The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Whale Watching

Episode Date: July 26, 2023

Pablo and Amin discuss contracts in the NBA and how Jaylen Brown is getting the $304M supermax deal. Jess was near a shark attack and there was a pod of orcas in Key Largo - what is happening right now. Plus, is the cure to male loneliness the immaculate grid and a big matchup for the USWNT vs the Netherlands. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to Giraffe King's Network. Welcome to the big suite! Presented by Giraffe King. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Levitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables

to grab somebody's fries that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys. I've done it. And now, here's the marching band to nowhere, that face and the habitual liar. Headline, New York Times. Is it cure to male loneliness sharing immaculate grid scores and remembering some guys like Bip Roberts with the fellas?

Bip Roberts. Yes, yes, so far. All I want to talk about is messy and immaculate grid. We're in the summer, folks. The pre-show morning meetings are in New York Times trendpiece. We're in the summer and the women's world cup matches started 3 a.m. I'm struggling here. By the way, huge match up tonight for the U S women's national team up against another

one's a very difficult test. And we'll find out if we can sleep in again for the match against Portugal tonight with this nine PM Eastern very friendly start nine PM Eastern tonight and three a.m. against Portugal. Correct. This is the... Yeah, it's been a, it's been a really interesting tournament in that if you follow women's international competition every four years, like most, even I would say most soccer fans, they will pay attention to women's soccer, not in domestic leagues, maybe the occasional Champions League

finals, not super readily accessible. If you're following this competition and you're just borrowing your knowledge from what you've seen previously, you're a little confused by this because the world has gotten better. And this is an argument for pumping resources into the game and expanding your network as we talked about the Filipinas and them just deciding we're going to go after meaning there. I mean, has a take on this. We're gonna drag a mean in here later. So we can go to geopolitical war over this. But yes, exactly.

No, there is a, there's this larger trend, right? Like, oh, wait, women's sports actually has fan bases that can support these things. And actually, if they're only given a little bit more of it, a little bit more budget, some more attention. Like this is a real viable business in a world where everything is decentralized and all you need is to support a thing with a fan base. And this clearly has it.

The US has had so many injuries to their team and as the rest of the tournament plays out, I see all these other nations get better that I'm wondering if there's a recalibration in the sport and I don't really know what to expect tonight against the Netherlands because the women's national team spread against Vietnam was six and a half. And they grind it out a three-nil victory and is that a rising tide for Vietnam? Is that the US getting worse?

This is a result that whatever happens tonight, that you can probably project forward and get a better understanding of it because I'm struggling. Ireland went up one zero on an Olympic goal against Canada and Canada. It looked like Canada was done in Ducin and they've battled back, but it's been a very interesting tournament in terms of people that like myself, that thought they had a grasp on the sport and I've been surprised by a lot of them. Well, I think it's definitely time to expand it. Like there is much more parity now than maybe eight years ago, but also I think fans,

like we just talked to Meg Lennahan from the athletic for off-looking glass leaps. So it'll be out a week from today. And she made the point that anyone who's been watching international soccer was not surprised by the US Vietnam score. I think the Alex Morgan penalty was something that, you know, they would want back. It should have been a little bit of a higher margin. They missed a couple chances, but it wasn't Vietnam was a more talented team than Thailand four years ago, which I think fans kind of were like, oh, we should be beating the crap

out of every team in the group stage. Right. Every Southeast Asian nation we should be. Which is out of every team in the group stage. Right. Every Southeast Asian nation, we should be like Senegal. And also, like she made another good point, which was that in 2015, the US women's national team won the World Cup, but every game was a battle. And that's, it's very rare. Even when you have the best roster and the best team, you're not blowing people out every single game.

It's still a really tough tournament. There's a reason why winning the World Cup is very difficult to do. So the Netherlands game, yeah, it's going to be a really tough matchup. But like your point about injuries is a good one. The US women's national team is missing a couple of their best players because they had season ending injuries earlier in this year. But injuries has been the story of almost every team in this World Cup. There's a starter for the Netherlands out tonight who just got hurt. There are top stars on almost every big team that are missing this World Cup. And no one is really sure why there are so many injuries in the world right now.

There's been pieces in like every new year. But like ACLs, right? Yeah, ACL is essentially the Tommy John injury for pitchers. You're going to have at the very least one major knee injury. about like ACLs, right? Yeah, ACL is essentially the Tommy John injury for pictures. You're gonna have at the very least one major knee injury. And but there's so many. But there is a specific biology. There's biology at play and there's also surfaces

because the surfaces aren't as great as the men. Well, the murder mystery of who is killing all of these soccer players, ACLs. I mean, it's a question about gender and certainly like physiology, right? Like this is, why is it happening at a rate that is so disproportionate in women's soccer versus men's soccer, for instance?

And you're saying the surfaces are one candidate. Certainly the way the body is built is another, is that the prevailing theory? That those are the ones like I just noted. There've been multiple podcasts put on this. It is wild. It is wild, right?

That like this is a thing that is. Yeah, you can't get to attach to a young up and coming promising soccer players because their leg might snap because you know that they're at least going to have a season that's undone by injury on the club level, especially now that more that you can count on the regularity of the club schedule as Europe becomes more and more of a force in the soccer in the women's soccer world. And as more Americans gravitate towards their towards those more competitive leagues with bigger resources, you're going to be seeing this.

And the US has fallen victim to this with ill-time injuries. You could feel the team starting 11 with players that are unavailable to injury and they could probably make it to the knockout round. Well, Ali Krieger said that the US could win a World Cup with a B team and gotten a lot of trouble for saying that four years ago. So be careful. I just said knockout round. Look, I think the Philippines is kind of proving that if you're around the US soccer program, but not quite good enough to crack it or you're just closer to whatever your reasons are for picking the Philippines, this is because they're the best.

You can still make a deep run and surprise folks in this tournament and maybe make a knockout stage run. I thought that that that result from the Philippines opened my, my eyes. So a whole new women's soccer world where New Zealand should not be dropped. Yeah, the host nation, one of the host nations, right? Like the depth chart in American soccer at all levels when it comes to women's soccer is unbelievable. And it's, it's something that, you know, look, whenever we talk about the women's world cup, I'm glad that we're getting to a point where Mike in his degeneracy,

gambling on these games is also actually resembling what this sport should become, which is the thing that we don't just talk about in the frame of, this is a cause we should support because there is this larger meta conversation around how they are enemies of the right. It's just like, I get that. I'm happy to have that conversation. But in the main, I'm like, it's also high level sports that feels like it's worth gambling on for all the reasons you would gamble on other things. Yeah. And a lot of networks are gambling on it. And I don't know. I saw the the ratings for because US women's national team had their first match of the tournament, the same time Messi had his match.

And the numbers on conventional television, the Messi match was available over cable television in Spanish, over network television in Spanish language. I believe the Univision had that. And Telemundo and Fox had the women's World Cup match. And over conventional television, it was five to one, the women's World cup match and over conventional television is five to one. The women's world cup won that. But as we get into these later starts with the next match against Portugal, as it's a more difficult tournament to wrap your head around to me as someone that isn't observer of women's soccer.

I know enough about it. I was excited about it. I know about the rosters. I know about the injuries. I'm still kind of at a loss and kind of feels a little bit like a fever dream to me because I can't get ahold of when these matches are starting and it's just really hard to follow for me. And the only thing I was kind of hoping for more confirmation bias and I'm getting smack

in the face by the tournament right now telling me, oh, you don't know shit. And I can't stay up at 3 a.m. to actually learn my shit. It's frustrating. It is. I feel like I'm not sure what Fox's scheduling plan is going forward when the US is going to be playing in the middle of the night, but it is unfortunate that like I've been trying to find replays on in prime time or some sort of world cup show and like I don't know where that is. I can't figure it out. I've been listening to podcasts and kind of like seeking out my own second screen experiences. But when I'm sitting on my couch like wanting to watch TV at night, there haven't been very many games on when I'm trying to watch it.

But at the same time, international women's soccer does not revolve around the United States. It's very important for the game to have a tournament on the other side of the world. This is huge for New Zealand and Australia. New Zealand had their first men's or women's world cup game in the opening game, which they won. And then, of course, they lost to the Philippines in their second game, but it is really, really important to have games outside of just the United States and Europe, even though it isn't catered to my specific wants and needs.

