The Debaters - The Debaters Introduces: Personal Best Season 3

Episode Date: September 16, 2024

Personal Best is a podcast that celebrates small ambitions, half-wins and the quiet satisfaction of getting less bad at things. Each week they help ordinary people work through the little things they���d never bring to a life coach — like having the courage to dine alone at a fancy restaurant or getting less awkward at handshakes. Let them be your self-improvement sidekicks! More episodes from the brand new season of Personal Best are available at: https://link.chtbl.com/LenrN6rP

Hi there, listeners. Steve Patterson here. If you're a frequent traveler like I am, you know that traveling's great. But as a wise young girl with fancy red shoes once said, there's no place like home. That's why when I travel, by myself or with my family, I often book Airbnbs for that homey touch. Like the one I stayed at in Stratford, Ontario recently, where I performed a show and took in some Shakespeare.

Though to be clear, I didn't perform Shakespeare. There's no perchance of that happening. I was not meant to be, or not to be. Anyway, my point is, I like the feeling of home when I'm on the road, and I feel like I'm not alone in this, especially when I'm traveling with my family, which got me thinking, when we're on the road, our house could be a home away from home for fellow travelers, too, if we host it on Airbnb. It just makes sense. Actually, it makes dollars. And those dollars could help pay for our next family trip. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca slash host.

Something to prepend on and on. This is a CBC Podcast. Hey, folks. I'm Rob Norman. I'm Andrew Norton. This is a brand new season. Yeah, that's right. And we want to share the first episode of that new season with you right now. It's about a guy named Will who is having a commitment crisis. Not with his girlfriend, not with his job, but rather a stranger who works behind the counter at his favorite shawarma spot. It's funny, it's heartfelt, and we hope you like it. Here it is. Hello?

Hi, is this Dairy Queen? Yep. Do you do custom ice cream cakes? Yes, so it would be an ice cream cake base, and then it'd have our icing on top of it. Oh, great. Because I'm looking for a cake that says, After five years, we're back, baby. Okay. Is that doable?

Probably. Let me write it out and see what the spacing would look like on a cake real quick. So that was after five years, we're back, baby? No. After five years, we're back baby no after five years we're back baby like so it should be b a dash b y got it yeah we could do that awesome i'm rob norman i'm and Norton. And this is Personal Best. It's tough to make a comeback.

Whether you're preparing to re-enter the job market, or searching for the perfect picture of you petting a dog to update your Tinder profile, getting back out there can be hard. Maybe five years ago, you created a self-improvement podcast where each week you help someone overcome a seemingly invisible problem in their life. And now after a long hiatus, you're making your first episode back. Whatever the reason, a comeback means returning to a room that you left and also facing the reason why you left that room in the first place. Whether that be fear, rejection,

failure. What's more rare is having to make a comeback because things were going too well. Hey Will. How are you? Nice to meet you. I'm Andrew. Meet Will. There's a few things you'll immediately notice about Will. His short blonde hair, his Canadian Football League shirt, and he radiates the type of relaxed charm you could only cultivate growing up in a small town. A small town that had all the amenities. There was a convenience store there in like the 80s, I think. It's like now, just dirt. He'll happily tell you about his love of video games or his childhood where he obsessed over Lord of the Rings.

And I think I reread those books like a gajillion times. What you wouldn't know is that recently, Will has gone through a terrible, agonizing breakup. With a local shawarma restaurant. Oh yeah, it was like some crappy romantic movie. I guess this would have been like 2016, I had this shawarma place that I loved. Will's always been an aficionado of vertically roasted rotisserie meats. But for him, this place was something special.

They have like the traditional shawarma ingredients and stuff. I don't know, like tabbouleh, tahini, all that stuff. But Will was also charmed by the more unusual toppings, like shredded cheese. I was like, man, you guys are literally just going to the convenience store and just buying Tex-Mex. And you like that. These are your people. These are my people, yeah. Loved it. Early in their courtship, Will is eating there all the time. It's right by his house, and he develops a rapport with the guy working behind the counter. And the guy's like, oh, like, do you want some cheese?

