The Digression Sessions - Ep. 116 - Tok Moffat & Ryan Neser!

Episode Date: May 5, 2014

Twitter - @BetterRobotJosh - Josh Kuderna @MichaelMoran10 - Michael Moran @DigSeshPod - Dig Sesh @RyanNesser - Ryan Nesser @TheTokMoff - Tok Moffat @WreckedComedy - Wrecked Em Comedy Hola DigHeads! On this week’s episode, Mike has to work and Josh sits down with a couple of hilarious dudes named Tok Moffat and Ryan Nesser! Funny stand ups in their own right and they produce comedy shows all of over Maryland, which you can check out right here! The Cellar Door is one of the funnest rooms to do in Maryland! Josh, Ryan, and Tok discuss doing comedy shows when the crowd only wants to have a drunken dance party, Molly vs. Church, doing shows at biker bars, Josh’s girlfriend and how’s she totally real, stand up in shorts, and more! Thanks for all the love Dig Heads! If you can swing it please drop our asses a few bones via the “Donate” button on the website. Also please subscribe to Digression Sessions on Stitcher and iTunes. Thanks everyone! We love you!

Welcome to the Digression Sessions Podcast. Hey everybody, I'm Josh Koderna. And I'm Mike Moran. And you're listening to the Digression Sessions Podcast, a Baltimore-based comedy talk show hosted by two young, handsome stand-up comedians slash improvisers join us every week as we journey through the world of comedy and the bizarreness of existence as we interview local and non-local comedians writers musicians and anyone else we find creative and interesting yes

who's the guest this week ryan nazer and tock moffitt are the guests on this week's program. Two super funny fellas based out of the D.C. Maryland area. Tak is at the Tak Moff on Twitter. That's T-H-E-T-O-K M-O-F-F-F, but you knew that already, Tak Moff. I mean, it's a very

you know, it's a cliche Twitter name at this point. And Ryan, you can follow Ryan on Twitter as well. He is at Ryan, N-E-S-S-E-R. And they also put on shows together, these two fellas. They produce comedy shows in the Frederick, Maryland area, and they're going to start doing some in Baltimore as well. So to stay up to date on that, you can find them on Twitter at Wrecked Comedy. So yeah, this is a really fun episode with them. Josh Coderna here, by the way, flying solo on the intro and also on the episode. But we're going to get into that in a second.

I just want to take a second to plug some stuff for your favorite pair of earbuds here. Got a bunch of shows coming up. This week, Friday, May 9th, I'll be doing an improv show. I'll be doing a duo with the very funny Michael Johnson, who's a really funny DC improviser. And he normally plays with another fella named Sean Westfall of Sean Michaels. Those guys are great. So Mike's going to come up and we're going to do a show together. We haven't practiced, but it's improv. We'll figure it out. It should be a lot of fun.

That's Friday, May 9th. And that will be in Baltimore. And then let's see here. Saturday, May 10th, I'll be doing stand-up for the Charm City Comedy Festival at 5 o'clock. That's going to be at the 2640 Space, which is a really cool church slash venue here in Baltimore. And then I'll be doing improv that night at 8 o'clock as well. You can see Mike Moran, the other half of your favorite pair of earbuds. He'll be at Coco Lane in Ellicott City on Wednesday, May 7th.

And definitely go check that out. Let's see what else we got going on here. What else we got going on? Professional intro. Oh, yeah. Let's see. Friday, May 16th, I'll be in Easton, Maryland at the Avalon Theater. And I'm going to be hosting a show for the very funny Mike Fonazzo.

He'll be headlining and I'll be hosting. And then Jessica Brodkin will be the feature. That show's going to be a lot of fun. And as always, you can go to digressionsessions.com slash calendar for all of our upcoming shows and all that stuff. So we're always doing stand-up, always doing improv. Come see us doing some stuff live. That would be awesome. We always have free stickers and stuff on us too.

So I just want to say thank you guys so much for listening. As always, we really appreciate it. And, yeah, I hope you guys are having a good day. I'm having quite the little Sunday here. Went for a jog with the dog, but not before locking myself in the house. Don't you hate that? Oh, boy. Still got laundry to do and the dishes.

A man's work is never done. Am I right, fellas? Hey, fellas. All right. All right. All right. What if I just do that in like 19 more minutes? All right. Okay. So rambling intro almost coming to a close. Follow me on Twitter. I'm at BetterRobotJosh. Also on Instagram if you guys want to find me there. And Mike Moran is at MichaelMoran10 on Twitter. Him and I need to do an episode soon. We're having some scheduling conflicts. Got to work some stuff out.

But, yeah, that said, Tak Moffat and Ryan Nazer, two really funny guys. This was a lot of fun to do this show. Ryan showed up a little late. So me and Tak, we handle it in the beginning. Just, you know, kind of talking. And just talking, I talking. But he's never heard that one before.

Okay. Really funny show. Really funny guys. Good times all around. Thank you guys for listening. And finally, we love y'all. Alright. Alright.

Okay. Alright. Podcasting. We are podcasting. By the way, I was listening to the last podcast I was on with Danny. My voice is a lot higher when I hear it. are podcasting by the way i was listening to the the last podcast i was on with uh danny yeah my voice is a lot higher when i hear like to me right when i'm talking to you right now it kind of sounds like deep kind of like you know i've got bass in my voice i totally don't have any yeah i totally don't have any bass in my voice in your mind you just say hey man what's going on it's the same thing like when i when i uh like listen to my recordings for comedy or watch myself and

i'm like man i thought I sounded a lot like, I don't know, man. Anyway. Yeah. Am I black? I can't even, when I see myself.

Listen, I, I've only been awake for a couple minutes. Haven't had my coffee, but I'm fairly certain you're black. Fairly certain. Well, let me just take a little peek down.

Yeah. Yep. No, I like, uh, yeah. Yeah. Story checks out. Um, no, I like, uh, hearing checks out um no i like uh hearing yourself on a podcast

as a new hearing yourself on an answering machine right you know like oh do i really sound like that yeah oh weird yeah i was like my voice you know i have a and then i have like a funny laugh too i was listening my life i was like oh my goodness that's so like annoying you know what i mean man what's weird because comedians normally aren't such fragile people. They're normally just steadfast, tough guys. I think it's when you have an opportunity. We have such an opportunity to judge ourselves on a regular

basis. Most people are like, I heard myself. I was hanging out and someone recorded it. Once, that one time in 2007. We are like every single week. Right. And like you hear just little nuances in your voice.

And, you know, so. No. Yeah, it is the worst. Well, the worst and the best. I guess if you get used to it eventually. Yeah. Yeah. And they start accepting. You're like, all right, that's just how I sound.

And then you kind of work it to your advantage. Yeah. So talk Moffat sitting here with me. We're waiting on Ryan Nazer. We're starting in the middle of a scene, man. Yeah. Just like an improv with me. We're waiting on Ryan Nazer. We're starting in the middle of a scene, man. Yeah. Just like an improv, right? Just like an improv scene, man.

We already got a relationship. We're just trying to figure out the game, right? You know? So Ryan's a little late. He's your partner. You guys run shows. Absolutely. In Frederick, right?

Yeah. Cellar Door, which is now going to be a weekly show, right? Yeah, Cellar Door is now a weekly Sunday show. Which is, luckily, at the Cellar Door, which is now going to be a weekly show, right? Yeah, Cellar Door is now a weekly Sunday show. Which is, luckily, at the Cellar Door. That's synergy right there. Yeah, it's perfect. It works out. So we have a weekly show and biweekly.

Our main show is a Sunday showcase, and so we have a book like Headliner, National Headliner, and Feature, the one that you've been on and everything. Yeah. And you rock it on and everything. Yeah. Yeah. And you rock it out. Oh, yeah. And then on the off Sundays, like today is an off Sunday.

It's our first open mic type format. It's kind of like we'll just have like a booked kind of feature and then like, you know, folks. And so it's not as I wouldn't say it's I don't want to say it's not as serious but it's it's it's it's not as a big of a deal as the sunday showcase right right right and uh and i would say for the comics listening or anybody in the area definitely check those out because the sunday shows are awesome cellar door is so cool because it's it's a basement basically but so it has the low ceilings and they turn the lights off and there's candles it looks like a like a comedy room from like the 50s i imagine or something it's got a good setup and what helps to our advantage is that when like

people go there to sell a door before there was comedy to hang out yeah and so there was not i mean there's not there's two tvs that they're one of them was just recently put in yeah and so like they've never been it's never been a place where you go to watch sports you know right right it works out to our advantage so people come there and they're like hey we're gonna you know we're gonna come here and hang out anyway so yeah um there's no distractions and people are not like oh well you know there are 10 tvs here like most bar shows are yeah exactly and they're all on sorry i'm interrupting the game guys yeah i'm almost done yeah um so yeah well why would we wait for ryan you're telling me about a show you did in the wild and wonderful West Virginia.

