The Debrief - Don't Mind Me, I'm Standing On Business | The Debrief Podcast

Episode Date: August 18, 2025

Welcome back to The Debrief! This week we are talking all about the term, standing on business xAs always email us: [e-mail] or DM us on instagram @the.debriefpodcast for any debriefs or dilemmas!Have an amazing week, Lots of love, K+K xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I've got a rebel soul I've got a rebel soul Welcome to the day of Bray With your co-host, Cotech me, I'm and your co-host, Katie Langee Welcome, Katie. It's really good to have you on the sofa here. I never call you Kitty anymore. It's rather anyone calls me Kitty.

It's quite formal now. Yeah, like, I think the only, I obviously always sign my name off of Kitty on emails and all that kind of style. My parents don't really call me Kitty. All my close friends call me Kit. Yeah. And even all of Archie's family call me Kit.

But the other day, like, one of Archie's, I think it was his mum's like, oh, and Kitty. And I was like, mind trouble. Honestly. But it's weird because I really love my name. Yeah. And I think it suits me.

It really does. Yeah, I think it does. So when someone says Kitty, I like it. I'm like, oh, that's nice. Yeah. But I think. if you're really close to me, I don't think many people do. Well, I find it weird now, like, if people, like, if any of you would call me Katie.

Yeah. Because... I was that she's referring to Archie's parents. And I was like, oh, our housemate who, our nickname we call for him. And then I was like, and then Peach. And I was like, oh, honestly, that'll be Casey. Like, I really see in my future, Kit has a family friend. who has a really absurd nickname that I thought was their actual name and it's not and I thought

I could see this in my future and I think that's going to be it. They'll be like, Peach is coming over and everyone's going about who's the fuck is Peach? Like, no, it's Katie. She'll be like, no, her actual name's getting. And at the time, you'll be married and so your last name won't even be leach anymore. It'll be like Katie Robertson. It'll be like, so oh, what's her name? Like, lemon or it's like that no it's case it's so weird it's worse when i refer to myself as peach which i'd done a few times with close friends who don't call me peach but i'm like oh it's no good for peach and they're like who is that and i was like that's really embarrassing for me it's like

for me it's like when archie and i have serious conversations we're like yeah and peach just set like it's dead and i know Archie's fully like embedded in it now like the other day Archie always calls you at. He's like, Peach. Yeah, the other day, he went. He was like, peach you and I thought, this is just my life now. It's so sweet, you know. Why am I like, peach suits you more than Katie? It really does.

Like, why should you have a spot, like, Pete? Peach. Like, get rid of the Leach, just Pete. Katie Pete. No, not even Katie, just Pete. Peach Leat. Like, I love it. I love it. I like, true crack on.

Yes, that's got on. That's your mantra for this week. My manager for this week. My manager this week is, I'm enough just as I am. Oh, yes, you bloody are. That's so nice. Why did you get that? Oh, my God.

I actually said to our editor, I said, I'm really sorry. I couldn't get the podcast to you last week because I've kind of been going through it, which I'm sure you'll hear about. And he was like, I'll keep an ear out. He's a good man. He's a poor thing now. I just realized I'm so close to this life. I'm like, oh, she's gone again.

Down, girl. He always says to get him. Turn like, turn. Can you turn and get his mind down? Your volume is so much lower down than mine as well. Really? Your resonance is mighty. Yeah, people always say you're just so loud and I'm like...

You've got a very natural resonance. I'm just enjoying long. Similar, you remind me a lot of one of my close friends from uni. Yeah. Who's American. Yeah. So loud. You can hear him so... Yes.

Stop me. genuinely you're genuinely carried the same way in a room i can i can hear you both no that's really shocked me because i genuinely he's loud because when i see him god bless him i'm always like god he's loud you're about the same you're about the same god she's loud you're about the same genuinely hilarious okay so my match this week you know how i like to up two together so you'll think it's the end and then there's a little bit more. I'm giving it to me. So everything is falling into place

and my time is coming. Oh, I love that. Dun dun dun dun. And it is. With a chance of meatballs, everything's falling into place. Yeah. It's all coming. Me, line on me, Lilo, did I tell you that I fell asleep on the Lilo

in Portugal? May and the sun for an hour. Fell asleep. Double chin. Mouth open. I won't. I won't be doing that on our trip. No. We're going on a flat. trip we're going on a flat trip we and also i think 2026 is our year to do lots a girl's trip i really want to go we'll do another flat trip but let's do a girl's trip we've never

done a trip just the girls just the girls and we've also never done a trip just the flat i know we've been doing it in other people but we've never been just the four of us and we're a core four just just the fam just the flat fam maybe we should we should get a our old flat was 77 bay yeah We all say we should get a little 77 tattoo I was actually thinking about that today Where would you get it? I would get it on my ankle Yeah I think I'd get a small

I would get 77 I was thinking if I would get a tattoo I genuinely get a peach I think I'd get a peach on me somewhere I got a peach with like a bikini bottom on A really cute peach And then 77 on me You should get a peach

That is the best idea you've ever had On that holiday I think we should all get tattoos A little 77 It's iconic and it's easily here I genuinely think we would like, like, yeah. Love it. And we would show our kids. And when we all get together on family holidays, we'll whip our ankles out.

Yeah, and we'll all take it. 77, ride or die. We got it in Olau. I can't pronounce that place. Okay, my song this week is, nobody's perfect. Living and learning. Again and again,

so I get in right. Nobody's perfect. Nobody. That is perfect. No, no. Have you... Lovely. It's so good.

Have you had the devastating news? Is it not happening? Archie broke it to me all the important. Miley? Apparently. Miley. Fane page. And they've made the whole thing up.

I can't even blame Miley. Oh my God, you know what I said to Archie the other day? I was like, out of all the pop stars, who are my? I was like not like the voice, the person. Yeah. I was thinking, you know, I was thinking. maybe before she, you know, she had her down days, maybe Britney, not, she went, no.

No. No. Okay. Maybe that's what I wanted to bed. Yeah, yeah. I was like, Britney? Yeah, so no. I was like, okay. Well, first of all, she said, Jewelieper.

I thought absolutely not. No. No. I love Jewelieper, but I'm not joel leaper. She's quite chill. Very, she's not got my residence. Residents. Residents.

Yeah. Oh, excuse. Hannah Montana, probably. I thought, I am. Hannah Montana. You are Hannah Montana. Quince and pink and a bit of like classic. Yeah, that's me.

Yeah. Who would you be? Trying to think now. It's James. I'd want to be Adele. You would be a Dal. I'd want to be Adel. I actually was listening to her 19 album the other day and I was like, when am I going to see that fucking bitch live? I love her. I've never been able to see her life.

I think I'd cry though. It would probably be one of like the best days of my life seeing her down life. She's one person if I saw I genuinely be so star-struck. Yeah, me too. Like, so my sister-up, she takes to me. She's got star-struck today. Stop it. Because she's working at a film studio on some props.

Oh, my God, which film studio? Pinewood. Stop it. The best one. She's having, like, the best time. She's done, like, lots of ad hoc work for them. No, I have no clue. Damn it.

So she's, like, helping them out. Where's Harry Potter vines? Is it Pinewood or is it Warner Brothers? Probably Warner Brothers. But she said she was leaving. and she saw Tom and Zendaya. And I was like, fuck. Oh, Lucy, that's so cool.

She was like, I wonder what they were doing. They were like walking around, like, what on earth? But she was actually like, I met Spider-Man. Oh, I love her. She loves the Spider-Man. What's Pinewood? I know Warner Brothers is like down south. Oh, my geography's terrible.

I want to say it's near Redding. Because I used to drive past it a lot when I was younger. So I want to say it's near, like, Redding that way. And is it one of other studios near where the Harry Potter film studios are? Yes, I think. And that's near Ninja Warrior, Watford. Fuck. I'm pretty sure.

Oh, that's so cool for Lucy, though. I know. She was like, oh, my God. She's like, I met. I met. She's like, I saw Spider-Man from afar. I love her. And I was like, hilarious.

So iconic. Right, shall we? Yes. Oh, record. Reckers. Reck, recommendation. Do you? I do.

Oh, tell me. Guys, it's an oldie but a good day. I went... Guys, guys, on that, my vibrator died. And it's not like, oh, the battery has ran out. It died. That was like, bitch, I've had it. It died a death.

And I was like, maybe this is symbolic. Had you even got to the climate? No. That's shit. No. And that was worse. I was like, okay, I'll just replace the batteries, replace them and it still didn't work. And I was like, oh, it's dead. I'm just going to have to go to sleep.

It's like, no longer anymore, girl. You've had enough. You're not having the midday. No, literally. And I'll get your fingers. So I was like, oh my God, to the point where, guys, I went to boots the next day. I didn't even have boots on.

The problem is I was drunk and I got home. It died, ordered one on Love Honey, drunk. And then, and then woke up being like, oh my God, my vibrator died last night. So I went to Boots, scouring the aisles, found one, got one, came back, and then got an email being like, your love honey orders shit. And I was like, oh, oh, my God. Well, never happened again. It will, I can't believe.

I've had that for years. I'm so sorry, Pete. It was my tried and true. I was actually thinking when you told me this, if my little pink one, I've had it for years. That was my first ever won. Mine's my first ever, I'd be devastated. And I was so sad. It's still in my draw, because I'm like, I can't say goodbye to you.

Yeah, that's mean. No, it's so mean. But my actual recommendation. What was your actual recommendation? Space NK. I love Space NK. Space NK is, if I had to do a pilgrimage somewhere, it would be Space NK. I really want the drunk elephant tanning drops.

Oh my God, I love mine. I love mine so much. And I went and got, guys, sponsorship, product placement. Please. I got the glittery body oil, because I knew we were going on holiday. So I popped in. There's one right next to my work, and I just popped in on my break. And A, the woman.

No, it's just their own brand. Wow. I went in. The woman was so nice. She gave me way too many free samples. Good woman. She was such a babe. I would just work across the road.

She was like, girl, take what you need. We love it. I took loads of samples of my bag. I gave me the glycery body oil. It's only 16 quid. That is brilliant. I just... Because I'm thinking, 16?

16. 16. And I trialed it on Saturday. We had a friend's picnic. And I mixed it in with a bit of moisturiser and, like, put it over me. And I thought it was very subtle. I thought it was gorgeous. Because there's nothing worse than looking like a disco.

Well, it was a bit offensive in the sense that we were walking. And I said to my flat. that we were going with and I said, oh, I'm trialling my new glitter body oil. Can you see it in the sun? And he was like, no, but also, I think you've burnt, you look quite pink. And I thought, so not constructive,

unwarranted and offensive. Right, get out. I'm like, I'll be leaving you at home. Absolutely, and you'll be having no body glitter. And not today, not tomorrow. You'll never get to borrow it now. Never. Never.

Never, ever. Ever. Are you ready? I'm ready. Let's debrief. Tell me what we're doing this week. So, this week, Love Island has gone. But one of the most common phrases that has come out of Love Island this year.

Apart from No Good. Apart from No Good. Is standing on business. Like, no, no, no. I'm going to stand on business. It's standing on business. Right? So, I don't know.

Standing on business. Tell me. means taking care of one's responsibilities and commitments. Often with a sense of dedication and assertiveness, it implies being proactive, following through on promises, and not just talking about goals, but actively working towards them. The phrase also emphasises setting boundaries

and prioritising self-respect and personal values. Oh, I love that. And this is a really interesting one, because weirdly, when we were set to record this, I was wondering, because my question to you is, are we in our standing on business era? And when we were set to record this,

I would have probably been like, probably you, yes, me, no. But I'm saying this now. I fear I am. We've had like a really, really interesting week where we've had to like address something with someone. And I've been so proud of Katie. Thanks, God. Because Katie's usually like, oh my God, it's fine, no, I know, worry, no worry. I was like, come on, go, gal.

Literally. And what Katie is always, and this is why we're good for each other, Katie's never nasty. You are the kindest person I know. but sometimes to a detriment that they're like, oh my God, it's fine. We'll push over. And I'm like, girl, you remember

why you were fucked off with you. Yeah, yeah. And I actually think what's more powerful is when your approach of I'm doing this very calmly. Yeah. I'm doing it very kindly

that I am getting my point across that not only am I upset, but I'm disappointed in that down. Yeah. That holds more weight than screaming. yeah you're a bitching that holds no weight for me yeah literally and it's one of those things that it doesn't make us good television oh great television okay it's just really uncomfortable

I find confrontation so uncomfortable and I find addressing things so uncomfortable but like I think I'm starting to learn that like no one dies yeah I think I really I really think it's like the be all and end all and it's like I'm starting to learn that that is very much not the case yeah and I think when you've had like childhood experiences of addressing things and then either being left out of group chats yeah or not invited to parties yeah or not invited to the girls trips or now we're all talking about you behind your back and I think it is more of a girl thing yes than a male thing I think but I won't stand on that because I'm sure boys experience as well then I think if you've been through that then you think I need to be able to please I need to be able to just not cause

issues. Yeah, yeah. Because I don't want to be left out. I don't want to be, you know, but it's like when, when you learn that your friends love you even when you do wrong and even when they do wrong. Yeah. And you both address it with each other. I think that's when a friendship is real.

Yeah. Like I'm, I completely about myself. I've never had a friendship like I have with you. I'm the same. For so many reasons. And this is why people say, like, how are you guys so close. I'm like, because we're not just friends. We are sisters.

Yeah. We are family. My family know you like their own. Yeah. But also we live together. And we've always lived together. We've always lived together. You don't know just the happy me.

Yeah. You know, you're not like, oh yeah, I've never seen her down moments. Yes, you have. Yeah, yeah. I think probably the only one of all my friends who's seen every down moment, you know. And I think that's quite interesting that can you maintain a friendship? Because I think people will be like, oh, gosh, She's so miserable.

Oh, she's going to piss me. You know. And it's also one of those things, I think, one thing I love from you is your honesty. It's always one of the things where it's like back in public, talk to in private. And like, I think we're both very good at that. But like, I will be your biggest fucking support. I literally, I'm like, I feel just so lucky. Because it actually is quite rare we've learned to have someone who supports you wholeheartedly

and has your. back. And I also, I completely agree. And I also think standing on business can be scary if you think you've got no one to support you. Yeah. Yeah. And I think there's quite a trend with girls to be like, I'll back you. I'll back you. I'll back you. And it's like, well, you didn't say anything. Yeah. You didn't like, you didn't. You know. Yeah. I felt really, you know. And I think it's rare for someone to be like, I'll back you and then stand there with you and also agree and say it. Well, yeah. It takes a lot. It does. And it can be so scary.

But actually it's one of those things like what's more worth it to you is like helping that person. Yeah. Or just pleasing everyone. Yeah, massively. You know? Should we die a month? Yes, let's tell me. So, hi girls.

Hello. Please help me figure out if I'm being dramatic. Never. So my boyfriend's friends are super important to him. We've been together only three months and last week I met all of his friends for the first time. Oh, scary.

Big Mars day. Very scary. Okay. I would say I'm a very chilled out girlfriend. However, I was very cautious that I wanted to be on my best form as I know the boy's opinion of me would really matter to my boyfriend. However, girls, I found these men, especially his closest friend to be rude, condescending and generally inappropriate.

I understand lad chat to an extent, but them discussing how I would be in best. while I'm sat there was a tad awkward, especially as I was the only girl there. I really hate confrontation and making a scene. However, I really feel like saying something to his best friend the next time we meet up and about how those comments could be lesser when I'm not around. I don't know. I'm really stressed.

My boyfriend and I are so fresh that I'm worried he'll think I'm being dramatic, also coupled up with the fact that his friends might view me differently and feel like they can't open up around me and that will sway his opinion. What do you think I should do? If that's opening up, it's so, it's so fickle. It is fickle. You definitely need to say something.

Yeah. Because otherwise you're going to get five years in and have so much resentment that you hate his friends. I don't want to spend time with that. And he will be like, oh, can you just make a half-effer? You need to nip this in the bud now. You'd be like, why are they saying this? Also, if it's the right relationship,

Archie said things to me very early on that I wasn't comfortable with. It was never anything like, nostalgic or anything like that, but think that I was that if that continues, that won't fly with me. Yeah, yeah. And I'm sure he felt the same about certain things I did at the start. I mean, he did. I remember him correcting me on something I said, saying I don't like that. And no, I don't. Yeah. If your relationship is strong enough, he will respect this and take it on board. Yeah. Dare I say, do you want to be here with a man that talks about women like that? And it's also one of those things like, I don't know if I believe in Lodchat. I think that's just,

I think it is. I honestly. do agree. I think boys can be so vulgar and they're like it's lad chat. That's not an excuse for misogynistic comments. No, not at all. And the fact that it was his best friend saying that stuff, I'm like... That's a big word flag

for me. I'm like, oh, what are you like when I'm not around? And it's like, you're closest to him. That's what I always find bafflings is when people like meet my best friend and they're so wildly different. Or offensive, yeah. From the person that you're friends with and you're like, I don't understand how you're friends because I think you're

lovely. And your friends are a reflection, a direct reflection of the person. Yeah. Because they're not your family. No one chooses their family. No. So your family aren't actually a reflection of you. Your friends are. You choose them. Yeah. Yeah. It's, yeah. It's real. And I don't think you're being out of order at all. I think it's just a case of, I think you're right. You just need to be like, it doesn't even have to be like, we need to talk. No. It's like, yeah, by the way, your friends, your friends said this. That was weird. Did you not find that? of it like do you not find that inappropriate yeah i think you're not causing issues and you're certainly not being dramatic no i think you need to say to him in your quieter moments like

oh it was so nice to meet them yeah i really enjoyed it well say that i don't know how i felt about yeah being talked about how i'd be in bad yeah what did you think of that see what he responds yeah to be honest darling everything he responds will say oh he's like oh fuck can't, are you going to make this a thing? There you go. Oh, darling. Ask and answers, unfortunately. Yeah.

But if he's like, because what you do need to give him as a chance. Yeah. Because he could go, oh, what do you mean? Yeah. Because sometimes, and women are the same, until they've had a different perspective, they don't even know that what they're doing is not right. So I think, you know, even putting the shoe on the other foot,

how would you have felt if all my girlfriend sat around and asked how big your dick was? And we all thought it would. You know, like, spin it on the other way. It doesn't need to be confrontational. And even if he says, oh, yeah, I get you and I back you and Bubba Vernie says, I don't really know how to do it. Like, I don't feel comfortable. I think the next time you are with the best friend be like, oh, yeah, if they're having

la chat, you have loud chat right back. Yeah, yeah. You say to them, yeah, boys, we'll say, don't really want you to, don't really want to hear how you think I'll be in bed next time. Yeah. Like, you're more well within your right to say that. Absolutely. And that's not being dramatic.

And I think you need to test the waters with your boyfriend first. I don't care if it's three months or three years. Yeah. This cannot continue. No. What, are you going to have your children? And they go, oh, how big did a vagina get when it got squeezed down? Yeah.

Absolutely not. No. I don't care about this a lad chat. It's disgusting. Yeah, it's great. And actually, I'm sorry. I don't care. Who says that?

I think it's disrespectful of your partner to sit with a group of friends while they're right next to you talking about this. I'm not saying. Yeah. You don't want to beat with a man like that. No. Unless he understands why it was different. Yeah. Yeah.

X. X. Okay. I've got one. Okay, I'll ping pong you. Thank you. I cannot stand when someone prides themselves in honesty, but doesn't do it themselves. I just really value honesty.

Like I really, no, I completely agree. I just value honesty so much. I just really feel it then. Be honest. be honest because I prefer someone to say to me I touch it all the time

I literally touch it I literally don't say people think that's true yeah then be like I really value honesty and they're not be honest yeah

it's really it's really hard it falls back to the same thing where it's like don't pride yourself on being something and when you can't follow through on it because then it's just disappointing

and it's just disappointing and it makes everything you do that's a betrayal of that even worse. Completely. Because you're like, you're saying X, Y, Z, and like, you're saying you're honest and then you do something extremely dishonest. But I'm more pissed off by the fact you're being, you claim your mother Mary. Completely. And I don't know where I stand with you now.

Yeah. Absolutely agree. It's really, really hard. I completely understand that. Ready? Yeah. So mine is being viewed as too much for standing up for yourself. I think it's really hard to stand up for yourself.

Women are always viewed as that. yeah like assertiveness is been bossy everyone's like she's aggressive i don't think so like i think it's actually like it's just so wild she's so sensitive what because i'm saying that's not appropriate yeah like no no no it's not it's not fair no i completely agree and i feel we've had this conversation earlier this week about standing on business that I don't like to surround my self

of people who lit my ass I want you on a pedestal no I want someone to be around me that really enjoys my company yeah and thinks I'm fun and silly but also I could do something

at me but then later on be like I'll care yeah I don't to be honest I love you but and I'm like oh shit really yeah that's when I know someone actually has my back because I think if someone's always that you handle that oh you're a queen you're a queen you're a queen you're a queen and I'm like

I don't know I'm feeling a bit guilty and no you're a queen yeah oh it almost feels like you're not even helping me be a better person no exactly yeah yeah yeah great okay questions I'm deadly serious and I'm stilling okay my question to you is when do you think occasions

require you to not be vocal or be honest about your opinions or feelings. Not to be honest. I think that boils down to whether you think your opinion will be heard and responded to respectfully, regardless of whether it will be taken well or not, that's fine. But I'm like, if you know it's just going to fall on deaf ears and actually cause more harm than good, I would like sway away from that.

Sway away or remove yourself. Interesting. I think, whilst I think that everyone should speak their mind, I do think it's maybe because I don't confront all that often, I always assess whether it's worth the act, which I shouldn't do

and I'm learning not to. Yeah, completely. But it's a natural thing to do. And I also think for me, it boils down to how important one is this person to me and two is the comment yeah you know for example let's say something like we were all out and we were playing mr and mrs or something yeah you were like oh kitty's favourite colour's purple and i'm like it's tink yeah you know it's not worth beefing yeah it really doesn't matter no it really yeah okay tay you know i'm like it doesn't matter

yeah but let's say that situation wouldn't matter for me but then let's say if I had not if I had a disagreement with someone that I barely knew I'm like well they're not really important to me yeah so I'm not really going to speak my yeah yeah 100 yeah yeah I agree so my silly question is would you rather say every thought and judgment that pops into your head that you'd want to raise something with oh god or have your best friend do it but it's very clear that it's your opinion so would you rather beef and confront the minute you have the thought

to being, I don't fuck with that. Like, that's pissed me off. Or have me go, what you've just said, I was really pissed Kitty off. Listen to yourself. Kitty's really annoyed right now. There are two things.

There's a part of that that I would find amusing. Because I'd be like, well, but there'd be a second lot that I'd be protective of you. Yeah. I wouldn't want people to not like you. Yeah. I'd be like, but you're like, Katie's like, gosh, she's on it.

Yeah. You know, I'd be quite protective of you. Yeah. Do you know what? I'm going to pick me and then I'd kind of give you a heads up and be like, if I snort quack it and could you maybe like, say she's had a few drinks? Yeah. Or like spin me away from the situation.

Probably that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because even in situations, let's say. if we were with my parents and something pissed me up and you were like,

oi, oi, what you just said this, your daughter wasn't right. No, I'm like, I see, leave, leave, a, name, a, leave, a, no, you know what I mean? I'm like, oh, it's all going to. How about you?

What would you pick? I think. You bit me because I'm like, I can you. I mean, I'm like, how dare you speak to? And I'd be like, and I'd be like, exactly. Thank you.

yeah yeah you hear that yeah did you hear that yeah exactly my thoughts yeah you'll never hear it from me right we've got to the end of the app

we love you we hope you have a fantastic week slay the day and have a great Monday love you favorite day of the week bye bye

I've got a rebel soul I've got a rebel soul