actually died. And then I went to work the next day and I was like my grandma died and everyone was like oh we're so sorry and I'm like it's okay let's go to happy hour and then we went to happy hour and that was the day Lehman and I started dating so much romance so that's how I remember our anniversary

Eduardo Perez was terrified his dad would see his shin guard the trainer for the angels comes out and beats our Tampa Bay trainer out to the field and he's like it's mush he goes let me let me look and I said don't and he goes what I said if it's much don't don't Don't raise my pant legs. Why? I said, because I have a shin guard underneath it. And my dad would always say the side of a bad hitter is a hitter that has a shing guard on. So I had a shingard underneath my uniform.

I'd not want my dad to see. While I'm torn Achilles, I had the shingard on. So I'm like, please do not show me that. He goes, okay, no problem. I'm not going to show you that. The Miami Heat had Poppy so scared he pulled his pants down. I was there and I was sitting on his couch with my gun. girlfriend and my father who got so nervous that while he was watching during all of that

for reasons i will not be able to explain to this day in the living room just dropped his pants and was standing there in his underwear he just got scared he was all he fans that was all of us his house but why do i why do i remember that because my father for some reason was in his tidy white he's just in the fourth quarter scared did you ever say dad why did you drop your pants we all did his house though great poor girlfriend wait you all dropped your pants. Jalen Rose texted Mero about his hairline. I was asked the question of

like, who do I think has fake hairlines? Because, you know, some people, like, Steve, that was when the cat was... I know where you're going with this. Right. I said, Jailen Rose. You're a lie? And I was just like, yo, devil is a liar. So I said it, right? So I said, yo, Jaylen Rose, his shit got to be fake because it's so, it's too perfect. It's not. It's too

perfect. So then I get a text. Yo, this is Jailon Rose. My shit's real. It's true. I mean, now we don't face it. Hators will say it's fake, Don't. But it's true. It is geometrical. Like, it's a modern marvel how it is perfect.

The 90-degree angles on it are crazy. Like, I'm talking about on TV. Jamal, you know how hard of this? That man got good things on TV? Dominique Foxworth played through spitting up blood during a contract year. Jay Culler scrambles to the right and then scrambles to the left. I go to the left with that he comes back to the right. As I'm coming back, Eddie Royal dives through my chest.

And I thanked him after the game. because he didn't hit me in the head because it was legal back then. I got up from that play and started coughing and spitting out blood. And then I started to walk in the direction of the sideline because this ain't normal. And then it hit me, nah, bro, it's a contract year. Lined up and played the next play. And there are people who have done much more absurd things than that because I wasn't even that good. Craig and Erlene Cody share the tale of bamboo reed.

When you were pregnant with Christopher and we were dreaming up possible. names. I came up with, you know, we were going through the usual suspect of names. I came up with a rather unusual name that you vetoed. Is that when you were on the LSD? Is that when that was happened? Yeah. Please. Now, that was well after that. You mean the bamboo reed things? Oh my God! No way! Upset! Upset! Yes! Andrew Zimmern collects animal nut sacks. I have the nutsacks of six or seven different animals that I've taken in the wild and whose balls I've eaten. Which animals? I have a wildebeest nut sack over there that is about the size of a softball.

Billy Gill got big-timed by Miami Heat Security at Amos, Miami. I was like, why is this guy just hanging out by the stairs? There's this big crowd of people. Like, I wanted him to feel welcome. So I was trying to be like a good host. So I was on the stage and I walked over to him. And I said, hey, good to see you. like, thanks for coming out, because I've been told that he's a big fan of the show.

So he shakes my hand very nicely, and then I walk away and I go back on the stage to do whatever we were doing. And then report got to me that he then turned to the person next to him and said, who the bleep was that guy? Yeah, he's terrifying, and I don't know why. I wasn't terrified. I thought he was a dick. He was one of the fans. All right, I'll get back to him. Come on. Poppy Lovetard tells us about Fred Dreyer.

The guy used to eat salmon, that's all the guy ate, you know, and he was in real good shape. His cholesterol level was in tip-top condition, and I said, oh, my God, this guy is going to live forever. And one day, I get up in the morning, and I look at the news, and the guy dropped dead. I said, how to hell, this guy could drop dead? You know, he's such a healthy nut, you know? Well, that happened, so I stopped eating salmon. That's it. I don't need salmon anymore.

Let's clip that out of here. I'm being told that Fred Dreyer's still alive. Nah, I don't believe that. My sirs tell me that he dropped dead the number of years ago. Amino Heson got face-to-face with Mike Tyson. Crowded bar and I'm walking out and someone like bumps it to me until my drink spills. And it went all over Mike Tyson and he turns around. And this is when he first got the tattoo and it's glowing in the dark of the black lights.

That's prime like, oh my God. That's prime don't spill a drink of Mike Tyson. That's no F. Givens, Mike. And this crowded bar that was like, really congested a second ago it was all open and it was just me and Mike Tyson and everyone was like a hundred yards and he his eyes

his beady little eyes were like glowing too and they were angry so I said the only thing that came to mind ah salam alaikum brother and he dabbed me up and he pulled me close like sharply like that I'll kill you and in my ear he said alaikum salam but he said it so

close to my ear I thought he was going to bite my ear so I jumped back and then he He released, and then I just, I ran away. Jonathan Zaslow disrupted Brad Williams show. My wife and I were at the show. We're sitting toward the back in one of the couches. And there is a really loud man who is behind us with a couple of women.

They have been over-served. They are clearly drunk. And they are loud. And so I could feel the build-up. My wife is getting agitated at the people who are being loud and disrespectful to Brad. and it got to a point where I turned around and I yelled for everyone here.

Shut the fuck up. Just to be clear, Zaz is making his wife the Jada Pinkett in this scenario where it's like, Will was sitting there like, I don't want to slap Chris Rock, but my wife's uncomfortable, so let me go assault one of the best comedians ever. So Zad is sitting there going like,

I don't want to ruin the show, but my wife's uncomfortable, so let me go ruin the show. Dan Levertard's Fireworks Adventure. So I go to the park, all right, and I just take the very smallest of the explosives, and I like the fuse, and I walk away. What happens next is such a bombardment of neighborhood machine gun fire and smoke that I run out of the park because I don't want to be seen by anybody in a neighborhood where it won't stop. Like, I get to my car. It's still going.

It was such a ratat-tat-tat of like 90 seconds of neighborhood machine gun fire on an otherwise tranquil, sunny afternoon that I immediately came home and gave my fireworks away to a couple of my friends. Dan Levitard lost his ticket to the Pearl Jam concert. What happened is we had tickets and they were hard tickets, actual tickets, not on the phone. Tickets were distributed to each of the people in our party about an hour and a half prior to the concert. When it came time to enter the venue and show the ticket, Dan Levitard says, sorry, I can't find my ticket. He lost his ticket, which would have kept him out of the concert. He was there for his wife, for her birthday.

So my girlfriend has to go looking in a casino for his ticket, doesn't find it. And I'm forced to get him in because I knew security. So Dan gets into the concert. There are eight of us for only seven tickets. So we squeeze in. And all of a sudden, there's this guy standing. where our seat is, and I, no one else said a word, Dan is just sort of standing there with his eyes half open.

And I said, excuse me, this is not your seat. And what does this man do? He showed the ticket. That was Dan's ticket. Because who else has a physical ticket? Like, obviously it's Dan's ticket. B.J. Upton asks Tim Kirchon, his shoe size. Dan, I was in the dugout once in Atlanta.

And B.J. Upton came up to me during, the game. And he just looked at me because I'm right there in the dugout with a microphone in my hand and he said, my brother and I were wondering, what size shoe do you wear? So I wear a seven and a half shoe. And he said, man, that's a really small shoe. And then he walked away. That's what you get when you're the dugout reporter. Dan Levitard threw carrot cake out of the press box. Dan had brought back a piece of carrot cake, a square of classic carrot cake from the dining room. Dan looks at me, looks at the carrot cake, and then he kind of puts his hand like he's going to flip the carrot cake over the railing into the crowd. And I look at Dan, I said, you're not going to do it.

Like, don't do it. Don't do it. And, you know, Dan, that to him is saying, you're going to, you have to do that now. So with just a quick little flip of his finger, the carrot cake over the railing, gone. And now, since we're professional, what do we do? We both push back from the desk because we want to separate ourselves from possibly somebody seeing us. And then about 10 seconds later, thick New York accent, shouting up, hey, great New York. Hey, you idiots, you think that's funny throwing cake from people.

You guys are idiots. I'm going to come up there, blah, blah, blah. And we are both just, we're about to die. It's like, I literally want to just disappear. He thinks it's the funniest thing in the world. David Sampson gave a sermon at a black church. I needed their support for public money for the ballpark. So hold on.

I was the only white guy in there. Jewish. I am Jewish. I am white. The white is the second. How did you, okay, so. How did you dress? How I dressed is I went to visit a black teller.

Hold on. No. And I had a suit made for me by Andre Dawson's tailor. So I looked like Andre Dawson, and it was awesome. I had a consigliary, who was Cuban, and we had a plan of all the different people we had to get votes from. So we went to the Cubans, we went to the non-Cuban-Spanics. A hundred percent.

I had to go get one personally made, Guy Vara. What's the best story in there? Which one did you guys like best? And I will give you the context for what's happening in the lower right-hand portion of the screen. in a second because this was the moment that got us ended at ESPN basically and what you can see in the corner is executive producer Billy Gill has been sent to the penalty box and I don't believe he can hear what I'm saying right I could not but I knew right well so I knew what was coming so you did know what was coming so the directors uh in Miami just put it on Billy because

clearly if this person's going to be suspended, no organization that made this go viral would just air a guy sitting there the entire time. Just Billy sit. Like, that's the reason they went to that shot. That's good directing right there. It's the reason they went to that shot. And Billy looks like he's afraid,

even though he's not afraid, but he was afraid? My wedding was a week away. That was the day before I was going, or two days before I was going away on, like, a bachelor trip for like a two-day trip just before. A bachelor party is that what we call it? Yeah, but it was like

it wasn't a party. It was like we went to like frigging Orlando. It wasn't like you know cocaine and strippers you know as bachelor parties have so it wasn't good. No no it's good time bonding with friends you know and then they were all telling me that wasn't that

so great what your boss said? I was like no I may come back and not have a job it was horrifying. It was terrible like, oh my God, that was so great what he was. Like, it was absolutely not great what he did. I'm coming back from this trip where I'm supposed to be unwinding, getting ready to wed my beautiful wife. And I don't know if I can provide for this family anymore

because Dan wanted to prove a point. And he wanted to have a little hissy fit, even though we were trying to say, hey, let's just, let's tone things down a little bit. Let's calm down. And he wanted to do it anyways. So no, it was not great, friends. I'm quite stressed out right now.

and surely things can't get worse next week, and they did. The way that it worked out was... He came back from his honeymoon and we were no longer going to be with the SPN. No, we were still with the SPN, but I came back from our honeymoon in 790s that hit the road jack. That was true. You guys are too hot for us. That was another thing that happened. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Every meaningful moment in my life I can connect to disaster at work that I could not enjoy in my personal life because someone was acting amok here professionally. That's a great top five list. No, it's not. It's tragedies of my life, scars, mental scars that cannot be healed. Yours of therapy I have attempted to unsuccessfully. Clearly. We will keep... Like the mark of a raptor.

It can never be taken off of my soul. I was going to say brain, but soul. What's the mark of a rafter? Yeah, raptor. Like, you know, in Jurassic Park? I guess that maybe is a T-Rex. You know the market? I think it was a wrap. It's a very common expression. People say it all the time.

Ever heard of Thomas Edison? The Toronto Raptors, basically, what you're saying. That was more of a basketball-shaped. We have a pickle later. Roy, ruined that surprise. I apologize. Apologies again for that. We have to get to Diana Rusini in a second as well.

And I want to, because in 30 minutes, Greg Cody is going to reveal where the dolphins are ranked. and I think Zaslo's close to sniffing out this story. I actually just got a text that my dad, it was originally going to be noon. He said to the Herald, hey, the Lebitard shows doing this thing. We got to get it out of 10. He has not got confirmation yet that it will be out of 10. He's hoping it will be.

Oh, no, then we got to break this news on it. We can't wait if we know it's got to happen before we leave the air today. We can't wait around for him, especially if Zasbo gets the story. Yeah. The Herald, I don't know if you know. I don't work for the Herald today. The Herald deadlines mean nothing to me. Just to be clear, we could wait.

He's our friend. Yeah, we could. No, we can't wait. We should break the story. If Zaslow has the story, the news waits for no man. You're positioning it as if we don't have a choice. We are making a decision. The news waits for no man.

Do you think breaking news is about to come out and somebody in the newsroom says, what about our friend? Sometimes. Yeah. No. Sometimes. What do you think the whole Epstein list thing is? Now maybe.

It's not how he used to be back in Zaslo's day. I'm going to call your dad here. And as I do this, I'm going to fake. I'm going to FaceTime him. Put him on speaker. But hold on a second. And I will put, even though you guys shame me for that yesterday, I will put him on speaker. But before I do that, just real quick, because we're in the local hour.

And I really do want to talk UM Notre Dame. Mike, what are you doing later today to talk UM Notre Dame for five straight hours, if anyone wants five straight hours of Mike Ryan, hasn't been allowed to talk about it here? So he wants to talk about it five straight hours there. As a partner over at Cain's Insight, make weekly appearances, Kane's Insight, broke a lot of news over the off season for my money and quite literally my money. The best Cain's coverage there is out there. We're doing our second annual hurricane. Last year we kicked things off with a five-hour marathon that had a ton of guests.

This year, the marquee is even bigger. It begins at 3 o'clock. We have Chris Felica, Bruce Feldman, Jay Lucas, a new men's team coach, David Lake, Jessica Smetana, and Mike Golick Jr. will be joining us. Kevin Clark, Brett McMurphy, and hopefully, a big-time special guest. Dude, you should get Xavier Restrepo. He's got nothing going on now. He's got nothing going on. Waved by the Titans yesterday. Billy, how many people sent you that?

Just you, but I had other people tag me. Yeah, I don't like this. I don't like that I'm being tagged and people think that I'm celebrating someone's downfall. You are smiling. Well, no, because I got the text from Dan, so I knew we were going to get here eventually today. It's a dream. It was an easy joke to. throw in there but I don't like being you know attached to essentially my words I'd like to

just kind of say things for laughs and move on like I don't like this Josh Allen stupid face thing but Billy Billy you got it right though on Restrepo he look there's plenty of that story still to be told you don't you don't really do consequence as well um fair I'm gonna call Cody all right because this we might we have the chance of getting him pissed off all over again I'm nervous about this. For the podcast, listeners, Dan is calling Greg Cody on his phone, maybe. Turn the volume up. Seems to be a confusion there.

Oh, he's fumbling around the phone there. Now he's raising the volume. I don't hear ring fingers on one side. Oh, couldn't figure it out. We'll try again with Diana Rossini. Now is a good time to remember where tequila's story truly began. In 1795, Cuervo invented tequila. Quervo.

What are you doing here? Quervo. Anytime someone says quervo, I show. up. Well, I do know that to be true, but even during an ad reads, like... Quervo. I think he could lay out, especially for one of our great partners. Sweet, delicious quervo. Since then, Quervo is stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion. Quervo. So, enjoy the tequila that started it all. Quervo. Quervo. The tequila. That invented tequila.

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