Yes, West Virginia, which it was in this place called Parkersburg, West Virginia. And so I don't know if you – Oh, Parkersburg. Oh, yeah, of course. We've all heard of that. It's the third largest city. I was, like, looking up some facts there. Third largest city in West Virginia, which is not saying much because it's literally – I mean, it's probably as big as this area, Hamden.

Uh-huh um and it's the third largest like the city limits are probably a lot larger but like there's like nothing there yeah like we're putting in a new stop sign yeah kind of a big deal yeah like did you see that yield sign yeah just go but uh it's a yield sign yes i was like looking it up i was like all right you know it's you know it, it's got like four black people there. Was that on the Wikipedia page too? Like third largest, but four black people. Yeah, but four black people. Also the last state in the union to – but so anyway.

Home of separate drinking fountains. So Parkersburg and um uh so anyway um so the state motto of west virginia is is now i forget what it was before but it's or it was uh just as beautiful as heaven or something like that it was like almost heaven or something like that sure and now it's open for business that's what the state motto is it's open for business sold out yeah they're like like uh we need we want to bring in more business here yeah and we're open for it yeah so anyway so we're pumped about this show you know they had pre-sale tickets um by the way that's uh that's also your mom's motto hey hello zingers zingers dagger uh getting morning radio up in here so uh yeah and so like it was at this place called west virginia polo club which is the total opposite of what we thought it was gonna be

because i i saw the name i was like west virginia polo club it's probably like a country club it's gonna be like pretty sweet yeah get there it was total opposite of it's like biker bar redneck hillbilly central so it's like ironically named, it was great marketing because it's like if you're coming from out of town, you're like, hmm, where would I want to go? That sounds nice. Yeah, especially if you're, you know, not to say that they're not sophisticated. If they're not sophisticated bikers. If you were looking for someplace and you'd be like, oh, well, you know, do I go to the bar called Hot Spot or do I go to a place called the Polo Club? Right, right, right.

You go to Polo Club. So anyway, we get there. Yeah, like Hog Heaven and Wheelies hog heaven and wheelies like oh we'll avoid that spot yeah polo club it's one of those towns that like you know when you hear of like other countries being like behind like united states for like three or four years like that town is behind the dc area like three or four years like people are still wearing like what, what are those shirts that those, like, those are MMA guys, like, wear. Oh, like, affliction shit. Affliction, yeah, they're wearing that. Like, dudes that are, like, 50 years old are wearing that.

You know what I mean? They have the bedazzled jeans. Yeah, yeah. Like, what's going on? Yeah. So it was, like, one of those things. So I'm, like, checking out the scene, and I'm like, oh, man, this is gonna be,

this is gonna be fun. Yeah. Of course, like, all white people. I'm not, you know, I'm not not used to that, but, like, it's just, like, they were, like, the redneck hillbilly kind, and I was like, all right, well, this is gonna be fun yeah of course of course like all white people i'm not you know i'm not not used to that but like it's just like uh-huh they were like the redneck hillbilly kind and i was like all right well this is gonna be interesting it's definitely gonna be a learning experience no matter what happens i'm definitely gonna grow from this yeah yeah maybe get a story out of it yeah and so i was more leaning on the side of like i hope i get a story out of it because the host

was a semi-professional wrestler. That's amazing. So I'm like, does he have any background in comedy or hosting or anything? Like, no, no, no. He talks all the time in wrestling. I mean, I guess that is kind of a performance. I don't know. I mean, I haven't seen – what's his name? Cole Cash.

Cole Cash. Cole Cash, yeah. Okay, got some alliteration there. That's strong. Yeah, Cole Cash. And on the flyer, he had his belt on his shoulder, like, you know, legit wrestler. But, I mean, you know the dynamics of being able to host, especially. Yeah, hosting's very hard.

Yeah, and so, like, if you're a wrestler and you're talking, there are people rowdy anyway. Like, you don't expect it to be quiet. You know what I mean? He keeps addressing everybody as brother. You listen here, brother. You're next comic. Yeah, we have to have, like, a little silence, or at least people paying attention so he goes up there so i'm like you know i'm like all right well um you know before he goes up i'm like he's like what kind

of things you want me to say you go up there i'm like yeah i perform at dc improv like you know perform all of it all over the dc maryland virginia area blah blah blah yeah and so he's like all right cool so i'm like all right well, it sounds like he knows what he wants to say. Uh-huh. All right. So fast forward to the show beginning. Uh-huh. He just kind of gets on stage. Yeah.

Gets on stage and just starts talking. He's like, all right. And people are still talking. He doesn't say, hey, guys, we're starting a comedy show. Like, make sure your cell phones are off and table talk because we want to hear these people. Yeah. Like the decompression. Kind of like, okay, this is what it's going it's gonna be yeah let's all get used to it yeah yeah and none of that none of that none of that just none of the warm-up just like directly into

jokes right so he's like all right uh oh yeah and so i'm next so i'm like oh my goodness like this is this guy's not setting me up for success and people are like yelling and talking like screaming and everything oh not at him but just like to each other yeah to each other to each other and uh and of course like some of his friends are like what's up buddy and i'm like cold man that body slam and i'm just like oh man here we go like uh it's gonna be a good story it's gonna be a good story everything's good everything all these are good yeah basically and also too when you say this is going to be a good story it means it's going to be a good story. Everything's good. All these are good. Yeah. Basically. And also, too, when you say this is going to be a good story, it means it's going to be a horrible experience in the present. But eventually, tragedy plus time might equal comedy.

Right. Exactly. But yeah. So you're still not looking forward to it. Yeah. I'm like, all right. They're not paying attention. I can tell he's winding down his set.

And he's just talking about wrestling. He's like, yeah, people always ask me. I can barely hear this. But he's like like people always ask me if wrestling is real that's the punch line no and i'm like oh man here we go yeah i was gonna say were there any jokes or anything or is he just kind of like conversationally like well uh that's a it's funny you ask. To him, those were jokes. Gotcha. To him, that question was a joke. Yeah, he's like, I mean, come on, right? I mean, who asks questions? People?

Are you with me? Anyway, the next guy, his name is Talk. Yeah, this guy coming. I didn't even say my whole name. He's like, next guy performs at DC Improv. Talk. I'm just like, all right, here we go. And that was probably confusing for them, too, because he was probably, it seemed like to the crowd, they were like, he just tells to talk?

He's from the DC Improv. Talk. Like, just the confusion all around. Yeah, it might explain why they started talking more. Now start talking. Yeah. All right, so the stage all around. Yeah. It might explain why they started talking more. Now start talking. Yeah. All right. So the stage is set.

This crowd is fired up. The stage is set. People have their backs turned to me. Of course, they're drinking Budweiser and Bud Light. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And saying man after everything. Man. Like, oh, man, look at that.

What's that black guy doing here, man? He lost. What's wrong with him it's cold gonna suplex him get him cold get him yeah and so i was like all right uh how do i like ease up into this i'm like oh hey guys i'm talking like i'm not a wrestler and they kind of like laughed at that and i was like hey keep it going for your host and blah blah blah and like they're like so i'm like doing the hosting yeah like you're kind of resetting everything like all right let's smooth out the edges here a little bit i'm like and by the way you know make sure like you know your headliner is awesome like turn off your cell phones and blah blah so i'm like doing the hosting thing i'm like hey make sure the bartender's

taken care of yeah one more time for yourselves for coming out here give it up for the give it up for the uh yeah yeah just all these give it up for – so of course I get into my deal and my first joke is kind of like about me being the only black person there. And one guy goes, hi, man. He's black. And it was a mixed dude. What was that guy doing? Was he just like, yeah. Did he feel weird? Like there's one. He didn't like – it wasn't like he just like, yeah. Did he feel weird?

Like, there's one. He didn't like not. It wasn't like he was like, yeah, that's right. I am black. He was just like, I mean, that's what I told you guys, man. Like, what's his name? Jared. You guys ask me every day.

So I had to say something. I think I'm black because my mom said my dad was black. But I haven't seen him in a long time. I don't have a big confirmation 10-4 on that one. He was a comedian, came in town once. Last name was Moffat, I believe. We start crying and holding each other. Crowd's like, yeah.

Okay, so you're alone, pretty much. Yeah, I'm totally alone. I think that that kind of, not that they sympathize with me, but that kind of helped me out. Because they were like, oh, well, he is the only black person. He's pointed it out. I'm not being oblivious to it. Like, hey, let me just start telling jokes. Things like that. You didn't pull a cult cash or whatever.

Yeah. You eased into it. Yeah, eased into it. There were some things that, I mean, a lot of my newer material is starting to get, not controversial, but there's a lot of tension into it. Yeah. Eased into it. There were some things that, like, I mean, a lot of my newer material is starting to get, like, not controversial, but very, there's a lot of tension in it. Where I think, like, if you're from this area, you're so used to those type of conversations, you can deal with it. Like, but there I was like, I'm not going to do anything. Like, I've got a joke where I'm like, you know, I, the joke is, not really a joke, but it's just an observation. I go, I normally kill in front of all white crowds.

Yeah. Which is ironic because my ancestors were killed in front of all white crowds and so i and that usually gets a good laugh like here if it's like this the my uh you're like like oh yeah that was us yeah sorry we're sorry yeah yeah a couple things and then i've got like a couple things about slavery and i'm like well i don't know i just want to don't want to put myself in a position where they feel weird about laughing at it yeah like i'm okay with laughing at it like i you know i think that's why i'm telling that's why you're bringing it up yeah exactly and uh yeah but anyway that was uh it was just i mean i went i got i got through it well i

was excited about it at the end you know and uh it helped being the only black person yeah i would say i mean considering the the the, you handled it really well. I mean, yeah. And that is the whole thing, too, that I'm learning. Like, the hosting muscles are a whole new set of muscles. Like, it's so much easier to go to a show. They're like, all right, now this guy's going to do his eight to ten minutes. You do that.

You can do whatever you want for the most part. You're like, well, and I'm done. But, you know, like the host has to remember the names of everybody you're timing everything and have to be like funny in between yeah you're basically like a camp counselor is what i call it like you're just like and our next activity we're having fun right you know you can't be too dirty up front and all that stuff so yeah well part of me wanted to like while they were talking, like, you know, they were so the way that was set up, like the bar, it wasn't like a great setup for comedy. I mean, what are you serious? Believe it or not, at a bar. Yeah. But there were their chairs in front of us and there were people that were focused.

Yeah. And there was a bar on the right side and there were some people there at the front of the bar that were focused as well. And then there are people at the back that were kind of like yelling and and uh and there was like a dart table there was distractions in the back there was a dart table and they're seriously they're serious about their dart leagues out there apparently no yeah i did a did a show with uh dayla morrison and crofton yeah and uh no that's that there was comedy which was the side show for the dart show that was going on the back just like laser focus just like, you know, wearing like their leather coats and leather vests and shit. And like you have to walk in front of them to get to the bathroom. And they're like looking at you like, you're fucking up my focus here.

Like, dude, I just got to take a piss. Like, okay. It's just darts. Well, good for them. Because I mean, they had something to focus on it. And that's what gets them excited about going out to a bar. Well, I mean, on the dart board was a picture of Obama. So I don't know if it and that's what gets them excited about going out to a bar well i mean on the dartboard was a picture of obama so i don't know if it was that um you know i mean you know at least they you're right they have a hobby they have a hobby you know so right um so yeah and so but there were

people that are focused so the part of me that was like had been hosted and yeah i've been has been hosting and has been to bar shows wanted to be like hey guys can you please like like be quiet but you know and but like i was like those these people right here are focused like they're enjoying it you know so let me just kind of focus on them um but then i'm learning something i'm like well like don't be distracted by these this noise because normally i would have been like hey can you please yeah you know and then then of course like they don't know comedy out there very much so they could have like fired back at me and been like, hey, you're not even funny or whatever. Then now I'm in a situation.

Yeah, yeah. It's much better. Yeah, if they're not being assholes, you have to be like, okay, we're kind of. All right, guys, let's reel it in a little. We're going to have fun. They're like, okay, I guess. Versus like, you guys shut the fuck up. No, you shut the fuck up.

Yeah, you shut up, man. All right, cool. I've been talking about you and the other half black man are gonna we're gonna kick and the other half black guy's like hey uh this is the white side of me that's hanging out tonight yeah i'm nope no thank you no thank you um is that probably the the only type of show you've done like that so far at a uh semi biker bar that was definitely the i mean i've done like that so far at a semi biker bar. That was definitely the, I mean,

I've done, you know, obviously in this area, like done so many bar shows where there are people that are rowdy and not paying attention. And that's to be expected. But like, this was the first show that I've done where it was straight up rednecks and

hillbillies. Hell of nice guys. Hell of nice people. Great people. Yeah. But they just, it wasn't an atmosphere that was conducive to comedy and to and set up for a show because like they're like afterwards they had karaoke you know and nobody was listening to the karaoke like yeah

this is their neighborhood bar that everyone goes to on a friday to get hammered and then like it just happens to be comedy yeah there just happens to be the the the good thing about it though there were tickets on i mean we had pre-sale tickets oh cool and um so there were people that were there even the ones that weren't paying attention had already paid for the show like ah whatever man it gives a shit whatever man there's gonna be comedians here man god damn but we were like you know we were semi semi uh celebrities out there like yeah yeah like dc baltimore wow what's that like man that's cool how'd the rest of the show go went well danny did real well he uh old danny charnley yeah who you were here with last time yes and uh my friend listened to the show and he was like what was that guy's deal he was a dick

and i was like yeah i think danny i don't know what it was, but people that don't know that we were joking around, they thought it was serious. And also, too, every time Danny would laugh, he would hold the mic away. So you'd say something like, man, all right, Danny, you fucking asshole. And then he'd be like. And then it's just dead air. And you're like, don't just like just dead air and you're like don't do that it's a podcast i don't want people to to know my my vulnerability of laughing yeah yeah no one can know i enjoy myself from time to time right yeah and i was like really i didn't even think about that yeah like all right yeah but no he uh he did real well uh it was pretty

impressive because he handled he handled the um like i think you know also a biker bar they want to hear like dirty stuff you know i mean like and so um like his material is very kind of gear it's geared toward that like he started with talking about eating butts you know like and they were like oh yes yeah finally somebody talked finally nothing it doesn't make us think like that black girl yeah, I did a show in Leesburg, Virginia Which I didn't even know existed until I was asked to do a show in Leesburg, Virginia And I was like, yeah, sure, why not? So we did the show and it became very clear that we were just in the way of what normally happens on a Friday night there.

Some of the people were paying attention, but they refused to turn off the TVs. March Madness had just started, so everybody in the back was like, Woo! Blah, blah, blah. You're like, okay. You, like, 25 people that I have paying attention who are all, like, wasted and commenting on everything. And I was joking around with them they were like uh i said something i was like i'm from baltimore and they're like

i was like all right leesburg you're not that fucking cool i don't think hbo ever made a show about you guys and then like uh i said something i was like it's like yeah they wouldn't do like the wire here and i was like you know what would the wire here be like? Hey, man, we got to get to the re-up and get some more wranglers or something. I was like, you guys think you're hot shit because you have a Roy Rogers. And this woman just goes, we have two. It's like, okay, everybody calm the fuck down. What are you, like the mayor or something? And she just would not stop talking about Roy Rogers.

So the show was fun because I had to keep engaging them. It was just like a ton of crowd work to keep their attention shows over they clear out the seats where like there was uh the crowd uh there's crazy lights going off now and it's just a dance party for like middle-aged white people and it was just it was a mess it was like oh this is what you guys were here for you know just like they're listening to like miley cyrus and like ah like making like the eating sign so like oh you guys are like in your 50s what are you doing now when you were doing stand-up out there did you find that like your crowd was mostly them trying to interact with you because they were not used to um i i think it was both i think like the i think they do shows there maybe monthly or not even monthly i think it was both. I think, like, I think they do shows that are maybe monthly or not even monthly.

I think it's pretty sporadic. So when they do happen, it's just kind of like, oh, you know, like, okay. But I think that they were just drunk, too. And I was trying to stop them from, like, talking to each other. I wanted them just to focus on me. Looks like somebody's here. Oh, let's take a break here For the nays man I actually would have been here 15 minutes earlier

If I had gotten through Baltimore quicker Because of the game Yeah, I totally forgot how long it takes to get through Hamden. Because back in the day, Druid Hill was like, you don't want to go to Druid Hill at all. And now everybody wants to be here. They forgot how hard it is to get out here. Well, I came a little earlier because I just left church. And I was going to stop by, hit up a Starbucks.

Okay, so real quick. I love the dichotomy here. You're like, well, I just got out of church and got Starbucks, and I would have been early, too, and Ryan's like, I did Molly for the first time last night. Yeah, I was talking. I was supposed to hang out last night. I was like, no, I'm just going to go home.

And my sister hit me up and was like, yeah, my friend's in town. You've been wanting to meet. And I was like, oh, cool, what's her name? She's like, Molly. No, that's not her name at all. I was just hanging out some friends and they're like lsd they're like hey you know you've how you've done pretty much really bad yeah her name's harrow and her name is uh heroin yeah but uh it was uh it was a hell of a night and i woke up this morning in a strange bed uh oh beside this young lady and i was just like oh god last night must have been fun i don't remember it oh and she's like are you leaving i was like no i don't

have anywhere to go and then i was like but i digress and i was like oh i do have somewhere to go nice yeah i'm really sorry man that sucks well is that church praying for you yeah and uh praying that this podcast is gonna to go well. Yeah. Someone has to. Jesus Christ. Brian, Jesus. So, Molly, guys, am I right? Jeez.

Yeah. Jeez. What is that, Molly? It's pure MDMA? I guess. I was told, I was asked if I've ever done ecstasy. And I was like, yeah, I used to dabble in it when I was younger. And they're like, it's just like that, but better.

I was like, you sold. Yeah. Yeah, I was like, yeah, I used to dabble in it when I was younger. And they're like, it's just like that but better. I was like, you sold. Yeah. Yeah, I was sold. But no, I had to put it in a – it was too much work to do any drug. I had to put it in a tissue in what they call parachuted apparently. And I ate a tissue full of powder. Why? So like time release?

I think so it doesn't instantly hit you because it's pretty powerful. But it's ridiculous. Okay. But you're not apparently supposed to drink on it and i was drinking drinking heavily before i took it that's that's usually with any bad decision with drugs you're already drunk and you're like who cares yeah who cares like hey uh if i wasn't drinking i wouldn't do this exactly hello i'm not a bad person otherwise let's do it yeah now what does it make you feel like? It was pretty euphoric, you know? And then we made our own dance.

It's funny. In Frederick, Maryland, where I was last night, there's this very nice restaurant called Isabella's. And you're there all day eating tapas and great food. And then at 11 p.m., I guess they decide, fuck whoever else is eating here. This is a dance party right now and it's so funny we're just dance club we're just talking about that that seems to be a thing at restaurants they're like all right all right white people you want a dance party fine yeah exactly and so um yeah we went there the bon jovi yeah i mean what else do you do when you're

on on a designer drug like that you dance right like cocaine ecstasy i believe that's what you're supposed to do is dance and forget about your your problems yeah sure sure um now i just watched hannibal burris's special and he's like he was making fun all the rappers said like i'm on that molly yeah and he's like you can't really say it like that like it's this euphoric thing like man i just masturbated to the color blue i'm on that molly. I'm on that molly. Yeah. It's definitely not something where you at all think that you're hard for two seconds. Well, you don't think that you're tough at all. At all. And it was fun.

I mean, I'll probably never do it again, but it was fun. I'm too old for that stuff, guys. Too old. Even though I did recently, like a month, two months ago, do some acid. I did some acid. Ryan's like, I shot heroin in my eye. Yeah, I shot heroin. I was like, well, two months ago, do some acid. I did some acid. Ryan's like, I shot heroin in my eyeball. Yeah, I shot heroin. I was like, there's a first time for everything.

I was like, what's the best way? They're like, your eyeball. That's funny that you mentioned that because when I was at church this morning, there was a former acid dealer and we prayed for that person. I was going to say, acid is one drug you don't have to pray for. People just grow out of it. People are like, hey, I've gotten older. Probably should move on. But no, but somebody talked me into that also.

It's like, hey, it's a great reset. I was really stressed out working comedy and working 60 hours a week and then doing comedy three times a night. And he's like, hey, you need to reset, man. I was like, I do need to reset. I thought he was just like. Such drug dude talk. Yeah, it really is. Bro, man, you got to get back to even with the universe, man. Yeah was like, I do need to reset. I thought he was just like... Such drug dude talking. Bro, man, you gotta get back

to even with the universe, man. Exactly. It's like a car salesman, but it's so much easier. You're right. I do. I need to reset. What can I do to get some Molly in here today, sir? Yeah. And so I went to...

I took it, and I was... It was this night where I thought I was gonna be at home by myself, and I had to take care of my grandfather. So I'm on acid and telling my grandfather all these bits, and he's just laughing at me. He's like, these are so dumb. He's like, a horse and a pig would never do that. I'm telling him these jokes that I'm trying to think of on the spot. I was like, acid's great.

I'm going to have a whole hour tomorrow. Oh, no. And I woke up and looked at this pad where I wrote all these jokes down. It was so awful. Someone was looking into other universes and stuff. But it was fun. You motherfuckers heard about this Andromeda? What's with Andromeda Galaxy?

I was like, guys, come on. String theory. Am I right? Come on. So have you reset? It felt good. I actually felt like when I started coming down, I called my ex-girlfriend. I was like, hey, I'm really sorry.

I realized tonight that I'm a total sociopath because I should be really anxiety-ridden on acid. And right now I don't care about anything. I should have bigger issues in my life where I cannot do acids, like worrying about kids or a real job. I'm worried about my set the next night at Sidebar, which doesn't matter for anybody but me. Yeah, that is funny, like how much you weigh against doing a set. Like, I did a set on Friday night at Super Comedy. And when I was leaving, there was a dumpster that was like sticking out just beyond the curb. And as I was leaving, I was backing up and I just bumped into

the trash can and it kind of scratched my car. I was like, well, still had a good set. But if you had a bad set, it would have been even worse. Of course that happened. The universe is telling me I shouldn't do this anymore. It's kind of weird though. I feel like either way,

you're going to think about it all night. Even if you have a great set, you're going to think about, okay, I can add this tag here, or I forgot this. And then you have a bad set. It's like everything has to go. Everything about that set was wrong. In my head, anyway, it's always my fault. It's never the crowd.

It's something I did. I mean, unless you're in a West Virginia biker bar. How was that? It was cool yeah it was it's like it's like um i don't know if it was uh chris rock or um richard prior that said they all look the same am i right fellas well sometimes it is the crowd like you know um like if chris rock can't just go to a white supremacist meeting and start spitting off his jokes and it's gonna get huge laughs no it is that for that particular situation it's the crowd yeah so how was the crowd they were good

um hey ryan show up on time next time oh you're talking about all of this no okay okay apparently it was great they were it was just uh it was hillbillies and rednecks great people yeah great people um but just the you know you know how bar shows can be. Sure. Like it wasn't, they didn't, the host didn't settle them down and kind of get them ready for comedy. And he was also a semi-professional wrestler. Oh, really? Yeah. He just kind of went on stage and just started talking.

No, like, hey, guys, by the way, my name is this. I'm a wrestler. He was just like. You should have given him some African wrestling name. Like, bring me up as your wrestling name Like bring me up as Your actual name Bring me up as Mandingo Mandingo

The Mad Mandingo The Mad Mandingo Chokeslinger Yeah Yeah that's cool You're right And it's also Reading the crowd too

Is what I'm starting to learn And like we were at a show A couple weeks ago At a great place At the auto bar I mean Shit shows Oh yeah

It was a great show Yeah yeah And I was super excited To be on But Taquan on before me And we both have A lot of racial stuff couple weeks ago at a great place at the auto bar i mean shit shows oh yeah great show yeah yeah i'm super excited to be on but talk went on before me and he and i we both have a lot of racial stuff that we do in our in our uh i don't want to say acts in our sets and uh he he did his racial stuff and it didn't work and my cat and my cockiness i'm like well his stuff didn't work my stuff's gonna kill and of course it didn't black guy can't handle the't handle the racial... Let the white man. Let the white guy test this out. I mean... By the way, you saw my partner up there earlier? He didn't talk about black

people enough. Here's the thing about blacks, alright? I don't even say people afterwards. I just call them the color. Yeah. Blacks. That's one thing I know about the Negro. The Negro race. And it started off so well. I was like, alright. They weren't ready for this racial stuff.

And then it just did not work. I was like, oh, yeah, I should have just tailored my set. That's the privilege of going on later. You should have took all that stuff out. But everything is always so good because it's like, well, now I know. You know what I mean? Because otherwise, I know sometimes we can get discouraged. You're like, oh, man, that didn't work.

But that's so good for us. Yeah. I mean, that is the shitty part, too, is that bombing or not doing well is just a part of it. I think every comedian knows that, but nobody wants to go through it, especially in front of other comedians. But they get it, too. As long as you're not lying to yourself like, man, killed it. Another killer show. There are people that do that too and i'm too nice like there's a lot of people like no you didn't and i just don't like keep

keep doing it but the last podcast uh that we did um did with alex and dan from chuckle storm and alex was kind of busting my balls a little bit about saying like good set too much and like i think i think that's good like if you can say like hey man good set anybody that gets up there and like they're actually trying, I respect it. But if they're like, good set, and they're like, I don't know, then you can give some feedback. But I don't like the people that, like, I saw this the other day. A comedian got off stage. Another comedian comes up to me.

He's like, yeah, that piece just isn't working. It's like, he didn't ask you. Yeah, exactly. Unsolicited. Unsolicited, yeah. piece just isn't working it's like he didn't ask you you know like yeah yeah i i don't mind if it comes from somebody that i actually know and respect you know then then they know at least my voice or where i'm where my voice is going yeah i feel like i found my voice yet but i respect it like if someone like mike finnaza comes like hey man that's not you but i respect that like you're right you know right right yeah yeah um but, yeah, I feel like I do. Sean's voice does this as a joke, and I'm starting to do that with people I actually, like, truly love.

I'm like, hey, did you go up tonight? And they're like, yeah. I was like, oh, good set, man. Good set. And I love it. And it's like I'll do that to talk or something, but I would never do that to a comedian. No, yeah. That's definitely happened to me.

