The Dana Show with Dana Loesch - BONUS: A History Of James Talarico's Ungodly Sermons

Episode Date: May 29, 2026

 James Talarico once called women, “neighbors with a uterus”. Gays in Germany are turning heel to vote for their conservative party. President Trump lays out the final terms on an Iran deal inclu...ding lifting the naval blockade of the Strait of Hormuz. The White House has launched an Aliens website confirming the existence of illegal aliens walking among us in the United StatesThank you for supporting our sponsors that make The Dana Show possible…Jones Road Beautyhttps://jonesroadbeauty.comFor a limited time, get a free gift on your first purchase with code DANA. Cheers Healthhttps://cheershealth.com/DANA Native Path Grass Fed Collagenhttps://getnativepath.com/DanaFor my special offer get up to 45% OFF. Try it risk-free with a 365-day money-back guarantee. HumanNhttps://Humann.com/Dana*This partner has been on my show the LONGEST - show them your love, this product WORKS! Pocket HoseText DANA to 64000For a limited time, get two FREE gifts—a 360° rotating pocket pivot and thumb drive nozzle when you buy a new Pocket Hose Ballistic; just text DANA to 64000, message and data rates may apply.Byrnahttps://Byrna.com/DanaTrusted by law enforcement, security professionals, and everyday Americans—defend yourself and your family with Byrna.Patriot Mobilehttps://PatriotMobile.com/DANA Visit online or call 972-PATRIOT and use promo code DANA for a free month of service.Subscribe today and stay in the loop on all things news with The Dana Show. Follow us here for more daily clips, updates, and commentary:YoutubeFacebookInstagramXMore InfoWebsite

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 President Trump's endorsement powers Ken Paxon to the Texas GOP Senate nomination, and he now battles the radical James Talarico. L.A. Mayor Karen Bass says she wants to explore non-citizen voting. You already know what her answer is. And the Democratic autopsy is an amateur mess that still won't admit why Kamala Harris lost. I'm Greg Corummus, inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the Three Martini Lunch podcast. We'll give you the top news, some good laughs, and we'll be done in 30 minutes. Follow the Three Martini Lunch on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:31 Welcome back to the program. Your hostess with the mostess, your lovable curmudgeon, Dana Lash sitting in with you. Getting you set up for the weekend. All right, you guys ready. Ladies, men, you might want to move out of the way because your lady's about to have a real one right now. I'm going to be playing some audio for you and your lady ain't going to like it. Mm-hmm. You know how I love it whenever my husband sees that something's going to just flip that what I call the bitch switch.
Starting point is 00:00:58 Sorry. Sorry, y'all. I'm not Door of the Explorer. he just steps to the side. We would have married almost 26 years. The man knows what's up, right? He knows when to be like, now, woman, calm down, and then he knows when to get out the way.
Starting point is 00:01:12 This is going to be one of them times, ladies. Everybody else is going to need to get out the way from around you. I want you to hear James Tolariko in 2024. How would you, how would you describe a woman? This is how he does. Every one of our neighbors with a uterus, What? Put a hand over my mouth right now because I'm about to be ungodly.
Starting point is 00:01:40 About to be ungodly right now. Not as ungodly as the serpent. But neighbors with a uterus. How do you think any Texan is going to vote for something like that? Neighbors with a uterus. You mean women? You sexist oppressor. you mean females, ladies, women.
Starting point is 00:02:09 A woman. Why is that so hard for them to acknowledge? That is erasing the existence of women. Only women have uteruses. Only women were designed with these attributes. So don't sit here and erase us by saying neighbors with a uterus. This guy is trying to be too manufactured by half. This is so ridiculous.
Starting point is 00:02:40 This is not going to go well. Don't listen to the press. That doesn't mean you sit on your laurels, but this is not going to go well with Texas voters at all. Because even moderate Texans are like, uh, what? There are certain things we used to all be able to agree on. You know what I'm saying? Green Day's not punk.
Starting point is 00:02:58 People that have vaginas are women, right? Taco Bell isn't really that bad. And, uh, dudes have male copulatory organs, things that we used to all be able to agree on. And now at least two of those things are lost in the wind, and it's the scientifically most obvious ones. You just can't make this stuff up. And this is, so this is, I mean, this is sexist. He is a sexist oppressor. Now, all of the times at the left sits here and goes, oh, Trump is going to be like the handmaid's tail. I had someone asked me if I ever watched that, and I'm, I don't watch, I don't watch chick flicks.
Starting point is 00:03:40 I don't watch chick flicks where women complain and moan and flail about the place and act like they're so victim. I just don't do it. But what's funny is all of the talk about that, and remember every single time Trump, they always have protesters, uh, uh, feminists that show up dresses hand, is it hand, handmade stales. It's a Margaret Atwood book, uh, handmade tail costumes, right? And, yeah, the handmaids tail, they all dress up like this. And they would, they still do it even today. You have actual Democrats erasing you from the lexicon and you're mad at Trump.
Starting point is 00:04:19 You're mad at Republicans. You have Democrat males refusing to even acknowledge your existence, erasing you. Neighbor with a uterus. It's like saying person with sperm. It's not nice to erase people. Just what a fruitcake. What an absolute fruit cake. We got some audio of this guy.
Starting point is 00:04:47 He's just, this is not going to go over well at all with voters. It's just not, not at all. And I got to play for you. This was also a year ago where Tala Rico opened a legislative session invoking communist jargon and heresy. Listen to this. Holy mystery. you have so many names.
Starting point is 00:05:11 The Torah calls you creator. The Quran calls you peace. The Gita calls you destroyer. The Dharma calls you truth. And the first epistle of John calls you perhaps the most beautiful name of all, love. You are the strange love uniting all things. The love that drew elements together after that big bang.
Starting point is 00:05:36 What? The love that drew life itself from. those primordial oceans. I mean, he's trying to cover, this is like a Portlandia episode. This is a Portland. I have to check all these boxes so I can
Starting point is 00:05:51 make sure that I'm reaching out and touching everybody. And I'm including everyone, so no one can say anything. No one can say anything. That's it. You know, a lot of people say, oh, well, you know, he's not as bad as Paxton. You know, Paxton, you know, he was a fornicator. At least Kent Paxton knows
Starting point is 00:06:08 what a woman is. Also, I think there's a difference. My friends have been having a big debate about this. I think there's a difference between doing things that, you know, are not right, that are questionable, especially your covenant, et cetera, and then literally preaching heresy and trying to mislead people on a warped Pied Piper's path to hell. And I told you how yesterday that that's a pretty big penalty in the Bible for that. Tala Rico, he's going to try to be, he's going to try to outgoody two shoes, Paxton.
Starting point is 00:06:43 But one of them is going to be voting for all of the stuff that you just voted against. One of them is going to be supporting DEI. One of them is going to be supporting gun control. One of them's going to try his damnness to get men and boys into your girls' locker rooms and bathrooms. That's a fact. And it's not going to be Paxton. So what are you voting for? Because if you don't vote, you might as well.
Starting point is 00:07:06 well vote for Tolerico. This is not one that you set out. Not at all. This is not an election that you set out. Everybody needs to get over themselves, pull up their bridges, and do and vote. You have to look at these people like they are tools to advance what best advances your pieces on the chessboard. That's how you got to look at it. And if you can't look at it, then that means you can't look it that way. Then I question whether or not you can get over yourself enough to save the country. That's what it's about. Yes, it's harsh words. I mean every bit of it. I mean, for crying out loud, even the gays in Germany are getting it. I'm still sorry, I still find this hysterical.
Starting point is 00:07:40 I had this during headlines. All the gays in Germany apparently are turning fast against mass immigration, and they're overwhelmingly voting for Germany's alternative for Germany, the AFD. It's their, like, conservative party. And Kane and I cannot, because they, as Kane said, well, they don't want to be hung from cranes. Well, I can see it. But I mean, when you have the gay, the German gays voting conservative, you know that you've lost the plot as the leftist. Because the schrockets people, now's the time that we dance.
Starting point is 00:08:15 We cannot vote for the left. We don't want to be turned into goats and hung from cranes. Who? It's true. I mean, everybody is waking up and realizing, okay, this is bad. We can't be doing this anymore. This is so bad. It's true.
Starting point is 00:08:34 They're all waking up and realizing it. Like this, this is, oh gosh, cut 11. I've got to place him. He's still around. I got to play some Tim Walz. He's basically what you would get from Beto and Tala Rico in a more older form. Watch. Do you want to hear more from members and leaders from the small community to say,
Starting point is 00:08:57 we need to hold our, we need to look at ourselves. We need to hold our own neighbors accountable because look at the damage that this is gotten to like me. What do you want to hear more from it? Instead of just saying, don't blame us, do you want to see more oversight from it in this? Look, it's not law-abiding citizens. If that were the case, there's a lot of white men should be holding a lot of white men accountable for the crimes. Wait, wait, wait, what? Okay, hold up. He says his direct quote, it's not law-abiding citizens. If that were the case, there's a lot of white men who should be, I don't even understand what this means. What does that say?
