The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Just Add Water With Katie Ledecky

Episode Date: July 30, 2025

"Go to Kazakhstan. Six months. Come back. Machine." Zaslow tells us his Top 5 Favorite Things in Baseball. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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O'Henry, O'Henry. Welcome to the Big Sewy, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBattard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not gonna apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants,

just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it. And now here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face and the habitual liar. This episode is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

So, Zazz, you were watching baseball yesterday. You took a break from Boardwalk Empire. Yep. How deep into Boardwalk Empire are you? I think when I get home today, I'm gonna be watching the season finale of season one. How are you gonna catch up on all this TV that you're starting this week?

Cause you're like, I'm home alone, I can do whatever I want. I'm gonna watch this show, I'm gonna watch that show. But your family comes back in a couple days, you're not gonna be able to. You know, there might be a practice that you need to try out, Billy. I don't know what goes on in your home,

but I'm master my demand. Oh. And so, when I wanna do something, Are you? Even when the family is home, I do it. Now that doesn't mean that there aren't still some struggles. Like I told you, dinner is a nightly battle in the Zaslow Mansion.

But when it comes to what I want to watch, we have more than one television in my house. So there you go. It's different when you have teenagers, I guess. Because I have a five-year-old daughter, and I ain't winning that. I got teenagers, and I easily kick them out of the room. We actually have rules in my house.

My son, my son challenged me a couple of months ago. Holy shit. Yeah, my older one is 16, all right? And either one of them. This is the runaway? Either one of them. Good card though. You know what, he's not running away.

He's not going to Chicago next month. Really? Come on, Zazz. Cause you're master of your domain? No, he is. A lot of Arab fighters on that card. He loves the Arab fighters. Ha ha ha ha. So. Why'd you look at me? No, he is a lot of Arab fighters on he loves the Arab fighters

So So he he is he has postponed the trip with his friends because yeah They've run into an issue where they're not gonna be able to get a hotel without a doll like my son thinks that he could just Walk outside the hotel and he's gonna give like like a bum ten dollars as if it's outside the gas station Hey, can you buy me beer? Can you check us in? Yeah, that's what he thinks is gonna happen. He's gonna give some guy ten bucks, hey check us in to the hotel. I'm like, ain't gonna work playa.

So they postponed the trip, they're now planning on going to the garden in November. Big one. That's what he tells me. Big card. With whom? How's it gonna be different? Same issue, same issue, okay? but that's on him to figure out Maybe he has more time to figure it out as opposed to just a few weeks because August is here

Maybe you have a friend who's 18. I don't know maybe Uncle Tony He's just gonna make a 21 year old friend, and then you're gonna be like okay now You're good. You only have to be 21 to check in all the time probably Oh, but probably 18 and and a credit card you know? But anyway, so where was I? You were? Your son challenged you a couple months ago? Oh yes, that's right, we have a thing in the Zaslow Mansion that if you wanna be man of the house, step up, man.

You could try and take the- Feats of strength? You could try and take the reins. Frank. All right? You wanna challenge, you can challenge. And my son for the first time decided, all right, I want to challenge you can challenge and my son for the first time decided. All right I'm gonna challenge and it was a sneak attack too like it was like hey We're gonna we're gonna fight tonight the challenge was you get ownership of what we watch on the television No, just means you're in charge of the house charge of the entire house your man of the house bills and everything

Yeah, well no no, but you're in charge make Just to make decisions. You're a man of the house. Like the Black Panther ceremony? You know what? Really similar to Black Panther. Anybody want to step up and challenge? I'm king of this house. You want to step up, step up, all right? And my son, it was a sneak attack, too. He came up on me.

So it's a physical challenge. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah, take down. You can take me down. That's it. Like, in one, two, three, or just on the floor? Take me down on the ground. Yeah. You got to tap out? Essentially, yeah, but down. You can take me down, that's it. Like, can one, two, three, or just on the floor. Take me down on the ground, yeah. You gotta tap out?

Essentially, yeah, but it hasn't happened yet, so we'll see. Are outsiders welcome? Like, if I wanted your house, could I just show up at your house and take you down? No, no, you're not, you don't then, you don't then become in charge of my family. You'd have to kill him.

So it's not like Black Panther. Well, I mean, it's someone who, in Black Panther, they felt they had a right to the throne. Yeah, Black Panther, he had to have that birthright. Some kind of lineage. It couldn't just be any, Captain America couldn't show up and just fight. Right, right, right.

White Panther. Excellent point, I mean. So my son, sneak attack style, my older one, he's 16, he decided to challenge. Let's just say it didn't go well for him. All right, and as a result, he could try again in six months. That's the rule.

Oh, those are the rules. You have six months. Yeah, it's like I get home today, you might try, no, no. You could try again in six months. So you took that ass? Took that ass, man. So he thinks he's gonna try again in six months,

and at this point, it's like three more months from now. But yeah, in six months, you could try again. So he was behind you and you kind of threw him over? He came up from behind me, put his arms around, I'm like, oh, okay, actually I think he put his arms around my neck. I'm like, oh, he tried, he went for the jugular, all right. Thinks he's one of the Arab fighters.

He loves the Arab fighters. And he wants to go live in Kazakhstan for six months. He says, I go to Kazakhstan. Through three years, forget. He says, Kazakhstan, six months, comeback machine. Yes, he's right, dude this what's his kids name? My brother below Gordy Cory Cory dude corks Go to Kazakhstan six months come back machine so I don't know man if he can't take you down

I think he needs more than six months, so yeah He could try in six months he could try again And if he takes you down then do you have to wait six months that he gets as man of the house So you could attack him whenever you want great question. I've not thought that can they team up your two boys No, no, no, no, no, no, and is the school understanding with these how they get the bruises or Like it wasn't hard for me. All right It needs to be any bruising going on there. So yeah, that's what's going on. So you can take down 16 year olds.

What's his stature? What are we looking at, 16, what is he? He's about an inch and a half taller than me at this point. Really? He's about six foot. Yeah, he's probably. He must be really frustrated at this point. Yeah, he's probably like five, nine and a half right now.

Yeah, and he's athletic, he's got a good build, I mean he goes to the gym. Since we're sharing names, can I ask you a question? Yeah. I know her name. I gym. Since we're sharing names, can I ask you a question? Yeah. I know her name. I've dealt with your wife a lot, I've done speaking engagements at her school. If you're okay, sharing her first name.

Yeah, her name's Tamara. Can we put this on the poll? Are there a lot of white Tamaras out there? Because there was a time when Zazz first told me he was married and he told me his wife's name, I was like, oh, Zazz, how about that? How about that?

And then I met Tamara and I was like, oh no, okay. Like a college basketball coach. Tamara. Every Tamara that I grew up with was not white. But I think a lot of them are Tamara. Okay. And she's Tamara. Yeah, so I got it with the way they described it

or whatever. Is there a sister named Tia? No. No. Tia, actually. Mara okay, and she's Tamara. Yeah, so it's I got it No, no, no, I actually Ty and Tamara so yeah But then I learned not so much and then like I learned more about Zazz's like childhood heroes like Hulk Hogan and Ryan Sandberg He's got a type that one What was your favorite NBA player grown up? What was your favorite NBA player? Growing up? Uncle and Rice. Uncle and Rice.

That's my dog. Which favorite kind of rice? What's my favorite? Kind of rice. White rice? Baspati. I have fried rice. I told you I ordered Thai last night, dog.

Chinese. Fried rice. So Izzy, you were on Instagram and you saw this video of Luka Doncic. Yes, man. It was just actually on the screen at the top of us too here. And he was at a pickup game somewhere in New York, right? I believeic. Yes, man. It was just actually on the screen, at the top of us too here, and he was at a pick-up game somewhere in New York, right?

I believe in New York, yeah. Was he at Rutgerat? He was at Dyckman. Oh yeah, at the Dyckman, there you go. And he's just sitting there, and somebody with a camera gives him a ball, and he's pretty far away from the screen. We'll throw it up here as I'm talking about it,

but he's far away. Look at how far he is, and he just casually doesn't get up, doesn't move a leg muscle, casually two hand, switches that thing, and I'm like, does anybody know how difficult a shot that is? But then to get it on first, I'm assuming first try, right? Maybe it was third try at the most,

absolutely insane level of skill. He and Steph Curry are the two people who I would assume are aliens. So, this is the part that I think sometimes escapes people. Do we know that's First Try by the way? We don't, but let's just assume it is for the sake of this argument. These guys all day long, all they're doing is play basketball. Like it's like however much basketball you play, I guarantee you it is a fraction of what an NBA player does. Like, I'm talking to the proverbial person,

like, I love basketball, I'll hoop every day, whatever. That's also why I always get so upset at like, load management. These dudes spend their entire summer playing like triple header basketball games. It's crazy. But how many of those games- They show up to Drew League,

they play so much harder than a regular NBA game. But he's sitting down. How many of these games is he sitting down and taking 40 footers? That's insane. So to that point, when they're not actively playing, they sit down, like in between breaks and stuff, they're sitting down and I swear to God, three for a dollar, here we go. How much did you hit me? And by the way, when I was with the Suns, our director of team security would do this.