Happened to me in D.C. with comedian John Conroy. I went up second at the show, and he was going up later. And I was like, hey, man, you getting ready to go? He's like, yeah, I think I'm up with a couple people. He's like, you go up? I was like, yeah. I was up second. And he's like, oh, good set.

Thanks, man. Must have been. It must have been. Amanda, that's Ryan and Tak. Hi. Hey, man. Must have been. It must have been. Amanda, that's Ryan and Toc. Hi. Hey, Jorge. My girlfriend's real for those listening. Yeah, she's totally real.

You guys saw her. When I first got here, he's like, yeah, she's in this room with the closed door. No noise coming out, but she's there. Let's say hi to her. No, no, no, no. Don't bother, guys. I'm just pulling an elaborate system of strings. Yeah, it's like Weekend at Bernie's Hold on a second

Let me run downstairs It's like a It's a voice message Hey, Josh Just missing your big cock I'm like, oh, that's my girl, everybody How come she's said that ten times since we've been here? Big cock, big

Okay, honey, we get it Oh, I Speaking of that, I did that 10 times since we've been here okay honey we get it oh i um i speaking that i did uh hosting at mcgoobies did that and that was super fun um at the end of the weekend i was going to get paid and i go into andrew's office and there's a waitress last weekend yeah yeah there's a waitress there and uh she's talking to andrew andrew's the owner of mcgoobies for those listening uh waitress is sitting there i guess she's sorting out money with him and uh i'm like hey i just want to just grab my check and he's like okay there's a waitress she goes uh i meanwhile i haven't said a word to her i've been there thursday through saturday five shows total this is the first time i talked to her and she goes can i ask you something and i I was like, yeah, yeah, sure.

Absolutely. I thought she was going to be like, hey, thanks for saying, like, give it up for the wait staff or something. And she just goes, you wear those pants just for performances or what? Performance pants. And I was like, no. I mean, I guess, you know, every day is a performance because I wear them pretty much, you know, every day. And she was like, okay. Because I was talking to the other girls. We think you wear them just to emphasize your cock.

Good selling point in comedy. Then Andrew goes, you got a big cock? What's happening? I just want to get paid. First of all, no. She just kept going. She's like, yeah, because the way that you stand. She put her hand on her hip and jutted it out like I was like Boy George.

I don't stand like that. It was so weird. I'm going to take these notes. I'm going to start wearing tight pants too. The thing is, I do not have a big cock. I mean, my girlfriend seems to think so, and God bless her. He's lying. He has no pants on right now.

I wouldn't say big. It's definitely above average. I have a microphone on my cock. It looks like a't say big. It's definitely above average. I have a microphone on my cock. It looks like a microphone, actually. It's weird. It's got an off-on switch. Very porous. It's like the top of a mic.

It's a mesh head. Yeah, it's a mesh head. That's kind of weird. I piss everywhere. It's a goddamn mess. You have to sit down. It's okay. When I first started doing comedy, I truly thought it didn't matter what you wore.

I want to be comfortable on stage. And the first time I did McGuby's, the competition there, and I remember somebody that worked there was like, hey, man, you really shouldn't wear shorts. I was like, why? He's like, first of all, you're way higher than everybody else. If they get the right look, if you get to the right part of the stage, they can definitely see up your shorts.

I was like, that makes a lot of sense. And I've always wore jeans on stage from now on. And then I heard, too, you should probably wear a blank shirt, something with no design on it. Yeah, I got that. When I first started doing improv, they're like, you shouldn't have logos and shit on your shirt. Cut to me Wednesday night hosting Coco Lane with Mike Myers on my shirt. Kim Ambrose comes up to me and she's like, do you know how hard it is to listen to you tell jokes when you have a serial killer on your shirt? And I was like, oh, yeah, that kind of makes sense.

Yeah, I started doing that, too. I was just wearing blank shirts or whatever. Or even if I want to dress it up a little bit, maybe wear a zip-up and a t-shirt just so people are not distracted. I just wear a shirt. They're going to be distracted by my muscles anyway. There's that too. I have a similar thing. I say, look at my cock muscle.

That's what it says on my shirt. And then it says real small print, hard to miss in these pants. And these tight pants. By the way, these are petite. Zero waste. These are Lady Capris. They fit me perfectly. And I. These are Lady Capris. Lady Capris.

They fit me perfectly. And I'm sponsored by Lady Capris. There's a cock pocket in it, too. Made for a woman. Strong enough for a man. I don't know. We'll figure it out. Enough support for a man.

Yeah. Enough cock support. Yeah. I like your pictures up here. Oh, thanks, man. Yeah. Are these comedians that have been in here? For those listening, we're in the Dig Sesh HQ

and yeah, these are people that have been on the show. I like it. We have a bunch of pictures of past guests. Love it. Yeah, Amanda,

my girlfriend, again, real. She did this kind of setup. That's awesome. Maybe one day you guys will be on the wall. We'll have people

that show up on time and people that show up late because they're doing Molly all night. Oh, man. It really is an all night thing, guys. If you're going up late because they're doing Molly all night. Oh, man. You know? It really is an all-night thing, guys. If you're going to do Molly, listeners, it's all night.

Well, I'm going to pray that I can do this. Well, and hopefully. That's why Toc and I are in a group together. He prays for me. Uh-huh. And he does the drugs for me. And I do the drugs for him. Works out well.

You guys are a good combo. Oh, Toc's dabbled. I've smoked pot with Toc before. Oh. Randomly. It's random. He won't do it all the time. I'm going to put it on here. Oh, Toc's dabbled. I've smoked pot with Toc before. Oh! Randomly. It's random. He won't do it all the time. I'm going to put it on here.

Oh, boy. It doesn't happen often. Shots fired. When it does. Toc, what do you have to say to that? Or do you not have a response because you're too stoned? He is so stoned. Well, I'm going to pray that this doesn't make it onto the...

No, Toc's a pretty straight-laced guy. Honestly, that's always been one of my heels is booze and pot. I don't come on here and say, I'm late because I was doing Molly, but usually it's just booze and pot, and that's good. It was funny when I first started. Sometimes you got to switch it up a little bit, man. Sometimes you got to get heavy is what it is.

Sometimes you have to wake up beside random people and be like, I'm late for something very important. You've got to set the speedometer back to zero. I'm sold. What do you got, man? What do you got? Black tar heroin. All right.

So we're going to get this started. Thanks for having us on, man. I really appreciate it. Okay. That was a good warm-up. Let's get the podcast going, guys. Ben Ghazi, what's up? Oh, man.

What's up? Ben Ghazi. We didn't get to ask you this. Why do you do up? Oh, man What's up? Benghazi We didn't get to ask you this Why do you do this? Oh, the podcast? Mostly, you know, I'm a lonely, lonely man So this doesn't go anywhere You just listen to this at night

Well, Mike and I started the podcast And it was mostly like Mike and I could hang out And we recorded But I work in a cubicle So all I do is listen to podcasts And I was like, you know what? I could start my own goddamn podcast. And so far, it's been fun.

And it's a cool way to get to know other comedians, too. Like, if I was like, hey, Ryan, you want to tell me about your life and just come over? You'd be like, eh. I was like, but what if we record it for strangers? You'd be like, okay, yeah. Sure, sure. Let's do that. Yeah, I drive around all day and listen to podcasts.

Actually, that's, I think, helped me start doing comedy. Yeah, that was a big part of it. And then hearing stories. I like all the inside baseball talk and all that shit. Yeah, I love it. But beyond that, too, you've got to get content out there, guys. Content, content, content. Right.

That said, this is the end of the podcast. How long have you guys been We've been doing it for about I think it'll be three years this summer We've tried to put out an episode every week But, you know, get busy and all that stuff Podcasts, it's a pain in the dick Like, I mean, just scheduling wise

You guys know, we've been trying to work this out For 17 years Before I even knew what podcasts were. But, yeah, so you've got to record it and then editing later. It's not a lot of editing, but you want to make sure the sound quality is decent, record an intro and all that stuff. And then it has to upload, and that takes time. What are the – if you had to give a podcast to your listeners, a couple that you listen to? Oh, oh, oh.

I'm a big fan of The Champs as of late. You guys listen to that? Neil Brennan and Moshe Kasher. I was a big fan of You Made It Weird, which is strong. If you've got a good four hours to kill, yeah. I like Pete Holmes. Yeah, I know. Whenever they say it on

podcasts, like, is anybody listening? Two hours in, I'm like, yeah, dog. I'm here for nine hours. You could do a nine-hour podcast.'t care exactly you'll listen yeah um the crab feast is really great too i like that a lot i've never heard i've never heard that's a comic uh ryan sickler is uh he's a comedian in uh la but he was from baltimore so it's cool he talks about baltimore a lot cool and uh jay larson but other than that i mean it's cool. He talks about Baltimore a lot. Cool. And Jay Larson. But other than that, I mean, it's no fucking digression sessions. Am I right? Yeah.

People, am I right? Great name, too. Woo! I can't believe you got my singing voice. I can't believe I sang. I promised I wasn't going to. That was you on Molly, man. You were just centered.

That was me last night, honestly. That was me last night. You were in touch with the heavens. I'm already at a seven, usually. Oh, yeah. I always try to talk to everybody. But last night, I ran the club I was in last night. I was like, you guys need seats?

You should be dancing. I was all over the place last night. You're like, can we talk about payroll for a second? Come to my office. And I actually got Molly to sponsor this podcast. It's good news. Great news. Thank you.

Brought to you by Molly. Molly. You can slip it in your drink. Molly. Smile more. Molly. Okay, so you guys, we talked about it a little bit in the intro, but you guys are a duo as well. You guys are a little bit of a team hosting shows in Frederick, right?

Frederick, Maryland. So how did you fellas meet? We met through doing comedy. Uh-huh. And you were like, like hey you do racial stuff i do racial stuff you go to church anyway let's uh but we actually we we probably met i want to say uh almost around this time last year i would say maybe may or june oh okay so it hasn't been that long uh yeah we've been actually well it's gonna be a year soon that we've we've been

doing uh yeah comedy yeah yeah so it was it was before that's about almost too i don't know it Well, it's going to be a year soon that we've been doing Wreckham comedy. Yeah. Yeah. So it was before that. It's about almost two. I don't know. It was some time in the past. I know that. It was some time in the past. Yeah.

But we met through what was Key City comedy, which was Toc and Alex Starr and Patrick Withrow. Oh, okay. And since I'm from Frederick, they were doing shows in Frederick. And the first couple shows that I did with them, I was still pretty green. I mean, I still am pretty green.

But we... I brought out a lot of people to the shows. And then eventually it came to the point where I was helping them promote the shows. And then I became part of Key City

and that didn't work out. And me and Toc, we were the same age. We were almost exactly the same age. So we were like, hey, let's just... How old are you guys? 20.

I didn't think he was going to ask. I'm 34. I think Toc's 34 also. We're older. Look how young he looks. Black don't crack. I tell people I'm 34 and that's why they think I'm so mature. Really 21. Anywho. I'm a 21 year old. You, 21. All right. Anyhoo. I'm a 21-year-old.

Hey, you got the soul of a 34-year-old. Old soul. Yeah, very old soul. But I think what it came down to is just that we both had the same ideas on how to promote the shows. Yeah, you guys do a great job. I was waxing tox balls earlier about Cellar Door and Frederick. Which you killed at last time. Oh, thank you.

Like, destroyed. Thank you, man. The whole show. That's one of those shows. Ran the light by eight minutes. But, hey, you know what? When it comes to the guy that's hosting the Goobies next week, he'll have eight extra minutes. Hey, come on.

No, but really, it was all around one of those shows where it's like, as promoters, you can sit back and be like, thank God. We can just sit here and watch this. And the crowd's great. They're into it. Yeah, top to bottom. That was a killer show. That's when you bust out the molly. And it was like, time to relax.

Everybody relax. Yeah. No, but that was all around just an amazing show. Yeah. Yeah, it's a really cool spot. So anybody in the Frederick area, go check out those shows on Sunday nights. Yeah, so we've been doing this for, yeah, going on a year for doing the shows at Cellar Door. So anybody in the Frederick area, go check out those shows on Sunday nights. We've been going on a year for doing the shows at Cellar Door,

and we have that showcase where we've got national and touring headliners and things like that. We put up local people, of course, and up-and-coming folks. That's biweekly. And then we're starting today as our first show. We're having a booked open mic um and that's starting today so it's a little different format but we're still our focus and our i'd say money maker and our our big draw is our our uh our sunday showcase so yeah we also have an open mic we started off at uh at this place called church street pub uh-huh and uh that

was on tuesdays and then that place closed down because the only business they were getting was on tuesdays yeah so now we're at this place called um guidos speak easy guido frederick which is it's cool and it's it's gonna it's one of those things where it's in the growth mode like we gotta just yeah like you just you know yeah i mean it's it's an open mic yeah it's an open mic so it's you know it takes time. I'm always surprised when people show up to open mics that don't do comedy. Yeah, yeah. Like, let's see these guys kind of fail. It's funny, too, because the way it's set up at Guido's,

the bar in the back room is where we do the comedy, and the regulars will come back and watch one set and be like, yeah, we watched the comedy show tonight. It's like, no, come back and see a couple people at least. Don't just watch one guy do one joke. He's like, oh, that was funny. Let's leave now. Yeah, just peek their head in.

Okay, I get it. Mike Black's doing something with a construction paper. Oops. I get it. I get it. Yes, that did happen last week. Yeah. So, yeah, definitely check that out.

So for you guys, I think it's really cool that there are people that are putting together shows. Like around here, for those listening, there was Color Me Funny. We had a bunch of those guys on. So it was like six comedians. And it was a lot of work. They were hosting different rooms and all that stuff. So it's cool that you guys host shows and give people opportunities. That said, you guys are fucking faggots.

By the way, get the fuck out of my house. It's good because, and Ryan and I always talk about this, is that some part of it is stressful for us because we're like, man, now we're in that position where we have to make sure everything's all right and make sure the crowd's enjoying themselves, make sure the comedians are taking care of everything. And then we've got these two shows, the Sunday show, The Cellar, and of course we've got our open mic,

and then we've got um our open mic and then we've got a show that that could be coming up here shortly in um in baltimore but it's it's stressful from the point that we've got to bring people in we got to you know put up the list but it's a good problem to have yeah yeah yeah it's kind of like yeah we got a lot of there's work that we got to do we got to promote we got to make sure posters are put together and you know so on and so forth but like definitely yeah it's like it's like yeah because normally like we would just go to we go to a lot of spots and we just like, everything's already taken care of.

And you're like, Oh man, like you worry about performing. That's it. Yeah. So like we think about all these factors and yeah, that brings in a lot of stress, but it's also like,

we're learning so much from it and, and we're also getting a good reputation for it if we're putting on quality, you know what I mean? So, and, and that's helped us out a lot too with opportunities. Yeah. Same,

same way with the podcast. It's cheating, getting to know people. It's like, well, they with opportunities. Yeah, same way with the podcast. It's cheating getting to know people. It's like, well, they're here, so they've got to hang. Come on our show now. Yeah, exactly. It works out. And also, that is the weird part about it to me, especially when one of us is hosting. You have to worry about performing, but you also have to worry about, is the crowd there? That's your responsibility, too.

The comedian's taken care of. But like Toc said, it's a good problem to have. It's definitely not, you know, a bad thing. Well, yeah, you guys are fucking doing great. So keep that shit up. So, yeah. What do you guys think you're going to be in Maryland for a while? Do you have plans of like moving to New York or anything or trying it?

At some point, I want to move somewhere different. I think this is a great place to cut your teeth with comedy. I mean, D.C. is not far. Yeah, I was going to say, being so close to D.C. Yeah, and Palmer's becoming a great place to do comedy, especially open mics. I mean, Monday nights you can hit three rooms. Yeah. You used to have to drive to D.C. to do something like that.

Yeah, that's true. It's definitely fun. Yeah. But, yeah, I mean, at some point that's the plan to move to New York. Yeah, I'm trying at some point that's the plan to move to New York. Yeah. I'm trying to think, too. Like, I've just lived in Maryland my whole life, and now I'm like, ugh. I love Maryland.

I generally love Maryland. I could have been born in Hawaii, and I don't want to be like, I don't want to spend my whole life in Hawaii. Yeah, exactly. Like, it's just wherever you grow up. Exactly. But, you know, it doesn't mean I won't come back or anything. But, you know. Yeah, I don't know.

Chicago, Austin. Chicago's really good. I don't know. I you know. Yeah, I don't know. Chicago, Austin. Chicago's really good. I don't know. I'm thinking. Thinking, I don't know. Thinking, yeah. I was thinking, I say this to people and they look at me like I'm an idiot. Oakland.

Oakland. Uh-huh. Great drugs, okay? It's pretty much. Molly Galore. Molly Galore. Molly Central. Okay.

And it's pretty much the Balmore of the West Coast. And San Francisco is right there. Actually, yeah. I hear Oakland's kind of like Brooklyn now as to New York. There you go. I mean, there's a bunch of white people making it better. Right, Toc? Am I right?

Am I right? No, but yeah. It was so cheap to live there. A bunch of artistic people moved there. Sure. Trying to get that going. Artistic means white. A bunch of artists

and people that are movers and shakers. Red, white. You know, the money people. Of all walks of life, white people. White people. Oh, yeah. How about you, Tuck?

Yeah, I mean, I've got plans. I love stand-up, and I've started to get into improv. Ultimately, I'd like to be a writer and actor. Yeah. And I'm huge on, I love sketch comedy. Yeah. And I love rom-com, too. Typical black guy. Always into like rom-com too yeah but like acting typical black guy always into the rom-com i'd love to be on tyler perry no um it's probably an easy way to get it hey tyler like

listen no but uh yeah uh like you know again starting to do improv and and wanting to take more and progress in that and also press and acting like yeah i totally love chicago because it's it's stand-up scene is tremendous. The improv scene is tremendous. And I could totally see myself being there. And I love the city in general. It's just a cool city. And I love, you know.

That was probably my first choice. That's what I'm kind of thinking too. I just went out there for the Chicago Improv Festival. And after we performed, it's the first time I've ever gotten us doing improv. These people are like, thank you. Thank you for performing. That's awesome. It's like, okay.

Most people are like, hey, good show. They're like, improv, okay. But they're like, it's an improv town, which is so weird. That's a lot of the stand-ups that are coming up right now or getting their dues right now are from Chicago. T.J. Miller, Camille Nanjani. Yeah, Pete Holmes was out there.

Yeah, Chicago, it was a cool spot, man. I enjoyed it. They're really supportive of, like, I've met a few stand-up comedians from Chicago. It's a really supportive atmosphere out there. Yeah. And people, I mean, not that it's not like that out here, but it's like they're even more so, and they're're a big city and they have tons of people that are really really

good that are still like hey man like yeah we're all coming up and we're all doing well yeah that is that is the weird thing too like once like the smaller cities like uh baltimore dc like people are starting to get good then they leave and it's like oh if you would just stay we could have an awesome thing too but i guess industry like you know yeah nobody's coming to baltimore yeah yeah exactly yet yeah and i think if that scene is built enough where people are like hey well these there are a lot of people that are good coming out of baltimore and dc like we need we have to go there because then we'll find somebody and we'll be the ones that get the credit for being like hey i brought this guy to new york i brought this guy to la because he's from a small town so yeah that's a good point.

Yeah, that is a scary thing too because there's other comedians that we all know that have gone to New York and they come back and they just have that thousand yard stare and you're like, how is it?

They're like, it's hard. A lot different. Yeah, because I mean any town you go to it's just like, oh, you're funny? So is fucking everybody else.

So is everybody else. Back of the line. It's starting over again basically. Yep. Because right now you can go out to a scene and be like, the other night at Coca-Lane that was an amazing lineup. fucking everybody else. Everybody else. Back of the line. Yeah. It's starting over again, basically. Yep. Yep. Cause right now you can go out to the scene and be like, like the other night at Coca Lane, that was an amazing lineup.

Yeah. Funny people. Yeah. Yeah. Great job hosting. Oh, thank you. I appreciate it.

That was, that place is, is, is in my opinion, the best open mic there is. Yeah. It's so weird. Yeah.

Everybody's just like, like before the show starts, there's like six people there. And then when the show starts, it's packed and everybody's on board. And it's a racial crowd. I mean, it's, it's a six people there. And then when the show starts, it's packed. It's packed. And everybody's on board. And it's a racial crowd. I mean, it's a mixed crowd. You've got college kids.

You've got older people. I mean, it's a good mixed crowd. Yeah. Yeah, that was a lot of fun. But, again, I was looking at the lineup, and it's just like all these people are talented. And they're all from Baltimore. Like it's not like we had – well, you're from Maryland. They're all from Maryland.

Yeah, so it was – but you go to New York, it's like, yeah, multiply that by 1,000. And that's what you have. Well, the good thing is that, like, if you – again, if you're able to develop yourself here, now you're in a different position, like, going to Baltimore or going to New York or going to Chicago or LA. Because now you're, like, in a business where I'm actually good. And now people are seeing you, and they don't know where you're at in your true in your development they don't know if like you're just getting started yeah um who was it uh it was a kumail uh nanjani said that when he was in chicago and he moved over to new york and he had like 20 minutes of of solid yeah materials or something like that yeah he had a lot

of he had a lot of uh material and so he would go he would hit up open mics like you know multiple open mics a night and do different sets yeah so here are these same people seeing him and being like dang this dude is freaking soft so now he his opportunities were multiplying they were like hey you need to come out to this and he was like he'd been doing it comedy yeah and in chicago for five years or something like that and uh but he came out there and like people are like damn this guy is really good because i'd never seen him yeah yeah so like the new guy the new guy is so good and that's the best part because you know when you go on the stage of is really good because they've never seen him. Yeah. So they're like, oh, the new guy. The new guy is so good. And that's the best part because you know when you go on the stage of Mike Newark,

you're like, I've never seen this guy before. He's going to be so awful. Yeah. And then if you have a five-minute set that kills you, you're like, oh, wow. And they have to remember you after that because you're the competition. Yeah. Well, yeah, I've performed in Chicago. And again, it's like when people don't know you, like it's just like anything else.

Like they don't know you. They're like, oh, I wonder what his deal is about. And I remember like I signed up for an open mic. I signed up on the list and, you know, go up and just told the guy I'm from D.C. He knew it was my first time here. And he was like, oh, it's first time here. And I talk Moffat and I go up there, had a good set. And like afterwards, he was like, oh, man, like, are you from here?

What are you doing in Chicago? And I told him the situation. He was like, man, yeah, he's definitely, oh, man, like, are you from here? What are you doing in Chicago? And I told him the situation. He was like, man, yeah, he's definitely come back, man. He was like, no, I had a really good set, and so I made it appear that, like, how long you've been doing this stuff and everything. You're just like, it's my first time, bro. Yeah, first time here. I just wanted to try it. I'm actually a poet.

Yeah. I do poetic poetry. Yeah, that's my passion. Yeah. And so Probably won't do this again But hey Have fun With your jokey jokes

Yeah Have fun doing this I'll be working on sonnets pal Did it go well The first time you went up Did you feel In Chicago No first time you ever went up

Like I'm gonna tell jokes For the first time No No Very embarrassing I actually thought There's not too many people I've talked to

Robert Andrew That's the only person I know. Really? Dude, he beat me in McGooby's competition. Well, he also brought 37 people, but he also, he had generally, like, had a good set, and it was the first time ever doing stand-up. Really? Yeah.

Holy shit. He did real well. But he's just naturally funny. It's funny, though. It's very, very funny. I mean, yeah. So, you know, my first time was it was embarrassing it was i i didn't think i i didn't think i was going to like go up anymore like after that like i i i was thinking about like

what my plan was i was like man i either need to write more material i definitely need to i mean i still do now i need i'm like very you know i've got a lot of things I need to develop work on. But the first time I got heckled too. Yeah. I got heckled because I took a drink of, I did that old, that whole deal where you, you bring your set list up, you put it on a napkin, you write your set list on a napkin, you have a glass of water. It's something I read, like some bullshit I read. It works.

It works for some people. It didn't work for me that night. And so I put it on a napkin had a glass of water and had it on the stool and so what I would do is I would drink my water look at my set list which was like four jokes or something like that and so I remember I went over and I picked up this water I had a drink of water I was like take a sip of water and I said before I did I go I'm just gonna have a little sip of water. And this woman goes, you do that. Wow.

You got heckled by sipping water. Like, you got heckled drinking water. Well, she saw me. She saw it because I had done it like a couple times before. But I had no comeback for it. I was just like, all right. Well, getting back into these awful jokes. No, you do something.

You eat your burrito. Why don't you support The establishment You Bitch I think the first Four times I tried to do

Get up in front of a crowd And tell jokes Were at true open mics Like so The first time The guy was like Man we never get any And we never get anybody

Out here doing jokes That's so awesome And in my head I was like Oh so you mean It's like music It was like Music we never get any community like and we never get anybody out here doing jokes that's so awesome yeah and my head i was like you mean it's like music it was like music poetry and it was a variety of stuff it was a bar in columbia and uh so i'm like oh you never get comics out here this is they're gonna love this like it's gonna be a treat for them and then i get he gets he opens the show up and he's playing a song and it's like the uh a cover of uh and it really well done cover of of Red Hot Chili Peppers under the bridge. I was like, oh, and nobody's paying attention.

Everybody's talking. It's like, oh, this is going to be god-awful. And the only part they paid attention, I thought it was going to be a one-liner comic when I first started, not realizing that my whole life I've been telling stories to make people laugh. So I get up there and tell this joke. Something about Motor Razr is false advertisement because it doesn't cut cocaine for shit. And this woman just heard cocaine. She's like, that killed

my brother and this is such a disgusting drug. And I was like, oh, God. And I was like, okay. Well, sorry about your brother. How about this one? Well, it killed my set, too. Yeah, thank you. That's my time. And then after like four of those, I was like, maybe I should actually look for only comedic open mics. Yeah.

That would probably help out a lot. Yeah, most of the time when there's, like, comedy and music mixed and other shit, it doesn't go well. It's, yeah. How about you, Josh? Oh, first time, it just killed. It was this little place. It was at the Improv. Yeah, yeah.