Starting point is 00:09:34 It is not law-abiding citizens. If that were the case, there is a lot, first off, there are, not is, because you're talking about a plural subject. There are a lot of white men who should be holding a lot of white men accountable for the crimes they've committed. What are? For example, what? He said, every community has this in their own midst, but to blame them and say they should
Starting point is 00:09:59 have been responsible. Do you realize that out of all of the people, and there's been like, what, 60, some odd convictions. Only two were not Somali. One was half. So one and a half were not Somali. You know that, right? That's truth. So what? And then, then he says this. I think we have to educate folks about why they shouldn't commit crimes. So basically what Tim Walse is saying is, well, you know, Somalis are stupid. They don't know how to not do crimes. We've got to teach these dumb bastards how to not do crimes.
Starting point is 00:10:47 Is that okay? That's what he said. Sorry. I'm not Door the Explorer. I'm not PBS. I will make you rue the day. You sit your kids in front of me for entertainment. Don't do that.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Or do that. I don't know. I grew up with it and I was fine. So that's what he's saying here. He says, no, the idea that the idea that the Somali communities to blame. That's how we got into it. What?
Starting point is 00:11:12 They are to blame. And he literally was the guy that headed it. He was over. He had direct oversight of all of this stuff. What is he talking about? This is insane. I can't with these people, Kane. Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:34 Really quickly, can I go back to the Ferrari? So Ferrari, they're trying to say their leadership is trying to say, no, people love our EVs. They're loving them. We're selling them. Demand is up. But they're not. No one's buying it because it looks like the Nissan Leaf. It does. It looks just like it. So this is really a, this is an AI. No, I know, don't get mad at me over AI. I think a lot of their hysteria over data centers is overblown because it's a Chinese sciop to get you to try to stop development in the United States so China can take the lead.
Starting point is 00:12:06 But this adds hysterical. This is cut 14. Some cars don't just change your lifestyle. They change who you are. I'm gay now. Ferrari Luke's. So if you're not watching the simulcast, the dad drives up in the new, and it's not loose, it's Lucia. He drives up in the Ferrari Lucia. And he gets out, and his clothes change immediately.
Starting point is 00:12:37 Like he gets out and he was like in a dark jacket. And then he gets out and he's like in Cosbyware. It's like if Bill Cosby did a suit. that's like the Cosby sweater but a suit. And his wife is like, what is happening? And he sees this kid and he puts his hands on his kid's shoulders and he's like, I'm gay now because he got the luce. I mean, seriously, I would think that that person,
Starting point is 00:13:04 if you pulled up in that car, I would think the same thing. With that you telling me, no cap, I would think that. I'd think that. That's right. We have Florida man on the way. Do you ever notice how the passage of time can change the world? rules on you. All right, so maybe there was a time when you could have a couple of drinks at dinner, go to sleep, wake up, and ta-da, you're ready for the day. Now, if you so much as have a
Starting point is 00:13:28 glass of wine and look at one more, you're dead. You're foggy. You wake up tired, unmotivated, your skin looks horrible. You didn't do anything crazy, right? You drank water. You ate dinner. You had a lot of protein. You went to bed at a normal time. You got the full eight hours. Cheers Restore is a doctor-backed pill that helps restore your mornings by addressing the real reason for your brain fog and exhaustion. So when alcohol leaves your system, your brain goes into rebound mode while you sleep, making you feel terrible. Cheers Restore uses a natural compound from a Japanese raisin tree known as DHS to help smooth all that out, while cysteine helps your liver clear out toxic byproducts of alcohol faster. They've sold over 50 million doses of this.
Starting point is 00:14:18 And you can find it at Target, CVS, Walgreens. But for a limited time, all of my listeners, because you guys are special er, get 20% off their entire online order with code Dana at cheershealth.com slash Dana. That's cheershealth.com slash Dana. Code Dana for 20% off. Tell them Dana sent you. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's quick find. Something very interesting is a foot in Germany.
Starting point is 00:14:48 German gays have turned against mass immigration, and they are overwhelmingly voting for the AFD, the Conservative Party. They surveyed over 60,000 gay Germans through an app, and they overwhelmingly said that they're going to be voting for AFD. Dude, they lost the gays. in Germany of all places. I don't know what to make of this. Up is down, black is white. Everything's crazy. What do we do?
