The Debrief - I've Officially Got The ICK, Help!! | The Debrief Podcast

Episode Date: February 5, 2024

Welcome back to The Debrief!Happy Monday guys, in this weeks episode we asked you all about friendship icks! We discuss the minor and major icks that can make or break the closest of friendships. As always if you have any debriefs or dilemmas be sure to email: [e-mail] or DM @the.debriefpodcast.co.ukWe hope you have an amazing week! Lots of love,K+K x Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

🎵 I got a rebel soul 🎵 🎵 Yeah, I got a rebel soul 🎵 Welcome to The Debris! Hello, Katie! Hello, Katie! It's Monday bloody morning, how are you feeling? I'm feeling good this Monday morning. Yeah, are you?

I'm feeling ready. Yeah, there's a week ahead, who knows what's going to happen. I know, it's really exciting. It's so you? I'm feeling ready. There's a week ahead. Who knows what's going to happen? I know. It's really exciting. It's so exciting. And poor Peach had such an emotional last week. Oh my God, guys. I was a puddle on the fucking floor.

I was a puddle on the floor. Poor Peach. Honestly. So this morning, I came out my room. I was like, morning. And she was like, morning. I was like, the vibes are received back. I was wiggling away you

are ready for the world i am so ready and girlies i am just to let you know i'm ovulating just in case anyone wanted to know so am i girl yeah when did you start thursday damn it The alphas in the room. Oh! I love it. I'm ovulating, because clearly I can't do anything that Katie does not do. I love it. And I thought the listeners should know. Just, you know, to keep them in the loop.

I can't keep them out. Yeah, you can understand the tears and tantrums last week now. Oh, yeah. You can absolutely understand that. But, we're here Monday morning, both ovulating women and smells on our faces. And not fucking crying about it.

Isn't that delightful? Not crying about it at all. Yeah. Okay, let's go to our mantras. What's your mantra this week? My mantra this week is... Tell my girl. Mine is,

I am allowed support. Oh, love it. Which is great. I am allowed support oh love it which i am allowed support yes okay that's nice i've been i think i've been keeping a lot to myself this week so i don't want to like trouble other people so i feel like there are people there to carry the load yeah if you want to yeah so true but you sometimes feel like you don't want to burden other people. Yeah. So you're like, oh, I don't want to be a Debbie Downer, so I'll just keep it to myself.

And then I'm sure tomorrow I'll feel better. Tomorrow you wake up and you don't. Yeah. So sometimes, as my mother says, a problem shared is a problem held. She's a wise, wise woman. She's a wise, wise woman. What's your mantra?

My mantra is, I inhale confidence and I exhale fear. i needed that yeah so i did hot pod yoga with arch and it and it's all about like you know the inhale of like success yes and letting go of any fears that hold you back and i was like and i just kind of loved that so i was like this week i'm inhaling confidence anything that's coming my way and i'm allowing into my body like course through your bloodstream it's confidence yes but anything i'm letting go i'm like no i've had enough of you now no no you're all right don't get in my vicinity because you're not on the vibe you're not on the

vibe you're not on the vibe no no no um so yeah's my, I'm just a little inhale, a little exhale, and I'm feeling, and I always feel like a debrief, a debrief, a deep breathe. Yes. Oh my God, that is like debrief. Deep breathe. Deep breathe, yeah. Helps me so much.

So I feel like if I'm doing like a whoosh. Yeah, and when you hold your breath as well for like. Oh my God, it makes you feel so much better. Doesn't it? Yeah, I love it. It like stables you. Yes. What's your song?

My song is... It is, if you didn't get it from that yeah i did revelry by kings of leon oh i used to be a little ho bag for kings of leon back in the day okay like love kings of leon wouldn't die to see them live really they they were my secondary school soundtrack like like, our whole, like, year group, all loved Kings of Leon. Wow. It was like, the vibe, they were our, like,

band. Wow. And recently, like, Oh, I can't bro. Yeah. They're all bad.

They were our band. We rock. And I was like, oh, then, what do I see comes on shuffle? Revelry by Kings of Leon. And I was like,

fucking hell, it's year nine summer. Boom. I was likery by Kings of Leon. And I was like, fucking hell, it's year nine summer. Boom. I was like, put the bass on. And I literally, I've been listening to them nonstop. What else do they sing?

Sex on Fire, You Know That I Could Do Somebody. Oh shit, they're actually quite good. They've got banger after fucking banger. Love it. Love it. I've got Houdini by Dua Lipa.

Every time it's coming on now, I'm in the gym, and it's like, how does it, oh, what is it? I come and I go. Houdini. Yeah, yeah.

And I'm just like, squat. I squat. Yeah. I squat. Yeah, and I'm just like squat and squat and squat and I'm just like in the zone in the zone in the zone okay so our

recommendation thank you very much last night Katie and I went to the cinema and we saw all of us strangers. Andrew Scott and Paul Mescal. Now when I tell you,

Katie broke down. Don't get me wrong. Don't get me wrong. I cried. But Katie will cry at Bake Off. I'll cry at anything. But I cried. I did cry.

And I was like, a few tears. I look at Katie. the lights come over the cinema i turn to my left katie's like oh she's swollen from the amount of crying her face is red and she's still got her crying face on you know the kim kardashian face and she's like that katie's like that was so sad and your whole face is wet. I was like, what the fuck? I genuinely, so I. Broken woman. I thought, I was told it's a bit of a sad film.

Yeah. So I was a bit nervous going in. About 20 minutes into the film, I'm like, oh, I'm not crying yet. How sad could this possibly be? Yeah. I then proceeded to cry for about an hour and a half of the two hour film like incredible acting really incredible acting but girlies if you

want a good cry which we both needed bring your bring your tissues it was a great film don't go on a date don't go on a date don't go if you've had a shit day and then you want to feel better or actually you could do cry all out but don't go if you've had a shit day and then you want to feel better. Or actually, you could do cry all out. But don't go if you want like an uplifting film. It was not uplifting in the slightest. So we're going to go into debriefing. Are you ready? Yep.

Let's bloody debrief. Thank you, darling. Okay, so this week we're going to be talking about friendship ics. Friendship ics. And obviously ics, they're like an irrational expression of annoyance towards someone. And in this case, we're talking about friendships, okay? Yes. We've had quite a few people write in about friendship ics this week, say, can we talk about it?

Yeah. You know, someone messaged us saying, oh, do you think this could be good? We really want to talk. I was like, okay, we can make this a thing, girl. Okay, first thing, friendship icks, I think they're fucking terrifying. Terrifying.

I think they're terrifying. If to be on the receiving end of a friendship ick, like I'm all about like, oh, you've given me the ick, but if I gave my friend the ick, I feel... How? I'm like, how? How? How?

I'm unickable. Yeah, you can't. What I don't get, though, is I would prefer for, like, if I was dating someone to get the ick. So I was like, oh, maybe I was just not their type. If my friend got the ick from me, I'm like, it puts me on edge. No, because it can happen at any time i know that's what's scary and that's the scary thing about icks in general you just

don't know when it's gonna strike but boy when it does boy when it does it's boy oh boy it can be like a teeny thing you notice yeah it could be like something they do physically or something they say or or even like their laugh and you're just like, no, I'm done. I'm done. Like I'm actually done. And then you're like. Then what do you do? Then what do you do?

Then what do you act? Truly, then what do you do? Okay, so have you ever had a friendship hit? Yes. Okay, tell me. I think, and it's a weird one. I have had a friend where we got on so well. Okay.

A house on fire. Besties, if you will. Okay got on so well. Okay. House on fire. Besties, if you will. Okay. We, in one environment. Okay, okay. We then go out for dinner for the first time. I know. And they were so rude.

To the waiter. The waiter. And I was like, oh. Rude in what way? Just like, no pleases, no thank yous. Snapping? Did they click? Didn't snap or click. Okay, oh. Rude in what way? Just like, no pleases, no thank yous. Snapping? Did they click?

Didn't snap or click, but it was like, so like, okay, well, I'm going to get this and this. Can we get some tap water? And then they literally left. They were serving another table, and they were like, oh my God, this is so ridiculous. They haven't even brought tap water. They're like, we're still waiting for our tap water and i'm like oh no that it could me out and i was like it's like it's i would full-on trade to you like you know in trade

to how they put a red cross through you i'd just be like you're done you're done i was like you're done from the kitty vicinity it really like... Oh, that is not good. Do you think she noticed? I don't know. Were you just like... Because I've spent time with them since, and then you pick up on the behaviour, and you think, actually, you're quite rude to people.

People in general. Yeah. Which is why. It's almost like when you notice it at the start, you're like, okay, clocked it. But then you're like, I'll give them another chance. Then you give them another chance, and you see it in different, like, scenarios.

Yes. Yes. And that is scary. That's scary. Because you think, did I not notice this before? Yes. Because I'm blind. Blind to it.

Blind to it. You had the ick. Oh my gosh, absolutely. Okay, my first ick that I got, it was actually quite early on in life. So it must have been like 10 or something, okay? And I was friends I was in I was before my time guys before my time I've been here before okay also also so my mom actually says I've been here before not to waste or anything but I think it happened okay so I had this friend at stagecoach okay yeah and like we were thick as

thieves we were thick as thieves okay and anyway one day I got the ick and I was like, it was most irrational ick, but I was like, oh girl, your breath is stinky. That's not irrational. It was so, Katie, it was so bad. And she'd like, come give me a hug. And I'd be like, and she'd give me a hug. And she'd be like, I missed you. I was like, don't.

And honestly, I tell you. No. From then on, I was not friends she'd be like, I missed you. I was like, don't! And honestly, I tell you, from then on, I was not friends with her. Like, and I look back and I'm like, God, that was irrational. But I couldn't even, I was like, what? I don't think that's irrational at all. And I think what it to me about, it to me out so much about the fact

she had bloody halitosis, is like, one, how do you know? Two, how are you getting it? So I how do you know two how are you getting it so I'm like one why are you speaking so up close to my face with your stanky breath with your absolutely stinky winks and it's like in my face and I'm like oh get away get away and then she'd come into the room and I'd immediately be like do not talk to me girl like don't don't get your stanky breath in my face. And then it was like, how are you getting it? And I was like, brush your teeth.

And then I'd notice what she's eating. Like, she used to have always beef crisps. So I was like, maybe it's the beef crisps that are making your breath stinky. No, I'll tell you what it is. What? It's your tongue. Ugh!

You need to brush your tongue. Is that what gives you a smelly breath? Yes. Well, there are many things. So my biggest fear, and we've discussed this before, is having bad breath. Yeah. I get so fucking stressed

because you can't really smell your breath. Not really. So genuinely, I'm like, oh my fucking God. Because I completely get that ick. Yeah. If someone's got bad breath, I'm like, no matter how lovely you are, I'm like, oh my God,

I really don't want to speak to you. It's so off-putting. And even if they're like here, like our distance right now, I'm just like imagining the particles. Like this is how fucking creative it gets. I'm like, the particles are coming into my mouth. People will think I'm a stinky person.

People will associate your halitosis with mine when I've got no bloody halitosis in the air it's just so like it's like um oh god yeah you need to scrape your tongue scrape it you need a tongue scraper scrape your tongue and then mouthwash gargle okay so my second one I got as well I have this friend at school like um I probably I probably was close with her from the age of like maybe 14 to 16. And then after like 16, 17, 18, I couldn't stand her. And the reason why is she needed to be the best. Oh.

She needed to be the best at everything, okay? Now, this girl is pretty intelligent, all right? So she was really good at like things yes she was shit at sport but there was one thing she was really good at so she labeled herself as really good at sport so it's like being shit at everything but she's really good at i don't know badminton so she's like i'm amazing at sport okay do you want me like for this one thing she was quite good at sport yeah but every other sport she was shit she did drama good at drama yeah you know what I mean? For this one thing, she was quite good at sport. But every other sport, she was shit. She did drama.

Good at drama. I don't think she did music. I don't think she was amazing at music, but she did it. She was great at dance. Okay, so she dappled in everything. Great at academia. But she thought she was the best at everything. And she needed to be.

She needed to be. So if you did better, would she be like? She'd be fucking livid. She'd be livid. She'd be livid. And usually academic wise, she was better than me. So it's like,

you go girl. Good on you. But in like drama, if I beat, she'd be livid. Oh, I love it. She'd be absolutely livid and I'd be like,

take it. And the thing is, okay, so it was, it's such a high school like petty thing. Yeah. But we were all talking.

It's like in what you call it, Angus Song's The Perfect Snogging. Like, who's got the best nose? Who's got the best tits? Oh my God, yeah, that's wild. And we spoke, and we were all in, like, a friendship group, and we were saying, well, who's the most sporty? Yeah. All this kind of stuff.

And anyway, we said, who's the most academic? And the big snake I am in the grass, I voted for another one of our friends in the group who was academic but i just wanted to vote for her because i didn't want to vote for the other girl yeah fair and the results came in and we'd all voted for subject b subject a was livid she stormed off she stormed off and she called like a meeting with us like she put on the group chat she was like i actually need to talk to you all and she called like a meeting with us. She put on the group chat. She was like, I actually need to talk to you all. And she was like, you've actually really upset me.

The fact you think she's smarter than me. Like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, it gave me the ick. What was she like with boys then? Oh, she had no boys on the scene. Oh. No, no, no. I think boys couldn't take that shit.

Like, she was the most cocky person I'd ever met. Like, everything about her. And it just gave me the ick. Like, I was like, oh. Like, after that. And then sometimes she was so lovely. Like, I'd have really nice chats with her. And we'd get on really well.

And then I'd be like, oh, no, I can't. I can't. Oh, it's hard as well when you forget about the ick. And then you kind of come back together. You go, no, actually, no, you're all right. And then you go, no, no, no, no no no the the question in life is tell me are they an icky person oh or do they just do things nice person but they just do things that give you the ick because i think there are some people that give me the ick easier because i find their person out like them as a

person very jarring okay so they could do one thing and i'm like oh now you've done it like yeah because i'm like you know what you're just irritating as a person you're irritating as fuck do you know what that is actually so true it's are you icky or do you oh no no are you an icky person? Or do you do icky things? Yes. Because it's like, there are icky people. Like, for example, the person that I met yesterday. Yeah.

I was like, that is an icky person. I was like, if ever I've met one before in my life. You could literally, that person could say hello to me. Yeah. Oh no, get out. I've never met this person before. But Katie told me about them and then I met them and I was like, ah. It's like, oh, I get you now.

But then there are people like, that aren't necessarily an icky person, but they do things that are so icky. So icky. And we could name them. And you know the exact things I'm talking about. And you're like, examples, like little examples. And you're just like, oh my God. Why are you doing that?

Okay, so the next thing I want to say. So I think we have to like normalize the friendship X. Okay. Yes. Because I'm like, friendships are great and friendships are strong and stuff. But X, like annoyances are natural. I feel like irrational sometimes. But ics, like annoyances, are natural. I feel like irrational sometimes. I'm like, oh, can it be?

But I'm going to give you some celeb examples of friendship ics. That we can say we understand why they got the ic and the friendship broke up from. Fuck. Yeah. Or if we're like, oh, that was a bit, like, that was lucky. Okay. So I'm going to give you some celebrities that got the ick from each other and for what reason. Okay.

So guys, even celebrities get the ick. So let's normalize this. Okay. So the first one, potentially the greatest of all time. Oh God. Jordan Woods and Kylie Jenner. Okay. So.

That was juicy. Obviously Kylie Jenner got the ick the ick big time yeah like for for the people out there that are like what are they on about now jordan woods kylie jenna besties okay besties besties besties now jordan woods got with tristan thompson tristan thompson was Khloe Kardashian's partner at the time. And she was also pregnant with Tristan Thompson's baby. Oh, God. And Khloe Kardashian is Kylie Jenner's sister. Yeah. Jordan Woods, Kylie Jenner's bestie,

got with Tristan Thompson while Khloe and Tristan were together. And Khloe was with, I don't know, was child, with child. That is terrible. I'm just like, that is the ultimate ick. I'm like, no, no, no.

Why would you do that? No, no, no. Honestly. Why would you do that? I'm just like, that, and then, because it goes extreme,

it's like, I get the ick and then it's like, oh. But then it's like, can you break up from her? And do you know what? They haven't.'t like on the recent

season of keeping up with the kardashian or the kardashians they have got back together and like they even spoke about it so openly and kylie was like look i really didn't miss her but like i had to stand by my sister and i'm just like that takes a strong person to do that yeah but that is a that was that's that that's an egg that was bad yeah i understand that that was bad okay what have you got for me i have taylor swift and katie perry oh tell me which i remember this so vividly okay they were close they were friends okay until oh no taylor swift was on tour yeah their backing dancer her backing dancers of the tour left because katie perry poached them for her tour oh no way more money and that is why okay um taylor swift wrote bad blood because baby now we got bad blood

and now we used to be mad no way they were like all good friends chummy chummy until literally she lost all her backing

dancers halfway through her tour and they all went over to Katy Perry no that no have they wait have they

broken up like is this a breakup did they ever make up again so this is a breakup until literally maybe after the whole Taylor Swift Kanye thing happened, when he did Famous and stuff.

Yeah. She sent her an olive branch in the post. Really? And extended the olive branch. I'm not being funny, actually. I think I'd need more than a bloody olive branch for that. I'm like, that's pretty fucking sneaky. I would say that's an icky person

rather than just doing icky actions. Yes, yes. Because I'm like, how could you do that to a friend? Like, that's just, that is deranged. That is deranged. Like, especially for like performers like that, they have spent months. Like, and then they're just like to the-

Millions of dollars as well. And they've gone to the dancers like, oh, fuck her, come over to me. I'll pay you way more. Ah! Agent! Ah! Ah!

Dallin! I'd be like, ah, dancers? Oh, I'd be so annoyed. Okay, so I've got another one. Kanye got the ick from Jay-Z when Jay-Z skipped Kanye's wedding to Kim. I'm just like, I feel like that is a bad ick.

Like I would be icked out by that. If you were just like, I'm not coming to your wedding. But like why? But that's the question, why? So I feel that it's more of an icky action than an icky person. Yeah, because that seems... Yeah, I always thought they were close,

Jay-Z and Kanye. I know. Probably not anymore. Well, probably not anymore. No. After the drama. But then I kind of feel, oh, icky person, Kanye West.

Oh, icky person. So he's an icky person. I mean, the way he talks about Kim now, and it's foul. And she just talks about him with the utmost respect for her kids and all that kind of stuff. Yeah. So I'm just like, icky person, icky person. Mine is Larsa Pippen and Kim Kardashian.

Oh. Oh, why did they fall out? So they were. Who got the it? They were super close. Larsa Pippen, they stopped contact, like, a few years ago. Okay. And she said it was after her and Kanye divorce.

She just felt caught in the middle and chose Kanye over her. How could you? I mean, how could you? Like, he's a proper whack-a-doodle. How could you do that to Kim? Like, truly. Nah, that's the ick. Not a girl's girl.

No, that's an icky person. Because I'm just like, no, because I'd be livid. That's an icky person. Imagine fucking you and Arch break up. I'm like, thanks, Kit. And you're like, thanks, Kit. Like, respect your girl, but I'm off. Gotta go check on Arch.

No, you've got to back the girls. Back your girls. And this is probably why you're getting friendship icks. Girls, and we'll talk about it later, but there are some girls that back boys over you, and you're just like, why? Why? Okay, so I've got another one which is brilliant,

and I kind of, well, we'll get into it. So Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton. Lindsay Lohan got the ick from Paris Hilton because allegedly Paris Hilton kept going on about who'd been invited to social events and who hadn't been invited to social events. And ultimately, Lindsay Lohan called Paris the see you next Tuesday.

Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Lindsay. I know, I know. Silly Lindsay. I'm just like, I'm like, I do get that. It would piss me off

it would give me the heck if you sat there like oh isn't it so good I'm and Paris Hilton would be invited to everything she is Paris Hilton she would yeah

but if you were just like oh Kitty I'm going to this event like everyone's going oh you're not oh you're not oh you haven't been invited that would piss you off I'd be like

oh you're giving me the heck like do you know what I mean that would oh yeah it's like when people go, oh, have you not heard? No, I can't. Please.

I might get out of the room, you absolutely stanky bitch. Oh, do you not know? Shut up, you clearly know I don't know. And then the other thing that annoys me is when they then refer to other people

and you go, Katie hasn't heard this. Oh, tell me! Don't make it a thing that I'm the only ladybug out. Oh my God, you seriously don't know? Oh my God, guys, Katie hasn't heard this yet. Tell me then!

Don't make a muggins of me. Just say, that's icky. That's icky for me. When people say that, have you not heard? Okay, so we asked the debriefs for some of their own ics that they've got from their friendship. Some of these were fabulous. Oh, God, I love it.

Okay, so the first one, which I so relate to, is my best friend breathes so heavily. And I actually get this because no shade on my sister, but she is a loud breather. She'll literally be sat next to me on the sofa and she'll be like, puff the magic dragon. And I'm just like, Lily, seriously. I was like, you want a treadmill or something?

I think I'm a loud breather in my sleep. Oh, are you? I sleep like... Like, and sometimes, do you ever, like... Maybe this is, like, really not relatable, but do you ever sometimes, like, rush into bed? Like, you're rushing around, like, getting everything done for the next day,

and then you get into bed, and you're a bit out of breath. So sometimes... No! Sometimes I'll be rushing around, I'll get into sometimes, sometimes I'll be rushing around and I'll get into bed and I'll be like, I've never experienced that.

You'd be fucking salbutamol. Yeah, you're like, with your inhalers. Oh, I love that. So another one.

She always flicks her hair before she speaks and it's pissing me off. I just don't. I just like, it is the definition of like being irrational, isn't it? I love that, I love that. It's so irrational. I love that.

I tell you. Oh no, I'm afraid I can't back you with that one because I feel like I do touch my hair constantly. Especially if it's down, I'm always like. Yeah, Kitty's hair's been looking fucking great. Oh, thanks guys. It's been looking really smooth. Thank you so much. And it's gotten long, it's down i'm always like yeah kitty's has been looking fucking great it's been looking really smooth thank you so much and it's got long it's like really long it's so long do you know why though it's looking smooth is because i never use heat on it and i've like i culled it a few days ago and now it's looking silky smooth i always just leave it as it is so when i do put like heat on it it it looks really nice. I've been using my Dyson recently.

Without giving my egg, it looks so good. And right now, best ever. Best ever, although I love how your Dyson just pulls the hair out. The Dyson, man. It's the volume. It's the sheer fucking feel like a poodle today. Oh, I love it.

Oh, I love it. Okay, have you got any yes so the first one which i feel on a visceral level because i had an extreme friendship over there shit go on copying things i do oh really this okay this is layered okay, for example, you getting the black Motel Rocks jacket, they're me buying it, not Nick. We've got a common ground there. We've got a mutual respect for fashion.

We're just fashionistas. We're just fashionistas. Socialites over here, we can't help ourselves. There are so many things that you get that I'm like, I'd like one of those. Oh, you know it. And I'll get one. And when we're in the public eye, like we are. And you know, when you're under the spotlight,

you've got to upkeep. Actually, sorry, I'm so sorry to interrupt, but yesterday I met one of Katie's friends on her course and I went with her and they went, it's the co-host of the Deep Roof Kids. You were there and I was like, it went with her and they went oh it's the ghost of the deep-roofed kitty vanilla I was like it's happening I was like it's happening I was like Katie I was like it's happening oh so funny anyway go on but what I'm talking about yeah is no originality oh okay so I had um a friend who no matter for love nor money,

anything I did, I would walk two steps, she would walk two steps. She was on me. It was weird in the sense that I got this reusable water bottle that you could customize, and I customized it all and everything. She was like, I want one of those. Got it and customized it the

exact same way and i was like now this may be irrational i just i just hated it i obviously have had singing lessons my whole life this girl has never sung a lick in her life started seeing my singing teacher like no i i actually i hold i hold this badge loud and proud guys i went through such a youtube phase i still loved it yes yes guess who then starts youtube account oh no it was wild i just felt a bit smart because we also didn't live close to each other as well but she would always find a way to like involve like she might she might as well join the fucking girl guides that i did on a thursday night oh my god actually we're gonna pull up a new chair on the debrief. She's here.

She's here, Mary. Yeah, Mary's co-hosting. It was just really wild to me that any decision I made in life, she would also be like, oh, and guess what I'm doing. But then, ah, that was the ick. Oh God.

She'd phrase it as if she'd done it first. Like she'd, like it was her original thought. Oh no, that's annoying. So it was literally like, I literally had singing lessons with fucking Rebecca every week, every single week that she knew about.

And then all of a sudden, oh my God, I've been thinking like, I've got this new singing teacher. Do you know Rebecca? Of course I fucking know Rebecca. Of course I know her. Rebecca and I have known each other for years actually. And then it would always be,

what do you do in your lessons with Rebecca? Because she tells me I'm really good. And I'm like, girl. It's the competitive nature. It was, yeah, it didn't feel like, oh, I love that jacket you have. I really fancy it. I'm going to get that.

Yes, yes. It's the slyness about it. That's what I'm like, what are you doing? It was sly. Okay, so I've got another one that I'm like, oh my God. Referring to themselves in third person. Oh!

Kitty doesn't like that. Oh my God, that. I actually knew a gal who did that as well. And it annoys me. Have you seen that? It's like, oh God, Kitty feels so hungry. Oh no, why are you doing that? My best friend has the most annoying, obnoxious laugh. I know.

Do you know what though? My mother said this to me very early on in life. She said, you have to date someone whose laugh you like. She says, because if you live with that laugh. That's true. She was dating this guy for a long time. And I, fuck you not, he laughed like. Like that. And she was like, Kitty kitty I ran out there on valentine's day and left him to dust I was like I was like to be fair I used

to know a girl who would like laugh like I was like why are you squeaking in my ear I was like why are you squeaking? I think potentially my laugh is quite obnoxious. So I feel like I'm staying silent here. Because I'm like... No, actually, I've been told my laugh's obnoxious as well. I always used to get told at school for laughing too loudly. Always. They'd be like, oh, stop laughing.

I was like, I'm having fun. You have such a cackle. I have my wh, oh, stop laughing. They'd laugh. I was like, I'm having fun. You have such a cackle. I have my wheeze. I have the wheeze. Yours is just like, I can't even do it. I'm like, how does that happen? It's wild.

Oh, this is kind of similar to what you said, but this girl said she always has to match with me, and she has to claim that she's done it first. So that's kind of the same with you. So it's kind of like when you got the Motel Rocks leather jacket and then I got it, but it's like me going, I got it first. I got it first and I wear it way better.

Yeah, it's like, ugh. I love it though when we go on a night out and we look like men in black. I know, I know. And we have the same, in the summer as well, we have the same sun glasses. Same the same same boots and the same jacket and then we usually go to a slick back as well and i was like why are they doing that this one was quite specific okay not letting you sit on their bed until you change out of outside clothes i find this so interesting i've seen

this all over tiktok i don't get it i've seen it all over i personally i am very clean you i love my i'm just rogue and clean over here okay and clean talk about hating people that like have you boast about themselves but um i i But I love to be clean. However, I'm not bothered. If you were wearing what you're wearing now and sat on my bed, I wouldn't twitch. If you came from the gym and you were sweaty and sat on my, I wouldn't appreciate that.

But if you're wearing what you're wearing now, I don't understand how outside clothes can't sit on the bed. No, yeah, that confuses me. Okay, you ready? I'm ready okay you ready i'm ready she's ready now she's done it okay so the debrief center has some friendship dilemmas okay so i'm gonna read you the first one girls help i can't stand my best friend she is pissing me off so basically recently i found that my best friend

let's call her Jenny Jenny from the block I found Jenny insufferable we are both 25 and have known each other for 8 years we see each other

2 times a week usually as we live in the same borough in London oh London girl oh London girl London girl she is so fucking clingy recently that I had blocked her oh as we live in the same borough in London. Oh, London girlie. Oh, London girl. London girl.

She is so fucking clingy recently that I had blocked her. Oh! Now that's extreme. She called me out on it and I made some silly excuse that Instagram was acting up. Oh, girl. Oh, God.

Poor fucking Jenny. Jenny's like, hey. Oh, my God. I god oh i'm like do you she goes i feel so bad as anything she's doing is actually annoying me last week was my birthday and she took me to the spa and all i could do was roll my eyes at any comment she said she even was telling me how nice my pedicure was and I felt like slapping her. Oh God, it's extreme. She goes, oh God, help me. I don't know how to stop this feeling.

Am I a bad friend or should we just give up? I've got the ick. What do I do? These feelings are not going to go away. They're not going to go away because I've had this. Yeah, yeah. And once it gets to that point yeah like when the tolerance i cannot even spend like an hour with you without wanting to slap you slap you yeah you're no you've just got to cut it loose and i think as well if you're if she's giving you

compliments and you're like fuck you it. It's like Katie being like, your hair looks so nice and I'm like, oh, eye rolling like, oh, thanks. Like,

I think if you've got to that stage, I would advise pulling back seeing her. If you're seeing her two times a week, you don't need to do that. But I, realistically you don't. I think you need a good,

if you don't work together and you don't live together. If you don't work together and don't live together. We'd't work together and don't live together we'd be fucked if we got the egg we would be fucked we'd be fucked

I see you all the fucking time I see you every day of my life I love her in the house in the pod planning the pod doing social media

with our guess who I know I feel like you just need to be honest which is hard. Yeah. I think maybe just say that you've been feeling really stressed. Okay.

Work's been really hectic. Yeah. And you just need to take a couple weeks to focus on yourself. Lovely. Lovely. This one isn't necessarily about a friend. Oh, okay. But it is about an ick.

Okay. And it seems quite urgent oh oh oh so okay we'll hit us with it and also this is just a twisty tanny okay it's a twisty tanny god i'm panicking so hi girls please could i remain anonymous? Of course. The guy I'm dating has a belly button fetish. Got this to return. I don't kink shame, but I get a funny feeling whenever someone touches inside my belly button. Is it just me? No, girl.

No, I'm stopping you right now. I'm stopping you. If Katie got her little trotters into my belly button. No. Fuck off. If Archie was, if I was sat in bed with Arch and he trotters into my belly button. No. Fuck off. If Archie was, if I was sat in bed with Arch and he's swirling around my belly button. No. No thanks.

No. I get you. It's not just you girl. It's not just you. He said he wants us to finger and lick each other's belly buttons. I don't mind doing it to him and showing him my innie. He has a thing for innies. Oh, God.

Oh, my God. Girls, we're not safe. It's just the touching. Should I try desensitizing it, if that's even possible? Or is it not to be? I really like him as a person, and we get on well. Don't worry if this is something you would not discuss. We would absolutely discuss this. Do you know what, darling?

You hit us with anything at any time. This is why the debrief is here this is why the debrief is called the debrief because we debrief about anything okay anything okay so my first thing we're not into kink shaming so no if that's his thing that's his thing yeah however sex and everything kinks all of that you have to be consensual yes and if you feel that you are not comfortable fingering and licking his belly button which i don't do it and i'm also not being funny like belly buttons are smelly or like buttons oh the most oh is he is he cleaning his well you would hope so actually probably might be a bit anal about it if he's got a fetish for them.

Yeah, he might actually have the most... So he's got a thing for innies. Innies. Oh my God, this is so scary. I just, I feel like, like you said, do not try and adapt for his liking. No, no, no. If you don't want that done to you, do not.

No. Do not. No. And also, then you're going to feel a bit self-conscious, like, getting your belly button out. You'll be like, oh, God, are you going to obsess over it? Yeah, like. You just, like, start wearing a cover over it, you know?

Like. I think, I think, if you're happy doing it to him. Fine. Fine. If you're happy. Green light, girl. Just rubbing his little belly button and giving a good old lick in there like a cream egg good on you okay yeah but don't feel pressure no

for him to do it to you if you because i'm not being funny if i was lying on my bed and archie's like my belly button i'm like get off you I would not be happy with that, okay? Yeah. Because each of us have our own boundaries and personally, that would be a big boundary for me. If Arch wanted me to do something and I wasn't happy with it, coming from like,

actually, this will be good from a relationship and someone who's like seeing people, but not in a relationship. From in a relationship, yes, you feel more secure saying things. So maybe she wouldn't feel as secure. But would you feel you'd be able to say someone that you were seeing, I don't really want to do that?

Yes. Okay, well. I think I will, yeah. Okay. When I think, just be honest. Be honest. Because I would not want to be doing that either. And also, if he turns around,

if your worry is that he's going to turn around and be like, oh, well, we're just going gonna break up then let him go well we take his let him go belly button and off he trots let him go find find someone else because truly then you'll just be like right well there's a better man yeah my way and darling like don't stress about don't think oh god am i gonna be nasty there's no need to be nasty or you know you can just say it in a way that you know say oh like I really respect you and I'm really enjoying where we're going and you know I'm finding it really

attractive and I feel we've got a great energy but I just want to be honest with you I don't really like it myself like I don't like you doing it to me but I really enjoy doing it to you I like to see it gives you pleasure great great you can put it in that way don't be like i'm not fucking doing that i'm like yeah you know like what um good luck darling let us know how that goes and of course we'll always

keep you anonymous yeah okay so i've got another one my best friend is giving me the ick capital letters her and i have known each other for three years oh okay okay i've recently got our boyfriend about six months ago a group of our friends including my boyfriend all went away in january for a new year's holiday my boyfriend didn't know my best friend very well and neither did she however she kept oh god oh no however she kept on getting really drunk and saying he was like a brother to her oh no oh god that had really yeah she was even lying over him laughing saying it's so funny because we are practically like brother and sister. We could even spoon and there would be nothing.

Oh no. You're joking me. It's been two weeks and I can't get it off my mind. She cringed me out so much that the whole trip that I've avoided her at all cost. I haven't seen her since, but when anyone brings her name up, I'm so icked out. She's cringing me.

What should I do? That is, but I would personally also take that as you fancy my fucking boyfriend. I, that would upset me. I wonder, darling, if there's a bit of jealousy there.

I think so. She's lying over him, giggling. We're practically like brother and sister. We could jealousy there. I think so. She's lying over him, giggling. We're practically like brother and sister. We could even spoon. No. No. No.

Not on the first, no. No. Not ever acceptable, but on their first meeting to behave like that. Oh my God. I want, okay, benefit of the doubt, maybe she's heard lots about him from you, so she's really excited.

She's like, oh, I can't wait to meet him. He's gonna be great. Then she meets him, she feels really excited she's like i can't wait to meet him he's gonna be great then she meets him she feels really comfortable great that's fine where she takes it too wrong is lying over him saying that they could spoon that's silly that's fucking wild really seriously really could you could you spoon i don't even because i'm like i don't know about that that's really snaking that pissed me off big time so the fact you've got the air and the fact you're cringing i to be honest darling i think you should bring it up with her yeah i think you should say listen i feel like listen nimble woman listen you're in a hurry but can we please have everything that is on your trolley yeah i think you i think you should be

honest and be like look i i love how much you guys got on like that made me really really happy to see yeah um but personally like it just seemed you got quite cozy quite quickly like and it just kind of made me feel a bit weird yeah just be it doesn't need to be bitchy just be like i think there are a few things you did that i didn't appreciate yeah and then say for example lying over him then if she's if she's a very tactile person and she's like oh why just be like that was the first time you met him yeah then and then if she's like oh but what else just say well saying that you you could spoon with him considering yeah he's my boyfriend i find that really disrespectful yeah i'd also love to know what your boyfriend thinks what's he saying about

all this yeah i can't imagine it was the best impression no can you that probably doesn't help your ick as well no no like oh my god i'd love you to meet my best friend they behave like that and you're like you'd be so embarrassed imagine you lying over archie's lap laughing being like you're like my brother we could practically spoon this is what i don't there are some girls and this is a generalization yeah but there are some girls i've come across in life yeah who use the whole, we're like brother and sister, to be inappropriate with guys that you're with or any just male friends in general. They're like, oh, it's so platonic.

Is it though? Is it though? Like you clearly do fancy them. Yeah, is it though? Because you're taking it a step too far. Yeah. Yeah. Honestly.

I really think you should talk to her because I think that's out of order. And she could, look, she could honestly have just been overexcited, trying to,

like nervous. She could have just been like wanting him to really like her so that she can stay in the like, you know, in your life

and all that kind of stuff and make things easy. So let's fingers crossed with that. But I think you should talk to her because you don't want that happening again. And of course you're going to all meet up again and have drinks. And you don't want her to be like,

oh, Hannah, can you not drink? Because I don't really want you to touch my boyfriend again. Do you know what I mean? So I think you should chat to her. All right, darling. Hicks. Tell me, how many do you have this week? I've got one. I've got one. You go first, darling. Can you really? Ixas. Tell me, how many do you have this week?

I've got one. I've got one. You go first, Donny. Are you ready? Yeah. Three, two, one. Okay. Mine is people who like follow through. Ooh.

Tell me. I feel like this is more of a male ick than a female friendship ick this week. However, I am just a bit tired of men in general who I feel like I'm batting. I'm literally chucking opportunities. Peach has been brave. I've been so fucking brave, guys. In the dating opportunities. Peach has been brave, okay? I've been so fucking brave, guys. In the dating scene, she has been brave, okay?

I've been so brave. And there's a situation at the moment. There's a situation where there have been multiple opportunities in which this person could have been like, let's go grab a drink, and they haven't. There's been opportunities where this person has been like, I'm gonna go do this,

please come with me, and then I've heard nothing about it. And also, let me make it clear that Katie's made it clear of her intentions. She's not like, I'm gonna go do this, please come with me. And then I've heard nothing about it. And also, let me make it clear that Katie's made it clear of her intentions. She's not like- Oh, I've been clear as fucking- Yeah, she's not like- Clear as the sky.

She's not doing that, let's be brother and sister. No. She's been like- I literally was like, I'd love to go for a drink. I'd love to see you. I think that would be great. I think that would be really lovely. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I'd actually love that. Let me book that. Nothing. Absolute niche would be really lovely. Oh yeah, yeah. Like I'd actually love that. Let me book that. Nothing. Absolute niche. Oh God. And I'm just like, I, all the other signals I'm getting

is that you're very interested. Except when it comes to actually pushing the fucking golden buzzer. Yeah. Push the golden buzzer. Put me through to the final, all right? Put me through.

Put me through to the final like the confetti fall on my face. Honestly, you haven't had the chance to see me in my finest fucking form no no and they keep bumping into each other and this is what i'm like just crack on and it's so and and it's intense yes yes so i'm like come on and the onus the onus is on and there are so there are so many opportunities there are so many opportunities so many literally

so fucking many so what are your intentions okay like seriously come on let's cut the crap let's that would be the

imagine oh my god can you imagine let's cut the bullshit let's just cut the bullshit. Let's not pander anymore, okay? I know you want me. Let's not dance around this anymore.

I know you want me. My God, actually, in reference to this, my poor sister, she was very upfront with a guy and she texts him saying, when are you going to take me out again? Then he responded like a child.

Like a literal infant. Capital letters. Ha, letters ha ha ha you fancy me why and she was like oh why are you doing that honestly okay i'm ready okay so i experienced this last weekend when people get drunk and then just stop like i think i think i get the it more when it's like they're not heartfelt people like they're not very genuine people no no that's maybe unfair not genuine but they're not emotional people yes yeah and they get drunk and all of a sudden everything's deep everything's deep like oh my god well i thought and i experienced this with a friend the other night

we all sat around having drinks and then he's just like making something so he was talking about him i'm just gonna say he was talking about how his knee wiggles you know the jiggling thing like when you did it and he was like honestly philosophically questioning why this happens he's like you know maybe it's just like an insecure thing like maybe i just don't i truly yes he's like yes you know he's like he's like maybe i just truly don't know myself and i was catching eyes with archie and I was trying so hard not to laugh. And I was like, what the fuck? And I got the ick,

like I had to go through to the kitchen. I was like, oh God, I'm really icking out. I came back and he was still going. And everyone, bearing in mind, Archie was on the back of a sofa asleep. And the other two people were drinking and just giving each other the eyes. And I was like, clock on that people are like.

Not listening to you. No, we've had experiences with this person before where they they will talk for oh hours hours hours about why apples are red like and i'm like seriously and like at four in the morning it's deep it's like oh seriously no but seriously and i'm like we should consider that and then they don't stop talking so you can't even accent you can't even do a little french accent you can't even be like no no no no and you can't like and and then if you laugh he's like i'm trying to be serious and you're like oh god you're like oh shit so i was like he's actually trying not to laugh so much i was like yeah okay okay let's go on to questions. This week, I'm serious. Yes.

Okay, so my question is, how would you address a friendship ick with someone that's close to you? And what would you consider a big enough ick to address, and a small enough to let go of? enough i think would be little habits that i think okay that's just like your little quirks you know what i mean hair flicks or hair flicks or like a funny laugh wouldn't bother me that much okay um i think when it comes to maybe how they come across when we're together is where

I would probably address okay like if they were rude and did something in another group where I'm bringing that person in um and they were rude or did something out of turn or did something that made everyone else feel uncomfortable I'd'd be like, ooh, listen. Yeah, okay. I would address. I think it's a horrible thing to have to address, but I think you just need to be like, look, this isn't anything,

like this isn't a criticism. This is just that you've done something that I feel like has upset me and kind of came across wrong, whether your intentions were yeah fair enough um right or wrong it didn't come across the best so I just thought I'd let you know like that's how it translated okay um would probably be how I'd broach it okay good idea yeah about you I think I think I'm similar to you that I would definitely consider the severity of the situation so for example if

we're referencing the stories today yeah like the belly button thing yeah the um the boyfriend thing I would address both of them however the hair flick not really like I wouldn't address that the funny laugh as you said, no. That's just the person. You've also got to consider how easy is this person to change this and why do you want them to change? Yes. And what's that reflection of?

If I'm saying, Gage, you change your laugh, that's going to make you feel highly insecure. Yeah, yeah. And really, who's that benefiting? Yeah. But if you're snapping at waiters and being rude or if you're lying over archie and i'm like yeah please could you stop that that is benefiting both arch and i and people

in the group yes you know um so i think i could i completely agree with you okay right my silly question silly would you rather yeah be icked out by a friend every day little things oh god okay and you see that this is like you and i so i would like ick you out every single day with like a little thing or once a month but you are publicly icked out like and it's a big ick. They're a friend for life. You can't cut ties. So for example, it would mean being like every day. Something like that. Before I ate.

Yeah, okay. Or me like running through the streets screaming once a month. In front of everyone. Being like publicly rude or publicly icky i am actually going to go with the first one and it's not because it's a public thing like i'm more than happy to to you know take on confrontation in a public setting however yeah if it's a public thing

every month that i'm having to address with you that i'm having to sit down with you being like you did this and it was so embarrassing you'd said this and it made me feel shit you did it would also completely you say we can't cut ties it would completely ruin our friendship because you would feel god i can't do anything right every single time we go out every single month you have to sit down but if you're going to me every time you eat i fucking love it yeah and i do it back like do you know what i mean yeah yeah and yeah that may be icky but like i'm so with that yeah i'm so with that but like big thing every month that i have to like go to archie and bitch like oh god i can't stand her yeah that would really take a toll that would take a toll do you know what i

mean yeah and what do you think i think i go for the first one yeah yeah yeah i can get over that i can do it okay debriefers we've come to an end we've come to an end when does become oh no oh my god do you also know that the reason that there's moon in the sky what did we learn casey oh my god come on the sun shines on it yeah it's the shadow it's the shadow it's the shadow so what you're seeing of the moon the moon doesn't illuminate. The moon is not like bright. It's the shadow from the sun. Wild. Take that away with you for the week, okay?

Take that away. Guys, have a lovely week. Remember to follow us on TikTok, Instagram, email us your dilemmas. Yes. And we hope you have a fabulous week. Love you guys.

Bye.