The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Jeremy Gets De-Microphoned (feat. Adnan Virk)

Episode Date: August 7, 2025

"Alrighty... back to you." Adnan's here for movies and the NL MVP conversation, but the Shipping Container just wants to do smelling salts and take steroids at 2:17 a.m. in the middle of the night at a Costa Rican bachelor party. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to the big suey, presented by Draft Kings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it.

And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habit. Pitch you a liar. This episode is presented by Draft Kings. Draft Kings, the crown is yours. I have been spending this entire week in Miami. As you know, I've been staring at Marlins Park. And I have been wondering, not just proud of Marlins Park, we're proud of the Marlins.

And I have been trying to figure out how to deal with MVP odds. And our friends at Draft Kings, and the odds, they go up, they go down, according to what people are betting. No, Tani. Last night goes four innings pitched. I'm Jeremy. I'll talk about Otani every day now because he is the MVP and will win the MVP every year that he takes the mound and gets up at the plate. He drove in two runs with the home run last night, gave up one in four-eings pitched. There's no player like him. He's totally unprecedented. We talk about all of these great players in the history of baseball.

But last night, the home run that he hit was 460 feet. So he's doing that on the same night David already told us they make it up They don't even know It's the 460s cool Stackcast has real Projections It's better now

It's good But not it's not You used to make it up So you're math Wait so you're buying the Cal Rale Like made it by a foot thing No Come on

Not at all I mean it's just It's jeremy's exasperated Don't be it's okay Jeremy Don't be exasperated But just know that that was more sacked We're a lot to be excited about things We got excited

And within five seconds it became a debate about whether or not the home run is real. That's my fault. That's all, Zaz. I'm going to get back to Otani and tell you that when you sign a contract and there was a big announcement yesterday in Boston that got my attention because I loved it so much, a young player, Roman Anthony, is going to sign a new deal. But the maximum amount of the deal that was announced, $230 million, he has to win the MVP every year for the next nine years. It's the stupidest thing in the history of contract. What's the floor of it? $130 million.

You're not too shabby. Not too shabby. It beat Corby and Carol. It's pretty good. But people are going around saying, oh, he's going to make $2.30. And then they read the fine print. He has to win the MVP every year for nine years to get $2.30.

Do you think that makes writers uncomfortable? By telling you the fact that when you give, they want to give big numbers. People love seeing big numbers. But I mean, it makes writers uncomfortable. Like if it's late in the season and, all right, he's in the MVP conversation. He's in the race. And you're voting who to give the.

award to. The NBA is the biggest thing because you can do all NBA. Right, right. And that changes the max deal. Yeah. So they put a $10 million bonus essentially every year on it. It's plus and plus an all-star, but it's just stupid. You're not going to get it. I looked up a longest home run hit by a pitcher. You're going to like this one, Jeremy. Haddeo Nomo hit a 575 foot home run during the Japanese League All-Star game. I mean, it's here. You think I just made that number? Number up. Right here. Deo Nomo, 575 foot homeruner on Tokyo Dome. No.

Japanese all stock in 1990. Also, John Gray hit a 467 foot home run in 2017. But does that course feel? Didn't Colorado hit one that was like 500 something? Like the middle of the upper decade. My favorite's the Bryce Harper legend that in high school he hit one 550 feet with the aluminum bat. But I mean, the craziest thing about the Otani thing last night is it's four innings, one run, eight strikeouts. He hits a home run, drives into, they lose five to three. And that's with the Dodgers. That sounds like what he used to do with the Angels.

To have that happen with the Dodgers, he's the MVP. The real question becomes, well, the real question becomes, like, who's second, who's third, who's fourth, because the National League has a bunch of really interesting candidates, ultimately including Kyle Stowers. But Kyle Schwerber is probably going to be above him with good reason. He has been unbelievable for the Phillies. Yeah, what a year for him. Can it get paid?

As he should. Kyle Stowers, do you have him high in the MVP race? Yeah, I think that Kyle Stowers absolutely deserves to be high in the MVP race. He's third in the National League in OPS. He's taken a team in the Miami Marlins that were not supposed to be all that much and really buoyed their lineup for the huge portion of the year. He has, I believe, three walk-off home runs. He has multiple games where they won and he was the only guy driving in any run.

runs. He actually plays a position, unlike the two guys ahead of him in Shohei Otani and Kyle Schwerber, who are only designated hitters. He's been pretty solid. You can't make that case for Otani. No, Otani's different. I said he should be the NBA. That is weird. A minute ago, we were praising him. No, no, no, no. I'm saying in terms of hitting, right? It's a different thing. And Otani is a freak all of his own, right? He's at the beginning. But then you start to get to Pico Armstrong, who hasn't had a great second half the way you lit the world on fire at the beginning. You get to Mani Machado. I think that there's at least reason to consider a player like Stowers, although I know Adnan Verk totally disagrees with me. Well, you know, Adnan is here and I'm so

thankful to have him on our show. Hello, Adnan. It's really good to see here on the Dan Levitars show. I just want to congratulate you being welcome back to Miami. That was a great story. The president was reaching open arms to have you back there. I still want to hear more about the nude beach with Larry Bindfest, if you don't mind. Well, that listen, I can't disclose more than that, except to tell you that it wasn't, it didn't suck. And I did have my eyes up more than not because it's critical at a nude beach where your eyes are. But Adnan, you're coming here,

and I would love to just talk about movies with you. Please, pick a gun, David. We're back. We have a comedy in movie theaters. This is amazing. And it's great. Have you gone to the theater to see it? I went opening night, David.

I took my 14-year-old son. I said, buddy, I laughed uproariously. When the first one came out, he said, Dad, what's uproarious mean? I said, don't worry about it. We're going to go watch. We're going to have a blast. 27 minutes of trailers, David.

Not for the trailers and the commercials, please. Can we stop? AMC. apparently now is, they just put on a statement yesterday. They're going to start to work on this a little bit. Thank God. 85-minute movie. That's five minutes of credits. It's a comedy actually in theaters.

Liam Neeson is fabulous. As you and I know, Leslie Nielsen was a dramatic actor. His entire career, when he did the naked gun, it was a lark. It was like, wait, he's going to do a comedy. Similarly, Liam Neeson has such great gravitas. We saw that in Schindler's list. We've seen him be an action star. Him doing a comedy is absolutely.

brilliant. It's great casting. Him and Pamela Anderson have wonderful chemistry. They've been canoodling together on the red carpet. Not every gag works. Okay, I get that. There's some misses along the way. It's not the original. Of course, the original is an all-time classic, but it's very funny. I know you're going to enjoy it. Ednan, did you show your son the original before you took him to this? That's all I did. And there was a few, you know, questionable moments. I was like, oh, that part. I'm like, hey, you know, it's going to be a little quick on that one. And I said, Derek, listen, the thing with the naked gun is there's no profanity, Zasel. Even in the new one, there's not one. There's not one.

four-letter word uttered, but there's a sexually suggestive content here. They're kind of cover his eyes for his sec. But he did like the original lot. So you cover his eyes for the sex part, but not the violence part. Is that? Are we just clear that that's how you wrote? We're okay with violence and, quite frankly, there's a little bit of profanity because we can't cover his ears that quickly.

Anything with sex, and I've got to cover his eyes a little bit. I, again, for the record, and I'm not going to make an issue like Mike did about this. However, I don't get it. I don't get Adnan. you're at a movie theater and there's about to be a pair of boobs and you're like, oh my God, stop the presses. Wait a minute, there's a machine gun

that's killing someone, please. It's a lot easier to explain to a kid that that's fake. That murder, that actually didn't happen. Boobes, it's like a dick. I don't want to have this conversation. That nipples real adon. All right, it's the dog days of summer

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That good. I have the beards grown out a little bit. I got a little life in my face, I feel like. Little tan, Colorado, San Francisco. got a great time. You get life on your face. You've got death on your face. I think you've got 40 to life on your face. This is the Dan Levitar show with the Stugats. Do you believe that Kyle Stowers, do you know, Adnan, that Kyle Stowers was the throw-in in the Rogers trade here in Miami?

It's a great story, David, as you know, is that everyone said, okay, hey, Michael Ice never wants to part with anybody. Wow, he's giving up Norby. prize prospects. He didn't get Rogers. Rogers, as you know, was terrible last season. He's actually been pretty good this year. He's lights out this year. Right. He's been very good. So it's helped redeem that trade from Michael Isis. But, yeah, Stowers is a throw. And listen, I try to give love to my friends, right? I know Jeremy does a phenomenal job with the pitch clock. Quite frankly, he's keeping me in the metal arc family by having me on the pitch clock once a month. So I appreciate that. Hey, hey, hey, the hockey show. Hey, the hockey show as well, thank you to Roy, both those guys.

And the main show. Other than that. Other than those three shows. Appearance coming to nothing personal. And that's a full-time employee, actually. but uh congrats on your co-hosting gig on supatity i see you i appreciate that mike yeah stew is keep me in the mix as well um back to jeremy i want to give a little love right it's like if university of mayiam he had a big win i would text mike ryanma hey congrats to you buddy so with tachet i text i'm like hey man stowers 25 home runs first homer off the lefty his response david was stowers should absolutely be second or third in mbp voting do i have to come down there and smack the south florida at him i love pal stowards it's a great story i'm rooting for the marlins i interviewed

Yuri Perez and MLB tonight this week, which I also texted Jeremy about, Luis, the translator, fantastic. I told me, Perez, I said, Yonder Alonzo, fellow Miami guy, said that Yuri Perez reminds of an eel. In 20-plus years of broadcasting, I've never asked other man this. If you were a fish, what kind of fish would you be? Yuri laughs and says, I'd be a whale, because I'm huge. So I don't know if he's a humpback or a beluga whale, but I love Yuri Perez. I love what the Marlins are doing, but Stowers is not second or third at MVP voting. Otani, Machado, Schwerber, PCA. There's a ton of other. Juan Soto, Pete Alangelo, there's a lot of guys ahead of him. It's the Machado one that really kills me and PCA.

If you look at weighted runs created Plus. No, I mean, what do we care about in this thing? Okay, you want batting average? You want batting average? We could do batting average in home runs. You prefer that? How about this? There's two guys in baseball hitting over 290 in terms of batting average with 25 or more home runs.

You know who they are? Kyle Stowers and Aaron Judge. Those are the only guys in baseball. If you look at weighted runs created plus, he's fourth in the National League. He's sixth overall in Major League Baseball. Machado, 13th. PCA, 25th. Now, understandably, both of those guys are elite defensively at their positions. Machado, not the same way that he used to be.

And I know what Adnan Verk's going to say. He's going to say, hey, since 1997, the Padres haven't had a guy to lead the league and hits. Not since Tony Gwyn. You know who has a better batting average? Kyle Stowers. He's been better on a team where for half the year, they couldn't figure out who to put behind him in the lineup. He had guys like Matt Mervis, who's been DFA'd since then hitting. behind him.

Stinks. And on the Padres, there are real guys hitting behind him. PCA has Kyle Tucker hitting behind him. Kyle Schwabber even, he's been spectacular. Obviously, he should be above. To me, offensively, his valuable is there. Kyle Tucker's better than him. In terms of the statistics, in terms of the impact,

Kyle Stowers has led a team that everyone anticipated being one of the two to three worst teams in Major League Baseball to the level of success where there's six games behind the San Diego Padres for a wildcard spot. They have an opportunity with a crazy road trip coming up. Five games and four days in Atlanta, three games against the Red Hot Guardians, three games against the Red Sox. If they can get through that and get back home

and Kyle Stowers continues to be on fire, I just think the deeper we get into this, he's going to get, he should get the type of consideration to be second or third in MVP. He really should. He really should. I understand why Otani's always going to be number one.

he should be right what he did last night is ridiculous he's always going to be there and for that matter kyle schwarber ridiculous year he's been unbelievable i i am having a tough time after those two finding anyone that should 100% be voted for above kyle stowers i really do believe me desponding about that whole diatribe is watching billy and mike just disinterested this is their team disinterested i'm in on it i just i mean i've been part of the chat where i've been seeing people saying Kyle Stour should be serious in the MVP conversation. I'm like, okay, this is a little ridiculous. Even Billy, who is an avid Marlins family.

I don't understand why. Well, I mean, because... If Sauer's got a top 10 MVP vote, that'll be a remarkable achievement. He could just name it all of the top five, top seven, but like the idea that he's going to make a serious run. You want another one? You want another one to back it up? Let's do it one more time.

It's okay. I'd rather talk about Hedington. Okay. They have a losing record. But let's talk about wrestling on what streaming program it's on for another hour. Uh-oh. Wow, Mike.

It's our local team. That was the local hour, right? Another week and a half before we see Jeremy again. Yeah, I'll never be back here. Really something. Just excited about our local team. I have lost control, Adnan. You come on here and this is what the issue is.

We're trying to make you a part of our great family while you're swiping at our toes. Starr was also like he's had a good... Throwing things up against Samson. I apologize. He's had a good month and a half, which is why he's in all these conversations. He had a story. like a really, really great two months to start the year, then had 30 games where he didn't hit a home run. He was awful. And we all thought that, all right, it was a fluke. And then over 33

games, home runs, RBIs. Did you just de-micrphone him? Is that it, Mike? Turned it off. That's what we call it. So we're now, oh, is this? I call it demicrofoam. He microphoneed him. I like it. I think that's a word. Verk, you said something that bothered Zaz, and I want to make sure that I have it right. Did you say Superman sucked? Oh, yeah, I thought it was terrible. Adnan.

Oh, come on, man. I liked it. But let's hear the sake. Yeah, Zaz, I'm so excited to go see it. I say, I see the trail. I'm going to take my kids. Here we go. First, I don't want to say, I'm just like Francesa.

Because somebody's set with the eight and a half minute rant, and I said, I'm not going to watch it. With respect to Mike Frances, I don't need to see his movie opinions. I go, no, you've got to see this. I've got to be honest. Mike Francis said, more ripe than long in his review. what's with the dog enough with the dog i don't care about crypto it's the whole movie's about the dog also my main issue is as low way too much of mr terrific and i know james gun did a brilliant

one of the highlights of the movie now now gunn did a great job with guardians of the galaxy because he had these different characters and i get that there's a myriad of options you can root for fantastic first guardians was fabulous but in superman i want superman it's a superman movie i want to see superman against licks luther i don't have mr terrific hijacking as you said one of the best sequences of the movie. Why is he being featured? He's, he, Louis Lane's running shotgun, Mr. Terrific. It was ridiculous. I'm stunned. I'm stunned. I'm stunned. I'm stunned. I, I, I'm stunned with this. I, I don't know the last time I enjoyed a movie as much as I enjoyed Superman. I had a smile on my face at, and the entire movie, the entire time I was

on the theater. I love that movie. Like, you didn't have fun watching that movie? I was introduced to Mr. Terrific. I thought he did a great job. Look, I know the Superman character and I know its limitation. So I like being introduced to other characters that have a little bit more depth to them. And by the way, the dog was a great decision because people struggle to find connection points to Superman. We've seen the story so many times and he's perfect. He's got the one weakness, but everyone loves a dog. And that really helped endear this character in ways that quite frankly, Warner Brothers has really struggled to do with since Christopher Reeve. Adnan, did you at least like David Cornswain?

Couldn't disagree with Mike Moore. To me, it felt like such an obvious attempt to play to the young audience, to kids, and to every dog over out there. It's nothing to do with the movie. It doesn't help the movie at all. It doesn't help the narrative. It's just ridiculous. Oh, there's a dog.

I won't cheer for the dog. He may not even be a good dog, but he's alone and he's scared. Mike, I also didn't. I also didn't think the guy was a great Superman. I'm not thinking everybody has to be Christopher. Oh, he was solid. I don't think he's got charisma. He was solid.

He was solid. Superman's a tough role to have charisma for him. I thought he was a great superman. I thought he was really good. But it's okay. I appreciate the perspective. I really do. Mike and I can agree in Eddington.

Can we talk Ari Aster? Oh, the master of horror, even though he doesn't describe himself as a horror guy. Now, Eddington, not a horror. It seems as though Ari Aster wants to be a dark comedy guy. And Eddington, I have this theory, Adnan, that is going, the movie is going to blow up when it hits the streamers for, like, exclusively word of mouth. because of how perfect this movie presented that whole very confusing time in COVID. It's about COVID, early stages of COVID in a New Mexico town, and it is an equal opportunity offender.

I think some of the biggest laughs were the jokes at the progressives' expense. And then, as Ari Aster is one to do, he does his... Hell of a left hook then. He does his twist, and it may lose people because of that twist, like often his movies do to certain segments of the population, but I thought it was a great movie. I thought it was really funny, a really good dark comedy. Yeah, I liked it a lot of these as well.

Listen, the twist didn't necessarily work for me. It went in a much, much darker, more severe tone, but I appreciate Ari Aster has a singular vision. He makes movies like nobody else does out there, and the first time I thought was laugh out loud funny. Like Mike said, guys, I'm not the first guy in line to see a COVID comedy. I'm like, we have to live through the process. I'm not sure how much more could be said about it,

but it's particularly skewing towards the left, which I thought was really well done and well charmed and scathing and great performances as well from Joaquin Phoenix and Pedro Pascal. I really enjoyed it. Although I do kind of, to Mike's hinting, I wish he'd go back those movies he did at the beginning.

Like I love hereditary, I love Midsomar. I made those horror movies. But I was afraid I enjoyed. It was certainly a good experiment, and I did like Edding Tim, but I'd love to see him both back those horror movies, but a different movie to see it the multiplex.

Can I interest you in Augustine Ramirez's rookie of the year, at least? Because three multi-home-one game, good. Two multi-solen base games thus far in 89 games of his career. You're the first guy to do that. All righty. Back to you guys.

I did hear Billy mention that the other day. Listen, I love Drake Baldwin. I push for him for the Braves. And if Ms. Zaraski gets some more starts, obviously, in the aisle. But Augustia Ramirez has been great. No question. Adnan, I am very excited for a movie that is coming out this week. And Mike's into it also.

I've been looking forward to this movie for months now. I already have my tickets. We're going tomorrow afternoon. Me and my boys. We love horror films. Are you interested in weapons? I have not as much of a horror guy is used as so I am not running out to get tickets or taking my boys

but listen I'm intrigued by it certainly anything is better than War the Worlds in Ice Cube I heard you guys discussing that the 2% rotten tomatoes remeer shout up to David by the way who wanted the IMDB score Cody just wanted to give him a rotten tomatoes David's like I want the IMDB score is it under four or not anyways needless segue I'm not seeing weapons I hope you enjoyed Zaz I'm sure it'll be good

Mike he's not going to see weapons I mean it's got 100% on rotten tomatoes It's got a good cast. It's got... Zaz, you want to know... I want to know why the kids are leaving. Don't you want to know? It's 2.17 a.m. in the middle of the night.

The kids are running out of the homes. They're never coming back. Don't you want to know why? 2.17 am is the middle of the night, Zaz. You don't have to say 2.17 a.m. in the middle of the night. Well, maybe, you know, again, Lord's time zone. No, Lord's... It's still 2.17 a.m.

Okay. I want to know when Eddington is streaming because that's what I've been waiting for. And I want... You get worked up about not able to find your NFL. And then it works me. up is. I have to go look around at every streamer and see when Bad Shabbas is

going to start streaming. Aren't you a sag member? Why don't you get like screeners? Yeah, I get the screeners. Yeah, no, David, weren't you in Dumb and Dumber or something? No, what was it? Three Stooges. I was not a sag member, though I'm joining a union shortly. Okay. I can talk about that. That's a little spoiler alert. Just to go in and bust it from the inside?

Maybe. Break it up. Old Trojan horse. I want to go to David's point, but when something is not streaming. David, are you like me? You get so freshly to go, fine. Screw it. I'll buy it. I want to watch Barney's version with Paul Giamati. It's not streaming. I'll pay $20. I'll get the physical media and I'll put it my DVD player and enjoy the Blu-ray. Do you do that? I accept that I don't have a Blu-ray player or a DVD player anymore. Are you excited? Are you going on a book tour? I am. Thank you for mentioning, buddy. Cineafile is the book. It's

available right now. Mango Publishing Group.com, which of course published. Greg Cody's book. So they're there in Miami. Shut up to Hugo. You can go to Amazon.com. Wherever books are sold. August 26, the book comes out. Yes, I'll be on tour. Maybe, maybe, maybe, me and David Samson together in New York City. We shall see. I can only imagine how great it will be to read all of Adnan's movie views and views on life because he's Adnan's as, and his opinions, frankly, are more important with movies than yours.

It's not a competition, you know, like whatever. It's always a competition. All right. Adnan, thank you. Thank you, David. And one last shout out to, listen, people forget the fact, Samson's loyalties to Wisconsin. How about the Brewers? Best team in baseball.

Pat Murphy, he's eating pancakes of his pocket. pocket, love it. Go brew crew. Ednan, just had to get that in. Can't wait for him to be as right about the MVP stuff as he was about predicting the Diamondbacks and Royals to go to the World Series at the beginning of the year. That's tough, though, Jeremy. Don't do that. Don't be that guy. Who is your preseason pick? I didn't pick anybody. That's why I shove it off on you guys.

How'd a boy, Samson. Oh, of course. I'm just having some fun. It's not right. It's just not right. It's not right for me to have fun right here. I apologize for having fun, Jeremy, right now. I apologize. I'll look directly at the camera. I apologize for having enthusiasm and having fun.

I want accountability. He looks great, though. Look how thin he looks. Remember all the fish we made fun of them for cooking? Like, it's paying off. All the healthy lunches. His arms are incredibly shiny. He looks sick.

Just amazing. Thanks. I will say this, David, right before the show came in, we were complimenting him saying, you look good. Like, he's like, yeah, I feel great. I go, that's going to change real soon. Yep. It's 10.1.m.

And it's totally. Yeah, Mornay, go, that's going to get you to that feeling. That's going to change about 20 minutes. A week and a half away from this place. He said he's got a little thinner for health purposes and not for to look better. It is. I was like, you liar. No, genuinely.

You know that you're on TV now. Well, yeah, but also I spent three years ballooning on TV, and it was partially because of unhealthy habits and stress and probably being bullied. His doctor said, has your heart been bullied? I believe it's more like your candy cabinet But in any case Fast food Fast food That's

Yeah the getting out of games at midnight And going oh shoot I haven't had dinner Just like can you Let's all close our eyes Just like give your order What you do at like 1 a.m. Wherever you are

Just like say it to the restaurant We're all Double large fries Large Coke Zero This was a good bit Why are we closing our eyes for this? I just want to visualize Jeremy At like 1 a.m. after a heat game

Just like a sad Yeah I've got I've got sleeves rolled up from the button down shirt the tie a little bit loose driving through the drive-through of which I'm certainly the only person dressed that way at 12.30 in the morning. I'm going to give you a word of advice if you're going to be

in the baseball world and this just comes from experience. You cannot give in to eating after games like that. No, I don't now. I don't because of my health. It became a problem and so now I'm trying to be healthy and I get the added benefit of the vein side. The problem was as you said

that you don't like to eat before a broadcast. Like, you don't want to be full. So it's like if you don't eat before, you're starving after. Yeah, I just decided to power through that. It's really because you don't want to make duty during the game. That is part of it. He also got caught on during a heat game. Oh, my God, it was the worst.

Well, you shouldn't eat when you're on TV. However, I will tell you that the baseball time clock is if you're going on the air at 6 p.m. For a 7 o'clock game, generally about 442, you put a bite in. You eat a little bit, and then you power through, but you eat a good breakfast. Yeah, that's basically what I've been doing at this point is like either an early lunch or a late breakfast. I'm sure the audience is really intrigued by the timing of when I'm eating my food now.

I just want you to know that you look great. Thank you. And you're doing that. And I'm sorry that you come in here and all of a sudden you're having a bad day. Oh, I'm having a great day. You guys just told me that I looked great. I didn't bring fish today.

A little turkey sandwich. Okay, I need to get back to smelling salts because I don't understand why we don't have them. Avoiding salt on my food as well. We have everything. We have costumes. We have love. We've got all of these little games and gimmicks.

We have Adnan speaking incorrect grammar, a myriad of. We don't have smelling salts. And the reason I'm obsessed with it is that the NFL went backwards, all the show yesterday. And the problem is when we do shows, they stay forever. But when you do a show saying smelling salts are banned. And it turns out they're not banned. One day later. I'll be honest.

I thought they were banned. Like, I thought smelling salts had been gone, except for hockey. I thought they've been gone for a while. If I understood this story correctly, I believe this is George Kittles' fault. So I think George Kittle decided to break the news that smelling salts were banned. And then the NFL, PA, or the NFL or someone came out and clarified this. They're not banned. You just have to bring your own smelling salts moving forward.

Like, David, that's a liability issue is what they are doing. It's what we did with tobacco in baseball. And it's total horse hockey because we did give players tobacco. We just couldn't do it overtly. We just would hide the cans in a different place. So there's no reason to believe these NFL teams are not still going to have smelling salts available. We can't get them ourselves. We've been efforting all morning.

How do you think the players are going to do it? In Plantation? Well, it's one of those things where you can do it. It's pretty easy on Amazon. We're trying to get it this morning, and our local CVS didn't have it, so we're efforting. I'm just saying that the players will not be bringing their own smelling salts to games. Have you ever tried smelling salts? I've never.

I'm too scared. There's a whole lot of stuff I haven't tried. And I don't mean like skydiving. I like skydiving, but I'm talking about, like, smelling salts or drugs of most kinds. I did it a few weeks ago, my dad's podcast randomly. It came up before this was even a story. My dad brought it up. Randomly, like you're in the middle of conversation?

I came up on one episode on the podcast, and we were like, let's order it. And the next week, we did it. And it was terrible. I hated it. Yeah, bad. Did it cause you to have a... I'm not even sure. I got the full experience because I hated it so much, but I got, like, a few whiffs,

and it just, like, it stayed with me for, like, an hour. It was terrible. I hated it. Have you guys seen those, I think they're called boomsticks that they sell? I considered buying them. Yeah. How does that work? And what's the difference between, like, smelling salts and that?

Because that, like, I think it was, like, introduced to most people on, like, shark tank or, like, shark tank clips that go out there. And now they sell them, like, at the airport. It's basically, like, a nasal, like, it looks like a chapstick that you stick up your nose and you just take, like, a whiff and it clears you all the way up. I had those back in the old studio. And? It worked. Yeah? I liked having them in my car.

If it was a late night and I would get a little drowsy at the wheel. I'm like, oh, I'm a little tired. What does it do? Yeah, it worked what? It's kind of like a little slap in the face. But like it clears up, like if you're sick, it clears you up or it gives you like an energy shot? I don't know what they do. I just see it and I see like Robert Hirsch, whatever, his name is go, whew!

He has like a crazy face. I'm like, if you were doing a coke right now. What? Like they put a little vivapaloo on your chest. It's kind of like, I'm sorry. Gentlemen, are you not describing aphrine? I don't know what it is. That's what I'm asking.

know what it is. I don't know. It's a boom stick. I don't know what it's called. I just like what it does. This can't be happening to me. I'm not allowing this as. If you don't pack me up here, we're in a fight. If you're telling me you don't know what aphron is, it can't be. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You stick it up your nose and it does stuff. It's one of those things you do it.

You don't let your kids do it. It can ruin your nasal wall. Once you start doing it, it clears you up, but then you'll need it worse the next day. It's one of those things. It's like the chiropractor. I never been. Once you go, you've got to keep going back. It says simple ingredients, essential oils, and menthol inhaler. That's the a a a sphren or that's the boonstick?

No, that's boom-sick. You definitely smell the menthol. I want to go back to me looking great for a second. I think that even when I was weighing a little bit more, I looked great because it's most important that what's going on in the inside. Oh, back to you guys. No, no, no, no, because it's really important because I don't want anybody in our audience to feel like if they've gained a little bit of weight in recent times that they shouldn't still feel good about themselves.

No, you should still feel great about yourself regardless of what you should still feel great about yourself regardless of what your weight is so long as your health is intact because I don't want us or anybody else I understand there's a shame of his vanity I don't think I don't think that that should be where we are because it's really impacted my mental health and I don't want it to impact anybody else's I put too much weight into my literal weight and I don't want anyone else to do that so yeah I look beautiful but I would have looked beautiful if I was you know a lot a lot heavier we get it yeah not making fun of fat you got it searchlight pictures presents the roses only in theaters August 29th, from the director of Meet the Parents and the writer of Poor Things

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I'm basically Scott Hatterberg. A lot of walks, but I'm on base. When it comes to sex, I'm Scott Hattberg. Other dudes, they can be Giambi. You know your role you play well? I know my role. This is the Don Levitar show with the Stugats. It has menthol, eucalyptus oil, and peppermint oil in it.

Oh, man. I don't think that seems helpful. to me. I prefer not to do smelling salts, boomsticks. There was a story I heard when you guys did your pirate ship when you didn't invite me. Story of having people do smelling salts or something. I can't remember

what it was, but I don't want to be a part of that. While I'm in the chair, if you want to do it tomorrow, and bring in smelling salts to your heart's content. I would try it. Yeah, I would try it. I think that you could end up like Lloyd Bridges. I don't know what that is. Airplane?

Thank you, Roy. Oh, with the hair. Okay. Lloyd Bridges, he sniffed, I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue. The ones that I had, it, like, affected the whole room. Like, if Zaz did it, you would feel it too. Smelling salts? Some secondhand smellings. Maybe I did it poorly. I, like, opened up the container, and it just, like, if my wife walked into the room, like,

an hour later, and she's like, what? I'm like, sorry, I did. I love the idea of leagues covering up their players concussions. I love when boxers do it between rounds. I love when NFL players do it. I love when you get knocked to the ground, you do a little smelling salt, and you come up and boom, you're good to go. I'm fairly certain it is banned in boxing, smelling salts.

I don't think boxing allows it. But I was wrong, apparently, with the other sports. Like, it's been legal. I thought Mike Tyson used to do it all the time. Oh, but, I mean, it got banned eventually. Like, yeah, I'm sure he did do it at one point, but boxing does not allow it. I think that's a mistake.

I think sports are worse off for not allowing. I think steroids, smelling salts. Let everyone do everything. What's the actual difference? I mean, I'm not going to do everything. They stopped a sport that was going to happen. Did you guys read about this? I mean, this would be, I want a billy to actually do this

where you participate in the Olympic events on steroids. It's called the steroid games. Okay, hold on. Let's just rewind. You want me to take steroids and do the Olympic games. Because you're an athlete. You say that you can kick field goals. You can hit fast balls.

You can catch fly balls. You can tackle players. You've told me you can do all these things. No, no, no, no, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I can kick a field goal. I can hit off a baseball player. This side of the room can do all of those things. I'm very aware of my very precipitous decline in athleticism and really just health in general.

I mean, Jeremy on the other end, we were bookheading, bookheading these two great athletes here as like two chubbos. But now Jeremy's gotten in shape and I look like shit still. So like I'm on an island over here. I can't do anything. I can barely tie my shoes. Well, if you took steroids. I have thought about that. You'd be able to do everything.

Where do you think you would get them if you thought about where you would acquire the steroids? There's a gym I used to go to that I'm pretty sure a lot of people were doing steroids because it was like this little mom and pop gym. And they had like a whole room was just like mirror walled. And this was like, you know, I was like fresh out of high school at the time when I was going there. Honestly, the best gym I ever went to these boutique gyms, the LA Fitnesses of the world where it's all just pitch posh and let me be vain. This is like real. Like you're on there meat and potatoes type gym. and then like people would just go disappear behind this mirror wall and I was like what

the hell's going on like what's air conditioning back there like what's happening and then like because I was young and naive and I quickly realized go they're probably just all shooting up steroids because they go in there like two at a time and then come back out a couple minutes later and I was like all right well let's say let's say that's accurate what you're saying what would you do oh I couldn't get steroids like would you walk up to them and you're saying you got them no I couldn't if I wanted to like we've we've gone over a number of times like my bar I thought that I was a police officer. I don't give off, like, I can go obtain illegal things easily.

I'm not, I don't, I don't look like someone that people could trust with e-legalities. Well, what if right before you asked them if they got them roids, what if right before that, like, you know, you snort a line? They're like, oh, this guy, I mean, he's, they're not doing that at the gym. Well, there's a mirror wall, I'm telling you. They're not doing, how do you do cocaine on a wall? You know, you go behind the mirror wall. And then there's another world back there. Come back up.

Yeah, come on, man. Billy doesn't give off drugs. We used to have to walk from the Clevelander to, like, the 7th Street garage, like three blocks. I would daily get offered drugs on the walk just because of my look. Daily. No one offered to sell me drugs ever. It was so insulting. I would get the weed, Coke.

As like, as I'm walking by someone, like every day. And I would tell them, Billy's like, I never get that. It was so insulting. Like, no one thinks I could be addicted to drugs. I don't, like, come on. Look at me. Jeremy, you got it? That happened to me all the time.

Were the choices only wheat and coke? Mike, would you get it? That was what I heard, yeah. No, I never got offered. Wow, Roy? Yes. I've never been offered any of that stuff except the one time that I was at a bachelor party in Costa Rica.

I'm not sure you got offered a lot. That doesn't count. Good golly. Come on. So what I've heard. Your generation ruined that for ours. We can't go to Costa Rica, can't go to Colombia. If you say, oh, there's a bachelor party in Colombia or Costa Rica, you'll get,

hell no, I know what it happens. I have some friends that do scary things there. I've never gone. You can kill a guy. Wait, hold on. What does that mean? Do scary things. I'll tell you all fair.

If you want to kill a guy, you can kill a guy. I didn't do that. It's like hustle. But I will say, it's very overwhelming. It may be the only time that I was happily in a pool with other people. Wait, what? Normally, I'm not happy, but in a Costa Rican bachelor party at a pool, there's just a lot going on. And so you're in the pool, and I got past all of my germish.

Why is Andy Slater always in Columbia? I'm not answering that. I bet you could ask him yourself, but I believe that, why, hey, if you got him, you have him smoke them. Did you play the pee-p-game in the pool? No. Did they pee in the pool? Whoa. What other games?

Come on, man. Just tell us. It's fine. No, it's Costa Rica. Anything goes. Where you can be a 65-inch Jewish-looking middle-aged guy, and there are people saying, wow, you're super attractive and would you like drugs? It's always weird when you say you're height and inches.

Jews are attractive. I can't figure that out. Don't say 65 inches. That's how tall I am. Just say whatever you are. 12 inches in a foot. Yeah, 12 times 2 is 24. I believe in you.

5.5? Yeah. I know you think it sounds better. It doesn't. I think 65 inches sounds taller than 5.5. 65 inches sounds like you might be in a 6 foot range. You start tricking people. You're just hoping.

Someone thinks you're saying 6.5. No, it's like when they measure babies in months. How many months old are you? My child is 26 months. Don't get me started on the weeks. Yeah. Babies and weeks, I just, I check out. My child is 161 weeks.

I hate that. I mean, it's absurd. If you say 53 weeks, like, your baby's almost one. If you're 53 weeks, you're over one. You're over one, yeah, but that's close. You're over three. This is why you say years. This is why you go years.

This is why you embarrass yourself in front of gentlemen. Conan yesterday. God, that one sat with it. What a great, he texted me about it. He said, was Cody doing show? I don't think he knows my name. Now I know you're lying. No, he knows exactly. Did he have a good time? It didn't seem like it. He loved it. He seemed not. He's hard to read. Yeah. He's just very, that's how he played. Except when he, his frustration would come out, he'd bend his helmet, the ears until they'd snap. Yeah. But he wouldn't, you know, he was very, He's intense He didn't like my joke

where I was like Josh Beckett We should have saved him For Game 7 He also didn't like me saying Hey that great NLCS game That you had You had a pretty bad game

Prior to the game winning game That was an interesting tack That was a bad That was actually what your plan O for one with a Grounded to a double play It's a story of perseverance I think what you said was

You had a really terrible game He did say that Runs were at a premium All right He got the game winning Hit Right But he also grounded into a double play

And got picked off at second That's pretty bad I don't know if this would shock you, but there are people who come to your atmosphere and don't actually enjoy it. I was paying him a compliment and also doing a show. Also, I had heard that he was in the area of Adrian Peterson when he came into handshakes. So when he showed up in those jeans, with a tucked in polo and jeans, I'm like, this guy's going to try to rip my hand off. I got to give him the business. I dominated that handshake.

Yeah. I'm surprised he didn't just give you knuckles. It was underwhelming. It was underwhelming the handshake. Just because I thought it was gonna be amazing.