The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett - Moment 146: 3 Simple Steps That Guarantees Ultimate Happiness (Jay Shetty's Happiness Model)

Episode Date: January 26, 2024

In this moment, the podcaster, author, and life coach, Jay Shetty discusses how he believes people can find happiness. Jay says that it can be found in two forms, the sort of happiness that comes from daily habits and a more enriching happiness that arises out of deeper purposes. While most of us know what we can do for our daily happiness levels, deeper happiness that comes from finding our meaning and purpose in life is more complicated and vague. However, for Jay this deeper happiness comes from locating your passion, and more than just finding what you love, using this passion in the service of others, as this brings the most enriching happiness in life. Listen to the full episode here - https://g2ul0.app.link/AnKy3upqEGb Watch the Episodes On Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/c/%20TheDiaryOfACEO/videos Jay: https://www.jayshetty.me https://www.instagram.com/jayshetty/?hl=en Sponsors: Huel Bundle: https://try.huel.com/steven-bartlett Eightsleep: https://www.eightsleep.com/uk/steven/ CODE: STEVEN (save $150 on the Pod Cover) Linkedin Ads: https://www.linkedin.com/doac24

Quick one, just wanted to say a big thank you to three people very quickly. First people I want to say thank you to is all of you that listen to the show. Never in my wildest dreams is all I can say. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd start a podcast in my kitchen and that it would expand all over the world as it has done. And we've now opened our first studio in America, thanks to my very helpful team led by Jack on the production side of things. So thank you to Jack and the team for building out the new American studio.

And thirdly to Amazon Music who, when they heard that we were expanding to the United States and I'd be recording a lot more over in the States, they put a massive billboard in Times Square for the show. So thank you so much, Amazon Music. Thank you to our team. And thank you to all of you that listened to this show. Let's continue. Over the years, I've tried to kind of simplify what happiness is. And I sit here with my guests and Mogadat was great at that as well. Yeah, of course. He's unbelievable at kind of the concept of happiness. What are the kind of simple fundamentals that Jay Shetty requires in his life to live a happy life? I'm going to use the word happy. I know it's a shitty word in many respects but i just want to use that as the the word yeah i'd say that i look at happiness as daily habits and then

deeper purpose so there's things you can do daily that keep that happiness kind of moving and feel it's growing and then there's almost the objective, the compass, the reason why you live and why you exist. And for me, it's been really clear that finding your passion and using it in the service of others is what you excel at, what you're brilliant at, and then you can actually use that to improve people's lives. And you can use that skill, that passion, that energy to make a difference in someone's life. There is no better feeling than that. And what I find is I meet a lot of people who've mastered their passion, but not for service. They mastered it for business. They mastered it for money. They mastered it for success. And they have all of that, but they haven't got the service element in their life. They don't understand how to use their passion for a purpose. And so they feel unequipped. And then I know lots of people who are trying to serve or trying to make a

difference or trying to do charity work. They're trying to do all this good work and they feel good about it, but they still don't feel fulfilled because they're missing what is my special role? Like what's my position? What's my offering in this space? You kind of get lost after a while. And so to me, happiness is where both come together, where it's like, I know what I love and what makes me happy. And when I do that for others to improve their lives, it makes them happy. So if you can do what makes you happy and do it for others and it makes them happy, that's going to give you happiness. And I have tested that principle time and time again with clients, with friends, with family, with myself, and I've seen it to be true again and again and again. But that's that bigger happiness piece.

Let's go to the daily habits, like the daily stuff. And I want to try and avoid the stuff that I think people have heard and people have probably come across before in many different places. Maybe I've spoken about them, maybe other people have. But one of the biggest ones for me is I read a book a few years ago about flow state

and that book really transformed how I felt about things. And it talks about how being in flow is the intersection where your skills and your challenge match. So if your skills are higher than your challenge, you'll feel bored, lethargic, and maybe feel stuck. But if your challenge is greater than your skills you feel overwhelmed potentially depressed and disconnected and disappointed so most of us are living in one of those discrepancies and i find on a daily basis i'm playing around with that equation for happiness because that flow state of when you know you have a skill and your challenge is met, and even if you lose, you still get such a joy out of it because you know that you're still

working in the right direction. And I think that is an underplayed part of happiness because it doesn't sound like something predictable or obvious because people go, well, that's achievement, that's ambition. It's actually not. It's just saying for most people, it's either or. Their challenges are greater than their skill Or their skills are greater than their challenge So I would ask everyone to say Look at your life Do you need to improve your skills?

Or do you need to broaden your challenge? Is this a year of expanding your challenges? Or is this a year of broadening your skills? And I promise you If you start with that You're going to get so busy and active Changing one of those That you're going to get so busy and active changing one of those, that happiness is going to naturally flow.

This comes into a little model I created of creating happiness for my year. And that one sits in one of them. So I'll explain which one it's in. I believe that to create happiness day to day in one year, in one month, in a week, you have to have three things. You have to learn something every year, you have to launch something every year,

and you have to love something every year. And that's how I've lived for the last three to five years. Every year I'm learning something, every year I'm launching something, and every year I'm loving something. And I'll give you an example. So when I talk about flow state, that comes into the idea of raising your challenge is like launching something. The reason why launching something creates happiness is because it creates a feeling of nervousness.

It creates a feeling of butterflies. It creates a feeling of excitement. Like, I don't know what's gonna happen. We all need a feeling of surprise in life. We all need that feeling of like i don't know what's gonna happen we all need a feeling of surprise in life we all need that feeling of i don't know the sense of the unknown can actually cause happiness and so launching something is such a powerful way and i think too many people will think for five years and think for 10 years and maybe launch one thing in their whole life and me and you but i, I mean, I'd love

to, I can't wait to interview on my podcast, but I have launched so much stuff that has failed. We're going to get into that. Yeah. But that launch creates so much joy. It creates so much happiness. So launch something and we can dive into that. Then there's learn something, which is what we just talked about, learning a skill. So that's the, that's the idea of creating your flow state by saying, what skill do I want to learn and every year I pick a skill And it's usually based on what I want to launch the next year. So I'll go okay. I need to learn podcasting So 2018 I studied podcasting 2019. We launched the podcast

So what you learn turns in what to what you launch and what you launch turns into what you love and What we try and do is you try and do it the other way around we try and love something Before we learn and launch it the other way around. We try and love something before we learn and launch it. It doesn't make sense. You've got to learn about something first and then you can fall in love with it. You can't love something and then learn about it. You can, but it doesn't always work that way. So I try and plan my years out in that way. I go, what am I going to learn? What am I going to launch? And what am I going to love? So yeah, I think that's how I try and create happiness on a daily, weekly, monthly basis without diving into things like gratitude and meditation, which are huge parts of my daily

happiness. But I think those are ideas that are out there and that we've talked about before probably.