The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: The Unkown

Episode Date: March 7, 2024

Today's Cast: Dan, Stugotz, Chris, Jessica, Jeremy, Lucy, and Roy. Dan has to explain the show from the inside as he's dressed as Willy Wonka and Lucy and Jeremy recreate "The Willy Wonka Experience" from Glasgow as "Meth Lab Oompa Loompa" and "The Unknown." Then, JuJu is on an insane gambling run, a kid gets hit in the face with a football, and Ben Simmons is out for the year. Plus, David Samson is here to discuss our upcoming Oscars Party as Adnan Virk joins us from Rays Spring Training. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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DraftKings, the Crown is yours. Forgive the self-involvement off the top of the show. There is plenty to talk about here, but I do want to explain to an HBO Max viewership that must be very confused about how we onboarded because we never explained anything about the show because one of the greatest criticisms I get is that I over-explain things and the new audience gets here and they're like I don't understand why they're all dressed as Willy Wonka. And I don't know the back story of Willy Wonka. I know we are paying grid of death punishments today. Three of us are. And I know that general costume wearing I think shouldn't feel like a punishment. They allege around here that it's a kink for me. I hate this. I lose more than everybody and left my house this morning,

okay, with my wife saying to me, why are you guys so disorganized? You look like shit as Willy Wonka. I've got a purple cake in storage. Why are your people so disorganized? You could have looked good today. That's how I leave my house. And then I get here and Lucy's looking at me

and she's like I hate you You made me wear a Willy Wonka costume. I'm like I didn't make you wear anything Jeremy was around here because he loves these damn costumes more than I do by the way you say it's a kink for me He loves the costumes. You love them too. No, no, I think it's funny content I look I'm looking for the thing I say today that goes viral with me dressed as Willy Wonka. That's how I'm spending the entire show today. But look. Number one brother, you look more handsome

than you've ever looked, I think in recent history. So that's number one. He's right. Number two, $10 tone. Yeah. Okay, $10. $10, oh wow. I mean, I like it.

I like it too, too. Yes. This is the bright and early one. We're blessed to be alive. Here's Willy Wonka spitting out random griefs. You know what? Fair enough, Juju, but it's not a $10 fine. The maximum fine around here unless I kill somebody is $5. If I murder somebody, it's $50.

That's yours, by the way, Jessica. Getting off light, I mean. I was about to call you ridiculous, but I will keep my mouth shut. I've explained to everyone and they don't understand it or think that it's fair that because someone stole the fine bucket, and because someone stole again the most recent amount of money that was in the fine bucket, when Jessica at the grid of death suffered instant death but got the money in the fine bucket. She opened it up to find out that it was gone. And then I pulled it the following week, and because of that, I have said that every fine

that goes into the bucket on my watch while I have it goes to Jessica. So there, and it's all my money anyways, because no one else is paying the fines. Thank you for the tone fine, Juju, but it's $5 and because you gave me $10, two minutes to the penalty. Oh, wow. Only Stugots gets to do that.

Two minutes for overcharging. You're wrong. Only Stugots gets to punish me extra. So I'm sorry I've over-explained the story, but Lucy, what is the story, the real story, of the Willy Wonka thing that we're recreating today? Well, first, I just want to say that I have paid off all of my punishments.

I was done after the last, I believe, 80s costume, but I am here. I'm a team player, and guess what? I'm not very happy about it. But that's okay, Dan. I don't hate you, but I blame you a little bit. Again, just a little. All right, Lucy. But Juju's gone, so he I don't hate you, but I blame you a little bit. Again, Lucy. But Juju's gone, so he can't find me for tone. There are things that I want to get to here,

and I will get out of the muck of this in a moment, but now I'm mad at Lucy for... What? ...Ghost in the Penalty Box with Juju. Wow, two minutes for being a team player. Do you hear something crazy? No. This is my first time in the penalty box ever.

Alright, we'll get out of here. Congratulations. Congratulations, Dan. That's unbelievable. Enjoy it. Well, she doesn't even know what she's being penalized for, which is annoying, and what she's being penalized for is telling everybody that she doesn't have any punishments to serve, and Jeremy just told her to wear a costume because we need to do this Willy Wonka bit,

and that means that she showed everybody the show from the inside. How does she not know what kind of crime that is, yet having been around here for a while? Sounds like a $50 fine. What does this show look like from the inside? Hmm. It's got indigestion.

It's bile. It's a combination of bile and acids and gurgling lava and an occasional fart sound, aopee cushion and some laughter some Sneezes some coughs some race some general there What why you got to bring race into this Why you gotta bring race into some top fives? Well, if you're wondering why Lucy looks like a sad oompa-loompa It's because you guys aren't dressed up as the Willy Wonka in the Chocolate Factory movie, you're dressed up as the Glasgow Willy Wonka

experience that people went to after seeing an AI-generated ad a few weeks ago and then went viral for being the saddest thing that's ever happened. There was like these hired actors in a warehouse dressed up as characters from Willy Wonka, children were crying. What characters Jeremy? I've from Willy Wonka. Children were crying. What characters, Jeremy? I've seen Willy Wonka. It's a good question. I'm the AI generated the unknown. So apparently AI generated this entire script

for what this Willy Wonka experience would be, and they just sort of imported it into AI. And AI created a new villain, the unknown, which is a chocolat tier that lives within the walls of the chocolate factory and scares children. I think there's something about children not being able to go to the dentist. It's horrifying to look at.

It is horrifying. Well, but you guys. And it's scared kids. All right. Well, it's scared kids. And I really do think we kind of skipped over what it is we're trying to recreate today as I too left my house in tears today because my wife is like, your costume looks shitty. It's cheap.

It's cheap and shitty. She made you cry. That's how it's supposed to look. Yeah, you're not Timothy Chalamet or Gene Wilder. You are this hired Scottish actor who was supposed to play Willy Wonka in a very cheap costume at a very cheap event that made children cry, and inevitably led to the police being called. It proves how into this you and her are based off the standard she has.

The thing that I feel like we buried the lead. High bar. Buried the lead on here, and there are things that I want to get to today from the world of sports, though not many. The reason that I think that she buried the lead is because I happen to think that the funniest thing about all of this

is that we just sort of skipped past. We're recreating a movie that made children cry. Like an aggressively scary movie, kids went to go see something they thought was going to make them happy and light. It's Willy Wonka. It's a chocolate factory. It's fun.

It's candy. And they leave crying. Right. This is the Willy Wonka. It's a chocolate factory. It's fun, it's candy, and they leave crying. Right, this is the Willy Wonka experience. In the movie itself, the kids actually died, so. Uh-huh. Yes. Willy Wonka killed those kids. Forgive me for the difference, yes.

I made the mistake of making it a movie. This is a very scary movie. The experience, but kids crying, how many kids crying are we talking about? Like, how often was there video of kids crying with what it is that we're recreating? Because you've created a special kind of disaster. I mean, Willy Wonka, just the name by itself

connotes happiness, right? It seems like it's fun to say Willy Wonka. Now you got a candy factory, and now you got screaming kids scared to death. Is he unknown? No! Yeah, because the unknown, look at the unknown. He's popping up from behind, yeah. You can hear the kids scared to death. No! Yeah, because the unknown, look at the unknown. He's popping up from behind, yeah.

You can hear the kids start to cry. No! All right, put it on the poll, Juju, please, at LeBatard Show. Who was crying more at the Willy Wonka experience? The children, the scared children, or the paid actors working in a sad warehouse? Turns out the unknown was a 16 year old girl and she was not happy with the script she was given. How did you guys handle these type of scary houses

when you were kids? Cause I was that jerk. Once I got to be like 15, 16, I would walk through with a straight face and when they tried to scare me, I would just look at them like, you didn't scare me. Oh, I was no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's the worst kind of like, just like, no,

not scared, not scared. The worst, I still am scared of the one in my neighborhood as a child, because the teenagers were intent on emerging from places that would horrify children, and they did it correctly, that I was 39 years old. Yeah, all right, yeah. Does not change.

We'll just wait for it. Does not change the fear of the experience. They were always in places I wasn't expecting. I know because I was one of those kids. Later in life, I enjoyed a great deal. In fact, I would say it's a great deal of fun to be the scarer in the haunted house as a teenager. To answer your question, Chris,

I was the kid who just kept their eyes like focused on the ground and was just like, I just need to get through this and be brave so my friends don't make fun of me for being too afraid to go in, because I was afraid. Wait, so you're saying, because I think you're stating the obvious, that it's more fun to scare kids than be the kid that gets scared? I am stating the obvious, you're correct.

It is an obvious point, but I am telling you that my childhood, Miramar, we had a famous haunted house in our neighborhood. And I remember it still 50 years later because the teenagers got great joy out of bleeping with the five year olds and the six year olds. And what they would do is they would scare the hell out of us by popping out of places. Again, we thought the house was haunted. No one told us that this was an illusion.

I was just beginning to understand Halloween. All of it, I'm a child. My innocence is being stolen by these teenagers, hiding in scary places in something that I think is haunted. Well, you were 39. I know, we've covered that already. It's my joke.

Can I have something to myself around here? Another fine. That costume. Tone. I've already been already before we move on from the penalty box because I haven't heard anything that much because I've been banished I just saw that the video team don't know how to spell unknown they call him uncown got there okay I'm glad you guys enjoy the video team, I love you. Okay, I'm glad you guys enjoy the video team spelling unknown uncown. They also spelled lumpa wrong.

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book your next travel experience at GetYourGuide.com Don Lebatard! You gotta know I'm a big Colombo guy. Salute to that boy. Okay, I don't think that's proof. I don't think that's proof. I think that's a lie. I don't think that's...

I don't think that is evidence. Salute to that boy. It suggests camouflage. It suggests that Juju has no idea what we're talking about. And now it's just googling it. Stugats! I'm not googling it. My grandmama stayed in the country.

I watched the Braves, I watched Colombo, I watched Matlock, I watched Andy Griffin. It's a little bit useful that you go to the penalty box, Dan. Dan take your ass to the penalty box. YouTube Juju! How you here, liar? YouTube Juju! Back to you, Stu. This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stu Gods.

I'm glad you guys appreciate us being generally in confident. If you want to be General Ambassador, I'm Budsman and Editor Juju. You don't have quite enough jobs around here, so you can help us with that as well. Juju is on a ridiculous gambling run, and I can't believe he made a pick yesterday after winning three straight three game parlays, I believe. And I went against him last night because I figured he was due to lose and he won again. It's unbelievable. You're that guy. Yes. You're. Oh, you're that guy. I regret being that guy. Oh, wait a minute.

So wait a minute. I went against Juju. Hold on. I'm sorry, Juju. I love you, man. You're not sorry. I am, so I lost money. Juju, but this is, ooh, so just to be clear,

you put your money on Juju failing. You put your money on Juju. To be fair, a lot of haters out there doing the same thing. They way of praying on my downfall, but just got to keep out I mean stay on our lane we're not racing and chief okay but you're surrounded by haters who are now wanting you to not win your next bet because you're 10 and oh and I you guys aren't shocked by this you guys aren't in any way surprised that Jessica you went home disappointed yesterday because you got an email from Stugats people he

didn't even make the request himself asking you to work for free on his book. I already forgot about that. Uh, you can you can you do today? Can you help me understand the pathology of the sports fan who would juju's nine and oh juju's feeling good juju technically I'm ten and oh right now but that's the main no no I'm saying no no I'm saying you're nine and oh at the time Stugots come sniffing around and he's jealous because oh, this is hot, I didn't make any money.

You know how I'm gonna make money? When he feels bad. I'm gonna fade him. I am going to bet against Juju being happy. I hope I come in tomorrow with money in my pocket because Juju has embarrassed himself in front of others right when people were rooting for him. But I need to know, it's very impressive.

I don't think it was anything personal, right? Stugots is just like the gambler's logic of like, oh, he's due, which is terrible. Right, there's no way. The due factor. Terrible, terrible. There's no way he's going ten and oh, and I actually liked LeBron at home against the game.

There is something. He's gonna get his instincts. There's something to be said for the due factor. Yes it is. Yeah. Always failing. Can't last forever, it is yeah always can't last forever I mean I can't believe you guys are all siding with two guys on Simply hating on juju and trying to make money off it that man if that's not hating what like it's fading No, all sorts of things also. It's fading when you're making it around people. You don't care about

Also, it's fading when you're making it around people you don't care about. It's not. It's hating. He believes in science. He's just going with the numbers. I bet you it's a better feeling for Juju that I didn't take his advice and lost my money than it would have been if I said, Hey, I'm riding you out here. Right. Thank you, Chris.

So he made it better. Yes. Pretty platinum. You get another chance to go against me today on Thursday Thunder with Drap Kings. He's in the kitchen right now, cooking it up. Shhh. He's due to lose. That is Stugot's logic, and that is always Stugot's winning.

He just turned that into an act of charity where he made this feeling even better for Juju by betting against him, and now he not only gets to win and go 10 ten and now he gets a victory over his public haters. We should be thanking Stu Gotts for what he did for you. You're welcome, Juju. There are a number of things in sports that I do want to get to Stu Gotts, including the game that the U.S. Women's National Team played in last night.

They played in a monsoon. It's always fun when the soccer ball just gets stuck in a pool of mud. Put it on the- The game gets slower. Put it away. Yeah, slightly slower at LeBatard show. Is it more fun when the soccer game gets stuck

in the puddle in the middle of the mud at midfield? Because this was a viewing pleasure. I don't think anybody would enjoy playing in that. It was a little, I wouldn't say it was all a pleasure because I think there were like legit concerns for player safety because the field conditions were that bad, but yeah it ended up being like almost comical watching how the ball moved. Anytime a player would fall there'd be just like a wave of water coming off of the grass. It was just ridiculous.

And then I'm going to extra time, which is like double the amount of having to watch players play in the shit. And then I went into PKs and the US one, Alyssa Nair saved three PKs. Witty was on the call, had a call for the ages, which I heard this morning because this game ended at like one AM Eastern, so let's be honest. I would sleep. Does video, or is it uncount, whether video has any,

whether video has for us something that would either show this game or Whittingham talking about this game, or the rights not available to us, so we just have to have second hand knowledge of how Whitty talked about this game that is currently on Count I think we can probably get away with playing the audio, but probably not the video But yeah, let's narrate made three saves in pks and made a pk

I think she will probably go down as like the greatest goalkeeper in US history tbd But she is an absolute Beast and wow Dan what a game people were trying to say this team was dead. This team of US soccer will never be the same. Now they're in the gold cup final against Brazil this weekend. And it was just being said it was dead because they ran out of gas in the last tournament

they played because it's hard being a dynasty for that long and Rapinoe misses a kick and all of a sudden they're not the dominant thing that beats everyone every single time because some of our players got old. Correct. I mean some of the criticisms of the U.S. soccer I think are totally valid but I also think that like it's these last two games the U.S. women's national team have played in this

tournament have been a couple of the best games they've played in a long time and so it's very heartening going into the Olympics this summer to see them playing at this level especially seeing new players on the field, new attackers, people that are scoring goals that haven't played before in international tournaments. So it's great. I'm super stoked about it. Do you think that they enjoyed playing in that?

Cause I'm looking at pictures of it now. And it's one of those things that the kids would enjoy playing in that, but them as professionals, I don't know, but it just looked insanely wet. So much fun. They had fun. Like splashing around around wet socks and wet cleats Oh, no afterwards. It's terrible. No, I know it stinks, but when you're in it like I know it's just a change of

Oh, I think I think Jessica's got this right that trying to do their job Well is hard enough physically on the body now doing it in conditions that are unpleasant when they don't trade it quite as Much as play like we do like they're they're doing surgical strikes on we do these things in Practices one thousand times so we get it right at this speed and now you've changed all our variables in a way that's on Everyone loves a slip-and-slide put it on the pole, please do you does everyone love a fair slide? When you're watching a snow NFL game, you're like oh that looks fun until you think about being tackled into a freezing ground, hard as concrete. Yeah, but as a kid growing up, like if you looked outside and it was snowing,

you wanted to play football. You did, I don't know if that changes as you get older. No, snow games were the best. When I grew up playing soccer, if it was like the slightest bit cool in the air, the slightest bit of dampness, I wanted to stay home. I hated that shit. And I grew up in Chicago, so the weather always sucked.

