The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: The Moratorium

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

"Please email H-Argh." Dan doesn't understand how the shadow show works, Roy wears jeans to a golf course and sings a bacon-themed song, Zaslow sounds like a scorned lover, and Mike suggests UNC hire someone more experienced than the very green, certainly-not-hirable Jai Lucas. Today's cast: Dan, Greg, Zaslow, Chris, Jeremy, Mike, Roy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I believe that we are the only sports show in America, maybe the world, maybe not just sports, proudly broadcasting human beings descent. Greg Cody, never more so than yesterday when Greg Cody had a legendarily bad performance. But do you know where he started today while complaining that he's lost his voice as? Where? He started today by saying to his son, I thought we started at 858. We used to.

No. We've always, like, Greg, I cannot tell you. This might explain why you're always late. I don't think he's ever really understood the concept of the Shadow Show. But then again, neither is Dan. He thinks that the podcast audience can't hear it. We always include it. I'm always late.

I don't understand the Shadow Show or everyone here doesn't understand what I'm trying to do with the Shadow Show. Oh, I don't understand it. Oh, Shadow Show. You were saying, Greg? No, show. Did you say I was always late? Who was in the studio first the last couple of days? Me or you?

This guy is flexing off. I walked in with Greg. Spring break traffic one week and he thinks he's just got it figured out. Who won't? He's leaving at the same exact time. He's like, hey, I'm here earlier. Early, early bird getting the worm and you're sleeping in. Your computer made a dinging sound.

You owe $5 at the fine bucket because your computer isn't ready, but you weren't expecting the show to start for a couple minutes. So we negate that fine. But how do you, no. How do you not know when we start? How is it possible that you don't know when we start, when we've been starting at this time for a couple of years now? Okay, who starts anything at 855? It's a fair question.

Round it up to 9. You know what? That is a fair question. Put it on the poll at Lebitard show. Who starts anything at 8. T times. Outside of T times. I don't know what else.

I mean, it's really not like if you know anything about radio, and I know this isn't exactly radio, but if you know anything about radio, starting at 855 makes a lot of sense. Why is that? Because other shows, other things start at 9, you have a heads up, and people aren't going to leave your show five minutes in to go catch the start of another show. They're already listening to you. Look at a big radio brain on Zazz. Wow.

How about that? Big ad brain. It is funny to hear Zazzo Laceda Cody, of all people, if you know anything about radio. He doesn't know anything about radio. Famously. You mentioned T-Times. is it true? Is the rumor true that Roy showed up at a golf course wearing jeans?

That's not embargoed. No, that can't be. Roy did wear jeans. There's a debate here. All right. So it had the gene nipple pockets. Oh, yeah. You know that nipple on the side. You know, like the little button. The little button on the side. What is it for? Just to be able to look from afar and be like, oh, look, those are jeans. And so like, Roy walked in in conventional jeans made of dental.

him today. I'm like, hey, Roy, you're wearing your golf pants. Put it on the pole at Lebitard show. Can you wear jeans to the golf course? Yes or no. And also put it on the pole. Do you know what that nipple on the side of the jeans is for? Purdue

was a number one seed as? Kurt cousin looked at JC Pini. Look, Slah. And Jack, it's bracket time, so make a chart. Does Jeff himself? Jack.

is gone from the tournament. Jim Harbaugh looks like a casket salesman. Fairley Dickinson, 16 seed, rep by. Mike McDaniel looked like a college student on a full-ride scholarship for e-sports. What a run. Over the years, you guys have heard me nominate an assortment of headlines

for single strangest headline in the history of ESPN.com. But I believe I have in front of me the winner, and while you guys might not remember any of the others, I just want to hear from you whether you think this is a worthy candidate for weirdest headline ESPN.com Hall of Fame. Quadruple amputee cornhole player fatally shoots man. We're not going to do any better than that. And then he drove away.

In terms of weird. Now, that's not, it's not worthy of put it on the poll. Is Cornhole a sport? It's not. They just wanted to write that headline. There's no circumstance in which cornhole is going to get into the ESPN.com headlines, except for this. is the only circumstance that would allow cornhole to be involved with ESPN.com headline. Dan, this has been the biggest thing on the internet for the last like 24 to 48 hours.