Starting point is 00:15:24 That's hysterical. Oh, what are they going to do now? Adversaries are targeting U.S. military and war zones using app location data. This is apparently something that the Army Times reported yesterday, citing a Reuters article. It said that U.S. Senator Ron Wyden, an Oregon Democrat, said apparently that CENTCOM had received multiple threat reports concerning adversary exploitation of commercial location data to target or surveilled personnel in theater. Remember how the French soldier last month, they figured out where a French vessel was because the guy was using some app. What was the workout app?
Starting point is 00:16:03 It was like a running app. And they were able to find him because of that. That's not smart. But they said that they got to be, you know, they apps know where people are. They share the data. and it records typically whereabouts every two seconds. So it's got probably smart not to be, yeah, not to be on that. Average, let's see, interest on the national debt is eating a record, about average 19% of federal revenue. And apparently it's going to get worse, according to financial watchdogs that have been waving the red flag on this.
Starting point is 00:16:35 We spend more on debt interest than Medicaid national defense of everything combined. That's what we, so that's, whenever you hear people, People talk about, we should be spending money on what? We spend more debt on welfare than we do more on welfare than anything else at all whatsoever. It's insane. A lot of people like Jones Road because it doesn't try to turn you into some filtered, overly airbrushed, marzipan version of yourself. If you love their miracle bomb, but maybe you want a little bit more coverage, you need
Starting point is 00:17:06 to check out their new foundations tech. Most foundations feel heavy and greasy, like you're just spackling on your face, but not this because this one's different. It glides on lightweight. It gives you real coverage, but your skin still looks like skin, not like cakey or overdone or a mask. It's just even, healthy and natural. And it's packed with actual skincare ingredients, seramide, squalane, sodium, hyalurinate. So while you're wearing it, it's not drying you out or sitting in every little pour or a line on your face. You can build it up where you need it or keep it sheer for whatever kind of day that you're having. It comes in 30 shades, so you can actually find one that matches without looking like you borrowed somebody else's face.
Starting point is 00:17:49 So for a limited time, all of my listeners get a free gift on their first purchase with code Dana. Visit Jones Road Beauty.com and use code Dana for your free gift. With his staff and support to figure out the next steps here, he calls it time for a final determination on whether or not we will see an extension, a 60-day extension, to the ceasefire in the war with Iran. And in that time, here's what he wants to see. This is what he has put out on his truth social. Iran must agree that they will never have a nuclear weapon or bomb. The Hormuz Strait must be immediately opened.
Starting point is 00:18:27 No tolls for unrestricted shipping traffic in both directions. All water mines, bombs, if any, will be terminated. And then he goes on to say, ships caught in the strait due to our amazing and unprecedented naval blockade, which will now be lifted, may start the process of heading home. We are a waiting word from the president right now. So we're just waiting to see what POTUS does with this, because it's going to happen at any time, and we're going to have to take it when he comes out. And just to let you know when that happens, you know, we'll update you about it and let you
Starting point is 00:18:59 know what's going on. But the reality is that he's, because he's in the cabinet room, or he's in the, with this cabinet right now. and this is all supposed to be all of the latest with is it's not a negotiation to end the conflict it's a negotiation for ceasefire so we're not even at the point where we can have you know a complete stoppage of hostilities so just you know that's that's all this is it's just a a way to get to the ceasefire and then from there go towards maybe, maybe stopping hostilities. But then Iran has also said that they don't want any kind of stewardship of the straight,
Starting point is 00:19:49 that they want to maintain control of the straight. And that's just not something that POTUS is willing to compromise on. So that's expected, I mean, Kain is expected to have in literally like any minute. So it might be kind of jarring for you guys if you're listening because we may have to be like, oh, wait, we're going to go because we're going to have to take because it's all going to be that. And I want to make sure that, you know, because we have to talk about it. So we have to play it. We have to take it live when it happens so that we also can know what's happening and can share that with you.
Starting point is 00:20:20 So welcome to the radio program, Dana Lash, with you. We're at the top of this first hour here. And that's the latest. So we talked a little bit about it yesterday. the, maybe kind of what to expect from it, what not to expect, we'll see. But the point is that it's supposed to be just the negotiation with also all of our Gulf allies, you know, the Saudis, et cetera, they've all, have been a part of this, UAE, etc. So we'll see what comes from this.
Starting point is 00:21:00 to happen. I mean, he's been in this meeting all morning. He was in the situation room with his cabinet. He's been there literally all morning. And the now, Kane, what did you, you dropped in, it's like, you don't think he's going to come out until after the market closes, really. Yeah. I mean, we've seen it already
Starting point is 00:21:16 before over the past couple of months, where he's, like, especially with this Iran situation and the way oil, remember with that weekend when he actually postponed it and then oil dropped because of the futures, everyone One thought that, well, that was the thing.
Starting point is 00:21:32 So he came out after the market closed, and then the oil futures dropped after the market closed. So most of the volatility in the market was avoided because he did that. So I'm guessing that maybe something that he'll do this time. And again, it's just speculation on my point. Now that you said that he's not going to do it. Now that you said that he's going to be like, no, you know, Kane said this. So, yeah, I think I'm going to have to do the other thing. I'd rather get the information before the market closes, actually.
Starting point is 00:21:59 Well, yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people would also. I think a lot of people would also. So that's, I mean, that's a possibility, but they're all meeting in there. The cabinet they've assembled. And they, we went back and forth on the, I guess, the sigh up of it all because there were conditions that were kind of sort of released bit by bit, like a drip drip. It's like what Iran did to the United States the first time they were negotiating the ceasefire. and they were trying to act as though, oh, the United States agreed that Lebanon is completely a part of it when they weren't. Lebanon wasn't privy to it at all.
Starting point is 00:22:36 Lebanon even actually came out and corrected the record, which was pretty embarrassing for the Iranians. They were like, we're not doing this. This is not at all what is happening. Lebanon is not part of this at all. Stop it. And that was because Pakistan got its busy body in there, and they were mucking it all up for everybody. And they were doing that because it was all to protect Hezbollah. So I don't think anybody really, they said yesterday that they had a significant percentage hammered out,
Starting point is 00:23:06 but it was just some of these other finer details. Meanwhile, we're all waiting to see what happens. Everybody's waiting to see what happens with gas prices, with the market, with everything. And so it's all a wait and see, right? We're all just kind of waiting to see. So like I said, if POTUS does come out and because I think he's going to hold it probably in the situation room, I would think. Then we're going to take that. We'll take that live as it happens because it's going to be important.
Starting point is 00:23:36 So we'll see that. Now he tweeted out. Hold up. He had tweeted, posted this up. He had tweeted, posted this out. He had said, and remember also it all comes down to the dust. the dust, that nuclear dust, which this is the first time, I think, in the whole discussion that I've ever heard of that referenced. Am I wrong on that? Had they ever talked about nuclear dust before?
Starting point is 00:24:01 Or am I just, did I not pay attention previously? I think there's nuclear dust because of what we did on the original strike on Iran last year. No, they, well, they were, well, yes. And we were trying to get, we're just trying to get everything that we can get. We're trying to take control of it. So that's, that's, we'll see. But they said he tweeted out, let me pull this up because this was, bear with me, because this does not want to open. All right here. He had tweeted out, quote, Iran must agree that they will never have a nuclear weapon or bomb or move straight, must be immediately open. No tolls for unrestricted shipping traffic in both directions. All water mines, parenthetical bombs, if any,
Starting point is 00:24:40 will be terminated. We have removed through detonation numerous such mines with our great underwater mine sweepers. Iran will complete the immediate removal and or detonation of any mines. that are left, which will not be many. Ships caught the straight due to our amazing and unprecedented naval blockade. He says that, he said the ships that are caught in the straight, that's all that's going to be lifted. They can start the process of heading home. Say hello. He goes, say hello to your wives, husbands, parents, and families. From me, your favorite president. He tweeted, he actually had that in there. So he said, the enriched material sometimes referred to as nuclear dust,
Starting point is 00:25:20 which is buried deep underground with virtually collapsed mountains caused by our powerful B2 bomber attack 11 months ago. Sitting on top of it will be on earth by the United States. He says, which it is agreed is the only country along with China that has the mechanical, the mechanical, excuse me, capability of doing so. In close coordination and conjunction with the Islamic Republic of Iran, plus the atomic energy agency and destroyed, etc. He said no money will be exchanged until further notice. he said other items of far less importance have been agreed to. He goes, I will be meeting now in the situation room to make a final determination. So that's the, it's what they have buried under what our bombers took out.
Starting point is 00:26:04 So that's the nuclear dust, the enriched material, which is buried under those, because the B2 when it drop bombs. That's, so that's, and we want, I almost said custody, possession of that. We want possession of that. So that, I mean, anytime, if he does wait for the markets to close, and it's like at the end of the show, I actually am going to be mad, I think. Why? Well, because that means I, then we're going to have to watch all what everything happens tonight and tomorrow. You know, like do it now.
Starting point is 00:26:39 I'm tired of waiting. Is anybody else tired of waiting? When I get aggravated enough, I'll pop you. I just don't want to sit here and negotiate it, right? tired of it. I understand it takes a little bit longer to pull this regime out by the roots. There are, look, when he negotiates and then they're, hey, look, we got a deal. And then they come around and later and say, no, we didn't agree to that. It's constant back and forth like that with these guys. So my guess is he is just getting the finer details and confirmations
Starting point is 00:27:06 on all of these points in the agreement and making sure that they're not going to just go back on their word like they've done every single time in this conflict. I just don't know we're pretending that they aren't going to go back on their word. Like, this is the 11th time. It is the third regime, and half of it's gone. The 11th time. So you're saying there's a chance. I think we just need to send a bunch of Southern women with flip-flops over there
Starting point is 00:27:32 and make them all go cut their own switches. It would end today. Jim, and Christmas. If you send a bunch of nannas and Gigi's over there and Mimi's, holy crow. That'll get done. done. They'll pull them out. They'll pull them out by their ears is how they'll do that. So we're going to keep an eye on all of this as well. We've got a number of other things to get into in addition to this. So I actually was really mad yesterday after the show because I see this thing
Starting point is 00:28:04 that pops up. First off, I saw it in a meme and it was a meme where you're looking at a picture of people sitting like a crowd shot and it says look at the corner, look at the, look at the, look at corner of the picture and you look at the corner of the picture and it says don't read the caption you read the caption says don't look at the shirt and you look at the shirt and it says aliens.gov and I was like what? And so immediately my first thought was when you hear aliens.gov, what do you think of? Actual like aliens right? E.T man like little green dudes and stuff. They're going to, you know, probe Uranus and all this. That's what I was talking about the planet you godly. heathen or not. So you go to the website and I mean it's like it has stars. It has like a matrix X files
Starting point is 00:29:00 font. They walk among us. For 60 years the U.S. government has held, kept a closely guarded secret. Aliens have been walking among us living in our neighborhoods and interacting with us in our daily lives. Now I got to that part and I was like, I knew it. I knew it. Don't call me naive. Stop it. The world is boring and full of horrors. I wanted some excitement of my life, okay? If I'm not going to get hit by a giant asteroid, God willing, it could still happen, then at least maybe send some aliens to cause some chaos. And it goes on.
Starting point is 00:29:30 It says they've shopped in the same stores. They've attended the same classes as our children. They've lived seemingly normal human existences. So at this point, I'm like, all the people that I think are weird are probably aliens, right? Right? It's the first thing I'm thinking of. Yeah. I'm like, oh my gosh, who do I know who's?
Starting point is 00:29:47 potentially an alien. Oh my gosh, this broad is totally an alien. This guy's to, oh my gosh, it's like that men-in-black episode when they realize Elvis is an alien. He just, he didn't die. He just went home, right? And I'm thinking of all of this. Like, this is actually such a men-in-black way of telling everyone. It's sort of disarming, right? It disarms you, so you're not freaking out about, you know, aliens who could come and melt your face off. I'm like, oh, yeah. And it goes with one exception. They do not belong here. I'm like, yeah, they don't belong here. what? That's right, E.T. Unless, you know, you're coming,
Starting point is 00:30:21 bearing gifts. I mean, I would take that. It says millions arrived under the cover of darkness. I'm like, ooh, they got here at night. That explains all the lights in the sky, right? Crop circles, etc. Countless presidents and congressmen and senior officials knew what was happening. Yes, they did. Oh my gosh. And it goes down, and
Starting point is 00:30:37 you're reading, and it's President Trump was first to call it the real danger that aliens pose. I'm like, oh, they pose danger. They pose danger. And I'm so excited. Yes, Space Force. I'm an enlist right now. And this is the truth is no longer out here. It's right here right now.
Starting point is 00:30:55 And then you go down and it's illegal aliens. It's not exciting. I mean, granted, yes, they don't belong here. I like that. But, and you can go all to, like they have an interactive map where you literally can go and see the criminal charges. This is so smart. I mean, they did what we were telling them to do, but not like this, though, because save this for the real aliens. Because this is what's going to happen.
