The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The B** S***: SO DID WE! (feat. Chuckle F***)

Episode Date: November 25, 2025

“AND A F****** FOUL?” Welcome to the most b****** hour in the history of our show. Mike attacks Bob “Chuckle F***” Wishusen and ****-stirrer Joey Galloway. Zaslow and Tony continue their f****** fight. And someone gets punched in the d***. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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No purchase necessary. Open to legal residents of the 50 U.S. states and D.C. who are 21 years of age or older. Contest ends on December 8, 2025. For details and official rules, visit dentec.com slash ultimate punishment. So, listener, you're thinking about upgrading to the all-new iPhone 17 Pro, designed to be the most powerful iPhone ever. But are you also thinking about the traffic on your way to the store or transferring all your

data? Well, good news. When you order a new phone online with Boost Mobile, they'll send an expert to your home or work to deliver your brand new iPhone 17 Pro and get you all set up on Boost Mobile within minutes. No hassle. Visit boostmobile.com to get started. Delivery available for select devices purchased at boostmobile.com. Terms apply. I've got to be honest right now. I am a little bit lightheaded because I just got to sit next to what I believe to be 20 years of. radio excellence in this market where Zaslow, he, I don't know, his wings, his feathers came out and he hit Tony with, you're high. So did we. You're out to lunch. So did we.

Get a clue. So did we. You played yourself. So did we. Yo, Ben Stiller looking like a fool. So did we. Adam Silver doing nothing. So did we.

That was opera. So did we. Aslo Opera, as Mike's yelling, Snowballs Chance in Hell. So did we! No one's answered my question. Let me try this again. What was the question?

Because it was a long... It was a Dan Lovettar type question. I get it. I get it. It was a Dan Selle question. If Notre Dame and Miami played today, who do you think wins? So did we! Who do you think wins? Where's the game?

Neutral field. Notre Dame's favorite by four and a half. If it's in Miami, we know who's winning that game because Notre Dame hasn't won since 1988. I think Notre Dame with it. The way they've looked, each team's looked the last month, Notre Dame on a neutral field definitely favored. Because Notre Dame won against Syracuse 70 to 7? Yeah.

Because they've won nine in a row. I think even Mike would admit, game by game, they've looked better the last month. I would admit Notre Dame would be favored against Miami. And I would also admit Notre Dame was favored when they played Miami week one. And it didn't matter. They got controlled. Three points.

This really isn't that complicated after that, though. And I will continue to remind you guys that the whole point of this is, Miami being interesting, and so we'll talk about it for a month because it's good to put them side by side and be like, what are you talking about? So did we! No one wanted to answer the question. But the fact of the matter is, on the way that Notre Dame is ranked, it's just basically that since they lost twice, they haven't been tested.

Like, they've looked like they're getting better. Their offense is stronger. They're not playing close games. They're not playing good teams. That's correct, but they're not being. They don't have a Louisville on their schedule. don't have an SMU. Yes, if they were playing Louisville and SMU back-to-back, perhaps they would have lost

two. They are not, but they are not playing close games, and Miami lost two of the games. So did we! And that's how you've sounded for a month, and it's only going to get worse, and people are going to dislike Miami, and Miami's going to enjoy being disliked, and we're going to argue for a month, and the whole point of it is to entertain the content machine. Right, and I hate where we are, where it's just a Miami-Noderdame conversation. Again, I think Notre Dame is a good team.

I think they deserve to be in the playoffs. So do we. So did we! We're one of the best teams in the nation. I think what you're having is a lot of confirmation bias because Miami was underranked to start the season and people pointed to Miami shooting themselves in the foot and saying that's who Miami's team is,

and they haven't checked back yet. If Notre Dame gets to be a different team after their losses, why isn't that afforded to Miami? We've played four games. It's a quarter of the season since Miami played that game against SMU. You've watched Miami every week. Miami does look different from that game. Miami is doing different things since that game.

Miami has navigated injuries since that game. Miami is one of the best teams in the nation. If Miami gets into that tournament, they have a legitimate shot to beat whoever lines up in front of them. And I think the discourse, and I'm partly to blame here, is just solely about Miami and Notre Dame. When the fact is, Miami deserves to be in that tournament on merit. Is anyone else tired of this subject matter?

I just love that it's partly. to blame when the person who centered the entire thing around the one game of which Miami dominated Notre Dame for a three-point win. I'm sure we can find the word dominated in there somewhere. Because what's going to happen is the rankings are going to come out today and Miami is once again going to be on the outside looking in. I'm going to be looking at incredible multiple scenarios inside the ACC trying to figure out how I can get into this tournament with my 23% FPI college football playoff predictor chances, and that is a plight that is on me, and not on Notre Dame as they're sitting comfy at 73% when they lost the effing game.

Maybe score 70 points and win nine games in a row. You don't lose two games out of three weeks. But what are you talking about? Miami, Notre Dame lost two in a row. I heard this on Kirk Herbstree and Joey Galloway's. Well, Joey Galloway, don't take anything that guy says seriously because he's just a shitter. Fastest guy in the league. He's just a shit sir.

How did that happen? That happened on all that? This is always who he is. Is that an Ohio State thing? He's just a shister. It's a character trait. And he said, well, Miami lost two games in three weeks. I'm like, hold up.

Wait a second. That's the argument? Because Notre Dame lost two in two weeks. What are we doing? And then, like, Kirk Herbstree made the point, like, those games were closer. It has to be a punitive measure. Miami beat themselves in this game. So now the loss is being close hurts Miami.

What are we doing? I mean, BYU lost a game by more points in Miami's loss. us their last three games combined. Miami is a really good team. They don't get beat up. No one has Miami's number and kicks their ass. That's not something that's happened to Miami this season. Miami's kicked a lot of ass. Miami's dished out dominations.

I wish the score would reflect the point to the extent that we kick that ass against Florida and FSU and Notre Dame. We don't have the style points. Now we're going for style points and it's a terrible way to watch a game. Miami's one of the best teams in the nation. They deserve to be in the college football playoff. Everyone's subscribing to group think and it's bullshit. Okay, forget about BYU.

All right. Number 11 and number 12 are going to be the ACC champion and the Big 12 and the Big 12 champion or maybe some combination of the group of five champion. The only way for Miami to get in into the college football playoff is if they're in instead of Notre Dame, right? Like both can't get in. Which is a shame because I think both. No, so you're confirming that.

I'm asking essentially. Yeah, I think right now the most. likely scenario. I think the most likely scenario, if you look at FPI, what the committee is telling you, the most likely scenario here is that Miami is going to be left on the outside. Yeah. And Notre Dame is going to be in. Yeah. Kirk Herbstreet asked the question at what point does head-to-head cease to matter. And I've heard Kirk Herbstreet's podcast for several weeks. What do you say? He's often said that if Miami finishes 10 and 2, then head-to-head should matter. And it's

What's happening here is everyone assumed Miami would pack it in after they lost to SMU. And Miami is annoying the hell out of this committee by winning all these games and forcing them to have this conversation. I'm curious to see what they do with Vanderbilt. Does Vanderbilt find its way ahead of Miami so they can avoid this

tier thing that they keep on us about. I'm so done with you, Missouri. So did we! I will never believe in you again, Missouri. Never again. So did we! You guys are leaving me on an island here and there's not enough people saying, you know, Miami is really friggin' good. Miami deserves to be in this college football playoff. You're making the

argument well enough, and I believe most people watching the games would say there are three or four teams in the country that would be favored against Miami. Texas Tech, Texas A&M. There are very few teams, if I put them right now on a field and said it's one game for everything that are going to be favored by a great deal

over Miami. I think they smoke Texas Tech. I think there's a great deal of teams that we smoke. Well, Georgia, probably on reputation. I mean, you didn't smoke Virginia Tech. That's right. You did. I mean, did you watch the game?

That was a 10-point game late in the fourth. It was a bullshit game. Didn't cover. I'm just saying you're saying smoke them. We smoked our win probability never went below 92%. Yeah, we kicked their ass. We went into Blacksburg and we kicked their ass. Now we like those EFN.

This is where we are with this, though. It's Snowball's Chance in Hell over here, and we kick that ass. And he's getting emotional because he wants to be one of the 12. team. I'm getting frustrated because no one's answering my question. No one else. What was the question? What was the question?

Does Miami deserve to be in the college football playoff? That wasn't the question. The question was who would win between them in Notre Dame? And no one answered that. So let me try this a different way. Does Miami deserve to be in the college football playoff? Yes. Dan, would you like to take a stab?

Sure. They should have won all their games. Teams that win all their games should probably make it. They didn't. There's four teams that have won all their games. Now there's a cluster of 10 and two teams. And Miami is the best win out of them. This is the discussion.

