The Dana Show with Dana Loesch - Absurd Truth: Biohackers

Episode Date: October 16, 2024

Dana makes fun of people who are into “biohacking” in order to live to 150 years old. Meanwhile, Northwestern University in Illinois tries to bans fat jokes.Please visit our great sponsors:Black Rifle Coffeehttps://blackriflecoffee.com/danaUse code DANA to save 20% on your next order.  Byrnahttps://byrna.com/danaVisit today for 10% off and get the protection you need.  Hillsdalehttps://danaforhillsdale.comClaim your free pocket Constitution today at DanaForHillsdale.comKelTechttps://KelTecWeapons.comInnovation. Performance. Keltec. Learn more at KelTecWeapons.com today.Life360https://life360.comCoordinate family life with Life360.  Use code DANA to get 1 month of the Gold Package FREE.Patriot Mobilehttps://patriotmobile.com/danaGet a free month of service with code Dana.ReadyWise https://readywise.comUse promo code Dana20 to save 20% on any regularly priced item.Relief Factorhttps://relieffactor.comDon’t mask pain, fight it naturally with Relief Factor.  Visit online or call 1-800-4-RELIEF today!Tax Network USAhttps://TNUSA.com/DANADon’t let the IRS control your life—empower yourself with Tax Network USA. Visit TNUSA.com/DANA

Dana Lashes Absurd Truth podcast, sponsored by Keltek. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida man. I just send these headlines. I just don't even know what they're happening. All right.

So for thump, we've got, I don't know where to start. We've got the, a video. I this is crazy do we have this video of so it's a Florida man who's getting arrested it's in southwest Miami Dade and I can't play can we play actually play it are we safe to play it no audio okay no audio if we're gonna be safe and not have any audio okay so it's censored it's censored okay I just hit you again what the fuck to do about it for the first time we are seeing body camera video when Miami Day police say they were assaulted by a quadruple

plegic man. The case so unusual, even a judge at first appearance seems surprised. I have truly never seen a case like this. It happened May 1st. Police were called to the Southwest Miami-Dade home of Brian Amasta. Also known as El Valenti, his stage name when he's performing music. According to the report, Amasa and his mother seen here in red were involved in an argument. But when mom is put in handcuffs, this happens. No, bro, don't do it. Right. Hey, stop hitting me with the chair, Brian.

Stop doing that. Stop doing that. You just said. When we interviewed Amasa back then, he told us this. They claimed that I hit them with my wheelchair. Did you? I absolutely did not. The report stated that you spit at an officer.

Right. So I have, I suffer from massive reflux, so I normally spit. And I spat like the totally different direction. But this is the video. You want to listen and not? A Mastah also told us he felt humiliated. during his arrest. You fucking laughing at me, bro.

Because he was separated from his motorized wheelchair, which he says was damaged when it was put on a flat bed. You see one officer appearing to text someone, joking that they were going to put him on the tow truck. Officers later seen inspecting their legs amassed the charged with two counts of battery on a law enforcement officer. Yeah. So there you go right there.

So that's one Florida man. Yeah, all right. So that's, okay. Good. Yeah, we got that. Glad we got that one in. Oh, my word. A Florida man got revenge on an in-law's neighbor.

The nightmare neighbor cut down his mom's tree, so he caught revenge. It's a British Florida man who apparently got mad over his mother-in-law's neighbor. They cut down a bunch of palm trees that separated their property. And so he formed a privacy hedge. And so they. They, and it was for their pool. What do they call those, the, the little, the lanai? Is it like a lanai?

Is that what it is? Where they have the glastened pool. I don't understand. It's a Florida thing. And so they basically are cutting down all the grain around each other's property. That's what. And there's like different videos. I can't, we can't actually show the, well, we can show part of it.

But don't show the part where they say the blankie neighbor. Got to be careful with that one. So he built a 68, 68 feet of planter box. Boxes. and I guess trying to dare the neighbor into doing something there. So I don't. The planter boxes look great, though. The planar boxes do look great, I have to say.

They look very nice. So I don't know if that was like intentional from the neighbor that cut the trees down or what. But like it ended up looking a lot very nice. So we have this. We also got the Florida man who, uh, I got the, oh gosh, I don't want the people at the adult store. And I really don't want the people who got into, who literally, who literally, who literally, who went to Taco Bell, a husband and wife went to Taco Bell, and then they end up getting into a fight, and they threw the entirety of the contents of the bag of Taco Bell at each other

during the fight, and the woman, because she was seen by police throwing the burrito at her husband's head, was the one who got arrested. It's our friends over at Keltec, the P-15, stands for 15 pews approximately. It's a great American company, Florida-based company, great success story as well. But Keltak, the P-15, the, the P-15. 15 is, it doesn't matter if you're new. It doesn't matter if you're new to shooting like Tim Walls or if you're a seasoned old pro. This is, it's lightweight and powerful. You don't have to compromise stopping power for concealability. And that's what the P15 delivers as two versions. You have a metal frame version and the polymer version. It's a striker fire pistol. Metal frame comes with

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Performance, Keltec. Learn more. Teltecweapons.com. That's K-E-L-T-E-C-Weapons.com. Tell them Dana sent you. Let's all hate somebody together. All of us. Without any kind of question, let's all get out. Let's have some unity. Okay. We got to talk about these biohacking freaks. This is, I mean, I don't know if I want to laugh or, well, I don't know what I want to do. This is so weird. Have you heard about, first off, there was the dude. How old is he's like in his 50s? and he's like, I want to be like as biologically young as my son. Right.

And he like, it sounds like he kind of uses his kid as a guinea pig. He's like, I take my son's blood and I run tests and then I do. And he's like, from what I understand that guy who started this biohacking thing, he, he looks silver. He looks weird. All I can tell is that he grew his hair out, got a ton of Botox, and maybe dipped himself in colloidial silver. I don't know. I don't really notice much of a difference, right? He still looks the same age. Sure, I'll go ahead. If you want to tell me that you think that you're biologically 19, okay, I really don't care. I don't know you. I'm not going to send you flowers when you die.

I don't care. I won't even know when you die. I won't even be notified because we don't know each other. So I don't care. So I just, you know, I do what you want to do in your own life. But now it's a big thing. I've got to, oh, got to talk about this story. So now it's like the new cross. CrossFit. Everybody's biohacking guys. Everybody. And it's starting to be stretched from, here's a freak, rich dude who's like injecting all this weird stuff into him. And now it's like just people eating healthy, just like they're biohacking. Oh my gosh. That's insufferable. So we all agree that people who do CrossFit talk all the damn time about CrossFit, right? And people who are who are keto are like, I'm keto. We know it because they tell us, right? Or people who are like, I love cycling. We know it because they tell us when they're not hogging the road. Anyway, this couple from New York Post, biohacking couple plans to live longer than anyone on the planet. Oh, good for you. Nobody cares. So it's this couple and they're in there, they're doing this profile for the New York Post. And I guess they had a photographer come to their house. I'm going to tell you something.

If your house is all white and it looks like it's been staged, I think you're crazy. I don't trust you. Nobody's house looks like that. Your house should look lived in. Okay? It shouldn't look like a doctor's waiting room. So they're from, they say they're from the Midwest and they want to live longer than anyone on the planet. I'm sure they're very nice.

They're the lenses, right? One of them was a chief revenue officer at a marketing agency. Somebody else founded a talent agency. I don't know. They sound like, well, they sound like your typical couple on house hunters. Well, I make miniature dollhouse furniture. and I do underwater basket weaving. We have a budget of $50 million.

Like, that's what they sound like, right? So they, he, I just need to share this with you. So they were talking about how they got together even. So he started as the biohacker. The guy was the biohacker first, right? They want to live 150 years old. And they spend six figures a year on their quest for longevity. I don't know who likes this world enough to want to live that long, right?

All your friends are dead. You're going to be stuck with Zoomers. I'm sorry, guys, but just saying. So she's like, the wife is like, I've been committed to wellness for years. And when I met my husband in person, he asked her for detailed information about health and biology because he wanted to make sure that they were going to be suitable to each other for over a century. What? So, yeah, that's what they did. He made sure that they all had to pass all the tests.

she had to pass the medical and metaphorical tests according to the independent. The pair follow a strict daily routine. It sounds like there's no fun at all. So they wake up, he wakes up before her, and they both begin their day with pulsed electromagnetic field therapy using the clinical grade device in their home. They follow that up with a workout and a walk to soak up a bit of sunlight as soon as it rises. Then they sit down for an organic homemade breakfast. in the afternoon they try to get more sun and take a cold plunge if the man works from home. Then they use the hyperbaric oxygen chamber and nanoVe, a device that claims to repair everyday cell damage.

And for dinner, because apparently they don't eat lunch, she cooks an organic dinner where she sits down to eat with her husband at 5.30 p.m. They take a long walk through the hills and then they begin their wind-down routine. They do a sauna session and then switch the house to red lights at sunset. They're in bed by 9 p.m. every night. They hope that their strict routine will help them to welcome their first child soon. Well, that's not how that's done. But okay, good for you. They sound like a blast, right?

You want to go have some organic keen one cicadas over at the lenses and sit in their red lights? It wouldn't it be like sitting under them friar lights at a fast food place? I feel like this goes too far. Am I wrong, Cain? Does this go too far? They actually have a cold tub day. The only time I get into cold water is accidentally. There's health benefits to it.

I don't care. I don't want to live to be 150 at all. I have zero interest. Yeah, those are the years where someone else's... Have you looked around and seen stuff? People are wearing high-wasted jeans and they want to afraid him. It's horrible. Have you listened to the music?

Have you seen what they're trying to get you to eat? They're putting all this bug stuff in your food? Who the hell wants to live? to 150. Take me back to the days when grandma used to put the bacon grease in a jar under the sink and everybody drank take me back. I'm just saying,

you don't want to live to 150, do you? Where someone else has to wipe your butt and stuff. Those are the years that I'm not interested in experiencing. I mean, they literally hold their faces up against their, like this wall of red light little bubble lights. It just does not

sound fun. And then all their photos, It's just so weird, dude. It's so weird. I don't know what I think about this. I mean, you do you, but it's annoying. Isn't it? They go end up like Jimmy Carter watching planes fly by. Yeah, they're going to be wheeled out there and watching.

Oh, my gosh. So I had to talk about that because they keep seeing it over and over again. There was another story of this woman who was like, oh, I'm a biohacker and I have 11 grandkids. You're not a biohacker. You just eat healthy, Cynthia. come on that's not biohacking stop it i can't man it's but i'd rather have those people live into 150 than like jimmy carter right data that's so mean partners over at hillsdale college an educational institution that was founded to offer this type of education needed to preserve

civil and religious liberties and that's the mission that they are holding true to still today and over at hillsdale uh you don't have to go to their campus in southern Michigan to take advantage of all the things that they offer. They have all kinds of free resources, whether it's their educational podcasts, whether it is their free speech digest and primus. They're also offering free pocket constitutions. You get it for free. They send it to you for free. You pay nothing. You're not having your information sold either. You just give them your address so they can send it. That's part of their liberty evangelism. I mean, they want to make sure that everyone understands and has copies of our founding documents because they think it's a vital to spreading awareness

about our nation's core values. They were founded in 1844, a small Christian classical liberal arts college, all about pursuing truth and defending liberty. So you can get your free copy of your pocket constitution at Dana4-F-O-R-Hillsdale.com. Fill out the form. They'll mail it to you with free shipping. And if you have one, get one for someone you know who doesn't. This won't last long, so grab your pocket constitution today at Dana4hillsdale.com. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five. So the more content you consume, the worst mental health gets, according to a new study that's out. I believe it.

It's like doom scrolling because people are constantly like comparing themselves to everything else. They said that there was a comprehensive study on social media or on media consumption, period. And they reveal that excessive content consumption can result in feelings of guilt. And the average respondent, well, then stop it. The average respondent says that they have three pangs of guilt. What is this a pang? they have three pangs of guilt a month. And they said on average Americans consume about six hours of content per day.

And they said in World Mental Health Day, that's what, oh my gosh. But just, you know, I think a lot of it is because social media is so curated. It really is. And everybody only sees like the best of what's somebody. Just stop it. Just stop. And honestly, everybody just needs to stop pretending to be perfect on social media, really. DC hotels are nearly sold out for the inauguration even before election day.

So here's my question. Like, if it's a bunch of Democrats and then the Democrat loses, so then what's the recourse? Right? Like, do they all just, like, become available? I'm curious. But they said that all the hotels are sold out for the inauguration already, even before Election Day. Interesting.

So good luck if you're thinking that you want to go and stand in the crowd. It's not going to happen. This is crazy. A woman was decapitated. She jumped to her death in front of horrified wedding guests in Manhattan. Oh, my gosh. They said that this elderly. elderly woman fell to her death from a Manhattan skyrise on in front of horrified wedding guests.

And as her body hit the side of the building on the way down, it knocked her head off. She was 81 years old. This was like a horrific story. Jeez. Yeah. She fell and hit the side of the building and it took her head off as she hit this. It was the Regis apartments in Upper East Side. It was Saturday around 3.30.

And they said she got caught on the railings and balconies on the side of the building and it just knocked her head right off. That, oh, and the arm. The head in the arm. and they literally ended up on the terrace of another apartment while the rest of the body fell down. That's just absolutely horrifying. Oh my gosh. That's like a horror movie death. NASA planes to blast planet killer.

Stop it. Planet killer asteroids with 1,000 strong army of spacecraft or even a nuke. Stop. Let it hit us. Like we can all go to the bunker and all the people that are like voting for Marxists. They can stay out on the Earth's surface and get pummeled. I'm fine with that. They said that it's a race against time.

They're trying to stop dinosaur killing asteroids from wiping out Earth by unleashing a 1,000 spacecraft or even a nuke as a way to do it. Or you could just like call Bruce Willis. You know, Bruce Willis wouldn't handle all this before already, right? Stick with us. We got a lot more on the way. Northwestern universities banned fat jokes. I think it was probably a fat person that did it. They said that making weight-related jokes counts as harassing conduct that may create a hostile environment.

think Northwestern administrators would focus on weightier issues, said a commentator. So Northwestern University in Illinois, via campus reform, has a policy to discipline community members who make weight-related jokes. The restrictive provisions fall under the university's policy on discrimination, harassment, harassment, and sexual misconduct per the daily caller. The policy? Well, you could land in some super hot water if you make a fat joke. according to the policy, quote, Northwestern prohibits discrimination and harassment on the basis of race, color, religion, create national origin, ethnicity, case, sex, pregnancy,

sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, parental status, marriage, age, disability, citizenship status, veteran status, genetic information, reproductive health, decision making, height, weight, or any other classification protected by law, per the policy. It's a lot. I fell asleep towards the middle there. What are you talking about? I like the life, forgot the last things I said. They said that displays of electronic or electronic transmission of derogatory, demeaning, or hostile materials related to one or more of the actual or perceived protect. What if you identify as fat and you're thin and then you want to be offended? Are you protected? You identify.

Who are you to argue? You know, they're weight fluid. Who are you to argue whether or not somebody identifies as such? The disciplinary measures could range from verbal or expulsion. Professors could lose their tenure. Ooh. Ooh. They had campus reform reported that there was a course at another university called the F word,

examining the science, culture, and politics of fatness. So they don't like the word fat. So you can't make fat jokes. You can't make any jokes. You can't, none of it. Oh my gosh. These are, these are rules for kindergartners, not for adults. But it feels like we've been through this before.

Yeah. Is this another wave of it? Yeah. Because back then, I just thought, just call them Gigi's, which is greater gravity. Oh, yes, they are. You know what? They're, it's unfair. They have an oversized command of gravity.

That's actually unfair. It's a positive spin, and you're not saying fatty or anything like that. It's just greater gravity. They're just GGs. Gravity hijackers. What to do when your neighbor commands more gravity than you? I am gravity deprived. They, I mean, it's, they, I mean, they're doing these classes.

Like, they have a class in New Mexico at their University of New Mexico and Albuquerque, where they, they don't call it that, but it's basically, it literally, like a fat studies class and students are required to put together a plus-sized outfit for some reason and consider anti-fatness as another form of oppression. I don't even know what anti-fatness means. There's like a whole thing. Oh, yeah. The whole industry that's on anti-fatness.

Fat liberationist movements. Is that a thing? That's how they justify giving you like these hydrogenated oils instead of butter. I thought that was just like the ice cream truck. the fat liberationist movement. I have an idea. I do too. Can I, can I,

here's one of the assignments that they have. This is one of the assignments that they have at the fat class in the New Mexico thing. Quote, For this assignment, you will be online shopping. You will put, so lazy. We need the exercise. Go out to the mall. You will put together two outfits for the same occasion.

of your choosing. One will be a straight-sized outfit and the other will be a plus-sized outfit. Then you're going to reflect on the experiences of shopping for straight-sized clothing versus shopping for plus size. Well, my first initial thought was that one, the underwear comes on hangers and the other doesn't. The second thing was, why? Who cares? Why is this a thing? Are you supposed to be, Are you supposed to feel bad over the other people's choices? Or why is this a class? How does this benefit society? How does this make the economy stronger?

How does this make us more energy independent? How does it help our supply chain issues where it contains the ingredients for antibiotics? How does this help us build more refineries? How does this help contribute to greater stabilization with regard to foreign policy? How does it do any of that? How does it help make us more energy independent? Oh, it doesn't. This is like the stuff that crumbling societies teach.

This is stuff that you find in rotting, decayed empires. This is how empires die when they start doing this kind of stupid stuff. I just, I don't know. What did you say? Say it. Say this, Kane. Instead of fat, we just used the name, people who were fooled by a government food pyramid. I think that's more accurate.

Pfeiguff. Piffigiff. Piffigiff. Sounds right. Yeah, because the food pyramid will be. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast.