The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz - The Big Suey: Zaslow Is An Excellent Speller (feat. Solen Base Leader Dave Dameshek)

Episode Date: January 30, 2026

"I'd probably..." Yammerin' Dave Dameshek stops by to break down what he's excited about ahead of the Super Bowl, but Dan's concerned he might just be microwaving turds. Could he... miss Jeremy? Plus, Tony and Mike chat with the greatest No. 6 in Miami Heat history, and the crew gives an educational suggestion for folks suffering from insomnia. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys? I've done it. And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar.

This episode of the Dan Levitart show is presented by Draft Kings. Draft Kings. The crown is yours. Dave Damashek is going to join us here. Football America is a really good show. He does it with the Fuentes Brothers. It comes out on Monday and Fridays, and he has a lot of fun and weird and football history as well. So there's a wide net that he's casting twice a week on Football America. We will get to him in a second. But Jeremy, I want to go back to something here with Janus. Jake Fisher has tweeted about the Bucs, the Bucs, the Bucs, and they're asked for Janice. Quote, they're asking for the Moon. One general manager told him Thursday morning, all of your young players and all of your draft picks. Now, Jeremy keeps saying to anyone who will listen

that he is talking to Milwaukee reporters and they like the heat deal better than the Warriors deal. But Milwaukee reporters are not the ones making this trade, and I don't think Milwaukee reporters get to be sources. Where is it and how is it that you arrive at the heat's offer being better than the Warriors offer, other than those Bucks reporters having opinions because they watch basketball.

Because of what the heat can offer and what the Bucks reportedly want, Dan. So they want blue chip prospects, and they want future picks. The heat can actually offer you both. As it presently stands, there are two parts of this. The heat can make maneuvers, sort of the move before the move,

that can add more picks, and I'll get to that in just a second. But what the heat offer right now, If it's every young player, it's Kala Ware. It's Jaime Hawkes Jr. who's a six-man-of-the-year candidate right now, which is 24 years old. It's Tyler Hero and All-Star Guard turning 26. And as much as we all around heat fandom are constantly downplaying Hero because he has been a piece that many people have looked at as the thing that hasn't gotten them over the top, he's a 26-year-old all-star guard. He can't stay healthy.

And the Bucks, what you have to remember in all of this, They don't have their future picks beyond this year. So while they want to tank the rest of the season, in order to build a core around the top-level pick that they're about to get this year, they need to assemble a deeper young core moving forward. And do you want to do that with Jonathan Kaminga and Brandon Pajimski? Or do you want to do that with Kalao Ware, Kasper Seyakochonis, who was just a first-round pick, who's a 19-year-old point guard, Jaime Hakez Jr., potentially Nico Yovic. that's something that can work for them

and the picks that they're going to get from the Warriors if the Warriors are really good over the next two, three years are all going to be at the end of the first round. So to me, when you look at that and you talk about potentially moving Hero and Wiggins as the salary instead of Jimmy Butler, what you're dealing with is two guys who will be on expiring deals next season who are future movable players for even more first-round picks if you want them. Or Tyler Hero, you can give an extension and he can be one of the pieces during this stretch.

Do me a favor here. Howard Beck is saying the Lakers are involved. The writing is very small on your board, so I can't see whether you have the Lakers up there. But do me the favor real quick. With your back to us, just stand in front of the center of the board real quick. I just want you to stand in front of the center of the board. There's a reason I'm doing this. Just cover up the name of Janus Ante Cicumpo to the degree you can. And I want to ask everyone here in the room to try and spell the last name onto Ticumpo.

Anybody, I want Damesh to give it a try as well. You're raising your hands as though. Are you confident about your ability to spell the name onto Ticompo? Yep. You're confident. Damash, do you want to give this a shot? Go ahead. Jeremy, you just make a buzzer sound as soon as Damashik gets something wrong.

Go ahead, Damashek, go ahead and try and spell onto Ticompo. All right. A. N. T. I'm writing this as I say it. That's why I'm looking down. A.

N-T-E-K. Nope. Wait, that was going to slip. No, no. G. I know. I know. Nope.

You're out. Tony, go ahead and try and spell onto the compo. Uh, A-N-T-E-U-K. Nope. T-T-T, not K-K-K-K. Okay, Mike, you want to take a shot in onto Ticompo? I'm not here to be deposed. Chris, you want to take a shot?

Yeah, I won't take a quiz. Okay, Zazlo wants to take a shot here. Let's go back to Damme. I'm not going to take a shot, but we're going to do it right. Let's go back. Jeremy can do it. No, let's go back to Damashek here. Let's go back again to Damashek.

Damashik, go ahead and try again. A, N-T-E, a T, I mean, E. No. E-E-E-E. Wrong a lot. G-R-I. I'm out, I'm out. E-K-space, F-R-E-A-K.

Go ahead, Zaz, you go ahead and take a shot at it. A-N-T-E-T-O-K-O-U-N-P-O. Oh. Ding, ding, ding. Dave's, oh. That was... Color me impressed. That was impressed.

Look at the swagger in Zazlo over here after getting all his words wrong for the last... I'm an excellent speller. Exxon speller. You can't speak, but you can spell. Exxon speller. Zaz. In, in, no, fifth grade. I, we had a spelling quiz every Friday.

And me and Kristen Larson had not missed a word about two-thirds of the way through the school year. Zero. Like, and there was a, like, it was a, you know, a perfect star for every time you got a perfect score on the spelling quiz. And then one spring day, Kristen Larson, missed a word. And Damashet continued his streak all the way through the fifth grade. Never missed a single word in the spelling quiz. How about that? Claim to fame. It is amazing how much more interesting you found that than the rest of us. Also, despite a last. of raw foot speed in Little League in three seasons, 34 for 34 and stolen bases. How about that?

So you are a smart? Color me impressed. All right. Put it on the poll at Levitard show. As a base stealer, was Damashek a good speller at Levitard show? Cunning of a mongoose. Let me tell you this very quickly, because I know you like to interrupt. And my time is short here.

And so I'm going to get it all out as quickly as I can. First of all, best football movie ever, all the right moves. Shout out to Lethal Weapon, a fun little football scene. Spin it out, man. Spin it out. Zaslow and I talked about, I was right about QB wins, take that mean it comes. Try to grapple with the fact that your hero, Sam Darnold, now is burnished his legacy for all of time by winning that game. Make sense of that one. Best TV show to rewatch is The Simpsons. curb your enthusiasm is better than Seinfeld. How about them penguins? And I need to confess, I did not vote for Bill Belichick for the Hall of Fame, mostly because I don't have a vote.

Put it on the poll at Levitard show, mostly, huh? Is curb your enthusiasm better than Seinfeld? I don't know what the mathematical odds would have to be against the idea that you'd have two running series so popular. that curb your enthusiasm could end with fixing the Seinfeld ending because you have two series involving two characters that can rewrite a joke that is 12 years old, like the odds against that are crazy. Let's talk about something else that the odds are crazy against. Your interest in this Super Bowl, ostensibly, if I were to not give you these teams and just simply say, we have in front of us the most

unlikely Super Bowl of all time. There's never been a 60 to 1 and an 80 to 1 odds teams facing each other. Everybody would be excited about that in the abstract. Why are they less excited about that in the actual? Well, because you were getting at it about 10, 20 minutes ago, Dan. It's about who the champion has to go through to become the champion. It's the competition around you. It's Al Lee being in the same era with Frazier and with form and in Norton and all the rest of them. The reason I hold up the Pittsburgh Steelers is the greatest dynasty of the Super Bowl era is because of the competition around them in that era. The 70s included, the mighty Miami Dolphins, the Dallas Cowboys, the Oakland Raiders, the Minnesota Vikings, the Rams were real good and so on. If I told you or asked you to make a list

of the 10 or 12 greatest teams of the Super Bowl era, I just named roughly a third or half of the teams that would make that list. And who stood head and shoulders above them all? The Pittsburgh Steelers, four times out of a half dozen years. That's what makes them great is the competition. And there is a sense of, like we've talked about, parity is a negative. It is mediocrity. It's just a synonym for mediocrity is parity. And only, thank goodness, for Woody Johnson and for Jimmy Haslam and their ineptitude, or otherwise it would just lay bare the fact that this is just basically a communist operation where every team's number eventually comes up. This is the best argument I can make on behalf of the Patriots winning this game.

Tell me if you have a better one. The best argument I can make is you weren't watching football all season if you think Darnold has been the last two games, what he was, over a 10-game stretch toward the end of the season. The San Francisco 49ers were broken and the Rams defense is bad. So there is the possibility that the Patriots defense can actually make San Francisco. Darnold look like Sam Darnold again. That's my best argument. Do you have a better one? Yeah, well, I mean, I think it has more to do with as much as I perpetuate the narrative of big spot for Sam Darnold and can he, you know, QB wins in the postseason and all of that. The reality of who he is is that he has games where he throws multiple picks and that

would be the Patriots big shot in this one to be able to do that. The other side of it is though the weird conversation that's emerged around Drake May, and that he's been bad against better competition, which, I mean, in terms of passing numbers and the weather probably impacted them a bit in Denver, too, but it still counts if you're a quarterback and you make plays with your legs. I know we celebrate Lamar Jackson and Josh Allen when they do that.

Somehow Drake May is diminished for that. Well, look at his, look at he through 50% completion rate. Yeah, he also made decisive plays that won them the game, ultimately, in the AFC title game. And that still counts, even if he's, does it against the Seahawks. Couldn't I make the argument? I don't know if I can make it, because I haven't looked at it statistically, that Drake May was the best runner at the position this year, given that Lamar Jackson wasn't running very much this year. I mean, off the top of my head,

obviously, I don't know. But yeah, I mean, I think it was a consistent factor for the Patriots all season long. Yeah. Listen up, folks. It's game day, and you already know what that means. The noise, the jerseys, the group chat's going crazy. I'm telling you no game day is complete without the world's number one Vaca. You know that that is Smyrinoff. We're talking easy cocktails. Tons of flavors. Perfect for every kind of fan over 21. Whether you're riding with your squad, watching from home or celebrating like your team already won the first quarter. Smyranoff is the official vodka partner of the NFL. It's award winning and it's been bringing people together since

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football because football because Justin ball football football football Stugats

This is the Dan Lebatter show With the Stugats Because Justin Herbert was great at a necessity running for his life The last five games or so But Drake May did do that all season Certainly on design runs I think Herbert had so many scramble yards

But if I also, Drake May has a ton of scramble yards too, though. But if I give you a quarterback in one game, answer me this question, okay? Do you want Sam Darnold? Do you want the quarterback who's the best deep ball passer in the league and runs better than anyone else in the league? Ooh, that is a great question that I haven't considered. So basically the question is all things being equal, right? We're not trying to assess Drake May with the team. No, all I'm doing, what I'm doing is the Darnold reputation.

and all the things that Darnold is against all the things May is going to be because he's already the best deep ball thrower in the league and we just said he's the best runner at the position in the league too. So you're headed into the biggest game of your life. What's the skill set that you want? The skill set you want because the baggage of Sam Darnold, the stink is off now. That's the magic.

That's the voodoo of winning in big spots that it imbues you with a different level of confidence, whereas I do suspect Drake May probably has some doubt. Man, I have not played well these last few weeks against high-end competition, and now I have to play probably the best defense in the league. Raw, I mean, just like in a vacuum, I guess I like at this point Drake May's skill set better, as you say.

You just identified the two greatest qualities he has, which are the deep shots and the ability to functionally scramble and run design. No, and he's also great against the blitz, 17 touchdowns, no interceptions, but this is where I would quibble with you, though. I know everyone says the Seahawks are the best defense in the league, but what they're best at is stopping the run. They don't allow 100-yard rushers. The last two defenses he's played, I think, are harder for a quarterback to pass against than the one he's about to play. Yeah, I guess so. I mean, we're splitting hairs if we're debating Seahawks or Texans. I think the Broncos are probably just a tick below. those other two.

You know, those Not pass rush, they're not. Not pass rush. They're not. Right, but that's secondary and specifically those big corners can really, can really beat up.

I mean, Stefan Diggs and otherwise. I mean, I don't like, I mean, that's the case, by the way, for Drake May over Matthew Stafford as the MVP is the weapons that they respectively had. One guy was throwing at the Pook and Nakua and Devante Adams

and the other one's throwing it to old. Stefan Diggs and Hunter Henry. I mean, you know, that's the case. By the way, one one is division, the other one finished third. But yeah, I think that obviously the inability to run the ball, let's assume that the Seahawks are going to be able to take that away. Now the game's all on Drake May's shoulders with Stefan Diggs against those big corners.

I don't love that matchup for him. Dave, impromptu drip drill here. The Super Bowl uniform matchup. I was worried about this one because Navy, is prominent in both these uniforms. Now, the AFC is the home team. And rather than go with the home uniforms, I think this was a good development, the Patriots have opted for their all-white ensemble, which not the greatest look in their arsenal, but in terms of color clash, does lend itself to something that is a bit easier on the eye. So I want your takeaway on the uniform

matchup. And do these uniforms look too busy with a debut of the America 250 patch? Well, I like that you're providing a little ray of sunshine there, Mike. That's nice of you to do because, to be honest with you, this uniform matchup sucks. And part of the reason it sucks is because of the distance between what the reality will be and what is available. I know that they'll say, well, you're not supposed to wear your throwbacks and all that crap. But listen, it would be gorgeous. The Pat Patriot, don't you know? Pat Patriot?

The white ones are nice with the red pantheroons and, you know, snapping the ball. You ever notice, by the way, that Pat Patriot, if you kind of blur your eyes, it looks like Bill Belichick. By the way, Bill Belichick, definitely not rooting for the Patriots in this game. And I also suspect Tom Brady isn't rooting for the Patriots. But the Seahawks, if they would wear the royal blue and the silver and the Kelly Green, it would be beautiful. Instead, we get this nightmare of a matchup. It's just an atrocity for the eyes. Dave, while there is precedent for a team opting for throwbacks in a Super Bowl,

the Patriots and the Rams squared off and the Rams opted for a throwback look, it's a pretty unprecedented move. So of the traditional looks available, I do think. Would anybody balk if they did it? Who would complain if that's what they did? If they said, yeah, we decided we're going Pat Patriot. And by the way, I've talked with high-end Patriots, Chris Long and otherwise, from the Brady era with the Patriots.

We resolved way back when and now the ship is sailed. When Brady left, so too should the flying Elvis uniforms. That should have been an era that stood on its own in New England lore, and then they should have reverted back to Pat Patriot, and we'd all be much happier. Too many patches? Too many patches on these things? I mean, if I start shaking my fist and pounding the table about patches on uniforms,

I'm just going to make myself loco and hurt my hand. Put it on the poll, please, at Lebitard show. is Belichick rooting for the Patriots in the Super Bowl and also put it on the poll at Levitart show? Is Tom Brady rooting for the Patriots in this Super Bowl? I made a mistake there. I have a quick story for you, Dan. I once was at a Super Bowl in Houston, Texas. And I had an interview book.

Yeah, I sit there and listen. It's a good story. I had an interview with the quarterback of the Houston Texans, early one morning. And he showed up. And oh, hello, Deshaun Watson. I'm Dave. it's nice to meet you. And we had a pleasant conversation that ran about 15, 20 minutes. And somewhere along the way, I asked him because Trevor Lawrence had just won another national title for the Clemson Tigers.

