The Dana Show with Dana Loesch - Absurd Truth: Ecclesiastics

Episode Date: September 26, 2024

Kamala Harris refers to Old Testament scripture, Ecclesiastes, as Ecclesiastics. After Kamala Harris’ gaffe of the Bible book, we decide to create a fake punk name through AI and see the results. Meanwhile, police in Switzerland make multiple arrests after a after woman dies in a 'suicide pod'.Please visit our great sponsors:Black Rifle Coffeehttps://blackriflecoffee.com/danaUse code DANA to save 20% on your next order.  Byrnahttps://byrna.com/danaVisit today for 10% off and get the protection you need.  Cozy Earthhttps://cozyearth.com/danaGet the ultimate in comfort at up to 40% off with code DANA. Hillsdalehttps://danaforhillsdale.comVisit DanaForHillsdale.com to pick your new favorite podcast today on the Hillsdale College Podcast Network.  KelTechttps://KelTecWeapons.comInnovation. Performance. Keltec. Learn more at KelTecWeapons.com today.Patriot Mobilehttps://patriotmobile.com/danaGet a free month of service with code Dana.ReadyWise https://readywise.comUse promo code Dana20 to save 20% on any regularly priced item.Tax Network USAhttps://TNUSA.com/DANADon’t let the IRS control your life—empower yourself with Tax Network USA. Visit TNUSA.com/DANA

Dana Lashes Absurd Truth podcast, sponsored by Keltec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. Can I do? Man, if I would come into this

beside the Florida Man thing with any song, I think it'd be a jukebox hero, maybe. Did you guys hear about this? So these dudes got into a fight over the jukebox, what was playing on a jukebox.

and this dude ended up getting shot. So a Florida man was shot dead after he got into a dispute over a jukebox song. And it was at a Mexican restaurant. And I love how they're like, it turned violent. It was in Fort Lauderdale early Monday morning. It was an argument over a jukebox song. And the dispute began at this restaurant when one man began commenting on another person's music selection, according to authorities.

Said Maro Bonilla, he said to WSVN TV, quote, I heard there was two guys and they got to an argument because he sounds like he's from Jersey. Because one of them played a song in the jukebox and the other guy

was kind of ticked off. And he goes, the guy who got insulted pulled his weapon and started shooting the other guy. They actually wrote it phonetically as he said it. So the guy drew his weapon first

and the other, so one of them played a song on the machine and the other guy was mad and said, You're not a real Mexican if you play that music is what he said, which then made me stop and go, well, how can, what is not real Mexican then? Like, if, if he played, what did he play that he got accused of not being a real Mexican? Yeah, like, Kane, you're white adjacent. So, you know, like what would somebody play in a Mexican restaurant that would make you go, that's, you're not a real Mexican.

What does that work? I don't know. Anything but despicito. Anything but. Don't have Joe Biden go there. Anyway, the guy who was shot and killed was a 54-year-old. The other guy was taken into custody. And, man, they had just out of all the stories.

A Florida man wearing an ankle monitor tried kidnapping, attempts of kidnapping in a Walmart parking lot, spotted when legs were flailing out the truck, according to the affidavit. Juan Marcos Perez, he tried to kidnap a woman. woman in Orlando, and he had an ankle monitor on. And it was 4.30 p.m. Monday. And he tried to put her in the trunk of the car. And he was threatening to kill her. And witnesses said that she watched, she turned and looked as the victim's legs were flailing out of the trunk. They did get him.

They saved the woman. And they got her. He's going to court now. Obviously, he's in prison. Partners that help bring you free radio. It's the folks over at Keltec. It's the P15. The P15 should be your choice for concealed carry. It is the lightest, thinnest, double stack. 9mm on the market, and it's made by the people who invented the microcompact pistol category that is KELTEC. There's the metal version and the polymer version, and both come with two magazines, standard 15 round with minimal pinky extension. You also have flush fit double-stack magazine that holds 12 rounds, tritium and fiber optic front site, fully adjustable fiber optic 2. Rear, lifetime warranty, compact, easily concealable, and it's from KELTEC. Quality, performance,

innovation, Keltec. Learn more about the P-15 at Keltekweapons.com. That's K-E-L-T-E-C-Weapons.com. It's the P-15. Tell them Dana sent you. Welcome back to the program. Dana Lash with you. Do you guys, what's your favorite? King, what's your favorite book of the Bible? Favorite book of the Bible? Man, that's a tough one because I do like Psalms. You go back to that one a lot for like Psalms? Yeah, P-Solms. So I think it'd be Psalms. there's a lot of books there and a lot of things to pull from. I'm partial to Ephesians.