This guy who has no arms and legs shot a gun, but there's video of him shooting a gun. We should get that video because I'm, I've got more questions than answers on this. I don't know if he can answer any questions on this headline. Thank you, Tony. I don't know whether his lawyer would advise him to answer any questions, but you start with quadruple amputee, then you go cornhole player, then fatally shoots, man, I want to know if it was a cornhole dispute. I've got nothing but questions. I don't have answers, but I want

to follow this mystery wherever it is that it ends up. I love the fact that there were four guys in the car, and the one with no arms and legs was driving. That's my favorite part of that story. Shouldn't he be the guy in the back? That's your favorite part of this story? Yeah, I don't care that he's a cornhole champion. Apparently he had stubs and he held the gun with his stuff. Lean back. Bees careful.

Can we say stubs? I don't think. I don't think stubs is okay. We've covered this. But I've argued that nubs is dangerous as well. Be careful, too. I don't know what to. I don't know what.

Do you have stubs on your feet or just on your arms? I'm sending an email. That's a good question. I don't know the answer to some of the questions were. He's email HR. Call of Daniel's subs, former UM player. You don't even. have the breath and voice left

to make the terrible joke. It's not a terrible joke. Daniel Stubbs. Keynes fans are out there nodding. Yeah, I remember him. Pretty good. D.E. D.E. Dana Stubberfield. There you go.

Dana Stubblefield. Roy's catching on. What about Dana Stubblefield? We're now doing Stubbs. That's what we're doing. I'm trying to help my guy out here. Please don't. Before the show, Chris Cody said to his father,

what do you think? 2030 carries today? And then Greg said, I'm going to catch a couple of balls out of the backfield and didn't know the word for targets. Yeah, he's like, throw me four times. Yeah. Well, that's a made-up word in football targets. Come on.

What do we play in? Archery? Since you brought us to... Every word is made up. Since you brought us to football, put it on the poll at Levitardt Show, is every word made up. It's a good point. So on and so forth. rare Chris Cody logic that works out.

Yeah, every word is made up. Like at one point, every word has birth point, and before that it wasn't a word. Tony was so jealous. Chris Cody came up with that. Yeah, it is true. Every word is made up. I want to talk about Tua going in Atlanta doing his first press, and I want to talk about what Adam Schaefter said about the Miami Dolphins plans, and it's just super,

rare to see a professional football team in the coupon discount bin the way the dolphins are. They're going to do it with minimum salaried players more than any in the league. That is the plan as they fumigate the building more than it's ever been fumigated. But here's two talking, introducing himself to the Atlanta press. You know, with your teammates. Can you just give us some insight into what it was like last season in Miami and how that might have shaped the season that you had? Yeah. You know, I don't want to get too much in depth with things that were going on more so in terms of players to coaches than it was players to players.

But it was unique in a sense. It was unique. Unique in what way? In a lot of ways. We'll go to Terence Moore. It's a good follow-up from the reporter, to a not looking at the people. interviewing him doesn't come off great there is I think people would be surprised I'll get to this more of the analysis of this sound in a second but I think people would be surprised at how often human beings who are professionals who

have gotten to professional football have disagreements with their coaches that are bad there's a famous Stephen Jackson story you guys can look this up for me if you don't remember the running back Stephen Jackson he ran angry came into the locker room at half time one time was furious with his offensive line coach and his offensive lineman and went to the offensive line coach and said you better get these guys to start blocking and the coach said I'm not doing anything and so he charges at the coach and the center gets in the way of Stephen Jackson with his offensive lineman Stephen that Jackson knocks the center out in the locker room at half time he falls into his other offensive linemen like bowling pins and no one did shit

no one did anything because Stephen Jackson was terrifying. But I think people would be surprised how often players and coaches clash in ways that are meaningful. And obviously, Tua blames the coaching staff for leaving him on an island at the end to take the blame. Yeah, I think he comes off terrible in the clip. I think it's another clip that you can add of him coming off terrible in front of cameras over the last really couple of years. Why is it the case? I don't know. We could certainly speculate. But it also bothers me where I feel like any time, and by the way, where he says, you know, we're not talking player to player, player to coach. Tua, pal, you're the one who got up in front of the cameras

