The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: The Most Voluptuous Number

Episode Date: September 18, 2024

Today's Cast: Dan, Stugotz, Greg, Amin, Billy, Tony, Jeremy. There's a living, breathing Babe Ruth in baseball right now and the crew claims they're interested, but nobody actually seems that interested. Why will nobody talk about how incredible Shohei Ohtani is? Why was Jose Altuve taking his shoe off in the batter's box? Plus, we take you Behind The Bit one of the most iconic moments in show history, when Chris Cote dressed up as a car battery for an entire show and Dan got into it with the security at the Clevelander. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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the CV. Copyright 2024. Proximo. Jersey City, New Jersey. Please drink responsibly. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadow Show. Shadowin' it. What a delight we have today because it's not just that it is the rare Greg Cody Wednesday. It's not just that Amin Elhassen has bombed in because he's got a lot of opinions on a lot of things. Stu Gotz has disrupted the entirety of our chemistry around here because he has decided that he wants to be in the shipping container, I believe,

for the first time ever at the beginning of a show because he simply wants to be closer to Tony. It is jarring seeing him in there. It's weird, right? It doesn't, I mean, what are we gonna do? You're sitting in the Stugat seat, Greg just said to me, he just said to me, I feel bad. And he was saying he feels bad because he thinks

he should be in the shipping container as if that's a demotion. When it's not a demotion, it's a promotion to being near the lovely scent of Tony's masculinity. Yeah, listen, Tony's only in a day or two a week, and when he's here, I like to be close to him. And so this way, I am close to Tony. You'll find me sitting on his lap at some point.

I love Tony. You know, I've always thought of the shipping container like the back of the classroom. It's not a demotion, Greg. It's quite the opposite. It's like the demotion. Yeah, it's quite the opposite It's like the people sit up front. We're really engaged and we're doing this thing. Look whatever the teachers talking about We're right there with yes the back of the class. So that's where the jokes happen That's the cool kids are hanging out and that's where the cool conversations. I mean rather be back there

I would I mean doesn't like to be in here as much as he likes to be in the other room Just flinging feces Well, I didn't mean it as a demotion and I mean is exactly right and when I was a school kid Way back in the day We used to pass notes because we didn't have a way to text yet And so way in the back of the classroom was where the note passing happened where the little quiet giggling happened It was the place to be. Greg, I love that you brought back passing notes.

We should need to do that on the show more often. Passing handwritten notes. We do that a little bit here. Not so much in the shipping container. But let me just tell you right now, kids, they don't text in class anymore. You know why? They can put their phones in the little cubby before the class starts. They can text each other. I did not know that. class starts. They can't text each other, yeah.

That's all kids, all schools. Are we still doing spitballs? Is that something that still exists in a classroom? Is that something? How else you get someone's attention? Put it on the poll at Levitar Show, Juju, are we still doing spitballs in classrooms? Tony, are you comfortable?

Our HR department might not be good with some of what Stugatz is doing right now with his power. Look at you flexing HR. I mean, I know we had HR here. That would have been good to know like four years ago. We just got it. I want to see Stugatz on Tony's lap before the show ends. I just have to see that. Let's not. The visual is, is love. Because I stand throughout the show. So it's either I have them on my shoulders or that's it because I don't really sit I'll take the shoulders. Yeah This is the Don LeBattor show with the StuGuts podcast

Today's episode is sponsored by DraftKings stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show. DraftKings, the crown is yours. I need some assistance here from the group because all I've got in all of the people that we have here today that is really excited about baseball is Jeremy. Now Billy is, he is creeping closer to caring about the last couple of weeks of baseball. He was watching Otani on his phone. You can't make that noise and not you. You checked in on a Marlins game last night on your phone.

You can't go when you're checking scores on your phone of a team that's 40 games under 500. Yeah. Well, I mean, you're making it seem like I don't care. I do care. And I do regularly check in. But I'm keeping an eye on This Otani situation because he could be the first player ever to be a you know member of the 50-50 club And he could do so here in Miami. He's two home runs and two stolen bases away from that now They're here for two more days

So what I'm doing is is I'm keeping an eye on it to know if I should buy tickets for Thursday's game or not Like in the quest for history, I would like him to get close to history tonight, but not too close. Honestly, if he could knock one of the two categories of 50 out of the way tonight, that would probably be close enough for me. No, you want him to do one of each tonight, 49, and then get the bonanza of on Thursday of one of each one of each 50

That's fine. I mean, I just want I want enough progress to be made tonight So I have to make a decision as to whether or not I want to go Thursday I learned in each year Oh's quest for 3,000 hits that going every day hoping to see it happen is a fool's errand Hmm. It's a fool's errand I would go and he needed three hits, and he's like, is Ichiro gonna get three hits tonight? Like, no, realistically not, he's a pinch hitter. He's not gonna even have three at bats.

So I learned the hard way. With this Otani situation, I need to go when the time is right, so I need him to make progress today. He made progress yesterday, I need more progress today, and then you will maybe see me there on Thursday if I'm allowed to go. It seems like this happens to you all the time though, because then you go to Miguel me there on Thursday if I'm allowed to go it seems like this

Happens to you all the time though because then you go to Miguel Cabrera's thing and that also happened there and Then the each hero thing too So you're like two for two on trying to go see history happened in Colorado, correct? We don't need to go down this path again Yes, each hero happened in Colorado the day before they returned to Miami because Don Mattingly decided it was time to give him a spot start after he had been pitch hitting for months. Let me give him a spot start and sure enough, the day before they return home to Miami

after they've been tricking people into coming to watch their games for months, he does it the day before they return home with a triple that just got over an extended outfielders glove and then hit the wall, has only hit it a day. We don't need to go over that again. And in terms of Miguel Cabrera,

Miguel Cabrera did his part to an extent. He did his part in that the day before he got three hits and he was one hit away and then I said, you know what, after Ichiro did this dastardly deed to me that he made me do all of this for nothing, I need to go see this 3,000th hit. So I went up to Detroit and he didn't get a hit. And then the next day, the game was rained out.

And then my quick trip to Detroit for a cup of coffee up there one day, maybe back the same night, maybe back the next day, turned into a full weekend's worth of things. And then it became a situation where I had the tickets, but I needed to buy back the next day, turned into a full weekend's worth of things, and then it became a situation where I had the tickets, but I needed to buy tickets the next day, and then they made it a split double header, so you needed two different tickets to get there.

It was a whole fiasco. It ended up happening on a Sunday, but it should have happened much sooner. It took like five days. It was a whole thing. It took a long way to get there, Billy. It really did, to the end of the story is what I'm talking about. Listen, chasing way to get there, Billy. It really did, to the end of the story, is what I'm talking about.

Listen, chasing history is a very tricky game. It is. I mean, you never know. How is it that you two can be sitting or standing that close to each other and not know that the other one was going to talk so that you, like, how is it possible that you and Tony talked at exactly the same time when you couldn't be closer to communicate? Actually, I think we're not close enough. You're right, Dan. That's on me. It's not that you and Tony talked at exactly the same time when you couldn't be closer to communicate.

Actually, I think we're not close enough. You're right, Dan. That's on me. It's not on Tony. Totally on me. We're not close enough. I'll get closer. I wondered the same thing. It's it's hard to imagine what just happened there, but one of the things that I wanted to do because I'm gonna try and get the group enticed with baseball. I know it's gonna be hard, but- Why do you keep saying that?iced with baseball. I know it's gonna be hard, but. Why do you keep saying that?

We love baseball. Good question. I keep saying that because every time I've tried to talk about it over the last three years, nobody but Jeremy wants to talk baseball with me. He's chatty, that's why. Yeah, he just wants mic time. He'll talk about anything you want.

Talk to him about crochet. I'm sure he has thoughts. I've been talking to our metal arc Metrics people okay And one of the things that they've been saying for three years is the way to get all of the metrics up is To have hot takes and that's not really generally it's not generally what I do However, I have a hot take today. It is a rare, it is a rare thing for me, but I believe that I'm going to say something

that is surprising at the very least, because what Ohtani is doing, there is no precedent obviously for this kind of player. Somebody who when he's, can hit 50 home runs and also be someone who's a dominant pitcher. But I actually think that the rarest thing he's doing is the stolen bases at that size. It's like seeing Babe Ruth being able to steal 50 bases.

The guys that are that power hungry generally don't bother with the risk of getting injured stealing bases because what's the point of stealing one base when you're really good at taking all four of them at one time that's a fair point of of all thought the stolen base was a little overrated uh... it's idea i think the storm base is overrated and and here's another thing I take, and I hate to say it because Ohtani is a wonderful player, best in the

game. The whole arbitrary celebration of 50-50 is the contrivance. I feel that way about a lot of milestones in sports. Okay, why not 45-45? Let's celebrate that and not worry about whether he gets to 50 or not. I think he's not setting a record It's not a record for most. No one's no one's no one's done 50-50. I understand that but it's a it's it's an arbitrary contrived Milestone is all I'm saying. He's not setting a record, you know, it's not somebody's 750 no Dodger has ever hit 50. You don't care about that. No, not really I mean it's a look he's a great player player and he doesn't need a milestone to be seen as even greater.

That's my you know, the idea of and with due respectability, the idea of making a special trip to a ballpark to see history made. It's arbitrary history. It's sort of a contrived milestone. It's you know, if you're a fan of that team, celebrate it. But for all of baseball to celebrate it, I think it's a bit much. I was about to get upset then the more Greg talked about it. The more I'm coming on his side, it is just kind of a number. He's already the only member of the 48-48 club, right?

Yeah, exactly. When did we, we didn't make, I didn't see any fanfare about that. What is it about 50 that makes it magical? Yeah, it's crazy. That's in sports though. If it ends in a zero. Yeah, we laud it and He's right. I mean, it's just a round number round number. That's what people around number Okay, five is an interesting shaped number. It is it's like it's got a gut but also it's trying to like Suck it in a little bit in the front a little bit in the back. Yeah. Yeah Eight is really the most voluptuous of the numbers, if we can agree.

I get horny. I get horny. Eight, eight. Yeah, I see the numbers. I'm an eight man. Yeah, I am too. That's a good point, Billy. I prefer the two.

What? Ew. Ew. I don't know what to do. Two is boring. What does that mean, two? Deviant. Awful.

