The Debaters - 1816: Correcting Grammar & A Day on the Slopes

Episode Date: January 18, 2024

This episode from Season 14 goes to infinitives and beyond! First, Erica Sigurdson and Sterling Scott make their punctuation mark when they discuss correcting others on their spelling and grammar. Then, Tim Nutt and Ryan Williams are a black diamond in the rough in their debate on skiing and snowboarding.

Hi there, Steve Patterson here. You know, I travel a lot for work on my own, so when I can do a trip where I get to bring my wife Nancy and our daughters along, I jump at it. On a recent trip to Ottawa, we booked an Airbnb. It was a nice home in a nice neighborhood, and it even had room for our dog Ferris, which was also nice. And that made me think, hey, maybe our home in Toronto would be a nice place to stay for some nice people too, since it sits empty while we're away. And honestly, it would be great if our house started bringing in some extra cash to put towards the next trip. Because frankly, Ferris keeps screwing up in his job interviews. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. This is a CBC Podcast.

The following is a special presentation from the Debaters Fact and Funny Hall of Fame. Stay tuned for a classic episode airing for the very first time since its original broadcast season. Hey Canada, we're going to give her at the river. From the banks of the Thompson River in Kamloops. It's the debater. The debaters where comedians fight with facts and funny and this audience picks the winner. Now here's a man who's always live streaming. Steve Patterson.

Hey, hello, Canada! Welcome back to The Debaters. We're here in Kamloops, B.C., a city that is never short on things to do. That's not a joke. Every year, this town hosts the Kamloops Cowboy Festival, which features cowboys from all over. Now, some may be surprised to find out there are BC cowboys,

because they're used to Alberta cowboys. And of course, there are differences. The BC cowboy goes to more wine tastings. And therefore, spits out wine instead of tobacco. The BC Cowboy's job is also more difficult, as it's much harder to lasso and brand a spawning salmon. And the BC Cowboy has a different, and I think more politically correct, slogan,

save a horse, ride a bike. Now, are you ready to meet two people who are saddled up for laughter? Here we go. This comic barely escaped alive after mistakenly entering a cannibal's dispensary. It's Sterling Scott. Sterling Scott, there he is, waving hello as he crosses the stage to my right. And this comic can handle any butterfly emergency thanks to her training in chrysalis management. It's Erica Sigurdsson. Erica Sigurdsson. There she is. This topic is a perfect one for CBC listeners both here and across the country. Should we always correct other people's

grammar and spelling? This is very close to home for us on this show. Sometimes listeners will correct our grammar use on the show, but they can never correct our spelling. This script is full of spelling errors. Script is spelled with two S's and a K. Maybe we should have run this through Spillchuck. Spellcheck! Anyway, this one's sure to put a spell on you. So, whereas it helps with clearer communication, be it resolved, we should always correct other people's spelling and grammar. Erica, you are arguing for this,

please. You have two minutes, starting now. Thank you. Thank you. What harm really comes from correcting someone's grammar online? They unfriend you on Facebook? Perfect. I don't mind losing a few friends, especially ones that spell losing, loosing. Do I feel smug when I leave a little asterisk under someone's Facebook post correcting Y-O-U-R to Y-O-U apostrophe R? Of course I do, because it proves I'm just a bit better than them. But I'm out there on the front lines every day trying to save the English language, and my friends is a labor of love and that's labor with a U. Thank you. When someone posts on Facebook that they seen you go into the library yesterday it may seem innocent enough to let a few grammar mistakes slide under the guise of a typo or a burgeoning problem with alcohol.

But continue to let these slide, and the next thing you know, we are spelling enough with an F and accepting Valentine's Day cards with proclamations of L-U-V. Spoiler alert, ladies, if your man spells love L-U-V, he is 100% cheating on you and most likely has chlamydia. Which, ironically, is a really hard to spell STD. Thank you. Erica Sigurdsson is all for correcting spelling and grammar of other people all the time. She's not afraid to lose friends who can't spell.

Now, to tell us that correcting people's grammar and spelling is incorrect, it's the well-studied Sterling Scott. Now, this is a topic that has been up for debate for a long time, and I want to be clear with my words. No, I do not believe that one should always correct another person's spelling or grammar. But I do believe it should be done sometimes when clarification is required. But how have we as English speaking people become so arrogant about spelling and grammar when we have words like kernel pronounced K-E-R-N-E-L, but spelled C-O-L-O-N-E-L. We treat the English language like a Trudeau Halloween costume because we know it's not right, but we accept it anyways.

And let's be honest. Most of the time that people want to correct each other is not because they don't understand or need clarification on the message, but because they are pretentious and petty with a misguided sense of intellect that is used to undermine an individual or group so as to make yourself feel better about your miserable lives. Education does not indicate intelligence because the literacy rate in Canada is 99%, yet Doug Ford is still the premier of Ontario. Sterling Scott, ladies and gentlemen,

with some great points on why you shouldn't correct spelling all the time, but only when necessary, when it needs clarification. It's time now for the bare-knuckle round. We're debating whether you should correct people's spelling and grammar, so read my ellipses. Try to give your opponent compound fractures. We never prefix the outcome of this segment, so don't underestimate your opponent. That's a comma mistake. The object is to keep things impersonal yet subjective. And now, to infinitives and beyond. Now you see, Erica, you say you want to protect our sweet, sweet English language.

What's so sweet about a language that has so many conflicting rules? There are a lot of rules to the English language But there's also a lot of rules to driving You just learn them and you move on Yeah, you obviously haven't been to Montreal Is it wrong when you see someone making a mistake online? And also online, that's the only time on Facebook you can win an argument People go back and forth and finally you're just like apostrophe

R idiot. And then you move on. You said that you want us all to join you and the grammar police. Like are you serious? I don't know if you guys at home can see what's happening right now, but a blonde haired white woman is telling a young black man to join the grammar police.

What's next? She's going to have a sign that says, all grammar matters? Well, I think this is one of the times you just leave it for the editors to deal with. That's a good place to stop it. That's the bare knuckle round everybody We are debating whether you should be correcting people's spelling and grammar

All the time on The Debaters on CBC Radio 1 And we welcome your letters It is time now for the firing line In my hand I have a list of questions on correcting people's grammar Brought to you by the word dude. Dude. Pronouns before pronouns, bruh. A study by the University of Michigan found that those who are inclined

to correct people's grammar and spelling are more likely to be what? Erica? Left behind while the rest of the debaters go out for drinks. No, no, that's not true. Erica's having a real moment here. This is a real fear of Erica's. The actual answer was introverted. So it doesn't matter if we invite you out or not, Erica Queen's University's website

Uses the word squalor As an example of what? Sterling A group of Saskatchewan Roughrider fans Wow Incorrect Erica Vancouver Affordable Apartments

Well said Audience is given Two points for that Queen's University uses the word squalor As an example of a word that doesn't end With the Canadian O-U-R spelling Ooh Yeah

There are certainly other words That don't either But that's That's the one that Queen's University chose. Cat also doesn't end with E. Oh, you're right. In the 1631 reprint of the King James Bible, a typo occurred. Where?

Erica. Well, this is actually embarrassing for the Christian right, because it turns out it actually is Adam and Steve. That's solid. That's a four-point field goal right there. Sterling Scott. The last page says, to be continued. That's a good answer. I'll give a point for that. In the 1631 repin of the King James

Bible, the typo occurred here. In the Ten Commandments, it said, thou shalt commit adultery. So, little loophole for the horny husbands of the time. And that is the firing line, everybody. All right. It's homestretch time here at the Sagebrush, everybody. All right. It's home stretch time here at the Sagebrush Theater in Kamloops. Almost time for the audience to vote. But first, here again to tell us that grammar and spelling rules were meant to be broken, it's the evolving etymologist, Sterling Scott. All right.

Listen, people. Communication is about one thing. That's understanding each other. That's it. So if you don't need clarification on a message, then it doesn't need to be corrected. Look, this is how deep it got. The University of Michigan did a study on people who felt the need to correct grammar and spelling or who were irritated, found that these individuals were the least open-minded and had the least agreeable personalities which up until recently was only useful as a co-host on hockey night in canada sterling scott everybody sterling scott bringing it home, to tell us that her rules are I before E except after C, unless you're spelling her name, it's the detail-oriented Erica Sigurdsson.

Thank you. Shouldn't we learn from some of the travesties of the language that came out of English? The English-got-lazians decided to call HP sauce Brown Sauce, which is so weird because brown is definitely harder to spell than HP. I implore you, ladies and gentlemen, to stand with me, join my grammar police force, and help maintain the sanctity of our language.

I say this knowing full well at least seven CBC listeners will write in to point out grammar mistakes I have made. And to those precious people still sending handwritten letters, I say thanks, and not the one with the X. Erica Sigurdsson. On behalf of the Grammar Police, Sterling Scott against. Let's see how this audience decides. By applause, who thinks Erica's correcting grammar and spelling situation

spelled it out best? Erica Sigurdsson. Nice support here for Erica. And who thinks Sterling's anti-correction conclusion came correct? Sterling Scott. That's pretty close. It's a tie. We don't know whether you should correct

people's grammar all the time. Big hand for Erica Sigurdsleton and Sterling Scott, everybody. You're listening to The Debaters on CBC Radio 1. Want to be a part of the debating action? For upcoming tour dates, visit cbc.ca slash the debaters. Hi there, Steve Patterson here. You know, I travel a lot for work on my own, pwc.ca slash the debaters. Hi there, Steve Patterson here. You know, I travel a lot for work on my own,

so when I can do a trip where I get to bring my wife Nancy and our daughters along, I jump at it. On a recent trip to Ottawa, we booked an Airbnb. It was a nice home in a nice neighborhood, and it even had room for our dog Ferris, which was also nice. And that made me think, hey, maybe our home in Toronto would be a nice place to stay for some nice people too, since it sits empty while we're away. And honestly, it would be great if our house started bringing in some extra cash to put towards the next trip. Because

frankly, Ferris keeps screwing up in his job interviews. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. Hey there, I'm Kathleen Goltar, and I have a confession to make. I am a true crime fanatic. I devour books and films and, most of all, true crime podcasts. But sometimes, I just want to know more. I want to go deeper. And that's where my podcast, Crime Story, comes in. Every week, I go behind the scenes with the creators of the best in true crime.

I chat with the host of Scamanda, Teacher's Pet, Bone Valley, the list goes on. For the insider scoop, find Crime Story in your podcast app. Hey, Kamloops, are you ready to meet your next pair of debaters? Let's do it. This comedian found the ideal nudist camp Through Au Naturel selection It's Kamloops' own Ryan Williams There he is, Ryan Williams

His first time on The Debaters He looks very excited as he strides confidently to my right And this comedian's glow-in-the-dark sneakers Make him light on his feet It's one of our favorites, Tim Nutt. Tim Nutt, there he comes, taking his place to my left. Gentlemen, your topic springs from right here in the region, skiing and snowboarding. Are they really fun for the whole family? Now, it seems the ski slopes are the only place where you can meet one of those rescue St. Bernards with a brandy keg around its neck for

rescuing lost skiers. I personally think those dogs with booze around their necks should be available for all occasions. Like a Scotty that brings you a scotch after work. Or an Irish setter that brings you whiskey around its neck at work. Or for the next morning, a Portuguese water dog that brings you homemade Portuguese wine so you stop drinking. But we're not here to talk booze hounds. We're here to talk powder hounds. So whereas skiing and snowboarding Are beloved winter pastimes Be it resolved that a day on the slopes Is fun for the whole family Tim, you're arguing for this, please

You have two minutes, starting now Okay, take your family skiing That's the best thing you can do in the winter This is Canada Every single year, whether we pay our taxes or not The snow is coming Most people grab their snow shovels and complain, but us powder addicts, we rejoice because that's when the lifts open.

Skiing isn't for everyone, those that suffer from vertigo, people who live on the prairies and cowards. And snowboarding is for people who like being in the way of skiers. Exactly. Now, around my house, we take snow days. I call it the powder day flu. I pull the kids out of school, and we head up the mountain, and I'm 100% sure my kids will sit around fondly remembering

the times I made them go to school. We participate in full-on family bonding. It brings us closer together, and I will virtually ensure that when the time comes, my kids will put me in a decent retirement home. You got a problem, child? We don't know parenting stuff. You can't hit your kids anymore. But you can take them down a double black diamond. Let the mountain hit them. And what are you going to do in Canada in the wintertime besides go skiing or snowboarding? Hide in your house? Join a separatist party?

Real life in the flatlands is far too safe. Everywhere there are bubble-wrapped kids living their safe, boring lives. I say it's never too early to introduce the specter of real and present danger. Remember, people, it's never too early to get your children to fear Australian lift operators and trees. Thank you.

Tim Nutt. Tim Nutt says he should hit the slopes with the family. Thank you, Tim. Now, to tell us why he says nope to the slopes, it's anti-Alpine Ryan Williams. Oh, no! An avalanche of debt.

Yeah, Day at the Slopes is fun for the whole family except the parents paying for it. Maybe in the good old days when Tim was a boy and skis and chairlifts were still made of wood. Getting your family and vehicle ready is an ordeal. Boots with buckles, bindings, poles, chains. Sounds like a grocery list for an S&M dungeon. Which would be cheaper and gentler on your backside than falling on your butt ski. True story. While at Sun Peaks, I landed a spread-eagle atomic butt drop on a snow-covered boulder. Then, up the hill at Thompson Rivers University,

I had to sit on one of those pregnant lady donut pillows for two weeks in classes. Didn't meet a lot of girls a family trip up the hill can quickly turn to a family trip down to the ER between my sister and I we have suffered multiple concussions chipped teeth a broken wrist a torn ACL multiple concussions chipped teeth a torn ACL. Multiple concussions. Chipped teeth.

A torn ACL. And multiple concussions. If your family wants to do something dangerous and expensive this winter, go on a tropical vacation with American flags on your luggage. That's Ryan Williams, everybody. Yeah, nice job, young man. He is into it. He is into it.

His first ever opening argument for us, and it was a doozy. It is time now for the bare-knuckle round. We're debating whether nothing beats a day on the slopes. So we've traveled cross-country to bring you these two comedy moguls. Debaters, come up with a joke that's a black diamond in the rough as you wax poetically and make your opponent take a powder. This is your chance to freestyle, but it's snow time to let up on the pressure. On your telemark.

Get set. It's all downhill from here. The concussion thing explains a lot. I think what you were trying to say is my family is bad at skiing. And I know this is probably a Vancouver thing. and so you're talking to me about expenses. And I can take my children skiing because I don't live in a basement suite

in Vancouver. And from that context, it seems like a 12-inch subway is probably a big expense in your world. If you add bacon i'm done uh tim earlier said it is a it is a fun way to to hurt your child to take them on a double black diamond on moguls that is not cool at all i don't know if i brought this up but i have suffered

multiple concussions you did bring that up. Yes. And I might, I believe they might be affecting me in life. I certainly can't rebut this. We'll leave it there. That's the fair enough around. We are debating whether a day on the slopes

is fun for the whole family on CBC Radio 1 on the debaters or maybe you're listening on satellite radio or maybe on the app. It's time now for the whole family on CBC Radio 1 on the debaters, or maybe you're listening on satellite radio, or maybe on the app. It's time now for the firing line. In my hand, I have a list of questions

on spending a day on the slopes, brought to you by Swiss Chalet. Swiss Chalet. The alpine experience for those too chicken to ski. What was the name Sherman Pope originally gave to his invention,

the snowboard? Ryan. Snowboard. Well, you did sell it well. Performance every bit as important as the actual answer here. That's a point.

Tim. The unemployment-ator. Two points for that. The actual answer is the snurfer. I think Sherman Pope was Dr. Seuss. According to skiCanada.org, people involved in tech, sales, and teaching make up the bulk of skiers, while what employment group makes up the bulk of snowboarders? Tim. Ex-cons and roofers. I'll give you a point for that one.

It's unskilled labor. Makes up the bulk of snowboarders. We are not calling roofers unskilled. You've got to have some skills. They fall off and get concussions. I've actually had multiple concussions. That's why you bring that up. Yeah.

The Shotski. I've actually had multiple concussions. That's why you bring that up. Yeah. The shot ski, a device that enables four people to do a shot together off a ski, is known as what in Norway? Tim. Breakfast. Good answer. One point for that. Ryan Williams.

A brief escape from some misery. All right. The performance gets you a point and a half. It's actually called the schnopsky because it's traditionally done with schnapps. That's the firing line, everybody. It is almost time for our Kamloops Theater audience to pick a winner.

But first, here again to tell us that he isn't chill with the snowy hill, it's anti-altitude arguer, Ryan Williams. I would like to say sure. My opponent thinks a day on the slopes is fun family times. Maybe I'm just jealous because he's twice my age and has double the working knees that I do. Maybe you can have a fun day on the slopes. Then what? You have a family of addicts.

Your kids get hooked on fresh powder. The addiction to fresh pow-pow will have them acting insane. Oh, there's been a blizzard! 30 cm's of snow! The roads are treacherous! Let's drive up a mountain. Take this from me as a former powder addict.

Let me put it in terms your children may be speaking. I used to shred the north. I was a two-planker on twin tips. My backcountry lines were so sick. BC has the best skiing and boarding, so I'm trapped as bombers. So whack! There's a better way to have your children

avoid the prairies their whole lives. Thank you so much. Ryan Williams with a spirited closing argument against a day on the slopes, most of our listeners will need some sort of thesaurus for that final argument. Now, here again to tell us that you're dope if you don't love the slopes, it's certified ski bum, Tim Nutt.

Thank you. Being outside in the fresh air, that sounds nice, doesn't it? Add a little danger and high speed, awesome. Raising kids today is a little rough. We live in a world filled with distractions and screens, and I see the kids wandering the streets like zombies, tethered to their doodads and whatnots, and in my house, that's simply a summer thing.

Once the white stuff is on the ground, the nuthouse is on the move. We get bundled up, load up the skis, and head to the hills every chance we get. We're outside and charging hard, and that's the way we roll. And if anybody wonders if this is a good thing, my two daughters are back here, and they wanted to come see me kick this kid's ass doing this.

Want to come out? Oh, here come the next girls. Here's Tim Sutter. Lovely. Go away. And he just shooed them away, but they are here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll verify that for the listening audience at home.

His daughters were really here. Those are not paid actors. Hello, girls. That's it? Yeah, that's it. Thank you, Tim Nutt. Fun on the slopes for the whole family, and Tim brought the whole family here.

There you have it, Kamloops. It is up to you to pick a winner. By applause, who thinks that Tim's ski and snowboard sentences sold at the best? Tim Nutt A lot of love here for Timmy And who thinks Ryan's anti-ski trail railing sailed in this one? Ryan Williams

Whoa Whoa Well No need for a recount on that one. The audience has spoken. They do not think a day on the slopes is fun for the whole family. The winner is Kamloops' own Ryan Williams. Big hand for Ryan Williams and the one and only Tim Nutt, everyone.

Well, that's all for this week. I'm Steve Patterson saying when it comes to hitting the slopes this winter, be careful. Sometimes the slopes hit back. I'll argue with you again soon, Canada. Good night! The Debaters is created by Richard Side. This week's episode was produced by Nicole Callender,

Chloe Edbrook, Dean Jenkinson, and Graham Clark. Our classic debates were produced by Josh Bailey, Nicole Callender, Katie Ellen Humphries, Graham Clark. Our classic debates were produced by Josh Bailey, Nicole Callender, Katie Ellen Humphries, Graham Clark and Tracy Rideout. With technical production by Matthias Wolfson and Ross Bragg. Executive producer of CBC Radio Comedy is Lee Pitts.

And thanks to everyone at the Sagebrush Theatre in Kamloops. For more CBC Podcasts go to cbc.ca slash podcasts