The Debrief - Monday Blues | The Debrief Podcast

Episode Date: January 20, 2025

Welcome back to The Debrief!We are back this week talking all things Blue Monday, how to beat them and what to do on the saddest day of the year.As always email us [e-mail] with any debriefs or dilemmas or DM us @the.debriefpodcast Have an amazing week! Lots of love, K+K xx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the D-Breef with your co-host Kitty McNeil and Casey Lee. You know it. How we doing guys? Do you know what I'm personally doing really good is Archie's birthday this week. So I am a cat on a hot tin roof. Oh, you are not stopping churning. I am not stopping. I tell you what, for your own birthday, the level of stress is there. For someone else's birthday that you're planning, it's way beyond.

This is why I can't, we've spoken about this. I don't like doing stuff for my birthday, as in like parties or big things, because I don't like the stress of it., I don't like doing stuff for my birthday, like as in like parties or big things because I don't like the stress of it and I don't like the social expectation that if everyone has a shit night they'll just be like, oh yeah, give me Katie's birthday. Katie organized that. Oh, that was Katie's event. And it's also a direct reflection on you. You're thinking like, so do you think she thought it was fun because it was boring?

And then you're like, I'm so insulted right now. I genuinely like wouldn't be able to recover from that. I tell you what, it's all the bits in between. I remember planning holidays for arch night and it gets so stressful. Like let me tell you, let me tell you, okay. Now it would have come out by the time this happened, so it's fine. Okay. Boom. Yeah. Staying overnight. Yeah. At this bloody... What's it called actually? It's really nice. Oh, what's it called? It's in Hemelhempstead of all places. It is, it is. Let me search it up actually because it

is lovely. RIP if anyone knows of the aqua park in Hemel Hempstead that ended up shutting down for hygiene reasons. It's a very sign as a firm visitor. All the time. You caught a few things there didn't you bitch? Always. You vrookers. Yep. What is it called? Cause it's so bloody nice. Cure man. Shendish manor. Okay. Tuesday. Tuesday, bloody Tuesday. Okay. Tomorrow. Yep. I'm all guys I'm on the radio. Actually before we get into it, I'm on the radio. I see before we get to I won the radio. I thought it was next week. No, it's tomorrow. So is there a little how do I tune in? Okay. That's yet to be confirmed. Okay. I just know where I need to be. But let me check in with my resources.

Well, if not, please get a recording. Of course, get a tape of it or something you can bring back to me. I'll bring back back then you can watch it. Exactly. So I'm on the radio, Radio Riverside if any of you would like to listen in and I'm promoting Little Women which I'm thrilled about. Then Archie will meet me afterwards, boom, have to go from Bathsy to bloody Euston, I've bought the tickets from Euston to Apsley, bought the ticket there, then from there we have to get to bloody Hemel Hempstead to go to what's it called that I just told you Shendish Manor

Go Shendish Manor, stay the night then got breakfast there full English boom go from there from Helmel Hempstead to Snow Centre Snow Centre is where we'll be skiing from the door, skiing on game and after that we'll be bloody getting on the train back From absolutely back to Pune about an hour and a half, come back here, got about two hours to get ready before dinner. Yeah. Then after getting an Uber and off to Rick Steen and Barnes. Rick Steen and Barnes. Katie, it's overwhelmingly stressful. It's a big day.

Yeah. Because a really big day. Archie was like, I was saying that I'm thinking about taking a class tomorrow and Archie was like, Oh, what time? And then I was like, Oh, like two, three o'clock. And he's like, Oh, I don't know if that works with my birthday schedule. And I said, Oh, well, well, well, don't come then. You know what I love is that when I met Archie four years ago, he was like, birthday what?

Now he says like birthday week or he's like, I could do a birthday month. And I'm like, you've rubbed off on me so much. He said to me earlier today, I said, he goes, oh, by the way, you need to book in your birthday. Like what you want to do. And I said, oh, yeah, it's because not a lie. My weekends are filling up. And I was like, oh, sorry, big chief. Because I was fucking talking to bloody Donald Trump over there. Busy man. talking to bloody Donald Trump over here. Busy man. You can actually hurry up with that Katie. Because I mean, my schedule is chilling up. I was like, I can't wait to actually when you have a boyfriend, you're shitting yourself being like, but that's the thing. If you guys get together, let's say you meet him in March, you get official in April and his birthday is in bloody May.

Oh, it would have to be. Not a shit on you. That's really shit. It'd have to be something low-key. So you're thinking, if I go big, is that a bit much? But also it sets precedent for when it's my birthday go big. No, but like- Because then if you go small thinking it's early days and then he goes small for your birthday, you think you're footless.

I see. I think it actually, honestly, would veer me the other way. Oh, go on. If like I got with someone, let's say we became official in January, my birthday was in Feb. Yeah. And then he is like, organizes this huge fucking hullabaloo. She didn't know if I'd like it. So you're telling me if he takes you to bloody Tuscany, if he's like, if I'm

relatively like new in a relationship, I'd be a bit nervous. What? You can't even say no, but I'd be a bit nervous. What? You can even say no, but I'd be a bit nervous. But like if he just got me flowers and like a card and we went out for dinner, like I'd be pleased. Okay, well, that's nice. Yeah, that's nice. Yeah.

But like, if he came out with like a barbershop called TEP for me, I'd be a bit like, what are you doing, son? I'd love that. He'd immediately be in my good book. I'd be like, that's the level of Shelling Light. Right, should we get on with that? Let's crack on, what's your intro? So my mantra for this week is, it's kind of tortoise and the hare vibes, alright? It's

I don't race to the finish line. I enjoy the journey. Oh, I really like that. I think because everything's amping up with little women, like the show's coming, tracks coming with child costumes on and all that kind of stuff. Okay, the performances will be brief. But also I'm so enjoying the rehearsals. I'm really enjoying the process. And I don't want to rush to that straight away. Yeah, I 100% get you. Tell me what's yours.

My answer is I am sharpening the axe now. Axe stab, is it? Traitors. sharpening the axe. Now, so, I stab is it right? Oh my god. Oh, we can't. Sorry. But a girl at work was like, have you ever heard of the phrase like you're sharpening the axe? And I was like, no, because she was like, as you go into 2025, I saw this TikTok of someone saying I'm sharpening the axe. As in like, as in you say, bettering your sharpening my axe. I'm sharpening my own axe. I'm getting ready. So when I have to do things, I'm like on fine form axe cut straight through the wood because I'm ready. I'm the best version of myself. I'm the sharpest axe.

Oh shit. And I was like, can I love that? Can't I love that I'm sharpening my axe. I was like, oh, I'm going to do the 145 today. And she's like sharpening the axe. I was like, you got it. I am. I am sharpening the axe. Oh wow, I see. I've never heard of that phrase before, but I of love it as well. I know it's kind of fun, isn't it? Okay, I'm gonna sing you my song this week, of course. Yes. Are you ready? Tell me. And I'm so messy, and I'm so fucking clean. You tell me, get a job and then ask where the fuck I've been. Yeah.

And I'm too perfect to open my big mouth. Okay, yeah, Yeah. Messy. Messy by Lola Young. I shit you not the whole of December, the whole of January, I've been listening to this song. It's a banger. It is such a banger. It's a banger. I've become a little bit obsessed with her as well. Yeah. Just a little bit. So much obsessed to the point that I'm like, come watch me and little women. Like Lola. I was like Loli Young, this is a shout out to you. Your music's amazing. And I love it.

I really like her music. Come watch me in Little Women, because I really appreciate that. And then you do an encore at the end and be like, because I'm jealous. In my bloody poor sweat. I mean, there you go. I love it. OK, tell me your song. My song, and you're going to laugh.

OK. Is. Oh, no. S song, and you're gonna laugh. Okay. Is. Oh no. Sissy That Worg by RuPaul. No, no, no, no, no, no. I was in Pilates today. Okay. And I was like doing fucking glute bridges. And then I thought, I know this song.

This song's like playing, the music was quite like low in there. Okay. And this, and I'm like, why do I know the song? And then it gets onto the thing. And it's like, now sissy that what? And I was like, they're playing fucking RuPaul right now at Pilates. And I thought, this is sensational. And I listened to it the whole way home. Do you know what? I do, I do slag you off for it. I do. I love that. I really think I need to get into it because even a friend of mine yesterday was like, did you hear the drag

queen died and mentioned the name? And I was like, I'm afraid I've never watched any drag queen stuff. And they were like, what? They were like, that is so kitty coded. Oh, I was like, I was like, see my best friend says as well. No, I was like, I really need to kind of get into that. No, honestly, like the Vivian dying was so like that's so sad. How did she die? It hasn't been disclosed. So sad to me. Like she was the winner of the first season of Drag Race UK.

Oh my gosh. She was absolutely dancing on ice. Like she was incredible. Like honestly, aren't you told, aren't you told? I thought you were joking. You know, it was like when Liam Payne died. Oh yeah. And he said it and I was like, what? Like really, really like sad.

Was she young? Around like, yeah, like thirties. Oh my gosh. Yeah, like really young. So that was so sad. But you would love Drag Race. I really would love to watch it with you. I think we should start it after Smash.

Let's do Drag Race. I think I watched Drag Race once in here and I was home alone. You know when you start home alone and everyone starts coming back and I was watching Drag Race and Archie and others came home and they were like, what the fuck are you watching? See if I get on board then that'll happen. That'll be a thing. You love it! I'll get on board okay.

Exactly. Do you have a record? Yeah. Okay tell me! My record! My record! My record! My record!

Recommending a child. Tell me Katie. Slightly biased guys. It's Barry's bloody boot camp. Really? Now. Really. I... Simply biased. I... Slightly biased guys. It's Barry's bloody boot camp. Really? Now. Really? I

simply biased. Embarrassed myself and got a injury from running a 5k. Couldn't walk for like two weeks. Still no. Is it better now? So much better. But because of that, I was thinking about you today on my run. I was like, poor Kasey. I haven't actually run outside I'm still a bit scared. Really? Oh scared. I was in physio for weeks, couldn't exercise, got cleared. I basically get three Barry's workouts guys. Employee Park. And it's such an employee. It's the best employee park I think I've ever had in my life. So I was like so excited to do classes then injured myself then couldn't do them. This week. Last week even did four. I love it in there. Do you? Is that your? We need to go. I would love to go. We need to go. You get a guest pass? Yeah. Get in there. I'm like everyone come with me. I would love to experience it. Because you got me

hooked on one rebel. I think it's better than one rebel. And if there was a one rebel closer to us, then I would do it. But it's the fact that it's far that I can't. But I would love to experience a barrier. And it is so like it's so much fun. And I don't know whether it's because I hadn't been exercising and then I was allowed to. But like I didn't realize how down I was feeling because until I exercise and I felt so like I felt back to myself. I was like, oh my god, like I'm loving life I'm back. I'm back

But it's so true like it releases those endorphins and also that adrenaline that you don't get from other things That is so nice. It was so good. I love that Are we ready? I'm ready It's a day, bro. So speaking of feeling a bit down in the dumps, today, the 20th of January is Blue Monday, which is allegedly the saddest day of the year. Do you know what that is mad to me? Because I'm not a massively sad person.

Yeah. Like I feel, I feel that I'm a like, I'm a a massively sad person. Yeah. Like I feel... I feel that I'm a good, lucky woman. And January for me is like the month of like, let's get it. Let's fucking go girls. And also maybe the fact that little women is now, January that's making me feel more, let's get it. So I'm feeling really bloody cunt. But I can understand how it could be depressing for others. Well, so I looked up the definition of it. And it says that the definition of Blue Monday

is the most depressing day of the year as the reality is that many of us can feel down as our New Year's resolutions may have started to fail. We're feeling the financial pinch after Christmas spending. Tell me. Tell me about that! Bloody j- But in December got me then boom! Archie's birthday hit! And I'm like, go for me. I'm only one week.

Please. Please help. And everyone is officially back to work. And we may also feel the monotony of everyday life alongside, we've still got bad weather, we've still got dark nights and we're not looking forward to Christmas. So now we're just waiting for the sun to start fucking setting at 4 p.m. When did the clocks change? I think it's March, end of March.

Oh, you're joking. Yeah. You're joking. I saw an Instagram that said don't worry guys in like three months, the sun will start setting at 6pm. And I was like, that's made me feel infinitely worse. Genuinely, I'm like, this is three months? Oh, that's shit.

Because you kind of answered this question, but actually, before we go on to that, it says 64% of people experienced the mood dip in January, the January blues. And I do get it because- I do get it in the sense of the darkness. The darkness is- The darkness grips me. I keep thinking, it grips. It grips.

It grips. The darkness grips me. I'm a woman of light, you know. I feel that like if I was a faucet, like light would come out of my ears, any orifice that I've got. But I think when I swivel my head to the window and it's dark, I'm like, you should done. Yeah, it's really like especially after work. Especially after work. I can get away with darkness after seven. Yeah, I can. Yeah. Yeah. I personally wouldn't want to but I can. But at three or four. Yeah,

but no, no, it's a bit silly. And it's also one of those things when I go to work, if I'm opening the studio, guys, it's early. It's the butt crack of dawn. And I have to go get the key from this little alleyway. I'm walking down this little alleyway. Well that's scary. At five o'clock in the morning, and it's dark.

I enter the studio. I don't leave. And it's dark. No, that's not nice. And I's dark, I enter the studio, I don't leave and it's dark. No, that's not nice. And I'm like, I've seen no sunlight really. I completely agree. It's so sad. That's what gets me.

Like I need that vitamin D in my skin. Exactly. But I was going to ask how are you feeling about the January blues, but I feel like you've answered it. I've told you that in the sense that I didn't really get January blues and I've got quite nice things in January. Normally Archie's birthday, my sister's birthday, which I look forward to, but also I really like resolutions.

So I love that. And then this year I've got little women in January. So I'm still on top of my form and I'm going on the race. I feel like I'm really happy. You're on the wavelength of London. But I can so understand why people get Monday blues. It's one of those things as well that you're, it's exactly that, that you go back. I always find when people say, you know, with the excitement of starting a new job, it's not the first week

that's long, it's the second week where you're like, oh, this is like the vibe now. This is it. So I feel like it feels exactly like that second week of work. The first week of January, everyone's like on their fucking business. And then it just starts to relax and you think it's cold. It's snowed guys. It's snowed. It's fucking baltic. Honestly, I completely agree. I'm a very dramatic person, but I think I was feeling down because I couldn't exercise. I convinced myself I had seasonal affective disorder. I literally was like, it's the darkness. It grips you, I'm telling you. I literally felt so low this year. Usually the darkness, I'm like, cosy, cosy, let me cuddle up.

You usually love a bit of cosy. I usually love the winter love it but I'm actually craving summer. So then how do you feel about your birthday coming up? Because that for me is still winter. February? February and March. Well it is winter. I'm sure it is.

For me personally. For me that is winter. It is winter. It is winter on the cusp. For me like Friday comes after Thursday like no it is winter. It is winter on the cusp. For me, like Friday comes after Thursday, like, no, it doesn't. Categorically. It is. I think I'm excited because Love Island, well, Love Island would have started. When does it start? Starts on the 13th of January. Love Island All Stars is going to keep me pretty preoccupied during and also

guys. Do we know who's going on? Me and Archie did what we did last year and made a list. Oh, we guess. Oh, you did. We, you two are so fucking nice out there for about an hour going. We've given ourselves six boy suggestions, six girl suggestions. We've had to order them but yourselves not to get no each other. Most of had to order them. But yourselves, not to get like individually.

Most of ours are quite similar. And then we've also given ourselves two bombshell suggestions. When did you guys do this? We did this last night. But I was like, we've got a pretty solid thing. I actually think Archie's going to go 100%. What do you think it's all gonna be right? I think the people that he's guessed have all been spotted at the airport off to South Africa. So I'm literally like, I think he actually didn't do any cheateroos. I think he did cheateroo.

But I can't lie, I also cheaterooed. I had my suspicions. I just wanted to check my suspicions were on the money and they were. But that kind of like there'll be TV to watch. The Tracers. I love The Tracers. I'm obsessed. This is what gets us through Blue Monday. This is what gets us through Blue January. This is what gets us through Good TV. And I'm telling you Tracers is good. Guys I'd never seen, you know when you kind of get stubborn when someone tells you you're

like something so much. You. That's me with Rue Paul. Literally like you my family members people I work with. Your family like the traitors. My family love the traitors and everyone at uni was like you're telling me you haven't seen of all people you haven't seen the traitors. I was saying the same to you Kate they were like you would love it and I'm like guys I'm just not going to watch it. I've started, I started this year. Today during lunch, I heard you on it watching the bloody season one. I can't believe you would. And then a New Year's guys, Katie was at Archie's like we had a nice party at Archie's family

home in Oxford. And we played the bloody traitors like game. And I know you love it. I love what got you to watch it. Literally because I was like, this is really good. Well, because I thought and then you start explaining it. And I'm like, there's a drama game called Mafia. I thought, Oh my gosh, this is literally Mafia. Mafia. But it's like reality TV Mafia. So I was like, I'll tune in. Maybe I won't really. I tuned in on the second. So the first and second episode were already released watch the first one was instantly Claudia get on I We all watched it at home at my mom and dad's and we all are obsessed with the traitors But my mom and dad don't usually like reality TV, but they're like, this is the best thing

I it makes me fucking I die laughing. We need to actually tag the traitors in this clip guys It's so fucking Linda fucking like die laughing. We need to actually tag the traitors in this clip guys. It's so fucking Linda. She's kind of making me die is literally it was like traitors. Because I think I think Armani going she needed to go now she went in way too. I think what's the name Mina Mina? I could win. I think I think she's gonna go really far. I think you know what? She's playing it clever She really is doing a really good job of not making yourself too much too soon

Yeah, which means then you can establish for that which you now know exactly You're watching other series, she's then can establish those relationships. If you go in too hard, people are like, oh, but then again, if you're also too suspicious, it's a real balance. I'm watching season one at the moment, and the current traitors are Wilfred, Alyssa, and the Welsh lady. Amanda? Amanda. And they're all kind of, people are suspicious of Wil Yeah, Amanda Amanda. Yeah, and

They're all kind of that people are suspicious of Wilfred, which I'm like fair enough. Wilfred's kind of doing too much He's doing a week Amanda people don't have a fucking clue and I think Amanda's gonna do very well because she's giving my You know how it ends? No, okay. I'm not gonna tell you then People are now getting suspicious of Alyssa because she's all quiet. Do you know who I wished was a traitor who's just been killed? John! Can't remember. The bald massage therapist. Oh, lovely.

Yeah. He was ruthless. Yeah. I genuinely... It's when that guy was having a full-on fucking panic attack at the round table, had to leave, stop filming because he could not breathe having a panic attack. He comes back, he goes, very nice theatrics, but that's exactly what a fucking Tracer was. This is the best thing about this show. It's ruthless. Like people are like, like you must

have seen the episode where Freddie says to Armani's sister like, well I don't want to win now and she's like, yes. Then she goes into the round table and she's like I think Freddie's a Tracer. Then she turns on her own sister, which I did rate the button. I'm like, I love it. Because she knew, she said in the interviews three or four times, I've got a feeling. So then she knew. The thing that got me was that fucking, who said it that was like, healing people by day, killing them by night.

And Kaz was like, are you calling me our old shit, man? And everyone went, I'm so fucking out of pocket. And I think I was busy. I know. No, people take it personally, Katie. I was like, really personally, like, are you saying I'm a straight? Are you sorry? And you're like, my favorite, the thing that makes me, it makes me laugh so much. But the thing that makes me laugh the most is when they get up and they say when we all obviously know they're a faithful, they all go around and then they go, I'm a faithful and everyone just goes. It's Brian. We knew it, Dick. That's fantastic. And Linda goes, Linda, Linda, I want to go out for a coffee. She's a real family favourite in our household. Oh hi. We're all pissed in our snotty chikamis.

Her and her purple hair. She's so cute. I adore her. I'm a traitor. Traitor, traitor. And it's when she goes, oh my god, I just don't know who it will be. Oh my god, I can't believe they were faithful. I'm like, blasphemy.

I'm like, Linda, it's that one guy who's literally just voting out every single time, like Linda, I fucking know it's you, bitch. I, it's that one guy who's literally just voted out every single time like Linda, I fucking know it's you bitch. I know it's fucking you. To bet you know what though, it's Pat mentality. It's taught me how crazy group mentality is because the one person creates a semi good argument. Then everyone leaches on them. And then if you don't, they're like, why are you doing that? You protect someone, you're a traitor. And then you just get a target on your back. Yeah, yeah, and then if you don't, they're like, why are you doing? Why?

You're protecting someone, you're a traitor, and you just get a target on your back. Yeah, completely. I'd be a fucking terrible traitor. Yeah, yeah. I'd say in the interview with Claudia, I'd be like, make me a faithful. Please. Make me a faithful. You would be a shit traitor.

I'd be red constantly. I'd blush. I'd literally go pro. You would be red for the whole TV series. It would be absolutely terrible. We have a slightly off piece of shit guys. Okay, go on Katie. Tell me.

Yeah. We were saying good TV show, a good routine, a good little thing, comforts to look forward to. You need comforts in the blue Monday in the January time. So as we were saying, you need to keep, you need to get something for yourself in order to get through these horrible months. Exactly. Little comforts. I actually found, and I will bang this drum until I'm dead guys. Tell me. Get a sunrise lamp.

Oh, you love the sunrise lamp. The sunrise lamp changed my fucking life. And don't finally say lamp. Lamp. You were like lamp. Lamp. I thought I, I'll tell you, I love it. I think because genuinely, I've been like, as I wake up quite early for work, but now I'm part of my New Year's resolution is even on my day off to not like then sleep until like 11, like still get up at a reasonable hour.

Yeah, completely. And I found that like my sunrise alarm, because it starts rising ever so slightly, I wake up naturally before my alarm because the lights coming on and I'm like, oh, there's only 10 minutes. I'll just get up. It's delightful. I find the same with my eye mask. If I know, because my eye mask usually does fall off before I wake up. And if I've checked the time, like don't put it back on because I've realized it's way

worse than when I, the alarm goes off and I'm like, yeah, like that. I'm like, no, it is painful, but doable. Yeah. What else as well? Daily movement doesn't have to be exercise. I know everyone's like the whole concept of blue Monday is that maybe New Year's resolutions aren't working and you're feeling a bit down about it But like even like walking to work recently

I've only been doing it a few days But I found it's really nice is I get off to tube stops earlier than I need to and I walk home Really? Yeah, but you've walked home from like where passes green Bloody hell. Yeah, so does that take you? It's only about 45 minutes God, that's a bit too bad actually. Like 40 if I've got intention. Well, truthfully, I've been trying to not say I'm doing it because I feel like I'm going to curse that I'm doing it, but I've been trying to do the 75 hard. Oh my God, it's pretty stupid, truthfully.

It's like a wellness concept thing that for 75 days, you have to do two workouts. Okay, you can do that. One has to be outdoors. They have to be 45 minutes, then drink two liters of water, read 10 pages of a book, and then eat a healthy, balanced diet. Oh, that sounds fun. And I was like, that kind of seems, and you just have to do it for 75 days and like, That sounds really good.

So I've been like, so I usually do a Barry's and then I like walk home from Parsons Green. Love that. And then that's my two workouts and then I just have to read a fucking book. Oh, I know. I drink the water anyway. Two workouts a day, they said. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, sorry. But I count the walkers, I count the walkers like an outdoor worker. Like that's my hack around it. Yeah, but like I've been trying to do that. But like walking more has genuinely really helped and like I've been trying to listen to new podcasts as well. Because I sometimes get a bit, the only thing is that stops me out walking is I get bored. Yeah, I know what you mean. You need to have something stimulating. I tell you what you should, watch the bloody new Squid Games while you walk in that. I need to watch the new squid games. Do you know what I did the other day? I was getting

a bit stressed about this week is quite busy for me. And again, really, really stressed. So I was walking home from Parsons Green and I pretended I was on a phone call, but voice noted myself the entire time so I could verbally just speak out what I was like, gonna do this week. No way. I was like, oh yeah, so then this week and then I like went through it. So mentally I was like, yes, I'm doing- Get it out of my head. And this is-

Get it out. Yeah. It's so funny because my therapist says that like, if you're feeling a certain way, voice note her. Yes! Voice her and she doesn't listen back to it and I haven't as weird. I do find it quite strange. I usually like, I honestly think if I lost my phone someone listens to my voice And I'd be so fucked like

But shall we move on to show me dilemma, let's do dilemmas Yes, tell me kids and, and they said Kit, and with one T, which I was like Jack wouldn't be happy. No. Because he does two T's. Who does two T's? Hi Kit and Katie. Love the pod and always listen to it on my way to work. You guys have kept me through these horrible months.

Bless. I'm writing to you both because I'm at a loss and need some advice. I'll try to keep it short. Oh, don't worry about that. Yeah. So here's the deal. I've been dating my boyfriend. Won't say his name. That's fine. For three years. Congratulations!

Yeah, me too. Same for me. That's lovely. He's kind, thoughtful and everything you'd want in a boyfriend. But lately I've hit this weird plateau. Is that how you say it? Yeah. Plateau. It's not that we're fighting or anything. It's just fucking stale. Shit. Okay.

What is it called like roommate syndrome or something? Oh I don't know. Where like you're in a relationship but you just feel like there's no chemistry. So it just feels like you're roommates. Oh that's so shit. Okay. To say the spark is gone, I would be being honest. And every conversation feels like small talk. The worst part is I found myself increasingly drawn to his friend. Him and I have always had a good rapport. But over the holidays during Christmas something shifted We ended up talking for hours at a house party on New Year's Eve

While my boyfriend was off with his mates and hardly even acknowledged me Okay The chat was deep meaningful and unlike anything I've had with my boyfriend for months Okay Since then his friend has been texting me and I've caught myself smiling at my friend more than I'd like to admit. Now, with Blue Monday looming, so this must have been sent in a few days ago, and all its dreary vibes, I can't help but feel this overwhelming sense of dread about my relationship

because I don't really know if I am fawning for the friend because he's different and exciting other than actually something I'm interested in. Or is this a sign that my relationship has run its course? The idea of hurting my boyfriend terrifies me, but staying with him out of comfort feels just completely wrong. I feel like a villain in my own story and I don't know what to do. Do I risk it or not? Hoping it's just a phase. Please help. I'm spiraling.

RISK IT! What did you think? Well, I'm like, it's a new year. If you think it's stale, three years, right? It's only going to get more stale the longer, like usually people say the longer in a relationship, the more like the by percentage starts to dwindle, right? 100%. Yeah. So it's only statistically going to get worse.

And if you're only think, if you're still thinking we have no chemistry, it's only small talk, I feel like, and when his friend texts me my phone lights up, like I'm so excited. I feel like your guts telling you something there. Also, I'm like, this is a classic. If you can't choose between two men, none of them are right. Because and if you're dating one of them and have been in a relationship, for example, Archie, oh my god, I don't know what's up with this at the moment, but we are still honeymooning. I love this, because every time I check in you're like, I'm like still there. We are like amazing.

Yeah. Three years in and we're still honeymooning. And I know everyone's in their different like stages and stuff, but I'm saying there's no way Archie has ever made me feel like a roommate. And I think if he did, we'd have serious problems. Yeah. Yeah. And I think if you're really feeling like this, he didn't acknowledge you on New Year's Eve.

I'm sorry. I just feel like, I think you need to break up with this guy. Yeah. And I think, and obviously I don't know your situation. I don't know if you guys live together or whatever, but if it's possible, I think you just need your own space. Yeah. Because I think the fact that you're starting to get interested in other people is great, but not if you're in a relationship. Yeah, it seems like you're mentally cocked out.

100%. I think you need to just like, cut your losses and cut your ties with this guy. Even if you're like, well, I don't want to lose him. Okay, then say to him, I really need my own space. Can we go on a break? I'm not really for breaks, but if you're like, yeah, let's go on a break for six weeks, which is a long break. You know, you might feel so liberated and it, yeah. Oh, I can go out and be experienced more things. Or you might think, oh my God, I really wasn't appreciating him. Yes. That's my advice.

Yeah, I completely agree. My one is, Hi girls, I'm Sarah and I'm really struggling with- Hello Sarah. I know. Hello Sarah. I do that sometimes. You know when you write an email? No. You go, Hi, hi all. My name's Katie. My name's Katie. It's like, Hi Katie. Hey girl. And I'm really struggling with the January blues this year. The holidays were great but now that I'm feeling re-drained and unmotivated, it doesn't help that work has picked up again and I'm already feeling overwhelmed by new projects and goals. I know

I'm supposed to be excited about the new year and all the possibilities, but I just can't seem to shake off the sense of exhaustion and lack of enthusiasm. To make things even more complicated, my family have these big traditions around the start of the year. They expect us to gather and share our resolutions and discuss how we plan to improve and generally talk about how we're going to crush the year ahead. I get that it's meant to be uplifting, but it honestly just feels like another layer of pressure. I feel like I'm supposed to have everything figured out and be full of energy, but I don't. I'm just trying to get through each day. Fair enough.

So now I'm stuck. I want to take care of myself and focus on getting out of this funk, but I also don't want to disappoint my family. They're really excited about these traditions and I don't want to seem ungrateful or like I'm avoiding them, but at the same time, I know I'm not in the right headspace to talk about how I'm going to level up this year. So my question is, shall I just go along with what's expected and try to fake it till I make it, even though I'm not feeling it? Or should I be honest with my family and let them know I need a little more space and time to focus on myself even if this means disappointing them? How can I balance my own mental health with family expectations without feeling like I'm failing either at once?

Oh my god. I know. You're spiraling. I know. It's so fine. You are like, you is fine. First thing, if they're great family, which they sound that they are, and that they aim to uplift, you need to 100% be honest. You need to say to them, I am feeling so. Also, can I say that sometimes I feel like it's a little bit hard when December's amazing, don't get me wrong, but it's so socially draining.

Oh, it's so intense. It's so socially draining that when you get to January, like, I almost need January to recover then I can start my New Year's. Yes, literally. I completely like understand why you're feeling so drained at the moment. I think you need to explain this to your family and be like, I've really felt overwhelmed right now. I feel so emotional.

I don't think I could cope with this. I just need some time to gather myself. And of course they're going to support you. Rather than you going, saying what you're going to do and snapping at other people because they are suppressioning you, you feel overwhelmed. As Katie and I touched with earlier, you really need to find a way of going through this, whether this is enjoying more time outside, or whether it is getting a good show and saying I'm going to have at least half an hour to just be in like chill mode. You need to really find some downtime because at the moment it

sounds like you're going 100 miles an hour, but you definitely need to tell your family because that has stressed me out if it's like how are you all bettering yourselves and I'm like, really don't want to talk about it. Yeah you need to defo speak yeah I 100% agree I think you've got it good luck darling good luck should we do aches? aches! I've got one yes I've got two all right then you can think wrong way All right, then you can think wrong way. Okay, my it this week is the inability for people to say they are wrong. Yeah, someone recently has come into my life. Yeah, like within the last few months. And they cannot admit they're wrong. They cannot say oh shit, yeah, sorry, I'm wrong or like, oh gosh, I got that wrong. Yeah, sorry, sorry, that was on me. They cannot say, oh shit, yeah, sorry, I'm wrong. Or like, oh gosh, I got that wrong. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, sorry, that was on me.

They cannot, there's always an excuse. Well, you didn't tell me that bit of info. Well, no, because I was just being, and it's like, oh, did you have so much pride that you can't say sorry? Literally just apologizes. Yeah, but it really started to get in my bloody gums. It is one of those things that like,

I hate it when it is deflected back onto you, like it's a you issue. And I'm like, you, if no one, like if no one tells you anything, like for example, like if I do something that everyone else was told, oh, don't do this, remember, don't do this, but no one tells me and I do it. And they kick off at me and I go on, I'm sorry, like no one told me I couldn't do this. And they're like, yeah, yeah, well, you're just not meant to do it and they kick off at me and I go on I'm sorry like no one told me I couldn't do this. Yeah, yeah, well, you're just not meant to do it. 100% just be like sorry. Oh my gosh, I completely forgot to tell you it's fine. 100%. I'll give you a perfect example. Okay. Went to get my hair done. It was amazing. Gorgeous. A few days later had a literal orange halo. I was like, Oh my god, what is going on? Now I had used fake tan, but I've

also been dying my hair since I was 13. Yeah. And I use fake tan frequently. Yeah. I have never had this in my whole life. It's like, what is this? Like, maybe it needs a bit more toner. Yeah. Anyway, I go in the hairdresser who did my hair was lovely. She was like, sometimes this can happen. It's something she was like, to be honest, I don't know. But of course I'll fix it. The owner of the fucking hairdressers came over and said, I could fucking slap you. I was like, excuse me. She didn't say fucking. She was like, oh, I could slap you.

I was like in front of the whole salon and I went to me. I went, excuse me. And she went, oh, well, why did you do that? And I said, I hardly see how it's my fault. The fact that I wasn't told I was supposed to use fake tan. She was like, oh. But like you've used fake tan when you've had your hair dyed before. Exactly.

That's why I didn't put it on your head. Well exactly. And she was so rude that I was like, why can't you just say that you're in the wrong? Weird. It was really pissed me off. Yeah, weird. I was like, that is a big it. I know. Right. You ready?

Yeah. I had an experience where people like sometimes I don't understand. I'm all about going above and beyond for people. But like this one woman at work lost a glove, like one glove, singular glove. Okay. And when? That's the thing I should say. Say, say something. No, it was just that she was like, can you go check inside the locker? And I was like, sure, like is the locker not?

And she was like, yeah, I'll show you to my locker. I'm like, sure. The locker was locked and sometimes they get stuck. So I thought, oh, maybe she means she's locked herself out and the gloves in there. So I'm like, oh, got you. So I opened the locker for her and then there's people stuff in there. And then she was like, yeah, it's in here. And I said, Oh, well, someone's stuff's in here. And then she goes, yeah, I left it in here. So could you just rummage around this person's personal property? You can't do that.

And go find it. And I said, no. And she was so butthurt. She was so pissed off that I wouldn't go to another woman's stuff, like take people's stuff out of a locker to look for her glove. And I was like, what did she say to you? She was like, I just don't understand why you can't do it. I said, well, I said, personally, I don't feel like you would feel comfortable if you came out of a workout and a staff member was rummaging through your locker with your stuff in it. I was like, I just feel like it's just not, that's not right. Heather Miedema That's so weird. Chantelle You know, just general,

general like rudeness and expectations that some people have sometimes that I'm literally like, Heather Miedema Wow. Chantelle Wow. Heather Miedema What are you doing? Chantelle I don't understand. Heather Miedema That's so rude. Chantelle Yeah. Heather Miedema God, I just don't understand. That's so rude. Yeah. Like, yeah. Yeah. God, I just don't. Some people just expect you to just be like,

sure. Well, why not just do it? And it's like, yeah, but you haven't even thought about the other person. I know it always really upsets me as well. I'm usually quite like, really nice at work. But then when people are, and I usually I'm like here to like take this, you know, blah, blah, blah, really generally quite nice if there's a little bit extra in a smoothie and they're like, Oh, could I get the little bit and then lovely I'm like, of course, like, sure, like, so I'm like, just wash it up anyway, like, no problem. And then, but when people are like, I'll have this movie and then I'll have whatever's extra, then I'm now don't want to do it for you. How do I know? Then it's when he gets here, like, now you won't need't want to do it for you. How am I not going to know it? Then it's when it gets to you like

now you won't. You just want to pour it down the sink. There it goes. Yeah it's rude. And what was your other it? Sorry I realised that I should have ping-ponged you first. My other it is I've had it recently with

people interrupting. And it's my base. It's my alpha it. It's like alpha-ick. It's like my ick is people interrupting. I don't know why it but hurts me so much, but it genuinely causes me upset. Niamh Like when people, I'm in a conversation and I'm constantly getting interrupted, it makes me genuinely feel like I could cry. Like it upsets me. It's so lame.

It's so icky to me because I'm like you can clearly see I'm talking. Yeah and you've literally just rammed it all over me. You literally. You've just hit me. So annoying. Yeah. Right. Question.

Ready for questions? Question theory. And I'm serious. Yeah. Right. Right. Ready for questions? Questions, really? And I'm serious. So tell me. So how do you think you can tell if January blues are just a normal seasonal slump or if you think it's time to make change

and improve your well-being and look into your mental health and self-improvement? OK. Well, I think you can tell the difference if it's like you're still doing all your normal routines and that like they've always worked and you've always like been fine with them. Yeah. But literally just this month, you feel a bit off. Yeah. Then I think it's probably more seasonal. But if you're doing your hobbies or doing your interests and you're like, this is so dumb. Yeah. And you're like, I'm really not getting, because personally, okay, it gets dark. But for me, I'm like, yeah, but I get to do my acting later. Yeah. Yeah. I want to do for my whole life. I get to be a performer. Yeah. Then that's great.

I'm not like, oh, I've got to do this. I'm like, no, this is, yeah, this is why I want to do it. This is so exciting. So for me, I know that that's more the weather. But if someone's like, for example, wants to be a professional tennis, you know, okay, and they go to tennis nights, so dull, then I'm like, maybe you should start looking into your life. Maybe there's something you want to do that's new. Yeah, yeah, I get you. Okay. So I say question.

If you could have any celebrity voice narrate your life like in your ear, so it's like Casey's left the building. Yeah, yeah, you know, and it's just like she's walking down the street Yeah, you know care in the world. How would it be and Would you make them? Would you like them would you tell them the narration that you like or would you give them, would you like them, would you tell them the narration that you like or would you give them full writing? I would, do you know what's funny? And I feel like it's because I've been listening to them so much recently on my walks.

I would have Chris and Rosie Ramsey from the Shag Married Annoyed podcast narrate my life. Because I think their general commentary on life is just so entertaining. Really? And I feel like Rosie would be like, the kind of cute like, well, and off she goes, you know, to kind of like, you know how the couch 5k can have Sarah Millican in your ear? Yeah, I always have Sarah Millican when I do couch 5k. Brilliant. But like, they would be like so nice. But then Chris would be like, oh, here she goes again. And she's off to the fucking pub about to get partied by another guy. And then, and then Rosie would be like, but she looks really beautiful. And I'd be like, yeah, thanks.

I would love it. And that's kind of good, like a little duo. Yeah, I like that. Who would you have? I've got two. So my first one, I thought of doing Laura Whitmore and Ian Sterling. That'd be, that's a great one. I listen to their podcast all the time and I love got two. So my first one I thought of doing Laura Whitmore and Ian Sterling. I listen to their podcast all the time and I love their dynamic. And I thought if he was just like,

like broadcasting me 24 seven, my narrator, it's like Love Island. It's fun. That would be good. So cute. Like she is just, it's kind of like the same with yours. She's down to earth. She'd be like, look at her say, and he'd just be like, you know, you're on the ground. Or I thought Reese Witherspoon, because I just love her and I thought it would make me feel like an official L words. That would be so great. All the girl that does gossip girl. Kristen Bell. Or maybe I would have fucking Sarah Jessica Parker. So like Sex and the City. So my life would be like Sex and the City. Love that.

So good. That is a really good one. Yeah. Fuck. Guys we're going to the end of the app. I know. I hope we've helped a little bit with that Blue Monday. Yeah.

And at least always remember that if there's anything more you're struggling with, please look for more help online because we're just here for a little bit of fun. Yeah. All right, guys. We love you. Love you, have a great day. Bye. Bye.

I've got a rebel soul. I've got a rebel soul. I've got a rebel soul. I've got a rebel soul.