I'm embarrassed to say this because I care deeply about how people perceive me and I want to have a notice. And I want people to know that I'm well intentioned and then I'm an ally, but I'm also more into the league scup because of the start times and also because I follow MLS and I follow Liga and Mekis. And to me these are dream matchups and it's a lot easier to follow.

You have to feel guilty for wanting to watch TV at 8 p.m. versus 3 a.m. I don't think anyone's telling you that you should feel bad. I'm an ally. You should probably, your guilt over this is telling me something about you that I don't think is what you want us to know about.

No, no, no, look, I mean, things that gambler and doth protest too much. I wear everything on my sleeve and I want you to know. And I've spoken to several soccer players that are women. Several. Several. Some of my favorites.

I have the same courage. I'm in hell. I'm in hell. So plot from that game as Mike the ally is establishing his credentials is also Mike just yelling out his personal gambling updates on that game we went to. Oh, dude.

Messing to score minus 150. When I say this had crypto vibes, it was because Mike was celebrating like he was watching the price of Bitcoin shoot through the room. Yeah, I, at one point my bookie just flatly told me no, no, we don't have action on Messy next goal. Yeah, after Messy scored two, Mike's like, I'm going to go for the hat trick. Let's go for the hatty. Let's go for the hatty. Let's go for the hatty.

And where there's value folks, if I can explain gambling to you right now in Emmaless Player Props, Messi's really good at soccer. We all know this, right? So what you're gonna wanna do is look at the lineup and look at the formation. Score two goals.

And see, he also had two assists. So what you're gonna wanna do is say, how many of these goals are gonna be unassisted? Probably not many. In fact, like one of the goals was unassisted, I had boost skats at plus 400 on an assist. Messi hits the ball off the post, gets his own rebound, puts it in,

that's not an assist for boost skats. Not to my bookie, anyways. I just wanna point out that Chris Cody just got in my ear and whispered, actually plaintively, I needed a charger who's also a packer. We're really fighting back here. We can't do another immaculate grid segment guys. Sure, but just one more.

It's a key to mail. It's a solution to mail loneliness. I'm going to chew on that. It's supposed to be a Miller. An option. The immaculate grid is mail. Is mail-o-zemp thick is what you're saying. This is how we're all doing self improvement.

Sam shields the charger. He wasn't. He wasn't. No. But what I'm saying is here's some gambling advice. You're going to want to look at the formation of the players around messy and bank on some of them getting assist, which you're juicy or some of them just having the ball hit off their forehead because messy puts a pinpoint pass there plus 300 on the day.

I feel bad for your bookie. Akbar wasn't a packer. Don Lebatard, you need to listen to Kushlash. Who's that? Stugats. Kushlash. Kushlash. Kushlash.

Kushlash. Kushlash. Wow. That clear things up. DCC Don Lebatard show with this Tugats. with his two gods. What are you drinking? Water, who do I have any cups? No, very preciously. Good, good water. Yeah, Jalen Brown, odd ball, what do you wanna talk about? No, you walk in and you're saying I'm macular grid.

Finally, this has been the thing. We were like, we just established that. We can't talk more macular grid. We cannot. I'd love to. I know you would, but we can. So I wanna ask you an actual basketball question. Okay.

Because the Jalen Brown contract is, like there's not a lot of sports in terms of mainstream American attention that is happening right now. Sorry baseball. But the guy that we're talking about Jalen Brown, mainstream American attention, I said it pejoratively. But in terms of the big three, the big three big story, this guy hates America. It's contracts.

It we're in contract time. So you say big three? I did not. It's contracts. It were a contract time. So big three. I did not. I did like that. You did. You definitely did. I heard you have news on me in the contract, big three or no?

I have news on Jalen Brown's contracts. I did see ice cube with Tucker the other day. Ice cube my boy. I would walk that one back now. The biggest NBA story right now. The biggest big money story right now. In the quote unquote, scare quotes, big three American sports, quote unquote, mainstream American sports,

is the fact that a dude who cannot dribble with his left hand just signed the largest contract to mean in the history of the NBA. Get a new angle. That was Ben Shapiro's. I hate that you're right about that. At least got that line off before he tweeted it, but man, did I feel bad? The first time we've seen the world the same way. That in Barbie. What's the question? What are we supposed to do with this, I mean, like you're a smart basketball person who

sees things and I am of various instincts here, right? I want to make fun of Jalen Brown because he cannot triple with his left hand. We saw that repeatedly in the post season. I also want to talk about how, yes, it's unsurprising when the new guy signs the biggest contract ever because that's the trend line of contracts. Color by numbers. It's paint by numbers. I explain this every time someone signs on the deals. I have to explain it when Rudy Gobera signed his deal, which is the biggest ever. I have to explain it when Mike Conley signed his deal, which was the biggest ever because it's all paint by numbers. The maximum salary in the NBA, by the way, the only of the professional sports that has a maximum salary in baseball and football and hockey.

If public or is the greatest player I've ever seen and he comes up on a free agency, I can offer him whatever I want as long as I fit under the salary cap into those sports. But the actual individual number you make, if I wanted to use 100% of my salary cap in NFL to pay one guy, I could. It would be an awful way to build a team, but I can do that if I value you as such. Basketball is the only one where it's like, no, no, you can't make more than this.

And what that this is is expressed as a percentage of the salary cap. So 35% is the highest bracket of max you can make of the cap. But the cap, as you said, keeps going up because the cap is based on basketball related income, which is based on the TV deals, the ticket sales, the merch sales, hot dogs, parking, all that stuff, right? So, as long as the cap is higher than it's ever been,

the first guy who signs the top max level will always have the biggest contract ever. It doesn't matter whether he's worth it or not. If we didn't have max salaries, and we paid people what they were worth, the reality is, Dixitant and we're probably maybe making 60 or 70 million. And so the Celtics would be like,

oh, I don't know if I could afford to pay Jalen Brown, because I'm already dumping 70 million this guy over here. LeBron might make 80s. That might make 90, you know? Janus might make $100 million a year. Like the numbers that we're seeing overseas for soccer players, we'd see that here. The converse of that is he vents it wouldn't be making $11 million. And Bruce Brown wouldn't be making eleven million dollars and uh... uh... brus Brown would make twenty plus million dollars the other

economic strata of the union they benefit from the max contract did a video about this yes yes oh man i i only just thought about it right now i just remember that so years ago popo did a feature on uh... michael ryan's favorite putt point guard who's name uh... feature on Mike Ryan's favorite point guard. What was his name? Tyler Johnson.

Tyler Johnson, right? Who famously vomited, the consigning his giant deal, thanks to the new CBA negotiate. You're not gonna try out that old tired observation. I have a apologize a million times. I'm not, I'm just, this is actually about Pablo and this amazing feature.

Does it seem like you're getting there, by the way? No, I was just referencing that he's my favorite. He was like a dry by-stray. I just went and kept going, right? he was one of the first. Hey, what a great fine by the Miami Heat and there's no way they're overpaying because they can't replicate this. Actually not one of the first one of the first would be like Ike Austin and Vashon Leonard and the other modern era. Yeah. Yeah. So but anyway, Tallah Johnson's science is deal this restricted Yeah, well, so but anyway, Tallah Johnson signs his deal this restricted

Fraige and deal with Brooklyn for four years fifty million dollars to the point where when I go to his house I went to his apartment in Miami on South Beach. We played FIFA. I beat him at FIFA side note look at me He has in his house. He has Brooklyn net's baby clothes That had been sent to him because he had signed the deal and assumed of course big money from Brooklyn. He's going to have to go there. And he, I believe, ended up matching and so he doesn't go, but Pablo writes about, like he said, like the kid was physically ill because he could not believe that someone would pay him this much money. Tyler Johnson had an out of body experience that resulted in his, in his stomach being

outside of his body. So what ends up happening is I think in your piece, you explain how this can only happen in a salary cap sport, we're also individual salaries are kept. And because you have to spend this much money and because I can't spend more than the max on this guy, there's all this leftover money that because I can't spend more than the max on this guy, there's all this leftover money that trickles down to the middle class. And that's how Tyler Johnson gets $50 million. Well, this is the story too.

I mean, about a salary cap, certainly, but what a union actually is trying to do. When we talk about running backs, where let's connect all of these stories you've been talking about all week, when you talk about running back pay, the question, the solution tends to be, well, they're going to form a union inside of the union. And it's like, good luck. That's kind of how the union is right now. They're all these disparate, economic strata, these classes, these positional groups that have their own interests. The Tyler Johnson's benefit from LeBron James not making nine figures. And so it's just all of these guys have incentives, good luck wrangling all of these incentives into one coherent agenda. Now, my favorite part about the story was we did a video to a company. This is back when we're big on videos, our remembering

what about this video. And so the story of Tyler Johnson, uh, single mom, like in the military and he had the military yet to work in like Air Force Base from California. You have to work in high school in the cafeteria, like with all these rich snobby kids, they hit the work, his classmates and all that stuff. And he kept getting hurt and all that stuff. So we did a video of Tyler Johnson, you know, animated dribbling, a basketball up a mountain. And like all of these different kind of, he was beautiful. Yeah, all these things.

And as he gets higher, an arm falls off, a leg falls off, but he keeps dribbling, dribbling, dribbling, and then takes off to dunk. And when he dunks, he dunks on a basket that's made out of money. And that's a max contract. But then as we zoom out, we find out that, like the mountain he was climbing was LeBron's back

in order to get to that much. Such a good fit. Oh my God, and they made us take it down. Hey, we never got to publish it. We published it. They took it down like, oh, that's right. Such a good fit. Oh my God, and they made us take it down. Hey, we never got to publish this. We published it. They took it down like, oh, that's right. They took it down like 20 minutes later

because like, it was like, oh, it makes it look like Tyler Johnson is riding LeBron and, you know, they're both. They're chains and money and felt weirdly racial. I'm like, no, me and him being like, this is a trenchant artistic interpretation of the dynamics of an NBA players association. I'll post that video later today. It's so good.

Yeah, man. That's one of my favorite things I've ever worked on. Same, and I forgot about it until now. Thank you for abiding. One of my favorite, and also, the second of my favorite things that I worked on with you that eventually got scrubbed. Mean and I keep on doing things. There are actually three things I mean that we've done together.

They got scrubbed? That either were proposed, had an actual meeting about that existed briefly and then got just erased sucked into the voice. I don't know what the third is. The second was was the James Harden podcast, which oh my god, to this day, I've never potted better in my life. This is like this. I mean, it is kind of like you've never seen Josh Gibson hit a 500 foot home run. The video doesn't exist. This is a means Josh Gibson home run. Oh, God.

It was, it was, Tony, when I tell you it was like, and you're back. Oh, my God. And everybody, it wasn't as me. It was Pablo. It was Ethan Strauss. And we were just ping ponging so effortlessly. It was awesome. So you did a feature on James Hardin, right?

This is when Hardin was going out with Chloe Kardashian Yes, I would go to I went to an a. U. tournament where James Harden was with Chloe Kardashian I was like third wheeling them. Yeah, so he writes his features and we're gonna do a podcast to kind of like promote the feature and so we start the podcast I Was a council meeting. You guys, you have to vote on it? Yeah, I was shot up in the air, guys. I did, judges.

I did reject it at once. I was like, contextually covered. Journalism. But yeah, the way they... Literally, I was there, wheeling. Yeah. So the day we set out to record is the day the Steve Sarkisian thing happens, right?

And so we start talking about the receipt came out. And it was like 17 shots of Don Julio and 25, like Miller lights and then at the end, there was like, you know, two micolobes or something like that. And I said, who is this ungrateful? This generous man says anything, we got it all. Hey guys, have something that's like, I'll order a menu, right? So. You got two mika lobes.

So we joke about this, but then we start talking about like, low key, it's not really, whoop, I might have pressed the wrong button there. Low key, it's not really talked about. Did you just face that I thought that was my shoe? I thought it was my shoe. I thought it was my shoe. I thought it was my shoe. And it's not just coaches, it's not just players,, but alcohol is run rampant in sports.

And it's not just coaches, it's not just players, it's media, it's everybody. And we're talking about how like, no one really talks about this, but this thing is real, like, and it's pervasive. No, and alcoholism, certainly in the case of Steve Sarkisian, into alcohol abuse, into the vague definitions of it, led us back to the topic we were there to discuss that day.

Dude, it was seamless. Which happened to be James Hardett. And then next thing you know, like we have this great conversation by him and like the Kardashians and also the substance abuse in sports and we posted and 15 minutes later, so you gotta take it down. You guys are making fun of alcoholism.

Like no, we're not. We're actually like pointing out. We're doing an artistic interpretation of a podcast about alcoholism. Do you remember what happened later that day? I do not. Lamar Odom found on Deaths Door. Right.

And we had the part we talked about, Kardashians, we talked about. Everything was. Yes, fame. And you'd nelming your senses because you're a celebrity, trying to navigate this world that certainly now has been deeply covered about unhappiness and and the NBA in its modern era ahead of all of them on it. We were number one. So where is it and what do you get? You take it down. What was the third thing that got screwed? The third thing was when before we launched high noon

we talked about doing a show. You and me and a mean doing a TV show. And part of the premise was we would do the TV show in a certain way. I mean, do you remember the pitch? I'll give it out because I'm still going to do that show. I will do that show. If it's the last thing I do, that concept will live on Pablo with or without you. We were going to do it backwards. Don Lebertard, Mino Hassan, Spugatz, Mino Hassan. This is the Don Lebertard show with the Spugatz. Can I finally tell my shark story without Mike Ryan

Tony toppering me with his plane getting struck by lightning? Because I really think that this is something I want to get off my chest. There's been a lot of weird aquatic animal activities. This is like the year of Orcas and sharks. I mean, didn't know that I got hit by lightning. Yeah, can you tell me a little bit about that? Yeah, I was on a plane. She's fine.

Everything's fine. He's here. It's okay. How long did it take before he tweeted about that? Yeah, I was on a plane. I hear it quite like. Everything's fine, he's here, it's okay. How long did it take before you tweeted about him? Like, what was the time? Threaded about it, Chris. I don't know. I didn't thread about it, but if you subscribe to me

on Instagram, and at Twitter, I didn't skid it. I just remember seeing, I'm a sub, so I saw that. I will not have someone that pays for a blue check. Come at me for my, so I don't pay for blue checks. Check my shit. Check my shit. You don't pay for a blue check? No. What? So I have a blue check come at me for my so I don't pay for blue check check my shit You don't pay for blue check. No, what? Have a blue check. Sorry. You got blue check you Blue just stop pill you got blue check you got bullied into a soft and sobbing a bay. No. Yeah, no

What you stop it bully me Mike? I can't no You can't bully did nobody you just decided that my own Valetional blue check anymore. Okay, cuz Ryan Cortez got to please I can't believe it. Nobody. You just decided that on my own volition. I was like, no, no, took down all sides to doing. He has a haircut of a donor bubbly. He looks like he's running a super pack. Young Republican. Yeah, young Republican. College young Republican. Yeah. It makes a lot of sense now. I didn't realize. It was Kevin Clark. Anyways, I was at the beach last week and this will not surprise anyone. But there was a shark attack that happened, that part might surprise people. There was a shark attack that happened at the beach right after I got out of the water,

but I missed it because I was on TikTok. Wait, a shark, a shark attack? A shark bit someone in the ocean right after I got out of the ocean and I was on my towel drying off, scrolling TikTok, totally zoned out. And people are running to someone's aid behind you. Or whistles, there were ambulance sirens, there were people congregated around this person. I don't know if he's okay.

I have seen one of the things that I have noticed the most in the absence of local news being funded anymore, is little things like this that happen, that normally you'd see a local news package on or see a local news story on there's never follow up on any of it anymore you just see like a headline here and then that's it there's no follow up so the local news report put out that a man was being treated for a shark attack i have seen nothing since then it's been a week so i hope he's okay i. I do not know. In this news report that I'm seeing, the man was a six-year-old man,

bitten in way steep water. And within that story, they don't provide an update. They say no further as they was provided. I don't think he was identified. I don't think he reached out to the newspaper to give his own update. I don't think anyone from the news went to the hospital to try to identify him. I don't think there's any follow-up. I just don't think anyone from the news went to the hospital to try to identify him.

I don't think there's any follow-up. I just don't think that that's the thing that happens anymore. He's not a snitch. He's not a boy. So I was just sitting there scrolling. He is getting stitches, though. Ha ha.

I was kind of done it. I mean, it's a pretty good laugh, but I don't know the condition of the man, so I don't feel like putting naked next fine. Let me just say right now, I went to a wedding, this is like five years ago, whatever, and it was a beach wedding. And so I went in the water and everyone's like, they're sharks, and I said, famously, we have an agreement.

I don't think sharks really mess with me. Like, I think we're, we're, we're having agreement. Because here's the first one. How is it? Where was this agreement brokered? What convention did you broker this shark truce with? We made eye contact with a shark once and it let all the other ones know. They got a newsletter.

But here's the deal, Jess. Sharks don't like human flesh. So I'm willing to bet dollars to donuts that this dude is all right. I mean, albeit like stitches and hospitalizing all that like as all right. I mean, I'll be it like stitches and hospitalized and all that like as all right. I heard of screaming in pain. Oh, that was alarm. You heard it. I did. And so and did you turn up the volume on? You can continue dancing. You don't dance while you watch tiktok's old man. I was scrolling. I was scrolling and my friend

was like, Hey, something's going on over there. And it was like 120 degrees with the heat index that day. So I was not about to venture out from under my umbrella. I was very hot. And I was like, oh, wow, yeah, something is going on. And then I saw the EMTs and the ambulance and stuff coming. I was like, oh shit, something serious is happening. And I thought maybe he stepped on a stingray or stepped on a shell

and cut his foot like Tony did on in Hawaii that one time. There's not a coral attack by the way. Yeah. And so I was thinking like, yeah, not a shark. Coral's alive. The coral attacked you. Correct. It's alive. It's alive. It's alive. I know it's a living thing, but did the coral move? It's like those things in Arizona, right? They throw the spikes at you. Oh, yeah, yeah, the plant. you. Yeah, the plant. Yeah. Yeah, the corals.

What? There's a plant that like shoots stuff. It was really a sea turtle's fault, to be honest. I was snorkeling sea turtle. I went to go chase it. Turned around. Coral got me. What, you're chasing a turtle.

Also, how did you not catch it? I just went to watch it. They're fast. They swim in the water. They don't fly in the water. They are not fly. They are not fly. What's so happening? Not me happening for the coral, I agree.

Anyways, I was not able to follow up and see what happened, but my lasting memory of the shark attack is that they loaded this man into two Coast Guard pickup trucks. All the EMTs were sitting on the back of the pickup trucks. All these lifeguards were sitting on the back and they drove off the beach. And a woman was running behind the trucks chasing it off the beach. And I think she might have been a relative of the guy that got bitten by the shark. And I was like, why couldn't they give her a seat

in the pickup truck? She was like sprinting after it. I felt so bad. How tall was this guy? I'm not sure. Because you put two pickup trucks back to the... He wasn't on the pedal by the truck, obviously. The bed to bed on the pickup truck. How tall was this guy? I'm not sure. Because you put two pickup trucks back to the bed. You were on the bed to pick up truck.

Obviously. The bed to bed on the pickup truck. I got asked dynamic of two pickup trucks. I'll go in reverse. You go forward. Go, now, now, now. Speed up. So, like, I don't know what type of truck did this,

but. I had to have been little. Yeah. Negate this guy. I was going in reverse. Injuries. That's going on in there. They thought that I said that the guy was laying across the bed of two pickup trucks. We didn't say that. And not that there were two trucks he was inside of one and there was a second truck following it. They are now trying to explain

how two trucks could ask to ask drive out of the beach. Guys, we should really find out if this person is so happy. One goes in reverse. He's one goes in reverse. He's fine. We have an agreement. We have an agreement. I do. I'm worried about a meme.