And I said, this is great stuff. What an era. You win a title, Trevor. You don't want Trevor Lawrence to win another one, though, do you? And he said, why wouldn't I want that? And I said, well, because then that would obviously make two for him and make him the greatest Clemson quarterback of all time. And we chuckled and we moved on to whatever other subject. And about an hour later, I received a phone call that DeShan did not like that question. I never thought I would miss Jeremy. The worst part about that, okay, is that. Teddy child.

The worst part about that is we're getting his football America recycled shit. It's not even fresh. It's not even that he just thinks it's a good story. You just microwave the turd damn? He microwaved a turd from football America. He got a air fright. He liked it. And I wanted to interrupt the story with Jessica snoring, but I got in her monologue over there, waving me off.

That's a good story. Yeah, but I heard it already because you're giving us your recycled goop. You caught me. All right. I have no pushback on that. Not only did I catch you. The worst part of it is, do you realize that I can give the audience nothing better than I made a mistake there, and that's what you interrupted.

I started with, let me correct a mistake I made. It's the best thing I can give the audience. And you're like, nope, let me give him some recycled shit. A big turd burger. Listen, mistakes were made, but let's not live life in the rearview mirror, Dan. The mistake I made is saying that Drake May is a better runner at quarterback than Josh Allen. You cannot put him ahead of Josh Allen. But we have, coming up later in the show, we have, this is rare around here.

We don't do it very much, a super. Starting NFL quarterback. And I told you it was damn good, too. I told you that. That doesn't mean anything. You say everyone. Coming from you, it means nothing that you think that they're a good quarterback. It's not, no.

Who is the starting NFL quarterback that would excite you the least, Dave? Starting NFL quarterback. I don't want to play this game. Can it be somebody who did start a game this year? Sure. We've got... Pad tits, pad tits, MacGyones. It'd be a good get, honestly.

McCorkle's great. He's a fun get. He gritted with Chris of the Super Bowl. We have an NFL starting quarterback joining us later in the show, but I believe it's the one that most would say. What are you doing there? Just don't finish that sentence.

Everyone knows where you're going. I think it's a good one. It's a great one. What's the worst that could happen? I'd most like to hear, well, two is the guy who's too honest. So it would be fun to hear from him about this.

Super Bowl matchup. I think the most interesting guy to hear on the microphone these days who plays quarterback is Bake. Mike Ryan's guy one time MVP candidate up until about week 11, according to Mike Ryan. Football America, Mondays and Fridays, check out the material before he recycles it, heats it up, and serves it as a turd on our show. See you later. I'm sorry, that happened. I got caught. Get out of you. I am sorry. Let's go Penn. How about that Penguins, Roy? Enough of you. I've had enough of you. I've had enough of you. Roy, what are you, you're talking to Roy? He's hearing me.

Wherever he is, he's hearing me, and he knows the truth. Look out for 87, everybody. We're the Panthers, indeed. Chris, I'd like to ask you a question, just curiosity as someone who cares about how this show sounds. Dave Damashek and his general peeking at the beginning of this screaming at us in a way that distorts all our microphones. How did you feel? That's on me. I need to be better there with the levels.

Okay, that's on you. I need to know when he shows up, put it to half. Okay. With Amex Platinum, almost every purchase made with your card can be covered with points, including new tastes, new fits, and virtually everything in between. That's the powerful backing of Amex. Conditions apply. I was guilty of multiple skin care crimes.

Two counts of sleeping and makeup. One count of using disposable wipes. I knew my first. routine had to change. So I switched to Garnier-Missler water. It gently cleanses, perfectly removes makeup, and provides 24-hour hydration. Clear away the evidence with the number one Missler Water worldwide by Garnier. Local news is in decline across Canada, and this is bad news for all of us. With less local news, noise, rumors, and misinformation fill the void, and it gets harder to separate truth from fiction. That's why CBC News is putting more journalists in more places

across Canada, reporting on the ground from where you live, telling the stories that matter to all of us, because local news is big news. Choose news, not noise. CBC News. Don Lebertard. While there's nothing official, and conversations are still ongoing. Was that a fake shefter? I tried.

It was pretty good. It was excellent. I feel like there's legs. I tried at the beginning, and then I lost confidence in it. Why? It was good. Yeah, you got this. There's nothing official.

Yeah, it's so good. And conversations are still ongoing. Stugats. It is trending towards Nick Siriani, remaining the head coach of the Eagles. This is the Dan Lebatar show with the Stugats. Mike Ryan, where were you last night? What were you doing last night? And how fun or not fun was it?

It was plenty fun. I was at a championship celebration. Miami has won four pro sports championships in the last 12 months. We are Title Town USA. Can you count them, Dan? You have Inter-M Miami. You have the back-to-back Florida Panthers. You obviously have the Cyclones in Battlecourt, and you have Miami 305. The Big Three Champions. Mario Chalmers hit the game-winning shot in an iconic final. Ice cold. All right. Four championships in 12 months. We're not often associated with the title of Tidal Town, but we went to Coconut Grove right next to your old stomping grounds where you got arrested

that one time by Barracuda. And we celebrated it. with the Big Three champions, Miami 305. And if you're not familiar with the roster, great South Florida sports luminaries and Lance Stevenson. Howdy everyone? It's Mike Ryan, Tony Kaladdeud, Sean McGill. Approximately 75% of all-to-all Cubans are here in Coconut Grove. We are here to celebrate Miami 305, Big Three champs.

Miami's title town. Makes it noise for your 2025. Big three champions. Let's go talk to some champs. I'm here with Reggie Evans, Reggie. How's the feel, man? Championship bringing it to my air. Nah, this is real good.

How do you feel the transition was from NBA to Big Three? Oh, it wasn't too bad, you know what I'm saying? Cause we've played the game for so long, so we're not adapt to anything. Oh, my man, a champion mascot, here you go. The only Flamingo to never skip leg day right there. What's the name? Fling! What's the name?

Miami without a flag. You got the best nickname in NBA history born ready. Where to come from? How do you feel about it? My name came from Rutgers Park by Bito gave me born ready and I stuck with it since now. Hey look you still got it me. You play Miami so much in the playoffs in the NBA. Now coming down and bringing a championship down to Miami, how does it feel? Oh man, it felt great. I mean, you know, he was a viral team but you know I had to get down with the Miami squad and We got the ring, so. All right, we're here with the greatest number six in Miami Heath franchise history. The man, he's not only won an NBA title.

He's not only won an NCAA title. He's not only won a big three title. He's won a Fibba Champions League title. He is a four-time champion all across the globe. That gets you in the Hall of Fame, Mario Traummers. Do you agree with that? And do you agree that you are the greatest number six in the history of the Miami Heat? I agree with the Hall of Fame, but I definitely think I should get a nod.

But the six, you gotta get at the bronze. Come on, now. All right. We'll settle for the greatest number 15 in Miami Heat history. All right, so obviously we're recognizing champions here. Mike just got recognized GM of the year. Look what they brought them. A nice, ice cold margarita complimentary.

They said, you're a champion, right? And he said, yes, of course. They asked me if I wanted a margarita. And I said, I'm working. Bring it over. Here with legendary Miami Hurricane Jack McClinton. Founding member of Miami 305 built this incredible world champion Big Three roster.

We have something in common outside of our passion for the Miami Hurricanes. You know, I'm a bit of a GM myself. I built the Battle Corps champions. You built the Big Three champions. How do you identify a championship Big Three side jack? I'm a part of the process, but there's a lot of moving parts. It's great ownership, you know, great partners. We got great players.

We want guys that are dogs. We don't care about nothing else. We want good energy. We want dogs. Guys are going to fight for the prize. Jack, how great was it beating the Ohio State and the Miami? I said, in that cotton bowl. Ohio State and Miami.

Let's go. Game on the line. Five seconds left. You're bringing the ball up court. Mario Chalmers is bringing the ball up court. Who is more likely to hit a dagger? You or Rio. Mario Chalmers.

Did you see the big three? A champion. Did you watch it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've seen it. Mario, I've been telling the boys over at the show, Michael Beezie, one of the coldest bucket getters, of all time, okay, no matter what.

Can you give me a top five bucket getters in the NBA? Or time? All time. I put Rio on the spot too. You gotta put B's in there, you gotta put Katie, Kobe, okay? You got to go with Michael Joy at first, Kobe, Cameron Durant.

One of my personal favorites is always gonna be D-Waid, and then MJ. MJ. Jeff Curry, LeBron, man. We got some legends, we got some goats in the bucket-getter conversation, Mike. 305, baby, brought it to the house. Let's go.

Think about Lance and I would say every game. He was trying to fight, not fight, like fight, but like his energy was ready. We're trying to win. I don't care who we playing. First seat, last seat. Lance traded like the championship. Every game, it was a championship for Lance. And we won a championship.

He treated every game like that. He treated me like a brother. That's love. Team 305, man. Appreciate you guys. Thank you so much. Why does no one who has played in the NBA understand? the bucket get it. They don't get it down.

How is it that no one understands you can't put Beasley with Michael Jordan. Yeah, we were very, you gotta have Beasley. We were very kind to Lance Stevenson in the edit. On number two, he just stared blankly for 35 seconds. Well, he was, I mean, he was obviously. It was a title celebration.

It was a bit of a cross situation. We had a couple things in there. I asked Mike Ryan today, did you blow in Lance's face? Like, because... We were close. I was angling for it. He wouldn't have noticed. Here's the thing. No, he wouldn't.

Very disrespectful move to be a, you know, a surprise. I didn't feel like I was like a cranky anchor, right? I don't want to surprise him with blowing him in his ear. He would have kicked my ass. These basketball players, tall, big. Mario Chalmers is my size. Yo, Mario Chalmers, I mean, you laid out the resume there. Dude's one of the all-time winners.

I actually shorted him because he's a multiple-time NBA champion, and he also won a Greek league. And for two of those titles, he hit the shot that won the title. He's won it every... level. If it's the Basketball Hall of Fame, legendary Kansas Jayhawk has his jersey retired. He was serious when he said that. Dude, I...

Why not? He has a good argument. When you look at what he's done globally, find me a bigger global winner than Mario Chalmers. I'm not... I know this sounds funny, but... You think so? I know so.

But I can make a logical sound argument that he deserves to be in the Basketball Hall of Fame when you look at his career on the whole. because I can't name a bigger global winner. One of the things that was funny about that conversation with Mario Chalmers is that it's as humble as I've ever heard him merely saying that, yes, I should be in the Hall of Fame, because he finally conceded, well, LeBron as of the number six is probably the better player. 15, I'll take that.

I have not heard him say that, though. He generally, LeBron would make fun of Mario Chombers all the time for thinking that he was as good as LeBron. Like that's not a concession Mario Chalmers. I haven't even actually, even though it's obvious, it's not a concession I've heard Mario Chombers make before. I had a private moment with Rio in which I also coined the nickname Rio 5. I pulled them aside. I was like, hey, your second go-around with the heat.

A lot of fanfare, but you never saw the court. I still hold resentment against Spowe. I don't even remember that. Mario Chalmers signed like a 10-day. DMP. And he never got in a game. And he never gave us heat fans that one last Rio bucket. I have no recollection.

of that. Speaking of basketball players, when I talked to Reggie Evans, me and him shook hands, and his hand was like from the tip of my hand to like my elbow. And then I touched him in his back and I was like, Jesus Christ. I don't know how anybody ever got a rebound against. Dude, that guy is solid. It got like a grizzly bear. So you guys are really surprised that a great rebounder in the NBA would be big and strong? He's actually kind of like undersized for how he was. He wasn't that much bigger than I was. I wasn't surprised that Reggie Evans was imposing. I wasn't surprised that Michael Beasley was big or Sean Williams. Lance Stevenson doing that stuff on the wings being one of the more athletic guys.

That was a little surprising to see like his size. But the one that really shocked me the most was I had no idea Mario Charmers was my height. I mean, he's one of the little guys on the court. Well, there are a number of ways and times that people get surprised over my lifetime over the size of people. Peyton Manning and Tom Brady, people are often surprised by how. how big those two people are. This one is funny.

Shaq, it's always surprising to people. And I don't understand how that one is surprising to people, but it's always surprising to people how large Shaquille O'Neal is. Brandon Marshall came through here this week, a giant. I don't know how any cornerback ever covered anything that was happening there. Darren Waller came through here. And I want to actually play a clip, another clip from Darren Waller in the South Beach. session with Darren Waller. For those of you who may not be interested in Darren Waller or even

the dolphins, this is a human being whose journey has been interesting and he's wildly introspective about some of the things that he's had to do in order to keep himself mentally sane. And one of the things that he has had to do is going to be played in a clip here. I urge you, if you really want to know that there's a human being inside of some of those uniforms, Darren Waller in this South Beach session was interesting for a lot of different reasons, but one of the reasons is how he copes with addiction to things and an addictive personality. I saw somebody on TikTok, they put in the term. I guess the term is called raw dogging now.

I guess it used to always just mean like sex with no condom, but now it's like they... No internet. Now it's like having time of your day where they call raw dogging life. So it's like time where it's like I said my, I said a 30 months. man timer and put my phone down, I just sit there. Because like a lot of what my makeup is, is just like the next high, like the next thing, like something to get me out of sitting with things. And so it's like that 30 minute window and just like absolutely nothing.

Not even meditation. It's just still with yourself and be comfortable with yourself even if it's uncomfortable. Do not get distracted. Right. Meditation is outside of that. What are you smiling about, Zaslo? I mean, if I just sat down for three, minutes to a nut, I'd fall asleep.

I mean, how do you stay awake? Just pass out. I'd probably jerk off. I forgot to do the inner monologue button there. I said what I said. That would be great to be. And I stand by it. You'd attach that to me as the inner monologue.

I didn't want to do that to you. No, thank you for your, thank you for your grace and moments of trouble. I'll jump on that grenade. I'll say what everybody. That was everybody's 30 minute monologue. Without internet? Yeah, no internet? Well, that's what I'm saying.

Dude, that's raw-dogging it. Good luck. You got to go back into the bank. Let's go out again to Jeremy to see if there are any updates on the Janus onto Tocombo situation. I've just been trying to figure out three team trades that if the heat don't get Janus, if the Lakers are in on it, maybe LeBron James comes back. But when you're talking about these two trades here, I mentioned before that Tyler

Hero and Andrew Wiggins, if those were the guys that Milwaukee wanted because they wanted to have pieces for next year where they could compete, that helps their young core and they're both movable contracts individually. The Jimmy Butler money is what everybody's talking about. Jimmy Butler coming off an ACL injury for a potential two-month run with another team as $54 million. That's one movable piece is probably going to be tougher to put out in the market than Tyler Hero and Andrew Wiggins because Jimmy Butler didn't have a market before the injury. Now, as an expiring contract, he may for a championship team. But those are two pieces of this conversation.

And the thing we really have to look at as well, everyone keeps coming back to the heat having just two picks available to them. But the heat have several different expiring contracts. They have different movable young pieces. So if they have conversations with Milwaukee about, all right, what's the package that you're looking for? It needs to include four picks and three pick swaps like the Warriors. Okay, which young guys do you want to have as a piece of this going with it?

What money do you want? Do you want the expiring contracts of, say, Terry Rozier and Simone Fontechio? Or do you want the guys you can have for next year in Tyler, Hero, and Andrew Wiggins? Whatever it is that you want, the heat can take that and look at the rest of their roster and try to maneuver for a pick in 2027. Why does that matter? If you get that pick in 2027 and you can convince Charlotte to convey their pick, all of your picks open up

and you have far and away the best package in the NBA for Yanis Haunted Ticumbull. I wonder what Mike does with the other 29 minutes.