The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Bill Lawrence Breaks Hollywood News

Episode Date: September 6, 2024

Did you know John Harbaugh is 61? Well, Chris Cote sure did, and that's why it's time to quiz the room on the Top 10 Oldest Coaches in the NFL. Then, Dan's dog assaulted Amin, Lana Del Rey might have a new boyfriend who works with alligators, emo Mike returns, and Amin is ready for the new show "Chimp Crazy." Then, Bill Lawrence is here and immediately accepts an invite to play basketball with Tony. He also chats with the crew about his new show "Bad Monkey" with Vince Vaughn, being competitive about making TV, his worst experience with TV executives, and Tua's IT-Factor. Plus, he breaks some big Hollywood news right here on the Dan Le Batard Show. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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or visit a store near you. Cuervo, now's a good time. Trademarks owned by Becle, S-A-B, the C-V. Copyright 2024, Proximo. Jersey City, New Jersey, please drink responsibly. Welcome to the Big Sewy presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBattard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries That if they're just there that hasn't happened to you guys. I've done it and now here's the marching band to nowhere fat-face and the habitual liar So wait Mike, did you ever actually get to your point on Lincoln Park? I did want to go to more Lincoln Park talk, but in the end it doesn't even matter Ah I saw a crazy- Wait Roy, do you understand that joke?

Yeah, I actually do. Oh, Roy. I actually do know that song. Ah! I got him! I got the mom, I got, no, no. You're a karaoke guy, you know that song. In the end.

Come on, man, that song's great. It is. Stop doing the bad voice to go there. Those bands were good, and Linkin Park was as good as any of them. The one complaint that I would have about The way that they've come back together here is I would have loved because Chester is so hard to replace as you mentioned I wish that if they were making a new album

they would have just used a different singer on every song that they did and then towards some of the old songs or even used those vocals on hooks like just through playing them live rather than having the artists with them because just replacing a singer as iconic as Chester with a voice that was so specific is so difficult to do. Yeah there was like I think a few years ago Chris Novacellczyk and Dave Grohl played a concert that wasn't as Nirvana but they honored Nirvana and they kind of did that. They had different singers come in.

I think the person that worked the best was actually Joan Jett. And she kind of replicated Kurt Cobain's voice quite well. Kurt Cobain's? Drink in my cup? Oh, to America. I got that drink in my cup. Thank you.

Yeah, to America's I guess. Rest in peace for Chomi Kwan by the way. I think it's difficult to tour that way. There's been, this has been kind of long rumored on the internet that Linkin Park, because of where they were in their careers, they actually have, they're gonna make more money than they've ever seen before now that they're back.

I think it's a little bit more difficult to tour. There was a notion that the dude from Sum 41 was gonna join because he and Mike Shinoda The guy with the face? Played, the guy that was married to Avril Lavigne The face and his voice kind of sounds like Chester's a little bit I really hope I'm not botching the name of this band because it came up on a playlist But I think the the front person for falling in reverse might have also been a good fit for what Lincoln Park did

But I saw the videos and they're playing shows in like the next couple of weeks. They're playing Kia they're playing Brooklyn, they're playing London. It's going to be electric. People are going to enjoy those shows. It's just, I'm just being nit picky about what I would have liked on an album rather than just replacing a singer. But that's like, you know, maybe asking for too much. You guys are talking in Cantonese right now. Completely lost. You're saying a bunch of names.

There's a bunch of names. There's a segment of the internet and this show that's really going to, our audience is going to like this. Are they? Yes. Lincoln Park was. You sure about that? I mean, not me and Mike.

We'll move on away from Lincoln Park. Chris Novoselsov? Sounds like a hockey player. Hockey player, right? Yeah. Move away from Lincoln Park. What are you, a family in Chicago with two kids going out to the suburbs?

That's easy. Yeah, there you go. Theography. After the Trans-Siberian. Yeah, there you go. Geography. After the Trans-Siberian Orchestra joke, there's just no following that. I saw a stat last night in this football game that blew my mind. Yes?

Was it the Harbaugh stat? Yes. That he's the second oldest coach in the league? John Harbaugh. Let's put a picture up of him right now. John Harbaugh is the second oldest coach in the NFL. Belichick is one, I'm assuming. I want to play a him right now John Harbaugh is the second oldest coach looks great in the NFL Bellacheck is one I'm assuming you I want to play a game right now stop saying names everyone right now stop saying names I want to play a game

and it's called can you name the ten oldest coaches in the NFL we're gonna play this like pitch clock style everyone gets two strikes just first time we're not gonna do three everyone gets two strikes we're gonna play this like pitch clock style. Everyone gets two strikes. All right, we're gonna, just first time, we're not gonna do three. Everyone gets two strikes. We're gonna start in that room with Mike. Okay. And I want Mike to take the first guess.

Scott? This is Scott. First off, when I saw that stat, I was shocked to learn that not only was he the second oldest coach in the league, but he was the oldest horror ball. You could've like totally. Jim has so much little brother energy, are you kidding me?

Is this, is this Happy Birthday? Yeah, old age by real big fish. Just say a name, cause this is not fair. Cause you get to guess everyone and there's a very obvious choice. All right. That you're gonna get. If it's a top 10 oldest coach in NFL,

you do not get a strike. Okay. First one with two strikes, if you get two strikes you're eliminated. Last one standing wins. Mike, what's your guess? All right, well, I wasn't prepared for this game, so let me think for a brief moment.

You can't think, you gotta go. All right, can I put, I just gotta get one of the top 10? Yes. The one with the top 10 oldest coaches in the NFL. But we're excluding the ones that we know that are chapter. No, no, no, John Harbaugh, you can't guess, so there's only nine right answers here. Nine answers, come on.

All right, is Jim Harbaugh in the top 10? Jim Harbaugh is number five. Wow. He is 60. One year younger. 60. Wow, they look good for 1661. John looks great for 1661. I'm going to go, OK.

That's a long. All right. I'm going to go with music, please. Yeah. Hit me again. You need some music. I need, yeah. It's only 30 seconds, so this is doing a lot here.

Pete Caril. Carol. Carol. Doesn't coach in the NFL anymore. That's a wrong answer. That's a strike. I Kirill Carol coach in the NFL anymore By one of the youngest now replaced by there was a I mean there was a very obvious where the hell did he go? He's just not coaching. All right. Let's go to Roy Roy. What's your guess Mike Tomlin? Mike Tomlin is number 10 on this list 52 years old

If you're doing your math right you're looking for 52 or older. Okay let's go to Jeremy. By the way, no problem. You guys all got computers. Yeah, laptops down. Watch this people behind you. Andy Reid. Andy Reid is the oldest coach in the league at 66. Jess, and we're gonna hit this music again. And Jess, what do you got? Um, Mike McCarthy. Mike McCarthy is the third oldest coach in the league. Good answer, good answer. All right, we are to Tony. Shit and bricks. Bowling woman with a strike is a meme.

Ah, shit. I'm going to go Todd Bowles. Todd Bowles is the fourth oldest coach in the league. All right, we're back to Mike. Sean Payton. Sean Payton is the sixth oldest coach in the league. You guys are going so fast. only have three more seven eight and nine rivers I mean you are up I'm up huh so the music is playing everyone's kind of

guess their names and everyone's wondering I mean what name are you gonna say and I'm wondering myself what name I'm gonna say because I've run out of... Oh, Ron Rivera. Ron Rivera is not on this list and I don't think he's coaching anymore. Yep, he was fired for sure. But then when did everyone get a fire? By the way, before we said that, you said Belichick first. But like before we played the game.

Yeah, you got three guys. I got three? Belichick, Pete Carroll, and Ron Rivera. You're playing last year's version. You gotta play this year's version. You crushed this game last year. All right, over to Roy. I got no Punting so that's two strikes for a month on first one strife one strike for Roy. All right, Jeremy

Trying to think of any NFL coaches that exist Sean McDermott Trying to think of any NFL coaches that exist. Sean McDermott. One of the youngest coaches in the NFL is not on this list. And that's one strike for Jeremy. Good thing I did two strikes here because this game is lingering. Tony, go ahead. Yes, it is. Whoa.

I'm going to go Jess. Sorry. I'm doing a lot. I'm going to guess because he's got white hair, Matt Eberfluss. Matt Eberfluss is number eight on this list. 54 years old. We are missing, I think it's Eberfluse. We are missing a 56 year old and a 53 year old.

Here's one of them right here, you ready? Yep. Atlanta's new head coach, Raheem Morris. That is not on the list. That is a strike for Tony. So Jess, the only one left without a strike. We are back to Mike. I don't have a strike.

Oh, Mike doesn't have a strike. No, I don't. Music, music, one left without a strike. We are back to Mike. I don't have a strike. Oh, Mike doesn't have a strike. No, I don't. Music. Music. Doing a lot. Music, please. All right, someone said Ron Rivera, and there was an older coach that replaced him.

Is it Dan Quinn? Dan Quinn is number nine on this list. So there's one more answer here. Mike doesn't have a strike. Jess doesn't have a strike. Roy, Tony, and Jeremy all have one. We go over to Roy. What? That means out. Oh, Tony, and Jeremy all have one. We go over to Roy. What?

That means out. Oh, that means out. Oh, yeah, yes, he strikes out. You punted on the first down. Who's the coach in Vegas? I can't help you there, but I don't think that's right. The coach in Vegas. All right, strike two for Roy.

Who is it? Antonio Piers. That is not. Oh, that's definitely not him. That's the one I knew. I didn't know. Going to hit the music again, and we're back to Jeremy. Maybe a longer bed next time.

Yeah. Maybe not happy birthday. Is Doug Peterson a head coach? Jeremy wins the game! Yay! Somehow with one strike. The game is over! Woo!

Shout out the pitch clock, thanks for that. I, uh, transitioned. I went to Dan's house the other day and when I walked in Quinn his exactly his dog Assaulted me and again with the dog. It's a big dog. He not allowed to have a dog at his house now It's not about it's not about having a dog or not having a dog. It's Dan's reaction Dan yelled at the dog. We talked about this

Blew my mind that like in Dan's world he could have a conversation with this dog and the dog You know, you're right, man I'll try to be now the future was the conversation that they previous had about jumping on people in general or this was like an Amin conversation? I'm like, hey, I wanna talk to you about Amin before he comes over. I don't know, I don't know. But as Jess picks up her dog.

Lovely Willow. Why is there a dog in the studio? Hey, we thought you weren't gonna be in today. We talked about this. We talked about this. I was told to bring her in today. It's a good point. There was an email that went out that said,

Amin will not be in. But then also that you were going to be in. Then it said, the talent that will be here, Amin. So I get why everyone's confused. But it reminded me of the- Calling you talent was very confusing. Oh, god damn. Okay, all right, easy.

I mean, that was uncalled for. Easy there, 2004 with that goatee. We're jocular here. I was going for, I'm trying to date Lana Del Rey. That's what I'm going for right now. That's why I have this look Wow, that's good. Let's throw that image up if we can get a video team of Mike and Lana Del Rey Yeah, Lana Del Rey's boyfriend cuz that go to my god. Oh, wow. That's not even a goatee It's like a goatee with the chin strap thing Has this been confirmed that this is indeed her boyfriend? Is it the guy in the front or in the back?

The guy in the back. The guy in the back. Dude's got a fat lip in. Yeah, he does. Yeah. Somebody won. Look at that. So I don't know, Mike, to answer your question,

these photos went viral last week with people saying this is her new boyfriend. And a lot of jokes were made because he does look a lot like Stu Gutz. But Jeremy tells me this morning, unconfirmed. Yeah. But I don't see, where is he in this picture? He's standing with John Cena in the back somewhere.

Oh, okay. Yeah, unfortunately it seems as though this isn't true that her boyfriend is a gator hunter, which is what that guy's job is. He like takes people on air boats and plays with alligators in Louisiana. But really, that was really good. But really, it was one of the great stories on the internet last week.

The idea that Lana Del Rey was dating this middle-aged gator hunter. Unfortunately, that is not the case. His name is Jeremy, though. Sorry, points for him. I'm happy that you called out the goatee. You clearly know, as someone that's wearing a hat right now, you know the importance of getting the facial hair right. So there was a behind the

bit that aired earlier this week and I couldn't look at it because I knew what happened that day which was I was I screwed up my shaving and I was clean shaven. A lot of face. I was walking outside, I was sweaty and they did not afford me my makeup artist, the lovely Jesse who was outside banging on a door softly to not interrupt the shooting, but knowing how vain I am and how badly I needed that. So I knew when I was recording it, this is about as bad as I'm gonna look,

and I've seen the Bobby Boucher's dad's memes out there. We're boy-toe. We're boy-toe. Oh, shit! Yeah. I haven't seen it though, Mike. Is there a place that I can look at it just to make sure that that's the case, or no?

No, don't ever watch it. It was a great bit, it sounds great. Listen to the bit, but I just knew right then and there, I'm like, I sat down, this is the lighting, I'm this sweaty and I can't have makeup, and I'm clean shaven because I screwed up my shaving job. I am never going to watch this, ever. This is going to be,

this is going to be a life-changing event for me because when the images do show up on my timeline, I'm going to want to change everything about myself. So I screwed up shaving again this week, but I didn't want to be clean shaven because I knew the boy-toe memes were gonna be going on. So I was like, you know what, 20th anniversary, let me just slap on something

that I would've had 20 years ago, and I'm bringing the goatee back. And I've actually had like compliments on the goatee. They're like, it's not that bad, which is for me, when I rock a goatee pretty damn good. Because it's also got like a little bit of like fade to it. It's not sharp, right? 2004 would've been sharp, right?

Sharp lines and everything. A little bit sharper. Yeah. Like the John B. Yeah, yeah. They don't know. That's to America. From other banks?

Yeah. John B. Wow, what a voice. What a voice of an angel. What a friggin' hairstyle. But yeah, I screwed up my shaving again. So like my barber had recently done the thing where I get a thinner beard, and I'm like,

man, I'm starting to look like Dan Lebatard a little bit. Like I don't like this thin beard. I grow a big thick beard, let me get the line a little higher. And so I had grown it out, I trimmed it down, over the weekend, long holiday weekend, I was ready to go. And I started just instinctually shaving it back

in the way that I used to have, stop showing that guys, stop, stop doing that. This is what the Kansas City Chiefs groundskeeper should have just sent back to you. Stop doing that, that's a worse photo. So that's from the video that I'm supposed to listen to audio only, right? Thank you guys.

That's unfair, take that down, man, come on, stop. It does, I look like Bobby Boucher's head, it's irrefutable, it's irrefutable. What a weird, like, obscure reference. I mean, but it's bang on. To the audience, you've known me for 20 years. I was but a boy when you first met me. Allow me to age with some level of grace.

My body is going to change more than Dan's and Stu's over the time, over our time together. I was a teenager when I started on this show. I am now approaching 39 years old and a father. You have to allow me this physical transformation without making me feel too bad about it because pushing 40, and it's not pushing 40 as it's so much drag in the 30s, that's hard enough. The only person that really hasn't changed is me. Yes.

Yeah, you haven't changed whatsoever. We're both exactly the same. You haven't changed whatsoever really. You've aged quite well, Roy. Thank you. And you have the same, I outlined a bunch of excuses. You were like 20 when you started working on this show. Yeah, way to make me feel even worse about the situation.

You should have really gone back 20 years and grown out your bob that you had back then too. I had quite an emo look. The emo Mike pictures make me laugh every single time. The one where I'm pointing? But it's also because there's also that hint of sadness there behind every picture There is actually not a hint. There is legit sad

This is Roy from literally any moment in his life. Yeah, I feel like Roy like when he was 12. He looked like that How's a grown man at eight years old. You've just been the same age your entire life. You had a beard. Man, you look really good, Roy. Thank you, brother. So do you, man. No, I don't. Don't feel bad for yourself, dude.

I do, and I don't. I'm wearing a Columbia shirt. That's how you know it's over. When you start wearing the Columbia. Oh, is it a PFG, though? Those are great shirts for performance fishing gear. They're're so practical no it's so hot down here like they're great shirts but also all Lehman wears to America's I think another Columbia shirt the one the one that I have oh that's the one that you have

that in my three Americans yeah you and me could be partners, just like that tiger wasn't his daddy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha But I read a little bit about it and it seems like something that would be up the show's alley So tell us about it. Okay, so if you've seen Tiger King same guy that made Tiger King for Netflix Has made chimp crazy docu-series for max for HBO, right? But here's the big thing. He said when he did Tiger King like word got out around the like Roadside Zoo people that like this guy's a bad guy because he made all the people in Tiger King look bad So he didn't make them look bad or did they make themselves look I'm telling you from the roadside zoo We don't like saying roadside zoo, but what are they called? What would you?

Know it's not a regular. It's not the San Diego's regular. This is not a San Diego's This is this is a roadside like a home zoo home zoo, okay You got we just have to be able to clarify that this is not like Ron McGill No, Miami's this is this is these homes who are doing it basically It's like when you have like a basketball court like a gym But then you have like a home court in the back of your house kind of like that Yes, but you let people come and play pickup exactly. So Well, is it anything like that Matt Damon movie

we bought a zoo is something like that those types of people yes that kind of people right so so the guy has a bad reputation now among these zoo folk right so they wouldn't give him access so he had to hire basically a dude to be a stand-in a stunt double for him to act as the director. The guy. Trojan horse hit. Oh, he Trojan horse the hell out of it. And the guy is a guy who went to jail

for like smuggling animals into the country. So he's got like the street cred that all these people open up to him and they're just all batshit crazy. Once again, you have to be insane. But the big thing, the reason I brought up Dan and his dog was the way these people treat these chimpanzees, like they're just regular people and stuff.

And I'm like, this is a wild animal. You can't just talk to it and expect it to be cool. So... A domesticated dog is a wild animal? What? No, it's domesticated. No, no, I'm saying what he just said. He got attacked by a wild animal. No, it's domesticated. Is there a chimp attack in this series?

So there's a very famous chimp attack that happened. Almost everyone remembers the story of Bailey. I do remember it. The woman whose face got ripped off by a chimp. That's actually how our show started its relationship with Ron McGill. They asked me to book a guest to talk about the chimp attack. No way.

Yeah, I listen to Paul and young Ron locally, and Ron McGill would occasionally be there. And I watched Sabo do Higante, and I remember Ron with the mustache. I'm like, ah, I listen to Paul and young Ron locally and Ron McGill would occasionally be there and I watched Sabato Higante and I remember Ron with the mustache. I'm like, I got the perfect guy and that's how it started. The chimp attack was patient zero. So watch this full circle. So first of all, almost every chimp that's been involved in a wild-ass attack that went national or whatever, they're all famous. Like not for the attack. So that chimp was actually in, if you guys a more old navy at the mic

fifteen years ago with morgan fairchild and it's a bit there on the beach or whatever that's the chip that ripped the face off really like them this is a famous chip that did this so the story goes the woman's friend came over and that you had been aggressive before but she didn't want to say anything because she thought that they were going to take

the chimp away. So her friend comes over and brings an Elmo doll because the chimp likes Elmo. And the chimp just goes berserk. Tears it apart? Tears her apart, right? So wait, the woman whose face got ripped off wasn't the chimp's owner.

Not the owner. It was her friend. Her friend was coming over. And this chimp is famous. His name is Travis? Travis the chimp. Travis the chimp. She calls 911. It was a friend. Her friend was coming over. And this chimp is famous. His name is Travis? Travis the Chimp. Travis the Chimp. She calls 911. The cops show up. The cops know the chimp because he walks around town and stuff and they know, oh hey Travis, whatever. So the cop is in the car and he's like,

I've never seen Travis like this. And so Travis comes up to the car and he says, I swear to God, the guy, he said, I got my gun out because I don't know what's going to happen. I'm thinking he's going to say, Travis punches through the glass. And then he shoots him. He said, this chimp ripped the door off. Ripped the door off. And so you hear the thing of like, she's still on the phone with 911. And you hear the pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, shoots him four times.

You know what the chimp did? He walks back in the house. He took times. You know what the chip did? He walks back in the house. He took four. Looked at the guy walk back in the house. I got. What is this? An episode of the boys? It was insane. I'm like, what the hell? Travis, the real one. Just shout out to Travis. R. P. Travis. He hooked up man. I assume he died after this. He died inside the house. Yes, but ripping the door off though, is do I like, I know chimps are strong when they said he ripped the car door off the hinges. Like that's, I'm sorry, man. Like how could anyone want that?

Not familiar with your game for real, man. I'm like, damn planet apes did not show us this. I'm gonna say that right now. Horses, but you know, I'm gonna see that tweet about the starilling traps. Riding horses, but you know. Ripping off the board. Did you see that tweet about the Starliner, which is like, all right guys, we have eight months to play the greatest joke in history on these two people returning back to Earth. Yes, yes. Everybody's gotta buy a chip outfit.

Did you see the latest development with the Boeing Starliner? I think we talked about it last week, that they're staying, they're stuck up there till February. No, no, no, I'm talking about, there's a new development. There's audio of it. There is this weird sonar sound that is emanating

from the ship that they're picking up from the ISS. And there's audio of it. It's just pinging like actual sonar. No one knows what this noise is. It wasn't, this wasn't the noise? Pfft, pfft, pfft. Jesus Christ. You know what?

You're out there for six months. I mean, at some point you gotta give it a shot, right? If you search the internet, everyone's wondered, has anyone banged in space at a certain point? Can you? What club is that? No one has ever documented this. How do you get it up?

If you Google it, if you Google it, the word on the internet is no one's ever had sex in space. But it's like, I wonder. Once you get it up, you can't get it down. That's the problem. Is it like, does it work the same way? Like, I don't know. Well, also, it's just like, clean up's gotta be.

Oh, well, you gotta bag it up. I can understand how that could be a very messy proposition. But then also, if you're up there, I don't think you would have packed condoms. That would be a really, really ambitious move. It's like, all right, got my toothpaste, got my toothbrush. You never know. Couple sleeves of Trojans.

Space baby. Throw those gold sleeves in there. All right, we get to go. So there's a pinging noise? Yeah. Yeah, there's a pinging noise. Like an alien in the ship? No one knows where it's coming from.

No one, I'm sure the internet's running wild. I have a 40 second clip of an astronaut being asked if anyone's ever had sex in space. Give it to me. Do you think anyone has ever had sex in space? Good question. I think on the shuttle, I might be wrong here, but I think there may have been a married couple

on the shuttle that have been in space. Not to say that they had sex whilst they're in space but I think that there has been the opportunity shall we say. So do you think anyone's ever had sex? I mean we can just stop it there. If a married couple's been in space you know they're looking at each other like hey I mean. Want to go on the 10,000 mile hike? You got to! You're in space what like what else are you going to do? Got to chase after that condom as it floats away. I mean, you almost have to do it for humanity. This is a very important data point. You can forget being married.

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Stugats a lot of walks, but I'm on base when it comes to sex Other other dudes they can be giambi You know your role you play. I know my role. This is the Don LeVatar Show with the Stugats. You guys, you hear me doing authentic Hollywood lingo? What Hollywood lingo did you do? I said this is my level. Oh, okay. Levels. that all of them what all the women who did you do this at this is my level seven all of the uh... uh... tony tried to level up with you a second ago because you're very busy man

and you're here for hollywood stuff and you got like seven minutes and tony immediately says he's got no time for dinner he's got no time for anything bill lorne's uh... creator of all your favorite television shows and tony i'd comes by him and says, hey, we got a game tomorrow night, or tomorrow morning, and Bill's like, I'm in. All day. You did The Sopranos?

What, what, what? Yeah, I created The Sopranos. You didn't know that? He did The Wire, he did The Sopranos, he did Breaking Bad. What if I just started saying shows I created? Yeah, I created MASH. I created K-Line.

TJ Hooker? Created The Evening News. Hogan's heroes. He did Ted Lasso, Scrubs, Shrinking, Spin City, and now he's got Bad Monkey, which is really a great tribute to Carl Hyacin. But Tony got him a game, and Lawrence will show up. He does not have time.

Look, man, he's a big Hollywood hotshot, and he's got like seven minutes. But somehow, I didn't get dinner, and you did get a basketball game. Ball. By the way, this is the, the bottom line is people say things to you that stick with you for life.

And I think Tony on the show said that I had a good dad game like an old man game. Excellent. Such an insult. That's not an insult. I meant from the deepest part of my heart, like he's 55. He thinks he's still a young man. All men that age do look at my bangs. Like I'm boyish. I mean, an insult. I meant it from the deepest part of my heart. He's 55. He thinks he's still a young man. All men that age do.

Look at my bangs. I'm boyish. I mean, come on. So upsetting, man. And by the way, any time I make a shot in my game back home, both my boys say, solid dad game. And they just torture me with them. Now, tell me, if I may walk down this path with you,

solid dad game. Let me guess, bank shots? A lot of bank shots for Mr. Lawrence? He's got the bank shot in the bag. He doesn't use it a ton. OK. I've seen it. Up and unders?

Up and unders for sure. Up and unders all day, man. Kevin McHale, you know, when I was a kid, watching him constantly. Pump fakes, pump fakes. It's got to be pump fakes. Pump fakes all day long, by the way. Especially from underneath the hoop,

he can give you the up and under and kind of go around and use some English off the glass. He's got that in his bag, too. There we go. But not playing very much. Says he's out of shape because he's busy making hit TV shows. They all say that.

Still playing twice a week, what's up? Are you a competitive maniac? Are you competitive at basketball the way you are at making television shows? Are you competitive? Yeah, I've lost my mind. I'm sitting weird because I was on a vacation with my family and I was a huge tennis player

as a young guy. And there's a pro playing with another family that I knew who I thought was a little too cocky and I became convinced that in doubles I could beat the pro with. And he won four straight sets. I became convinced that in doubles I could beat the pro with and He won four straight sets and the fifth set we won. I threw out my back. I've not told him I'm admitting it right now. I'm painkillered up right now with a drink. It's gonna be perfect And I shook his hand and tried to walk to my car without limping and I went home and I was on my back for two

Days, That was four days ago. How did you win the... I got a monster serve, dude. I was a for real tennis player, yeah. High school and then tried to play in college but could not because I sucked. And so you're Isner. You're somebody with a giant serve. I still got a big serve. And you legitimately beat him but the victory you weren't able to conceal. Here's what happened. It was doubles, and I can't serve

like I did in high school and college anymore for more than 20 minutes, or bad things happen. And I just went for it. And I was serving bombs for a set, and by the end, my hand was asleep. You're like, am I having a heart attack right now? Right, when you're trying to shake the guy's hand and you're like moving your hand up, you're like, yeah, no, great.

But it was worth it for beating a guy that I only know as Doug. I don't even know his last name. Yeah, it's the male pride right there. You'll be in bed for two days, your back will hurt, but you can tell the story. I beat Doug in that fifth one that He had nothing for my circuit dog And by the way, I will never play him again. I don't care if he's a regular listener. There's no rematch Put it on the pole jujou at Leviton shows suck it Doug. Yes or no Are you competitive about making television show? Oh man, you know, I didn't I didn't expect to have a career

Renaissance in my mid-50 man, you know, I didn't, I didn't expect to have a career Renaissance in my mid fifties, you know? I'm so lucky to get to do what you all get to do and be around people. I'd want to spend time with anyways and, uh, uh, do this stuff. I, I, I'm not competitive about it. I get angry when other people are very good. I don't know if you guys have that. So like, uh, I'll tell you an example. There's a Broadway musical years ago called Book of Mormon that Dre and Matt wrote, the guys that

do South Park. And I remember going, the first couple weeks was on and it was really good and everybody's having a good time. But you know, two minutes in, I was like, f**k these guys. Just so annoyed that they could do something like that. So anytime somebody can do something I can't, I find it very, very upsetting. That's funny that you should say that because the only time I had felt that in my life professionally was in college when I was reading Gary Smith

in Sports Illustrated and I wanted to be a writer and halfway through the article I took the magazine and threw it across the room. It's annoying. Because I'm like I'll never be able to be this good. I can be creative but I can't be this creative. No, the name drop coming in if anybody wants to be ready for a name drop. Look at me, yeah. So I was talking to Conan O'Brien, what's up? He's an old buddy. And we're actually talking about what he's doing in the podcasting world now and in his

world and what you guys are doing. And for me to even peripherally get to cruise by and say, hey, I can at least tell myself in my head that I could have been involved in stuff like this because this is the pipe dream, man. My fantasy when I was a kid was to be a talk show host like Letterman we used to stalk him at the Vista market where he would stop on his way to work in the morning so I went to high school in the next town and even to be around this craziness and this ridiculousness is it's worth the getting lost in the parking lot trying to find my way in here. Yes it's not it's a parking garage in a building it's a strange place well it's not as strange as the last place. Look we were telling Bill in the in the

break room over there the people getting shot like yeah man all the way until that we moved out. Some would argue that that made it more exciting. We don't miss it the show that you're doing now Bad Monkey to has the it factor by the way, I'm just gonna Tainted jury though He's a dolphin fan though, he's been a dolphin fan all his life as a kid This is the most exciting dolphin time that we've had this century? It's ridiculous. It's all happening for me right now. I don't know if you guys remember. So it's Sixers.

Yeah, they're going to get out of the East with Paul George this year. Whatever. I'll come back and how dare you laugh that hard. And the Phillies. Phillies are going the whole way this year. Sorry. No flyers, no? No.

And the Dolphins? Hockey is for weirdos. Dolphins. God damn it. Where's Roy? JD Vance is a fan I guess. Dolphins, I think it's an AFC Championship year for the Dolphins. I really do. I'm scared about the offensive line as everybody is, but that's

the stuff that always seems to get put together so we'll see. I'm scared of the Jets and I don't feel like very many people are. I feel like everybody's looking at Buffalo and they're not paying attention to the Jets. I don't feel like very many people are. I feel like everybody's looking at Buffalo and they're not paying attention to the Jets. The Jets are the favorite to win the division right now. That's crazy.

You wanna hear, alright, I made a bet in our writer's room last week, shrinking writer's room. Cause I've been psychic this year. I'll tell you two different things I said. I want them both on the record. One was long before this election started with, everybody looks to waste time in writer's rooms. I bet the writers, I said, I would bet you money

that neither Donald Trump nor Joe Biden are running for president when it comes time to vote. And so I'm 50% of the way there. Wow. And so. That's a bold ass bet to me. Yeah, no, I said, by the way, not bad, right? They had to give me 20 to one odds

and I bet every writer writer hundred bucks in the restroom uh... which i uh... uh... i could lose or a uh... i could win i forgot my train of thought was the thing we're just talking about something to tell you another matter you've got two things that you want to do is right was the other one that we mentioned just now uh... you'll do well that was it any sports related things was it was it team related you just said you've got winning. Sixers, Phillies. Flyers.

Flyers, no. No, you lost it? It's okay. Hockey for weirdos. Hockey for weirdos, no, I'm out. JD Vance, yeah. I'm out. You don't have any of it?

Okay, you're out. By the way, that's what happens when you're given a tequila after no sleep. That's tequila? Yes, it's a margarita. Cuervo tequila. No. Thought it was just lemon juice.

Lemon juice, what are you drinking? The tequila that invented tequila. Bad monkey. I suggest that you watch it on Apple TV for a lot of reasons. One, Bill Lawrence doesn't make bad things. Two, if you like me are a fan of Carl Hyacin and his books, he does a really amazing meticulous job of the following.

And it's three different things that Bill is doing and i don't know if there are others that he's honoring him with uh... one of them is uh... making south florida and key west authentic in a way i haven't seen a whole lot of on television he took a lot of details to make that so environmentally he's using a lot of animals to honor the work that carl hyacinth has done and the characters the least Carl Hyacin character on bad monkey is Vince Vaughn Vince Vaughn is just Vince Vaughn Vince Vaughn is always

Vince Vaughn it works. By the way that's old Vince Vaughn right come on. How does that work when you're like doing the show do you just say to him hey be Vince Vaughn and then he does it I don't think he'd take that as a compliment say the same way. I think you mean in this one now the Look the best thing you can do when you write something for Vince is he'll say it the way you wrote it And then you're like hey, why don't you do your thing? And then when someone comes up and compliments you for something he made up himself you just go. Thank you It is very authentic, but I do have a major gripe I've watched a handful of

episodes here you try to convince the nation that someone driving up from the Keys no no no no I've obsessed over this that was someone driving from Keebus game not an hour and a half and it was offensive to anyone that's ever made that drive. It's like that. There were many times that we were in Coconut Grove and Coral Gables and not in Key West, but he was trying. By the way, no one, at first, in the writers' room, we were trying to do the math and logic that shit out,

and it's like 4 o'clock in the afternoon. You want to go to Key West for dinner? Good luck, right? I mean, Miami Vice, they went to Cuba for mojitos. So it's not as bad as Dexter having a dock in Kendall. But I mean, this was pretty bad. I will tell you, though, if you watch the show, there's always a time passage we just don't ever

say that you just spent four hours away from the story. No one in their right mind is going to and from Key Biscayne when they're going back to the Keys. It makes no sense. What's he going over there for? That's valid. Vince was con- He's going to see Tommy Biscayne. Vince was concussed in the last episode and drove from Key- from the Keys to Miami.

Very dangerous. By the way, outside is it that no one outside- like no one- people that don't have roots here have no idea. You know, there's going to be- my hope is that a bazillion people come to Miami for vacation and go, and then one afternoon, if we're bored, we can just go to Key West. I enjoy, I enjoy catching those things, Mike. When I say that he's meticulous about trying to feel authentically South Florida, I enjoy that he's, that Vince Vaughn is jumping through a plain, a glass window in Key West allegedly and I'm like that's the Grove that's not obviously coconut grow liar and a cheater Bill Lawrence Ted Lasso shrinking

spin city and bad monkey both of those are coming back right you've got you have Ted Lasso coming back and scrubs coming back they're both coming scrubs yeah I guess scrubs is coming Roy scrubs is coming back what's up I'm excited the I don't know if I'm allowed to say that this is actually the first time I said it out loud but yeah I think scrubs you can't tell Dan anything I know he hadn't told me that was reported somewhere he has I think there's rumors out there but I'm feeling pretty confident it's just yeah by the way Hollywood breaking news, we'll see. Yeah, right here on the Dan Levitage show.

There it is. Very hopeful, be fun. Well, how is it, this is an interesting thing, right? Because I have found Apple is generally, we had a first look deal, Metal Arch Media did with Apple the first year, and Apple has a lot of layers of bureaucracy that make it so that John Stewart has to leave after doing good work there How is it that you exist in this ecosystem?

When they're very careful about what they greenlight because Apple doesn't want to make anything that's too dangerous. Yeah, right You know Hollywood is about leverage and I think Ted Lasso bought me Leverage, because it kind of established the brand there. And I'll tell you some funny things to watch. The only thing I've still had to stick with on Apple TV, you guys gotta watch for this,

is it's an Easter egg if you watch any shows. None of the bad guys or villains or bad girls are allowed to use Apple phones. I was gonna ask that question. So you can spot the bad guy in any show right away if they've got some kind of Samsung thing. He's got an Android. I'm telling you, because there's a character

bad monkey ain't gonna ruin it. And I'm like, but that character's a good person. But they're not using an Apple phone. Oh, that's weird. Oh, now I gotta sort of, I'm gonna re-watch some shows where it's like a twist who the bad guy is, and then see what kind of phone that they're sporting.

What kind of phone do they have if they're an alien the entire time? Yeah, weird. What kind of phone do they have if they're an alien the entire time? The spoiler alert on the sugar that Mike Ryan ruined, totally ruined for a whole bunch of people. Yeah, by the way,

not a whole bunch of people. By the way, for me, I hadn't watched it. Oh really? Well now I'm sure you want to watch it. Yeah, he's an alien. Alright, I'm back. It was a noir series. It was a whodunit. I was so enraptured by it. And then six episodes, guy turns blue. Surprise! Before you get out of here, Bill, I am wondering,

because I've told Mike Ryan this, that in sports, like conference commissioners are wildly unimpressive, athletic directors are wildly unimpressive, like executives in sports, these people, I've just met a lot of them that aren't impressive. And isn't it amazing though that we assign all these Machiavellian behaviors to them as if they're playing three-dimensional chess and then you meet them in person and you're like, yeah, this guy's not playing tic-tac-toe. That's correct.

But what I was going to say, the people I have met by industry that are even less impressive than them are TV executives. And what I wanted to ask you- Feels like a minefield for me, you guys. Do you have a good story? Do you have a good story of people getting in the way or trying to get in the way of Ted lasso that? Do you have a good story of anybody? Just sort of saying good executive story. The only thing I'd say about Ted lasso is

Apple was the only place that bought it and so I have to at least with a smile on my face be super grateful because we went around town and tried to sell it to everybody there and no one got it and Zach and Jamie actually got it. So what was the feedback? That's a value from the places that said no. I don't know if you guys remember there used to be like these cool Saturday Night Live sketch like commercials for the Premier League.

Yeah. And they all thought it was going to be this loud, silly, you can't convince anybody once they watch something that you're going to do something different. Maybe it's our mistake. We showed those videos and then I said, yo, if you saw my stuff before, it's going to be like scrubs and have a bunch of heart and it's going to be an optimistic show about hope in a shitty time. And they're like, no, it's going to be this goofy sketch.

And I think the guys at Apple were the only ones that believed me. I can tell you two real stories about TV executives for other shows we've mentioned. One was I have on my wall in my office. You used to only be able on network TV to say the word ass like twice. And I had it in the Spin city script four times and a high

level executive without knowing they were being funny wrote me a note that said you have the word ass on page 7 and the word ass on page 19 and the word ass on page 28 and it said please pick your ass and so meticulous just trying to fuck with you. That's on my wall that person did not know Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. project of mine about my best friend who was a doctor, Scrubs, and the dude was sitting as close to me as Dan is, but there's a huge circular room. And about 10 minutes into the

pitch, I just heard actual cartoon song, Wood Snoring. No! Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I said, I was like, yo, I think this pitch is probably not going that well. They woke him and we walked out. That's why that's the one of the only network television shows that was owned by ABC, but it was on NBC. Pete Yeah. And then they brought it back after the days in NBC were done, right? Jared Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pete Last laugh.

Jared And that gentleman or woman I'll never say was long gone. Yeah, it went back, yeah. Pete New episodes every Wednesday on Apple TV, Bad Monkey. He does a great job of honoring a hero of his since he was 15. One of the best columnists in the history of this country and certainly one of the best columnists in the history of Miami, Carl Hyacin. Bill, thank you as always. It's great seeing you. No problem. Two has the effector. Ha! This guy. No one's going to keep a skein from the keys. It just doesn't make any sense. Tua has the IP factor. Ha, this guy. No one's going to keep a skein from the keys. It just doesn't make any sense. Stu Gatz here.

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