I'm worried about a meme. It was really, really hurt. There would have been a follow-up story. Oh, it hurts like a, like, look, he's in great pain. And he's gonna have a scar and all those things. But again, trucks don't eat humans. They don't like the taste of it. I would like to-

I just saw a video of a shark eating. There's a lot of multiples of like fatal shark attacks this year in the US, haven't they? I would like to nominate a mean as the worst possible lifeguard to be on a beach. No, he'd be the best, because the sharks aren't gonna attack him. He could just jump into their fun,

the fun, the frenzy. You've been agreement. I'd be like, Kyle, come on man Oh, is that a mean over there? Oh, I know Exactly, you're good dude. You're good But in in following all these IGA counts because I do respect and fear the ocean I do too and

When you follow all these regions in America have their own dedicated Sites and they get aggregated like here, we have only in date. Oh, I love only in date. Yeah, and love that. There's a daily loud for Egypt. Yeah, well, there's stuff like that, but you realize that shark species. I'm locked in there.

So I need to use that aren't necessarily known to be in specific regions or popping up. In Miami, there was a video of a great white shark that went viral. And I don't know if this is so much cell phones and cell phone signals being readily available. Cell phones are cell phones. Oh, cell phone. Wow.

That's like a Drake lyric. Yeah. Fursy. I don't know exactly what it is changing. Oh, boy. Water temperatures and whatnot, but it does seem like there are species showing up in strange places and they're a little bit more agitated. That's what I'm saying.

I've been going to this ocean my whole life. I have ocean bonafide guys. I've never seen a shark there before. Where I'm going with this is from at Cuban mofo underscore. Oh, I should have been at Cuban mofo. Is that why you're no longer verified is just because you switched Twitter handles, Tony? That's my burner.

That's your burner. From, so credit to ad Cuban mofo. Off of Key Largo, he found a pod of orcas. Orcas. Right. Not known. No. Not known to be anywhere near Florida. So the orca thing no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I have had to go. I mean, not a metaphor,

just actual orcas, literal orcas. So you gotta be careful because the meme was about to make a better. But I know where orcas are. I've had to go to the Pacific Northwest. Did you just the San Juan Islands whale watching one time? I've gone multiple. I've been watching the San Juan Islands off of watching state. So I mean, I have work of gonna feed it. You've gone upwards of a half dozen times as I have. What if you didn't see a way out your basketball party? Your friends would have been like, what a lose. Get a new Oregon coast. Get a new excursion, by the way. You're just doing the same thing everywhere you go. What's the new way? You've seen them

all. I went whale watching, how you doing? How do girls agree? I went whale watching once in Vancouver. Yes, I've been whale watching that. You've been coovering well. And we didn't see a killer whale, but they gave me a lifetime guarantee that I would see a killer whale. So I have this ticket that whenever I fly

for Miami back to Vancouver, I can take the same tour for free. What do you see in one blowhole fully disagree. My guy. It's the same thing. Have you seen a sperm whale? That was a really good impression. And here it comes, there's the water.

I haven't seen a sperm whale. I've seen a fully breaching humpback whale. I've seen orcas on the ferry. This is a long trample. Get to your observation about the key LARCO orcas. The point is, orcas should not be there. And orcas, in fact, in the ecosystem of the ocean, are the things that, of course, great white sharks fear

because orcas go for their livers. Are they hunting great white sharks? Yes. Yes. If the water is getting warmer and the water and the waters are warmer around Florida Why are great white sharks coming to Florida and why are Orca also coming to hunt down in Florida? So there are two reasons wait is the plural of Orca Orca? There's a movie called Orca, which is it was jaws, but in Orca

Did you get the beer for the Meg too? Did you think of the purview for the Meg too? I did. It's not complete. The glory of the quench the whale. Keep your eye on the ball here. Why are there orcas in Kiela? There are new possible reasons, okay? One of them explains why I've been seeing humpback whales in New York Harbor, which did not happen.

That reason is... I thought that was COVID. Invirummental cleanliness. The waters are better now. The second reason is the opposite. The environment is being destroyed and no animals know where to be anymore. Or their billionaires seeking attacks haven. It's the closest thing to your assing park in real life.

WOOOOO! WEE! It's the closest thing to your assing park in real life! Come on!