Look, man. And the worst losses, though. No. FSU beat Alabama. That doesn't stick to them. It's true. Miami's got a rank. SMU better be ranked today. Miami's got a rank loss. Yeah, but we can't do the whole like, you know, same opponent and who beat that same opponent better for Miami and Alabama, right? No, we've decided that we're not going to do that and the Alabama FSU result doesn't matter. Can I get you, is there a way to quiet this storm somehow, publicly, privately, every kind of way?

by just conceding to you that everyone listening to this would probably tell you, yeah, I think Miami is one of the 12 best teams in the country. And then everything after that is just arguing about the 10 slots, the eight slots for the other two lost teams as we know, oh, Texas isn't that good. Oh, Oklahoma's not that good. Oh, Georgia Tech's not that good. That among these two lost teams, yeah, Miami's probably one of the,

probably the best of the six two lost a team. If I remove the brands from this, no one's okay with the scenario in which two teams are in the college football playoff precipice, Notre Dame in Miami out, but two 10 and two teams. And the tiebreaker usually is head to head, and they're not taking that into a count.

Jeremy, how is that a losing argument? It's not a losing argument. I just think we've seen it before. It doesn't surprise me with the college football playoff when we see that they're including head to head as a factor. It's not the only factor. And maybe it should be. when you get to the end of the season

and these teams are sitting at the same record. But they've had different schedules. They play different teams. This isn't the NFL where you're playing all of the same teams against each other. No, there are a ton of similar opponents. And if these were two simply just ACC teams, maybe we're having a different conversation. But we're not.

Like, this has been the case with the college football player for years. And Mike, it's why I support you and why Dan, you should follow your own precedent that you see. set from 2017, which is if a team that deserves to be in the college football playoff is excluded by ESPN and the conglomerate of people keeping them out purely for biased perspectives, you should crown Miami national champions. Folks, want to have some skin in the game? Put your money and award-winning bourbon where your mouth is. Whether you enjoy sipping it straight or mixing it in a cocktail,

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Hey everyone, it's Jeremy here, and I want to talk to you about Black Friday Game Day, because Black Friday Game Day is coming to crime with an epic day of live sports. Black Friday football is back, with the Chicago Bears taking on the Philadelphia Eagles at 3 p.m. Eastern, that's followed by an Emirates NBA Cup double header. Bups Knicks at 7 p.m. and Mavs Lakers at 10 p.m. And the whole day starts with the Capital One Skins game as four elite people. PGA golfers meet with $4 million on the line. Black Friday Game Day,

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Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin, 96 calories, and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Don Lebertard. If Daniel Day Lewis did it, you'd be jerking off all over yourself. Oh, come on. Yeah, I would be. Aggressive description? I mean, what is that?

I'm just saying. You know what? That's me. You're just saying what? That's me. Daniel Day Lewis does something. I see that photo of Daniel Day Lewis looking like Lincoln before he's about to start filming Lincoln.

And you know what I do? I jerk off all over myself. That's what I do. Lincoln, who you outed the other day? Don't make this a rejoin. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. The committee has an incredible chance ahead of them. Tonight, to come out, put Miami in, leave Notre Dame out.

Tonight, though. Just to get the juices flowing. Just to get the juices flowing. Just to get people riled up before Thanksgiving. My juices are flowing. I alluded to, like, why does Notre Dame get to sit comfy on Thanksgiving at 73? percent while I'm living and dying at 23, you would have thought that that head-to-head matchup would have at least afforded me that.

But they're in the catbird seat, and I don't get it. The committee puts their hat on that hat rack, all the white hats that they got literally three seconds before that video, they say, look, we'll put Miami in. Let's just have some fun. I can't even stand up right now. They're mailing it in too, Dan. Chris is mailing it in. I'm not, obviously.

But everybody else in America is mailing it in. The college football committee says, hey, you know what? Put Miami in. Let's have some fun this weekend. This is the problem I'm having around here, okay, is that Jeremy, as all you guys, are talking is saying to me, do you know that Norman Powell is second only to SGA in points per isolation? That's right. That's some good company. SGA, Norman Powell. It's not what we were talking about. It doesn't matter. And what Mike is doing is he's making a good

but tedious argument. So did we! And I don't think you're wrong. And I think the point is to have you arguing and you're just raising the stakes on what that Pittsburgh game will be because you're dying for the feeling of the last two years where you're snorting the edge of the earth because you're very close to the championship. If you get to the playoffs, your team is ascending. Mario Cristobal is clearly climbing. If he's getting better every year and you can get blown out in your sport like James Franklin just did, like if that's the stakes on we're going to pay these guys $90 million with $50 million buyouts,

Mario Cristobal's trajectory the last couple of years has been up. His last team was flawed, but wonderful offensively, wonderful to watch. But you didn't believe in it the way you believe in this one, being physical, being fast, side-to-side on defense, having a lot of ways to beat you. You believe in a playoff. This is your best chance to win a championship. Like, this is the best chance you've had in how many years? Yeah.

No, this is the best team that we've had since turn of the century. You remember when we asked about Yichiro's contract and David Samson was just like, it can't be. It simply can't be. And if Miami handles business at Pittsburgh and they finish this season. Do they have to beat him better than Notre Dame did? I don't understand that point when the head coach said,

and has since apologized for, like, Notre Dame doesn't matter. When asked about the Notre Dame game, he said the Miami game. It was just weird. This is a conference game. Pittsburgh is playing for a chance to get into the conference championship game.

There's a totally different scenario. out. And I'm glad Lou Riddick and chuckle for you have an opportunity to correct the wrongs. You know the committee doesn't care. You know what? No, no, no. But what I'm saying is, what I'm saying about it can't be is Miami is 10 and 2, Notre Dame is 10 and 2. They both played. Miami beat Notre Dame. Miami gets shut out of the college football playoff. Notre Dame's best win is against a middling USC team. I could under, I could even understand potentially slightly if Notre Dame stacked these crazy wins. They went to Athens and beat Georgia. I'm like, all right, that's impressive. But they don't.

They don't. They don't have great wins. So why are you shutting Miami out? What happened on the field has to matter. I think if we told anybody at the beginning of the season that this scenario was possible, they'd all be like that's bullshit. That's not football. That's not right. One team won, one team lost. A team that one should be rewarded, not penalized. We can all agree if there was an NIT, they'd be a one seed. Oh, yeah. All right, look, this is the part that's pissing me off, okay? Because the way that he's getting here is a bit disrespectful on a couple of fronts. And I'm surprised you're not offended on Bob Wushuson's behalf. When Mike sideswipes local legend Bob Wichuzon. Chuckle fuck. Chuckle fuck.

Yeah. Okay, so your colleague, your colleague, that's my co-worker. You're Joey Galloway with calling him, whatever he is, whatever you were calling him, a shitster. You're choosing sides? You choosing ESPN over us? Is that what you're doing? No, I'm choosing respect. If you know anything about me, you know I'm a man of respect.

What about this man right here? I respect him, too. You don't respect him, obviously. He didn't say anything bad about me. Look, Bob was choosing, I consider him a friend. So much so that he is saved in my phone as chuckle. f*** you are yeah what is it chuckle

alleged this is a term him going after bob like their friends a term of endearment you're calling Bob with Shusen publicly hold on a second is that what he saved us Tony that's what he saved that Bob his shoes and chuckle I didn't know you had this

relationship with local legend and I don't know if I could Former Bootschambi roommate look Bob Wichusin I would say is one of the great prodigies to come through this town you're reducing him to chuckle because he's stuck with Miami

Virginia Tech, while everyone else has the good games, chuckle-f-hick, is disrespectful. Yeah, I understand. Why are you doing that? He's disrespecting me. By perpetuating this narrative, I don't know who from the CFP committee

got in their ear and said, hey, if Miami doesn't win this game by 40 points and you don't set that tone early, it's a disaster for them. And they just went along with this narrative, and it was a horrible way to watch a game. And since then, Lou Riddick has been overcompensating saying, head-to-head matters.

To me, Miami should be in. I'm like, that would have been nice to hear. Guess what, Lou Riddick. and chuckle f***, you get an opportunity this weekend to fix this. Sounds like he's saying Bob and Lou Riddick did not hang their hat when they walked into that broadcast booth. No, they were pawns. And I alerted Bob with shoes and to, hey, Bob, you're being used here. So, shape up.

How many people are you going to call out? Lou Riddick has now been called out and Schittster. Joey Galloway, does he have a reputation as a shit star? Jordan McPherson, AP voter. What do you say? That ranked Miami behind Notre Dame as a Miami Herald writer. Wow. That hell you doing.

How dare you call Jordan McPherson? That's a kind man. Look, there's a huge problem here with the AP and the coaches poll because I know what they do. They look at last week's rankings and they look at the box scores and then like a little thing here, a little thing there. That's what they do? Every voter is being asked an existential question about football and they should take that responsibility seriously. The fact that only four AP voters have Miami over Notre Dame when they have the same record played on a football field and Miami won is criminal. There is a huge, there is a war on football and you as an AP voter and a coach, there isn't a coach on God's Green Earth that would be okay with this. They're all subscribing to this group. Think there is a war on football.

Stand your ground and vote with your heart. Vote for what's right. Vote for what happens on the field. Go on. Because games matter. Don't talk to me about who would be favored. They play the games for a reason. Go after Jordan McPherson. Mike, you are continuing. I guarantee you he's fixing that next. week. I guarantee you he is if Miami wins and doesn't fall on their face in November like this is who we're kind man. This is who we're going after. This is who we're going after. This guy's awesome. He's better. Jordan. Jordan. If you do this shit again, if Miami goes into Pittsburgh and noon with Lou Riddick and chuckle f*** on the broadband. And they take care of business.

You need to do the right thing. And let me tell you the right thing is overcompensating and putting Miami in number fucking four. Mike, I need you to stop cursing. I think my tone was good there. So did we. This is the problem with what's happening right here, okay? You are unhinged. You're out to see. I can't do

this for a month. No one's watched Miami since they lost. Mike. I checked in the fourth quarter to see the score. You told us not to, by the way. Mike, I'm just telling you that while you're shouting at everyone in America about this because you care about this program and you care about this championship,

chance. I've got Jeremy he's moved off of Norm Powell's stats in isolation and he's asking me for the descriptor on the show is chuckle f*** one word or two. It's two. First name, chuckle last name. Okay. It's disrespectful.

It's disrespectful. It's disrespectful. Like Zaslow, I have rarely heard in our market someone of Babu Shuzin's pedigree being taken down by a similar colleague peer of of good repute in the industry

to dismiss the other one as chuckle-b is as disrespectful a thing. Mike, don't play the innocent ears if you don't know who you're coming after. Don't talk to me like I didn't I didn't take this complaint directly to Bob Wushuson. He would say it to Chuckles I did. I did. You were in the group chat.

You were in the group chat. You were in the group chat. I know. It's hard to keep up. I added him. I add chuckle-f-f- Do we need to get Wushin on? He's a local he's a local legend, Mike, and you're being disrespectful. being disrespectful. It's disrespectful.

How? He was disrespectful to my program. Mike, no one would say chuckle-f-h is respectful. No one would say that. No one. That makes it disrespectful. He's a pawn in the CFP committee's game. He went with this ridiculous

narrative. Him and Lou Riddick. Yes, both of them. Co-conspirators. With Joey Galloway, that shit, sir. He's a shitser. He's a different. Put him off to the side. No one can take Joey Galloway seriously.

Don't, don't. Listen, I've been in this game for 20 years. Put it on the poll. that guy says seriously. Put it on the pole? I've heard that. Put it on the pool. Yeah, I've heard that. That's your calling.

He doesn't have any conviction. He just moves on from argument to argument. I'm just saying what I've heard. He moves on from argument to argument to argument. I've heard that. Did you watch the next game that he did? I've heard that. I've heard that.

I've heard that. I've heard that. We're efforting for Bob. You're saying that Lou Rick, well, we should talk to Lou Riddick. If you're saying they're co-conspirators, chuckle fucking Lou. I don't know Lou like that. I do know Chuckle f*** like that. that. So did we? You guys are trying to work me up. When I came in here, I'm like, I'm

You're not worked up yet? We're trying to work you. We're trying to work you. We're getting there. There is a criminal enterprise that is operating right under your noses, and you're all just like, all right, this is cool. Been here for eight years, man. Everything that we've learned about football, about results mattering, head-to-head mattering. I guess let's throw that out the window because they lit up Fran Brown. Now I know why Frame Brown obsesses over quitting so much. Stinky frame-brown. Because his team quits on his ass. Okay, 70 to 7, that was bad. They played their third-string quarterback at home against North Carolina. Look, some of these teams are breaking. Louisville is not the same team now when they get injured. They lost two Browns. So at the end of the season, Miami's thing is formidable. We all know this.

I just need you to settle down on this front. You're cursing too much? There are too many curses in this segment. And now I think Chris Cody is hearing curses in places that they don't exist. This was an argument before the show that we had. about Creighton. You're going to have to describe this play to the audience here, but I think Chris Cody made an editing mistake because I think he bleeped something that was not meant to be bleeped here as an official tries to,

or an announcer goes crazy because of what, a blocking call? Yes, Creighton is on defense, and this guy comes up for a crazy dunk, and they call a foul, where if you watch the play, there's hardly any contact, but this broadcaster, his name is John Bishop. It was Creighton versus Baylor. John Bishop loses his mind when there's a call. We'll relive this bleep afterboard. I want to play the whole thing because it's great sound.

Car into the paint. Miss the dunk. And I fowl. What are you talking about? That was two seconds after the play ended. Car driving. He's outside the circle. He's outside the circle and he's set.

He was outside the circle and he was set. Brett Smith blew it. He was outside the restricted area. He was straight up and down. He was. set like the statue sitting out in front of New York, New York, and they called that. That's an absolutely horse crap call in a game that's been played out like this. Unbelievable.

Bailout call by an incompetent referee. And ball don't lie. And then he missed the free throw. Do you guys remember Don't West from QVC when he would open up a sporting pack and be like, Look, Juan Gonzalez. That sounds just like the late Don West. So when I heard this first call, I heard it unbleeped, I'm convinced, I'm going to play now. Like, you're telling me, you think that that announcer right there, it's a television, it's a radio?

It's a radio, but I'm going to replay it with the bleep. You're telling me, into the pain. Miss the dunk. And I'm a f-and-fowl. Why are you talking about? I wish he had. An f-and-fowl? All right, let me play now.

A professional play-by-playman into a microphone, you think, shout it out, and, effing foul. Now luckily we have a team around here because before the show I bleeped it and then I found out from our team they're like hey he doesn't say the F word he says blocking foul blocking blanking those are similar let's replay now without the bleep you decided to bleep I listened to it multiple times and I thought I heard the F word it's so much better with the bleep that it is without it a blocking foul is one form of outrage you listen for yourself tell me what you hear but not only listened for yourself know that the volume he comes at this, expects

the second syllable to be Fri. Are into the pain. Miss the dunk. And I'm fucking foul. What are you talking about? Gine it's very clearly blocking. I don't know how you missed that.

And I'm fucking foul. What are you talking about that? You guys have the ability to know before what the controversy was. If you're just listening to this the first time, I'm telling you, I thought it was. No, I think we have the ability to know that it's a crazy thing

for a play-by-play guy. That's why I thought it was great sound. A effing foul. Play it one more time. But throw up the image of Dandy Don West in the background, even though that's not Dandy Don West. Look at Dandy Dom West. And I'm fucking foul.

Look, do you realize, guys, how much greater the games would be if you could just let it fly like that in your second syllable. Hey, leaping foul. It's so much better that way. My mistake, hand up. But that's me working hard.

You say I'm, you know, Thanksgiving week, mailing it in. He's doing extra work then. That is me going above and beyond. Do you have any other Thanksgiving things to sprinkle over the laziness of nobody's working this week? I have rapper Ply's talking about his ideal Thanksgiving menu. It's my favorite time of the motherfucking meal. I'm going to make my mother fucking meal for Thanksgiving. We're going to start off with the motherfuck meat.

I want me a deep fried. Motherfucking. I'm talking about a peanut o'clock. I'm talking about you got a season that motherfucker two, three days in advance. Shooting with that motherfuckie. Cajin butter, all in the neck, all in the breast. Scoot, all in the motherfuck, all in the mother fucking whine. Scoot.

Hit him all over with that Cajun butter. Then I want a motherfucker hunting bake ham. I'm talking about glaze and shine that motherfucker with all that motherfucker's sugar. All that mother's, ooh. And I want me a motherfucker tuck in the oven, slow bake tucking on $2.50. I'm talking about I baked that motherfucker all night, fall asleep, cooking that motherfucker. Then you wake up in the morning. That motherfucker's so tender.

I got to have that food. That's the type of care. You know when they say the secret ingredient is love? That's it. That is going to be, you know the meal from hook, the food fight? That's what it's going to be. I think he may have said blocking. God damn it.

This might be the most bleeped hour in the history of our show. Do you have anything else from the Thanksgiving bucket so I can just be done with this and we can try over the course of the next two days to give people the show they deserve. instead of the lazy Thanksgiving one you want to do. I have Dan wishing everyone a happy Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. This microphone smells like crap. It's a Frito mic.

I remember that one. You can hear the smell of the microphone. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. This microphone smells like crap. Were you like 10 feet away? Why was that so far? Did you like cover your phone? It was the Frito microphone?

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. When you say it was the Frito microphone, I legitimately don't know whether you mean Josh Friedman. Definitely him. Excuse me, everybody. Not Frito Lays. Nope.

Game time is the official ticketing partner of the Dan Levitard show and I cannot wait to get out to some NFL games this season as a games increase in importance the tickets are harder to come by and nothing beats being in that stadium with everybody losing their minds.

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Edge of your seat plays jaw-dropping moments and that rush like you're right there in the action. Sports are meant to be watched live and you can do that with Fox One. Fox One, we live for live for live streaming now. Dan Lebatard. My algorithm on Instagram is dance all boobs. Stugats. It's a good algorithm. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats.

I texted Bob with shoes in. Can you join us right now? Mike is giving you crap for your Cain's coverage on Saturday. His response, I can't, unfortunately, just tell him he's wrong whatever he's saying. I don't think he respects you enough either. I believe chuckle-f-fuck over there, South Florida,

broadcasting legend is doing a little chortling in his suit with his guy Lou Riddick, co-conspirator, to laugh at Miami when you're from here, Bob. You came here and you earned your college football adjacent credentials in this town. So did we! Don't chuckle. Don't chuckle. I'm going to pin him up.

Maybe you have a little happy hour in Pittsburgh on Friday. So did we! Maybe take a different approach. Come here, chuckle. Come here. Let me put an arm around you. Who you're going, Mike? Yeah, I'm going to the game.

Okay. So, and Zazlo. High probability to be sad. Zazlin, borrow your sweater. Zazla, where are you going? Are you going to a cold place this weekend? Yeah, I'm going to Northern. Norman, Oklahoma.

Are you going to get more clothes? Because that's going to be bitter cold. No, Zazlo, you're not going to do it again. No, I told you already, I control my own blood. I'll be fine. That doesn't even make sense. Well, it sounds stupid. You wouldn't understand.

You wouldn't understand. Oklahoma might, Norman might be colder this time of year. This bone-chilling cold. You're going to do a show outside? Yeah, of course. I think it's got to be 25 degrees noon start for Miami Pittsburgh. You understand the deeper winter gets the colder it gets, yes? Yeah, no, but whatever, man.

I'm tough. You're right. All right. Tony. Potential for rain, by the way, on Saturday, Dano in Norman, Oklahoma. You ready for that? Cold rain. You know about cold rain? Speaking of Norman. Second in points per isolation behind Shay Gildes Alexander. 56 degrees, Zaz. You're going to be all right. Yeah.

Zaslo is, I did not think that with everyone eating at the football trough, that Zaslo would have an opinion, controversial and unique among people talking about sports in this market. where Zazzoa is now a person that any time in a football game, an outbreak of punching happens because these tacklers are getting better and better at hunting the football with punches. Someone should send me video of last night because no one's done that yet. Any, well, Zaslo, don't act burdened by it. This is a great honor the audience bestows upon you by having a take no one else has,

which you want to ban, you want to ban punching in football. So the 50 times a weekend that someone punches out the football, you get the tweet, Eat it, Zaz. That's a good play. But the one time a guy gets hit in the junk and a fight breaks out after the game. Oh, by the way, Carolina Panthers in the mix. When a fight breaks out during a game last night, at the end of the game, Zaslo is being tweeted by the Internet, the entirety of the Internet, because he is more associated with this take than anyone.

Mark Schleris of the world are saying punching's fine, and Zazel's like, come on, let's draw the line at punching. Let's not punch anymore. I mean, I have an incredible amount of, you know about that dick, punch tweets at me last month. Well, look how far the balls away from the ball. Oh, he's going over the ball. He's going over the ball.

No, but look at this. This is why the fight happened after this game, and that's a cast. Like, that's a cast. Maybe he was trying to get all the way to the ball with the punch. Yeah. That's right. So it's okay. It's legal.

It's going over the ball. Oh, I missed. I hit him in the dick. Whoops. For the record, I don't like this. This is bad. We don't need the slow zoom, guys. No, yes, we do.

No. This shouldn't be allowed. The video's even better. This is the still. The video is incredible. This just looks inappropriate. Video, thank you for this good work. Dan, it's an uppercl.

Listen, stop right now. Everyone, stop what you're doing. This has to be there. Need to be criminal charges. Hey, yo. I meant the arm. Hey, yo. That looks like from this still shot that that could be a horse.

Everyone, listen, you settle down. I know you've been dreaming for the Telestrator day when you get to do, oh, can I draw a horse? I wish I could circle right now where I'm talking about. Yes, okay, fine. Let's get me that. I want to be able to draw on our screen. Nobody needs your knowledge of the horse penis. right now. GQ, get on that.

If you don't back off right now with your Thanksgiving confidence so that I can get to what I'm going to say here, there should be criminal charges for this. Chris Paul's about to retire after a great, great, great career. One of the things I'm most associate is he did this to people. He did this to people. He's a honker. No, a honker. He's a honker. It's criminal. He's a hunker. Look, it's criminal. I want to put this footage back up. do the close-up, please again, because I want this to be an investigation from our show. Dan, the ball is three players

away. He's wearing a cast. Look, these clubbed people, three quarters of a way into a season that's not meant for the human body. This is a club he's wielding, and no wonder Joanne Jennings after the game wants to fight him, because this is a criminal act. And I'm going to say the 49ers

with some of that money they stole from Iyuk should press criminal charges. In the video, you can't hear because it's a still. He's like way away from It's an uppercat. This is a crime. I don't agree with it. During Monday night football.

Salt. Carolina in the mix. They broke their streak of winning the coin toss and winning the game. 49 is 8 and 4. Look out. Told you. It's ridiculous. No, because, come on.

I think I'm finally off the hook. New sound to isolate. Can we get that sound guys? Get the sound. And what the sound you will hear. You got punched in the ball. That's what Joe on Jennings had. yeah this is this is you will be able to isolate the delight of this sound will now speak the thing

that made me that make that sound was the sheer delight in honestly marveling at how how get that sound too how tough get them both and make them both music because both of those sounds are that's about as good during the sport like this is a wide open NFL okay Kansas City and the Patriots there's been a lot of dominance of dolphins were in the hunt this But San Francisco 49ers, over the last five years, really close, really tough, really superstar. And the thing that made me make that sound is that they ground yesterday the Carolina Panthers to dust, even though the visual I have from last night's game is there's Fred Warner in one box. Oh, his body broke.

There's Joey Bosen another. Oh, his body broke. How is this team always doing it, even though they've got like half the functioning. bones you need and now the usage rate of the running back is back up so that they can withstand three Brock Purdy turnovers because that team's eight and four and they're they're built to be feared the same way that the Rams are except their quarterback you don't trust him the way you trust the Rams quarterback but to see them survive the Mac Jones stuff and this level of injury like that organizational stability is crazy they had injury at quarterback like how is that

how is that team eight and four I mean they've been helped with the schedule, but the thing is Brock Purdy, you don't usually see that. That was kind of an outlier game from Brock Purdy. He's usually been really good taking care of the ball. He was so bad. Three interceptions the first half. I was like, I stepped away for a second. He threw two picks. I was like, what happened? Oh, but they were up against Carolina, even though they should have four turnovers in the first half. Like, that team is physically something, that organization physically is something. George Kittles, the one still doing on three quarters of his remaining functioning bones. Like, what the San Francisco 49ers are organization?

I'd really like to get someone on that we can talk to about what just happened with IUC because I thought guarantees were guarantees like I'm I the I thought something says it's a guarantee like there are ways to get avoided criminally, but like your behavior can't be mismeeting. No, but isn't it similar to Christian Wilkins? Okay, but you just signed a hundred and twenty million dollar deal in the office. If at any point in my life, anyone listening to this, if I say to you that you have a contractual guarantee, that's a contractual guarantee, that's a. That's a guarantee. Those don't get voided for stuff we don't know about. It's not missing meetings. But anyways, I speak ill-informed.

I just assume the worst. I assume the 49ers have a lot of trouble keeping all those stars getting money. Iyuk wanted his money, got his money, and now they're trying to void the guarantees because God knows how that affects Trent Williams' next contract. The point I'm trying to make is I can't believe how tough that team is as an organization because the sound I made was that's Fred Warner and Joey Bosa in the booth. Like, Carolina was doing things offensively that suggested perhaps they could catch the broken bucks. Perhaps, like Saints aren't any good.

Well, and, and by the way, like Tony, you mentioned about the schedule at San Francisco, they probably play in the best division in football. They're four in one in a division. Yeah, easy. Like, they're winning in the division. Look, man, I don't, I know we get carried away analyzing things. This is not humanly sane, okay? Buffalo falls apart with injuries. in a way that you don't trust them exactly.

San Francisco goes through backup quarterbacks and their quarterback throws three interceptions and they're eight and four and everyone knows they're going to be well coached and you might question Kyle Shanahan because he blows a lead but he might have a lead to blow because he's blown more of them than anybody, at least in part because for the last five years

no team's been in a better position anywhere in football without having done something than them. And their next two games are so easy. They're at Cleveland and then they're, host Tennessee. I mean, they survived. Like, Mac Jones looked competent. Like, you guys were giving Kevin O'Connell a credit that Kyle Shanahan's the only one to actually

merit, right? Kyle Shanahan's the only one that actually merits. Yeah, he'll do it with any quarterback. He'll do it with Garoppel. I think Sean McVeigh's in that conversation, too. But what other quarter, I mean, Goff and Stafford, and that's it, right? Yeah, but I mean, he'd Teaker. Baker resurrected

his career over there. Baker, right? Okay, man, chill. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody. This microphone like crap. It's the holidays and the 50th anniversary of Miller Light. Holidays are all about gathering around with family and friends, so why don't you bring out a cornucopia of that beautiful white can Miller Light or draft? Whatever it is.

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