The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - Local Hour: Worst Mistake

Episode Date: August 29, 2025

"Until fluid is coming out of all of my orifices." Welcome to French Frydays with Dan Lé Batárd and Jeremy Taché. The crew breaks down the Michael Parson trade, and Tony does Math before the group listens to this year's Suey Award Nominees for Worst Mistake. Today's cast: Dan, Chris, Billy, Frank Azaria, Jeremy-but-not-really, Lamar Jackin', Lou Bacharach, Marvy Povich, Mike, Ned Gretzky, Roy, and Tony. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Look, every football game is a grind, and if you're like Dan and the crew, you know there's no such thing as one size fits all. Your sleep should be just as custom as coach's game plan. That's where sleep number comes in. You get to call your own plays. Softer, firmer, cooler, warmer, your side, your comfort, change it whenever you want. No more feeling stuck like a busted play. And for all the late night fights over the thermostat, climate series cools up 20 times faster than the competition. True temp betting kicks heat and humidity to the sidelines so you can.

actually stay chill all night long. Bottom line, sleep number is like having a sleep coach in your corner, adjusting to you all night because your best game starts with the right rest. Why choose a sleep number smart bed? So you can sleep just the way that you like. The only bed that lets you make each side firmer or softer whenever you like. Your sleep number setting. Sleep number's biggest sale of the year is here.

All beds on sale. Up to 50% off the limited edition smart bed, limited time, exclusively at a sleep number store near you. Sleep number, official sleep and wellness partner of the NFL, see store or sleepnumber.com for details. Wait, was that the group chat? Ah, sent a text to the group that definitely wasn't for everyone. You're good.

Enjoy some goldfish cheddar crackers. Goldfish have short memories. Be like goldfish. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show.

Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow show. Shadow in it. Shadowing it. Am I going to ruin the vibes on Friday?

I'm a little worried about... You have already. It's a solid six months. Where's Hawkins? I already ruined it. I just... I said a sentence. Yesterday, he made a whole big thing.

And guess what? For football season, I'm here every Friday. Thinking that that was going to be, like, well-received. The audience, I think, likes it. We like ball here on Fridays. If you say dirty at all this show, I'm going to wring your neck. Oh, wow. The ringing of the neck.

Well, I already threatened to kill ESPN. The ring, but, okay, first of all, ringing of the neck, that is you're going to hang me? Is that the ring? No, man. Again, here you get go. It's like Homer Simpson to BART. Vibe check. How's it going over there, Tom?

Not good. If you ring someone's neck, so this is the only time you're like squeezing out a cloth that has water in it. The ringing of a cloth, that's the verb. But your neck. But your neck. So that's what you're going to do to my neck.

You're going to grab it like a wet towel and you're going to squeeze it. You've not seen what Homer Simpson does the bar. It's going to be a long. season. Why you little? Until the juices come out of my every orifice. The first question was like, are you going to hang me? No. If I were going to hang you, I'd say I'd hang you. I need a heavy rope. You are getting very comfortable with body shaming people. I mean, what you did to Zaslo yesterday when you're just you're just burying him for the amount that he is

eating. Why are you so comfortable with this? I am never comfortable. not Chris. That was you. That was you. No. It was entirely you. I'm calling people fat Chris. It was absolutely. It was absolutely not me. It was Chris Cody who went right. I said that I could still smell the breakfast off Zaz when he sang in my ear. That's what I said, an hour later. That's me starting it. That I could still smell the breakfast coming off of his singing voice that was still sticking to me. That's me starting. We're not going to get to Micahars. No, no. Today you want to get to that?

Billy, I don't have confidence in what Greg Cody's about to try here. Oh, this again. Yeah, what? Go on. Look, every football game is a grind. And if you're like Dan and the crew, you know there's no such thing as one size fits all. Your sleep should be just as custom as coach's game plan. That's where sleep number comes in.

You get to call your own plays. Softer, firmer, cooler, warmer, your aside, your comfort. Change it whenever you want. want. No more feeling stuck like a busted play. And for all the late night fights over the thermostat, climate series cools up 20 times faster than the competition. True temp betting kicks heat and humidity to the sidelines so you can actually stay chill all night long. Bottom line, sleep number is like having a sleep coach in your corner, adjusting to you all night because your best game starts with the right rest. Why choose a sleep number smart bed?

So you can sleep just a way that you like. The only bed that lets you make each side firmer or softer whenever you like. Your sleep number setting. Sleep number's biggest sale of the year is here. All beds on sale. Up to 50% off the limited edition smart bed. Limited time. Exclusively at a sleep number store near you.

Sleep number, official sleep and wellness partner of the NFL. See store or sleep number.com for details. The rivalries, the bands, the upsets, college football is back. Think you know the game? Put it to the test with drafting sportsbook and turn picks into big payouts. New customers bet five.

$5 and get $300 in bonus bets instantly. With live betting, rivalry week boosts, and more, Draft King Sportsbook has everything you need to own your Saturday. Download the Draft King Sportsbook app and use code Dan. That's code Dan for new customers to get $300 in bonus bets instantly when you bet just $5. In partnership with Draft King's Sportsbook, The Crown is yours. Gambling problem, call 1-800 gambler.

In New York, call 8778 Hope and Y or text Hope and Y in 467. 369. In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-78-9-7777 or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly on behalf of Boot Hill Casino and Resorting, Kansas. 21 and over. Agent eligibility varies by jurisdiction, Void in Ontario. Bonus bets expires seven days after issuance. Four additional terms and responsible gaming resources, see dkng.com. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stugats podcast. Do I think he's going to pull it up? It's time to put on a suit and roll out.

Crank up the best time of the year. It's the best time of the year. So keep your dial right. here. It's me and you and me again at the suey's The greatest of life's mistakes and best revelations For up to you buy the greatest

beer It's the best time of the year So keep your dial right here It's me and you and me again at the sooes And every day you're gonna go to a website To vote on the sounds that brought you cheer Because it's the best time of the year So keep your dial right here

It's me and you It's me again and it's you It's me and you and me again At the Suey's That kind of thing Why do we have to run everything into the ground we can't stop short of making the joke something that bothers everybody why are you still sitting here staying there i thought you were off today

wasn't he off today he was off today this is the new fridays dan i'm always on this fits for me dan and jeremy friday i see this i'm out of here i've been trying to get to a marlin story with jeremy all week i'm not going to do it the day after micha parsons gets traded get out of here all right love you too thank you for coming in on your off day to feed your best time of the year feed your inner theater. So keep you down right here.

Tashay and Levitard, French Fridays. Yes. But for Dan, French Friday. Cote. That's good. I like French fries are good. It's not.

It's not as good. Maybe the name, but the product. I don't know. No, that's the problem. Yes, it's all in a name. You're correct. The product itself would not be good. A handful of things to say

about something that you just hardly ever see. That player, Micah Parsons, does not get traded at that age. I know he's not LeBron James, but one of the reasons LeBron James trade was such a giant story is because that player does not get traded at that age in sports. It's why the Luca thing is such a big story, because nothing you get back in that trade, nothing you ever get back and that trade is going to be as good as what you already had. That thing is so valuable. The pass rush is so valuable, and he's better at it than anybody. Miles Garrett, to my eye, is better, but by the metrics, Micah Parsons is better at getting at the quarterback with pressure than anybody in the league. He's L-T-ish in the way that he can get to the quarterback, and you just

don't get to say that about anybody. So that player never gets traded. But I believe everybody's sort of missing why this trade was made as we're talking about Jerry Jones's senility. And we're talking about whether he got along with his agent and a bunch of other things that aren't what I thought this was about. And it's not about Jerry Jones wanting attention. The two biggest reasons this happened. And I don't know which one you guys would choose from among these two reasons. These are the two biggest reasons. One is the two teams in your division at quarterback are younger and better and are going to be younger and better for the next 10 years. One of them because they have a quarterback who can do it without a lot of help.

The other one, because he's got so much help around him, that they're both going to keep showing that Dak Prescott was drafted where he was for a reason. So that's reason number one. Reason number two is this. And I don't think anybody's talking about this particular thing here. Tony, can you get for me, please, the game logs from last year for the Dallas Cowboys and what they did at home and the point totals they allowed at home when it wasn't Schottenheimer rebuilding. It was Mike McCarthy, we're win now off of 12 wins. At home, give me the point total scores and the result of all the home games Dallas played last year

because I don't know if you guys remember. I don't know what you'd say off the top of your head was the single most stunning result for you last season, but I do remember Saints going into Dallas and putting up 40-something point to beat Dallas was among the most, the largest surprises I saw last year. That was week two. That was the home opener for Dallas

and they got beat 4419 to a Saints team that everybody's like, okay, I guess they're decent and the bottom fell out for the Saints. A little bit of context for Dallas' season last year. Eight games with Dak, he got hurt the hamstring, he was out. Within those home games, they went two and six. They had a two-point win and a seven-point win. Those are the only wins they had all season. So, point totals they gave up. 44 to New Orleans. 28 to Baltimore. 47 to Detroit. 34 to Philadelphia. That was the first

game without Dak Prescott. Cooper rushed through for 45 yards total in the entire game. They gave up 34 to Houston, 27, excuse me, 20 in a win to New York, they gave up 27 to Cincinnati, they gave up 24 in a win to Tampa Bay, and they gave up 23 and a loss to Washington. And those numbers, when you see what the Dallas defense was doing when Michael was out there, when he wasn't out there, those numbers aren't going to make up what is your architectural gap. Before we get to the meat of this, though, you guys have seen some of the large numbers that are being thrown around on metrics by Bill Barnwell and others, right? I mean, because I can simplify this for you. Bill, I can give you a whole bunch of data that says dig deep on all the advanced metrics and the way these people make measurements, or I can just tell you that Bill Barnwell says that mathematically, when Micah Parsons is on the field, they are purpose.

play the best defense in the league and when he's not they're the worst like that like he can do it's an obvious oversimplification but he can do it with the numbers to show you something that's appalling if jerry jones is right now celebrating what has been 30 years of failure for that franchise in a Netflix documentary and the starting point on that celebration and all the division between him and jimmy johnson is they cannot agree who's responsible for the herschel Walker trade that brought back the draft picks when they had the genius idea of we're not good enough. So let's trade our best player because we're not good enough because they're just doing the same thing here. They're trading their most valuable asset because the way to close

the gap between Philadelphia and Washington in this, a rebuilding year for the Cowboys, is to use those draft picks and try to close the gap. Micah Parsons wasn't going to, this is the way that Michael Parsons helps you most the next two seasons if you're the Dallas Cowboys. because they're not actually close. They were really terrible against the run. They were 29th against the run. And in that division, when he played the Eagles twice, and a mobile quarterback and Jane Daniels twice,

Jerry Jones spoke to this. That's why they got Kenny Clark and two first-round draft picks. I'm shocked that Jerry Jones made this deal, but also he did pretty well because Kenny Clark does help where they're weakest. And Jerry Jones already said, like, everyone assumes we're going to keep these draft picks. We can use these draft picks to add to our team. This is Jerry Jones's spin on it. Run defense.

You're not stopping Philadelphia from running the ball with or without Micah Parsons. They run the ball. It's why they're champions. They run it against everybody. It's why Jalen Hertz looks the way he does. You're right, though, that the problems with what it is that I, just said for the Cowboys is it's not just that Philadelphia and Washington are better than you, obviously. It's the way they're better. They're younger and more stable at quarterback.

They have a future that doesn't have defenses that allow those point totals. Guys, those were the home games. Your defense, 44, 28, 47, 34, 34, 37, 34, 24, 27, I don't care who you're quarterback is? That didn't happen to Pittsburgh when they don't get the quarterback playing. Those numbers at home. I understand Michael Parsons didn't play in some of the games, but that's the problem. Like, Dak Prescott can't correct that, nor can run defense, by the way. Like, okay, fine, Michael Parsons, you just, the way that you try to neutralize is you run right at him instead of trying to pass around him. And I think a couple of years ago, there was a bit of a mask on the Dallas defense because

they created so many turnovers that that masked some of the inefficiencies that they were having on corner safety and defensive line that it was like, oh, Dallas's defense is actually really good. And then the bottom fell out again for the last two years. But let me be clear on what we just saw yesterday because I'm not allowed to act unsurprised by this. We've been talking for weeks about, oh, Jerry likes the noise of this and then he caves at the end. He always does that. Mike is not going anywhere. In the stunning of what happened yesterday, because Jerry Jones has to correct all of this. One, you just traded away someone that I can absolutely make the argument

is the best defensive player you've ever had. I can make that argument now, rest of his career unseen. I can also make this argument, and this is the problem that Jerry Jones has as he refuses stubbornly and arrogantly to let go of some of the reins on his league, as if his family is special about, creating football teams. If I said to you right now, I'm going to give any NFL executive that you ever have thought

of, incompetent or otherwise, whoever it is, Urban Meyer, whoever it is, I'm going to give you 30 years in that job. Am I getting more or fewer than two playoff wins? Yeah, that's a good point. I understand it. that being said, I don't think he did poorly if he has to give up a generational player. He did poorly.

No, getting Michael Parsons is the hard part. Being so incompetent that you have to trade him because you haven't built well enough around him is the problem. They didn't have to trade him. They could have paid him. And Michael Parsons' statement was hilarious. I didn't make any demands. Brother, that's how this whole thing started.

You made a very strong demand. It wasn't a request. You have to trade him if everything else I just said is true. You have to him because you're not going to make up the gap with him because look at how bad you were with him. Oh, I'm not going to pretend like I know what is going to happen in that

division. Historically, people go from bottom to top a ton. Oh, but that defense can get better and the dolphins can get better without making it the right decision. They're not going to win the championship this year. They're in play. The standard there is every year we play

for the championship. They may get better. They might. Like, I really think their defense can't be Worse? Like, worse than that, you cannot be. So, they get better. They win 10 games. And what? Jaden Daniels is still in your division? Now, maybe Jaden Daniels gets hurt, but the Eagles are still in your division. What I was beginning to say about the problem that they have is it's not just that it's Philadelphia and Washington in your division.

It's the way those teams play and they're built. Like, it's not, they're going to beat you this season and they're going to beat you next season, whether Michael Parsons is there or not, because I don't trust Dak Prescott to be better than what it is that they have now both those teams in stability at their quarterback. And you don't either. None of you listening to this. If I just make it, hey, the draft evaluations were right.

Skill sets, Jalen Hertz, and Jaden Daniels have skill sets that Dak Prescott does not have made by the measurements that they do with the draft by these scientists, who if I gave any of them 30 years would win more than two playoff games, assessing talent. any of them. Mike Tannenbaum. I give him 30 years. Mike Tannenbaum may have won more playoff games than Jerry Jones in the last 30 years. Consecretive years. He made it to AFC

championship games. You got to win more than that. And is it two playoff wins? I don't even know. Is it one? Like, how many playoff games have them? It might be one. I think they, Rome will beat Minnesota one time. Did they beat the Lions? Did they beat the Lions in a playoff game? Whatever the playoff number is, give me. You think we'd know them since they were so few. Who is the, give me the person, the human being that you were to say, is the worst football executive in the history of the league? Chris Greer. No. Joe Banner was pretty bad in Cleveland. Just Holmgren was pretty bad in Cleveland. Pretty much everybody's been pretty

bad in Cleveland except for Andrew Barry and then he gave out the worst contract ever. At Lebitard show, if I put the worst executive in the history of football in charge for 30 years, would he win more than two playoff games? Yes or no? They have four wins since 2009 in the playoffs, and three since 14, 2014. Wait a minute, what? They have three wins in the playoffs since 2014. In 2014, they beat the Lions. In 2018, they beat the Seahawks, and in 2022, Dak beat the Bucks. On the Walkout round. Yeah, forgot that Seahawks won. So they've won three playoff games? I don't think Dax been there at 14, so Dack, I think, his one, too, right?

They've never gotten out of the divisional round. That's crazy. They're living off of 30 years ago, and Billy's worried about Jerry Jones, like, concerned about him. He came in here concerned for Jerry Jones. Well, did you see the press conference yesterday of Jerry Jones when he was talking about the trade? I saw that it was 42 minutes. Well, Jerry, who, you know, likes to get out there in front of everyone to kind of, you know, show his face and say this is why we did what we did, was struggling a bit in the press conference where he continuously was calling Micah Michael. And then Stephen Jones had to then come in and say it's Micah.

And then Jerry Jones later on would just continue to say Michael. And then at some point he would correct himself and say Micah. Michael, no, Micah, Micah, but there was an issue where, you know, kind of confusing the player a little bit. He's been calling him Michael for years. Yeah. I think, he genuinely thinks his name is Michael the way that you think it's Jordan. The white chocolate macadamia cream cold brew from Starbucks is made just the way you like it. Handcrafted cold foam topped with toasted cookie crumble.

It's a sweet summer twist on iced coffee. Your cold brew is ready at Starbucks. Oh, this is it, the day you finally ask for that big promotion. You're in front of your mirror with your Starbucks coffee. Be confident, assertive, remember eye contact, but also remember to blink. Smile, but not too much, that's weird. What if you aren't any good at your job? What if they demo you instead?

Okay, don't be silly, you're smart, you're driven, you're going to be late if you keep talking to the mirror. This promotion is yours. Go get them. Starbucks, it's never just coffee. Don Lebertard I read his lips and it sounded like He was saying what you want to fight me now But I'm telling you if you look

We can play a game right now The lips look the same on fight you And failure Watch my lips I'm gonna turn off my mic No I just look in here I'm gonna send one of these two And I want you guys to tell me

If I'm saying fight you Yeah yeah Or failure Okay yeah yeah Stugats Why are your idea is always so bad For the podcast It's like a bad audio

Big swings, Grace. Is this a character that you have now? Heat of the mind, guys. Just that's the audio. Here we go. Do it again. Fight you. That was fine.

Maybe you can't tell. Oh my God. We got to the bottom of it. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. At the beginning of the Cowboys documentary, Paul Taglibu introduced the Dallas Cowboys first. ground pick, Mitchell Irvin. Wide receiver

out of the University of Miami, Mitchell Irvin. Some folks are just bad with names. I have a clip of him calling him Michael Parson. Ooh, the double of getting the first name wrong and eliminating or adding an S. That happened to me as soon as I got to 50.

They gave it to me as a gift on my 50th birthday, those two things. Of all the players that I've ever negotiated with, Michael Parson is as savvy and knowledge and understanding of his financial business relative to football as any player I've ever been around. Yeah, Michael Parson. He just traded Michael Parson.

Michael Parson. I'm sure, I'm sure. Michael Parson is a kicker, right? It's a good haul for Michael Parson. Michael Parson is a kicker. Imagine if he was right and he had someone named Michael Parson who was just like, you know, like a scout team player or whatever. And, you know, the Packers are like, I don't think sure he knows what he's doing. He's telling us he's trading as Michael Parsons.

Michael Parsons. And all of a sudden, they have the introductory press conference. He's like, who the hell is that guy? He's like, I'm Michael Parsons. Put it on the poll, plays at Lebitard show. Is Michael Parsons the name of a kicker? Yes or no. Michael Carson.

It's a totally different player. Michael, no one fears Michael Parsons. Michael Parsons could put up exactly the same stat line as Michael Parsons and would be lightly regarded. Michael Parson. I've got him working in insurance, Mr. Parson. Just generally in insurance? Yeah.

Middle management? Like, what is he doing? Or is he selling stuff door to doors? Not happy. He's not happy. Whatever it is, Dan, he's not happy about it. Well, he's not happy. It's not inspiring work that Michael Parson does when he goes in the office.

Like you drive by and it's like a state farm. It says Michael Parson. Michael Parson. The weather for my. Miami, Notre Dame is going to be scary. It's going to be wet and a lot of thunder and lightning is being projected. That's the forecast now. Forecast can change, but I genuinely don't know who that helps.

If we're judging off a blast here, I mean, it would be easy to say. This helps Jeremiah Love who'd probably run for 300 yards against Miami. But they did reshape their defense. And if the weather is bad, you'd think that means it's a trenches game. and the reputation is Notre Dame always has a good offensive line. But I would say that Miami is actually girthier, bigger, more athletic on the outside, especially on the edge. That defensive line actually plays to a strength of Miami, you would think just by body types. And the offensive line, as we know, is certainly a strength for Miami.

Do you guys like these kinds of games? Because I like the elements to not be involved at all. I don't want snow. I want offense. and I want speed to be unencumbered. I don't want the rain, even though I could see how it might help Miami, just because I think Miami's true advantage come Sunday night will be that crowd with a holiday the very next morning being unhinged.

I don't want it thunderstorming on that crowd. Okay, well, yeah, I don't think. I do not believe that Miami, the city, in its history, has the level of discomfort required when you go out to stay in that stadium full and loud if it is raining the entire time? It is covered now. The seats are covered and that will help a large chunk. I think close to 85% of the seats will be covered. A small percentage of the lower level will get wet.

Yeah. But you want people working up a lather throughout. the throughout the day. And if the weather is bad, I don't know how crazy people can get. But yeah, it's tough to say. Look, the quarterback hasn't played for Notre Dame. This is hard. We know that they were a good team last year. We know that they have a good secondary. We know that the running back is really good. We know that they added to a wide receiver core that certainly thought of as better than Miami's. I don't really know where this game will play out if the weather does indeed impact it. I'm just going to stick to my guns and say,

We're going to rip their freaking heads off. Miami hurricanes or either Miami sugar cubes that melt with water. Like, what's going on here? Embrace this weather. Say, you know what? I want this bad weather. I want Notre Dame to come in here and be uncomfortable. What are we, what are you?

It's going to rain so you can't go to the game? That's crazy. You guys believe that a crowd that I immerse before the game in two hours of rain so you cannot tailgate that is milling about indoors before the game. to stay out of the weather, you guys believe that we as a city, just general temperament of the human beings who go to football games around here, you think we have 80,000 strong of noise for a Sunday night game that won't embarrass Miami if the rain is so bad that it makes it so that nobody who's listening to this inside or outside of Miami would want to go to a football

game. Like I'm not even, you understand what we're what we're possibly headed toward just because the weather is going to be shitty. Dan, I don't think you understand this, but you've been on this side, on the, on the glass side, on the high up side, too long. You don't think that there's 80,000 strong that are going to go out there. Have you seen only

in Dade where there's a terrible rainstorm and there's people running in the streets jumping into the water in the streets outside of club space? Have you not seen that, Dan? Imagine that times 80,000 with about 8,000 Miller lights, okay? Unstoppable force me the movable object, bam.

One Miller light. It's not enough per person for every 10 people. I'm saying 80,000, well, responsibly. Thank you. No, well, that's too, that's too responsible. That's not going to get people the excited that you think it's going to be when it's one for every 10 people. I'm trying to be nice with the sponsors, guys. No, but you were bad.

Drink responsibly is always one of the eggs. I make jokes about this. It's a cause close to my heart. Thank you. And they are the proud suey. I'm not making fun. He was nice with the sponsor. Thank you.

He was not nice with the Matt. The math is what's in the way. What do you care about the math? God, Bill Barton was hosting the show. Exactly right. You talk to your math friends. Who cares? Math, schmath.

All right. Get an ice cold cooler, put some ice in it, throw some Miller lights, put some stuff on the grill. Even if it rains, doesn't matter. I saw today one of the craziest things I've ever seen coming into the studio where I didn't call the authorities, but I did think about calling because I was like, someone's going to get hurt where I was driving past the airport and, uh, there was a gentleman whose car was in the lane for like broken down cars and he was in that lane.

And then I saw what I thought was him. He very clearly was on, you know, live or he was FaceTiming someone or doing something, screaming at the top of his lungs. And he's just showing off where he is, which is like you're on the 836 with the airport behind you. And there's just standstill traffic. What are we? What's this flexor? And he's screaming at Spanish, like, ah, like showing off where he was.

and then I think I saw him take a shot and then maybe start smoking a cigar and I was like, what's going on here, sir? It's like 7.45 in the morning. What are we doing? And then I was like, I think I should tell someone what's going on here. But traffic wasn't moving.

Very crazy Friday for that guy so far today. What he was doing is just Miami. Yeah, well, get back in that car, though. Get back in that car and head to Hard Rock Stadium. We're going to need you. Get there by Sunday responsibly. That's right. Miami is an event town

I can't speak to what the crowd's going to look like against Bethune but I can speak with authority but it's going to look like Sunday it's going to look like 2017 Is that a happen to know? Hold on a minute you can speak with authority that's a different category there's a happen to know

I don't know what the category is what's the hierarchy with you on when you're saying a thing that would be the equivalent of on my life I will take away this draft party on my granddaughter's life I will take away that draft party Did he do, did he host the draft party? Yeah. Oh yeah, it happened. Okay, great. And Graceland's fine.

She's good. All right, perfect. Yeah, I know the tickets had been sold for this. Oh, my God, he knows. He happens to know. Come, everyone. Come and listen. Happens to know. He happens to know. Well informed. Do you have an issue with the, uh, the gates opening.

You know, there's certain, the green lot opens up five hours before. The regular lot's open four hours before. However, historically, the athletic department does put in a call occasionally for the really big games and ask for an earlier... Got to do early, yeah. This is a challenge to Dan Redikovic in the Miami Athletic Department to really put the pressure on Hard Rock Stadium and let's open those gates over there.

I need to be there first thing in the morning. I need to stumble out of Lasrosis and straight to Hard Rock Stadium. How about some of the Hummer just drive through the gate, let everybody in? Exactly right now you're getting the right idea. Let's not do this. Yeah, drive through the gate responsibly. I want, okay, I want to get back to Tony's bed. Mad math. I can't do it right now because he had a Miami party starting with one in ten

people getting a single beer. One tailgate had eight thousand beers. You weren't doing the math. I'll get back to it. And I will get to the Suey Award in a second as well. But before I do that, Big Mac, it's been a while since we heard from Big Mac who is handling things in our carport. He is somebody that Chris hasn't done a lot of new imaging. Okay. Some of that you just heard happened to know. Oh my God, he knew him. And this is some of his other new imaging. So we're getting Big Mac's thoughts on Notre Dame UM.

Big Max, take of the day. I like Miami by a touchdown, because they look good and that Miami remember. the last time they played how nasty the game was. Oh, 17? You already know, you already know. Big Max, take of the day. I do already know.

It's good. A touchdown, Dan. Did you ask him about the weather, though? Did he know what the forecast was? Does that change any of the analysis? It doesn't matter. You're asking about the forecast. Who cares?

I let him paint his. product. Bill Kamal over here, worried about the weather. All right. All right. So you're... Oh, whoa. You could have gone to anyone else. Anyone else. Anyone else? Oh, yeah. What happened to? Oh, yeah. No, he didn't Don know.

Bob Soap. He didn't know. He didn't know. He didn't know. Oh, my God. He doesn't know. Right nor crossover here. Now people are going to be Googling Bill Kamal. I have to Google it. I'm not going to lie. I'm curious. No, don't. No. It's the one. He was a weather man. You guys are making this something that wasn't meant to be. It was the one name you couldn't choose. The one in the history of South Florida weather, and I think you did it purposely. I think you did know. I think you did happen to know.

Why would I do that on purpose? Because of it. You're you. No, Billy would be risk averse there. Yeah. Oh, wow. I just go. No, no, no, no.

That's a company computer. No, no, no, no. No, no, no. With Amex Platinum, access to exclusive Ammit. Amex pre-sale tickets can score you a spot trackside. So being a fan for life turns into the trip of a lifetime. That's the powerful backing of Amex. Presale tickets for future events subject to availability and varied by race.

Turns and conditions apply. Learn more at amex.ca. slash Y Annex. This episode is brought to you by Defender. With its 626 horsepower twin turbo V8 engine, the Defender Octa is taking on the Dakar rally, the ultimate off-road challenge. at landrover.ca.

Don Lebertard. Lou Holtz, number one. Trooping my balls off. I can't. Play a little touch of gray. You cannot give me enough fake Lou Holt saying any number of... Tripping my balls off. Weird.

You can't give me enough. Stugats. Jewel on the microphone. I'm not sure what you're doing. I'm not sure what you're doing. to avoid eating my own face. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. Before I get to the Suey Awards, Chris,

this category here tends to be our best every year. So how are we feeling about this assortment of best mistakes, worst mistakes that we have? It's where we shine, I'd say, at making mistakes. I'm in here, you're in here, Tony's got to do. Uzi, Amin's got a doozy. All right. Let's see what we have here.

Let's see what doozy is the worst and the best of the worst best dozies. The final day of the 25 Sui Awards is presented by Miller Light. Cast your vote at lebitardaf.com. Winners will be announced this upcoming Tuesday, September 2nd. And now the Suey nominees for Worst Mistake, Chris Cody screws up. the name mori povich marvi poe you want you to do it don't tell me to double dutch must be so confused right now double dutch i'm gonna take i'm gonna take i'm gonna take i'm gonna take my two marvy povitch the minerva got me marvy pov i'm nervous dan lebitard thinks a penguin is a fish

at lebitard show to you what is a penguin more of a fish or a bird i just want to see what comes back i just want to see what comes back got wings no feathers you got no feathers to put in your cap off a penguin What are you talking about? Very slick. All hovered in feathers. Yeah. Is this a thing? What's happening?

Do people confuse penguins with fish? This is not a thing. I don't think it's a thing. I think I'm the only one who does it. They have feathers. I think of them as sleek. I don't, I've never seen a penguin feather away from the penguin.

That's not something that I've seen. Is it a otter a fish? Yeah, pluck it. Do you watch March of the Penguins? I mean, they're in snow. That's also why there's moisture on them. I learned a lot during March of the Penguins.

Did you learn that they were birds? Philadelphia mayor, Shirel Parker botches the Eagles chant. Let me hear you all say, E-L-G-L-E-S-E-S-E-O. Let's go, birds. Rose tries to name hockey players on the hockey show. Okay, Ned Gretzky.

Ned Gretzky? No, not Ned Gresky. Gretzky is a player. Gretzky is a player. I know it's current players, but... David McDavid. No. Mac-McDavid?

No, no, it's Connor McDavid. Conner McDavid. Chris Cody tries to say, people. If being mean on the internet was a sport, I'd want to watch it. And if I was going to watch it, I would use game time to get tickets to go watch people, watch people be mean on the internet. Watch people on the internet? Must be nice to be perfect.

Jonathan Zaslow tries to say neutralized. They knew trauma was Sabana-Jad. I don't remember. That is how it happened. That is the word. That's not dubbed. That is how you said it. That is how you said neutralized.

Let's hear that again. They neutral of a was Sabanajad. Dan Levittard misses up Larsa Pippin's name. And this is funny to think about. Maybe we should get Pablo on here because he's been accused by Marcus Jordan and Larsa Pippin. Excuse me.

Carry on. Play on for me. Greg Cody doesn't know how baseball works. It's a knee-high, fastball, the count is four and one. I guess it is Eric Creed. Four and one. You walked him. Yeah, it's a ball.

The count is four and one. We got there, we got there. He's galvanning the first base. Dan Levitard screws up a Beastie Boys song. Looking like one of the parents from the Beastie Boys party for your right to fight, what is it? Fight for your right to party. Wow. Nailed it, Dana. Yeah.

They'll find them. That is a fine. The Beastie Boys party for your right to fight. What is it? J-Lo, you are a fly girl. The Beastie Boys party for your right to fight, what is it? Greg Cody couldn't be more wrong about Amper Sands in TV show titles. Law and Order SVU, I think, would be the most famous of the colones.

That show's been on for an eternity. Yeah, and I hate that every time I see it. And there's so many iterations of that, that colons are all over the universe now. There's never been a TV show with an ampersand. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, long order. I would you say that? I'm sure there's been plenty. I thought that was the word.

No. No, no, no, Zaf. No, it's going to amperset. There's a lot of ampersand show. Why did you say there's never been a show with it? John Skipper says he knows NBA players while mispronouncing every name on sporting class. If you take the NBA All-Stars and march them in this office one by one, I know who every one of them is. It doesn't matter.

Jokich. Victor Bumbeiana. They're all international players. I don't get one name right. 85% pronunciation on that. Well, I may not have gotten the pronunciation of the spelling right. Wimbiana, I got that right. Wembenyama, very close.

Very close. Chris Cody screws up an ad read. Thanks, Poppy. This stat of the day, brought to you by Evan Williams Bourbon. Game Day's number one poor. Evan Williams' Bourbon, straight Kentucky Burby. Oh, my God. Evan Williams, Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey.

Bartsdown, Kentucky. Reward. No, you were doing so well all week. I've been on such a good role. Irby. His company. Greg Cody interrupts Diana Rusini. Diana, I used to be a George Kittle guy until I saw him go at you, and now I'm very confused.

Thank you, Mike Ryan. Yes, I reported yesterday that George Kittle wants to be the highest paid tight end in football, which I think that's fair. I think I get it. I think we all get that, right? No, I understand. Diana, how good is it now? She's talking. You were being talked to privately there, Greg.

She was, and Mike Ryan wasn't talking on air. All that happened was you cut her up. That's all that happened in the middle of the answer. You're confused by the show that we're doing. Wait, so, Mike, would you let? I would love to hear your answer. I'm sorry, Greg. We all would, actually, except for Greg.

Dan Levitard screws up Lamar Jackson's name. Who's under more pressure this week? And Josh Allen or Lamar Jackin? Jack. I'm sorry, what is right? Running back. Hey, yo, that's crazy. Greg Cody has a dog inside of him.

The pill has not been FDA approved, but it is lengthening the lives of pets. I actually took that pill myself because I got a dog in me. That dog. Well, if you... I got that dog in me. It would have been so good if you nailed it. You have a dog in you? Saw and at.

Very important. You have a dog inside of you. Chris Cody tries to name a famous Lou. I know so many black louis. That's true. We didn't have to like, Lou Armstrong. Top five list. There's so many famous ones.

Who's the most famous Lou? I mean, Louis Armstrong is up there. Lou Bacharach. He's up there. I mean, every black mechanic I've ever went to is named Lou. Farrak? Who's Lou Backerack? I'm telling you.

Lou Beck wrote? Maybe. The car dealership? I know Bert Packerack. Look at me, Lou. Did you just make Burt Baccarac and Lou Baccarat? And, like, everyone was like, yeah, I guess. The creator of the card game.

That guy. You made a guy named Lou Baccarac the most famous of Luz. Stugatz calls Hank Azaria Frank. Yo, Suggott. How are you, Hank? I'm good. I'm good. How you doing good?

We were discussing the Bruce Springsteen cover band that you put together. And I'm wondering whose idea, like, how did that come to fruition here, Frank? Frank? Frank? Frank? That's great. I'm going to call you Frank for the rest of the time. He looks like a Frank. He doesn't make a Frank. Well, Shroom Gotz. Jujugati calls Jonathan Zaslow, Andrew. I'm so happy to see we got a celebrity in the building today. One of the most popular celebrities, Andrew Zaslow. Oh, my God. That's why Andrews is atop that celebrity pick-em board. You dig it? My bad, John.

His close friends call him, Andrew. I call him Jonathan. Dan Levitart can't say subliminally. I don't know what the heat are going to sneak in there. Subliminally? Subliminally? Good job. Digestable.

God damn it. I think heat fans want. Greg Cody doesn't know Hollywood Brown. You got to earn the nickname Hollywood, by the way. Come on. What's he done to earn that? He was born in Hollywood. He's from Hollywood, Florida.

He's from Hollywood. Dispensation. Go 9. Five, four. Greg Cody lived in Hollywood, Florida. Hollywood, Cody. That's where I was born. Phebel Drive.

Hollywood, Cody. Yeah. Dan Lovetard needs to restart the show. Stop that. Stop that. Juju, put it on the poll, please. Does the D&DNC, excuse, DnP, what happened there?

Oh, my God. Juju, verbatim, every single word he said. Oh, my God. Should we start over? Can we start over? Let's start again. Tim Kirchen thought you could milk a male cow. I'd milked one cow in my entire life.

It was a disaster at Ferguson Farm when my daughter was in the fifth grade. And I said, he, meaning the cow, was not interested in giving up a lot of milk. He, to which Buster started to scream at me, a guy who grew up on a dairy farm, I didn't even know that it was only the females that give milk. Did you guys know that? I didn't. Of course we did. Male cows are bulls. You were the cow at a moment.

I didn't know that. The crew messes with Greg Cody about the noise from his computer. That's Greg Cody. No, it isn't. I saw you reach. I know it is. It is. It's got to be.

You hit your computer there. Vet me. If it's me, I will give you $100 bill right now. All right, Mike. This is an AOL email just for the record. Oh, of course. Of course! I knew it!

No. So, I knew it. So I'm talking about... That's impossible. So I'm talking about. It's the cord right here. It's loose. So I'm talking about.

How does that make that noise? Oh, there you go. Wow. Wow. No. No, somebody else is doing that in there. Greg. No, now this is gaslighting.

What? How can they possibly do it in there? I don't know. Let me do it one. So gaslighting. Very unprofessional. I didn't touch it Damn it

And you saw that I didn't say Dan Levitard runs out of words to say I can tell by looking at the teeth That's a tiger show Yeah look at this killing machine I've seen this video too Because my algo is locked in on these man killers So what is this doing?

Why is this doing this The way that it is doing it? Well, because he's being tormented Can you see how the guy is grabbing the thing snout And he's trying to get the thing to bite? Chris Cody can't talk on Mystery Crate Welcome back. Mike Fuentes thinks gase gas gas

why are you guys laughing can a man not speak wow I mean just a little misspeak and it's that funny to you guys welcome to the whole place is this my fourth take doing this maybe yeah Chris Cody screws up asking

Pablo Tori a question Pablo you and three other people your dream my mouth is watering living your death your dream my mouth is watering Dream bag, yet, jet, let. Dan Levitars voice changes. This dude needs to shove this beefy five-layer burrito up his butt.

This is not the qualifier. Yes, it has to happen. It has to happen. That's not what's going to make college football proof certified better than pro football. Well, I know it won't help it if he just decides to not do this. The irony is, is that on Saturday night around 2 a.m., I had one of those burritos coming out of my ass. Is that the irony?

I don't think you know what irony is. Also, why did your voice, did you just keister a five-layer a burrito because you haven't been eating? What happened then? How do you not hear it yourself? How do you not hear it and go, Dan Levitard says Kenny Main's documentary is on Fubu. Okay, so five shooting days. You poured your heart into this documentary.

It is on Fubu, 8 p.m. Eastern tonight, Dan, you said the documentary airs on Fubu. That is a clothing line. Fubo is Oh, I'm sorry, that's my bad. That's a totally different thing. I love that dude on Shark Tank, though. It's a great disseminator of sports content. It's also available through Roku and their other platforms.

After saying Joe Mauer isn't a first ballot Hall of Famer, Greg Cody learns he voted for him. I have confirmed that my dad did vote for Joe Mauer in 2023. On the first ballot? Well, he got in on the first ballot, so it's the only ballot he was on. You should be ashamed of yourself. There's a caveat. No, wait a minute.

Just eat the L. What's the caveat? I want to hear the caveat. Wait a minute. I'll hear it. I'll allow the hearing of it and it's fine. But before he gets to the caveat, can you just admit that you're wrong about your recollection? Yeah, I was wrong.

Can you admit that you're wrong in having a Hall of Fame boat that you treat with so little regard that this is not an indictment of your memory, but it's an indictment in general of how it is that you do these things, that you don't have. actually care whether someone's first ballot or not because you can't remember whether you voted someone first ballot or not. I cherish my Hall of Fame vote enough to have kept it for a long time, unlike yourself, who was stripped of his vote for malfeasance. And in some cases, perhaps non-feasance. For integrity. Not wrong. Not for integrity. Okay, that's what they call it. Tomato potato. David Sampson tries to say croquetta. Would you offer someone a

Corretta from a Jewish deli? Croqueta. Broquetta? No, that's not how you said. That is not how you said croqueta. Andrew Hawkins tries to sound cool with Keenan Thompson. My parents start with A's and all of our kids start with A's. And then some of their kids also all start with A's.

And they think our family is strange for that. No, I just think y'all are dedicated. That's all. Y'all dedicated to the A. I'm dedicated to the A being from Atlanta. So I feel you. Yeah, we both two up, two down, piece up, two down. Is that what it is?

Oh, you're from Ohio. Is that an old man? My bad. I'm still. You're too up, too down. I got a question. Tony Colladdeyood calls Dominique Foxworth a mean. He's avoiding the balls.

Dominic is avoiding the Mots balls, which is the best part. That's the best part of the shoe. How's the soup of me? You're not going to. I mean, do you just call him a mean? Yeah, what? He's an I mean. Exactly.

Thank you. The soup. He's also in our panther chat. The soup itself. That was for sure in a mean. It was not in a mean. It was not in a mean. I mean, it was not.

I mean, how's the soup of me? You want to, man, when you're wrong, How's the soup of me? Why would you throw at my... Dominique, got it. How's the soup of me? This is a safe space for admitting when you made a mistake. How's the soup of me?

That's crazy. I'm trying to have your back, though. Amin El Heson tries to say, not my first rodeo. Of all the players in the NBA who have had to guard Steph Curry this year, I think Thompson has done perhaps the best job. He's just exact in terms of size, in terms of defense and IQ and all that stuff. But first time at the rodeo. And you know what happens at the first time at the first time at the show?

The rodeos to guts. The bull rides the horns or some shit like that. Nailed that's what happened. What was that? He's right. He's never been to a house. How was that a way to dismount on the segment? I've never been to a rodeo.

Great Cody thinks he watched Wilk Chamberlain's 100-point game that wasn't televised. I'm the only one in this room who was alive at the time. Wilk Chamberlain's 100-point game. I was seven years old. You don't remember that. In Hollywood, Florida at 1440, watching on a black-and-white-sylvania. television set. This is a great story here. No, because nobody

believes that game happened. It's a hundred point game and it did happen. I thought it was like famously not televised. I don't think we have seen video proof of him scoring the 100, have we? Yeah, it was he held up a sign after the game. No, but that's not the same, that's all.

This is a Mandela effect going on. Jessica, I think. You think that's a conspiracy theory? No, I think it wasn't televised. I don't think there's a lot of video of that game. I think there's just like one grainy photograph or something. I'm just telling you, I watched it on TV. I don't trust that.

You couldn't have watched it on TV. According to the Library of Congress, the amazing performance wasn't televised and there's no videotape of the game. Only a Philadelphia radio station broadcast. You're full of it. You're just making that up. Fake memory. Maybe it's a figment of my imagination.