before a game and talked about players being late to meetings and not being accountable. Like, you're the one who put that out there if you want to talk about player to player, player to coach. I just feel like any time he's asked about the Miami Dolphins, because when his contract, was going into the final year. Everyone was saying, everyone outside of Miami was saying, you can't pay this guy, the dolphins paid him, everyone else ended up being right about you can't pay this guy. And I just feel like every time that Tua's asked about the dolphins,

he should be incredibly gracious to the organization. I agree 100% with that. Like nobody would have given that to him on the open market. But to me, this video is super benign. He's doing a press conference on Zoom with like a bunch of reporters. is he doesn't know. He's probably sitting out in some rental, like, apartment. He's looking out of, like, a parking lot.

And he's like, all right, so this is where my life is. Now, I'm answering questions as the maybe backup to a guy who has no knees. And, like, everybody's talking about his mannerism and stuff. He just looks like a guy who's answering questions he doesn't want to be answered. Every market other than ours, this is a nothing burger. Like, that sound clip we just played. That's only because we know him. But it's just like, I feel like we are the scorn lover overreacting to this.

Well, first of all, remember when he got that big contract that he arguably didn't deserve. Show me the money. Show me the money. At the first practice. So off-putting. So off-putting to a lot of people, including teammates, I would imagine. And in this case, I agree with Tony. It's so bizarre. You're a quarterback competing for the number one job, and your introductory press conference is not in person. It's on Zoom. So, so ridiculous. And the other thing he said in that press conference, this is the NDH headline, the no-da headline. I have to play better. if I'm going to compete for the starting job.

Well, no, duh. He had such a terrible season last year. He's lucky to have a job at all right now. And, yeah, just a total disaster that person. You've been riding for Tua for a long time, and now you're just burying him in air quotes that are put in the wrong places in a bunch of different wrong places.

You've been using the air quotes a lot lately, and you were really supportive of Tua, loudly supportive of Tua, and now you're hurt. Now you're... This is scorn lover bullshit that you guys are doing. It's not a press conference. It's a Zoom. And it is a bad way to introduce yourself to your new fans, but he's just not

answering questions the way quarterbacks don't answer questions. Like, there's no, what's the good way to answer that question? It's just with gratitude, like, because I don't think, I don't think he's grateful. I think that at the end, they left him out there to be maximum scapegoat on a bunch of different stuff as the entire team fell apart. And his number one receiver was sent to the hospital with a crack in half leg. Well, isn't he only a scapegoat because he played terrible? Like, they didn't leave him out anywhere. No, I mean, left him out to take the blame for all organizational failure.

He was the last thing standing at the end after they got rid of everyone else. There wasn't anyone else to care about. There wasn't anyone else to blame. He was the last one standing. That's what the money's for. That's correct. You get that 60 mil for that blame. Look, he was a six-year starting quarterback who was unceremonious.

benched for a seventh round draft pick. There would have been nothing wrong with him saying, and I wish he had, something to the effect, I didn't think I should have been benched. I think they made me a scapegoat. I would have loved to have heard him say that. Instead of saying, oh, there was a lot going on, but I don't want to talk about it. That's the worst thing he can say. Folks, listen up, quick break in the action.

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See MoneyLion.com. 10-day Tony. What's up, Mike? It's NBA playoff time. Finally. Yeah, yeah. The NBA playoffs are here. Every possession feels like someone's season is on the line.

Because it is? it's all about drama. And now, there's baseball on every night. We're back into baseball. We are? Every random Tuesday feels like October when you're into the sport as much as we are. Which is why I texted you the other night, 10-day, Tony. Hey, I got a couple of Miller lights.

I got all the games on. Why don't you come over, pal? Guess what I did. You came over? I hauled over there. You hold over there, but not before you stopped by a convenient place to pick up some Miller light. They sell it pretty much anywhere.

They have beer. You had the white cans. I brought over the bruce. brown bottles. Oh, we had ourselves a time. How many times did we jump up off the couch and cheers? Every time. We looked at each other, took a sip, said, yeah, bud, this is exactly where we need to be.

We made the right call. That's why we reach for Miller Light every time. Cheers, the legendary moments with Miller Lite, great taste, 96 calories. Go to Miller Lite.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee.

Wisconsin, 96 galleries, and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Hey, Roy, buddy. You know that energy shift when the game gets good, and everybody altogether in unison knows to stand up on their feet? Oh, absolutely, Mike. Yeah, you've been at many big-time sporting events. You know that moment quite well. That's what it's like when you take your first sip of Cuervo.

Oh, delicious. It's the signal that says, we're not checking the time anymore, pal. It's when small talk turns into stories. Quervo, man, it's at high five A Random Stranger Effect. That's right. The game is popping. You're hugging people you never met before.

That's the kind of energy that Quervo brings. It's so smooth, so delicious. That's the Quervo effect. Keep it, Quervo. Don Lebertard. In terms of Heat fans, you're the most irrational of us right now. What's the pivot to me? No, irrational.

Stugats. Oh, my irrational. You don't hear your voice there? Your voice. If I were making a cartoon thing that was meant to symbolize irrational, that's the voice I would give. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. This Cody's got the hot hand. Yeah, I'm cooking right now.

I think the show works through this Cody today because, I mean, have you heard these takes? Did he need takes on anything? Mine. He wasn't benched for a seventh round pick. He was benched for let's not get him injured here. He wasn't benched because the backup, anyone thought the backup was better. That's not why he was benched. He was benched because it was all over because everything around him had failed and created a situation for the dolphins that has no precedent in the history of this market for a team to just strip it down to the bare minimum.

Let's listen to Adam Schaefter here, explain to you. And Jeff Hathley will be through here to do a South Beach session. I'd like to get to know the coach a little bit. And this stuff matters, okay. I think the fairest criticism of Tua, that's not how you present to your fan base when you're the face and voice of a new team or possibly the face and voice of a new team at quarterback. You've got to pay attention at least some to the optics. Like the Miami Dolphins don't have to drag their coach down here except the present predicament puts them in a position where this leadership group needs to have some faith from its customer base. and part of the reason that this this coach is coming here is because they want him known

because they don't have any players who are known. Like this is going to be the hood ornament on the front of the franchise now, because listen to Adam Schefter talk about what the dolphins are doing and why. The dolphins have over $175 million in dead cap money. So we're talking about a team that basically has $133 million. against the salary cap to go spend this year the composition of their roster. It's just way different. They have 43 players next year who are signed for the minimum wage.

The next highest in the league is 31. We've never seen a team ever try to do what the dolphins are about to try to do. You might as well tear it down and start from the ground up. That's why, to me, I would have called on Devon H&A and if I were the dolphins, I trade them too. Everybody's for sale. So is it safe to assume then that Jeff Hathley and John Eric Sullivan got assurances from Stephen Ross? Yes, that patience lasts only so long. So I don't know whether if it's in year three, people start asking questions or year four, but at some point, they're going to have to show

progress on this roster or else. This is what has happened here. Stephen Ross is coming out of a bathroom, waving his hand in front of his nose and going, John Eric Sullivan, Halfley, get in there. It's terrible in there. Get in there and fix that. Do whatever it is you need to do. Forty-three players at the minimum, that's lunacy. That's lunacy. You can't win. That means you're paying real money to half of your starters. Half, 12, not all of them, half of your starters are going to be minimum guys based on the current roster construction. Yeah, and a lot of that's the residue of the Tua. contract that that continues to be an albatross for for their whole design but yet they spent

fairly big for the position fairly big to sign the best free agent quarterback that's what's at odds here okay if you're going to go all bare bones and you're going to tank you got to i don't think you sign malik willis you got to meet the salary floor you've got to give that money to somebody that's not big money that's just uh hey get this cleaned up in two years get this that's two years of guarantees for Willis on you'll work out or you won't work out. These guys have two years to fix this and show progress. But the way that they're doing it strips it down because I think this part cannot be overstated, okay? It's simply not possible to win in the NFL at all. The Dolphins over under is four and a half this year. Four and a half. It is not possible to win in the NFL

when you have $99 million in cap money that you're paying a quarterback to play somewhere else. No team can overcome that. No management team, no brilliance, no players. It can't be overcome. That's a third of your salary cap. And with the 43 players getting the league minimum, basically, this is not a way of money ball where we're going to try and pay little to no money for guys that are really good.

We're just going to kind of put them in spots. Does that even exist in football? Probably not. But the way that you look at it's like this could be substantially worse. then the year that Dominique said that they needed to arrest whoever was on the roster for how bad the team was, eternally bad or whatever he called it. Like, this could be worse. I believe Dominic is furious at me for the ways that I have misrepresented his point saying the dolphins were unethical. You have up the stakes by saying the dolphins should have been prosecuted and arrested.

Players, he said players should have arrested. He said players are doing their job. There is a model for this, but it's not a very good one. The New Orleans Saints were in Capel and they tried to do what they could with their roster. And, you know, I think they're finally out of it. How about the Broncos? The Broncos had a bad contract to get out of. But nobody's had this kind of contract, the 201.

This is the most. Yeah, but it is a moneyball-like strategy. They're going to go with, you know, draft picks and undrafted pre-agents. The money-ball strategy is finding the value and trying to win with that. The dolphins know they're not going to win like this. I don't know. I think they're going to try to win with their roster, see what they have, and then, you know, they'll take the temperature of the season, and then it'll probably go in one direction.

Like with the athletics and Moneyball, like Billy Bean very famously, felt this team is going to win. There's no way John Eric Sullivan thinks this team's going to win. There's no such thing as Moneyball outside of baseball. Baseball doesn't have a salary cap, so you can go ahead and figure out inefficiencies and cheap play and value in ways in my opicate exists in soccer

much harder than well I was just doing the happy opening week four major sports in the world in America is what I was doing myopia and the salary cap

money ball I'm going to say it again there are no human beings who have ever lived who can immediately fix something that wastes a third of its money giving it to a player who's not going to play for you

you can't make that kind of mistake at that position and overcome it in a sport where the greatest advantage is having value at that position. You've got historic lack of value. The dolphins, like record-breaking inefficiency that the dolphins are trying to overcome there, and it puts them in a position that's rather literally unwinnable. So I want to move from that, though, to what happened yesterday. If you were listening last week to our college basketball expert and taking his picks. He was great at his picks. He did great with his picks. But he told us that Hubert Davis wasn't going to be fired, that he wasn't on any kind of hot seat. And that right there isn't the premier job in America,

but I think it's second in college basketball. Do I have this wrong? Well, how do you define the premier job? Because that makes it sound like if it were the premier job or second, Like, does that mean anyone who's offered the job would take it? I'm saying it's prestige. I'm saying Duke, North Carolina is one, two for me in terms of what is the prestige job? Because the people who have come before you are Roy Williams and Dean Smith. And when you get that job, you're following icons of the sport. But the domino effect that this is going to have, who is considered the favorite for that job?

Because I was surprised that people weren't mentioning Jay Lucas as a possibility for that. that job, probably because he's too young, one year of experience, and when Billy Donovan is somebody you're throwing out there as a possibility, then you're talking about somebody who's top of the food chain. So, number one, I do think Billy Donovan's going to get that job. I think it's going to be Billy Donovan. But as far as betting... If Golden goes to North Carolina, you think Billy Donovan might be tempted at all from Florida?

Oh, that'd be so awesome. But as far as the betting odds go, the last I saw, Todd Golden has the shortest odds. It's three to one. Todd Golden, but I would be surprised, though, if Todd Golden takes that job. And I'm looking up and down the list. You know his name is not on the list for any odds, Jay Lucas. He's not even on the odds. This is where our centrally focused Miami homerism probably is a little bit overstated in the landscape of the college basketball world.

Because, yeah, a job like North Carolina, they're going to look at a few names before Jay Lucas. Todd Golden's won a national title at Florida. If you're in the position of like shoot for the moon, there are names that come on that list before Jay Lucas, probably a dozen. I also mentioned when we were talking about this last week and the potential job opening up at UNC, which of course it did yesterday, and would they look at Jay Lucas? And I told you like, I don't think UNC can't hire a coach

who not has been a coach at a power for school for one year, but has been a head coach for one year. Like, that can't be the coach of UNC. The one that I want is Billy Donovan to go to North Carolina just because if golden leaves or another or Oates leaves Alabama, then you start having the coaching carousel, dominoes start falling. And then you have these like tier two jobs that will look at a guy like Jay Lucas more seriously. I think it's going to be Billy.

