The Digression Sessions - Ep. 126 - John Moffitt! (@Moffitt74)

Episode Date: August 4, 2014

Bye Bye Week Follow Us On Twitter! @Moffitt74 – Ben Rosen @BetterRobotJosh – Josh Kuderna @SweepAlex – Alex Braslavsky @MichaelMoran10 – Mike Moran @DigSeshPod – For Podcast Updates! Hola DigHeads! On this week’s episode, Josh has one hell of an interesting and hilarious interview with a former offensive lineman for the Seattle Seahawks and the Denver Broncos, John Moffitt! And Alex Braslavsky sits in as guest cohost! Moffitt retired from the NFL in the 2012-2013 season while he was in his prime, at the age of 27. He didn’t want to “risk health for money” and walked away from about $1 million in salary, various benefits for retirees who play at least three seasons and a trip to the Super Bowl. But, he would not change a thing! Moffitt was a completely open book and discuss a wide range of topics from his thoughts on the NFL, the existence of alien robot conspiracies, his degree in Sociology, his own yet to be named podcast, phone beeps, trying improv and stand up, the draft of Michael Sam as a publicity stunt, and more! What an ep! Thanks for listening! If you can swing it please drop our asses a few bones via the “Donate” button on DigressionSessions.com! Also please subscribe to Digression Sessions on Stitcher and iTunes. And check out our podcast network, Thunder Grunt! Thanks everyone! We love you!

Thunder Grunt Podcast Network. Welcome to the Digression Sessions Podcast. Hey everybody, I'm Josh Kaderna. And I'm Mike Moran. And you're listening to the Digression Sessions Podcast. A Baltimore-based comedy talk show hosted by two young, handsome stand-up comedians slash improvisers. Join us every week as we journey through the world of comedy and the bizarreness of existence. As we interview local and non-local comedians, writers, musicians, and anyone else we find creative and interesting.

Yes. Who's the guest this week? John Moffitt is the guest on this week's program the former offensive lineman for the seattle seahawks and the denver broncos is our guest that's right it's a first for the digression sessions a former nfl player uh did an interview with us and it was uh a lot of fun man uh you can find john on twitter he is at moffitt 74 uh very funny guy so go follow him uh some background on john real quick he uh like i said he played in the nfl um he was with the seahawks for a bit he's got his knee blown out in the game uh bounced around and ended up at the playing for the denver broncos last year

um it's about midway through the season last year, and John just decides to retire. He's done. He said he realized that he was just done destroying his body and risking his health for money. So such an interesting story to your whole life, basically, to make it to the NFL, the dedication and the hours spent just trying to finally get somewhere. And then you're like, oh, this the hours spent just trying to finally get somewhere. And then you're like, oh, this isn't what I want to do at all. And he walked away from it. And now he's just pursuing all the stuff that he enjoys. He talked to us all about that, like what it was like in the NFL and the reasons for quitting, stuff that he's been up to since. He

tried stand up for a little bit. He taking improv classes such an interesting story uh really cool guy i can't say enough nice things about john and my guest co-host for this episode mr alex proslavsky he's the one that actually told me about john because he saw him on the real rob report i'm gonna try not to mumble through that the real rob report which uh had a bunch of bunch of inside locker room footage of the Seattle Seahawks. And John was always on there messing around. And he said he was the funniest guy on there. So when we heard that he retired, Alex was like, I think he retired just to get into podcasting. So you should hit him up.

And I was like, okay, I will. So it turns out John didn't retire specifically just to podcast. But that has become a part of what he's into. And I started a podcast called the Hearsay Podcast, which you can find on iTunes and hearsaypodcast.com. Maybe not at the time this drops, but about maybe a week or so. So give John some time. He's working on a podcast, which I'm sure is going to be interesting. So we're going to get the episode in a second.

I'm sure that's why everybody's listening. And if you haven't fast forwarded already, we're going to get into some plugs. Yeah, plugs. Follow us on Twitter. Me, Josh Kaderna. I am at Better Robot Josh. My co-host Alex for this episode is at Sweep Alex. And my normal co-host, Mr. Mike Moran. He is at

Michael Moran 10 on Twitter and the podcast itself is at dig sesh pod. So follow that. We're also on iTunes, Stitcher, digressionsessions.com. Have a bunch of previous episodes with comedians and all that stuff. Uh, musicians, all kinds of people. And then digressionsessions.com slash calendar has all of our live upcoming dates. So come see us live. Come see us do stand up and improv. You won't want to miss it. Yeah. We perform primarily on the East Coast, but sometimes we get beyond that. But I will be in Timonium, Maryland august 14th through the 16th doing stand-up at magubi's joke house and i'll be hosting for the great bobby slayton and i do a show with alex and some a friend of ours called chuckle storm which is a live talk show with live sketch and stand-up

and interviews that's going to be wednesday september 17th here in Baltimore at the Auto Bar. So check that out. And like I said, all of our live dates are listed at digressionsessions.com slash calendar. I think the rambling intro is over. Thanks to everybody that's listening. Thanks again to John. And now let's get into it. Let's give John Moffitt a ring, shall we? We love you. Hello? Hello. Hey, can you hear me? Yeah, yeah.

Can you hear us? How's it going? Yep, gotcha. Nice. are you on speakerphone as well? I am, is it coming through okay? Yeah, it's coming through alright But honestly it'd be a little bit better If we could do on your end without the speakerphone Is that possible?

Yeah, I'll get on the phone Sweet, thank you How's this? Much better Crystal clear Much better Perfect,, crystal clear. Much better. Perfect. No problem.

Well, how's it going, man? Going good. Going good. How are you guys? I'm doing quite well. How's it going? Josh, I talked to you, but who is your... I'm sorry, I forgot your name. This is Alex. So, yeah, normally, now and again, I'm joined by my confidant and co-host, Mike Moran, but he couldn't make it. But my buddy Alex, who's a very funny gentleman as well, he's joining me. Awesome.

And I'm a big fan of Real Rob Report, and that's how I first discovered you. Oh, nice. Very cool. Yeah, it's crazy because as an offensive lineman No one really should know you But because of that show now I have a ton of people who know me from that Online, underground, cult following

Yeah, you became kind of like A cult hero in Seattle because of that, right? Yeah, it's like It's a weird, it's a pseudo It's like a pseudo thing And then whenever I do something bad That's definitely going to be covered. Right, right.

Yeah, they can just cut to random clips. Exactly. Well, you were doing the Lord's work by trying to find out if Russell Wilson was a robot or not. Oh! That one almost set itself up, because I was just watching this dude do stuff, and I'm like, oh my God. He is a robot. He has motion. He is a robot. He has motion. He just does work.

Did he ever mention that to you? Did that ever come up? The whole thing? Did people, did fans come up to him and do this whole robot thing? Yeah. He thought it was pretty funny and I kind of told him while I was doing it because it wasn't like I was trying to put him on the spot or make fun of him.

It was just like, all right, I'm going to let you in on the joke. We're going to set up a joke. And then I kind of told him. So he took it well and he thought it was funny. Yeah, he seems like he has at least a decent sense of humor about it because I saw you tweeted at him recently. He tweeted something like, the king is inside you, like this real positive kind of tweet, I think,

I guess about the Lord. And he tweeted back at me like, and sometimes real positive kind of tweet, I think, I guess about like the Lord, and you tweeted back and you're like, and sometimes I'm inside of him. Yeah. Because I saw that tweet and I was just like, the king is inside me? That just feels like... I don't know. He's got a good sense of humor.

I think he knows, not that he even gives a shit that I'm saying anything, but I think he knows that I'm just messing with him. Yeah, totally, totally. Have you always had a really good sense of humor, though? I think for, yeah, I think for the most part, I have. I think until I probably, I don't know, I think, yeah, I think you always have to, just especially because playing football,

being an offensive lineman, your job kind of sucks anyways. You know what I mean? You kind of have that, like, there's no... You're fucked either way. Oh, wait, can I swear? Absolutely. Oh, okay, I can swear, great. You can swear, but it is a Christian program, but go ahead.

Get the fuck out of here. Is it really a Christian program? No, but that's the perfect response if it was. What the fuck? Get the fuck out of here. Okay. If I can't swear in my vocabulary, it's just me do things sometimes.

So, John, I'm sorry. It's just such a great way to express yourself. I think I've always had a sense of humor somewhat because of that. And like you were saying, too, most linemen aren't really known as it is. Even the ones that are the best, they don't really get any credit.

You know, like, there's not a lot of fans buying up linemen's jerseys and things like that. No, no one cares. I mean, I've had blocks, refs. I've, like, basically scored the touchdown for the running back. No one gives a shit. The running back can fucking walk in from the one-yard line untouched, perfect.

Everyone just still, like, they love him. Yeah, you leveled everybody, and they're like, yeah, good job doing what you're supposed to do, but the running back, woo! You ever see Angus? You ever see the movie Angus? Yes, I have. Angus just nails what it's like to be an offensive lineman, I feel like.

You don't have to be that much of a loser, but he really did. That movie, it was basically a fat offensive lineman kid who is a good-looking counterpart. James Van Der Beek always gets the girls, does all the dirty work, basically that kind of shit. And all you can really hope for is just a slap on the head from the running back. Like, good job, you did it for me. But really, it's my thing. Yeah, thanks, baby. Exactly.

Just a bone. Just throw me a bone. Were you always a lineman? Like, even when you played as a kid? Yeah. Younger, you can do other stuff. But, you know, it's mostly, yeah, you're mostly just, you're that big, you're going to play that. I think I was even funneled into the sport just because i was big you know what i mean

yeah like you're gonna just play this right that is like the number one question i think most bigger guys get like oh you should play ball like if you're you know you're taller and lankier like you should play basketball but if you're like a bigger dude they're like oh you play football like i guess i should i don't guess i have to know yeah it's crazy i've thought about that a lot like the way we kind of culturally assign people jobs almost sometimes based on size yeah probably definitely as you go deeper based on race i mean but it's just fucking crazy yeah right it's not like they saw you you were a big kid they're like you know what you're gonna be a lawyer you know it's just football. It's a foregone conclusion.

Yeah, it's just done. It's crazy. I really did enjoy my experience, and it was a fun thing to do, and it was a crazy kind of a lifestyle. So what about now? I guess the story right now is you've been out of the league for a little while now, so what's been going on? After I got out of the NFL, it was kind of a,

I think it was a real shock to me, just the media kind of attention it drew. In my mind, that was a backup. And the backup, I was like, I'm going to quit. I'm kind of done with this shit. I'm going to just walk out the back door and that'll be it. And then kind of,

it drew a ton of attention. And all of a sudden, I was getting calls from ESPN and all kinds of media outlets. As a result of not leaving on the best terms with the NFLPA, I had a lot of emotions about the NFL, about the whole entire institution, kind of fighting the man kind of a thing that I really went into. At the same time, I was also really going through this huge party mode because I wasn't playing football. I was partying, still partying like I was playing football, but kind of doing both at the same time. You know what I mean? And really kind of, I kind of got, kind of got caught

up a little in Chicago, got in trouble. And then from there, cleaned up, cleaned up my act, stopped drinking, stopped everything. And so I'm kind of just, yeah, it was, honestly, this year has been just a crazy year for me. Like, probably more life-changing experiences than I know a lot of people kind of going through all at once. Yeah. Yeah. And it seemed, yeah, it seemed pretty constant, too. Like, as soon as you quit, pretty much it's just the the media just kept going and then you're like well i am kind of free and i don't have any responsibilities i want to

live my life and then that goes too far like it seems like a thing that was just perpetually just going and going yeah plus you know you dedicate i mean it was like it's a cult i mean you dedicate your whole life to that kind of a lifestyle and now i'm kind of just figuring out where to go from that writing a lot kind of just doing creative stuff because for the first time i'm like finally really free you know i mean and clear and open so it's kind of it's very exciting lately but i'm not doing like a ton of shit you know what i mean like life's kind of boring so you just you just have a ton of a ton of free time at this point yeah ton of free time and i do some creative stuff i just i do a podcast which uh i just started with free time and i do some creative stuff i just i do a podcast which uh

i just started with a friend and i do some writing and things like that but oh really kind of just figure figuring out what's next you know what i mean yeah that's so cool i was going to ask you about that because i i heard that you wanted to get into podcasting that's what alex told me too he's like yeah you should talk to this guy. He quit the NFL to start a podcast. It wasn't, you know, I was interviewed like a hundred different times so it wasn't necessarily

just that one thing but people would just, they kept latching on and using it like, you know, spinning it in their way to install it.

Right. Like, oh, he left the NFL. What's that? No, I was saying, like,

yeah, like what you're saying to make you seem like crazy. Like, oh, he did it so he could record on his MacBook, you know? Exactly. It was a lot of stuff, but it was, but yeah, I am doing the podcast. I do like it. It's been fun.

So, you guys, now, you're comedians, right? You do stand-up as well, right? Yeah, I do. Oh, real quick, though. What's the podcast called? Your podcast. I haven't named it yet. Really? I have no clue yet. Yeah, we haven't. We've quick, though. What's the podcast called? Your podcast. I haven't named it yet. Really?

I have no clue yet. Yeah, we haven't. We're going to start recording. We've done like one or two. We're going to do like a few more and then start to release it and kind of figure it out there. It's an unnamed podcast. What's it going to be?

What is the theme of it? What's the genre? Is it a comedy podcast? Is it just talk? I think it's going to just be talk. Kind of more, maybe more current events. I'm really interested in that kind of aspect. I love politics. I don't really take it seriously, but I like to talk about what's going on in the world. And then probably maybe some sports. I could definitely do some sports. I still think it's fun to talk football.

Yeah, I heard that you were a fan of Joe Rogan So his podcast is kind of an umbrella He casts a pretty wide net of everything that he talks about too Yeah, I'm a really big fan of him He's talented, man I like where he goes And he does it really I think it's tough to really go out there

And keep people's attention And keep them still based in reality I watched one of his where he's talking about he doesn't really, I think it's tough to really go out there and keep people's attention and keep them still like based in reality. Yeah. Like, I mean, I watched one of his where he's talking about like, we might be in the matrix.

Yeah. Yeah. No. Yeah. He could talk about it. Like they can go from talking about Dick jokes to talking about how we live in the singularity and talk about it for three hours, you know,

like each, every, like his average time on his podcast is, like, over three hours. And people listen to every minute of it. It's insane. And the whole sensory isolation tank that he owns. Yeah, the deprivation tanks. That's really cool. I don't know if you're aware of that, John.

Those things are, I've done those. Oh, you have done those? Yeah, I've done that. It's intense, man. The first couple times doesn't work, the third or fourth time you start to go into these like deep meditations and you can get visions and stuff it's nuts

I feel like I've noticed a couple times on the Real Rob report that's something you're kind of into meditation and that kind of thing yeah I love the weird I love the weird stuff or anything really out there you know or kind of thing. Yeah, I love the weird. I love the weird stuff, or anything really out there. You know, or kind of,

you know, not, like those pseudosciences. I'm a really big fan of that. I find it really interesting, because I just don't think we really know what the hell's really going on anyways. So I'm open to anything, you know? So aliens exist? Dude, they have to.

They have to exist. I was thinking about this yesterday. Yeah. They have to. Think about this one. This one is always what gets me. Like, 1900, we barely had cars. Like, the first car was rolling down the street, and people were like, holy shit.

Yeah. And then all of a sudden, a hundred years later, in a hundred years, we made more technological advances than, like, all of human history combined. Like, it's crazy. I just can't think there's not alien help there, you know? So, oh, you think the aliens are helping us? Yeah, for sure. Well, I just... Oh, go ahead.

I think it's just weird. I don't think they would... If they were going to hurt us, they would have done it by now. This is, like, when you really get into this talk. It's just weird. I don't think they would... If they were going to hurt us, they would have done it by now. This is like when you really get into this talk. It's just bullshit. But, you know, like, I really would think they would be helping us with technology because all of our technology is getting better and better.

It's definitely not from us, I feel like. You know? Yeah, there's an interesting theory floating out there that aliens are helping us with technology or even if aliens, they're not like physical beings like we think about, like they could even just be like a bacteria or something we can't even understand.

And the way they're rewarding these people that are progressing technology. I don't know if you've heard this, Alex, but like, like Bill Gates is one of the richest men in the world because he keeps technology going. So like, yeah,

let's give him money. We'll get this going. And then eventually we're going to have robots and robots are going to take care of us and stuff. And we'll almost be like dogs. We already have a robot. He's playing quarterback for the Seattle Seahawks. Exactly.

He won the Super Bowl so he was rewarded with that. That's true. And the king he's talking about is this king robot. So John Moffat has penetrated the king robot. Yeah, so John, you quit because you wanted to get out of this robot matrix, right? That's exactly what it was. I had real deep, deep personal reasons why,

and I couldn't even tell the public, but it was basically robot alien conspiracy theory. Exactly. And this brings me to my next question. John Elway, clearly a robot as well, right? Oh, my God. Elway was actually, I really like John Elway. I mean, I really

I like a lot of people I've met in the NFL, but I really like Elway. He was a good dude. He was a cool head guy. I really liked him. Yeah. Are you saying that, is he in the room with you, John? Just say a phrase. He was a cool guy.

It sounds like he's right here, like I'm worried about, but we are wiretapped anyways, so I don't know if I was saying anyways, but yeah, I think all quarterbacks are a bit robotic, you know what I mean? I think it's kind of like what the job requires, just guys like Russell do it really well. Yeah,

I think they have to train their brain differently, because they need to be literally monitoring so many things at once, running through different scenarios. Like, okay, this guy's over here. This is happening. Like, so much stuff is going on at once, like just a matter of seconds before they make a decision. And the thing that I think makes it really fun is that they're scared shitless, that they have like four seconds to do this or they're going to just get killed. Right.

You know, there's like that imminent fear factor, which is just great. Right. to do this or they're going to just get killed. There's that imminent fear factor, which is just great. Right, and I heard in an interview with you that one of the reasons you said, too, that you wanted to quit is that if your heart's not really in it, so you can't really defend the quarterback as much as you could. You didn't want to be responsible for somebody getting hurt just because you kind of fell out of love with football. You know, like, oh, shit, I should have been guarding that guy a little bit harder, but I don't really care. You know?

Yeah, I think it was definitely that, and it was my own personal safety as well. Yeah. When you stop taking it as seriously as I was taking it, which I stopped taking it seriously after a while, it gets dangerous. And for the guys around me and for myself, which is definitely one of the, you know, out of many reasons. I was like, yeah, this really isn't for me anymore. Do you remember a specific point or a certain time frame where that started crossing your mind of, I'm not taking this seriously, I'm not feeling it, that kind of sentiment?

Yeah, I think it was over time. I think it was just a thing that kind of grows. But I do remember being concerned. I blew my knee out my rookie year. No help was kind of on. Yeah, that shit sucks. That's terrible. That happened in Baltimore, right?

Yeah, it happened against Baltimore, but in Seattle. Well, on behalf of our Ravens, I apologize. That was our bad. Yeah, exactly. I can't remember who it was, but they got me good, I apologize. That was our bad. Yeah, exactly. I can't remember who it was, but they got me good, man. It was a good tear. So I became a little more body conscious, and then the head stuff kind of stopped concerning me a little bit. I really started to think about it.

Brain stuff really freaks me out because you just don't know because it's your own mind thinking. You know what I mean? So the thought of having head trauma and it really affecting my daily thought processes, that's what affects me. You know what I mean? Yeah, like you're not even in control of yourself anymore. When you can't trust your own brain, then it gets really scary.

Exactly. And I'm not at that point. I don't think that I'm there. I don't think I'll be there. I think I have a really healthy brain, and I think my thoughts are all fine for the most part other than being weird as shit. I think there's that potential, you know what I mean, where it would be down the road and I just didn't want to do it. Right. You're like, I don't want to keep the process going. I'm not trying to accentuate it through any means of my own. Exactly. Exactly. Have you had any scares?

The craziest thing is when I played, I was so unhealthy. I partied, everything like that, and now that I don't play, I quit everything healthy. John, do you hear that you keep bumping the phone with the beeps? Yeah, I'm sorry. Hold on, let me put the...

I got the keypad away. My phone is completely smashed. It sounded like you kept censoring yourself. Yeah, it sounded like the robots were trying to... You know, I'm worried about my brain. You know who I really blame? Beep! Like, what?

Who was it? John, beep! Elway! I have a personal sensor that just walks around yeah just in case yeah somebody from the nfl players association just following you around exactly so have you had any scares with with with your head you know the only thing that happened with me i mean i've gotten hit in the head a lot i've gotten what you would consider concussion and such playing but the only thing that really freaked me out is there's like a little kind of a squiggly line kind of in my sight and some blotches like

you know color blotches and stuff like that just in one of my eyes which i was told was from kind of hits and stuff like that which is natural but it's just, that was kind of what sparked it. That happened, like, that's sort of about a year ago. Yeah. I was like, all right, this is weird. I've gotten those before, and I haven't really done any really, like, physical sports or anything. I think I just have bad eyes. But I know you're talking about, you see, like, kind of, like, squigglies just kind of, like, float right across your eyes. Yeah, yeah.

And it happened, and it's just constantly there. Still to this day, you have them. What's there. Still to this day, you have them? What's that? Still to this day, you have them? Yeah. Oh, wow. It's like a, you know, it just doesn't go away. And it kind of shows up against bright light or whatever.

Yeah. But that, I mean, I'm pretty good at my knee, you know, some stuff, but it's kind of what you'd expect. I mean, I did know what I was doing when I was doing it, as far as body injury and such. Yeah, absolutely. I came out of it not bad. Yeah, no, I mean, I think you got out of the perfect time where you're like, alright, I've kind of banged up my knee. I'm not trying to accentuate this through a continued play. Because I've read in other interviews where you've said that

every play you're doing something physical. You're always in the trenches on the offensive line. It's not always the big hits, but it's just a grind. Every play, there's potential for something to happen. Exactly. It's just a consistent kind of a battery.

It makes it a really... It gives you a short lifespan as far as playing and such so but uh yeah I'm done I'm 27

and kind of just figuring out what's next I have no I have no clue what to do that's the kind of thing I have no clue

what I want to do you know well that's the thing you were born three days after I was and now we're both just podcasting man you know

the universe has a way to figure stuff out you know I think you're on the right path. I love it. I think it's like, if you've got a couch, I'll come move out there, and I'll sleep on your couch. Please, let's do it.

We have a futon. Yeah, man, we'll set it up. We'll set up the Moffat futon. There's the podcast. There's the podcast name. Yeah, that'll be the podcast. We'll just do it from the futon. Moffat futon.

Yeah. Moffuton. Yeah, you won't even have to. John Moffuton. Moffitt futon. Yeah. Moffitt futon. Yeah. You won't even have to. John Moffitt futon. There we go. Exactly. Um,

so I'm guessing that you had enough money saved up where you kind of could take this year off and just kind of figure out your next step, right? Yeah. Yeah. I, uh, I,

I pretty much was pretty good. I have a really good financial advisor and I kind of just, you know, saved and didn't buy a bunch of stuff. My whole thing was going to do stuff. I like to spend my money to go do things, like go somewhere, go have fun. So I wasn't the guy that needed two cars and bought a house.

Yeah. I live in a townhouse. Yeah. So it's... I think there's enough cautionary tales now like it still happens but like those espn 30 for 30s on uh players spending too much money like that documentary completely broke yeah completely broke where they you know they're just trying to show up the other guys that they play with like oh you showed up to practice at a ferrari i'm gonna bring a lamborghini

the next day and just insane stuff like that so you weren't bringing uh lamborghinis to practice john no i didn't have that i didn't have that kind of money you know what i mean i was like medium not even medium in the pack like i was like third round so i don't think i could have afforded a lamborghini but i think uh i mean i did have my fun but i didn't buy shit and do all that crazy stuff but i actually love watching guys like buy stuff i think it's fun you know like i love when guys... I mean, I'm sorry if they'll be broke or we'll all be broken however many years, but I just think it's really...

It's funny to see the stuff that guys will buy. Yeah, that whole documentary was insane, too. They're paying for all their entourage and stuff. Like, I don't care. It's like, well, you probably should. It's not going to last. I mean, even if you have a good NFL career, like we're talking about,

you can get hurt at any time, and then you're just done. Dude, I think it's crazy, too. You just get used to spending crazy money on shit, and it just doesn't even calculate. Like, Anton Walker spent $120 million or something. How do you do that? Yeah, it's insane.

Well, it's just crazy thinking, you know, they sign their signing, they get their signing bonus, they're insane. Well, it's just crazy thinking, you know, they get their signing bonus. They're like 21, 22 years old. They've never had that money. They were struggling to make money in college because the NCAA doesn't pay them at all. And then they got this like $30 million signing bonus. How do you deal with getting that amount of money and never really having to worry about money

at that point? Yeah, you're just insanely rich. So anything you want is just available. And you think... You deal with it by spending it as much as possible, as fast as possible. That's how you deal with all that pressure. So you never have to worry about it again? Exactly. Just get this money out of my hands

as fast as possible, and then I'll figure it out after. Yeah, I'm going to buy a gold toilet, and then I'm going to think about this, all right? Then I'm going to calm down. Well, you know what the real, I think that sports money, honestly, it's not as real as entertainment money.

You know what I mean? Where these guys are getting royalties, like's kind of, it's not as real as like entertainment money. You know what I mean? They're like, well, these guys are getting royalties, like musicians and actors. Like sports is kind of that subcategory where, okay, you're paying Manning, you're a quarterback, you're paying, but everyone else is kind of like in between. Whereas if you're like a major actor, you're doing your job, you know? Are you bleeping out people's names again, John? I'm bleeping again because my keypad keeps coming up as it's pressing against my face. It's like my face, I'm sweating or something.

You know what I mean? I'm like, when I need a cough. Don't be nervous. You're doing great, John. Yeah, we'll stop asking the tough questions. It's just a pure size thing. It's not even a nervous thing. I'm sweating if you guys weren't on the phone.

Right, just standing there. Exactly. Have you lost a lot of weight since you stopped playing? Yeah, I've lost about 30 pounds. When I played, I was like 325, and then I lost some for Denver, and then I lost about

30 athletes. I'm about 280 right now. Wow, and that's kind of like your natural walking around weight? No, no. I think I'm about 280 right now. Wow. And that's kind of like your natural walking around weight? No, no. I think I'm thinking 240 probably. I think I'll lose around 30 or 40 pounds. I think my knees will really feel good.

Right, right, right. So your big thing, you keep making this joke of I'm not worthy of being in the league. How did a guy like me get in the league? I never work out. How much of that is real and how much of it – now that you don't really have the pressure of competing against the best people in the country,

have you cut down on how much you work out and that kind of stuff? Yeah. I think a lot of that stuff I was totally joking because I was fat and I was like, and I still looked like, no matter how much I did work out, I just still had just a body that didn't look like it. So that was kind of a joke that I kept playing. But I worked out really hard throughout my entire career. I always played football really hard, you know.

But it was just funnier to me to, you know, it's a joke, it's funnier. But right now I probably work out like four or five times a week, and it's like 45 minutes to an hour just cut down just for health. Whereas before I was working out to be as strong as possible and all these competitive aspects to it, you know? Well, it is. I mean, it's super refreshing to hear somebody go the opposite route and do the joke of i never work out whereas all

the it seems like a bunch of football players their whole thing is like i'm the best i'm the strongest yeah i'm in the i'm the first to get to the gym the last to leave that type of thing how much of that did it like existed in the locker room of just you know trash talking and saying i'm the best that can yeah um you know what? I thought more it was kind of the opposite in the NFL because by the time you got there, and obviously there's always guys, and guys do work hard, but I think guys, for the most part, when you're in the season,

you're sick and tired of lifting weights. You're sick and tired of practicing. You've been so long, so it's kind of a, I think it was a funny thing kind of for where I was at, too, in my head. I was like, dude, fuck football right now. Fuck the season. It's kind of that thing, you know?

Yeah, yeah. So, let's see. So, so, yeah, I wanted to ask you, too. You got your degree in sociology, right? I did. I did get my degree in sociology. That was a, it was kind of like that pick a major. Right now, you can be eligible.

Right, right. I was going to ask you if you had any advice, because my girlfriend is a sociology major, and she's about to graduate. Any advice? Oh, well, that's awesome that your girlfriend's, what is she, like 24 now? 23? She's 26. She took a little time off. She went to Chile for a year and taught English down there.

Oh, wow. I'm impressed, man. That's really good. I was thinking she was like a 22-year-old who was 27 and she was dating a college girl. Yeah, I show up in my Camaro in the parking lot and I pick her up after class. You know. You have like the jean

jacket on and the t-shirts. Yeah, I got Leonard Skinner. Yeah, I got Leonard Skinner and tap out stuff and my collars popped. Aviators. I have two pairs of aviators on. Because I go for it when I go for it. Dude, what is she doing with her sociology major? Because I got to know too.

I have a guess. I have a guess. I have a guess. I think she's going to play as a lineman in the NFL. Her agent said, hold out for the fifth round. So, you know, we're hoping if she doesn't do that, we're moving to Canada, she's going to play arena ball. That's what I'm thinking. That's a good call.

Good call. I think that's the right move for her future, honestly. Yeah. I've been there. have you thought about that like in a couple years like if you're like you know what i got enough space from this thing i get it i get a contract in canada for to play like arena ball or even like i think there's an arena league here in america would you go back uh it's tough i don't like right now the state of mind I'm in now, like, no. Yeah.

I wouldn't. Yeah. But I change so much, but I just don't think, I think I'm really done with football. Like, I know I don't want to play in the NFL again. Yeah. Yeah. Arena ball is, like, I don't know if I could play that. I mean, for me, it's just I don't want to risk my body again.

By then, the way I look at it is, to me, like, offensive lineman is pretty much done by the time they're like 33, 34. So I am 27. I do have time, but I just think it's like once you start getting to 30, do you really want to do it? Do you really want to risk it? Do you really want to go back and get hurt and then be like, oh, okay, like good move? You know what I mean? It's kind of a, yeah. I really am done with the game, you know,

and kind of looking forward to doing other things, you know? Right, right. Absolutely. Well, if my girlfriend gets any leads on the internships, I'll forward them to you. Let me know, because I could totally, you know, I forgot sociology was my major. You forgot.

You forgot. That's so great. All that head trauma. That's right. Exactly. It just seems so far away. You know what I mean? It was only three and a half

years ago, four years ago now. But I know it's like, oh, I believe myself again. It was, you know. Yeah. It was just, yeah. It was, a lot's happened since. So.

Yeah. That's so great. You forgot what your major was. I love that. Yeah. You're like, nah, I went to school for football, bro. I wasn't too worried about class. That was it.

So when you get your scholarships, so you get a bunch of offers or whatever, when it comes to apply, you've already accepted and told that school you're going there, so you only apply to one school. The weirdest thing, I applied to one school that was University of Wisconsin, and my guidance counselor was

freaking out. She said, what if they don't accept you? What if they don't accept you? It was an all-boys Catholic school, so it was Sister Rosemary. I'm like, Sister Rosemary, I got a scholarship. They're going to accept me. This isn't about academics. From then on, that was it. It was just football. You just blew her mind. I didn't, that was it. It was just football. You just blew her mind. She was like, oh, I didn't know that was a thing.

Yeah, right. She's like, well, I mean, football's nice, but what are you going to do about your studies? What if they don't accept you? Who's going to be your backup? What's going to be your backup school? And then you're like, no, I'll do it. Yeah, none. None. None, none. none your business none um so yeah i mean it's even going from like playing football your entire life and then just not doing it that has to be crazy i mean if you just do anything your whole life and then you're like well i'm just never

going to do that again i can see why that, that transition period is kind of like, what am I doing? What's happening? And you're enjoying it, but did you just kind of get lost there for a little bit? Because earlier you mentioned the Chicago thing. And when I talked to you on the phone, you were really cool about it before the interview. You're like, I'm a completely open book. You can ask me anything, man.

That cocaine I had, I wasn't going to sell it. That cocaine was just for me. You're like, yeah, yeah i did have cocaine on me but it was just for me i wasn't gonna i didn't fight anybody i was like wow yeah so that so basically you know here's party period like because i uh i broke up with my girlfriend really that's wow so wow so you it was crazy it was like a movie man i was like over my girlfriend. Really? So I left that house. Really? That's, wow. That's like a battle. Wow. Yeah.

So you... It was crazy. It was like a movie, man. I was like, I couldn't, it was like just everything was happening at once. And so, so I broke up with her and left the house and I went on like a tour of about six cities in six weeks and partied in every single one. And Chicago was the last one. Oh, wow. So you went on like an unofficial tour.

This was like the Moffitt Breaks Loose tour. Yeah. It was a solo, just me running around, solo wolf, just going nuts in every city in the country that I could think of. Were you getting offers for appearances, or was this just you, you know, I want to party in Toronto, I want to party in Chicago, that kind of thing? Basically, I want to party in Toronto, I want to party in chicago that kind of thing basically i want to party in toronto i want to party in chicago okay got it right right and so i just and it was basically like living because it was the nfl off season so i was seeing some friends here and there and uh it was still like i was living my off-season nfl life even though i was done with the NFL. Yeah. It just kind of battling with things like, like the way I drank in the NFL, I can't,

you know, it was just, clearly I had a problem, and that was something I needed to like come to terms with, and I definitely not have done it then, and I was running around just kind of going nuts. So in Chicago, it kind of all ended, and I had cocaine on me, and I had, I was drinking and the whole thing, and someone saw me with it, and I got cocaine on me and I had I was drinking and the whole thing and someone saw me with it and I got caught with it but the way that they spun it was that I was dealing drugs and I punched a guy in the head but I never touched anybody I was that

and it was kind of a spun story because they were really worried about the way it all went down and with me kind of suing them or whatever you know right right because then it turns out too it's like oh this guy quit football now he's dealing cocaine you know? Right, right, because then it turns out, too, it's like, oh, this guy quit football, now he's dealing cocaine, you know? Yeah, it was a really, it all came together as a really interesting story that wasn't

exactly the way it went, you know what I mean? But if you link the whole series of things together in the press, it definitely looks like I quit football to deal drugs in Chicago, which some guys in Chicago actually deal drugs while they're still playing football. Oh. It kind of undermines me. All right. All right. Let's name names without any beeps.

Name names. Jay Cutler, I'm looking at you. Remember that receiver they caught? All of Chicago. Remember that wide receiver that they caught? Wait, I'm sorry. Go ahead. Do you remember that wide receiver from Chicago that they caught?

I remember the story, but I'm blanking on his name. Yeah, I don't remember his name either, but that's kind of what I was referencing. I'm just joking. Okay, sorry, sorry. I got you. I was like, the Chicago thing kind of like woke me up to it. You know what I mean? And I went to rehab, did the passages, Malibu kind of rehab thing, and kind of realized

a lot and cleaned up and now I'm just figuring out what to do, really. It was just a flash, a crazy, you know, year or so. So you were saying you were having, like, looking back on it, it was the alcohol during your NFL career was a little too much. Was that, like, in the offseason or during the season? No, it wasn't too much because, I mean, but it was just kind of the offseason or during the season? It wasn't too much, but it was just kind of the way the lifestyle that I had done.

Offseason, I would drink and party and have fun just like everybody else would. But then I kind of started to realize that when I was done with football, I was just drinking too much. And every time I did, it wasn't... Something bad would happen or it wasn't the best kind of thing anymore.

So it was like that realization really was what I was like, like, all right, I don't need to do this shit anymore. You know what I mean? Right, right. And it's not leading, leading to anything. Well, it's not leading to anything good. I'm sure like in the NFL, you're like, all right, we had a hard game, tough week. Now I'm going to blow off some steam. But when that's not around, you're just like, oh, I'm just drinking just a drink now.

No, exactly. And it was kind of like facing a lot of, you know, problems that you don't have to face or issues that aren't issues because I was playing, I was doing all this stuff that now when that part of my life is over and you're kind of looking at yourself introspectively, you're like, okay, like this needs to be changed or this isn't working. Unfortunately for me, it was like a really public way that I got to see like, oh, this isn't working unfortunately for me it was like a really public way that i got to see like oh this isn't working well honestly i'm i'm still like i'm really thankful that all that happened girls i never would have realized you know i mean i'd be calling you right now from

right right right kind of like right and then it kind of all worked out absolutely and the way that it kind of worked out too is kind of the best case scenario you know what i mean like you weren't hurt no one else was hurt it was more just like oh i kind of got caught up in this and this is uh this is a sign i need to slow down here no exactly all my chicago charges were dropped and and so i got off there and i'm really i'm in the clear and so it's like kind of like a fresh start like a super fresh start you know what i mean excellent and i kind of ripped away from my old life into the new one really fast and now i'm just kind of figuring it out, you know? Wow.

Well, can you talk us through when you get a negative story out there like that, how does that affect you? I mean, like, are people just calling you left and right? Because, you know, you had a thing at the beginning of your career where you got suspended for a few games. What happens? Like, talk us through being in this in the tab did we start the podcast yet guys we're about to we're gonna wait for you to to to nail down not not beeping the phone

and then we'll start yeah we have we have a timer going so like it's been five minutes since a beep you know like like i have at factories you know like it's been seven days since the last accident you know so once we get to once we get to 15 minutes we're gonna start this thing up man all right perfect no i'm just i just messed up with you um no no oh sorry real quick before you go into that i think that shows that you listen to a lot of podcasts because i feel like that's every guest question they're like is this the podcast have we started it's like yeah you have a microphone 40 minutes yeah yeah dude and i've done a few podcasts now and that's always a question i get and i'm like i'm like are you serious what else are we going to talk about let's talk about like everything yeah we're done basically right yeah exactly so sorry to cut you off you were going

to talk about the reactions and kind of getting a negative reaction from the public when that whole thing went down. Yeah, you know, I'm pretty sure that thing happened when I was a rookie with Adderall, which I didn't even know. It was kind of like a dumbass thing. But I've been used to it now,

just things happening or being in a paper. But I think with me, the biggest thing is just your inner circle like your people that are close to you anytime anything happens like for this Chicago thing I'll be like really just like are you okay and this and that and I had a few of those like you know you gotta clean it up

at Fox but like most people are really you know caring and loving. I think that's a key to my perspective. I think the thing to do is just not pay mind to trolls on the internet or articles that are written in a false light because they don't do

their homework or just because. It doesn't really matter. There's that fake internet world and then there's the real world of the people that I know. Absolutely absolutely absolutely i'm sure that must be so hard with the internet too because it's really just all about clicks like people aren't even reading the entire article it's just what they can frame into an easily digestible narrative of like oh this guy fucked up and he quit the nfl like oh of course he did moving on you know like they're not really looking into the entire story no and they and for the most part i don't think they care i think people are so angry sometimes on the internet that they just want to read some shit and get mad about it and post something and

then that's it you know what i mean and it's like okay it's like it's the same with twitter i always find those people that are super negative it's it's negative to the point where you're like dude you're really projecting some shit right now this is not about me man this is about you yeah are you are you mad at me or your mom like what's what's happening here oh oh i think we lost him john are you mad at your mom we lost the call we're gonna call we're gonna call John right back. John. Too many beeps. We had to hang up on him. You know what?

Too many beeps. I'm okay with it five or ten times, but when it gets to like 20 times. We all have our breaking point with the beeps. All right, let's call him back. People are going to love this part of the podcast. This is why they tune in. John. No, it should be ringing.

Here we go. Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message. Mr. Segal, 20 minutes. Zero. Three. He should be ringing. Here we go. Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voicemail. He's calling back. Hold. Oh, shit. I hung up on him. God damn it. Professional editing.

Nope, no editing. This is live. It's been forwarded to a call. Let's just take a moment We're gonna breathe I tried to call John, went to his voicemail He called me while I was calling him Are you not gonna cut this out?

No, this is real Oh, here he is, he's back John John? Hey, sorry I think I have No, no, I think you reached your beep limit, man. And we were just like, you're done.

We're hanging up. Yeah. I think I've said enough for today. Yeah, was that your agent? Did your agent hang up on you? I think that's what it was. It was the NFLPA. They just clicked.

Yeah. Goddamn Players Association. Exactly. Real quick, while we were talking about the media thing, while I was doing some research for this interview, there were so many hack journalists out there writing about when you finally quit, you quit after a bye week. And I don't know if you've seen this,

but in so many articles people wrote, and that bye week turned into John's bye-bye week. That was my bye-bye week. I actually really like that. I was like, oh, that's kind of clever. And then I saw it like four or five different spots that. I was like, oh, that's kind of clever. And then I saw it like four or five different spots and I was like, okay, guys, we can't all use the same joke.

It's going to be the title of his memoir. Yeah, the bye week. The bye-bye week. That bye week was so good, I just couldn't ever come back. I was like, ah. That's it. It's like when you decide to stay on vacation, you're like, fuck this, I'm done. I'm fuck this I'm done oh there it is again

another beep that's one sir we're tallying it up no I know what you mean you're like oh I'm just gonna live in the outer banks for the rest of my life I have to start moving from my house we're moving into a new spot because our landlords went bankrupt

and I just want to become a minimalist so bad. I just want to get rid of all of it. Throw everything out. Just throw everything away. I'm all about it. Except John's future futon and a TV. I just want to throw it all out. That's all we need.

That's all we need. We need each other. Do you think that you're going to go that way? Like, it seems like you really kind of thought about just kind of like capitalism and money and what we think about as careers. Do you think you're going to end up kind of going that way of being somebody that's just very bare bones? Like, all right, this is all that I need to survive. Of course, I'm going to need some income, but I'm just going to be somebody that just exists on barely what I need. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't know. I think I'm not trying to be like, buy everything unless I could.

But I think it's kind of, for me, it was like, I was very set up with the whole corporate model that I was in, which was football, which is how much of a corporate model do you really consider it? But still just that kind of that, you know, I was really sick of my job, and then I was really sick of the whole kind of, you know, I was really sick of my job, and then I was really sick of the whole kind of, you know, corporate America look.

I think that, I don't know if I would say I want to be a bare-bones minimalist. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, and I'm against it. But I'm also, I like to do a lot of shit, you know what I mean? Like, I like to have fun, and I'm kind know what I mean? Like, I like to go to places. I like to have fun. And I'm kind of, like, spoiled because in the NFL, you go to nice places. And I kind of like nice places for dinner. Yeah. It's like I'm in this weird hypocritical, like, middle.

Right. You know what I mean? I want to be a little fucking minimalist, but I still, like, don't have to be right now, so I don't want to. It's weird. But I totally respect the minimalist view and, like, the Patagonia way of life, if you will. Yeah. You know? Yeah, no, I know what you mean. It's the same thing of like, oh, this fucking corporate rat race.

But I would like to have a jet ski. You know? Yeah. That would be cool. But at the same time, I don't want to have to suck corporate cock to get it. But I might nibble on it to get a car. Give it a lick? Yeah, I'll give it a lick.

It's a balance, I think. I think you have to find the balance. I think for me, the NFL wasn't a balance. It was too much. You know what I mean? To pay. Like, it was my body. It was a lot of other shit.

And, you know, I don't see any wrong with it. You want to be a workaholic? Go for it. If that's your deal. You know what I don't see any wrong with it. You want to be a workaholic? Go for it if that's your deal. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. And the crazy thing, too, about the NFL is that it's a nonprofit organization.

Unbelievable. That's insane. You know, that little nonprofit, the NFL. A little mom and pop store. Mom and pop football store. That's so crazy. That's what I tried to tell the judge, man. I was like, I got to do these community service hours.

I was like, I'm playing the NFL. I've been doing community service for three years, bro. 16 weeks a year. Yeah, I was going to go down to the SPCA, but this National Football League, they really need my help. Really need my help. I got a big heart. Yeah, no, you're an angel, man. Good for you.

You're doing the Lord's work. Exactly. Doing the Lord's work. Exactly. So what's a typical day for you? Do you have a typical day now? No. I really don't. I mean, for me, I work out. So I've been working on this podcast thing.

I want to do, so I've also met this guy who's a, he's a director and can shoot, like, he shoots, excuse me, sorry, mostly short movies. And he's kind of offered to show me how to direct. Oh, that's cool. Yeah, I want to shoot, like, a quick, like, like, if you see like it's really big on YouTube, a little five minute or ten minute movies, like a chase or they have to do or something. There's one I just found called Mobius.

It was unbelievable. It was the coolest thing, like a five or ten minute movie, and it was just sick. So I kind of want to explore that and just give it a shot. I kind of mix up my day with something creative, something that I like, I write, and I'm kind of mix up my day with something creative Something that I like, I write And I'm kind of trying to meditate On some sort of job that I want to do You know what I mean?

Working out at the staple and then getting up and working on that at the staple Yeah Have you thought about Trying to do stand-up at all? I've done some stand-up actually Oh yeah? Yeah, right when I got out of the NFL. I did it like four or five months ago.

Wow. I did a few sets, and I opened up for this guy, Craig Gass. He kind of called me and took me under his wing and showed me exactly how to do it. Wow, yeah, we know of Craig. Yeah, I've heard of him. He's a funny dude. Yeah, he was really good and he kind of just showed me outside like a quick five minute ten minute set wow and um I really

liked it I really liked it um I'm kind of open to everything and trying you know anything really so how did you like it oh I liked it a lot you know what's crazy it's honestly it was more nerve-wracking than playing football. I was going to ask you that because I was going to ask if that was true. You're literally like guys are trying to destroy you while thousands and thousands of people watch versus just being on stage

for a couple hundred people for five minutes and you were more nervous about being on stage just talking into a mic. Yeah, and maybe it's because I'm new to that, I guess, but at the same time, I think...

Yeah. I don't know. It's something... It's more of a performance, I think. It's more of like a... It's more of the fear of performing

because it is just you. Yeah. And you've got to keep it going. It's like a... It's weird. It's almost like a relationship with the audience as you go. You know what I mean? And you feel them out and it's. It's weird. It's almost like a relationship with the audience as you go.

You know what I mean? And you feel them out. I think it takes way more on that side and a nerve-wracking perspective than football does. Because to me, football is like, call the play. I'm doing this. Yeah. It's a little more directed, you know?

Right, right, right. Well, no, that's cool, man. I hope, yeah, if you like it, if you keep doing it, that would be great, because you're a funny dude, and you already have that name recognition, so you could kind of just jump ahead a couple levels already, you know? Oh, I mean, hopefully. I really do respect what it takes to do that, honestly, and to be funny and to perform like that. I don't think it's something that can just be done like wing it. You know what I mean? It really is something I think that's very difficult. So I do respect her. Oh, cool, cool.

Did you bomb at all while you were on stage? Or did you kind of make it out of there? So Craig took me to, so the last, I did three sets. The last one I did was opening for him at the Pantages which is like a theater in Tacoma and that was like the like the legit one that was like he was doing his like full set and everything so before he took me to two to just do like open mics so we kind of had like a set ready and the first time I did I did really well I was just like I took all the nervous energy and I just projected it and it was like really good and the crowd I was going back and forth with and kind of going off, you know, off topic and stuff

and coming back. And then the second one, I was so confident that it sucked. Oh, boy. I love that. Yeah, that happened to me too. Like when I first started out, I was like, you know what, that wasn't so bad. I think I got this thing figured out.

And it's like, oh yeah, I don't know shit. Yeah, right. Sophomore slump. Like couldn't, slump i couldn't same thing couldn't connect with the audience like it came off arrogant you know what i mean it came off arrogant yeah and uh but the third one was really good though the third one was my best and that's kind of uh so so i was glad i got those two under my belt you know wow that's awesome yeah especially in a theater too you've only done it three times that's that's that's pretty up there it is don't you be better stop it my phone sorry guys my phone might be i thought

i was gonna die so i just put it in oh okay uh cool thank you no we appreciate you censoring yourself like we said this is a christian program so we appreciate it i know i know are you guys a church of latter-day, or is it just a evangelical, or what are you doing? Well, it's kind of a mix, you know. As long as you believe in our Lord Jesus Christ, we're good with it. We won't crucify you. Yep. Nope.

And don't be anything other than white or male, and that helps. And be straight. Straight as can be. Straight as an arrow. Please. You accept everyone, but that's kind of the way that it happens yeah no

we love everybody except the people I mentioned exactly exactly you guys how long have you been doing comedy for

me I've been doing I started out doing improv and I still do improv I did I started that about three years ago like taking classes here in Baltimore and then from the classes been doing uh i started out doing improv and i still do improv uh i did i started that about

three years ago like taking classes here in baltimore and then from the classes you audition then you get into the group and you have your own troop and uh so i've been doing that for about three three and a half years uh alex does improv too and then about a year and a half i started doing stand-up a year and a half ago and uh, yeah, it's been... I'm just signing up for an improv class, actually. Oh, yeah? I want to give it a shot. Yeah, yeah. Any suggestions?

Any advice? I would say listening is the biggest thing. They tell you, like, you know, the whole thing is like, you can never say no. You can't say no. You can say no if you want. You just, you can't deny the reality of a scene. If you're in a scene and somebody's like, man, it's really tough here on Mars.

You can't be like, we're not in Mars. We're in your basement. You're like, oh, okay. You know? Yeah. Yeah. You got to keep it going. I get that.

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. So you keep it going. Then you want to try to heighten and add details. But the biggest thing is just listening and reacting to what the other person's saying and not like, I think Alex and I have both taken classes with people that just want to do their own thing. Like literally there's people in classes that would just want to do

impressions and stuff. Like I saw this one guy try to shoehorn a George Bush impression in whenever he could. And it's like, okay, we're, we're not doing improv. I had a guy,

I had a guy who every scene involved, you know, uh, hurting an animal in some capacity like slamming its head in and it got really scary this guy. Right, you're like okay he just wants to kill animals. He doesn't want to do improv.

What brought you to take improv class? Just honestly I just was interested in it. I was interested because I was doing some stuff with the podcasting, and I do writing really anything creative. I've done some stuff on video and camera and stuff like that,

so I'll just date myself one more time. Dude, I don't even know why it's doing it, honestly. It's a real pain in the ass. You know what? It's just part of the charm of this podcast now. I'm glad we have it. The beep cast, man. I like it yeah

i love it i love it it's perfect um no that's cool you're doing improv i think you would be great you like you're a naturally funny dude so and improv they're good muscles to have too just being quick on your feet with uh with that type of thing yeah they say it helps with with radio and with stuff like this as well so i'm really open to trying anything that I didn't try, you know, before. Yeah. I mean, that's just so cool. You played in the NFL. You were on two teams that were in the Super Bowl last year.

Now you're like, oh, I'll do podcasts and I want to do improv. Like, that's so cool. I feel like that's miles apart from what I would think of, like, a traditional NFL guy. You know, like somebody that played football their entire life. Yeah. I don't think, you know, I was never really kind of the traditional NFL guy.

Even growing up, I didn't watch sports. I kind of just played and I was more of like a movie boss and all of that stuff. I was kind of like, you know, I like to play and then I like to do other things. The playing was enough,

you know? Yeah. Have you, have you found other guys in the NFL that are kind of on that same vein? Yeah, I think a lot of guys have their own lives and their own things that they like. I think, I just think that they're more, maybe more committed to the NFL than I was,

hence me leaving. Yeah. But I think guys definitely have to have a life outside, whether it's with a wife or they go fishing or whatever their interests are. I guess mine are just more in an artistic sense or creative sense, which maybe not a lot of guys want to do.

Maybe not. I just find guys like you that have that kind of energy, that's the most refreshing. I think of Chris Cluey who he hasn't been playing. He used to play

for the Vikings but his whole thing about... I hope being outspoken for political right. He's a big video game player. He's a gay rights advocate. And it doesn't... To be fair fair he seems kind of like a nerd which is even more refreshing that he's like a

professional athlete yeah totally but I don't know if that's a common thing that you find in the NFL yeah I don't I think some I don't know because the NFL is such a there is so many different types of people

because it's going all over the country. And I think you run into a lot of different people. But I do think that in regards to, like, I do like Cleary because I think he has outspoken about things that are more in line with, like, our generation. And it seems that the NFL is really a way to inject, like, the older generation's core values into society.

I think it is cool and clearly it'll say something and that's why I always try to say whatever my honest thoughts and beliefs were on things like societal things like homosexuality or whatever it really is I'd rather just say it so that we can be more mindful of what our

generation feels about it so things actually change. You know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. What do you think about that? Do you think the NFL is kind of evolving in its... Specifically with Michael Sam and just openly gay players.

Do you think it's changing? Have you noticed that in the locker room? I don't know because they don't let me in the locker room anymore as much as I try. That would be great. You're like, that would be so great. You're like, look, I don't want to play the game. I just want to hang out. I really like you guys. I really support gay rights and I just want to hang out in the locker room again. Is that cool? John Elway? Hello? John, I was a big fan of yours. Now get in the locker room and let's talk it out.

But when you did play, did you notice, like, what do you think is going to happen? Are you optimistic that there will be more people coming out and playing? I don't know. The Michael Sam thing, to me, I think was a really big publicity stunt just because the Rams, Jeff Fisher I think he's married to like Goodell's daughter or something like that Fisher's also like the head of the coaches

union or whatever I'm getting confused on their all their official names but uh basically i think they took him as kind of like a a thing because to me the nfl's still run by like old white rich guys so it's always going to perpetuate that kind of a feel yeah yeah you know to speak totally freely is like a, a lot of dudes in the NFL are Christians. Like, a lot of them are, like, hardcore Christians. Right. Yeah, like, you kind of see that. I mean, I see it on TV sometimes after the games.

Like, most guys go out to, like, the 50-yard line, and they all have that prayer circle after a game. Yeah, exactly. And so it's like, to me, so as much as there are guys, I think, in the minority that are, like, willing to, like, be open about these issues, I think there's still guys that are stuck in, like, so the Christian right and then the NFL is basically the right because all these guys are oil. And I think it's kind of still a – Yeah. I think it's still kind of like an old –

it's like an old world, old school style of thought. Yeah, totally. I mean, you got Jerry Jones and Robert Kraft. Those guys don't seem to be the tip of the spear as far as being advocates for political rights or gay activism or anything.

Our religion's money, and we don't want to stray from that, pretty much. Yeah, and they're not the closest thing when you think of comic book bad guys. They're like the executives. They look like that. Jerry Jones looks like... He just looks evil.

He looks like... Who's Darth Vader's the guy who ran home? Oh, yeah. Oh, God, I'm blanking on it. You know who I'm talking about? I know. He used to be Senator Palpatine. That wizard guy. Oh, God.

What's his name? They all look like Senator Palpatine right before. Yeah. No, absolutely. They're all about to turn. Yeah, you could picture Palpatine in his skybox wringing his hands too. Like, oh, catch the goddamn ball. You know?

Totally. Exactly. But I do like Cleary. I think Cleary's a great guy. I think it's totally exactly so yeah but uh i do like cluey i think cluey's a great guy i think it's pretty brave and uh i don't know about sam just because i hope it all works out for him you know whether it was the right move or not yeah i just i just saw the thing on um the espies his whole story even beyond being an openly gay player his whole life was crazy did you guys see any of that i haven't no i didn't see no um he is one of seven kids and like most of his family like most of his siblings are either dead or in jail wow and like his father took off when he was super young one

of his uh one of his like older brothers was dealing drugs he's like if you tell anybody about this i'll kill you and like i mean just the at like the adversity of all that and then coming through and being the first openly gay player is jesus christ like talk about pressure there that's insane that's amazing though i i find sometimes with people like that it's like i think because of all the adversity like one more thing is not they're so strong already already. It's like, okay, let's just, of course we're going to do this. Yeah, like I was 12 and my brother said he was going to kill me. It's like, I think I can handle a few people yelling things

at me. A few million people. Yeah. Right, right. That's interesting though about the Jeff Fisher thing. I didn't know that's, it sounds like a WWE storyline, you know, like Vince McMahon's daughter. He's like, you will marry this person. That's interesting.

You know, and I'm a conspiracy theory guy, so anytime I see any kind of thing like that, I just automatically... Yeah. Right. And I'm not saying he was drafted just because of that, but it was interesting the way that him and the media coverage of it as it

went on, I think was very interesting. And I know that the media really does is controlled by the NFL, so everything they put out, the sports media, is pretty much in line with what the NFL wants. And for them being such a small mom-and-pop

organization, good for them. God bless it. That tiny little nonprofit. Yeah, exactly. So you mentioned that most players in the NFL kind of lean that Christian right way, and it feels the way that you're not really subscribing to that. Is that accurate? Yeah, I used to be, probably in college,

and then I kind of just dropped, really believed in a lot of stuff, just because if you look at it, I mean, I saw truth in a lot of different religions, and then I started looking at things from the scientific perspective, and from this and that, and really came up with, like, nobody knows shit.

Yeah. And, I mean, if you can't prove to me that this isn't just a dream, perspective and from this and that and really came up with like nobody knows shit yeah right yeah and i mean if you can't prove to me that this isn't just a dream that we keep waking up into and i'll listen but i think for the most part people aren't it's too scary to say like we just don't know the big questions you know they need to come up with a story or something you know how how was it having those thoughts and uh subscribing to what the majority of the locker room bought into? I mean, those end-of-game prayer circles or whatever, referencing God, how did that affect you? I mean, everyone has their own right to do their own thing. I definitely have my opinions, but I would never say something against someone who wants to pray

with someone else. You know what I mean? I don't have a problem with that. I don't think anybody... In the organizations I was at, which was Seattle and Denver, there was a lot of mutual respect, and I could say what I wanted and make it fair what they wanted, and it was usually fine. But most times I find you don't even

want to broach the subject because that guy's a Christian, so he's going to be a Christian. And if you're not, you're not. Sure. And that's kind of the end of it. You know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it seems pretty much in line with kind of what you did of just like, well, I'm just going to, you know, this is what my heart's telling me.

I'm going to follow that, not forcing it on anybody. You know, it's like, all right, that's the lane you want to go in. That's fine. Then I'll be over here. And we could still be friends, teammates. I'll hike you the ball. Exactly. I'll hike you the ball, Peyton Manning.

No, exactly. That's kind of how I want to approach it. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if there's any other way. Sure, sure. Yeah, you've been very generous with your time, man. Do you mind if we ask you a few more questions? Are you good? Like I told you, you've been very generous with your time, man. Do you mind if we ask you a few more questions? Are you good?

Like I told you, you guys already know my schedule. He's got a workout by 9 o'clock tomorrow. Yeah, yeah. I have my first improv class at 7.30 tomorrow. So if we could wrap this up. Bye then. Yeah, that'd be great. I got make-believe time coming up for about two hours.

So after that, I'll... Yeah, I got to throw around the sound ball and do some yes ands. And it's going to be pretty tough. So one or two more in the news of NFL right now. So we're in Baltimore, big Raven country. And so the thing we're talking about is Ray Rice with his suspension. Him only getting two games. And I want to hear your thoughts on that. Because I know when you got into that...

In your rookie year. The rookie year mistake. And getting four games. Double what Ray Rice is getting. Did you guys ever see the movie The Program? Did you ever see that? Yeah. Yeah.

It reminded me of The Program. Remember when he's Latimer? And he tried to rape that girl and they only gave him a four-game suspension. And he was wondering why it was even four games. Right. Yeah. Yeah. But the same kind of thing.

I don't know. I was shocked by that. same kind of thing, like, I don't know. I was shocked by that, the whole thing. I mean, I don't know the exact details. I just know that, you know, basically the elevator video is that he was, like, dragging her out unconscious or whatever. Yeah, I haven't seen it, but my dad described it to me. He's like, he just drops her. Like, she's unconscious, and he just, like, lifts her up to look

and see if she's, like, awake, and he realizes she's not, and he just lets her up to look and see if she's awake and he realizes she's not and he just lets her go. She just falls on her face just flat. Yeah, it's pretty uncomfortable. I don't know how you even punish... I wouldn't even know the frame on how to punish someone for that. You know what I mean?

As the NFL, I wouldn't know how you even... So my thing, I got suspended my rookie year for Adderall, and that's just... It's just set in stone. Like, if you do this, it's four-game suspension, done. Right? But I never, like... I don't know what the rulebook is for, like... Right, I see what you're...

I see what you're saying. You can't get good press from putting that in your rulebook. Like, guys, if you beat up your wife in an elevator, it's six games, okay? Like... You want to miss a third of the season elevator, it's six games, okay? You want to miss a third of the season? It would be more covered, right?

It would be something that would be addressed. Yeah. This is like, yeah, show me in the rule book where it says you can't beat your wife in the offseason. Show me in the rule book. A dog can play. Yeah, and kind of speak. Yeah, right. If Air Bud can play, I can beat my wife. Those are the rules.

It's not like pressing charges. So that's the other thing. Like, so I guess the... Yeah. You know, but if the police are involved, I don't know what... You know, I guess maybe the... I don't know.

I think that's really... It's a weird thing. As the NFL commissioner, how I would say, how do you punish this person? You know? Mm-hmm. Yeah, I mean, also, you know, I think they've

gotten married since that incident. Yeah, on purpose, so she couldn't testify against him. Oh my god, I would just kill to be at that wedding. I mean, like, the tension in that room, like... John, you would kill and then get, like, a three-game

suspension, so I don't know if that's... I don't know if that's the best idea uh it's not look it's not in the rule book but we got to do something you killed everybody at the wedding john we got to do something we got to make an example out of you you kill build uh ray rice's family we got to do something about that uh you might be able to get away with it. You never know. You're an athlete. Yeah, push it to the limits. Yeah, the thing to the Adderall thing was so crazy that it's filed as a performance-enhancing drug. It's like, well, I mean, if you really cleaned his locker, I guess. Yeah.

Yeah, that was four games? I had no clue. Four games because it's a performance-enhancing? I had no clue. Four games because it's a considered performance enhancing. I had no clue. And my rookie year, I held out for like a day or two, and that's when they went over all that stuff. And I had had Adderall. I had taken it before.

I'm a little ADD, if you haven't noticed. So it's like, yeah, I just kind of got popped for it, and then that was that. Right, right, yeah. The good thing was I blew my knee out right before the suspension. Perfect. So I kind of heard the suspension while my knee was blown out, yeah. Right.

Hey, God closes a door, he opens a window, right? Exactly, exactly. He's looking out for you. He might close the door on your knee, but he's going to open that window. You first. Okay. the door on your knee, but he's going to open that window. Yeah, but... I'm going to... You first. Okay. The phone

sucks because I can't see your mouth, so I was awkwardly waiting. I'm like, oh, shit. I think you can go first. But yeah, I think I was just going to say something stupid anyways. You'll fit right in with us on the podcast. The Adderall thing, I listened to stupid anyways. You'll fit right in with us on the podcast. The Adderall thing, I listened to

your interview you did with Pete Schrager the week after you quit the NFL and they were talking about Adderall after your interview. I forget who they had on afterwards. And it was funny just to hear these guys be like, Adderall, I don't even know what that is. Is that something the kids are doing?

That's literally a question like, I never did that in did that in college it's like yeah because it wasn't around when you were in college like i i feel like it's it's much more prevalent you know like i definitely remember doing that like well i'm just gonna knock out my homework uh for the next all nighter yeah for the next three days like i'm gonna have my homework done for a week and my room's gonna be immaculate like it's not i don't know I can't see it. Oh, God, yeah. I used to bang out full of papers on this shit. Right. Yeah.

I think that's how, like, 90% of kids get their school homes. Yeah, that's true. No, yeah. I mean, that's what makes diplomas is Adderall and Wikipedia, pretty much. You just mix those two and then you got a diploma. And you got a sociology degree. There you go., and then you got a diploma. And you got a sociology degree. There you go.

Yeah, exactly. So what were some of the weirdest stuff you saw in the NFL? Anything where you were like, what the hell is going on? Weird behavior with players, stuff on the field of trash talking any anything weird oh man um i don't know i think the whole for me the whole experience was really like a weird surreal experience you know what i mean because it's just uh i thought the whole i thought it was i don't know i kind of felt like all of it was weird. Plus, I'm weird, and my wife's kind of weird, so it kind of all falls in line with the tone of things.

I think nothing really in football, per se. It was playing like you would play. I think, yeah, I mean, that's a tough one. That's a really good one. Stumped him. We stumped him. Yeah, you definitely, that's a tough one. That's a really good one. Stumped him. We stumped him. Yeah, it took a little over. Yeah, you definitely stumped me. I would say it was more just an interesting, different kind of a life,

but nothing too weird or creepy. I went to Vegas. Vegas always gets weird. But other than that, it was pretty normal. Right, right. What about expectations, John? Like when you were just a college player and waiting to see if you'd be drafted. One, were you confident that you'd be picked?

And two, was it different that first rookie year, the first training camp, different than you expected? Yeah, I think I kind of knew I was going to get drafted just because of the projections, and I had a good idea that I would go around third round. And, you know, it was expectation-wise, I mean, the first camp is the most difficult. And mine, I came off of a lockout. So we had nothing, it was just like,

lockout's over, bam, you're in camp, you're playing pro football now. Your first game was like 10 days later. So that was like a really quick thing. The second camp was much easier, and I understood it because it's football. And that's kind of how it went. But I think it's just people have tolerance levels, and once you get used to them it's not that big of a deal you know yeah

I mean I'm sure yeah there must have been yeah there must have been an adjustment period there of like oh holy shit this whole thing I've been playing

or like building up to and playing for my whole life is the NFL and now I'm here and then all of a sudden it's like oh now it's just business as usual right

exactly that happens fast like you get into that it's just business as usual, right? Exactly. And that happens fast. Like, you get into that fast. You just have to because everything's going so fast. So it's like, you're pretty much a, they don't say this,

but you're pretty much a rookie and you started half the season. You know what I mean? Like, you're not really a rookie anymore. Oh, okay. So you, I'm sorry, the phone kind of got cut up there. What were you saying? They don't really a rookie anymore. Oh, okay. So I'm sorry. The phone kind of got cut up there.

What were you saying? They don't really say this when you start, but what happens? Oh, by the time you're at week eight as a rookie and you started eight games, you're pretty much not a rookie anymore. You should be considered like a vet. To me, that's how I feel because it's like I've had that experience. But it is an adjustment period. But, I mean, it was fun.

Right, right. So you're saying like just the level of play at college and how big everybody and how fast they are now is like not too far off from the NFL once you're kind of in that program, that top-tier Division I NCAA football. Yeah. I think the difference is like when you play in college, so maybe three out of the 12 games,

you're going to face a guy that's a real pro and a great player. Yeah. A real challenge. Everybody else is really good. In the NFL, it's like every week you're going to face somebody. Yeah, so every week you're going to face somebody that's just incredible.

Do you guys hear me? Yeah, you're starting to break up a little bit actually oh sorry about that yeah maybe it's my connection yeah well actually um i think i think we're alex do you have anything else to no i'm just i'm super excited to see what comes next yeah i mean thank you so much for talking to us, man. I mean, this is, like, I've been trying to reach out to more people on Twitter to do the podcast

and you were one of the guys to, like, quickly respond, like, yeah, what time? I'll do it.

And I was like, wow, that is so cool. So we really appreciate you taking the time out to talk to us, man. And we're excited for, I'm really excited

for this improv thing. Like, you got to keep us posted how the class is going. I will. Thank you guys. I really appreciate talking to you and thank you for having me on. Yeah. Uh, so yeah, this episode will be out probably not this Monday, but the Monday after. So I'll, uh, I'll send you the link to everything. It'll be on iTunes and Stitcher and all that stuff. Awesome. Sounds good. And you, you've got a futon in Baltimore whenever,

whenever you want to come by. Yeah. I'll probably be out when the episode breaks so that I can be on the next one. You know? Yeah. Yeah. We'll get you on the intro for it. You know,

you're like, we can talk, we can do like a director's commentary of this episode and just kind of break it down. And we don't have to hear any beeps. Yeah. Perfect. All right, man. Well we don't have to hear any beeps. Perfect. All right, man. Well, yeah, we'll be in touch.

I really appreciate it, man. All right, guys. Thank you. Oh, actually, sorry. Real quick, John, is there anything you want to plug, like your website or anything to look for? No, no, not really. I've just been plugging myself lately, so I think I'm good.

All right. Yeah, John Moffitt Industries. Twitter. Yeah, Twitter. Twitter, you're, what is it, Moffitt74? I've just been plugging myself lately So I think I'm good Twitter What is it, Moffat74? Yeah, Moffat74 M-O-F-F-I-T-7-4 Got it, got it In the next two weeks, if you guys figure out the name of the podcast We'll plug that too

I appreciate it, thanks guys Alright man, have a good one, John Alright, thanks John Alright, take care Bye What a sweetheart I appreciate it. Thanks, guys. All right, man. Have a good one, John. All right. Thanks, John. All right. Take care. Bye. Bye. What a sweetheart. Nice.

That was good. Alex, thanks for joining me here, sitting in the co-host chair. Yeah, that was fun. It was great. I love that guy. And yeah, it was your idea to get in touch with this guy. It was my idea. It was your idea. You give me ideas for guests all the time.

I think you told me to get in touch with John a long time ago. Yeah, maybe within a week or two of him retiring. Which it was last November 2013. Yeah, maybe around then. And then every few weeks I would check in and be like, hey, did you ever reach out to John? Yeah. No, I'll do it right now.

And then finally it it happened what happened what changed in you that you were like you know what um i think it's time uh honestly it was uh i i thought that he was that it was such a big story and he had so much going on that it just wouldn't happen but i still should have just reached out to him well and really that's all it took just kind of hitting him up and he was totally open to it yeah who would have guessed he was super open yeah comfortable of talking about everything yeah cool guy all right well alex this is uh this is signing off should we kiss well i mean more than we have been the whole time alex do you want to plug anything um

yeah i want to plug um do you want to exhale into the mic for nine minutes sure uh i'd love to plug um trader joe's okay um i think sometimes people think it's uh probably pricier than it is. Some great frozen products. And then I'd love to plug just casual hanging out. You know, just kind of come over whenever you want. Just in general, not with you. That whole Seinfeld thing where the guys would come up and come up and it was just kind of a spontaneous thing. So I recommend everybody, all the dig heads out there do it. Yeah.

Just in general, not with us. Just hang out with, with your friends. Yeah. And, uh, at sweep Alex on Twitter.

When's the last time you tweeted? Probably tell me about the John. Probably before I told you about this thing. well, chuckle storm is on Twitter. It is at chuckle storm USA. Yeah. And,

uh, I will plug this in the beginning of the episode, but chuckle storm is a monthly show Yeah. And I will plug this in the beginning of the episode, but ChuckleStorm is a monthly show, bi-monthly show that we do here in Baltimore. So we got a big show coming up in September. September, October. Might be part of Charm City Fringe. So look for that.

And just hang out with Alex. If you see him, hang out with him. Just show up at my house. Yeah. And I want to thank everybody. Crash on my futon. Yeah. I want to thank everybody for listening. If you're him, hang out with him. Just show up at my house. Yeah. And I want to thank everybody. Crash on my futon. Yeah. I want to thank everybody for listening.

If you're listening to the podcast for the first time, we really appreciate it. And we put out an episode every week, usually with comedians, musicians, or anybody that's really cool, somebody like John Moffat. And, yeah, thank you for listening. You can find all of our stuff at digressionsessions.com. We're on iTunes and Stitcher. We're part of a network, a podcast network called Thunder Grunt, which you can check out at thundergrunt.com. Alex is giving me the wrap-up.

But you've got to plug stuff. You've got to know. Now he's telling me to kill myself. And follow me on Twitter. I am at BetterRobotJosh. The podcast is at DigSeshPod. Yeah, thank you for listening. Follow me on Twitter, guys. I appreciate it.

We love you. Alright, bye everybody.