Starting point is 00:31:19 They're going to come out with the real aliens. Like, oh, my gosh, people. they're going to suck your brain out through your ear. You got to wrap your head and foil and run away. And they're going to have like a serious. And no one's going to believe them. No one's going to believe them because of COVID, because of the masking, because of the clot shot, because of the six feet of separation, and because of this website.
Starting point is 00:31:37 No one is going to believe it. We're going to look at it and be like, whatever. And then all of our brains are going to get sucked out of our ears because we didn't listen because we didn't believe because there was no trust. Do you see how this happens, Kane? We've committed suicide by crying wolf too many times. I mean, it's clear as day. Clear as day.
Starting point is 00:31:53 Right here. This is just them softening the blow for when they're like, okay, remember the illegal aliens? Okay, here's the real ones. They're going to eat your babies for real. All right, folks, so I want to tell you about something that actually works. This is the world's number one expanding garden hose and their newest upgrade. It's the pocket hose ballistic. I like anything that has the word ballistic after it.
Starting point is 00:32:16 I don't have time for cheap, stupid equipment that fails after one season. I am done fighting with it. I'm done with the kinks. Eric Swalwell. I'm done with the tangles. I'm done with the leaks. I'm done with all of it. It's a waste of money. It's enraging. So that's why the pocket hose ballistic. That's why you need to have this thing because it's built different. I could beat somebody to death with us. It's made. It's reinforced with a liquid crystal polymer. Now, you don't know what that is, but you do know what it's been used in before. Bulletproof vests. So that means, my friends, the strength is real. Real durability. No nonsense. It's not going to mess up your garden. It's not going to like tie a knot around you. If you're tied to replacing your cheap hose every year, this is your fix. The ballistic is lightweight. It's super easy to handle. And I like what comes with it. It comes with the pocket pivot. So no more fighting the spigot. And ladies, it's gold. Where it moves, you move, you move, it moves. It's so simple. It's smart. You're done. For a limited time when you purchase a new pocket hose ballistic. You're going to get that free. You see it right here. 360-degree rotating pocket pivot and a free thumb drive nozzle.
Starting point is 00:33:25 Just text Dana to 6-4-3-0. That's Dana to 64-0-0 for your two free gifts with purchase. Message and data rates may apply. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida man. This man wanted Pokemon cards so bad, he used a chainsaw to cut through a hurricane-proof window. Hurricane! before escaping with thousands and rare Pokemon cards.
Starting point is 00:33:54 This is so ridiculous. A 33-year-old man, Clayton Warren, he's accused of targeting collection realm in Lake Park, Florida, in the early morning hours of May 21st Cain surveillance footage reportedly showed the suspect first attempting to smash the store's hurricane-resistant front window with a rock before switching up his tactics and using a battery-powered chainsaw to cut through that glass.
Starting point is 00:34:18 He carved a triangular opening, enter the store, got 12,000 worth of cards, and left. The store thanked everybody on social media because they were able to, I think, like, they got the guy. They tracked him down using license plate reader tech. So good heavens. These people. Let's see. A Florida man, this is, let me ask you guys this.
Starting point is 00:34:46 If you found millions of dollars washed up on the beach, would you hand it in? Millions? Millions. Maybe I'd hand some of them. of it in. Would you? Maybe some of it. Like here's 20 bucks I found. I'm not going to lie. Here's 20 bucks they found on the beach. You know all those after school specials?
Starting point is 00:35:00 They were like, oh, you found something? Give it back. And I'm like, you're stupid. I'm being honest with you. There's no way I would. Yeah. If you found, Steve, if you found millions of dollars on the beach in Fort Lauderdale washing up on the beach, what would you do? I'm a big karma guy. I found a stack
Starting point is 00:35:17 of money and a rubber band on my college campus when I went there and I did turn it in once. So the Cops got to have it, not you. I mean, in hindsight, 2020. I would, you know what? You know how you take care of the karma? You give some of it to charity.
Starting point is 00:35:33 Is that how it works? I'm just saying. You steal it and then give it to charity? Okay. Yeah, yeah. Juan's like, that's not how it works. But it can. LLC.
Starting point is 00:35:42 You didn't steal it. You found it. It washed. Okay, the whole reason I'm bringing the story up is this Florida man was on the beach and millions of dollars washed up on the beach in front of him, like in a bag, millions of dollars, just casually washed up on a beach in Fort Lauderdale, right? And this man, he didn't try to run away with it.
Starting point is 00:36:07 They haven't named him yet. He just was, they just know he's wearing red trunks. And so he called police after finding the money. He didn't know what to do with it. He thought maybe it was drugs the way it was packaged because it was all right. I still would open it. And he turned. it in. I literally would not. I would not at all. I am being honest with you. You know why? Because
Starting point is 00:36:31 the IRS gets to take all of our money. So this is for me. I'm also the IRS. I identify as the IRS in this situation. If a man can say that he's a woman, I'll be damned if I can't say that I'm the IRS if a bag of millions of dollars washes up on a beach and I find it. Right. There's no givesies backsies. At least I'm being honest with you about it. No, I'm not, but I would give some to my church. And I'm just being honest about what I would do. See, as we move, our partners that will bring you the program,
Starting point is 00:37:03 it's the folks over at Burn a Gun. We've told you about Burn a Gun before. I always carry. I have no problem using lethal force to protect myself or my loved ones. And with the Burn a Gun, it's small enough to conceal carry, but it also provides a deterrent. to threats from up to 50 feet away, giving you distance and time and ability to get to safety. And it's made in Indiana.
Starting point is 00:37:33 It's built right there in Fort Wayne, Indiana. And there are, I think, maybe about 700,000 plus people who have selected Burn a diverse option for self-defense. You can visit burna.com slash Dana. Get your Burna today. It's B-Y-R-N-A-Berna.com slash Dana. Ready when you are. Like Sands Through the Hourglass, so are the days of the United States. As you are aware, the current administration feels Harvard admits too many foreign students,
Starting point is 00:38:11 and who knows, they may have a point. After all, what has any foreigner ever added to our American culture? with the possible exception of music, literature, art, cuisine, fashion, architecture, dance, scientific breakthroughs, and the core of our moral codes and ethical beliefs. I think there's my respect for Conan O'Brien. He previously tried to keep him, I think, tried to stay above it, but I don't know. This was such, this is just a stupid, it's stupid because it presupposes that Trump is talking about all immigrants. and he's only talking about illegal immigrants.
Starting point is 00:38:51 And the fact that they lie to you and they omit the illegal part, they do that because they know that their argument is lost. They just still don't like it anyway. So they have to manufacture a completely different position than the one that they're against which they're actually arguing. It's not, he doesn't, he's not opposed to immigration. He's opposed to illegal immigration. That's the big difference.
Starting point is 00:39:15 So you could ask, well, what of illegal immigrants? That would be the more proper way to ask an accurate way to ask that question. What if the legal immigrants contributed? Ask that instead. And then see what kind of answers that you get from that. That was just incredibly disappointing. I thought he was smarter than that. But you know what?
Starting point is 00:39:33 The moment you start actually liking someone beyond just being okay to be entertained by them is when it all goes downhill. You just can't ever invest actual real sentiment into most 99% of people anymore. You really can't. Because you're always going to be disappointed. Yeah, he was playing to an audience that was under-informed and over-emotional too. Just like him. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five.
Starting point is 00:39:58 You don't know that band. She's too young for you, bro. See, he's like, oh, yeah, you know what I'm going to play right now. He had to get in the CNC in there. All right, all right. Spotify. The CEO defends AI music. Want you to stop calling the Slop Slop.
Starting point is 00:40:16 Alex Nordstrom. What a, it's a Norwegian name. He says that it's, he's saying that the features are legal and controlled and blah, blah, blah. And he's like, stop calling AI Slop, Slop. AI Slop isn't Slap. But it is, though. I'm not going to listen. We're still going to call it that.
Starting point is 00:40:35 Let's see. Oh, man. We also have, ooh, a builder. Ooh, wait, what? A builder, 62-year-old builder was accused. Okay, really, of indecent exposure. He was working without a shirt on under his high-vis. And it was in...
Starting point is 00:40:54 Oh, let me guess. This is in Britain. Of course it is. It's in Liverpool. A builder claims he was accused of indecent exposure for working without a shirt under his high-vis jacket and a construction site during the heat wave. Because, as you know, the temperatures, because they measure everything in kilometers and Celsius over there,
Starting point is 00:41:10 at 95 degrees Fahrenheit. 62-year-old Jim Haynes was laying concrete slabs at the University of Liverpool during the bank holiday weekend. And he's a grandfather of three worksleevers in a high-vis vest and no t-shirt. And they said they cited him for indecent exposure. I think he needs to get the person who made the complaint and a headlock and a sweaty armpit and just get him in there. You know, uncle style.
Starting point is 00:41:38 Just get him in there.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.