It was terrible. So is Stugots using dated information on snow from 50 years ago, thinking that kids actually still like to play games in the snow? I think I'm just a coward. I'm just sensitive to temperature changes. Since we talked so much about kids, Stugots, I wanted to ask you a question because we were talking about crying kids specifically.

And I saw a video the other day that delighted me because before we play this video, I just want to, I want to ask the group because I don't know if the group has seen this video. And I legitimately remember, Stugots, where I was when Peyton Manning crossed over for me as a personality where I was like, oh, this guy can be more than a quarterback. This guy has comedic timing. He knows how to

make fun of himself and a place where he can have a career evolution that will be fun for him as if he decides to act. And then one of the first times I saw him doing something on Saturday Night Live, he was puncturing his pristine image as the proper quarterback By just hitting kids with a football and knocking them over and it was funny every time because kids being hit with a football Or hit in the face with a ball is funny And now I present to you this video from not the scouting combine of a little kid running a route. Come on, come on, go get it. Come on, roll your route. OK. Oh, go get it.

Oh, go get it. Go get it. OK, ah. Oh. Oh, man. Hit right in the side of the head with the ball. Got to put your hands up. Always funny.

I maintain this. I am maintaining good. That is, Sturgans is absolutely right. That kid deserves blistering criticism. Get your hands up, kid. Don't get hit in the side of the head with the ball. You ran the route fine, but then you looked like a fool when the ball hit you right in the forehead It was a damn good route on it. It was a crisp route. Yes. It was tight route

Bad throw You've got to make that catch you have to get your you at the very least need to get your hands up didn't even throw the You have to get your, you at the very least need to get your hands up. Didn't even throw the hand. At the very least. Hands up. Got to adjust a little bit, slow down. Come on, come on. You got to help your corner back there.

Cadarius Tony would like a word. Yeah, put that in the corner and just play at the rest of the time because I do find kids being hit in the head with a football in a way that's totally harmless to be funny. Oh my goodness, Dan, sorry to wrap up the monotony right now, but we have sad news out of the NBA. Ben Simmons is out for the remainder of the season while he consults with specialists and explores treatments for options for the nerve impingement on his lower back. And it doesn't stop there, Daniel, it gets even worse. Minnesota All-Star Carl Anthony Towns

has been diagnosed with a torn meniscus in his left knee and is out indefinitely. So it's just tell the athletic and shams. Your nets. Wow. Their season has come undone since I said, I believe what I said is they're good. And then I walked it back to above average.

And then I looked at the standings and they were 19 and 32 and fired their coach. You're a coach killer. Yeah. And Stugatz hasn't let me forget it. And I appreciate that about him. Sorry. No, you're not. Oh, you are not.

Not in any way. But I got that one wrong. I did. I can admit it. The Nets are indeed not good. I, in hoping for something else for Ben Simmons, have wondered a number of things about him, a couple of things, right? Because this is one of the strangest careers I've seen.

Is clearly a number one in the world talent at his position, and his college team, his college team, his college team, can't win basketball games in either the NCAA tournament or the NIT, I think, didn't get into the NIT and everyone's telling me, that's the best pick in the draft, that's the future of the league, Ben Simmons, no such thing as someone who could guard

all the things that human being is. And since then, he has had an assortment of frailties that range from his back in the most generous of circumstances to his head if you're willing to be cruel about what that lifestyle does and what being Kardashian adjacent as a young person in sports does to what would appear an athlete succumbing in Philadelphia under the biggest of pressures like his teammate Markel Foltz who couldn't do it either when he was in Philadelphia that one of the great talents of our time a can't