And his big hustle was we have rookies that come in or new guys like, hey man, I bet you I can make this shot right here, and they're like, you're not gonna make it. And then he'd miss on purpose, and then he'd say, double or nothing, and then say you're on, and then he'd drain it. And they're like, oh, and then we're like, another one fell for KT's tricks, man.

You could probably speak to this better than me, but I love the story one time where, you know, as far as these guys, like they're NBA players, they're professional basketball players, you don't understand how good they are. And I remember the story one time, it was a Washington Wizards practice, and Gilbert Arenas and Deshaun Stevenson

were doing a three point shootout after practice. And mind you, Deshaun Stevenson, doing a three-point shootout after practice. And mind you, Deshaun Stevenson, not really a good three-point shooter, okay? So to make things even, Gilbert Arenas was going to shoot the threes one-handed lefty. Alright? And Arenas still won the three-point shootout by making like 79 out of 100 lefty. Non-shooters hit about that many out of 100. Non-shooters in the NBA, if you do a drill, now granted it would be right handed,

but left handed give it to the Reaners? So I'll give you a great example. Jason Richardson in practice would shoot left handed threes. Just for fun, not even for any practical purpose. He just had time and he was bored and he started doing it. Rashid Wallace, I've seen Rashid Wallace take two basketballs and shoot them at the same time from three and make it, both.

Didn't Clayton have to do this? Like he could time it out properly and have one go in before the other? It would be whoom, whoom, and it'd go whoop, and one of them would have a higher arc too. I think the left one had a higher arc. So it's like, what I mean to say is, it's not just that they play,

oh, these guys professionally play basketball. What you mean to say is NBA players good at basketball. Pretty good, pretty good. It's not even that, it's like even what I mean to say is like, it's not just that they play, oh these guys professionally play basketball all the time. What you mean to say is NBA players good at basketball. Pretty good, pretty good. It's not even that. It's like, even in their downtime, they're doing basketball shit. So for him to do that, honestly, it didn't even register to me like,

oh, how cool was that? To me, it's insane. Just like, you had the Klay Thompson video, him hitting 72 straight three-pointers, and then he just one-ups himself by, I don't forget the number, it's double figures hitting such and such straight left-handed consecutive left-handed three pointers, it's absolutely Sam Bennett said yesterday that he hasn't skated since the last game

That a boy. I mean that you don't forget how to do the other thing too Is he is like those guys are so strong and we think of it as us right like shooting it from 40 feet away Lucas six seven two hundred and thirty five forty pounds like strong guys it's just like flick okay here how much of your shots as you were a point guard and then be right varsity shooting guard but yeah even better even better so you know how much of that shot is in your legs now take out your legs all together and go 40 feet over there and don't even get the backboard yeah as an option like it's effing insane straight course one try

Straight that we know you're assuming. It's one yeah, but I've seen it on one try before look if that one was viral Decontextualization works both ways like there's no chance that you sat there and gave him 12 tries in the crowd. That's also true Dyckman they're like The day libertar show with Stu Gotz is sponsored by Liquid IV. All right, so I'm trying to soak up the last little bits of summer while raising a six-month-old baby. Let me tell you, being a dad to a baby that loves waking up around 3 o'clock in the morning every single day is exhausting. And I find myself in the middle of the night, parched like... But I found the trick.

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I saw a post on Twitter yesterday how the Toronto Maple Leafs, that they won the division. Guess what? It's been two years and that's two years too long Stugats. You can take that ass too. Oh, we're taking two asses. This is the Don LeBattar show with the Stugats Zazz like I said, I'm sorry I interrupted you earlier because we went off on a tangent, but you took a break from watching Boardwalk Empire to turn on some baseball. Yeah, yeah.

Okay, so I was watching a little bit of the Marlins last night. They won 5-0, okay. Maybe Alcantara's last start as a Marlin, I don't know, we'll see. We can get to that if you want. I'd like to hear what Billy has to say about that. But anyway, it got me thinking, I saw something in Major League Baseball last night, which got me thinking, I have a top five, guys. Oh, whoa.

Get the set, wait, hold on, we gotta get the bells and whistles ready. That comes after he says, number five. Make sure you got it, I'm giving you. I have a top five, my, my favorite things in baseball. All right, y'all ready? This is in general, not just this season, like news items. Like things that could happen in major league baseball.

These are my top five favorite things, just my absolute favorite thing happened last night. So it got me thinking. Number five, when there's a pickle between home and third. It literally just said back here, a pickle better be somewhere on the third. My movie there sells pickles. Yeah?

How much? $2.99. Wow. It's a hell of a deal. Thanks. I love a good pickle because I love when it gets all the position players out of their position. They all have to cover for each other.

You got the left fielder running in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then if they screw up their rotation, it's like, oh, nobody's covering home. Oh, he's heading for home. I love that. I love a good pickle. How often does that happen?

You know what, defensively in baseball, a pickle, you're supposed to have one throw. Like if you're throwing the ball back and forth, you're doing that poorly defensively. Yeah, that's bad. That's poorly. Really? So the idea is you're supposed to run the guy back

until you throw it and then attack. Why is one in a pickle? Is it because the pickles are really tight in the jar usually? That's a good guess. Let me look it up. All right. Wouldn't you then be in a jar, not in a pickle? You would be a pickle.

I'm a pickle. Dan's on vacation. I'm pickle rigged. What's number four? Number four, when a player hits his first ever home run and then he comes into the dugout and everyone ignores him. The silent treatment. Classic silent treatment. Love that. They did that to, what's our gator? Keglione?

Keglione? Jock Keglione? Nailed it. You're on your own on that one Israel. On his kegleone. That's right, you went to Santa Fe. How dare you. I love when they ignore him, he doesn't know what's going on. He doesn't know what to do. And then I was like, ah, we're just joking with you. And then they all get super excited. All right. Number three, when something weird happens in the game, one team is upset about it.

The manager comes out to confront the umpire and the manager says, we are protesting the remainder of this game, and then the umpire turns to the stat keeper up in the press box, and he sign languages the P. He signs the P. I love that. It's very archaic. I hope they never get rid of it.

I love that. Izzy, you had a very good guess as being in a tight jar But it dates back to the pickling process, which is sour and messy back in the day Shakespeare was the first person to refer to it And it's just being in what brines your pickle. You sit and brine I find myself in a pit of a pickle I'm a pickle I'm a bit of a pickle. I'm a pickle.

Number two, when there's a fight, when there's about to be a fight in a major league game, maybe the hitter, he charges the pitcher, or at least they're being held back, and it's gonna be a whole thing. The bench is obviously clear, but the relief pitchers. The jog in.

In the bullpen. When they're running in from the outfield I love that that is my second favorite thing in all baseball I just imagine they're all sitting there it's like the third inning they don't the warm-up or anything yet and they're just watching the game they're relaxing they're chewing their tobacco whatever I hope you don't get cancer in your lip and then all of a sudden anywhere else this fight breaks out and just let's go I love they open up the door and they all run out.

I love it. There's like four that are into it and then you see the one guy who's like, ah, I gotta go, they're going. You better get to running! And I love that. That was number two? Yeah.

Can we guess, can we get some guesses on what number one is? Cause he said it's his favorite thing that everybody bought and happened last night. And it happened last night. And it happened last night. But I have a guess. It's definitely not my number one. My number one is when they're showing the dugout

and somebody has bubble gum and they blow a bubble and they put it on top of the head next to him and he's gotta wait the entire game to figure out if he's got bubble gum on his head. You make a top five. Okay. This is my top five. Number one, it happened last night.

The Baltimore Orioles have a pitcher named Sir Anthony, I think his last name is Dominguez? Does that sound right? Sir Anthony Dominguez, alright. And he's a pitcher for the Orioles. They had a double header yesterday. They were hosting the Toronto Blue Jays. And in the middle of the double header, between games one and two, the Orioles traded sir Anthony to the Blue Jays. Traded into the team they were playing. Your absolute favorite thing in baseball is when teams have a double header and they trade a player from one team to the other in that double header.

No not necessarily a double header that's super rare we saw you say but when teams are playing each other and you get traded from one dugout to the one clubhouse to the next clubhouse That is my favorite thing in all that a walk of shame Well, he had to do the walk of shame yesterday in the middle of the games you see him walking You know the bowels of the stadium. He's walking to the new Clubhouse there and the road one by the way because he was in like a nice fancy clubhouse involved well now he's got to go to the city one in Toronto and because he was in like a nice fancy club house in balls. Now he's got to go to this shitty one in Toronto and

He's walking past his old teammates as they're getting set for the second game. He's waving in the dugout. Hey guys and He was called on to pitch in that zone Yes, wow crazy. It's my favorite thing in all of baseball when you get traded the team you're playing again I thinklins did that with Billy Koch once, where they got him from the White Sox while they were playing the White Sox. I love it, that's how I pronounced his name. I love that. A Koch. Yeah, it was K-O-C-H, right?

I think so. Still is. There you go. Some people do. It's a good list, right? Great list. It is, I'll have another one for the next hour. My top five favorite things of baseball. You already got a little teaser on an OLI. I don't have a whole list, but there's one thing

I love about baseball more than anything. I love that they are on the forefront of cheating. It's the cheatingest ass sport in the world. These MFers have found a way to cheat every single, man, think about all the ways they cheat. Everyone's like, oh, like, PED's like, PED's yawn. All right, well, what about, hey, we're gonna hack the database of our opponent

and steal all the scouting reports. That happened in baseball. That was the Cardinals, right? Yeah, hey, you know what we're gonna do? We're gonna bang a trash can and that's gonna let us know, hey, I'll wear an Apple watch. You know what, why wear an Apple watch? I'm gonna wear a wire.

Don't, don't. A literal wire. A wire, like I'm on the informant. Dog, there's no other sport that is cheated like this. Everyone else is like, oh, we're spinning our blood in the centrifuge Oh, who cares man? These guys are doing it at the highest level and they always one up and I'm like man baseball is a cheatin ass sport But I kind of like I got all kinds of fake substances on their body I got little files on their body somewhere.

The hat is just slathered in Vaseline or whatever that is. It's amazing. Imagine the cheating that's going on now that we don't even have an idea of yet. And then 10 years from now, you know what they were doing, right? There was a satellite, and it was sending waves to a neural link in my brain.

How about when they cork the bat? Corking the bat? Who knew you could take equipment and mess with it and make it like better? Baseball knew, right? I still can't get the hacking one is still to me like, that's tops. Which one?

The hack, the Cardinals hacked the Astros database. And that's when the Astros were bad too. Yeah. The Astros were not good yet. This, yeah, this is before all the World Series and stuff, but it's just like the idea that like, yo, like just giving our guys on the juice isn't enough. That's boring.

I need more. Everyone's doing that. Oh, congratulations. I'm trying to think of ways that basketball players could cheat to this level. Like, could you, there's nothing really you could do, like somehow make the floor bouncier at a certain spot so that you can really rise up. Or less bouncy, you know, that's the best spot could do, like somehow make the floor bouncier at a certain spot

so that you can really rise up. Or less bouncy, you know, that's a dead spot. Like at the garden. But then it affects you both sides, right? Because you're playing on both sides. That's what I'm trying to figure out. If there's like one thing that you can do that's just for you.

Something in your shoes maybe, but not really. There's not really, like dude. Like the home court, like every time, every basket that the home team shoots at, it kind of grows a little bit each half But then again, but it shrinks back for the other half. Hmm How about a magnet on the rim and then you're shooting it on one side? I've heard that theory from my wacko friends that the magnets

I have some I have this one wacko friend who's got Conspiracy theories for every sport and he's convinced there's a magnet in the NBA rim You should have he's like the kawai. How'd that ball go in? How do you explain that? You know what? Of course he can take you should you should tell him to listen to basketball Illuminati basketball Illuminati basketball Illuminati three times keep your third eye open It's the it is the preeminent basketball podcast for people who are into conspiracy. I was gonna try to take that same Slogan for oddball and keep your second ball open, but didn't really take.

They're both open, baby. Yeah. Never restrict them. Now, Mike, as I said earlier, I'm really excited for Naked Gun. I'm really excited for it. Can I tell you, by the way, right now early Rotten Tomatoes media score?

No, no, no, they say what they say no Don't do it just because I whispered in a means ear that I got them. This is why I was leaving All right, yeah, okay 30 reviews in What they say Certified that's my gimmick for the for the naked gun. Uh-huh tomato meter reads go on 100% Talking about no way. That's what I'm talking about No way

Who are these 30 people? See, the thing is about the Naked Gun movies and that style of comedy It's a laugh a minute Hey, every line Every line is just a set up for another punchline Those movies have aged with such grace

When was the last time you saw one of them? I last saw a N gun movie last year. I Revisit this for me. It's at least 25 years. I what you haven't seen in do on an algo Palazzo you haven't seen that in 25 years How have you not I don't know I watch half of airplane about a decade ago They really airplane is go to there's so many good jokes in airplane You miss like you why every time I watch it I pick up a new one. These people need to be taken to a hospital.

A hospital, what is it? It's a big building where sick people go. But that doesn't matter right now. Airplane holds up good? Of course. All right boys, let's take some pictures. Smoking or non-smoking? Smoking please.

Tickets on fire. Excuse me, I speak Jive. Oh yeah, the Jive one. When he's all sad and he goes to the jazz club and he sits down at the table and the waiters ask him, what do you want? And Leslie Nielsen goes, give me the strongest thing you got. And then a dude that's just all Done libertard Stugats Opposing teams in the triple L. Stugats.

These are smiles, till the broads are clutch again. Clutch again, clutch again. This is the Dan LeVatar Show with the StGuardz. Hollywood is watching this one with a very curious eye because comedies, big tent pole comedies, they're not getting green lit anymore. These things are having short theater runs. We talked about this a little bit with Friendship, especially the R-rated comedy. It's a lost art form and studios have kind of forgotten

how to market these things. Is it a lost art form or is it that, like I know for me, you gotta do a lot to get me to the movie theater these days It doesn't mean that like I don't want to see that kind of movie But it's hard to get me out to the theater I think especially with comedies people are so now naturally predisposed in the streaming age to be like well This isn't going to do well in the box office and it's going to be on demand in three weeks And it usually is. And so you're in this cycle in which there really isn't

a word of mouth comedy that gets people to the theaters. Which was the last of those. Because the first one that comes to mind for me was The Hangover, but that's probably just because we just talked about it the other day. I was really hoping that a movie like Friendship would be that kind of movie, because Friendship is really hilarious

and it just, it struggled to really get that word of mouth going and it also released in a time where there's so many tentpole franchises releasing in theaters and big-time summer movies. I think comedy should maybe really try to look at like that February, that dead zone in the box office to see if they can kind of bring it back but this one is going for it. It's a summer comedy film that is trying to bring back a very specific genre and comedy that has lied dormant basically since Leslie Nielsen went away.

Well, here's the thing. The parody movies went away and then you had Don't Be a Menace to South Central and then Scary Movie and then Scary Movie had all those sequels. Scary Movie brought it back. Not Another Teen Movie and Vampire Suck and all those and they were just lazier and lazier and lazier. The thing about Airplane and Naked Gun

where the jokes, while silly, were clever. They were clever jokes, right? There was great joke writing in that. Absolutely. It wasn't just spoofing like epic movies. It's like, oh, this is not just a parody of 300. Right. They'll do some, I mean, Naked Gun was parodying.

Like Dragnet. Dragnet and cop shows. And those police procedural shows of the 50s. It was a lot of original joke writing that went into that. Cuban? No, Dutch Irish. Mother's from Wales. I mean, it just, man, it reminds me of Dumb and Dumber.

I'm like, one of the smartest jokes in Dumb and Dumber is, pull over, pull over. Actually, it's a cardigan, but thanks for noticing. Right? That's such a great joke written, but obviously, it's like a dumb topic or whatever. I just had a whole debate in my head about whether, with the more sort of recreational usage of marijuana, you would think that comedies and theaters would do better, but then I just sort of played that out, and it's like, you get high,

and then you just don't wanna leave the house. Just want something funny at home anyway. You know, I'll tell you what, man. I got a bold take for you. I think the comedies are coming back. I think this movie is going to be incredible. It's going to set all types of box office numbers from like the last decade in terms of the comedic,

the straight comedy movie, no special effects, no CGI. I think part of the reason why these things really haven't taken off at the box office is because they're just not being made. Think about just what you do at home. You're also not really watching comedies at home. If you're watching a comedy, it's something that's proven that you've loved,

that you're revisiting from 20 years ago. The new fresh comedy, very rarely something that you do. Occasionally you'll get like Ricky Stinnicky was okay. That was all right. But Happy Gilmore more recently was something. Another bold take. You know what I? Happy Gilmore 2 sucks.

Nah, that's not that bold. You know what I just thought of is, I actually saw Eddie Murphy Raw in a movie theater. I was nine years old, I shouldn't have been in there. But Eddie Murphy Raw in the movie theater. Like that, a stand up comedian. That would've been crazy. Yeah.

That would've been crazy. You know what? I got a bold take for you. I don't think it would've been as fun in the theater. I think the part of what made Raw so great, well at least for me, was you got your hands on a tape and you're not supposed to have this tape. Cause I saw it as a kid and I was like, oh my God.

So my experience was similar, but it's because my aunt and uncle, my cool aunt and uncle brought me and my older sister. So we were like watching something that we like, oh, am I supposed to listen to this? And it was pretty fun. I don't know if you guys saw what came out yesterday, the report, because you're saying that the naked gun

is gonna come and it's gonna save comedy. Yeah, it's my goal take. Happy Gilmore 2 was terrible. I don't know if you saw the report that came out yesterday, but Netflix released that it was streamed 46.7 million times. So I did some math on this and I figured, okay, 46.7 million. You know, that's not people that watch it. Some people watch it two, some people watch it three.

So I said, you know what, like, we multiply that 46.7 million by let's say like 1.5 more or less average, right? Then you get a number of people more or less that watch it. And then if you multiply that, I looked up the average ticket price is like $16.08. Isn't that crazy by the way? So you, well that's the national average.

Is it? It's like 12 bucks by my house. Well you're on the lower averages work yeah thank you Chris Wow Wow that's a bold take by you Chris crazier than Tony correcting Billy's grab so you uh you multiply that by like 16.10 let's say so 1610 for a movie ticket. I'll tell you this, by my calculations and how movie projections go, Happy Gilmore was the biggest opening ever, made $1.1 billion dollars first weekend.

That's a bold. I would say comedy's back. I kinda wanna see how long you can go with the bold puns before I jump in. I'll tell you, it's not even a pun, I just keep saying it's the boldest take because we're trying to do a thing here and all of you guys keep running over it.

Thank you Amin for that seamless transition. It's the boldest take from Boost Mobile. And of course, presented like I just said by Boost Mobile, the newest 5G network in the country. the newest 5G network in the country. Bill Joel doesn't have the pizzazz that Billy Joel does. Hi, my name is Ari. I am calling from a payphone. My hot take is that Denzel Washington is not a good actor.

All right, I'll hang up and listen. Yeah, you hang up forever. Justin from Seattle. Hockman Fantasy Football, Oh, all right. I'll hang up and listen. Yeah, you hang up forever. Justin from Seattle Walkman fantasy football they don't have often the line as a category You can pick a whole defense and special teams But you can't pick an offensive line and there's plenty of great stats that they can gain and lose points with Thank you. This is Josh Calling on a mobile from North Carolina

Who is labor at home? Who is race the friends who is race the friends who is race the friends? Who is race the friend? He had a good career, but he wasn't no shack a Better comp would be Michael Dole. Yeah He had a good career but he wasn't no Shaq. A better comp would be Michael Doleac. Who is Rafe the Friend? Who is Rafe the Friend?

Who is Rafe the Friend? Who is Rafe the Friend? Limited Fake Tim Kerchen. Dan, this week we have a walk off catchers interference for the first time since 1971. Hi, this is Dan from Green Bay. My boldest take is that take is just dessert lasagna. I'll hang up and listen. That's a good, good crop other than the one

that was awful. Bill Joel doesn't slap. No. You don't think Denzel's a bad actor? Come on, man. You're willing to hear an argument there? I'm not, there is no argument. I've heard he plays similar roles.

There is no argument. At first the Kirk-tion, I was like, this isn't good, but it got really good. Better and better, it was so good. Yeah, no, similar roles, similar roles. I like the guy. David Washington? The Ralph LaFrance guy hanging in there.

Yeah. That's a strong take. He started, and I was like, and then when he got to the lyrics, I was like, oh wait, he's onto it, and then by the second book, I'm in. Offensive line and fantasy, how would that work? I really like that idea.

How would that work? You go with like a rushing yard threshold, you go with sacks allowed, that's negative points. That is one way to boost up your running backs, I guess, if you're like running back threshold, but also negative points, right? Sacks allowed, negative plays. No.

Then you could do the combo like you do with quarterbacks and receivers. You could get offensive line running back combos, stack. So the offensive line, fantasy wise, would just be able to hurt you. They can't actually help you. It's just negative points for bad things. If you get like 200 rushing yards, you get bonus.

Similar to defenses. It's also like, well, what could have been? I'd just get like four points when this guy's got the Eagles and they're racking up 25. If you have one of those teams that runs an offensive lineman, you get the touchdown regardless of which offensive lineman it is or throws to an offensive lineman. And if a fat man touchdown?

Oh, I'll tell you what it is. You saying if someone rushes 200 yards, I say no. It's any time there's short yardage. Because that's really when the offensive line comes in, right? It's like it was goal line. Fourth and ones. Fourth and ones, yeah. How many fourths and ones you converted?

One or two, yeah. Yeah, how about that? I would never be in that league. Yeah, it's a losers league. That is ridiculous. Offensive line league? And don't even get me started on IDP. You know what IDP is?

Please, IDP, give me a break. Individual defensive players? I would never be in your league, don't ask me. Chad Greenway had 19 tackles and I lost because he had 19 tackles. Who gives a shit? I had Patrick Willis once at his peak. That's a garbage league you were in.

Everybody knows football's quarterbacks, receivers, running backs, tight ends, that's it. Everyone knows fantasy football's that. That's right. D'Amico Ryan, so what a snag. I've never played in IDP league, I'm with you there. Good for you. That's a little crazy.

Too much, just too much. IDP isn't an individual development plan. It's an HR term. I don't know. Maybe. It's a fantasy term. There's just certain words I just don't know. Like I'm never gonna know what racketeering is.

