The Dana Show with Dana Loesch - Absurd Truth: Bread & Circus

Episode Date: August 1, 2024

Italian women’s boxer Angela Carini emotionally  throws in the towel after getting punched by a trans Algerian male at the Paris Olympics. Meanwhile, Dana shares her traumatic experience running into a screaming, dead cicada.Please visit our great sponsors:Ammo Squaredhttps://ammosquared.comEnsure you are prepared for whatever comes your way with ammosquared.comBlack Rifle Coffeehttps://blackriflecoffee.com/danaUse code DANA to save 20% on your next order.  Byrnahttps://byrna.com/danaVisit today for 10% off and get the protection you need.  Goldcohttps://danalikesgold.comGet your free Gold Kit from GoldCo today.Hillsdalehttps://danaforhillsdale.comWatch a portrayal of Thomas Jefferson reflecting on the Declaration of Independence in one of his final letters and get your free commemorative copy of the Declaration of Independence today.KelTechttps://KelTecWeapons.comSign up for the KelTec Insider and be the first to know the latest KelTec news.Patriot Mobilehttps://patriotmobile.com/danaGet a free month of service with code Dana.ReadyWise https://readywise.comUse promo code Dana20 to save 20% on any regularly priced item.

Dana Lashes Absurd Truth podcast, sponsored by Keltec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida man. I am, dude, I don't know. A Florida woman was arrested for drowning her roommate's pet jumping spider in ginger ale. Oh my gosh. Ocola County woman was arrested Monday after she allegedly drowned her roommate's pet spider.

according to Okalusa County Sheriff's office, 43-year-old Ilena Rasmussen admitted that she drowned her roommate's pet jumping spider on in ginger ale at their home and the pet jumping spider

cost $70, the owner could not find its spider or the enclosure. She faces misdemeanor, animal cruelty, and petty theft charges. A spider's an animal or is it an insect?

I don't know. How are you charged over that? Okay, so like what? if it's a weird spider and you don't know if it's poisonous and you smush it and it's not someone's pet. Does that mean? Is there a difference between an animal

and an insect? Am I or does the existence of you wanting to make it a pet completely change the equation? Right. Because I could retroactively like go and get lots of people. Oh my gosh, you killed this bug. I loved it. It was my pet

and like get somebody, you know? I don't know. Right. I don't know. I'm just saying. I just have a lot of questions about this. Like, how far does this go? You know what I mean? Like, when, when, I'm with you, like, and also, isn't it an, isn't it? It's an insect. Right? Yeah. So, so now if you smash a bug by accident or kill a bug, you can have animal cruelty charges. Apparently. Okay. Yeah. This, this checks out. A Florida man threatens victims if they don't refill his Xanax prescription, according to an affidavit. He's behind bars. He threatened to burned down their home and killed him if they did not give him a refill of Xanax. Marion County. Leandro Seipersad. Leandro Seepersad.

So Mr. and Mrs. Mr. Mrs. Seapors, son. Got it. He's super sad now. He was threatening his mom and his stepdad with whom he lives. And he was going to burn their house and I'd kill him both if they don't give him his mom's X supply. And so they call the police.

Deputy arrived. They said they were terrified of him. And so anyway, he was taken into custody. He told his mom to hide my week and keep his money coming. And he said they were all, he told his stepfather that they were, quote, finna die while I'm in prison. Yeah, that's literally a direct quote from the affidavit. I'm not making that up. I swear to you.

A Florida man spent six hours in a swamp to trying to avoid arrest. He was not apparently, he was more scared of the cops than he was the gators, not even getting six hours in a swamp. Oh, they got him. Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office got him, 34-year-old touring. right on an outstanding warrant. Six hours swimming in hiding in the mangroves. I cannot believe he did not get gobbled up by a gator. Sick with us. Third hour on the way.

I agree with Annie Oakley who said, quote, I would like to see every woman know how to handle guns as naturally as they know how to handle babies. Now, I myself regularly conceal carry nine millimeter. Now that said, not every woman is like me, has had the hours of training that I've had or feels comfortable around firearms due to years of use or maybe they're by a gun-free zone. I'd like to change that what I can while encouraging self-defense at the same thing.

time. So this is where Burna comes in. It's kind of like a starter weapon. It's, they make a non-firearm firearm. I like the idea of incredible force sending chemical irritants towards a threat as an additional option for women. And the Burna SD model shoots chemical irritant projectiles, 68 caliber rounds that can deter threats in their tracks up to 50 feet away. I mean, it is hard. Easy target acquisition zero recoil. Burna is legal in all 50 states. There's no background checks, no permits required. It's shipped directly to your door. Gun free isn't applicable to Berna. It's great for wherever guns are banned.

Visit burna.com slash Dana for 10% off. That's B-Y-R-N-A.com slash Dana. But I can tell you one thing that I have not watched one bit of is the bread and circuses. 20-24. Cue the horns, please. We have a horn suction. Bread and circuses. 2024.

The BITLlympics. And because they're being such A-holes, we have to use a copyright-free version of them. Yeah, we can't use the actual bread and ser-I'm not even going to say their crappy name anymore. We can't even use the official Bread and Circus song because the Bread and Circus people are so upset. They were so shamed after they had that chunky smurf. They are so shamed. I'm actually more impressed with this royalty-free version. Bread and Circus

24 Where domestic violence is now an Olympic sport Brought to you by Ozempic And testosterone supplements So a female boxer Did you guys hear about this story? A female boxer She's Italian

She's an actual woman Angela Karini Was facing off against an Algerian opponent named Eman Khalif and within 46 seconds, she threw her helmet onto the floor and yelled, this is unjust. The 25-year-old refused the handshake fell to the canvas, sobbing, and Khalif had previously been banned from another major boxing contest before the Olympics. The IOC defended the decision to allow not one, but two boxers who failed the gender eligibility tests at the 2023 World Championships to compete in Paris. and Maine Caliph of Algeria was won and Lin-Yuting of, well, they say Chinese Taipei,

because it's the only way that they can get Taiwanese, I guess, to participate, were disqualified from the world championships. And the International Boxing Association President said at the time that the DNA test proved that they had X, Y, chromosomes and thus were excluded. Now, the description of Caliph's hitting, and Caliph looks like a dude, the description of Caliph's hitting, I mean, the Italian boxer Angela Carini is no chump. Like she can hold her own. She's a badass. She said the force of the hit was unlike anything she's ever felt in her boxing career. And you could see it well off.

You could see it immediately. And some of the people who were defending Caliph were saying, oh, this is just Corini being a sore loser because, you know, she's outmatched. No, it's a dude, X, Y, chromosomes. Now, some people are trying to argue that, well, Caliph has, you know, female reproductive organs, but has X, Y, chromosomes. I don't believe you. Have you, like, been there and seen it?

Because I totally don't believe a single one of these people. I'm from the show me state in Missouri. That's the show me state. Live in Texas now, but from the show me state. I'm just saying, I don't believe it. Do you believe it? I don't believe any one of these rapassers. I don't believe any of you people.

No. Yeah. They get away too much. We're just saying things that aren't true. So let's call them out. This woman has trained her entire life to get a gold medal in the Olympics. So, yeah, I think stuff like that you need a little. And plus, like I said, Khalif Kaine, as we were talking about on break, I mean, this dude failed.

Previous gender tests. Yeah, that white chromosome. It's pesky. How do you fail a gender qualification? Like, here's my dong or here it's not. You know, I mean, how do you fail that? That's how the tests were back in the day. Well, we didn't have all this technology.

Have you seen, I've not seen that confirmed. They're saying, oh, no, no, no, Khalif is intersex, that she's not trains. And we can't play the video for you, as Juan reminds us, because the bread and circuses, 24, the people who basically, people who glorify a man beating on a woman for Olympic sport will get upset, and they'll ding us for copyright violation on YouTube because they're a bunch of female copulatory organs, even though they allow people who don't have them to participate in women's sports. So. They'll probably ding us for what we've shown on the screen already.

Yeah. We haven't played any audio or anything. They can sit and spend. No, I don't feel like I'm in a good mood today. No, no, thank you. So, Kane, what have you heard about this dude being intersexed? I haven't seen anything that literally anything that. Well, the thing is, I'm about trust, but verify.

Right. That's all it is. Trust, but verify. That's all we need to do. So if I'm the Olympic committee and I'm going as far as to take blood samples and all this other stuff, let's just do the easy thing and just check it out. Yeah. I just don't believe someone go, no, it's, I really have a vagina.

I just don't believe you. I promise. Just don't look. Just don't look, but I have one. I don't believe you. I don't believe you at all, especially when the other person is so totally a dude. It's totally fair for me to fight that woman. Yeah.

How do you question. I can totally fight her because I'm a her. Yeah. I mean, come on. So they said that the, I mean, and she's, for people who say that she's a sore loser, she would beat you to a pulp. She absolutely would. Angela Corini would beat you to death.

So you can't sit here and say that she's some kind of chump or she's not an athlete. This woman has gotten this far, you absolute pig. She's gotten that far. There's like so many of these like idiots on social media, like running her down because there's nothing that leftist love more than seen a woman get knocked around, especially leftist men in Trans-Tifa. But they're like losing it. I mean, this looks like.

like a dude because it's a dude. And again, I don't trust any of these people anymore to you. And I don't think any jury would convict us. What, Kane? You had a look on your face. She's an elizabeth. Well, she's a guy. That's why. He gets these looks where he's like, he's bad. I can tell he has a thought and he's very satisfied with himself. Excuse me. It's ma'am. It is ma'am. I mean, that's like the same thing, you know. So I don't know. I, I, I, this. This. This. These are one of the reasons I just haven't been interested in watching bread and circus, the 2024 bread and circus. I just, I haven't. I felt so bad for this.

I felt so bad for Karini. I felt so bad for her. Steve, you're like a sports dude. Are we being mean? Be honest. Because I just don't, I don't trust any of these people anymore. And you have an X, Y chromosome. You got tons of, like, dude chemicals in your body.

You got tons of testosterone. Your muscle mass is different. Your bone density is different. I just, you know, I kind of need to see some stuff. You know what I mean? I mean, isn't it a whole thing about the Olympics to be fair? I mean, they're not very fair or equal in any of this. Yes, you are correct, sir.

You are correct, sir. It's why the 200-pound weight class doesn't fight the 135-pound weight class. It's kind of the same thing. Yeah, well, I'm 235 pounds. I identify as a welterweight. No, that's not how it works. No, that's not how it works, man. Feather weight.

I'm a featherweight. No, you're not a featherweight. You're 235. Oh, I'm in the, I identify. It's featherway. That's not how any of that works. The same thing. Same thing with this.

You got some beach ball size lady nuts on you coming in all kamikaze like that. See? I mean, and that's what we're talking about. You can have those beach ball size. You know what's going up into the ring and fighting a chick. I mean, this is, I don't know. You know what? They need to replace one of the rings in their bread and circuses logo,

which is the black eye. A woman's black eye, because that's, you know, what they're, I can't stand these people. I can't. The folks over at Keltec, the P-15 is an awesome, awesome pistol. It's absolutely, it's like an all-around. I mean, it's something that you definitely need to have in your collection. Sleak, compact, 15-round capacity, lightweight, and powerful. And there's the metal frame version.

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Bring the P-15 to the range today and tell them Dana sent you. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick-Five. Hospitals are warning of a critical blood shortage and urgent need for donations as a cyber attack wreaked havoc on one blood supply. They sure wasn't vampires? I was wondering. They said that one blood was urging people to donate blood. It was a ransomware attack that affected their ability to distribute life-saving donations.

And it's unclear if it caused any kind of like data leak of personal information or anything like that. But they got a lot of locations across Florida, Georgia, and the Carolinas. It's an Orlando-based entity. So, hmm. The, a man died of fear. He died of fear from a freak wasp attack. Oh my gosh. Remind me, Kane, after break, to tell you of my cicada story.

So this Ukrainian man literally had a heart attack after he was chased by wasps on a beach in southern Ukraine or no sorry southern Italy according to local media. The 47 year old he wasn't identified. He was an engineer. He's traveled Europe for work. He was on holiday in Calabria. And apparently he's allergic to be in wasp stings and he starts running because he apparently got near, I guess, a was nest and some kind of vegetation. And they went crazy and he was. and they thought it was anaphylactic shock but it wasn't he like legit had he wouldn't even

stung he just scared himself to death can you imagine that's golly that's horrible cops is back the show the best show ever it's back and it's filming in pierce county washington oh it's so cool so kro channel seven says they have a uh that they've allowed them to film them. They're going to, the cops crew is going to ride with the deputy for a couple of days in a row decide what to keep, what to air, all of that. And they said that there's not an exchange of money. The department isn't

liable for anything to airs. They got, you know, all that stuff. But that's kind of cool. I mean, you really see how like much garbage cops have to deal with. That's how I learned. I watched cops. It was every Friday night. There's another Friday night I was on. It's like, oh, you hear the opening line from

UV40 and you're like, oh, it's cops. And you've got to come running in a living room. because, you know, you didn't have TiVo back then. You couldn't pause. Was it inner circle? Not UB40? Inner Circle. Yeah, you heard like the first.

You knew it. You're like, whoa, it's cops. And you got to run in and watch it. So, yay, I can't wait when it, I don't have an air day for you. Taco Bell's rolling out an AI drive-through. Are they going to remember to give me my mild sauce? Yeah. No, if I'm going to do hot sauce, I'm going to do a different hot sauce.

I'm going to do Taco Bell's hot sauce. I'm going to do actual hot sauce. But, like, sometimes I just want some seasoning on it. Right? So I'll put that mild sauce on it because it has like, I like the spices in it. I'll have like a seasoning. But if I'm going to do hot sauce on it, no, I'm going to do like an actual adult hot sauce. We're not going to do none of that packet stuff. Anyway, they got AI drive-thru ordering in hundreds of locations by the end of the year. An American woman was found chain to a tree and left to die in the Indian jungle. She'd been there for 40 days. A local shepherd hurt her shouts and saved her. She was like entirely emaciated. Apparently her husband.

Her husband. Somebody find him and beat him with that chain. Stick with us. We got a lot more in store, and I'll tell you my cicada story. Vince's stick is talking about guns. I guarantee you he can't shoot fessons like I can. And that's a part of saying, but you know what? I guarantee I don't want weapons of war in classrooms, and there's no reason that you can't have reasonable restrictions around that without infringing on your Second Amendment. Oh, you know, I don't shoot fizzins like I care.

What? That's the guy that said yesterday that one man's socialism is another man's neighborliness? He is a barely sentient turd, isn't he? That's Tim Woles. He's acting like, nobody can shoot peasants like, I can't. That guy. I can't. I have nothing nice to say, peasants.

Did he say peasants? Yeah. Peasants. Yeah, I'm sure he probably meant peasants. Fessence was just, yeah, a verbal typo from him. Welcome back, bottom of the second hour. Like, are you going to have a pheasant off? Is that what you're going to do?

I don't want weapons of war in the clathroom. I don't want weapons of war. What do you mean weapons of war? Fudd? What are you talking about? Anybody believes that Fudd actually shoots pheasants? I got an idea. Yeah.

Let's see you can kill more birds. I mean I can kill more birds than you. And if I can kill more birds than you, that means I know what weapons of war is. Oh my gosh, this guy. Tim Wals. I'm not going to stop making fun of him now forever. He's on my radar.

Yeah, what did he say? What did he see yesterday? Yesterday, he said that one man's socialism is another man's neighbor. I don't think he knows what socialism that means. Or neighborliness for that matter. I love how these people can just go on TV and say words, random words. Don't know what the hell they mean, but words. And no one calls them to account for any of it.

So he got mad about, I don't know, he got mad about J.D. Vance about something with guns. And then he started going off about whether, guess what, Fudd, there's no weapons of war in the classroom. By the way, I just, I happened to notice that Tim Walley. and other people, they celebrated Independence Day last month, right? July 4th, a holiday brought to you by free people with weapons of war because this country is founded and freed with weapons of war. So I just want to be able to own whatever my government gives the Taliban. That's all I'm saying. I just want to be able, I feel like Sally from the peanuts. I just want what is coming to me. I just want to be able to own the same weapons that they give the cartels. That's all I'm saying. You know. Hey, tell you my cicadas story real quick, just as a palate cleanser. Yeah, I definitely want to hear this. Okay, so my favorite sound in the world.

No, it's not babies' laughter. It's cicadas. That's your favorite in the world? Favorite in the world. Of all sounds that exist. Of all the sounds, it's cicadas. Okay. Because it makes me think of being out, like, rural Missouri in the summer.

You know, in the creek, or sorry, sorry, grandma and grandpa, the crick. It's literally what they said. No idea. But, you know, catching tab holes and cradads and, you know, all that stuff and being out in the woods because I love being outside. And, you know, being out and riding, you know, my, so I had a mini three-wheeler, sorry, wheeler, A-T-V. And I say, Warsh, say it again, warsh. So I have to check myself sometimes. Three-willers, you know, W-I-L-A-R-S, four-wheelers.

Sounds weird to say it like that, ATVs. and just being out at dusk and, you know, just fireflies, which I don't see anymore. And just that's what it makes me think of. It makes me think of summer and it makes me think of being in the woods and it's just, I love it. It's the most relaxing thing. It relaxes me more than like thunderstorms hearing that and hearing the rain, all that stupid stuff. I don't like seeing them, though, the cicadas. Because they are terrifying.

No bugs should be that big. And they are terrified and terrifying. So normally I just, because you know, all the cicadas are out right now and right in Texas, it's not as bad like, Kane, it's not as bad here as it wasn't like a Missouri in Illinois. Right. I agree with that. But we, and isn't it, aren't they here a little later than they were in Missouri in that too? Yeah, just slightly only because I think it's just a weather thing.

So I've been seeing them. You guys know I got a rescue pup name Wick, right? And he's, he's a pup. He's a little over four months old. and he's now going out without his leash and, you know, he's used to the yard and all that stuff. And it was like the first morning that we went out without him having a leash. And in the morning when you go out, you know, you're bound to find a couple of these dead cicadas. And they're weird.

They're so weird. It looks like a prehistoric trick. It doesn't, it looks like a joke. Like somebody put a prop on the ground for you to freak out over because it doesn't look like a real bug. It's just like, what's the point? You know, like, why are you like this? So anyway, I saw one that was on the ground and I didn't want WIC to get it. So I was going to kick it out of the way, which I did.

But that little jack wagon wasn't dead, not WIC, but the cicada. The cicada began screaming. I mean, I can't even be as loud as the cicada was. Not only did it lose its mind and was screaming its head off like some trans Tifa activist, but it flew right at my face and I was freaking out Wick freaked out we were all freaking out

and then and then somehow another one was right there losing its ever loving mind with its little bug arms legs whatever and freaking out and flew also at my face and this is why I don't like things that can hop or fly at my face like that

you know the bugs and the crickets I hate crickets and spiders because bugs should not be able to jump that high it's messed up everything else I'm okay with snakes I can get you know that I don't care but man alive and I think I saw its eyes it like was right in my it was terrifying and I'm like hitting it and I oh and they're weird and they're just oh so anyway it was like I don't know seven something in the morning screaming my head off sure my neighbors enjoyed it on a nice

Saturday morning just screaming my ever-leven head off and my backyard another day at the lash funny farm you know and because these stupid cicadas and they were so loud, though I don't know who was louder, the cicada or me. And we made kind of a similar sound. It was really weird. And Wick had no idea what was going on. He was like, I thought this was a toy and it's not. And he

just was terrified of them. Oh, but they're so gross. They're so gross. They're like jumbo chito size. Then they scream and they're grody looking. Why do we have them? There's certain things. I'm like, why did God put you here? Like mosquitoes. Why? Like flies.

What do they do? Cicatas? Why are you here? You're, you know, Green Day. Like, why? So, I don't know. But that, that's my cicada story. That last one. I don't know why Green Day is around. I mean, I like the sound of the cicada screaming more than I like them, but, you know, yeah. So that's, anyway, that's, maybe Tim Walts can come down here and do some cicada hunting. Wabins War and a class. Because what is he even on about? Is he like trying to run for, is he trying to kiss Kamala Harris's but so he can be a VP contender. Because he legit looks like Elmer.

He looks like Fudd. He looks like Elmer Fudd. He does. I mean, Reddeter's out there. I don't know how you don't put an orange hat on every single thing that is put, that everything he puts out. I don't know how he doesn't even have like a transposed orange hat.

Very quiet. Oh my God. We're on fathenth with weapons of war. My gosh, this guy is so goofbally. So I don't, I don't know. I, um, I, um, I am entertained by him greatly. He's,

but I think he would be, he's, he, like, nobody really heard from him, Tim Walts. And then all of a sudden he's like, right there. And there he's me, Tim Walt. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast.