The Debaters - Is Mother’s Day superior to Father’s Day? Is no one more impactful than a coach?

Episode Date: May 7, 2026

This Mother’s Day weekend, we’re pitting parental holidays against each other. Dave Hemstad says Mother’s Day is the mother of all holidays, but Elvira Kurt believes Father’s Day is far superior. Next, we’re seeing if a coach is a make or break mentor. Emmanuel Lomuro claims coaches can change lives, but Patrick Dussault is tired of these trainers.Featuring: Dave Hemstad, Elvira Kurt, Emmanuel Lomuro, and Patrick Dussault.

This week on two blocks from the White House, we're talking about a Supreme Court decision that could have a big impact on American elections. The decision narrows, some argue guts the Voting Rights Act of 1965, and it's expected to lead to a major redrawing of electoral maps. Join me, Paul Hunter, and my fellow Washington correspondence, Katie Simpson and Willie Lowry, as we break down U.S. politics from a Canadian perspective. Find and follow two blocks from the White House, wherever you get your podcasts, and watch us on YouTube. This is a CBC podcast. Hey, Canada, we'll never francophone it in. From the home of St. Bonifist, the Francophone neighborhood in Winnipeg.

It's the debater. It's fight with facts and funny, and this audience, picks the winner. Now here's a man who never asked you to pardon his French. Steve Batterson. Hey! To the debaters! And we are back in a city we always love coming to,

Winnipeg, a city where you can score some great deals. One place to get a good deal is the annual punk rock flea market. True story. The one-stop shop for all your used safety pin needs. The flea market is held at the Victoria Inn and Convention Center because nothing says punk rock like a convention center near the airport. Yes.

I didn't see anything I liked at first and I didn't want to be standing around like an American an idiot. But then I did find a couple things that clashed. Your reaction to that makes me wonder, should I stay or should I go now? Well, I'm staying for my go-to debaters to get Sid Vicious. So, this comic says if he were king, the fear of being overthrown would be a clear and peasant danger. It's Toronto's Dave Hemstead. Dave Hempstead, our Norse debating champion, Dave Hempstead. And this comic thinks jumping from rooftop to rooftop is par for the core. It's Toronto's Alvira Kurt.

Alvira Kurt coming out. Another of our favorites. Alvira Kurt. Thank you. Friends, your topic is one that comes with a parental warning. Mother's Day? Is it superior to Father's Day? Hmm.

It's about time. Somebody covered this. I'd like to refer to a question that my five-year-old daughter, Nora, asked me recently, which is, Daddy, why is there Father's Day and Mother's Day, but no, daughter's day?

And I replied, I don't know. But if there were a Daughter's Day, then shouldn't there also be a Son's Day? honey? And she replied, there is Sun's Day. It's right after Saturday. Then she patted me on the head and left the room. With those kind of self-assured puns, she'll be hosting this show very soon. Time now for a debate that's a mom and pop operation. So, whereas it's a day filled with beautiful gifts, loving meals, and a bigger celebration, be it resolved that Mother's Day is superior to Father's Day. Dave, you're arguing for this.

You have two minutes starting now, Dave Hempstead. Father's Day more important. Come on, get out of here. I'm a dad. Every day is my day. Have you heard of the patriarchy? In spite of some recent pushback, it's still doing just fine.

Mothers work their butts off all year raising kids, dressing them, washing them, washing and brushing their hair, making lunches, all the behind-the-scenes work so that dads can show people pictures of how nice their kids look. So, yeah, let's give Mum a day. Let's take a day.

Say, hey, good shift, Mom. Let's get you a brunch and some flowers, and let's hope that that stops you from feeling unappreciated for the next 364. Mother's Day saves marriages and keeps families intact. That's why everyone gets together for it. See, Mother's Day was born out of guilt.

And that's the kind of love that lasts. There's pressure to get Mother's Day right. You have to hit it out of the park or else. The whole family pulls their weight. And guess what? Pressure creates diamonds. Breakfast in bed, chores being done, kind words being used.