Just don't tell, I'm just never gonna know. Really? You can tell me right now, I won't remember if I'm in it from now. I think it's an Olympic sport. Racketeering? Yeah. They do that in the Olympics. Did he got a bronze?

Oh, he's got a medal. He didn't even place on Rico. Oh, that's right. Rico, man. Rico's such a cool- Rico much better. I don't want to get caught with a Rico charge, but it kind of sounds cool. If I'm gonna get a Rico- Amino has it part of this Rico. Wow. Hit him with the Rico. I'll also never know what that means, but it feels like more Hispanic people do that No, that's for mafia. That's when the police they're trying to put together a case like we could get them on a Rico Rico It's very exciting when that sound a little racist Hey Rico, you're going to jail for a long time Listen up time to think fast is this a real or fake podcast? I feel like I have a good hand this week. I don't like the lack of pageantry.

We have a new contestant. Izzy Gutierrez, what do you do for a living? I guess podcaster. Well, that makes sense with this game. First one, In the Trenches with A.Q. Shipley. Wow. This one where the title is fine, it's the player that's intriguing.

Super Bowl champion, AQ Shipley. Okay, there's more information about him than I've ever known. Would he be podcasting? Give me the headline again or the title again? In the Trenches. I'm going to say that's too easy. That's a good podcast name. I don't like that Zazzle's on the computer.

I'm going to say fake. You want to say fake podcast?. I'm gonna say that's too easy. That's a good podcast name. I don't like that Zazzle's on the computer here. I'm gonna say fake. I'm gonna say fake podcast. I'm gonna say real. In the Trenches is a great podcast name. Zazz, what are you doing? Nah, I'm looking at something completely unrelated actually. We're doing some research. Yeah, I'm learning a little bit about a Rico case.

Okay. Well, in the meantime, do you think In the Trenches with A.Q. Shipley is a real or fake podcast? I'm saying real. He's got the Wikipedia page. A.Q. Shipley was on the Pat McAfee show promoting his podcast for an hour yesterday. It is real.

Hey! I'm Israel. Yeah. Yeah, you are. Next podcast. Life is short with Justin Long. Wow. Life is short with who? Who's Justin life is short with, who's Justin Long?

He was big in the early 2000s. Yeah, big boy. Yeah, you remember him? No. Drag Me To Hell. He was an actor. He was an accepted. Oh, okay, an actor. He's in Barbarian.

Waiting, I remember him now. He's got that weird face. Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna say that's real. Life is short with Justin Long, Am mean, I'm gonna say not real I don't think Justin long has a podcast. I'm going not real. I don't think it's a podcast. It is a real podcast Is real big mouth with Lisa Rena

Is this a podcast that goes over episodes of big mouth or seasons of the show? She's a famous entertainment reporter. With a big mouth? She has a big mouth. Oh, okay. Dude, first of all, I thought of the show Big Mouth. Then you said Lisa Rinna and I thought Lisa Ann. And I was like, oh.

She also has a big mouth. I know. I'm gonna say fake. I go fake. I'm gonna say we'll fake. I don't think she's self-aware, like, self-competent enough to make fun of something that people make fun of her. I'm gonna go fake, because I don't know that fool so I gotta go fake.

You don't know Lisa Renner? Nah. It is a fake podcast. From the point... Wait, wait, wait. I missed that because Chris was talking in my ear at that very moment at the reveal. What was it? Real or fake? It was a fake podcast.

Okay. Woohoo! Sorry, I couldn't celebrate properly, Chris. I got it. Just keep going. Not your fault. We're good. From the point with Trey Young. Real or fake podcast?

Oh, I have a little insight on this one. Now you're full. We're good from the point with Trey young real or fake Have a little insight on this one I know that he was trying to get a podcast my heart a couple other people know and so I Think this one's real. I think it's fake because I heard the same thing because he's let the league in assists It's a good time from the point points a big star. You know I'm going Walmart. I Don't know what that means. Walgreens. Oh, we're not playing? Walgreens.

Walgreens. That's a terrible job at a B. It was. Terrible. So just answer the question. Cause that joke would have been funny, right? It might have been. It's funnier than Walmart where I'll just be like,

man, I was wondering why I get no reaction. Do I have to explain what we did on the show yesterday Kmart? Very embarrassed right now. It's a look away That's a real podcast Finally just add water with Katie Ledecky Wow, what a great name. You know, I shit on the puns, but that's a good one. That's a great one. It's too great. Katie Ledecky doesn't have that kind of face.

I'm going to say fake. I've never heard her speak. Yeah, I'm going fake. It is a fake. That's a good one. Katie, hit me up. Hit that one. We'll do a pod.