Two is awful. I don't want to body shame a two, but like we could go to see Dr. Hoxdeen. Don't shame me about what I like physically from my numbers, don't do that. Is this the hot take? I mean. Yeah, what is the hot take?

Here's a hot take. If Babe Ruth came back to play today, I would not bother going to watch him. It's a mediocre take. Not interested. That's not a hot take. Not interested. What Grant said is a hot take.

An all-time great, an all-time great, came back via time travel, and he's the only person that has access to time travel. And he came back, or I guess he came into the future, and he's gonna play a game. And I tell you, I'm not interested in going to see that. I'm not interested either. I'll tell you why, because the whole thing is the mythology.

Then you put him out there, and someone throws 105, and he's like, what sorcery is this? I don't want to watch him turn into Greg Cody at the plate. Go read for me how heavy the bat was that Babe Ruth swung, that he's gonna try and hit Zach. You can't trust anything that you read in those history books.

Zach Wheeler yesterday was throwing nothing but fastballs. Nothing, it was just fastballs. It was like 80% fastballs, and they couldn't hit any of them. The piece of lumber that Babe Ruth would be trying to get around very slowly on Zach Wheeler. 42 ounces on the bat, I found it says 14 chicken eggs. That's how they used to measure things at the time of Babe Ruth.

He was Dominican. He was Dominican. Greg Cody, how long have you been married? I have been married about 42 years You think 42 as an anniversary is as big as 50 Yeah, I think they're all big when you get to be my age that's different though many people have been married 42 years It's not something to celebrate. I can tell you this

people have been married 42 years. It's not something to celebrate. I can tell you this, my wife doesn't delineate. Like, she wants to be celebrated on every anniversary, and to her, 41 is the same as 40, or 45. Now, 50, again, because of all this mythology about worshiping and numbers ending in zero, I don't deny that 50 is the golden anniversary. You know, I don't deny it, but that too is a contrivance. You know, 45 is huge. 48's gonna be hot. Yeah, right. It's also leaning very heavily on the sexiness

of the number five, right? You said the number five has a gut. But it's cool though. Yeah, nice caboose. Yeah, right. Yeah, it does. It has no caboose, there's no caboose on the five. No five has a gut. But it's cool though. Yeah. Nice caboose. Yeah. Yeah, it does. It has no caboose. There's no caboose on the five. No ass on a five.

The five doesn't have an ass. Hold on. Which way is it facing? No. Well, that's what you said before. You said you couldn't tell the front from the back, but it's clear the guts in the front. Unless that's the back.

I don't know. Now I'm thinking about it. Maybe it is. That is the backside. Maybe it's got a flat tummy and a BBL. And we've been looking at five the wrong way this whole time. That's why I'm telling you,

there's no confusing the number eight. Number eight can be facing any direction, including right at you, and it's like, whoa. It looks the same, yeah. It's a voluptuous number. Oh, yeah. So you guys don't understand how it is that I've observed over the years

that you don't wanna talk about baseball so much that you talk about voluptuous numbers instead in a way that triggers passion in the room, but I'm trying to get you to talk about Otani. And what does he say? Baseball numbers. Don't love the number 50 is what Greg Kodemann says. Well, hold on.

You're the captain of this ship. We just follow your lead. You want to talk about football? We talk about football. You want to talk basketball? We're here to talk about basketball. I'm the captain of this ship, but I've always got a mutiny. When you're in charge, I've always got a mutiny.

Oh, falsehoods. Ha! When you're in charge. I've always got a mutiny. Oh false. It's When you sit in that seat now you have Stu gots behind you sniffing Tony what babe Ruth was Dominican Yeah, of course 100% I mean in night he was born in like 1890 or whatever they were bad at keeping records There's a lot of record his name is George Herman Ruth Yeah His name is George Herman Ruth. Jorge Edman. Yeah, Jorge Edman. Jorge Edman. Jorge Edman, they added Ruth at the end because they're like, we gotta give him something. There's been a lot of people back in,

obviously we're re-litigating history a lot of the times that we're looking at and we're saying, hey, wait a second, he wasn't white. When they got to Ellis Island, they looked at Ruiz and they said Ruth. Ruth, yeah. That's what they gave him. He was an orphan.

Put it on the poll at Lebatard show, was Babe Ruth Dominican because- Get it okay. Well, hold on, of Dominican descent because it says he was born in Baltimore. That's what they say. Have you been to Baltimore? There's so many Dominicans there.

He's of German descent. Allegedly. According to his biography. Hermann. Well, that's according to his biography, that's what I've been trying to tell you this whole time. Okay. Greg, are you learning this for the first time? Learning that he's of Dominican descent?

That Babe Ruth was not white? I've heard rumors about that. I'm not hearing it for the first time, but I'm not seeing it in any legitimate biography of him, so. You're looking through all the mainstream media sources. And where are you finding it? I'm from the streets. Yeah, they talk about it in Baltimore. There tends to be more accurate information on the streets these days than in the misinformation of wherever it is that you're getting your information on the

internet. I believe in the streets more than I do in the internet. Watch the wire one time, maybe you'll learn something. I am not gonna be able to get you interested in baseball with even Jose Altuve being ejected for taking off his shoe. I wanna play this video before the show today and I wanna ask you guys how unpleasant I should or shouldn't find this. I look over to my right while we're having breakfast

and sitting on the couch with one shoe removed, scratching his socked foot with the sneaker on his other foot is Stu Gatz. Yeah, man. And it made me think that you had athlete's foot and that that was an inappropriate Inappropriate place to do that. We're in the middle of the office You're saying I mean a breakfast in office and the breakfast. Yeah all of that around you have an itch Dan

You have to scratch it. I'm not bending anymore. I've stopped bending about a decade ago So I use my foot to scratch the itch, you know, so how do you play? How did the group feel about this? Because I thought it was not only inappropriate, I didn't think it smelled particularly good either. Really? Was it that he was in the eating area? Was that it?

He wasn't, well everything here is the eating area. You've seen people wandering around with food, scrambled eggs, Stugats often walks around with a single stick of bacon in his greasy hand with no napkin. You were so focused on my foot, you didn't realize I had a piece of bacon in my mouth while I was scratching my foot with my other toe. Do you guys think that this is appropriate in any way

in a work setting to take off your shoe and scratch the other socked foot with your sneaker? Dan, as you know, I'm a glass half full kind of guy. I feel like this is a great improvement. He's not using his hands anymore. I was really worried when you said he was scratching his foot, he was scratching his foot, and then he'd dap me up, good morning, I mean.

Now that I know he was using his other foot, I don't really care. I don't come into contact with him. But there's bacon on that hand. He's eating, he's walking around. His breakfast every morning is without a plate or a napkin, just walking around with a single stick of bacon in his greasy fingers.

But if you could shake one hand every single morning, would it be an actual hand or a hand that's dripping with bacon? I mean, come on, a bacon soaked hands? I mean, come on, everyone loves bacon, Dan. I mean, the taste, the smell, the touch, all of it. I don't intend to be argumentative, but we were waiting to talk baseball. Yeah took us to bacon hands and and trashing feet and stuff Yeah, like we're trying to stay on the baseball track here. See it's winding up

We're headed into the playoffs bunch of seam heads we have on this show today And you just want to talk about bacon hands and feet. Well, let's get to this Jose Altuve footage because so to speak Jose Altuve footage because, so to speak, let's talk about the last 12 days of this season because of the wild card are intensely interesting if you care about anything that's happening here. This Padres game was amazing. I think the Padres struck out like 16 or 17 times. The delays caused wild pitches and here's one of the delays because jose altuve

uh... has clearly grounded the ball office for but is also a known cheater and nobody believes anything that the astro say about anything this is what happens when altuve grounds the ball off of his foot men tries to prove to the empire that they've got it wrong that that's not a fair ball. That hits Altube's foot. They're gonna say fair ball. Brennan Miller is gonna say that ball didn't hit Altube. That's gonna be the final out of the inning. Brennan Miller is not ingratiating himself to Astros players coaches or manager. You've got to ask for help. You got to check with other umpires to see if it did hit

out to the. Now to the knees to be pulled out of a situation they need to keep him in this game. They're going to say that's a fair ball and it did not hit out to Bay in the end of the inning. Josh Hader taking them out here for the bottom half of the night. To base showing where it hit his foot. And now he's... That's so bad. That's so good. That's so bad. Incredible.

Altube takes off his shoe and sock to just show, look at this red mark on my foot. This is my proof that you got this wrong. You got all the technology in the world in order to get this right. Here's my foot and he gets ejected immediately upon removing his sock. My favorite part is as he does that, the young looks at me, what are you doing? Get out of here.

Just a big shrug and it falls. Well, I feel like that's what I should have done to Stu Gantz when he took off his shoe in the eating area. What do you want from me? I can't bend. I mean. I mean, you're hoping to get tossed at that point, right? Cause like worst case scenarios, you stay in the game

and then you have like the weird like dirt on your foot inside your sock and you have to run around with that. You don't want that. Like. Even if he's got a red bruise on his foot, it doesn't prove. I'm with you. That it was because the ball hit his foot.

I think it's gamesmanship, right? Like sometimes you go in and the dugout or whatever You punch yourself in the toes a couple times just in the event something like this happens You know like this may have been premeditated. We didn't actually see a replay where it hit his foot I can't believe anything this man tells me Premeditated possibly yeah Gamesmanship the guy wore a wire all right. Yeah, you're gonna think punching himself in the foot is a new thing? Guy wore technology!

You called him a cheater, Dan. You did. Yeah. Bangin' trash cans. You cannot eject him in that situation when he's simply trying to prove to you. You have to eject him in that situation. He's taking off his clothes to show you off. What are you talking about?

He's not taking it off to show you up. He's taking it off to show you that you are incorrect and that he has the proof. It's not proof though. He could have suffered a bruise on his foot. What are we doing? Falling in the shower. Exactly right.

That morning. Baseball Jeremy, we're doing baseball. Oh yeah, you're right. Dan wanted baseball, we're talking baseball here. Right, super logical. Glad this is what we wanted. Okay Jeremy, what should he have done? Not get ejected, you just have a bunch of bare feet people. Shoeless Joe's not in the bowling ball. Okay, Jeremy. What should he have done not to get ejected?