miss prospect has been betrayed by his body and most people listening to this would say more so by his mind because this is a player that should be a franchise changer. This is a talent. Before Wembenyama got here and in between wherever it is the Dirk became and Carl Anthony Towns became people on the perimeter who made threes, this human being was supposed to be a sport changer as a bridge between LeBron and Wemba Nyama on what these people can do physically because there's not supposed to be a 6'10 or 6'11 person

who can handle a basketball that way. This is a guy as a rookie in the NBA. Played 81 games, averaged 16 points, had eight rebounds, eight assists, two steals and a block of game, and was considered one of the best defensive players in the NBA. I would love to watch an honest documentary on what happened to Ben Simmons. Not one meant for like, how's this going to look for Ben

Simmons among influencers? Like a really honest look at what happened to this person? Was it what sports did do his body or what sports did do his head? Maybe a combo of both, right? But the fact that the audience would answer, most of the audience would say to me, I don't think that kid's problem is with his back.

I wonder if he wants to play. And I wonder, does he want to play? And I'm doing that based on only, like it looks like he's scared and I understand why. Don Lebatard! David Samson, weirdo. Because he was not, he was not the fun substitute teacher who'd wheel out a TV and play a VHS tape Armageddon in science class.

He was the weird one who would eat an egg salad sandwich while clipping his toenails into the trash can and ranting about Ronald Reagan. Stugots! The guy kept talking about how his ass was smooth. Smoother than a newborn's cheek. He wouldn't stop bragging about his bare buttocks to me. This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugatz. I know that I over-explained the show and I know that Lucy, I just penalized you for letting people look behind the curtain in a way that is not acceptable to me because I'd like to keep certain things around here hidden.

But one of the things I can no longer keep hidden is the fact that David Sampson is entitled to a whole lot of his gripes about metal-arc media when he perpetually feels like he's left on the outside of things that we are doing, just generally as a show. He's working very hard on nothing personal. It's exceptional. People like it. It is award-winning. And he's doing it off in this corner, working very hard every morning doing a daily show by himself.

Not a lot of people are doing that. But then when he comes over here, there's some discomfort and some reluctance. And he says, hey, I want to be a lot of people are doing that but then when he comes over here there's some discomfort and some reluctance and he says hey I want to be a part of this world and now he's throwing a party on Sunday and here's the problem that I have he's here today to do a top five list with adnan I think and I'm not sure but I will ask Lucy and Jessica this question does the segment adnan and David Samson reviewing movies in a way that is more thorough than I hear anyone reviewing movies is that a segment that is working I believe it is failing because I believe every movie they choose is from 50 years ago no comment they just need some sauce

in the middle like we said uh billet check and saving show might need a snoop dog it might need a guy like me to come along and help review some movies as well as them guys. So we can review some hood movies as well. I would love to hear Adnan's take on Don't Drink a Juice in South Central while being something in the hood. Don't be a menace.

Yeah. Maybe we should have some sort of like audition on Sunday where Juju takes over for them and if he does a better job, maybe we replace both of them. No replacements. We love our brothers and my brother. By the way, perfectly quaffed hair today, David Simpson. Oh my God, you are glowing brother.

But I think that's an idea we might need to doggy ear. This is the pre-Oscar cut. I got it yesterday, so I'm fresh for Sunday's party. So let me explain to the audience. That's so strange, man. Well, let me, you say it's strange, but here's what I admire about David, okay? You say it's strange. A pre-Oscar cuts.

No, that's not what I admire, not that part. What the part that I admire is, he cares so much about being valuable to this company that he's throwing a party that no one here wants for seven hours on Sunday, and he's invited all of us. And it feels like some show might break out around what he's doing, but what you guys have to understand is he's taking Sunday very seriously. He's not here for our hijinks.

Him and Adnan love the movie so much that we will be a distraction to them talking about other shit, that we will be a distraction to them talking about other shit and and we will not respect either David's beliefs about craft or David himself if we don't come to this party and actually try to help him where is Adnan he's at spring training he's supposed to be joining us right he just text me is interviewing Randy Rosarino. All right. This is another thing that makes David Samson insane. Matt Namberg is always late and we're always late onboarding David Samson.