Yay, mum! There's no pressure on Father's Day. It takes very little effort to leave someone alone. Fun fact, Father's Day was created two years before Mother's Day to get men to admit they have children. There's no brunch or flowers for that, you see? Mother's Day brunch, they take over a banquet hall, fill it with all the foods you could possibly want,

and it costs $17 grand for a family of four. Father's Day breakfast is bacon and egg, coffee and toast, $4.99. which he eats alone on the way to the golf course. Because Father's Day is all about giving Dad a day to remember how easy his life was before he had a family. So, when it comes down to a battle of days, one must say, Mother Superior.

M's Dad, coming out swinging on behalf of Mother's Day. Thank you, Dave. Now, here to convince us that this, This debate resolution couldn't be father from the truth. Let's hear from the one and only Alvira Kirk. Four dads. This tiny lesbian apparently, how cocky they are. ...over their Manosphere of the Year with his breaking news

that moms are the real heroes to honor, adore, worship. Disney movie, then she's killed off before the credits and never ever mentioned again. Disposable baby mamas. Division of Darth Musk's evil natalist empire. Never mentioned again. Human moms. The ones Dave eviscerates with compliments so backhanded,

even Hannibal Lecter is like, chill, man. We moms know the score that Mother's Day isn't about us at all. It's a scam. Involsability. Thank you, women. Foods will go to to cover up their shortcomings. Ladies, sorry, you're so useless.

It's no secret. Day is just putting lipstick on the pig that is patriarchy. It's dad's annual get out of jail free card. Prostate exam for his soul. He's one thing. Failure. Possible gift compares. Let's let Mommy sleep in tomorrow.

This is in it. No one his day is. A father's day. card. Sure, I'll sign it. What a no-brainer. Thank you. Yeah. We got ourselves a debate. Let's move on now to the bare knuckle round. We're debating Mother's Day versus Father's Day, so don't end up Dad in the Water in this mother of all debates. And while winning and losing is all relative, no one wants a tie. Thanks. Thanks a brunch. All right, you two, a couple of cards.

It's time to think outside the toolbox, starting now. All right, Dave, that was an excellent argument for you. I agree. Mom's are superhuman, but so are dads, right? Think of all the expired food you guys finish. True. Usually, I'm kind enough to ask, is anyone going to eat this before I do it?

Like a gentleman, but this isn't a debate about whether moms or dads are better people? It's about which day is more important. And of course Mother's Day is, the saying is, happy wife, happy life. No one ever says, happy dad, life's not so bad. You're right. You're absolutely right, except moms are not happy. She's lying for the kids' sake, okay? That's why we let you sleep in.

Really get to sleep in. A good five months. minutes after you sneak out of the bedroom and the whole house is like, mom, mom, everyone, the family walking around a darkened house stumbling into the kitchen. What happens in this room? Except for one glorious day each year. Listen, you know, you're making strong points for Mother's Day for sure, but dads deserve it too. I mean, moms, yeah, we get a day because we're such amazing multitaskers, but so are dads. It's like think of all your unfinished projects.

That's a... Like, there's a lifetime's worth you guys will never get to. Easy to manage? So don't waste a whole day. Dads don't need a whole day. Give us a high five. We're good.

That's it. Way to go, Dad. Nice job. Thanks, kids. Boom. You can save a whole Sunday in June. You just want to know how badly you screwed up that you had to take the Mother's Day side.

Do you want to hear me say it? Do you want to hear me say it? I'm sorry, I'm so useless. All right. All right. That's the bare knuckle round. It's time now to the firing line in my hand. I have a list of questions on Mother's Day versus Father's Day,

brought to you by the new film, Father Time versus Mother Nature. Father Time versus Mother Nature. Time is not on her side. Readers digest five symbols. Simple tips for hosting the Perfect Mother's Day brunch are, get inspired, do work in advance, play up the basics, remember the drinks, and what else? Alvira.

Brace yourself for criticism. Ha! Ha! Like that? You didn't do it right, whatever you did. You didn't do it right. That's an official point. Day.

You'll do all those things and then also remember to invite mom. That's... crossed all the teas, but didn't doubt the eye. That's a good point. The answer was, don't disregard casseroles. The tagline for the 2016 film Mother's Day is, come and celebrate the mother of all holidays. What's the tagline of the 1997 film Father's Day?

Alvira. He who smelt it, dealt it. That's great. Two and a half points. Dave Hempstead. One man struggled to take it easy. All so good. No, wait, that's Ferris Bueller's Day off.

Two points. That's pretty close. Father's Day was, we're going to need a bigger beer. Oh, that's good, too. Two points. The tagline of the 1997 film Father's Day was the reason why some animals eat their young. I'm going to go back and watch that now. New York Times.com.

says sandals are a great Father's Day gift as long as they're what? Dave. Tape to a bottle of whiskey. Oh, three points. Three points. Alvira Kurt. Paired with white socks.

Nice. That's a nice combo. Yep. Incorrect, but so close. It says, uh, San Diego. Sandals are a great Father's Day gift as long as they're not dorky. That's the firing line, everybody. We are cruising right along here in a great debate,

Mother's Day versus Father's Day, and it's almost time for our Jubilee Place theater audience to vote. But first, here again to tell us why the hippest, coolest day is Father's Day. Daddy-o, let's hear again from Alvira Kurt. Kids, when Mommy smiles at you while choking down that burnt coffee and black and toast you made for her with Daddy's health, That's no act of love. It's a metaphor.

Each bitter gulp is easier to swallow than the sad reality that once her day is over, she alone keeps the family on track. Mom's joy? Well, let's just say orgasms aren't the only things she takes. Let's get to come and go or sit and fart or fart and go or burp and fart or fart and fart until death do they part. Who has the better day?

Ask the two knuckleheads up here who didn't have to arrange child care for this stupid debate. Oh, dear, Kurt. Oh, yeah. Now, to tell us why Mother's Day is a celebration that he'll never stay mum about, let's hear again from Dave Hampstead.

Mother's Day was made official by President Woodrow Wilson in 1914. That was back when women didn't even have a vote. You were not considered to be, you know, full citizens. Not wholly developed people who could exercise critical thought. I know. Crazy, right? So can you imagine the amount of noise that old Woody and his pals were dealing with backstage

to have to declare a Mother's Day? You didn't get a vote, and we didn't. chose it for you. That's how much more important it is. It's a much more important day because mothers should be celebrated more than fathers. To prove my point, when I asked my daughter Vivian, hey kiddo, give me a couple of reasons why Father's Day is more important than Mother's Day. She stopped brushing her teeth, looked at me, and said, it's not. The defense rests. Dave Hempstead.

I like that. Good argument. All right, audience, it is up to you. This has been a hard-fought debate, and it's time to vote. How many of you pretty much matched Dave's Mother's Day musings, Dave Hampstead? Okay. A lot of love there. And how many of you found more fun in Elvira's?

Father's Day fanaticism, Alvira Kurt. The winner, the winner is Elvira Kurt, ladies and gentlemen. It's for Father's Day. Father's Day's more important. Thanks Alvira. Big hand for Dave Hempstead and Alvira Kurt, everybody. Hey debaters fans, want to be a part of the debating action? Then come to a live taping.

For details on upcoming tour dates, visit our website at cbc.ca. Slash the debaters. Look, you may have noticed that it wasn't just the outfits that people were talking about when it comes to this year's Met Gala, but the politics surrounding fashion's biggest event. I'm Alameh Mammu, and this week on my podcast, commotion, we're talking about billionaire Jeff Bezos and his wife, Lauren Sanchez, co-chairing this year's Met Gala, which managed to upset activists and fashion insiders. Check out the conversation that I had with fashion critics about how billionaire involvement changed the Met Gala. You can find and follow commotion on YouTube or wherever you get you. your podcasts. All right, Winnipeg, and it's got one question for you.

Are you ready to meet your next pair of debaters? Listen to that, Canada. Yeah. This comic doesn't need a comedy manual to be funny. It's Winnipeg's Emmanuel Lomero. First-time debater, Emmanuel Lomero. Thank you so much for that. Thank you.

And this comic says, I do so make the audiences laugh. It's Toronto's. Patrick Dusso! Patrick Dusso! There he is. Welcome back, my friend. All right, gentlemen, let's get to this. Your topic is one that is fresh from the playbook,

coaches. Are they the most impactful figures in life? Coaches! My daughter, Scarlett, participates in artistic swimming, formerly known as synchronized swimming. And I'm not going to lie, I don't know how her coach stays cool when coaches of other sports say,

artistic swimming isn't a real sport. And if I were coach of her team, I would reply by throwing them into the pool and seeing if they could make it out, artistically or otherwise. It's time now for a debate that we hope will bring home the win. So, whereas they can improve your performance in a sport, provide strong leadership,

and even be a source of inspiration, be it resolved, there's no one more impactful than a coach. Emmanuel, you are arguing for this, please. You have two minutes, starting now, Emmanuel Lomero. Thank you, Steve. There is no one more meaningful or impactful in your life than a coach. Think about every decision you've made on your own without consulting anybody.

Every bad haircut, every questionable outfit. And let's not forget your ex, remember, the one? Yeah. Imagine you had a coach to sit you down and say, hey, let's take a timeout. this one might not be it, you know? One of the most impactful skills that I've learned in my life is the power of a nickname.

I played basketball in college, and my basketball coach taught me the power of a nickname. He used to give every player on the team nicknames. He was a little bit older, so I should say they weren't racist, but they weren't not. A couple of the most memorable ones. He used to call myself and my cousin the Black Panthers.

Yeah, this was before the movie, so he was thinking about the jump. Yeah, he was, yeah. There was an Asian player on our team. He used to call him Crouching Tiger. But this is what he would do. He'd cover it with a compliment. He used to get real low on defense, is what he said.

He was a real low player. That's what he was. There was a Jewish player on our team. He used to just call him Moses. He said he would leave us to the promised land of a championship. That was his thought process there. In conclusion, the impact of a coach is more than just day to day. It lasts a lifetime. Thank you.

Yeah. Emmanuel Lumeril with his first debate for us, saying there is no one more impactful than the coach. Now, here to tell us that being anti-coach is right out of his playbook. Let's hear from Patrick Dousseau. Folks, there's an adage in professional sports that says coaches are hired to be fired. Which not only implies an expectation of failure, but also a disposability. usually reserved for diapers, syringes,

and the art your kids bring home from school. Now, if you're wondering why that is, look no further than another popular sports euphemism, the coaching carousel. Now, you see, like a carousel, a team is the end result of a complex network of experts and professionals working together behind the scenes to create an entertaining product that lasts for decades.

A coach is the dim-witted child who gets on the carousel and thinks that he makes the horsey go up. down. Look, mommy, I made Connor McDavid do a goal. Sure you did, Pumpkin. Coaches are so interchangeable that teams literally have to issue a press release to let fans know when they've hired a different doughy middle-aged white guy with the resting facial expression of a dog who's just been asked to explain algebra. Now, look, far be it for me to minimize the impact of what basically amounts to a make-a-wish program for adults who aren't sick. But I can't help but think there are a few more inspiring figures to today's pro athletes,

specifically the figures in their bank accounts. Professional athletes don't play for love of the game. They play to get paid. That's because in the absence of any other employable skills, they need to make as much money as they can now so that they don't have to debase themselves in retirement by becoming a coach. Patrick Dousseau, ladies and gentlemen. Patrick Dousseau.

Yes. All right, we got ourselves a debate, and we're going to keep going with it. We are debating whether no one is more impactful than a coach. So let me tell you the Tommy Lasorda thing we're looking for here. Don't Scott Arniel to your opponent. Make a Paul Maurice for the top. And try to Casey Stoney them. That's the women's national soccer team coach.

Look at it! Time to prove you're mentally stronger than them. Starting now. I think listening to Manuel, it's clear that he's into coaches because he doesn't want to make mistakes, but mistakes are the reason that I'm now a happily married father. Yeah. How many kids and how many wives? Look, that's why people prefer to be happily single.

Oh, yeah, well, that's why I'm mired in mountain-crushing debt. See, if you had me as your financial coach, I could help with that. I mean, listen, I didn't have the benefit of a casually racist coach to teach me about that. I had to learn about casual racism the old-fashioned way by being a straight white man with immense and limitless privilege. I'd like to take this moment to defend my coach and say that he was not racist, but he wasn't not, not racist. All right, that's the bare knuckle round, everybody. we're debating coaches on the debaters. Time now for the firing line in my hand.

I have a list of questions on coaches, brought to you by private jets. Private jets, because elite coaches don't fly coach. WGcoaching.com's list 101 coaching tips includes believe in your athletes, never stop learning, and set aside time each day to do what? Patrick.

bet on the game through an untraceable third party. Strong point. Two points there. Emmanuel. Always pick more black kids. That's what my coach did. I'm going to give you a point for that. The actual answer was,

take care of your personal health and fitness. Good try, everybody. In 2003, Manchester, United Soccer star David Beckham was injured when his coach did what? Patrick? Walked in on him bending it like Beckham, if you know what I mean. Emmanuel? Claims sporty spice was the best spice.

That was good answer too. Two points. Yeah? David Beckham was injured when his coach kicked a stray shoe in anger and it struck Beckham in the head. According to trustedcoaches.org, when coaching youth sports don't focus on the negative, Don't intimidate and don't what? Manuel.

Worry about the first two. Nice. There we go. Two points. Patrick Dousseau. Invite everyone over for a slumber party afterwards. Yeah. Don't do that either.

Don't do that. That was a great reaction crowd. One point for you. Don't focus on the negative. Don't intimidate and don't prioritize winning. That's dumb. That's just a dumb thing. That's the firing line.

Everybody, yeah. Well, it's almost time again for our jubilant Jubilee Place Theater audience to vote. But first, here again to tell us why he thinks that all coaches should be sidelined. Let's hear again from Patrick Dousseau. Folks, if coaches were really instrumental to a player's success,

I'd currently be enjoying my recent retirement for Major League Baseball instead of standing behind the lectern at a comedy debate. Growing up, I had the pastor. I had the dedication, and between the high school and rep teams I played for, Lord knows I had the coaching. But in a world with over 73,000 brain surgeons and only 700 Major League Baseball players, it turns out that the only thing I really needed to make it to the show was the one thing no coach could ever give me.

Actual talent. And that reminds me of another popular sports adage. Those who can do, those who can't teach, and those who can't teach, coach. Thank you very much. Patrick Juso, ladies and gentlemen. Now, here to tell us why he thinks that the Coachella Festival should be a festival celebrating coaches. Let's hear again from Emmanuel Lomero.

I firmly believe no one is more impactful than a coach. Coaches teach, inspire, impact our lives. We know this and we trust this. Why else would parents drop their children off to a stretch? with a bag full of balls every week if they didn't understand the impact that they were creating for our adults of tomorrow. Patrick will sit there and say, no, coaches have no value in today's society. But I pose this thought to you.

Would you rather drop your children off to a stranger with a bag full of balls or a stranger without a bag at all? Thank you. Emmanuel Lomero making a strong point on behalf of coaches that is it. It is time for our audience to vote by applause. Who felt that listening to Emmanuel's coaching kudos

improved their performance as audience members? Emmanuel Lomero! And who agreed with Patrick that when it comes to the idea of needing a coach, sadly that trainer has left the station, Patrick Dousseau? A well-fought battle on each side, but I got to give this one with the hometown crowd

in front of his hometown in his premier debate to Emmanuel Lomeroil everybody. Well, that's all for this week. I'm Steve Patterson saying to all my former baseball coaches, it's your fault. I didn't make it to the pros. I'll argue with you again soon. Canada. Good night.

The debaters is created by Richard Side. This week's episode was produced by Nicole Callender, Chloe Edbrook, Dean Jenkinson, and Graham Clark. With continuity by Graham Clark, Diana Francis, and Gary Jones. Technical production by James Pirella, May MacKillop, and Lloyd Peterson.

Story editing by Gary Jones. With special thanks to Katie Ellen Humphreys, David Pride, and Emily Ferrier. Executive producer of CBC Radio Comedy is Lee Pitts. And thanks to everyone at the Jubilee Place Theatre and the Winnipeg Comedy Festival. For more CBC podcasts, go to cBC.ca.ca slash podcasts.