You just have a bunch of bare feet people why shoeless Joe's not in the Hall of Fame for a reason. It's just Jose Shoeless Jose is what he was last night you Greg Cody are somebody who is Moderately interested in baseball. How is it that I get you to be interested in anything that's happening over these last 12 days? Because I'm at the point,

and I don't know how many people in our audience are going to side with me here, I'm already checking tiebreakers. Wow. Ooh. Oh, I love this. Yes. I love the math, the algebra you've gotta do

to figure out if so and so does this, so and so does this. Who clinches the wild card? See, I'm against the wild card. Oh no. Yeah, so I don't like the, yeah, I don't like wild cards in baseball. That's not the problem. At all?

Greg, it's been great. I don't think so. The whole, the only reason the last two weeks are gonna matter is because of the wild card. I know, but again, that's a contrivance. It's not real. It's the will of the day. You know, if you get a wild card spot in baseball, the record shouldn't even say you made the postseason.

Okay, I know the Marlins. The Marlins won twice as the wild card. They won the World Series twice. You're taking them both away. I'm just saying the wild card, I don't, I'm talking about the the wild card they won the World Series twice you're taking them both away. I'm just saying The wild card I don't I'm talking about the latest wild yeah, exactly The recent expanded wild he's not saying you take away the World Series He's just saying you don't show that they made the playoffs right exactly now. Here's the other thing okay? This is a Miami based podcast if Miami had a baseball team that was worth supporting, I would tend to be more of a baseball fan, okay? When my hometown team starts off the season 6 and

24 and by mid-season has traded away everybody anybody's heard of because the owner doesn't spend money, it does deter me from following the sport in general because I'm so dissatisfied and discouraged by the home team. By the way, just to fact check here, the Texas Rangers who won last year. Both the teams in the World Series last year were wild card teams.

Yeah, and the new wild card. A five seed and a six seed. Look, I'm still against it. Yeah. Okay? But should the record show that there were no teams in the World Series No, they won the World Series. They just weren't in the playoffs, but if the Diamondbacks lost the World Series They just didn't make the playoffs and didn't do anything great that seasons. Yes on that's one thing

I used to appreciate most about baseball is that it had so few Playoff spots that they were gold They were something to be treasured as opposed to the NBA and the NHL, where almost half the teams make the playoffs. Baseball was great because it had so few playoff teams, and the more it adds, the more diluted it gets for me. Video, can you please show obvious video of replay of Altuve clearly being hit in the foot with the ball?

I don't know about that. I see a lot of dirt coming up. Yeah. I don't think that was obvious. Oh, come on. Yeah, he reached out. And it clearly changed his angles. He reached his foot out.

Greg was right about the bowling ball. That's right, yeah. Jose Alshuve. If anything, I'd say that's insurance fraud. He heard himself doing something else, and now he's trying to get himself injured at work. Right. This is what is happening with Greg Cody at this age

and I'm assuming that most of the people in the audience will learn that their parents and grandparents will become this. It's not merely that Greg Cody is against learning. He is at this point incapable of changing his mind. He wants baseball the way that baseball was, and there is nothing that I can put in front of him that is going to change his opinion on this.

He is a fully formed person on his opinions, and none of them are changing at this age. Yeah, I disagree. I'm pro-learning. You know, the others, they all learn from me. I'm a guy who learns. Every day of my life, I'm learning.learning. You know, the others, they all learn from me. I'm a guy who learns. Every day of my life, I'm learning. You hate to learn.

You don't want new information on anything. I don't want extraneous information. When a home run is hit, I could give two shits the velocity speed of the ball. Why are you giving two shits on that? Because one's not enough. I'm double shitting. Hey DraftKings fans, are you ready to elevate

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Hey y'all, it's Mike and as you know it is football season. The all consuming football season. You live it, you breathe it, and you want to watch it as much as possible, both on your TV but also sometimes you want to be a part of that atmosphere. But guess what? You don't have tickets, it's a sold out event. What are you going to do? Well, I'll tell you exactly what you do. You download the Game Time app. For my money, it's the best app on that secondary ticket marketplace for a ton of reasons. But one of the reasons I want you to check it out for is this awesome new feature called

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Terms apply, again create an account and redeem code DAN for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code D-A-N for $20 off. Download Game Time today. What time is it? Game Time. Don LeBretard. He called me on my own podcast. He called me full of shit, claiming that I'm faking interest in the solar eclipse.

Well, you do do this. You love to just get excited about everything. OK, Junior. Stugats. I had to school you and explain to you. He was gonna take you to Augusta. When I was 17 years old, Alan Sherry and I used to haunt the Bueller Planetarium.

This is the Dan LeBattar Show with the Stugats. This is behind the bit. This is behind the bit. This is behind the bit. For the past 20 years, you've seen and heard bits on the Dan LeBataille show. You may have wondered to yourself, what are these bits? What's wrong with these people?

-♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh in a ridiculous car battery costume, dancing happily. He will ask all our guests today some awful car-specific pun while in that costume. Is it hot in there, Chris? You need to pump the brakes on the negative attitude. All right, I am revved up for today's show. Let's do it! Ruh-boom! All right, don't use all of your material yet. Guys, this is just a speed bump.

All right, we're gonna get through this. We're in a real negative charge right now, right? We're gonna need a positive charge from you. What Chris? Really feeling the tire pressure today, Dan. Just get out of here. It was really stalling hard. Dan, this is not the kind of suspension that I like.

Producer must've thought you were real dipstick. You were so scared. Battery, tell the truth. Real fluid situation at the start. I was a little low, but then you kept saying to me, don't worry, I got this. Miles, this Sunday, who's gonna be kicking tires and lighting fires?

Pfft. Ha ha ha. Got the car battery is struggling there, it is breaking things, it is hitting the microphone. Vroom vroom vroom vroom. How does this come to be, Chris? This was our sales team doing a great job of integrating content into our show

This is something that Dan has yearned for forever of just wanting sales to be creative that we can do it in the show Where it fits the show. This is just I think as well as we've done at Incorporating a sales thing into content because man, I just remember them sending me an email of just hey We're pitching this thing at Vans Auto Parts, we're gonna need someone, and we think you're the character to do it. And I'm just like, as I usually am, team guy, I'm just like, let's do it without really thinking.

And then once I got in the costume and I was like, all right, I gotta, man, the rabbit hole of, because our audience are the ones that fed me. Like we asked our audience, feed us, what should be my puns? So I was getting a lot of those from Twitter. It was great in audience engagement because people wanted to feed the lines

and they wanted to hear the lines that they pitched. And it was just, I had a whole sheet of just stupid puns that I could just find a window for. And that was a fun week. Do you think the sponsor liked this bit? Just like they say, any news is good news, I think the sponsor liked this particular integration. I mean, it's a car battery with the name on it. You know, Chris Cody is saying car puns.

So yeah, I think they enjoyed that. It was the first time I was part of a sales thing. I felt like there was pressure. I didn't want to disappoint Advanced Auto Parts. I didn't want to disappoint Dan, but it all came together and it was freaking hilarious What did you think of it? Great? Had you seen it? That's something I'd forgotten it It's it makes me smile to see it and Christopher the next time you're meeting someone for the first time and they say hey What do you do for a living? I just want you to show them a photo of you dressed as a car battery because I don't think people

Fully understand what it's like to work on this show, to work on the Levitard show. Weird requests, you get weird requests. You may be asked to dress as Marie Antoinette one week, and you just don't know, and that's a good example of that. What costumes has Dan made you wear? I would say the best costume was most recent.

It was the bear costume. Well, I was dressed up as one of the chefs on the FX show, the bear. What? No, not Winnie the Pooh. I would never dress up as Winnie the Pooh. That seems more like a Chris Cody costume, actually. The best part about that week, and we got to include this,

is Dan yelling at a security guard. What happened was First Take was doing the show at the Clevelander where we were at down by the pool, and they had taken over the whole pool area, and Dan was feeling like, why is First Take coming here, and now it seems like this is First Take's home. No, this is our home.

Chris, I want you in the battery to go downstairs and be in the background of First Take, because this is our studio. They're only here because we're here. Advanced Auto Parts, not a sponsor of First Take. So this ruffled a lot of feathers. People at First Take were like, why is that Advanced Auto Parts battery there?

They're not paying for that. So a security guard came up to me while I'm down there with my jazz hands and is like, hey, you gotta go. And I'm like, okay. So I left and Dan's like, no, no, no. This is my set. We're going back down there and I'm going with you, so I left and Dan's like, no, no, no, this is my set. We're going back down there and I'm going with you.

So Dan goes back down there with me. The same producer gets really furious of like, why is this battery back there again? When we just said they didn't buy time on this, they can't be there. We've got a battery back there. It is a corporate sponsor. I want to on air, take that battery down there myself

and stand in the crowd behind first take Billy and Stu gots can handle whatever it is that we have to do there I want to do that do I have permission to take I want to put in the first take shot both me I'm not asking I'm I'm asking your assessment is the authority given to me as eternal yes man to one day and love it hard Knock yourself out pal. All right, let's go battery. We're going down there. Chris, you help the battery get down there.

The battery has entered the shot. Yeah. Okay, wow. They have cut away. They have Derek Henry on first take right now. This is not terrestrial radio norms where you tell your audience to tune away. Supplementally, if you watch, there is a battery

and a Dan Lebatard at a bar. Jiggling. I believe ordering a drink in front of some bikini beach goers that are sitting at the edge of the Cleveland pool. There is a producer trying to stop Dan Lebatard. Oh, no, this is getting testy. Oh, my god. Dan is in his face.

Oh, boy. Yeah. Are you seeing this? All right, this is a better idea. Forget about a happy place. the the the the the the the the the We are watching through a television screen live footage right now of Dan Leventhaler trying to get the advanced auto parts car battery on the set of first take and screaming at a security guard.