I was like, cheese it up, daddy. Like, let's do this. Each time he visits, the guy recognizes Will. Then I went in again. He's like, hey, Will, the funny guy. At this point, Will realizes he's become a regular at his favorite shawarma spot. And because of that fact, he can never set foot in that restaurant again. Why? It was going so well. He was funny

cheese dude. Expectations. Yeah, you're right. It's just like the expectation that I have to do something. Like, I just want the shawarma. You know, if I'm in a good mood, you know, I'll pal around. But like, I, yeah, I hate that feeling of just being like, I have to be me, but like not the me if I'm in a good mood, I'll, you know, pal around, but like I, uh, yeah, I hate that feeling of just being like, I have to be me, but like not the me that I am in that moment.

The me that is in your head. And I don't want to let him down because he wants the cheese dude. He wants the cheese dude to come in, right? Will has to pass that restaurant every day when he walks home from work. So he does what any rational person would do.

I literally would go to the other side of the street because I didn't want them to see me. I'd be standing on the other side of the street just wistfully like, you know, like it was just some like old lover that I just really wanted to be with again. Like so mournful, like I want that shawarma back, but I can't like face these dudes again because they're nice to me. And like they were like genuinely interested in me. And I was like, nope, can't do it. Can't go in there. You would sooner not go to your favorite, possibly the best shawarma you've ever eaten.

You'd rather cut that out of your life than to let them down. Yeah. I noticed this as I got older, when I start getting like too familiar with like people or places, I avoid them. And it's just like spilled over into so many other aspects of my life. Like I remember I quit a job because they wanted to promote me. That's pretty weird, right? Hey, you're doing a great job. Let's promote you. Like, see you later. The deeper the relationship, the more Will worries about letting the other person down. Even if that other person is holding a squeeze bottle of garlic sauce. Maybe a little bit worried that I'll screw it up or say something stupid and then somebody will end up hating me once they get to know me.

Will wants to prove that he won't be scared away by commitment any longer. I should be able to enjoy the things that I like without succumbing to huge amounts of anxiety because I'm afraid of people knowing who I am. At the end of this process, Will has changed. What does that Will look like? Six foot five, abs, and he's not

afraid to go get shawarma if he wants it. Okay, we can maybe do the shawarma part. Yeah, let's try that. So far, Will has been running away from relationships whenever he feels overwhelmed. If we're going to help him, we need to teach him how to do the opposite of running away. Standing perfectly still. Making a commitment. Normally, if I was struggling with commitment, I'd just ask my therapist.

But every time I try and hang out with Michael, he always wants me to pay him afterwards. So instead, I've asked people on the internet to find out from their therapists, why is commitment so hard? And report back to me. They said it's about the way we think about life as like a series of open doors.

When you make a commitment, you are closing some of those doors and settling in and admitting this is what my life is. And that's scary. It's making peace with the idea that you don't ever really overcome a fear. You might get more comfortable over time, but ultimately there's always that twinge. Staying in something, you get to, it's kind of like a video game that takes a really long time, you get to other levels where you're like, wow, it took a really long time to get here, but it's pretty rewarding when you do, unless it isn't. So I posed the question, why is commitment so scary?

Her answer immediately was because it can't be undone. It's permanent and permanent somehow breeds anxiety. See, then I had a debate. I was like, well, not all commitment is permanent, but that's the initial anxiety, right? But anxiety is not rational. Most of the time, the logical conclusion is not as bad as the picture that we've painted in our head. Her question was, are you going to die? You know, is the thing that you're committing to going to kill you?

Like, what's the worst that can happen? That's the sound of me running. I'm running because I am trying to get my head around something. And maybe you could try with me. Forget jogging around the block, a 5K, even a marathon. I want you to think about running for 48 hours, sometimes in the rain, sometimes in blistering heat, or even across the South Pole. I mean, there's no way to get through an ultra marathon without punishment. An ultra marathon, a race spanning up to 160 kilometers. Sometimes even further than that. So, you know, I've run for 48 hours without sleeping. And, you know, you go into a slow state of decline. Your muscles tighten up, your guts tighten up, or they get loose, which is even worse.

This is Dean Karnasas, New York Times bestselling author and ultramarathon runner. Dean has run over a dozen of these. And if Will's issue is commitment, this is a man who is unafraid to commit to something that seems impossible. And I really just have one question for him. Why does someone do this? Why? I've written five books to try to answer that question, and I'm not entirely sure. But I think the first battle is just having the courage to start, you know, be at the starting

line, you know, just showing up and knowing that you're going to do something that is going to destroy you. Because if you think about the finish line, if you think about how much further you have to go, it's just overwhelming. So I think it's the personal challenge. An ultramarathon is really a battle against yourself. This is why I phoned up Dean, because to me, that's what commitment is, a battle against yourself. Convincing yourself to stick to something, even when it gets uncomfortable or feels impossible. I've never run an ultramarathon, but I've had days where I'm dead tired, nothing left in the tank, and I still got to be a good dad or take out the trash or whatever life thing I have to do. But here's the tricky part. There's also uncomfortable, seemingly impossible things

you face in life that aren't worth sticking out. Do you know the difference between the feeling of I'm about to die and I only feel like I'm about to die, keep going. Is that something you have to parse? I'm the wrong person to ask that question because I've literally, you know, collapsed on a run from complete exhaustion. Times where I thought I just, there's no way I can take another step and somehow run another, you know, 20 or 30 kilometers. All I think about is taking my next footstep to the best of my ability. You can get through incredibly tough situations by just focusing on just one step, one step, one step. Sometimes I'll do that for two or three hours.

And all of a sudden, you know, look up and there's the finish line. But if Will is running a marathon, he still has a long way to go. To prove to Will that commitment is possible, I'm committing to run for one full hour. Okay, here goes nothing. All right. And nothing is going to stop me from accomplishing this goal. All right, we nothing is going to stop me from accomplishing this goal. All right, we are jogging. Oh, I think I'm gonna puke. I just had three sandwiches.

Yeah, they were small, but still had three sandwiches. Okay, that's all I can do. Five minutes? Are you kidding? Oh, my God. Okay, commitment is hard. Good luck with this, Will. Good luck, buddy. Good luck, buddy. Good luck.

This episode, we're helping a shawarma lover named Will overcome his deep fear of commitment so he can return to his favorite restaurant. Exactly, yes. I remember standing on the street and I was staring at the shawarma place and I was like, I can't, I can't do it. So we've spoke with an ultramarathoner and solicited secondhand therapy. And none of that worked. So I sought out adult men interested in long-term friendship. And I'm signing up Will for the biggest commitment possible. A new best friend, all without telling him. Welcome to the new reality show, Friendship is Blind. Will's about to meet potential friends through a partition, and using conversation alone, must decide which complete stranger he will begin a lifetime of friendship with. Sight unseen.

This is surprisingly nerve-wracking. Would you like to take this relationship to the next level? Best friends? That's a big step for me. I'm just, I'm too nervous. What if I don't like it? The stakes have been raised. This could be a moment. Would you be interested in being my best friend?

Before we get started, let's meet some of our hot and sexy platonic suitors. I'm Abby. I work in construction. I'm here to build a solid relationship. Next up, bartender Cole. My name is Cole, and I am new to the city, but I'm not new to making friends. Finally, every reality show has its resident bad boy. Ours is a school administrator named Ned. The best part about shawarma, period, is among the foods you can get quickly, it's loaded with the most vegetables. The ratio of chicken to vegetables is one to one.

That to me is a good shawarma. Class is in session, boys. Now it's time for a bunch of random adult men to befriend each other through conversation alone. The partitions are in place. The suitors can't see each other, and the pods are now open. First up, it's Abby. Hello? Hey, are you my potential friend?

New friend, how are you? Not so bad, yourself? Pretty good, man. Cool. Where are you from, Abby? I grew up in the Middle East, in a small town just like 100 kilometers away from the main city. Yeah, how about you? I'm also from a small town. Oh, beauty, whereabouts?

I love how you say, town. Oh, beauty. Whereabouts? I love how you say, yeah, oh, beauty. I feel like every small town person says something like, oh, beauty, eh? Seems to be some pretty intense chemistry there. Oh, right on. Yeah, yeah, bud. But before Will settles down, he has to meet his next suitor. Hello.

How's it going? I gotta assume this is Cole? Yes. I'm Will. Nice to meet you, Will. What are you looking for in a friend? Will and Cole might be off to a great start, but our next contestant, Ned, knows the food of love for Will is the food Will loves. There's a shawarma place right around the corner from my grocery store, so that's my sort of treat every week is a nice big shawarma. Do you like shawarma?

Love it. Absolutely love shawarma. The shawarma place that I go to tends to load it up pretty well. Oh, cool. love shawarma the shawarma place that i go to tends to load it up pretty pretty well oh cool i reached a point where it could have been a crisis with the shawarma place where um i was going regularly enough that they were talking to me like they recognized me and for me that made me really nervous i'm like oh no i'm here so regular like and so my my instinct was well i can't eat there anymore. Are you kidding me?

Will has found a shawarma commitment phobic soulmate. And I swear we didn't plan this. I would suggest going back, seeing if you can rekindle that. Because it ended up being sort of a good move. Because it's nice to have a place where you can just go in and they know what you want. Over the next couple hours, our contestants go from pod to pod, engaging in deep conversation. I guess you know Magic the Gathering? Yeah.

Okay, I don't. I tried to learn it. Do you play video games? I get too nervous to play new games, and I find myself repeating it. Too nervous? That's the excitement of it. I'm just, I'm too nervous. If I had to choose my favorite fantasy world, it would be Lord of the Rings. I love that. Oh my god, yeah. Do you watch the CFL at all? I don't watch the CFL.

Oh. The thing with the CFL is, yeah, we. Do you watch the CFL at all? I don't watch the CFL. Oh, the thing with the CFL is, yeah, like, we're kind of lacking. It's the final round, but Will can only accept one friendship proposal. Each of Will's potential suitors has picked out a real engagement ring. We bought them off Amazon. And if any of them truly believes there's friendship outside of this podcast, they may ask Will to be their real-world best friend forever, completely sight unseen. I thought Cole was probably somebody they could probably, like, hang out with a bit more.

But one of the guys had the exact same issue with me with a shawarma place, so, I don't know, it was just nerve-wracking. It's now time for these adult men to propose friendship. Could Ned be Mr. Right? Uh, this is surprisingly nerve-wracking. Have you decided to propose? Yes, I am prepared to do so. This could be a moment.

Ned is ready to pop the question, but he isn't the only one. Uh, I'm a nervous wreck. Wait a minute. One thing we didn't anticipate was having two men pursue Will's friendship. Yeah, I didn't really think that far ahead. And he doesn't like commitment. What if he just says no to both these people? We did this whole

thing for him and everything. Huh. Well, Ned's up first. He walks in, ring box in hand, and he's back out again. Will has turned down Ned. This is not looking good. Next up is Cole. I just wanted to come over and say how much fun it has been to talk and hang out with you.

I have a question for you. Would you be interested in being my best friend? Sure, man. Let's give it a shot. I'm down. With that unwaveringly enthusiastic response, Will emerges from behind the partition to see Cole, on one knee, a $34 cubic zirconia sparkling in his hands. I guess I gotta put this on. Yeah, you gotta put it on. All right. I got a new friend. Yeah, absolutely. New best friend. Yeah. What better way to kick off their new commitment than a romantic island getaway?

Lucky for us, Paradise is only a short Uber ride from the studio. We're at the ferry terminal here. We're going to have a little best friends beach day. I'm excited. We have a full day of fun in the sun planned for these newly minted BFFs. And we made them matching t-shirts that say Long Term Friends. Are these just like electrical tape that you guys cut out to make letters? Unfortunately, there's no time to fawn over handcrafted typography.

We have a schedule packed full of summertime events. But according to the novelty-sized map at the visitor's kiosk... So where are we? We're right here? We are a long way from the beach. Jesus. Should we rent a bike? We're way ahead of you, Will, because our associate producer, Emily, has a special surprise waiting for you, too.

It's a tandem bike. Tandem bike. Thinking about it? I'm so scared. But before you know it... All right, we got this. We're good. They're cruising.

Okay. Just a couple of men wearing matching friendship shirts on a bright red tandem bike. Not a care in the world. Two best friends on a tandem bike. Two best friends on a tandem bike. Two best friends on a tandem. Two best friends on a tandem. Most importantly, Will hasn't tried to sneak away once.

You would never believe they just met on a reality show about male friendship. This is actually really, really nice. They sail down the winding streets of the island on their bicycle built for two, zipping past quaint summer homes. These are amazing. I feel like we're in human Hobbiton. Dude, literally. Is it called Hobbiton?

Hobbiton. It's called the Shire. Well, whatever. Hobbiton. I think that, no, the Shire is the area. After getting very lost, they find the part of the beach we marked on their map. This is the beach here. Is it?

Yeah, this is it. Waiting for our brand new bosom buddies is a picnic blanket and a full spread of charcuterie. The sun is just about to set. You ready to picnic? I'm taking my shoes off. I'm taking my shoes off. I'm taking my shoes off. What about socks? Socks off, yeah.

Socks off? We also bought the boys something special to christen their friendship. Cheers. To a thriving new tandem bicycle friendship. Reclining on a dollar store towel, bubbly in hand, they finally have some time to take it all in. You want to know what's funny? What?

It's only the second time I've ever picnicked on the beach. Really? Uh-huh. But it's not long before the topic turns to Will's fear of commitment. Remember when I was saying that I lived at that apartment where you could see the planes taking off? Yeah. So there's this shawarma place just down the street,

and it's like literally every shawarma place I've gone to, I have to keep going to a new shawarma place because I have one good day, and then they expect me to be me all the time. Oh, I see. You know what I mean? This is where one of my favorite quotes comes in. Being near the beach is very appropriate. A boat is safe at port, but that's not what a boat is built for.

Everybody experiences this. Sometimes the anxiety is worse than what the good thing is. And that's the worst part, is I'll be like, this isn't that bad. But you can't tell how you feel. How's the shawarma, though? Fantastic. See, then there you go. You're going through an awkward moment to get to a good thing.

It sounds like Will is on the verge of a major breakthrough. Perhaps this new friendship is the answer to the emptiness that we all... Holy shit, it's a pirate ship! You see that pirate ship? Oh, damn. It's the friend ship. Cole, you're my first mate. Aye, aye, captain.

Aye, aye, captain. You know, is that one of those booze cruise ships, though? I don't know. Did you ever play the game Sea of Thieves? No, what's that? Oh, yeah, it's a video game. Yeah, I thought it was a drinking game. I'm thinking like flip the cup or something.

Oh, no, it's the sea of thieves. Our boys are having a blast, splashing around in the lake, but we realize it's time to head home, which, in our case, is the CBC Studios. So I'm going to leave the lights on. So you have five minutes of just quiet hangout time, and then we're going to turn out the lights. Okay.

Okay, guys? And you guys can talk. I don't want to hear any wrestling, okay? No yelling. Rob brought sleeping bags into the studio and made them change into their pajamas. I actually think I could fall asleep right now. What a day.

I took a sick day for this. That's hilarious. Cole? Cole, I know you're having fun you had a fun day today but it's lights out yep no more talking okay guys alright goodnight Rob goodnight guys

I'm sure as Will lays his head down to think back on the wonderful day he's experienced there's absolutely no worries about his latest commitment at all. Yeah, definitely. But what if I was wrong? What if we end up hating each other or something? I don't think that's going to happen, but it popped into my head now.

Will is about to discover commitment isn't the only thing he has to fear. Hi there, listeners. Steve Patterson here. If you're a frequent traveler like I am, you know that traveling's great. But as a wise young girl with fancy red shoes once said, there's no place like home. That's why when I travel, by myself or with my family, I often book Airbnbs for that homey touch. Like the one I stayed at in Stratford, Ontario recently, where I performed a show and took in some Shakespeare. Though to be clear, I didn't perform Shakespeare. There's no perchance of that happening. I was not meant to be, or not to be. Anyway, my point is, I like the feeling of home when I'm on the road, and I feel like I'm not alone in this, especially when I'm traveling with

my family. Which got me thinking, when we're on the road, our house could be a home away from home for fellow travelers too, if we host it on Airbnb. It just makes sense. Actually, it makes dollars, and those dollars could help pay for our next family trip. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. Something to prepend on and on. My name is Graham Isidore. I have a progressive eye disease called keratoconus, and being I'm losing my vision has been hard, but explaining it to other people has been harder. Lately, I've been trying to talk about it.

Short Sighted is an attempt to explain what vision loss feels like by exploring how it sounds. By sharing my story, we get into all the things you don't see about hidden disabilities. Short Sighted, from CBC's Personally, available now. I'm Rob. I'm Andrew. And this is Personal Best.

Our guest this episode, Will, can't return to his favorite shawarma place because of a fear of commitment. We've gotten tips from an ultramarathon runner, crowdsourced advice from therapists, and conscripted a new best friend. Who he already has cold feet about so it's time for one final challenge something that will put his new skills to the test rob walks will into the middle of a forest you're all set uh yeah as much as i can be i guess well i brought some pants because i heard that there might be some ivy uh that i'm definitely

allergic to are you really yeah i've had to go to the hospital several times because of it. We have something epic planned for Will, but we haven't told him exactly what it is yet. But it involves a few props. It's a container of honey. Can I apply this to the top of your feet? Yeah, alright. Can I put these bits of string on top of your feet? Yeah, alright. Can I put these bits of string on top of your feet?

I'm not going to say no. I'm very confused as to what's happening here, so I'd like to see where this goes. I present him with a bright red tunic, a cloak, and stick-on pointy ears. Oh, yeah. We're turning Will into a hobbit. Hairy feet and all.

Why are we doing this? It's probably best explained by this traveling wizard. Well, hello, Wilbo Baggins. This is just you wearing a fake beard. No, your quest is simple. Leave the Shire and return the one shawarma to Mount Doom. Only there can it be destroyed in the flames of Mordor. Okay, so the shawarma

is like the ring. It represents Will's fear of letting people down, his fear of commitment. So in this quest, he has to be able to let it all go. Exactly. With only his wits and a thin layer of polyester to protect him, Will is off to throw his cursed pita wrap back from

whence it came. Only you are strong enough to get rid of this shawarma. And what happens if I don't throw it in? You'll be doomed to wander the earth as a wraith. That's awful. I'm not gonna let you down. All right, I'm going to blindfold you now and abandon you in the woods. Oh god. Alone in the woods, shoeless with a deadly allergy to poison ivy, Wilbo Baggins begins his journey. All right. So...

Where the hell am I supposed to go? Oh, my ear fell off. Oh, there it is. If I can't hear anything, that will be trouble. This is nice, though. Who am I talking to? Okay. Will must navigate an unmarked trail to Mordor.

Except we forgot to tell him about one thing. Definitely somebody following me. Whoa! Ah! This forest is plagued by Nazguls, kings who were corrupted by evil now searching for the one shawarma, and they're neither living nor dead. So they're ghosts.

They're not ghosts. Anyways, Will is running away from a guy in a costume right now. Go, go, go, go, go, go. Sweet abridge. Luckily, along the way to Mount Doom, there are hobbit holes. These are safe zones where Nazguls can't attack. And at this first one, Will discovers a map with sections missing and a small treasure chest. Oh yeah, here. Here it is.

And inside, there's a note. Ooh, nice writing. Stained. When you feel tired, sort of stretched, like butter that has been scraped over too much bread, you can keep going by repeating the mantra one step at a time. Now look up! Something to make your next step a bit easier. Is that a shoe? There's a pair of shoes up here. Is that a shoe? There's a pair of shoes up here. Alright, how am I going to get that? Oh, a stick! Alright, I can do this. There we go! Woohoo! Oh, they actually fit too. This is insane. Okay.

So, the map says the log is next. Let's go. Oh no! It's a Nazgul! A swarm of Nazgul! Okay. One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other.

Let's keep going. Okay. One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other. Just keep going. Okay. I think this is a safe zone! Safe zone! Okay. Alright. Behind the old log marked on his map is another treasure chest. Another letter. Let's see what it says. A fear of permanence can arrest even the bravest soul. Oh, this is true. Relationships change. Friends fight and make up. Plans are made and broken. If nothing is permanent, then what is there to fear? Who would have thought that third-hand advice from a therapist,

found in a treasure box in the woods, would have such an impact? Yeah. I think it means to, like, really go with it, and to, like, understand that things aren't permanent and things do change, so there's really no reason to fear putting your all into something or being a part of something. Yeah, that's cool. Okay, to find your next destination, you must first call this number and cancel your karaoke plans with Cole. What the hell? I'm looking forward to that.

He's let Cole into his life, and he's going to disappoint him by cancelling plans. If his deepest fears are right, this could be the event that causes Cole to hate Will forever. Hey, Cole. Hey, how's it going? Good, it's Will. Hey, Will, how you doing? I'm doing good, man. Well, hey, I got to, um...

You know that we're supposed to do karaoke next week? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I gotta back out on that one. Oh, do you really? Yeah. Oh, no. I'm sorry, dude. We can, um...

Well, we can, like, we can do it again another time, like, obviously. Yeah, dude, no worries. Hell yeah, brother. All right, talk to you later, buddy. See you soon, Jessica. Bye. Like he handled that well. I thought he was gonna yell at me for some reason.

But, you know, it's not the end of the world, right? Well, actually, it is the end of the world if he doesn't throw this magical shawarma into a lava hole soon. So, less self-reflection, more running with his little hobbit legs. My foot in front of the other. Okay. Okay, new safe zone weary traveler the path is winding in your commitment waivers here is second breakfast drink forth from this goblet and allow the best in sports science and hydration innovation to invigorate your body with invaluable electrolytes it's a

plastic chalice in a bottle of Gatorade. That's good. But the map seems to end here. Suddenly, a small, hunched-over figure steps out from the shadows. Hey, Will. I need you to not do this. If you go down that path, there is only sadness ahead. Will is face

to face with a twisted version of himself. Gollum. That's Gollum. A hobbit-like creature, free of all commitments. The commitment of the shawarma. Doesn't it feel heavy in your hands? It does now, yeah. And I'm like really worried about dropping it.

Give me the shawarma. I will get rid of it for you. I can help you so that you don't have to worry about carrying this ungodly load. I want to eat the shawarma to be honest with you. This is like, this looks really top notch. Exactly! What is this podcast all about anyway? I don't know, that's why I keep going because I want to figure it out, right?

Why has this podcast not been on for four years? I don't know. Maybe, maybe they ran out of ideas for a bit. Why do you want to destroy the Suoma? Because Gandalf told me to. What about you? What do you want to do? There's no satisfaction in finishing anything. Let it hang.

Let it be. Let it just hover around your head. That is the way to live. I don't think so. I want to finish this. I started doing it. I agreed to do the task. I think I'm going to do it. So you are choosing to commit to complete the task?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to commit to completing this task. With Will's resolve affirmed, his cursed counterpart reaches into his pocket and gives Wilbo the final piece of the map. Let's see what this says here. Revealing a secret shortcut to Mount Doom. But Gollum is still staring at the one shawarma. Could I just have a closer look?

You could take a look with your eyes. Yeah. I just want to smell it. I'll waft it towards you. My precious. Will makes a break for it, shawarma in hand. Is that a... Is that a...

Oh, it's a Nazgul. Okay. He looks to the sky and sees his final destination. Is that Mount Doom? Mount Doom, described by Tolkien as towering 4,500 feet into the sky, spurting sulfur and deadly gases. It's an awesome sight

and a perfect distraction to launch an ambush. Two Nazguls? Oh my god! It's actually three of them. What the f***? The Nazgals stand between Will and the only flame that can destroy the one shawarma. How the hell do I get them away from there? It's creepy as hell. Okay.

But what's this? Tucked under a rock at Will's feet is the final clue. Nazgals feed on your fear of what could go wrong if you commit. Honesty is the only way to defeat the specters of futures unknown. Complete the following truths and shout them out loud to face down each ghoul. Okay. Young Wilbo stands tall and searches deep within himself. If I break plans with a new friend, the worst that will happen is nothing.

Nothing bad will happen. The first Nazgul falls to the ground. Oh, yeah! Alright, who's next? If I take a new job and I don't like it, the worst that will happen is I'll just quit and find another job. The second

Nazgul collapses. Yeah! Alright, the final one. If I go into my favorite shawarma place and I don't feel like being funny, it's not a big deal. Yeah! I think I got them! Okay, I gotta go. I gotta make my break for it now. Will approaches the spurting, fiery hellmouth.

It is definitely not made of paper mache. All right, this awesome looking shawarma. Guess I'll just drop it in. As he hurls the sandwich into oblivion, Will crafts a farewell so eloquent, one could easily believe J.R.R. Tolkien penned it himself. Uh, f*** you, man! You piece of shit, you're ruining my life!

He drops the pita in the pit. The fire of Mount Doom flares and rages, and then... sizzles out. His shawarma is gone, and with it, his fear of commitment. Yeah! I did it! I vanquished my foes, I destroyed the shawarma. I almost got robbed along the way by Gollum.

He almost stole my thing, but I did it. I got through. I affirmed some stuff. You did it, Will! I did it! Yeah! Now we send Will off with an assignment. For the next week, he has to get shawarma every night.

Seven days of shawarma. He's going to become a regular. A week has passed, and Will is back in the studio. Hey, Will. How's it going? He looks fresh and healthy, not like a man who's been eating meat off a spinning stick for seven days straight. But it's time for the moment of truth. Did you do it?

Yeah, I definitely did. The only reason I wouldn't go back is because the meat is sometimes just way too dry. Dry meat. Seven days of shawarma. We're seeing a new committed will. Yesterday, actually, I went in and I ended up talking with him quite a bit about his old job and some troubles he had. I don't know.

He opened up to me at this point, so I cracked whatever shell he might have had. Next thing I know, it was 15 minutes later and I still hadn't left. I was like, hey, man, what's your name? We've talked about a lot of stuff. He's like, oh, it's Osama. I'm like, okay, I'm Will. And then we shook hands over the register. You shook hands with the Shorma guy? Yeah. He's like, oh, it's Osama. I'm like, okay, I'm Will. And then we shook hands over the register. You shook hands

with the Shorma guy? Yeah. He even took his plastic glove off. Oh my God. Yeah. This is not Will the Grey, afraid of connection.

This is Will the White, master of commitment. And what quest would be complete without treasure? We got something for Will. Hey! Oh, that's really cool.

It's a plate on a stand, but it's Frodo in front of Mount Doom. That's actually really cool. This is a commemorative plate depicting you throwing a shawarma into Mount Doom. That's you, Will. That's me. Well, congratulations, Will. Guys, that's really cool. That's very thoughtful.

Thank you. I think I'm going to actually just keep this for shawarma specifically. People will be like, what is this? I'm like, well, grab a. I think I'm going to actually just keep this for Shwarma specifically. People will be like, what is this? Well, grab a chair and lend an ear. Let me tell you about two weird guys I met at CBC. I'm Rob Norman, and you just heard a show called Personal Best from CBC Podcasts. This show is made by me and Andrew Norton. Our associate producer is Emily Farrier.

Mixing and sound design by Andrew Norton with assistance from Julie Whitman and Graham MacDonald. Emily Connell is our digital producer. Original music by the incredible Breakmaster Cylinder. Transcription by John MacDonald, Jenny Cunningham, Andrea Varsani, and Trevor Campbell. We had editing help from our good pal, Mira Burtwin-Tonick.

Special thanks this episode to Dr. Jan Yeager at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, Chris Berube, Lauren Ober, Jackie Fleming, Ian Bushell, as well as our Nazguls, Ryan Gayo, Corbin Smith, and Florian Francois. You guys were terrifying. Gavin Williams played our golem. and of course, Cole Chauvin. Executive producers are Cecil Fernandez and Chris Oak. Tanya Springer is the senior manager, and Arif Noorani is the director of CBC Podcasts. I hope you enjoyed the episode, and if you did like it, I have good news. Episode two is waiting

for you right now in our feed. Just search Personal Best wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, bye. For more CBC podcasts, go to cbc.ca slash podcasts.