If it is Billy, does he have to step down like before the NBA season ends? Because UNC can't wait around for another month, can they? His NBA season has ended. His NBA season is over. Billy Donovan going back to college is interesting. Since I mentioned Jeff Haffley before, the way that he talks about wanting to go to college to teach. He was a head coach at Boston College, wanting to go to teach and realizing how quickly his job became zero percent about coaching. If I'm Billy Donovan, I don't want to go back to the present landscape of church.

chasing around 17-year-olds and trying to convince their families that the amount of money that they're giving is the correct amount of money. There is nothing more important right now in college basketball than money. It's not a coach's persuasive charms on how he's going to raise your kid for you. Well, I'm curious to hear Greg's thoughts here because we haven't talked about, he hasn't done the moratorium on the immemorial on Miami's basketball season yet, and I'm curious your thoughts on the whole J. Lucas situation. I think you got the word wrong twice. In memoriam? Oh, in memoriam. I corrected myself. Okay, obituary. We're giving an obituary here. That's a word. Ulogy? Would Ulogy be better? That would have been good too. All of them would

have been better than my first side about it. Ulogy would be good. All right, guys, we're getting bogged down here. Jay Lucas should get Coach of the Year votes for the way he turned around that team. And the money's what drove, the money thing you're talking about, the portal, the NIL, that's what drove Laryga retirement very awkwardly. And so I would not want to be a college coach in this, today's landscape. Jay Lucas obviously had a flawed team, right? He had no depth. They couldn't shoot threes. If they could shoot threes, they might be playing tomorrow or Friday. But Jay Lucas did a great job. He's young. And I agree, we're a little myopic with him down here because we think, look at the turnaround. He's too young. You say a little myopic. I mean, you say a little

myopic. I mean, it's the best turnaround in the history of college basketball, and it's the biggest, obviously, if it's that, it's the biggest that there was in the sport this year when it goes, like, that will get anybody's attention. When you've turned, when you come in and you start with, the team was seven and 24. Right. Great turnaround. Coach of the year. Not great turnaround. The best turnaround there's been. Not great turnaround. The best we've ever seen. Like, that was. immediately make you a head coaching candidate. I don't think that's my opi. I think anybody who does that would get the world's attention.

I think if you're North Carolina, the bluest of the bluebloods, and you have your choice of coaches, including guys who have won national championships, you don't go to Jay Lucas right now. The NBA playoffer here in Draft King's Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NBA is boosting every game day all postseason long. And when the lights get brighter,

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You love to just get excited about everything. Okay, junior. Stugats. I had to school you and explain to you. He was going to take you to Augusta. When I was 17 years old, Alan Sherry and I used to haunt the Bueller Planetarium. This is the Dan LeBatar show with the Stugats.

I think all of that is overstated in the modern age. I believe Billy Donovan will get back to college basketball and will feel left behind by how they're doing things now versus how they were doing them when he could get Joe King Noah and Al Horford to play next to each other. You know in the 2012-13 season, Tausen had what was previously

the best turnaround in men's basketball history. Their coach was Pat Scary. He is still their coach. They hung a banner in their arena for the greatest single-season turnaround. Miami should do the same thing. I like that. But Dan's absolutely right.

Jay is still a little wet behind the ears. a little bit more experience, I think. You know, this is, let this bake a little bit. It was just a one, maybe he's a one-year wonder. Did you take that serious what Jeremy just said? Didn't you hear what he just said? I was trying to notice that all he's doing is trying to make sure that J. Lucas stays at Miami.

But Mike did agree to the banner there. I don't even know if he knew what he was agreeing. I think that was just like a he's listening waiting for me to finish so that he could do his troll after I did my troll. You just said he won a banner for most improved season now. That's fine. It's great. Put it right next to the gigantic final four banner that we have that is so outsized compared to all the other ones.

I'm curious, I want to put this before the group, because I think what you guys are doing to college basketball is not something you would do to college football. If I told you that a first year coach had just turned whatever college football program, oh, let's make it Indiana, let's make it Indiana. But he'd been a head coach before. Okay, but let's make it Indiana. Let's not make it exactly Signetti, but let's make it somebody who in one year, Jay Lucas didn't do what Signetti did, but in one year everybody was talking about, can you believe that they had the biggest turnaround in the history of the sport? To the degree we always give these guys way too much credit for having some sort of acumen

that a hundred other guys don't have, because we love to do that. We'll take the results and we'll just take somebody and make them the next Belichick because it's like, that person knows a lot more than these hundred other people. people, but when this happens, when the results are this obvious and a results-based business, that person should skyrocket at his age to the top of your list. But he does look like a child. And I- That's a great point.

I want to remind the rest of you that when Hubert Davis was hired for that job, he didn't exactly have the qualifications for what it is. The last time they hired a coach, they didn't go for the best candidate they possibly could have gotten. They went for somebody who had ties that they liked. Right, but if I'm put yourself in the shoes of a North Carolina fan, Jay Lucas,

is a fine plan G? Right? I'm North Carolina. I want a guy that... I want a guy that's won a national title. I want a name that's sizzles. I want name recognition. You know who you can get who's won a national title? He's available.

Hubert Davis. You can get him if you want him. Well, he made it a final four. I don't know why I became ultra-Italian. With Roy Williams guys. Who made it the final four? He made it a final four. No, I just, I think Jay Lucas is a fine candidate, and in a couple of years he can be looked

at it a little bit more seriously, but come on, this is North Carolina. There's like, in that sport, there's Kentucky, there's Kansas, there's Duke, there's North Carolina, like, pristine jobs. You're looking at guys in the NBA. You're looking at guys that have won national titles. You're looking at proven commodities. you're North Carolina fans, do you want a guy from Duke? That's another factor that I think those against them being interested in Jay Lucas. After consulting with HR, it's residual limb.

So Providence coach Brian Hodgson, Hodgson, excuse me, he was introduced yesterday and this joke sounded familiar. It worked better the second time. This is his move at press conferences, and he was asked about the recruiting. How good are you going to be at recruiting? And this was his line, and it went over very well. I want to thank my family. Steve talked about it. My better half, my beautiful spouse here, Jordan,

my son Jet, who you'll hear plenty throughout this speech. If you ever want to question my recruiting abilities, just take a look at my wife, Jordan. That is an, an understanding. unusual amount of applause to get for that joke. It's a joke a lot of coaches use. It's not a great joke, but it's a coach. This coach used when he was introduced at USF and got,

this was a year ago, and it didn't get applause, and he went right back to it. If you have any questions at all about my ability to recruit, look no further than my beautiful fiancee, the best recruiting job of my life. Crickets. He did the finger point. He did everything.

Come on, man. You can't do the same joke the same way and have it kill like that. Dan, come on. You know, you know especially you got to work the clubs. You worked the smaller club at USF, didn't get the laugh. But the same finger gun motion. You're in Tampa. Yeah, you got to practice exactly what it is.

You worked it in Tampa didn't work. You work it in Providence. Good Comedy Town. All of a sudden, people left. There's like 30,000 people at Providence Stadium. It's going to be so great when he does this next year at his next press conference. People say Tampa is a good comedy town. Is this a juxtaposition of how good-looking people?

are in these prospective towns. Like maybe in Tampa, they just weren't that impressed. Ooh. I think Jordan, his wife, is tired of that whole act. Oh, I can't even imagine. Like from year to year, and the first time there's the finger point, and he immediately, when he realizes there's no applause and no laughter, he follows up with a second line.

Like, ah, it's the best thing that's ever happened in my life because he realizes this isn't playing. And the second time, the reason he starts clapping for himself is because he gets cut off before the second line with giant laughing. after and applause. It had to feel so good. If he moves on again next year, you do it again. You just keep this train rolling. Go from fiance to wife to maybe X, Y. He's totally going to do it when Jay Lucas leaves and he's done. And we're going to be like, yeah. They'll laugh so hard. Easy. Jay Lucas definitely needs a couple more seasons to prove to the nation he's got it.

The last couple of days, I have run into people who are muttering under their breath, okay? A couple of days ago at Fresh Market, I'm just sort of leaning into the produce, and there is a guy there who I just hear saying over and over again, accurately, everything's double. And he's talking to himself. Like, he does it, like I'm coming in. He was just totally talking to himself. Today, I walk in and you know who was singing to themselves, a Dave Damashek song, Roy Bellamy. Roy Bellamy was singing a Damashik song. I had not heard as Damashik continues. to infringe on Greg Cody's territory and threaten Greg Cody

because he does back in my Dave and he voiced the tournament and he's doing some of the things Cody usually does around here. The songs, the songs, are Greg Cody's pride and joy. He's the singing sports writer. He invented the song. He invented the song on this show.

What was the Damashek song that you were singing, Roy? Can you give me a rendition and can you tell me it's origins? There is no origins. I just completely make up songs from time. time like hey i got bacon in my hand baking my hand that sort of thing you know i completely forget how i'm saying the best musical performance that's a good song roy walks in in the morning and he's just singing i got bacon in my hand and he's it's it's i haven't seen it but i've heard no dan was there for that

so you i thought that this was a song that appeared on the show on friday i thought there was like dave sang a song you were just roy was singing a damehamehack song and i was just really confused that you were there was no reason for it it was no bob had said uh d d d d d d dames name and then all of a sudden boom, I said. Bobba engineers. Go to Bob Bob. You mean Robert? I've been calling him Bob.

Do not call him Bob. There's one Bob. It's Romitiko. There's one Bob right now. So that's a Damashek song or it isn't? I'm confused, dude. I was confused. I think it was a Roy's song now.

Look, I think everyone in the room is the information I just shared with all of you. Oh no, Roy's saying that's odd. Under his breath, the song he just made up about Dave Damashek, this is a shocking bit of information I've shared with the community. Is it not? It is weird, yes, yes, and I'm the one that sang it, so yes. All right, was this a bacon song? Or a Damashik song?

Is the bacon thing, you just made that up right now? This shows me moving too fast. Okay, so you made up the bacon one on the spot. So what were you singing about Damashore? So out there, you're like Damashik, Damashin? I was just saying his, yeah, exactly. I was saying his name in his song form. So why wouldn't you say that when you, why did you say bacon?

Made up? I got bacon in my hands. You should wear jeans to golf. It was pants. It was stretching pants. It wasn't dead. They had the gene nipples. Everyone says they were jeans, Roy K.

When you felt them, they weren't. They just looked like jeans and they had the nipple. But they were IG jeans, if you will. We looked them up. They're jeans. Maybe. It was a hybrid. You ever thought about that?

Yeah, but a hybrid that was made to look like jeans. Like a jagging, self-driving jeans, but also be comfortable enough for you. You can roundhouse. I've seen those on Instagram. Yeah, Joe Rogan got me a pair of jeans once. I'd like to revisit something that happened yesterday that I'm still confused by. Zaslow, what is your appraisal as we talk right now of Greg Cody's familiarity with the movie Scarface? I got to tell you, we didn't spend enough time on that yesterday.

It's shocking that you've never seen Scarface. Now, look, maybe you can point at parenting if you want, but I saw Scarface for the first time. I was probably like eight or nine years old. Have you not seen Scarface? You're bragging or complaining? No, no, it's a fantastic movie. Okay. The accent, though, is renowned for being awful.

Who cares? He's great in the movie. It's an iconic character. How can he be great in the movie if all people do is make fun of his awful Cuban accent? He's an iconic character, Tony Montana. Movie is incredible. There's so many lines that you recite. You got big stars or actors and actors who turned into big stars. Who have assessed you was a cop? I mean, come on. This is an incredible movie.

He's got a Cuban pass. He's allowed to be Cuban. He and Razor Ramon, the only people that aren't Cuban that are allowed to be considered Cuban canon. Well, Greg doesn't know movies. But when I think of Scarface, the first, almost the only thing I think of is how vilified and mocked he was for his accent. You think that's the overriding theme from that movie? Yes. And I think most people would agree with me.

That's not, Greg. Greg. That you've never been this wrong. I doubt that. You think... You're a nuts man. I could come... He goes, I doubt that.

I could come closer to arguing that that is Al Pacino's most famous role than I can to arguing that what Al Pacino is known for is culturally appropriating a bad accent and scarf. That's only Cubans who care about that. And if you've not been watching the news lately, nobody cares what Cubans think about anything. We love Scarface. It is his most... Famous movie, but notoriously so. Jeremy had the finish.

I don't think that character has legs. Hey!