The Dana Show with Dana Loesch - Absurd Truth: Dump Button

Episode Date: January 26, 2024

Dana’s producer Steve had a rough day with the radio dump button after our guests dropped too many expletives Thursday. Meanwhile, Biden’s speech in Wisconsin was full of old man moments. Please visit our great sponsors:Black Rifle Coffeehttps://blackriflecoffee.com/danaJoin the Coffee Club today and get 30% off your first month’s subscription.Hillsdale Collegehttps://danaforhillsdale.comVisit today to hear a Constitution Minute and reserve your free pocket copy of the Constitution.KelTechttps://KelTecWeapons.comSign up for the KelTec Insider and be the first to know the latest KelTec news.Nimi Skincarehttps://nimiskincare.comDon’t compromise. Use promo code DANA for 10% your order.Patriot Mobilehttps://patriotmobile.com/danaGet free activation with code Dana.Wise Food Storagehttps://preparewithdana.comSave $50 on your 4-Week Survival Food Kit plus free shipping when you order today!

Dana Lash's absurd truth podcast, sponsored by Keltec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. All right, well, we're getting Florida Man up here. Sometimes the Wi-Fi can be pretty sketchy here in this. All right, so first up, got a couple of things here. First up for Florida Man. This, I don't understand the whole issue of stealing.

used cooking oil? Like, how is that a thing? But apparently it is. This is coming, Channel 25. I want to make sure I got right. A Miami man was arrested Tuesday of this week. He was accused of trying to steal, like, actual, like, used cooking oil from restaurants. I did not know, and the chief deputy said at the time, that it is a $5 billion business to recycle used cooking oil. Wait, why is it? Okay. What? Why? Because it's a biodiesel fuel.

People can turn this used cooking oil into like a diesel fuel. Interesting. And so the recycling of that is like that much. And I'm sure that there's other, you know, products. Okay, second question, why are we not in this business? Yeah, no kidding. Like for real. I'm just, I can come up with a bunch of used cooking oil.

I just don't know it after that. Yeah. But I didn't know like people would stay. Like, wouldn't most people just like give it away? Or no. I guess not. Back in the day they did, yeah. So they said that their restaurants used, they sell it to,

recycling companies and then they turned the oil into fuel. But they said that it can go check this out for 65 cents a pound on the black market. 65 cents a pound on the black market. So this dude, he stopped at 20 restaurants on the federal highway in Stewart. And he had tons of stuff, tons of stuff. This woman, Florida woman, was so drunk in the school pickup line in Pinellas County. She fell asleep. She passed out behind the wheel of her car while she was picking up kids.

in the school pickup line. A Largo woman. She's facing charges of drunk driving and child neglect. They found her asleep, and she smelled a hooch. Smelled like liquor. Oh my gosh. So they said, yeah, that she was taken into custody. That's scary.

That's scary. I am not reading this story. I am not reading this one. I'm just going to say, quick headline, Florida man accused in fatal triple shooting after trying to date his own daughter. That's all I'm saying. We were at the Caltech booth yesterday and got to see a lot of people's reaction to the Gen 3 that they have. And I've called it Gun Origami.

And they're like, yeah, that's actually correct. I mean, that's like as close to it as you could get. The cool thing about it is it's 9mm sub 2K, Gen 3. It's shipping now. And you don't have to detach your favorite optics anymore if you're going to fold it in half. The whole thing folds in half. Now, previously you'd have to take your optics off all. that. Now you don't. It's simple twist and fold motion. It's a patent pending rotating 4N.

And so either direction at twist and you can fold it in half just as easy as you deploy it. You can quickly, you know, pack it up. It's optics and everything. It stays on. It's awesome. And that's just one of the upgrades that they've made to this Gen 3 version of the sub 2K that's pushed it over the top. They got an upgraded aluminum trigger, redesigned trigger mechanics. You got a light and five-pound trigger pool. The updated trigger also makes for more precise feedback. They have upgraded action. They got a new chamber indicator. And this one ships in Glock 19 configuration, so it also takes magazines from the Glock 17.

It's just awesome. Made right here in the U.S. of a family-owned Florida-based company. To learn more about the sub-2K Gen 3, visit Keltukweapons.com. That's K-E-L-T-E-C Weapons.com. Tell them, Dana sent you. We've been broadcasting in Vegas at Shot Shots our last day here. And I've had some interesting guests on. And I

You could tell people who work And speak for a living And people who don't And it's funny Because the people who speak for a living They know what they can say And can say when there's a microphone in front of them And the people who don't

Who do stuff And they're involved in other things They don't care And poor little Steve Poor little Steve They're in D.C. So we have this thing called A Dump button, right?

So when we're doing a live broadcast If somebody says something saucy Which we know you're not supposed to do But if we have a guest on and they say something a little saucy. You know, one of those words you can't say as per George Carlin on air. Then he's got to hit the dump button. And I don't understand how the whole powering up thing works

because apparently you hit it and then it's got to power up again like a death ray. No, it builds a delay. Okay. So there's microseconds right now that's being built into a delay so that whenever he does hit the dump button, it shrinks that time in the middle there, from what's real time to delayed time. It's like time travel.

So that, yeah, exactly, kind of. Well, he about lost five years of his life twice this week because we had one guest who was blank, blank, blankety blank. And we're like, you can't do that. Kane's even like, don't be dropping this on the air. Don't be saying this stuff on the air. Like even before. We did it before they even went on the air.

Kane smiles and he's like, oh, well, go ahead. Don't be saying the stuff on the air. Like, it was like, he went into fool, Mr. T. Don't be saying the stuff in the air. Yeah, so it's like, you know, they knew. But anyway, they, like, we had a couple instances. And I swear I could hear Steve sweat. I could hear him sweat all the way here in Vegas.

He's on the way and you can remember. There's a split second we're like, oh man, we heard that. He is perspiring right now. It's like this so bad. And he just like lost five years off his life. And somehow, miraculously, he dumped it all every single time. No, he didn't. He did.

He did. He dumped all of it. Yeah, what are you talking about. Shush up. I don't know what I was thinking. Snitches get stitches. It's a matter with you. So, you know, nobody. Nobody Radio America said nothing to him.

Like, he didn't, he's a dude, so he didn't get no flowers or nothing like that, you know, or bath bombs or something, you know. He's a dude, you know, dudes are just different. But we're like, you know, he should get something. He should get, you know, an award, a major award, right? Because, you know, so we got a couple little things here. Let's, you know, let's, let's recognize him. I think it's important to recognize our associate producer of the Dana Show, Mr. Stephen

Steve Jones. Not only does Steve have to suffer behind the microphone and monitor every word from every guest just to make sure that if a curse word is released, he can hit that magical dump button. Dump button. And eliminate that word and some other important words, unfortunately. And then get the heart rate back to normal. Normal. Most people do not experience the suffering that our associate producer, Steve Jones, experiences with every guest, and especially the ones that are known to get a little saucy. Dropping F-bombs.

So today, we recognize our associate producer, Steve Jones, for the Dana Show. Aplaz. Sir, congratulations. Without you. We could not deliver such high-quality programming for the earholes of all our listeners. Thank you, Steve Jones. Fireworks. And thank you.

Trofies. Radio America. Eagles cheering. Steve. And seen. That's a radio. Whatever the hell they get for that. That got it.

Kay made a speech and he was released. ear holes in the same speech. Take notes. And guess what? You're welcome. And I didn't dump either of them. You're welcome, dude. You're welcome.

You're welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. Amazing. Now you can go clip that out and put it up in your cubicle. Oh, thank you. You're welcome. So, I'm just like some new trophy.

Yeah. So I hope. The guest today, we're not going to expect to get any curse words from Daryl Issa. No, I don't think Darrell Issa has joints. No. I think he's just one tall, stiff dude. And he comes in. He walks like a flat,

Stanley and he just sits you know how like Barbie couldn't bend her knees for a long time right like he just sits and his legs stick out straight so I'm not guessing yeah he's yeah he's yeah he's no not him the ATF whistleblower now I don't know no but he's aware dude this guy he's aware I don't know this guy but he is you know he's the whistleblower in the fast and furious situation and he knows a mic though ATF guys I know some ATF guys yeah but they know those mics and it's like something kicks in and they're like I know I can't say these things on this mark on this mark on I probably know where they Well, I got practice now, so I'm not. If for any godly reason, he feels the need to do it.

Oh, Kane's going to Mr. T.M. These hands are warmed up. Steve, like, went in and stretched. He's our own little Michael Sarah there in DC. He went and stretched. It got ready to hit that button. Were you just staring at it, dude? Were you just looking at it and going, hurry up, hurry up.

Store those seconds. Yeah. So for the inside baseball, folks, I have a screen, a little, like, widget on this little panel I have that says 30 seconds. And when the first F-bomb dropped, it drops to zero, because everybody hears us on a 30-second delay. So when it goes to- A whole 30 seconds? Yeah.

So it goes to zero. 30 seconds. I don't know. We have engineers. But it starts to build, but it takes about five minutes to get those 30 seconds back. So by the time the next one was dropped, I had like 1.3 seconds of time to get back to the dumb button, quick. So it only has what I had built back up.

So within that time, I nailed it each time. Yeah. every single time so wait five minutes 30 seconds it seems slightly unfair if it went it is or else yeah yeah you're gonna sound really weird if it went faster it would time stretch the audio and you would sound really robotic time stretch what in the world this is like some doctor who stuff

it would sound noticeably like you're talking faster and then a little piti or a little bit more my gosh oh my gosh like it wouldn't be it wouldn't sound normal Ben's a friend so go and tell him I don't care No, it's true. Yeah, I, I, well, we'll tell him. We'll tell Mr. ATF whistleblower. Like, hey, we know you blew the whistle on the ATF and you got all the shady stuff like out in the open, but don't you be dropping no F bombs?

These American radio, do you think this is Mexican radio? You can't do that stuff here. The only F words I want to hear are fast and furious. That's right. Oh! That's it. Oh, and the crowd goes wild. The crowd.

All right. So we had to acknowledge it. I hope that, I hope the, I hope the folks at Radio America, I hope they come in and give you a pat on the back. Right. Mike Paradiso. Something. Go and give him a pat on a back pat. I need to appreciate you, buddy.

Backpad, back pat. He needs one. He deserves it. Like I said, we're here in Vegas, Shachow. And we got, there's, it's all kinds of, they had, what is it, the guy who's Kane, who's Glenn Jacobs. He's the mayor of Knoxville County. He was, he was here yesterday.

And then I saw Bronstrom in yesterday. there's the folks who do cryptech there was an event saw him yesterday super nice guys and everybody I mean it's just it's a it's a nice event that they have every single year so we come out and today's our last day broadcasting here

as you said as you know so we've been covering everything one thing we haven't heard a lot about from anybody is any of the RNC stuff I don't think people care about R&C drama except nerds like us and I care about RNC drama because I think there's a bunch of jackwagons about ready to foobar a whole bunch of things up got all these

broke parties. Now they said that they're leaning towards Trump being the presumptive nominee. And to his credit, Trump came out was like, we're going to do this the old-fashioned way. And, you know, I think he just saw that there was, and there are still people. Look, here's one of the things you got, you got to realize that not everyone is as strategic or as Machiavelli as we might be. Like I said, if I, I, I love dogs, but if I got to run you over and your family and your dog and your sister and whatever to win in 24, like I will, right? You know, it's going to happen. I'll be coming with my giant steamroller, and, you know, I'm not even going to honk as a courtesy. But there are people who, you know, they need, they give them a beat, right?

Give them a minute to get over stuff and let things play out and let them come to, you know, it doesn't have to be so damn tribal. I always hate that. It's like, you want to win. You got to go to war with the soldiers you got. You got to inch towards however you want to, you got to try to take ground and not give it up. And so just before you turn people away, because I'm going to tell you, I see folks out there who are like, okay, well, if you, then you can't be on the Maga Train. Oh my gosh, there's no damn train. Stop it.

People are voting and you want to win in 24. No one elected you, the king blank of Blank Mountain. There are no bouncers. There's none of that stuff. Shush, you're going to need every single one of those people if you want to win in 2024. So y'all be making some friends instead of making some frenemies. Think about it like that. You want to win because you're going to need them.

You're going to need them. You're going to need everyone. We don't got no time for that. All right. So I'm going to be following all the latest too with the border stuff. I feel like I want to get some razor wire and go down and put it up down there. We got some friends down there in our McCallin area. Exactly.

I'm saying. So we got a lot of stuff to get up, including, do you want me to read this here before we go? Do you want me to go? This is the, yeah, okay. So we got, I have to share this with you because I thought it was funny. You know how you got the AI stuff? I don't like it. I stole this from the Internet.

I didn't write this. A. I did. And it's called USA Gun Poem. And the prompt is, write a poem in the style of Dr. Seuss about what would happen if the government of the United States sent its military to fight civilians. Are you ready?

Okay. Here we go. I'm just going to say, you should just give them a little bit and then get the rest on Twitter or something. Okay. Now, shooty, shooty, pew, pew, pew, pew. Let's all learn what guns can do. Liberals in the USA.

loved to nod their heads and say, You bought your guns from a store. You can't fight a civil war. Fight the army, you will lose. They have jets and tanks to use. That's not where the story ends. They have homes and kids and friends. Tyrants threaten you with bombs.

Just remember, they have moms. You can't live inside your jet. Can we find you? Yes, you bet. You'd send soldiers and Marines. Up against AR-15s? They're outnumbered 10 to 1. That is why I need a gun.

Don't forget, because it's true, government is scared of you. It's funny. It's super funny. It's all in good fun. Everybody on Clench. All right, we got more on the way. Hi, I'm Adriana, a politics major at Hillsdale College. Here's Hillsdale President, Dr. Larry Arne, with a Constitution Minute.

America's founders recognized an obvious fact of life. Human beings differ in terms of physical attributes and talents. Because of this, some people will be better. at some things than they are at others. But they also recognize that the tall and the short among us, the swift and the slow among us, are still human beings if we are recognizable as human beings, and therefore we are equal in terms of the rights that pertain to human beings,

rights attached to human nature, rights that come from God. The Declaration of Independence names three of the big ones, life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Exercising these rights is necessary if we are to be truly free. In our own time, many influential people believe that only God, government can decide what our rights should be. This is dangerous. Understanding our rights and how the Constitution protects them is vital to our freedom. To learn more and get a free pocket constitution, visit constitutionminute.com. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's

time for Dana's Quick Five. All right, so first up, the average American has $65,100 in their savings account. Yeah, I'm calling shenanigans. I'm calling shenanigans. I'm Colin, Shanana. That's the average American? Yeah. That's a lie. A dang lie. Nobody believes this.

It comes from finance. I'm not even going to deep dive into it because no. No. So apparently the Amazon ring, they're not going to share their videos anymore. So they're not going to share their give the cops all the ring videos they want policy. That was the, yeah. That was kind of it. Yeah.

You're right. They, uh, they're, uh, they're, I didn't even know. that they like just were pretty much like, yeah, whatever you guys need, we're here. But they, they did. I mean, I thought you, you know, you just like, here's a warrant, you know, but no, no, that's really not how it weren't. But they said that they're going to stop that so that people feel a little bit better about the privacy and safety and all that kind of stuff. I mean, I don't, the only thing that mine would see that my doorbell camera or all our cameras around is like me yelling at squirrels or trying to talk to wildlife or something like that, you know, trying to chase the geese that come and into my yard.

Just, you know, that's pretty much all I would get. And I'm trying to catch them and be like, what if I build you a pond? Does I run after them and they run away? I am the only person that would scare geese. You know, I hear like, oh, don't make that goose mad.

It'll come get you. No, no, no. The geese are like, that woman's nuts. Run. Ramp, run. That's not like a duck, though, didn't it? It'll be, okay. South Korea warns against the social media

trend of eating fried toothpicks. Fried what? Toothpicks. They look like vegetable straws. So you know what? You just eat the vegetable straw. Don't eat a toothpick that's been fried. Literally just, yeah, just, it's, that's nasty and ow.

Are things that bad economically? You're eating fried toothpicks? I don't know. I don't know what that, no. I like this headline because it just seems like we're, there's more to meet than meets the eye here. A man is dead after an experiment with explosives. and Garvin County. Yeah, like, you know, when you experiment with explosives, you know, it can go wrong.

They said there was an explosion that happened Wednesday in a home near Leighton, according to Channel 16 ABC in Pennsylvania. It was an apparent explosion. He was experimenting with explosives, and it caused an accidental blast and killed him. Oh, and he lived alone with his dog. Oh, I hope his dog's okay, and someone nice has it. That's so bad. Yeah, don't, why would you do that? Don't do that.

A Hampton's Mansion. Kana, Hampton's Mansion once listed for $150 million, only sells for $90 million. How will they ever make it? How will they live? Oh, my gosh. Is it Barack Obama's Hampton Mansion? You know, the one that he bought after he was telling everybody

that the sea levels were going to rise and, you know, all that stuff? I just, you know, care. But anyway, yeah, so I don't really care. Beer, brood here, it is used to make the brew. bearded. It's fine. Oh, Earthrider. Thanks for the Great Lakes. I wonder what it's right. What the hell? The brer-bure

beard here. Do you beer brew? Dude, do you beer brew? I know you can brew beer, but can you beer brew? I mean, the brew beard here. I mean, it's great beard brew here, bro. That's Joe Biden.

You can hear him, and if you've never ever had alcohol, that's what it feels like. That's it. back to the show. Dana Lash here with you. It's the bear beard hair, bro. Bird. It's brew beard.

It's like blah blah blah blah blah blah. It's like my rest of development. Oh my gosh. Where was he at? He's in Wisconsin. He's just nuts. Listen, audio sum by 10. Is this the brew beard here?

Is this what he's talking about? He got real mad all of a sudden. He said just working. Two, sorry, two. Not 10. That's Newsome. I don't want to hear him. He costs 10 bucks to make it.

10 bucks to make it. What? What? Is that it cost 10 bucks to make the brew beard there, bro? It's kind of expensive. What is it, some IPA? I don't even know, man. You know what IPA stands for?

No, what? Bitter sludge. What? Who said that? You're not wrong. There's a bug in the system. So, I don't know. Man, this, this, I mean, we have some crazy sound bites from him.

Like, for instance, So do you have somebody's six. This is a, you know, classic stage whispering. And thanks to the outstanding senators, Tammy Baldwin of Wisconsin. Tammy Brown. And Amy Klobuchar and Tina Smith from the state of Minnesota. If I have all three of them on my side, I don't worry about anything. Hey, um, have you heard of Infrasherstressure, Suresher.

Of what? In, In Frasher, Rish, Risher. I have not. Well, apparently, I guess you don't know. your government cane audio sound bite five. I'm proud to announce one billion dollars from the bipartisan infrastructure

all will be... This is a law. You know how sometimes Dean Martin would pretend to be drunk and then he would sing and it would sound super snazzy? It was like he was trying to pull that off in a speech. Joe Biden was and it didn't work. So he says that he's going to, it's like just some Dr. Evil stuff.

One billion from the bipartisan infrastructure law. What? Or a Burl Ives singing holly jolly christmas he just like gave up and when he's like holly july christmas subifying somebody infrastructure law what survive harrison's infrastructure law what dude's your deal you cannot tell me this dude has not had a stroke for real come on thanks for tuning in to today's edition of dana lash's absurd truth podcast if you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on apple podcast Spotify or wherever

you get your podcast.