David, you find it a disrespect every time. Do you not? That we make you wait even two seconds when you're always here punctually. You are never late. I just would like you to start when you tell me you're gonna start. But what's even funnier about Sunday's party is that Mike Ryan's done a great job trying to herd cats

and get you guys involved and interested. And I came up with an idea on one of the pre-production calls yesterday, just yesterday, that we're doing a contest for all of your listeners. All they have to do is go to lebatardaf.com, fill out an Oscar ballot, and if you win, you're gonna get a really cool prize, some extra stuff,

and if you beat me, then I'm gonna throw in a nice piece of memorabilia and something from my collection. But this is a way to do business, and there's zero support. Mike Ryan, I love him. He said, run with that, David. And so I worked with Russ Gilbert and new voodoo starting yesterday at 6pm. And guess what? We're live on levitarraff.com. Fill out that bracket right now and try to beat me if you can. Okay, I'd like to know how to best support you right now as we wait for Adnan, who is speaking. Now, I didn't think Randy Orozorania's English

was all that great. I thought he did most of his interviews in Spanish. Adnan Burke does not speak Spanish, does he not? He does not. Okay, so that's good. You know what, I speak Oscars, and I can't wait to sign up for David Simpson's new promo at lebatardaf.com.

Juju, you are perpetually positive sales. I appreciate that. Juju's got his own collection at lebatardaf.com that you should check out. And David, I just want to understand because you were a bit vague there, okay? If you're promising some version of our show is going to show up to do our show with you for seven hours live on Sunday. You need to be more specific about what your prizes are and I will tell the group here having seen David's work as the former Marlins president when David does stuff like this with his own

memorabilia collection the stuff that that he has just laying around the house is super valuable stuff that he gives to charity that gets lots of money. If there's a winner, he should allow that winner to walk into his house and select the piece of memorabilia that he wants, or she. Oh no. And if Juju's the winner, he gets David's job.

Oh never that, no, I just wanna be able to sit in the chair one time, the glove chair. Can I just sample the chair, brother? That's the thing that comes with it. You should get the chair. Yeah. J to sit in the chair one time the glove chair Can I just sample the chair brother that's a little chair? juju juju I would love you to come to sit in this chair and believe me Contrary to what half the people in your company think Dan I am not after anyone's job and you can all have my job because I care so much about Metal arc and lebatard AF calm and you. And I just keep getting thumbs on the neck. And at some point I get a little hurt,

but I just keep going, barrel through. So this party Sunday, we're gonna do seven hours. Me, Adnan Verk and Ben Lyons. We're gonna do pregame. We're gonna do a watch along during the Oscars, which started at 7 p.m. Eastern. You're gonna get picks. We have special guests.

And the hope is that you will all join in your Oscar tuxes and Oscar gowns and come on the air to talk about your favorite movies. But am I counting on it? Please, Dan, I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid. Okay, just one last thing to promote this for the audience because we've never done anything like this before. And I will say this in a moment of total transparency that David, after a year here, I didn't realize that he's been here a year, David has forced this upon the company, a seven hour party that is live on YouTube, that I'm not sure how much anyone around here

wants to actually attend and he's making it as easy as humanly possible for us saying, never mind, we're gonna do seven straight hours. If you guys just wanna come around, sit around and eat, you don't even have to be bothered to wear a tux. But we'd prefer if you respected what we were doing. He's working really hard to create something here that will be a pretty fun livestream if we participate. If not, you're putting him, Adnan and Ben Lyons in a position where they have to talk about

movies for seven hours straight, which they can do very well but may not be as entertaining as you guys want. It was their idea. They're putting themselves in that position if no one else shows up. Look, Adnan getting ready. He probably talking somewhere right now. He good. He could feel three hours if we, Adnan getting ready. He probably talking something down where right down now. He good. He could feel three hours if we need Adnan to feel it.

But I am a lot. Actually, it's not one movie. Yes. Right. You got it a little wrong. Our dream was to do this live from the red carpet. But the entire budget for Metal Arc got blown on Vegas. So then we pivoted to live from the stained carpet

at the Elcer. All right. Potato, potato. Potato. Can we just point out that Dan really likes having that little cane to wave around while he's talking? You do. He has Wonka bars in his pockets.

He enjoys that a lot. I am enjoying this part of the costume. I've never enjoyed with these grid of death punishments much of any of it, even though you guys always make it a kink. But this, I can do some stuff with this. Like what? Like what?

Top five things you can do with that wand. I can do all of them with this. If you think it's a kink, all of them can be done with my magic wand. What candy bar is Dan? I say the Milky Weight. Wow. Too soon. Too soon.

I say the fourth Muskete. Wow. Too soon. Too soon. I say the fourth musketeer. Wow, David. Oh, wow. Snackers. Really? Thousand pound bar? The one pound bar? That doesn't work.

The one pound bar. The one pound bar, What do you not understand? The one-pound bar? I was trying to make you feel better, Dan. I could have said the one-kilo bar. Neither of those are funny. That's the kind of entertainment you will get for seven straight hours. If we don't show up.

And Ben Lyons. That's right. If we don't show up. Oh, look, look who showed up. Look. Oh, yes. Old Bedhead Burke here. Yeah, squeezing us in between his other 10 assignments. Atten End Burke, the segment is over.

You've got an Oscar party on Friday to attend. You're joining us from Ray's Spring Training. You're almost here. You interviewed Randy Rosarania, who I didn't think his English was great, and I thought you would have done a better interview in Spanish. Okay Okay you're there to correct me. I understand. What are you going to give us in that's my favorite team in the

sport. Tampa Bay the Reyes are my favorite team in the entire sport. They they a big turn in the playoffs last year but I thought that they could have beaten anyone last year and you're joining us live from there to promote what you're doing on Sunday with Samson because we're worried it's not gonna, we're worried you two are gonna talk too much and not have enough sparks and friction and fun stuff. Thankfully, Rosa Reina had a translator,

Manny was fantastic. I've seen her interview Kevin Cash right now. Make sure you join us on Sunday. There's Kevin Cash right now with Jake P.V. That's all I have to say. It's gonna be an awesome show. You guys are the best. Take care. Okay, great.

It was very important. It was very important. Not Cash with awesome show. You guys are the best. Take care. Okay. Great. You want me to sabotage my career for this? Yes. Cash is waiting. Literally, he's waiting here. Before you go, Adneck, can you do America one favor? Turn your phone sideways. It's one time. Yeah.

All right. One time. There you go. Juju. Oh my God. Beautiful. Beautiful. All right.

Listen, pass along the cash for me. Just real quick before you go. Before you go, just pass along the cash for me, OK? I watched more Raze games than anyone in Florida last year. Oh, get out of here, Dicky V. More than Kevin Cash. And what I'm telling you is that Kevin Cash, that team betrayed me in the playoffs and made me look like an asshole

because they were so bad in the playoffs You tell him send my regards. He's gone. He already hung up. Okay. Well, then he's not gonna play I mean he respects baseball too much. What was that sound? Jojo, what are you laughing about? Sneezed Who who who sneezed who coughed where there was a stray snag was it Adnan? Right before leaving, did Adnan sneeze? Might have been his dismount, I think, yeah. Well, Samson has my Venmo if it was him, he knows where to send the fine money.

All right, we didn't do this correctly. Sunday, David, I hope that you get a turnout there. We will promote it for you. I hope that, I know you care deeply about both this event and fitting in here at Metal Arc, so I appreciate what you're doing this weekend. Just go to lebatardaf.com right now. The Oscar ballot is live, fill it out

and try to beat me in Adnan. Good luck, we'll see you Sunday live at 4 p.m. Eastern. And David, without over promising, big prize, correct? Because your memorabilia collection is tremendous. Only if you can beat me. Also, SuperCinrafile coming soon with JuJu Gotti and David Sampson. Ha ha ha.