If you watch if you're watching ESPN news right now you have a live shot of Dan talking to a security guard pointing up at the ESPN studio South Beach sign I guess guess in. Do you know who I am? This is my house. This was specifically during Super Bowl week. If you noticed, Jorge Masvidal was at Radio Row. That Super Bowl week in particular was in Miami. So, yeah, I mean, everybody at ESPN descended upon the city, and a lot was definitely going on around that time and specifically I remember Dan getting upset because ESPN basically didn't use him around the Clevelander and they at

first take basically take over the entire property. So Dan and Chris while dressed up as a car battery, went down and had an argument with ESPN Security because he wanted to take over that set for a first take because, I mean, this is quote unquote his town and this was quote unquote his studio. So he wanted to take over the quote unquote stage that Stephen A. Smith was on. So there's a video, there's a photo, a still shot,

of Dan just giving the business of like, like a producer in Dan's face and Dan telling him, this is my, like you just like, you don't hear what he's saying, but in the video you see Dan like, no, this is my set. This is my leg. And Dan was standing up to the first take producers, basically saying, I can do what I want around here.

And it was, and you see my jazz hands, cause through the whole thing, I'm hearing Dan. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm gonna get fired. And I'm just like doing jazz hands with my stupid battery costume. And it was just, that's one of those things that in the moment it was terrifying, but in hindsight, it's fricking hilarious.

Did any of it actually air on first take? Yeah, yeah, it was on first take where you saw me back there, because they're live. I remember walking downstairs for that time, like the second time, when Dan's like, we're going back down there, and I don't care what they say. I had a moment from Bad Boys 2,

where I literally, Dan's like, are you good with this? And I'm like, Dan, we ride together, we die together. Like, what am I gonna like leave you here? Like, I'm in the costume, I'm going with you. Like, if we go down for this, we go down. So they were live and it happened, and there was definitely some like, you know, Dan had the answer from producers,

and there was some drama after. I don't remember the details of it. Would anyone try to steal this battery? I don't think anybody thought of stealing the battery. I think more along the lines of we thought of tossing it in the Clevelander dumpster on the alley once the advertisement flight was done, but there's really no use for it now.

So if you want to steal it, we can just put it outside. You can take it away in a U-Haul or something. Claire, what did you think of the talking car better? It was so funny. It was like super duper. Super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper. I think they get it, Claire. It was super duper. Super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, super duper, One of my favorite visuals in the entire time we've been doing this was seeing through that black screen the horror on the face of your son, Greg,

as all of this was playing out, but his hands never stopped moving. And so nobody could see that the mascot was scared, the mascot looked happy. But as I listened to that, I really am legitimately bothered that our own crew doesn't remember the details on why that happened.

It was not because I'm like, ESPN is in town overrunning everything and it's my studio, my town. I was mad because they'd been charging our people, our cameraman, $ dollars per muffin downstairs, and all of a sudden, our people had to pay for the breakfast downstairs, and their people did not have to pay for anything that was happening.

That's what I was mad about. Dan, I'm gonna tell you right now, I know what you think you're doing right now. Your clarification made it sound so much worse. It was a lot cooler. It was like, this is our studio. You guys are gonna come in here and tell us what we can and can't do.

Dan's like, you're gonna charge us for food? Yeah, Muffin Gate. You sound ridiculous, but you have lost a lot of weight. By the way, ESPN execs kept tabs on that, fired Chris later that year. That's right. Ooh, ouch. I'm not making up that the issue was that for eight years,

our camera people who could not afford the expensive breakfast downstairs were being charged for stale muffins, and then all of a sudden, the spread that came through during the Super Bowl was something that we didn't even have access to. Like, that's what I was upset about. Yeah, but what I mean is saying what Greg is saying

is your honesty is getting in the way of a really good story. Yeah. Not being so honest. Way cooler if you're like, you know, because we see you pointing. When you point, like people think, oh, he just pointed the camera.

No, he's pointing at the ESPN sign above the Clevelander thing. He's like, this is our house. That sounds cool. Not like, I want breakfast right now, this sounds fat. All right, point taken, it does sound fat. The part that I'm objecting to isn't this is my house, it's Roy's assessment, Dan was upset

because ESPN wasn't using him. Oh yeah, that's true. Like that's not, that's pathetic. Like that's not in any way true, and it's simply pathetic. Like, that Roy true. Like that's not, that's pathetic. Like that's not in any way true and it's simply pathetic. Like that Roy's assessment would be, Dan was really upset because during the Super Bowl, he had a great desire to be on first take. But Dan, Dan, it's true.

Super Bowl is your favorite time of year. You're always wanting to be on radio row. You tell Stugats, oh, let me go. Stugats is like, let me just have this one thing. And Dan's like, no, come on, man. And so you were upset. Stugatz and Billy had a fun. Did they ask you to be on first take that week?

They did not. Uh-huh. Are you upset? I mean, I'm enraged still. I'm still thinking about it. I try and hide it under muffin costs, but that's really where my insanity comes from. I just wanted to be sitting next to Derek Henry.

Also, on the side, while we're watching this, I'm looking around at everyone's reaction to different funny times. The only time I saw Greg react was when he saw himself. Well, I wonder why I was there sitting next to Christopher, because I had nothing to do with this bit, you know? So I didn't... finally I spoke, but mostly I'm just sitting there looking at Christopher. Odd choice that I was not asked to sit down

and talk about Roy's totally incorrect assessment that my rage spawned from not being on First Take. I'm not certain there's a show you would least rather be on than First Take. Like if I gave you a choice of all the shows and you had to choose one you don't wanna be on, I believe it would be First Take. Like if I gave you a choice of all the shows and you had to choose one you don't want to be on, I believe it would be First Take. You guys know how we only did it twice. One was to celebrate Randy Moller's gold calls and the other time was because we had to concoct some argument as part of cross promotions

between the shows. And you remember that I didn't want to go on their show and do it their way where I had to do argument television But I was talked into let's do it for the sake of promotion And I guess the third time we were on is when we were on in the background with your son is the car battery And then he was soon thereafter let go Does that count as a first-take appearance of I guess it might it does in the annals of the show on IMDB He's got a credit for it Baseball tonight, would you like to be a part

of baseball tonight? Oh, we'd love that. Are they still doing baseball tonight? I don't think so. No. It's once a week. Yeah, they still have time. Is it before Sunday night baseball?

See, Team Heads, no. They have a podcast too. They should do it on Tuesdays, no? Like Tuesday should be the national baseball day of the week because no one's playing football and it's the only day anyone's gonna care about baseball. Last night was Tuesday. Did you watch any baseball?

No. Tuesday and Wednesday, I guess, right, is when you get a little bit of the football withdrawal at this time of year. But if I can't get you guys interested in what's coming on baseball now, I'm not gonna be able to do it because these last 10 days are gonna,

it's already started. For all intents and purposes, it feels like the playoffs have already started because you've got some situations that might come down to the last game and all of these games are really important and and a bunch of local fan bases are doing well I'm the Mariners I kind of need to go nine and four the rest of the way oh everyone locally in their region is doing that with their baseball team and how many teams are in it like how it's the thing about the wild card that has been so good is that these would not be meaningful games greg like all of these games that have a huge meaning like last night's astros

podres game wouldn't matter under other circumstances so you're you're really missing out on consequences on stakes it's a weird thing for you not to want with your sports right i i i get that but when you play a hundred and sixty two games it's too many first of all i i don't want to follow any sport non-stop for most of a calendar year i just don't and you know if the team the team that now needs to go nine and four for a wild card spot is in that position probably because they had a four game losing streak in May you know so again the Mariners were up ten on the Astros and coughed it up very quickly but

they're still in it right and I don't I'm not gonna be able to do this Jeremy I'm not gonna be able to get Greg there's no angle from which I'm gonna be able to make him interested in this. What about stars? Because there are more stars and up and coming stars in Major League Baseball right now than ever. You mentioned the Padres, Dan. Everybody thinks Paul Skeens is just going to win

the Rookie of the Year because everybody's heard of Paul Skeens. He has 21 career starts, right? And I believe he is only trailing Hideo Nomo, Kerry Wood, Mark Pryor, and Doc Gooden in terms of strikeouts, right? In terms of ERA over 21 starts. Second all time behind Steve Rogers.

He's not gonna win rookie of the year because Jackson Merrill, the center fielder for the Padres, has 24 homers. That's the third most ever in a rookie season for a center fielder. He's spectacular, been carrying the Padres that have all these other names that you've heard of, but yet aren't performing up to snuff.

It's him and Jurikson Profar out in the West doing that for the Padres. Can that get you interested in this chase down the stretch? Look, I recognize, I consider myself to be a casual baseball fan. I recognize that it's been a wonderful season for a number of different things. If all you told me was Otani and Aaron Judge,

those two alone are just having spectacular years worth following. But you know, there's only so much bandwidth, you know, and when my hometown team sucks, yeah, and doesn't spend money. Well, we can follow the... I've been following the Marlins to make sure they don't lose 100 games. They gotta go six and five the rest of the way. Yeah, they're close. Yeah. A big one last night. That was a fun game.

That was a fun game yesterday. That was a big one, yeah. Well that's the drama left in the Marlins season, as well as not they lose 100 games. Jeremy, I'm gonna have to do something, and I'm sorry to do this to you, but I'm gonna need to banish you, even though you're my ally here,

and we will go to you for boring baseball reports during the show But I'm gonna need to send you away here because all of those stats you lost everybody in the room with everything you were talking Well, I got taken out of it when you were comparing him to these historic pitchers because I was thinking wow None of their careers ended up panning out like they all kind of like had all this promise none of those names Rogers Steve none of those names were great. Captain America? Dwight Good? Dr. K?

Yeah, that story ended well? I'm not the whole story, but he was... Jeremy out. I'm sorry to do this to you, but you have to read the room and I have to read the room. We are outnumbered here for a number of different ways. We're here. We're going down this path with you guys. We love baseball.

Captain Mutiny over there. America's pastimes. When you're hiring for your small business, you want to find quality professionals that are right for the role. That's why you have to check out LinkedIn Jobs. LinkedIn Jobs has the tools to help find the right professionals for your team, faster and for free.

As metal art media continues to grow as a content studio, we strive to hire only the best and most qualified candidates. Thankfully, with LinkedIn, they have made it easy for us to find them. LinkedIn isn't just a job board. LinkedIn helps you hire professionals you can't find anywhere else, even those who aren't actively searching for a new job but might be open to the perfect role. In a given month, over 70% of LinkedIn users don't visit other leading job sites. So, if you're not looking on LinkedIn, you're looking in the wrong place. On LinkedIn, 86% of small businesses get a qualified candidate within 24 hours. Hire professionals like a professional on LinkedIn. Post your job

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