A little place called Magoobies. That's going well. Madison Square Garden? You guys heard of it? Madison Square Garden. I played there once. The first time I went up, Mike Stork, another local comedian around here, but

he tours all over Canada and stuff. He was hosting an open mic at a pizza place called Joe Squared. And my partner on this podcast, who's not here, I mean, you know, hey, say what you will. Oh, he's the guy I woke up next to in bed this morning. Well, where is he? You guys got a car pulled.

He did too much Molly. That's the problem. Mike, 11 years of sobriety. He did so much Molly. It's Molly Ringwald. He's out. He's out. It's Molly Ringwald.

His hair's red now. He's... 11 years of sobriety down the drain. I guess it was worth it, though. Yeah, it was so much Molly. It's Molly Ringwald. He's out. He's out. It's Molly Ringwald. His hair's red now. He's... 11 years of sobriety down the drain. I guess it was worth it, though. Yeah, it was so worth it. But Mike, he was doing stand-up. And I think... I don't even know if I was taking improv classes at the time.

I might have been. But he's like, yeah, just go up. And I was like, oh, all right. So I go to... And I have tons of notes written. Basically, entire bits written out. all right so i go to and i have like tons of notes like written like basically like entire bits like written out and um uh we told mike stork and i went there with another friend of mine it was his first time as well and uh he's like is your guys first time because he probably

saw we're like nervous as hell and he's like yeah and he's like all right well yeah it's it's it's okay man like um you're just gonna get four minutes and then um, and then I'll light you around three or somewhere around there. That just kind of means wrap it up. And I was like, four minutes? What are you, fucking crazy? Four minutes? That's like an eternity. And so I'm up there for seven minutes total.

He never gave me the light. And so my strategy was I'm just going to keep talking and talking and talking. Because if i stop talking there should be laughter there if there's not laughter there yeah it's over but if i keep talking if i keep talking they won't know there's supposed to be laughter so like it got like little bits of laughs in there but i was just like and then um my dog is a dog and anyway you know just like it was like really yeah not not good I have video of it somewhere, but yeah. And that's what's funny too is like the first couple times you get chuckles and then certain stuff starts to work.

But then that one time where I got on stage and everything I had thought of or like wrote true stuff down and made like punchlines and everything I wanted to work worked. Yeah. That's when I was hooked forever. Everything I wanted to work worked. Yeah. And that's when I was hooked forever. Like, I knew I would never stop. Right, right. Like, I want that feeling every time. When you get that set where it's just like, I guess you could say you killed. Uh-huh.

Oh, God, that's the drug. That's what you want. Yeah, it was definitely a few months. I think I went to Sidebar a couple times and then did other stuff. But, yeah, I started i started like tweeting a bunch and then i would have jokes that were just kind of like one-liners and then i would try to like build around that so then i did an open mic where i had a bunch of tweets that like got like one or two favorites and i was like these are gold so then i did those and then that went a lot. But I was basically kind of doing like a character a little bit,

just kind of like a depressed guy. Yeah, which, you know, just my real-life character. Well, you're a golden star now. What does it matter? You're a golden star. I'm a golden god now. But no, yeah, when you first start, it's awful, pretty awful. I remember I sent a video to my dad.

I was like, check it out. He was like, yeah, good for you. Yeah, good for you. You got up there, buddy. Is something wrong? Who is this? Don't contact me. My first, I cannot watch my first performance.

You recorded your first performance? Yeah, I could probably watch about a minute and a half without being like oh my god like because because part of it's like i get excited i'm like man i've come a long way that's so cool to like watch the progression of like you know even if just a few months ago like just watching the progression of just things tightening up but when i look at that i'm like oh my gosh like i didn't just go on stage because i wanted to go on stage i thought these were funny. I wrote this specifically because I thought it was funny. But when I watch it now, I'm just like, oh, my God. I embarrassed myself to myself to talk my way right now.

Yeah. No, it's embarrassing. So it's kind of cool to watch that progression. I think it works that way now, but it's a little different. You write something down or you think of something. When I think of something that I know is funny, I will literally laugh inside. Like, that's funny. There's a way to tell that where that will get laughs.

But before, you're like, no, yeah, I think that's funny. I think it's a totally different way that I write now. Back then, I would just write everything. I can make that funny. Now, it's more of like I'll be thinking of a premise and then I'll let it sit. And then let the funny come to me you know the back of my head right instead of like forcing it out you know like you write you can only write so much and it's like okay well let that be for now and and now i like i'll be driving and not even

think about it's like oh yes that's it right there yeah and you know that's gonna like you when it doesn't work god that fucking pain it's's such a pain. Like, I thought that was it. That was the gold mine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, all right. And blah, blah. Yeah. Nothing. Not there yet.

Okay. Thanks, guys. Thank you. Thank you very much. So funny. Thank you. Yeah, but there's nothing worse. There's nothing a worse feeling than going up there thinking it would be hilarious and

bombing. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's just the shitty part about comedy um that you have to fail in front of strangers like when you're learning the guitar people don't see you the first six months breaking strings and not hitting the right like frets and then six months later when you've been you know in your bedroom by yourself and then you're like hey you want to hear me play enter sandman they're like hey you're actually pretty good you're like yeah i know yeah yeah i'm just getting started yeah yeah i've never fucked up before.

Bands, too. Bands don't just get out there like, hey, man, this new song, I think it's going to work. Let's try it out for the crowd tomorrow. Yeah. You guys just follow me, okay? Yeah, just follow me. They do covers, and they get good enough at doing covers where they're like, all right, well, now I can start making my own stuff.

I've already written my own stuff, but here's a cover of Dave Matthews, and they hit it, and it's solid. And then they're like, oh, and by the way, let me sneak in my song that I wrote here. It kind of sounds like Dave Matthews, but it's good, too. And then they're like, oh, man, they're awesome. You guys should start doing the ones that you wrote. And then all of a sudden, they got a CD out, and it's shitty. Speaking of cover bands, thank you for bringing that.

Tuck and I have a cover band now. Oh, good. We only cover Prince. It's called When Doves Die. Check us out at Sidebar this Monday. When Doves Die. Well, it's a little

depressing, but hey, you fellas seem to know what you're doing. What we like to do is we like to take the depressing angle in there so people are already ready for it.

So if it's bad, they're like, hey, well, they meant to be bad. Yeah, exactly. But if it's good... And we practice none of these.

We do it first time in front of the crowd. Wow. Hey, guys, it takes a lot good. And we practice none of these. We do it first time in front of the crowd. Wow. Yeah. Hey, guys, it takes a lot of guts to do what you're doing. It does.

Good for you guys. I know. He's black and I'm white. Ebony and ivory. Ebony and ivory. I thought you said banana and ivory. Oh, wow.

Banana and ivory. No, I totally said ebony. Banana. Banana. Banana. Woo. All right, fellas. We got said Ebony. Banana. Banana. Woo. All right, fellas. We got to wrap this thing up.

Say sorry I was super late. No, not a problem. Not a problem. We got started, too. Yeah. Yeah, we got, you know, first half of talk. We got in all our Ryan bashing early. Okay, good.

So that was good. So what do you guys want to plug? I know you guys are on Twitter, right? Yeah. You kids are on Twitter. I'm at thetalkmoff. Uh-huh. At thetalkmoff. T-O-K-M-O-F-F.

Double F. Yep. I have a website, www.talkmoffett.com. Hey, now. It's got some cool stuff on there. Like pictures of volcanoes and shit. Yeah. A lot of African pictures, basically.

And, yeah, I like to be followed and stuff like that. Not on Twitter. Hey, ladies. Ladies. Yeah. Uh-huh. I'm on the tweets at alldaymolly, at alldaymolly. Mine's pretty simple.

At Ryan Naser, R-Y-A-N-N-E-S-E-R. At Ryan Naser. Boom. Boom. And, of course, our comedy group, Rectum Comedy. Our Twitter is at Rect Comedy. Uh-huh. And, of course, we put on shows at the Cellar Door every Sunday now. And then on Tuesdays, we have an open mic at Guido's.

Yeah. Speakeasy and Frederick. So we've got a lot of good things going on. Uh-huh. Excited. You guys perform all over D.C., Maryland, Virginia area, so follow them on Twitter. Stay up to date on shows and all that.

Thank you guys for joining us. Thank you for having us. When I say us, I mean me, Jesus Christ, of course. Jesus is always watching. For those listening, you can follow me, Josh Cotton Candy Kaderna, on Twitter. I am at better robot josh

the podcast is at dig sesh pod and for the absent michael moran who is working doing the lord's work i'm sure uh he is at michael moran 10 digression sessions.com for past and future episodes we're on stitcher itunes give us a rating if you're feeling froggy you know go go in there write a comment or two and uh yeah come see us live digressionsessions.com calendar has all of our upcoming dates thank you guys for being on the show we like to end the show by saying if you like somebody tell somebody so i'm gonna say if you like somebody and you guys in unison are gonna say tell somebody all right okay black if you like somebody tell somebody