But what about those ecclesiastics, huh? You know, the book about the ecclesiastic people. Oh, wait a minute. That's just, apparently that's what Kamala Harris says. She thinks that that's Old Testament scripture. I'm not kidding. Audio sound like one. You know, there's a time for patience.

And there's a time for impatience. That's not in ecclesiastics. But I just want a script for a minute, Mayor. The ecclesiastics, you know, remember when they got, I feel like I say this a lot. Do you remember when, do you remember when they got mad at Trump? What did he say, two Corinthians? Yeah. Is that what he said?

It's not one, but two Corinthians. Something like that, right? Or Second Timothy and said he said two Timothy. I think it was that. Was it that? It was one of them. I don't remember. It was one of them.

Oh, my gosh. And the left, the left was. Can you believe Trump doesn't know this biblical book? He doesn't know this book of the Bible. Can you believe it? And they just lost their minds. What about the ecclesiastic people? I mean, that's, it's goofy, right?

And it just goes to show you that she, yes, you know, the ecclesiastics. That actually sounds like a great theological punk band name. where they take it's like they take the book of Psalms and they turn it into punk songs and their first album is called punk Psalms oh we're just writing it right here

and there that'd be great the last letter is an X that's right it can't be a CS that's right yeah yeah yeah ecclesiastics that's right oh my gosh that actually would be how is that not a punk band that actually would be really great I can see them opening up I can see them playing

like the Vatican, you know. You like go out there and see Peter. We're the ecclesiastics. I can see it, man. I would totally go to that show. Wouldn't you go to that show? It's just all Psalms, punk style. That actually, I want to do it.

I mean, I know enough power chords, and I can play rhythm guitar poorly enough that I could be a punk, I could be a punk guitarist. I can do it. And the next book in the Bible song of Solomon, right? That's the second. album. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah. Follow up. And then

in the style of paranoid, android, just have a character, just have a song called Solomon. It's ecclesiastics. Sounds great, doesn't it? It's a great. That's a great idea. I can't believe no one's done that yet. So she actually, she didn't come up with that idea, but anyway.

It's like that band Pentonics or what was the? Penitonics. I liked them for like five seconds and then I was like, okay, I'm done with it. I can only take so much. You know, like, There's certain types of music that for five seconds, I'm like, this is the greatest. And then it's too much. I revisit during the holidays.

Really? Yeah. I don't like. I don't know. It's usually in playlists and it pops up. I don't like it. Here and there. I mean, I don't dislike it.

I just, it's not my jam. I like the old crew. Yeah, yeah. It's not my jam, but I'll run across it during the holidays. When we were, when I was a little kid, I have no idea how we got on this subject. When I was a little kid, my mom would, they would put, her and my stepdad would have, because he, because he was, he had a record player. He was one of those people.

He was a vinyl, is a vinyl person. And he would play all kinds of like old Christmas music on these albums, these vinyl albums. And so, and that's how you decorate the tree and all that stuff. And so now I have to have that music around Christmas. You know what I mean? Ecclesiastics. Yeah, Ecclesiastics. Can you imagine the Ecclesiastics Christmas punk?

That's amazing. Like away in a manger, but Possible. funk style. That's so cool. Like a really fast drum. Oh my gosh. Like I'm already like imagining it in my head and you wouldn't have to pay royalties because it's kind of like considered American standard, right?

Dude, for reals. I can't believe that hasn't been done. Trademark copyright. I'm going to work on that right now. I'm saying I've got guitars. I mean, I can play, you know, I can make at least one part of it happen. I could play drums poorly enough where I could put

those tracks down. Can't play bass. to save my life unless it's like, you know, three, three chords. That's about it. But there you go. Where are we going? That's, okay, the acclade. You guys would buy that album, I feel like. I feel like you would. Can you imagine? Oh, my gosh. And you could, uh, oh, I'm just, I need to stop because I'm like going on and on and on. Can we just like do air guitar and like we're coming in with a little Metallica? We're in a very musical mood right now. It's Thursday. We're coming in towards the end of the week. And also, we, we were playing on Kamala Harris's Ecclesiastics

blunder And I had an idea For a theological punk band That covers Psalms, right? And so, Kane ran it through AI And it's Actually, it's not bad

Give it a, you got it? We got it up? Yeah, it's not licensed or anything So we can totally play it. This is our, Oh, you're playing it? Okay. Go turn it up.

It's the ecclesiastics covering Psalms. Wait, wait till it. It's not bad. It's a eye It's AI. It's AI. That's actually

That's a great fault. It's actually not bad, dude. It's actually not bad, dude. I'm in front. think AI could do this going to I didn't either I really wanted to hate it I wanted to hate it so bad I was always prejudiced against it I am

I am technologically prejudiced and so I was already prejudiced against it and it actually is not bad it's actually pretty good I'm not going to lie that's a and apparently AI improves itself like when you you

you sort of edit the type of style like remember we had first iterations of these songs and they were more like like Irish punk sort of drop kickmercish. It was like you had a bunch of people in an Irish pub who decided to set down their Guinness and then knock out a banner.

That's what it, you know, it sounds like that. Then it sort of morphed into what we're hearing now, and I think there's even more generations. It sounded almost, it got into shanty territory. It did. Just a wee bit. It did. The ecclesiastics.

I like, I would see them. I would go to a dive bar where there's probably not doors on the stalls in the women's room. I would go there. and watch that band. Absolutely. Yeah. So, I mean, we could do it.

I mean, we were talking about how, I mean, I play instruments. I can play rhythm guitar poorly. I can play drums. I could, you know, knock out something crude and, you know, you know, could, like an opening act at a dive bar. I could do that. But, you know, we ran it through AI for the purpose of time. And it's actually not bad. Not bad at all.

I've heard worse. I mean, and I love it even more because it's ours. So, I don't know. I feel like. Yeah, that's what... I love it. Can you play it again? Will you play it again, please?

I really like this song. It's the Ecclesiastics, our theological punk band. It's actually not bad. It's not bad. It's a little bit upbeat. me but oh that's so good dude i would so i would so see them it's a jam man that's a jam hey steve what's up does that slap it does sound like a sea shanty a little bit though see yeah it is a little sea shantyish although when we're talking about ecclesiastics i thought

it sounded like something you majored in college you know well i mean yes and no but but so comel Harris was straight. Can we play her thing her thing real quick? It's real short. She was trying, I don't know what, she was trying to say Ecclesiastes and she got the name of the, she got the book wrong. Listen. You know, there's a time for patience, and there's a time for impatience. That's not in ecclesiastics, but. Yes, that's right, ecclesiastics. She knows, Kamala Harris just referenced our punk band. That's right. So, yeah, thanks Kamala. I actually now, I mean, it's, I'm going to actually take this to the endth degree because I'm really, I actually like it. In an era where daily election headlines and political turmoil can create a sense of unrest,

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com slash Dana and use Codeana. Don't forget to tell them that I sent you in the post-purch survey. That's cozyearth.com slash Dana and use Co-Dana to get up to 40% off. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five. So the courts block Ken Paxton's appeal. They're going to have a gun ban at the State Fair of Texas, which is in one of the most peaceful and least crime-affected areas in all of the United States of America, particularly Texas. There's no crime at all whatsoever. ever happens in Arlington, Texas. There's never been any crime that's ever happened

at the State Fair of Texas. And I'm sure that they have more than enough resources to keep everyone safe from the gangbangers and the drug dealers that don't exist and are prevalent in the area when people go and are disarmed. So go and eat your giant meat on a stick. Don't get shot. Everything you said was false.

Maybe. Is it? Is it fake news? Or is it not? Nobody knows, do they? Yeah, the State Court of Appeals. So he's taking it all the way up. Go Paxton. also Colorado tops the United States in cocaine use again and honestly if I had to live next to some of the dirty hippies that are now like all throughout Colorado with their pot shops I'd probably have to use cocaine too

marks the second time in three years that Colorado tops the country in admitted cocaine use people are just like yeah we're on cocaine so it makes sense of Venezuelan games and everything in there six people are hurt and an explosion from an intentionally set IED as opposed to an accidentally set IED at a Santa Monica courthouse in California. You know, you don't accidentally set your IEDs.

The man, and this is just the headline over at ABC News, the story that was probably headlined by the editor, but it took three people to write 500 words. The explosion was around 848 a.m. Wednesday, the Santa Maria Courthouse and Santa Barbara, and it was a small, I mean, they said it. It was an explosion. That's why they got such crazy security of courthouses.

Let's see. China test fires and inter-interference. continental ballistic missile into the Pacific Ocean. I'm sure they meant for it to go into the atmosphere, but it probably just straight the hell up just shot into the water because it's China. Also, Nancy Pelosi's husband, and what I'm sure is just a total coincidence, sold more than $500,000 worth of visa stock just weeks before the Department of Justice's antitrust lawsuit. You know, it's just he's got very good instincts, and I'm sure he doesn't trade on his wife's insider knowledge at all whatsoever. You know, the guy.

who was assaulted in his underwear by another guy who I'm not a conspiracy theorist. Was it his boyfriend? I don't know, but he was a BLM Marxist progressive. Anti-Trust cops also alleged that Visa was forcing financial tech firms to work with it by threatening to penalize people who don't. Like Democrats. Also, AOC says that Eric Adams should resign as New York City mayor for the good of the city amid federal probes. You know who they want to get in, don't you? And we're going to talk about this. Andrew Cuomo is looking at his comeback. So who do you want as mayor of New York City? A guy that maybe is it considered a bribe or was it treatment?

I don't know. Do I care? Maybe. Maybe not. But would you rather have that guy in office that took some money from Turkey or the guy who killed all your grandparents with his policies? I don't, I mean literally killed them. He took his policies, fashioned them into a stake and stabbed your grandparents in the chest like they were Nosphiratu's. So I don't know.

Like who do you want in office? Andrew Cuomo? or do you want Eric Adams, the guy who helped create all of the problems that New York is dealing with now, or Eric Adams, who seems like less annoying of a Marxist, not maybe all the way a Marxist, willing to say some stuff about illegal immigration. Did he take money from Turkey? Nah. The only thing, the only difference with Eric Adams and all the other New York Democrats is Eric Adams is dumb enough to get caught.

That's literally the only thing, because all these cats have taken this kind of, they've taken upgrades, they've taken free trips, they've taken home. hotel stays literally every single one of them. He just got caught. That's the reality of it. In the spirit of punk bands, have you ever heard of a suicide pod? It's not a punk band actually. It's a way to die, like an actual way to die. This is, I think these things are terrifying. So the BBC, the British Broadcasting Company, has a story of how police in Switzerland made multiple arrests after a woman reportedly ended her life using a so-called suicide pod, which almost sounds like an inexcess song.

But that's blonde. It's apparently the first case of its kind. Okay, so here's where it gets super weird for me. I am fascinated by this story, and here's why. When you think of suicide pod and like going to murk yourself in a pod, I just think that I'm going into this like matrix type of environment where they have got them all. lined up and you go late and you press a button and it had like squirts gas in there. So this lady, she apparently had, like I guess a degenerative disease or something like that.

And she had been sick for a long time. And I, no, I'm not in support of euthanasia. She had been sick for a long time. And the, I guess she wanted to go into the suicide pod. so she's 64 years old. She's an American woman. And so she goes to this place out in the woods in northern Switzerland. So instead of going into this like matrix type environment, she's literally out into the woods. They had this pod out in the forest. And the maker of the Sarko suicide pod, they said that they wanted her to go under a canopy of trees. It was, it's designed to allow a person

inside to push a button then injects nitrogen gas into the sealed chamber, and then they fall asleep and then suffocate to death in a matter of minutes. So, and if you thought, if you wanted to know if the guy who made it looks nuts, he does. He, uh, the guy who invented it is, uh, you know, it looks nuts. So she's out, you know, in the woods in Switzerland, in the space pot. And then they put it out in the woods. So she gets in to the space pod or the, the, the suicide pod. And they said she pressed the button almost immediately. And it took like five minutes. And they said that, you know, they could see her.

They could tell when she went unconscious and her muscles were twitching. And then that said the police showed up and they found a woman's body in the pot. So I got a lot of questions also now, too. Like, did they leave her there? Like, how did that work? I mean, don't you get it out? And also, I know this is how my mind works. Please don't judge me.

But you know what the first thing I thought of when I saw it. There was a picture of it online. and like it's you know showed it open and it showed the guy invented it getting into it. It does actually look like it looks like an old tanning bed, yes. But when you get in there, just saying, not that I supported or ever would, you have to know that it's been used before. Is that weird? We've done it. So what?

Yeah, but it's weird though, right? Yeah, I mean, it's weird that you're going into a pod to die. I think the mindset of people who are wanting to do this, their least concern. The concern at the bottom of their list of concerns would be that someone else died there. Because I would be like, did someone crap their pants in here?

Like, did they mess themselves in here? Like, you know, because when the body goes, you lose control of those functions, right? That's true. So it's like, ooh, was it icky? Like, who had to clean that up? Did they clean it well? Because you're in the pod and you're pressing the button

Not that I would ever do this or suggest that you do this. It's horrible. But what if you notice like some gunk in it? Like, oh, they didn't get this spot. And then you're dead. That sucks. That's a horrible way to go. I don't think people are going to be concerned with that.

That's totally what I would be. I'm getting in there to die. The fact that it might have a little gunk in there is probably not going to be a big deal. You're getting into like a nasty like hobo pod. That's gross. That's so. I mean, yes, you're getting in the pod to murk yourself.

But shouldn't it be a cool? clean going, you know? It's so weird. I mean, I feel bad for the lady who thought she had no other choice. And they said that they put it out in the woods so she could look at the trees in the sky. Or because it's easier to hose it off. I don't know. Just. Oh, man, it's so weird. She cashed out her life savings and flew to Switzerland to do this. And I don't know. And it's, It's weird. This whole thing is weird.

And now there's like, um, accusations towards the group. Of course, it's called the last resort, uh, who they said that they, that,

um, they wanted to, they spent her money and wanted it to be, uh, they told her she would need it after she was dead. And they said that her family said that, her family said that they took advantage of her. That would,

that's one of the accusations. But the, the, the, this is just all so weird. It's just so weird. And they said that when you get, in it, it

has a little voice that says, quote, if you want to die, press this button. Yeah. Ajean's France press, got to look at it, and that's what it says. If you want to die, press this button. Is there another button that you just last minute decided you want to live? Is it you press?

Is the cleanliness not up to your standard? Press this button. Is the lid locked until you decide to die, or is it? Yeah, I don't. Yeah, I guess it seals you up in there. Good Lord. it's just so weird like you're i don't know but it does also sound like a punk band

suicide pod opening for the ecclesiastics one disapproves of the other hmm i don't know steve says it looks like a bad transformer emphasis on trans it does look like a bad like 70s transformer you know it looks like a pager a giant pager that's out in the woods right a giant flip phone Be careful because if it's from Taiwan and Israeli company out there, it could blow up just saying. Just saying.

I'm fascinated by this thing. But that's what it says to you. Like when you get in, like, press this button if you want to die. It's a 3D printed capsule. And you get in it and you press the button and that's it. That's horrible. That's just so bad.

I mean, and this woman was 60. She's young. You're telling me she couldn't get any other You know? I don't know. It's just the whole thing is weird to me. But the, they're trying to call it the Tesla of euthanasia. What a disregard for life. This is like mass produced life ending. That's horrible. And it's out of Switzerland. Can I also say, you know, and I love the Swiss. But man, this is some pretty weird Nordic ideas up there. Let's just create a pod that'll murk you like that in minutes. And then they'll have a whole line of them up. It's weird. Although, like, some of the best horror movies come from up there. Just saying. I was reading, too, like, they don't say how they dispose of the body, do they?

No. So, does it like? Open the lid and hope for wolves? Like, what do they? They open the lid and they do hope for wolves. Okay, no. I mean, I don't know if all of them are, like, out in nature. But I'm just, I'm a little curious because it looks like it could lean up and just

lump you out. What if it does that? What if it, like? like trebushes your dead body out of the pod. Well, look, if you're murking yourself in a pod, let's just drop all pretense of, you know, taste here. You're murking yourself in a pod. Nobody should be offended if I'm like, does it tray boucher your dead carcass out of it?

I mean, it's all horrible. Would it surprise you to find out there are people lined up to do this? That there is a line of people. That makes me sad that there are people that are lined up to do this. There's a waiting list to do this. 120 people apparently. There are some 120 applicants hoping to use the machine to end their lives according to the last resort. That's so sad to me.

I feel like the guy who's doing this who created this whole thing is I just think that it's exploitative and you're praying upon people at like a horrible time in their lives. And it makes me feel sad that these people don't have a support network. I mean, the pot is ludicrous. but it, you know, it doesn't distract from just the sadness that I feel for people who feel like they got to do this. It's just, oh, goodness. Why does the guy who they call Dr. Death, he's this Australian euthanasia advocate, why do these people always look like freaks? They always look like freaks. Do they not?

Wasn't it Kovorkian for us in Michigan, I think, or something? They always look like, like, you know they are the villains. You immediately know, oh, that's the bad guy, because he looks like the bad guy. He's just, you know, they got to look. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast.