The Digression Sessions - Ep. 149 - Brad Williams! (@FunnyBrad)

Episode Date: February 2, 2015

Hola Digheads! Josh sits down in the green room of the Baltimore Comedy Factory with the cohost of the About Last Night podcast, actor, and killer comedian, Brad Williams! Josh was hosting the shows for Brad and he was nice enough to talk to Josh about improv, the life of a touring comedian, Shia Labeouf being very Shia Labeouf when Brad met him, and how to handle the late late show on a Saturday night / Sunday morning. And there are ads this week! Please do the Dig Sesh a solid and subscribe to and rate us on iTunes, or Stitcher! Say hi on Twitter and the Dig Sesh Facebook page. And check out the rest of the Thunder Grunt podcast network! Twitter & Instagram @BradWilliams – Brad Williams @JoshKuderna – Josh Kuderna @MikeMoranWould – Mike Moran @DigSeshPod – For Podcast Updates!    

Welcome to the Digression Sessions Podcast. Hey, everybody. I'm Josh Koderna. And I'm Mike Moran. And you're listening to the Digression Sessions Podcast, a Baltimore-based comedy talk show hosted by two young, handsome stand-up comedians slash improvisers. Join us every week as we journey through the world of comedy and the bizarreness of existence. As we interview local and non-local comedians, writers, musicians, and anyone else we find creative and interesting. Yes.

Who's the guest this week? Brad Williams. Brad Williams is the guest on this week's program. Comedian Brad Williams, who you can follow on Twitter. He is at FunnyBrad. You may know Brad if you remember the Carlos Mencius show. He was the little person on that show in many, many sketches. And I just worked with him this weekend here at the Baltimore Comedy Factory. And this podcast was recorded there right before the third show, before, during, and after the late, late show on

Saturday night. We started recording around 1130 p.m., got about five or six minutes in, and then the show was starting, so I had to rush on stage and start the show, and then during the feature, Alabama, during the middle act set, we did a little bit more of a podcast, and then I brought Brad up, and then we sort of wrapped it up at the end, and Brad was really cool, man. He was one of the nicest dudes I've Brad up and then we sort of wrapped it up at the end. And Brad was really cool, man. He was one of like the nicest dudes I've ever met. And so funny. He killed, killed. If a little person is doing a lap dance to Lady Gaga's poker face, it's over. It's over in Baltimore. There's no competing with that. But beyond that, Brad is a great

performer, hilarious dude. And yeah, it was very awesome to talk to him about his start a little bit, talk about improv, which I'm into and do, of course. And so it was cool to hear that he had some improv background and improv DNA as well., now I'm distracted cause I'm watching the final two minutes of the Superbowl professional podcast, rambling podcast. But anyway, uh, Brad was really cool, man. He, um, we didn't talk about it on the podcast, but, uh, he mentioned, uh, backstage, uh, about like, um, his dad was, uh, kind of hard on him as a kid, not hard, but basically would kind of joke around with him and, uh, kind of bust his balls as a kid. Not hard, but basically would kind of joke around with him and kind of bust his balls a little bit, even before he went to kindergarten. And he was

kind of preparing him for what other kids were going to say, how society was going to see him. And he was basically treated normally, like just a normal kid, but he was able to dish it out. He was able to joke around and so like he said the first day of kindergarten i think he made two kids cry that tried to make fun of him so it's sort of like going to prison and just punching the biggest guy right in the mouth so and ever since then brad's been really funny and it was actually carlos mencia that kind of put him on the map and um yeah ever since then he's just been a road comic, just killing it. I think last year he was on the road 40 weeks a year or something. And could not have been a nicer dude, man.

Told me all about comedy, gave me insights, and was willing to talk about whatever. So big ups to him for doing the podcast. Hope you guys enjoy it if this is your first time listening. And, yeah, it was just a great talk, man. Good dude. And, yeah, let me plug a couple things here. Josh Coderna here, of course, guys. Sorry for the delay again in episodes.

But, hey, we try. We try, you know. They say consistency is key with a podcast. But I don't know about that. I don't know about that. Let's see here. Follow me on Twitter. I am at Josh Coderna.

Also at Josh Coderna on Instagram. I got some live shows this week. This Wednesday is Chuckle Storm in Baltimore, and that is a live stand-up sketch and talk show, basically, where we have characters, and it's a good time, and I shoot a glitter gun. So that's going to be at the Auto Bar this Wednesday, September. Wow. It's going to be this Wednesday, February 4th at the Auto Bar, 8 p.m. Got a great lineup. Come out to that. It's always a good time. And then on Friday the 6th, I will be doing a stand-up at the Avalon Theater in Easton. Come out to that. I think it's going to sell out pretty quick. Very excited for that. Family's coming out to the show, so that should

be fun for them to see my dick jokes. And Russell Wilson just threw an incomplete pass. God damn it. And I got $10 on the game with my girlfriend's dad. So he took the Patriots. And need these $10, folks. And my partner in crime, Mr. Mike Moran, who is not present on this episode because we recorded this, you know, like Saturday into Sunday, Saturday night into Sunday morning. Mike Moran, you can follow on Twitter. He is at Mike Moran Wood, as in what would Jesus do? And you can see him this Saturday, February 7th at the Mercury Theater in Baltimore. He'll be performing improv with his improv troupe Pop 6, and that'll be at the Mercury Theater, like I said, 8 p.m. this Saturday, February 7th. You can go to digressionsessions.com for all past and future and present episodes. We're on iTunes. We're on Stitcher. We got a lovely, lovely podcast network here in Baltimore called

the Thundergrunt Network. Check that out, thundergrunt.com. I think that's it as far as plugs. Now, I'm going to enjoy watching the final minute of the Super Bowl. Maybe, I think. Oh, damn it. Another drop pass. Oh, he caught it.

What? No. Holy shit. All right, for those listening, a timestamp. This dude, Curse, just caught the ball with about a minute and six seconds left. Looked incomplete, and then he caught it on the ground. Holy shit! I need these $10.

Papa needs $10. I might be really, really excited or really bummed out. Holy shit! How did he catch that? Jesus Christ. Oh, wow. All right, Well, this is the end of this professional intro. We're about six minutes into this thing here because I'm watching TV, like all professional broadcasters do. I'm sure it's what Maren's doing right now, too.

And shout out to Brad. We got some sponsors on this episode. And Brad was nice enough to do all of our live reads for all of our great sponsors. So check all that out. Thank you guys for listening. As always, we really appreciate it. Check us out. Get into some past episodes. We've had some great guests like Joe DeRosa, Patton Oswalt, really good people, and this was awesome.

Awesome, awesome interview. I feel like I end them all. This was awesome. This is really awesome. But it was. Brad was such a cool dude, very open, sweet guy. So get into I end them all. This was awesome. This is really awesome. But it was. Brad was such a cool dude. Very open, sweet guy. So get into it.

Hope you enjoy the episode. Find us online. Comments. What do you like about the episode? What do you want to change? Do you enjoy it? Talk to us. Talk to us on Facebook.

Go to the Digression Sessions Facebook page. Get into it. All right? Dig it, if you will. Ha ha. All right. I'm going to watch the rest of the super bowl all right bye guys no no god damn it oh just saw the interception what the hell how can you throw the ball at the goddamn one yard line Marshawn Lynch you're at the one yard line give fucking beast mode the ball oh god damn it what What was that? Let's go to happier times.

Let's talk to Brad. Let's have a good time now. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. You know how it works. Hello. Testing. All right.

Brad Williams. I'll do the intro later. You know, this is the BS. Kind of get into it. Okay. So do you start off with a theme song or do you do the Marc Maron thing where you rant for a little bit? Yeah.

I talk about my cats for a while. Oh, wow. Okay. So you really do the Marc Maron thing. How Brad and I haven't gotten along for a long time, but I think my cats for a while and oh wow okay so you really do the mark maron thing brad and i haven't gotten along for a long time but i think we ironed it out right exactly yeah we we because we had because we had a good relationship yeah we had we had a good one and it it was it was wounded and now i've felt we've healed these wounds sorry i'm that's a horrible mark maron it's a fucking terrible Marc Maron. Sorry for the listeners.

I've just gone off stage from a second show, and now I have a third show to get ready for. Yes. And the fans have been buying me drinks for the first two shows, so I'm slightly intoxicated. Just a little bit. Mm-hmm. But I'm still having a good time.

Yeah, you're killing it out there, man. Just to give people an idea, the type of stuff that uh brad williams receives on stage you had some some shots came up and then there's some cupcakes came up as well so they brought that back it's like your spoils of war you got these tiny jim beam bottles and like four cupcakes last night you got strawberries like right sarok strawberries dude I started telling people on my podcast. My podcast called About Last Night. I'll get the plug out of the way. Great podcast. My podcast, I started telling people how I love when people bring me food and snacks and stuff like that from the show.

And now people start doing it. They actually do it. And I love red velvet. I'm obsessed with it. Interesting. And people bring me red velvet stuff. Yeah. They bring me little velvet stuff yeah they bring

me little bottles of jim beam and like i like not little bottles how you guys traditionally think of it's little bottles like the bottles they hand you when you're on a flight yeah like just like the one travel size yes tiny thing and for me that's perfect it's just enough to get me fucked up right right yeah no i you were uh gracious enough to be taking the shots on stage it's just enough to get me fucked up right right yeah no i you were uh gracious enough to be taking the shots on stage it's like dude three shows right i'm just hosting and i'm like can i have a cup of tea you're like shots i'll have tea and maybe a coconut water but not too much caffeine i don't want to get jittery just like something with a lot of potassium yeah flush the system for the three shows dude yeah my philosophy now doing the three shows the baltimore

comedy factory yeah is to um get just as fucked up as the audience because the last time i did this third show yeah late show i did it sober and i go and i came off stage so mad because i cared and i was trying and i was like and the audience audience didn't care. It's not a real show. It's a different dynamic. Right. There was a guy, the last time I did the third show at the Baltimore Comedy Factory, there was a guy that was literally doing the Dougie on the side of the stage and he was doing it the entire show.

That's amazing. And I would insult him and I would smack him down and make the audience cheer and clap and he wasn't affected. He's unflappable. He just kept doing the Dougie. It was some weird... That's insane. Yeah. That's insane.

You really just could not face him at all. So I didn't know what to do at that point. So I just kept doing my act. He just kept doing the Dougie. And I kind of kept referring to him. Instead of a rim shot, I would just stare at him, and he would still be dancing. He danced for like 35 minutes.

So just the whole time, he was just steady. Yeah. That's amazing. It's almost like Kid Rock used to have strippers perform on stage, but you got a random drunk dude doing the Dougie. I got black guys doing the Dougie, which I think, I mean, I kind of prefer over the strippers. Because if people look and they see strippers, they're only going to look at the strippers and hope for a nip slip.

They see a black guy doing the Dougie. It's kind of like a nice commercial break. Yeah. You're kind of just looking like, and now a black guy doing the Dougie. And you just watch that and you're like, this is entertaining. Yeah. You grab a drink, eat a cupcake. Sure.

Yeah. Come back to my jokes whenever. I hope he's here tonight. I hope he was like a big fan and then he's just ready to dougie it up. You know what? He'd be like my version of, remember in Chappelle's show, every sketch there was a black guy. Oh, doing the robot. Yeah, doing the robot.

And that would be my version. And like every show I had, it was just a black guy on the side of the stage doing the d yeah doing the robot and that would be my version and like every show idea was just a black guy on the side of the stage doing the dougie right you just have a killer line and he just comes out like it's the dude it's that guy the punctuation i would love that i would love to have something at my show to where people are like is he gonna do it yeah do it and then when like a catchphrase it. And then when, like a catchphrase, some comics hate when they get a catchphrase.

I know Chappelle hated it. Oh, sure. When he walked out on stage and everyone just started chanting, Bitch. Yeah, I'm a James bitch. Or like, or like,

I've talked to Larry the Cable guy and he does not like the whole Gator Dunn thing. I'm sure he doesn't. He hates it privately, but he loves it publicly. I would just love it. I'm like, like are you kidding me there's something i can stop and say at any point in my show yeah and the young and the audience is going to explode yeah that's gonna be fucking great are

we starting the show now yeah we're starting the show so we'll be right back we'll be right back here's a commercial break stamps.com everybody uh are are you tired of going to the post office stamps.com like all the all with no lines no hassle the post office the post office comes to you just stamps.com enter enter the promo code or stamps.com enter the promo code what's the name of this podcast what kind of fucked up name is that um go to stamps.com and enter the promo code DS. That's the promo code DS and get a 10% discount. Stamps.com. Now back to the show.

Oh, wait. Now we got to go do an actual stand-up comedy show, but we'll be right back. We'll be right back. All right. Black man just did the Dougie, and we're back. Just had to rip it for those 18 people out there. Yeah. Here's the thing.

This is the late show for the Baltimore Comedy Factory. There is 18 to 22 people in there. Yeah. And the thing is, for 18 and 22 people, you can't take it too seriously. You can't be like, they didn't laugh. That's a reflection of my material. No, no, no. It's like, no no the show's supposed to start at 11 30 it started closer to uh 11 50 they're they're already tired there's 18 of them you're not gonna get out there to you're like it's just not gonna happen oh yeah and you can hear each individual laugh like you

can see everybody you know you're like, so 17 of you liked that joke. Yeah. Two of you did not. Okay, that's all right. That's all right. I'll try to get you to hot top on board. No, I felt fine about that set. It's just survival.

It is what it is. I'm probably going to go out there and literally read my set. And when I say read my set, I just mean go over the lines. Not really like... Work on your script. Nah. Run it. Run it.

Actively take notes while you're out there. Sure. Just little mental things. Yeah, I should trim that up a little bit. Guys, bear with me one sec. Yeah, this is one of the things that makes the Baltimore Comedy Factory special. It's the 1130 show. For those listening at home, Brad has a gun in his mouth, but we're going to try to work

through it. So, Brad, where did you start comedy? I started comedy where I grew up in Southern California, Orange County. Let me just say, is there anything you want to talk about? No, I'm just kidding. It's so funny. And that's an inside joke for us but let me uh let's let the listener in uh there was an interview that i did before uh my

shows my three shows and the guy started off the interview saying if there's is there anything you want to talk about which is just i mean i get it but at the same time it's just like dude this is your interview man yeah you want because if interview, man. Whatever you want. Because if you say, is there anything you want to talk about, I'm going to vent my frustrations for about an hour and a half on how the Broncos gave up against the damn Colts. And my team didn't do so well this year. Or maybe about how the Lakers are struggling and why I was actually glad that Kobe went out because now we can tank and hopefully get a high draft pick. That's what I'll talk to you about. If there's anything you want to talk about,

I'll talk about titties for four hours. Great. I don't know if that's going to be so great for his disability monthly interview, and that's literally what it was for. It was for some website, the people with disabilities doing prominent things, and he was blind,

which sucked because uh the guy like the guy walked him back here and then like left him alone in the room with me to do the interview so we started bumping into a bunch of stuff and like i'm not used to being with the blind person so i'm i'm probably being doing that thing that people sometimes do with me where they're ultra politically correct, where they're just like, do you need help sitting down? Do you know where the doorknob is? Do you need me to fetch?

Can you hear me? I can. I'm going to talk slowly. It's like I'm blind. I'm not deaf, asshole. So, yeah, I probably embarrassed myself. Nothing stops him from loving titties in the Lakers. No, I don't know.

It's always weird when you do one of these interviews that's themed to a certain thing. He's like disability monthly. So it's like, I'm like, okay, well, I got to talk about overcoming adversity and people staring at me as a kid i'd like and i i've had to do that before where like some theme in interviews me and i gotta sort of tailor like do you know how hard it is to make dwarf jokes when you're talking a cat fancy magazine it's so difficult there's not that many dwarf cats um they don't really know congrats on the cat fancy gig that's good man that's high power seth rogan watch the fuck out i'm coming up i'm gonna start making my own damn movie soon uh-huh uh but yeah so that was it was definitely interesting to do that kind of interview and

yeah i say yes to everything and that's that's yeah i didn't that's why i didn't ask i was gonna ask and then i was like well i'm the host i don't know. I never know what, like, comedians, like, headliners are thinking, where it's like, excuse me, sir, would you mind? Well, my philosophy is I'm bored. When I go to cities, I just sit in a hotel room and watch a ton of Netflix and jerk off at least four times. High five. Don't touch that hand.

So when someone asks me to do their podcast, I'm like, yes, I'll absolutely do it. Gives you me to do the podcast, their podcast, I'm like, yes, I'll absolutely do it. So I gives you something to do. Yeah. I've appeared on so many obscure, like listenerships of 15 to 17 people about the crowd that I have in my audience right now. Uh, and I've, I've appeared on those podcasts, but it's always fun. It's just conversations like really you're too busy on your road gig to sit down and have a conversation for an hour? Yeah. Dick.

I know. Talking to you, Rita Rudner. You ask her. You fucking asshole. I know. You say one thing about Rita Rudner. What a dick. Such a diva.

Just absolute trash. And I don't care. I know she listens, and I don't even care. Okay. No. Well, that's the thing too if you put the person in the position because you know they're not doing anything if they're like i'm busy it's like oh he's just lying yeah it's like really you're you're you're busy downloading uh a walk amongst the tombstones on itunes a movie that you don't even want to see but because you're bored out of your mind and masturbated to the point where your dick is

bleeding. I saw one of those movies the other day. It was called The Drop. It was with James Gandolfini and Matt Hardy. Tom Hardy. Tom Hardy. Matt Hardy. Yeah. One of the Hardy boys from WWE. It would be a much better movie.

Not Jeff. Matt. Why are you doing the fucking moonsault? They couldn't afford Jeff, so they went with Matt. But yeah, Tom Hardy. And it got such rave reviews, so I was looking at it like, this is going to be sweet. And then I think they just gave it rave reviews because it's like Gandolfini's last movie.

So they're like, this is a stellar performance. No, the movie sucks. Really? Yeah, I watched the trailer and I was like, this kind of looks like more of the same. Especially for him. He's like, hey, I'm a washed up wise guy. Yeah. And he's not, like, I wish he was a washed up wise guy in the movie.

Oh, he's just kind of like a scrub. Right. I don't know what got these guys to do this movie. Tom Hardy does an awful New York accent. Way too strong. Like, yo, I'm going to need my dog, Rocko. You know? Oh!

Yeah, he's basically doing dice. Yeah. Get the dog food. Yeah. And so it just, I felt bad because I watched it on a plane. I was totally excited to see it. Yeah. My flight home, I believe I downloaded Fury, the tank movie.

Yeah, that seems like a solid B. Like you know what you're getting. Yeah. No surprises. It's going to be Brad Pitt, and he's going to be in a tank, and some shit's going to blow up. I'm all right with that. It also stars Shia LaBeouf, who I met recently.

How was that? It was awesome. It was the most Shia LaBeouf meeting that you could ever have. He did not disappoint. He did not disappoint. Some people, like, you meet and you're like, oh, crazy is an act for you. No. Him, it's like, no, oh, you're crazy.

Yeah. I saw him on Jimmy Kimmel. When did he become, like, a southern gentleman? Like, did he have, like, a southern accent? Don't know. Because he was just like, yeah, man, what I was doing out there. Like, whoa, what like a southern accent don't know because he was just like yeah man what i was doing out and you're like whoa what's who is this don't know um i was i was shooting this tv show in new york and i came downstairs hulu show right uh hulu show called deadbeat yeah and what's happening out there oh just talking to people that's the thing when

there's 19 people in the audience you you can have individual conversations with everybody. You hear everything out there. So I'm at the hotel. I just got the mod sticks. I got downstairs to eat breakfast at this hotel, and I see Shia LaBeouf just in the lobby having a conversation with a dude. And I'm like, wow, that's pretty cool.

He's in New York. He's doing his thing. I don't want to bug him. So I eat my breakfast breakfast and when I come out about an hour later, he's still at this couch in the lobby having a conversation. I go, alright, that's kind of cool. I go upstairs. I shower. I get ready.

I come back downstairs about maybe two hours later. He's in the same chair still having a conversation. At this point, I'm like, well, now I gotta get a picture. So I get the picture and I go up up to him i say hey man uh do you mind if i take a picture with you he says no but he has an eyebrow piercing and he's like i can't let anyone know i have an eyebrow piercing so we have to do this weird thing where i have to be in an angle and i said all right that's fine we'll put you at an angle and he goes tell you what we'll do we'll bring we'll like fake like we're about to kiss but we're not about to kiss

and i i come from improv kind of so i'm like yes and so like i have to always agree so i'm like okay we're gonna do something we're about to kiss so we took this picture it's on my instagram you can see it at brad williams comic yeah and uh we're literally like leaning in like we're about to kiss. And you can't see that he has an eyebrow piercing. Wow. He was totally into it. And he was talking throughout the picture like just act as sexy as possible. Act sexy.

And I'm just like sitting there like, okay. Yes, sir. Yes, I will buff. I'll act sexy for you. And it was just ridiculous. And he started talking to me about the – I wasn't telling him I was a comedian. He started talking to me about the wasn't told him i was a comedian he started talking to me about the comedic process no boy it was just weird man but he like he was nice yeah but weird and uh yeah now um i started like now that you meet someone you watch

a few things that they've done now i'm gonna watch fury i love the youtube video of actual cannibal shia shia labeouf have you seen that one no this dude wrote this amazing song about being lost in the forest and meeting shia labeouf and shot and shia labeouf starts to eat him what like he's a cannibal uh-huh and it's this it's the craziest youtube video it's awesome you just have to see it. All right. Yeah, I'll check that out. Yeah, so I saw that that he did.

He did some music video recently from Sia where he's like half molesting an eight-year-old. I didn't see it, but yeah, I saw the headline. It's like, racy video from Shia LaBeouf. I watched it. It wasn't that racy. Yeah. It's a girl. They're doing an interpretive dance.

Yeah, and it's not sexual at all. That's a girl. They're doing an interpretive dance. Yeah, and it's not sexual at all. That's the problem. I mean, I think that tells you more about the people that are watching it, where they see a guy in his probably late 20s dancing with an 8-year-old girl, and they're not doing sexual things. They're not. Yeah. And then they immediately go, oh, he's molesting her.

Yeah, we all want to have sex with eight-year-olds. This guy is clearly acting on it. Obviously, we would love to all be stuck in a cage with an eight-year-old in a leotard and boning her. Right? Am I right, people? That's what we all feel. We're only human. Yeah.

It's like the people that, like, okay, Chick the what was the announcer for the lakers one of the best basketball announcers of all time invented the term slam dunk and he got in trouble and he's like he did it till he died like he did it till he was like 78 yeah and he got in trouble when he was like 76 years old because this one guy dunked a ball and he was hanging on the rim with one arm. Oh, boy. And Chick Hearn said, he's hanging on the rim like a monkey. And listen, he was, okay? Being black had nothing to do with it. It could have been Jeremy Lin, and it would have been the same thing.

People came after him like, Chick Hearn is a racist. It's like, no, he's not racist. You're racist you you you say well he obviously said that because he's black no he didn't even think that he had one arm on the side of the rim and was literally swinging back and forth right like and who else does that a fucking monkey all right it's not a racial thing so shut up people see things that aren't there uh you know it's just that that whole thing bugs me but that's a whole nother podcast that's a whole nother conversation that's not a conversation that i'm willing to have before i'm about to go on stage for 19 people at the 11 30 comedy show at the baltimore comedy factory no it is now past midnight so the show

that you're doing tonight is now officially tomorrow. This is now the Sunday show. This is the Sunday show, man. You made it. And Sunday shows usually suck. So this is going to be perfect. That's true. Yeah. So they kept with the theme.

Yeah. But yeah, you have been, like, just to give people an idea, like, you've been killing it this weekend. Thank you, man. Not to blow too much smoke up your ass. That's all right. Do it now before i go out and do stand up for 19 people get you hyped up and my ego is gonna be crushed i'm going to cry in my

hotel room tonight that's that's that's a given you have two great sets than the one that's like kind of eh yeah man i fucking suck yeah and for 19 people you almost it's almost impossible to have a great set for 19 people right you're gonna do a lot of lap dances to win these people a lot of lap dances i'm gonna lap dance every single person in that audience i have time yeah that's it you'd probably make it to the end like make it all the way around the room like that's the show 20 minutes of stand-up and then 25 minutes of lap dances that's pretty much what i'm gonna do uh the uh but the the lap dance is like it's just your secret weapon like you've been killing and then like, like, I literally recorded some, like, just audio from it. And, like, I think the ground is shaking a little bit.

But you're like, oh, my God. It's kind of like the Marshawn Lynch run that, like, registered on the Richter scale. Like, people just go nuts. Well, the thing is, is I used to do it. What I do is at the end of my shows sometimes is i give a woman a lap dance and i used to do it because i was a shitty comedian and i would do horrible on stage and then i would give a woman a lap dance and everyone would love me this guy's like this guy this guy's great yeah and so that was like my secret weapon to have

people no matter what i did on stage be like he's he's very, that dude was funny. I wasn't. But then I got funny. And so now I make them laugh for a long time. And I still do the lap dance. And now it's just, it's not fair. Yeah. Well, that is a funny thing, too. I think, God, you had some line last night

that just like killed me. I'm like, I don't know how I'm going to follow that. And it's like, yeah, you do. Yeah, I do. Yeah, I do. I got something. Yeah, it is a great thing. Yeah, you don't't need to do it but it's just damn just puts it over the top and i stopped doing it but now i i just bust it out every now and then when there's a

crowd where i feel like we're we're having a great time and this is just gonna blow the roof off the joint or um i do it it's it's two extremes, if it's just like the best set ever, and I just want to put that cherry on top. Just fucking go for it. Yeah, and the other one is if it's the worst set ever, and I still want to save myself and still make people walk out of here going, we saw Brad Williams and it was a great show.

Right. So those are the only times that I really do it. Well, I remember what it was last night. It wasn't a line. It was that you brought a woman on stage and had her bent over. Yep. I simulated doggy style sex with a woman on stage. Your prowess.

Yes. In front of her boyfriend. They were on a first date. Their first date. You're like, let me give them something magical. Well, that's what I did. Because every couple you meet that's married has a crazy first date story. You tell it this time, honey.

No, you tell it. Okay. Yeah, it's like, well, I was walking. I was lost in the desert, and all of a sudden, this woman, she was skydiving. She shoot game off course. The winds kicked up, and she landed on me in the middle of the desert. We knew. It's some crazy shit like that.

Yeah. So I know that if I give the date a lap dance on the first date. Oh, it's some crazy shit like that yeah so i know that if i give the date of lap dance on the first date oh it's over they're they're gonna have 32 grandchildren they have to yeah like starting the next day they they have to stay together just so they can tell that story yeah i'm their wedding toast right right yeah like when they get to fight you're like you're lucky we have a great fucking origin story you fucking asshole asshole. Can't leave you. God, I hope that actually does happen. That'd be great.

You said you're an improv guy? Well, when I started in high school, I was on this improv comedy team. Oh, that's awesome. And so I did long form improv. That's great, man. It was a lot of fun. I did that before I did stand up. I started stand up when I was 19.

Oh, that's cool. And it was great great and i got the best piece of advice not just for improv but for life from an from an improv coach yes and no no even better oh it this is gonna sound the most like morbid advice ever i like how you just said no to me too right there yeah you mean was yes and no. But? But? Yeah. I don't yes and. I know but.

Yeah. So the advice was, and get ready for this, it's going to help you in your life, okay? Here's the advice. Nobody cares about you. Like I said, it sounds morbid. Yeah. But it meant to be an improv thing like don't worry about what the audience thinks, if they think you're funny or not. They're too busy going, oh my God, they're improv-ing on stage.

They have no script. I could never do that. And so no matter what, they're going to be in awe of you. And that's what it was designed to do. But really, if you think about it, nobody cares about you is such a great thing because yeah at the end of the day we come home and we're all stressed out like oh my god so and so saw me today and i was wearing this and they probably thought that i was wearing this because i was insulting them because i knew that i saw them wear this the other the other week or they weren't

when they wore an opposite color or so until it worked doesn't like me because i stopped putting hearts on my eyes when i signed my signatures and they probably noticed that i'm like pissed at them yes they probably think i'm pissed at them and no nobody cares nobody cares about you yeah they're all doing their own shit and thinking about their own shit they're up in their head about all their other shit yes so nobody cares stop thinking that everything revolves, everyone cares, everything's dramatic. Yeah. Right now, you could do something insanely stupid,

get on the news, and in two days, no one will know because it's a 24-hour news cycle now and people just go on to the next thing. Yeah. It's crazy. Nobody cares about you people.

No. So if you take anything from this podcast, nobody cares about you. Brad Williams and the Dalai Lama, I think both said both said those things i'm pretty sure yeah uh that's cool you have an improv background because that's that's where i started i still do improv with the baltimore improv group nice yeah i love it man it's so much fun i think they're good like root muscles to have for stand-up because people always like well which one do you like more i'm like they're both great i think they reinforce each other yeah as far as like comedy muscles go yeah well stand-up

helps in that um certain situations can arise in an improv scene where it allows you if you if you're good at stand-up you know what a joke sounds like you know rhythm you know comedy timing right and it can really enhance that improv obviously helps stand helps stand up because sometimes when it breaks down and you go, well, my jokes aren't working. It's probably going to happen to me in about five minutes. So I'm going to have to just talk to these people. This person just told me to fuck off, but I'm going to keep going. I'm going to say my written jokes. I'm going to say yes and.

I'm going to say yes, I will fuck off and I will die. Thank you. Fantastic. Thank you. Good night, will die thank you fantastic thank you good night baltimore thank you thank you so uh they're they're they're definitely both skills that help each other yeah and on top of that they're just fun to do yeah and now i didn't realize this till just now um i've made my mother faint twice in her life. No shit. Once was doing stand-up, and the other was doing improv. During stand-up, it was when I did a sex joke that she did not know that I was going to do. And then I did it, and she fainted in the audience. Wow.

And you sort of thud, and people gasping. Yeah. I was like, what's going on over there? And somebody yelled out, your mom fainted. Okay. Wow. And you sort of thud and people gasping. Yeah. I was like, what's going on over there? And somebody yelled out, your mom fainted. Okay. Oh. Someone give her some fucking water. That was frightening.

Yeah. And sorry, just real quick. Like you've been doing a joke that involves her this weekend. And like you say she's kind of southern and proper. So this picture is like, oh me, oh my. Yeah. Oh my goodness i got i've got the vapors what has my only son done to me yeah exactly and that's how she talks and uh

so yeah she fainted when i told this sex show and the only other time she fainted in her life was when i was doing this improv scene with a buddy of mine in high school and uh he was training to become a professional wrestler and during this improv scene he gave me a pile driver oh and i acted like it killed me right i i bounced up land on my back and were still and my mom thought she had just witnessed her son die right right she fainted oh my god and then the whole thing the the the game that was going on in the scene is this game called forward reverse where you're some at some point someone yells out oh we gotta go oh shit um legalzoom.com, everybody. Legalzoom.

Yeah, one day you're going to die. It's going to suck. But do you really want to have your family members live out there without any money? No, you want to make sure they're taken care of. So go to Legalzoom.com. Get together a will. I got to go on stage right now. I can't do these fake ads anymore.

Thanks. I'm Brad Alright Brad This is it This is the quick episode You're trying to get paid You're trying to get out of here You just rocked it for those people In the third show Third show

It was actually a lot more fun Than I thought it was going to be. Yeah, you killed it, man. And the crowd was laughing. They were having a good time. We had one upset Middle Eastern man. Yes. Well, he was breaking up with his girlfriend in the middle of my show, to be honest. Yeah, I didn't know how much of that.

I was backstage, and I was like, whoa, what the fuck's happening? Because you're like, whoa whoa are you guys breaking up which i i i felt like a dick like right after i said it because i felt like the guy that like when the dude is trying to propose just stops and goes wait are you proposing right now like wait what are you doing yeah yeah yeah right right but at the same time they weren weren't, like, fighting loud. But the problem is, and I said this on stage, like, when there's only 22 people in the audience and you start talking. I know what's going on. Everyone can hear.

Yeah. So it sounded like they were being kind of aggressive. And I could tell that the woman was not exactly happy. So I just want to be like, are you guys breaking up? And I said that. And that and then hey it worked uh after that they shut up and then i could have sworn that the dude yelled out because i asked him like what kind of indian are you because he was obviously indian and he and i i could have sworn he said pakistan and then i said oh you're from pakistan and then he went fuck you i'm not

from pakistan like wait what's like what? Yeah, he was calling you a motherfucker. And you're like, well, where did I hear? He's like, I don't know, motherfucker, from your fucking comedy bullshit. Yeah, from your fucking comedy brain. And I'm like, yes. And everyone laughed. So I did my job. Yeah.

Congratulations. So, yeah, that was kind of interesting. But overall, fun time. Hey, someone just got handed a check. Hey, now. Not me. Not me. Not me. I don't get paid.

I work for free. Turns out that Pakistan guy is the owner of the club. Damn it. I'm going to get home, and my internet connection is going to suck. He's going to solve that problem. You're going to have to wait forever. Yeah. Oh, well.

You handled that shit really well, though, man. It was fun. It's a goofy thing it was and uh it was so great that there was that one black lady in the audience that i made her laugh so hard that she got up out of her chair and like ran around the room yeah that was the funniest and it was right after i did the joke where i talk about how black people laugh at their entire body yeah and god she lived up to it oh no that's that's the jackpot as far as black audience you want the person running up and down

the aisles going nuts i got the holy ghost oh you hit that button it was so great that that that makes you so happy like white white people laugh politely until the end of the show and then they'll give you a standing ovation which is awesome right but then the black people they let you know throughout it's that constant game you know exactly where you stand with them yes and uh i love that exactly yeah it was just a fun thing i did a lot of old stuff and uh that i knew would work with that sort of audience because when i came up and I started doing comedy, we don't start doing packed clubs and sold-out theaters. When you start, it's in bars that have 18, 19 people in it.

And they'd rather watch the game. Right. So you're developing material that works for those kinds of audiences. So I went back to a couple of those jokes, and they worked out well well so it was a lot of fun good man it was a pleasure working with you this weekend you had you had the tough spot of having to open up the show and uh that's always there's a reason they call it taking the bullet because people are getting settled looking at the menu they're figuring out who's sitting

with who yeah do you want to pay for drinks? Should we split fries? Split drinks. What's happening? And all while you're trying to get them into that comedy rhythm. And it's almost like as a host, you can tell how good your set was. Not by how they applaud for you. But if the feature act's first joke hits, you're like, oh, good. They're ready. They're ready. They're primed.

I prepared them for comedy. Right. And then we had a feature act named Alabama. Do you know this guy? You know this Alabama fella? Say hello. Hey, everybody. That's Alabama.

In fact, that's his catchphrase. He sells it on T-shirts after the show. Hey, everybody. Yeah, he says the hey, and then he points the mic at the audience, and they go, everybody. Yeah, it's so popular here. You almost said that like Dean Martin. Like, hey, everybody. Yeah, he says the hey, and then he points the mic at the audience, and they go, everybody. Yeah, it's so popular here. You almost said that like Dean Martin, like, hey, everybody. I know. We're going to settle on in.

Your man Dino is going to sing you a song. Your good buddy Alabama. Yeah, good buddy Alabama. Just saying hello out there in podcast land. How are we? How are we? So, yeah, and the first joke that Alabama did every set did well. So that's a compliment to you as a host.

Well, thank you very much. It has nothing to do with Alabama being funny. Being a killer in his own right. Yeah. Yeah, I go out in the audience and be like, I set that up. That was me. That was me. That was all me.

As the host, you're kind of like the blocker for the running back. Like you don't get the credit. No. But it can't happen without you right and rarely is somebody coming to the uh coming to the uh the game wearing an offensive lineman jersey like right number 99 is my favorite like nobody gives a shit they open up the hole like they they don't do that no the running back gets all the credit no no you see look garrett blunt what a powerful great running back but he wouldn't. No, no. You see LeGarrette Blount? What a powerful, great running back.

But he wouldn't have done it without. Exactly. He's running through holes the size of garage doors. It's easy, okay? So he's doing all right. So that was you tonight. You were the old lineman who pulled around. Oh, thank you, guys.

Thank you. And opened up that hole, okay? So good job, which is a valuable thing to do if you're an offensive lineman or a porn actor. You always want to open up that hole. Anytime somebody says good job opening up that hole, that makes me feel good. I know I did my job.

That was great. That was fantastic, man. So yeah, unfortunately we've got to wrap this thing up. Do you want to do a quick little lightning round? Yeah, lightning round. Okay, so first time you started, because I wanted to ask you about this because you're improv background. There's the

famous story that you're at a Carlos Mencia show. He is making midget jokes and then everybody's uncomfortable around you because they see it's you and he's like, hey, what's going on here? And then he calls you up on stage and he's kind of riffing a little bit and you're just throwing it right back at him. Yeah.

And that made the audience laugh. And when I heard the audience laugh for the first time, I was like, oh, I like this. I'm like, ooh. Yeah. And I was 19. Had you been doing improv at the time? Just like the high school stuff. But you were always a funny dude, but you knew kind of like the rhythms of it, so you

could hang when he was kind of and so then when i got on stage and finally got the laughs like when i did improv in high school it was a hobby when i got those first laughs on stage and saw him get those kinds of reactions um i was like oh i want to do this and i immediately started doing open mic nights and uh I dropped out of school. I was a year away from graduating. Wow. And don't worry. I was majoring in communication.

All right? Yeah. It's like, Brad's out of school. We lost the cancer cure. Like, no. Be mad at Ken Jeong. Ken Jeong was a legitimate doctor. Yeah.

He was a pediatrician. Practicing. Yeah. The dude from Community. The doctor from Yeah. He was a pediatrician. Practicing. Yeah. The dude from Community, the doctor from Knocked Up. Hangover movies. Hangover, all those things. He was a legitimate doctor. How fucking good are those Asians?

He's a doctor, and then he goes, well, now I'm going to just be a really famous actor, stand-up comic. Yeah. Headlining comedian. And then does it. Yeah. And then he does that, too. You overachieving bastard.

And you're like, I can't do this communications thing and comedy? Yeah. Are you kidding? I can't do both. What? No. And so I quit. I only say that because Ken's a friend and he's a great dude.

Yeah. But yeah, so I dropped out of school, which is a great conversation to have with your parents. Mom and dad, I'm dropping out of college. Why? To be a stand-up comedian. It didn't exactly go well, but it shouldn't have gone well. And they're like, how long have you been doing it? About a year, but I think I got this thing figured out.

Yeah, figure it out. Yeah. Which, by the way, is the right reaction. You'd be worried if you tell your parents you're dropping out of school to be a comic, and they go, okay. You're like, how bad was I in school? Yeah, yeah, Brad, you're blocking the tv yeah you're you're really just sucking the tuition money out of us so it's kind of a waste at this point so it was good and they didn't really uh they didn't really accept the

comedy until i bought him a house once i bought him a house they're like yeah we like this jesus christ yeah that's a good time to get on board. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're like, well, we're kind of against the comedy, but we like this roof. It's not bad. It's not bad. So that's when they were on board. But ever since then, now they know it's a living that I've been able to make, and I'm doing okay. Now they're cool with it.

Now the parents are cool with it. Wow. For rapid fire, that was a long time ago. That was a question. Sorry. Well, I was just interested. with it okay wow for rapid fire that was a long time that was a question sorry well i just i was uh i was just interested uh so like the whole thing it's crazy to be like he brings you up and then you're like i'm gonna get into it and then he's like come on tour with me and then he's like the biggest act at the time yeah so kind of like thrown into the wolves but sort of at the same

time it's supportive because it's like you know he's saying i vouch for this dude right now and you're performing for huge audiences yeah my fourth show with mincia i i i've been doing um like open mic nights and coffee shops for about a year and then mincia told me to come on the road with him and then like four shows later i'm doing a 1300 seat theater jesus christ like a year and a month in that's not normal no and but at the same time it forces you to become better when you're suddenly thrown into that situation where now you have to be good it's a sink or swim thing like the the biggest jump i ever made in my career was when i was on a tour where joe coy was going on before me and i had to follow him right and my god if you've never seen joe coy yeah monster he's a killer in his own right and this was right when he got a standing ovation on the tonight show and he was

doing the tonight show set so it was like every night guaranteed standing ovation there's no fat on that set just no yeah and i bombed so many nights following him but it made me better because it forced me to be like all right i gotta step my game up right you work some stuff so uh yeah so if you're putting those if you're putting those situations and lots of times i'll write jokes because i'll get too comfortable in my set and i'll go on stage going first five ten minutes I'm not gonna say a joke that I've ever written before and I'll just go on stage and start talking and just see what happens yeah um there's a saying that an acting teacher gave me one time and that's uh

desperate people get super creative super fast and if you get comfortable you're not taking chances you're not expanding so. You're not expanding. So put yourself in an uncomfortable situation. Force yourself to be good. And you will. You'll come up with some shit. It's great. It's a crazy thing.

You're like, where was this joke a month ago? But you weren't forcing yourself to think. It's floating around the brain. You just got to get it out there. You just kind of got to force yourself to do it. So just do it every now and then. Not every night. Yeah. Not every night. Yeah, for the whole time either. How do you guys feel about lemons?

Those are something. That's pretty good. Yeah, but just every night, every now and then, just force yourself to kind of think of some new shit. Cool, man. And then just to wrap up, yeah, thanks so much for doing this. This was fucking awesome. Are you and Carlos still cool now?

Yeah, we're still cool. We text every now and then whenever something happens in my career where it's good, I always text him. Thank you. Uh, because, uh, he took me from, first of all, he inspired me to do it. Yeah. And then he took, uh, me off the open mic scene and, and put me on the road with him. So I'll always owe a debt to the guy.

Sit in front of hundreds of people, thousands of people. Yeah. It's always a good thing. So, yeah, we remain friends. But, yeah, do you mind if I plug some stuff? Yeah, absolutely. Plug some stuff in. All right.

Like, nah, bro, I don't think so. I'll get it out of the way. What was your catchphrase? I'll do it quick. My Twitter is at FunnyBrad. My Instagram is at BradWilliamsComic. And my podcast is called About Last Night. Maybe go to the past episodes.

We had Dana Carvey on. Oh, yeah. I got to listen to that one. It's a great one. We had Melissa McCarthy on. We've had Bob Saget, Kevin Nealon, Taryn Killam from SNL. Lisa Kudrow is a great one. Lisa Kudrow was on.

How great is that that we got her? She's awesome. So it's a fun thing to do. So, yeah, have a listen to that one as well. Well, hell yeah, man. Let me get a little picture for you. Holding the microphone so you know. Yes, this is official for the website.

It's actually Brad Williams. Yes. Because you're like, that doesn't sound like a midget. He's not on the podcast Like I call it When I sit in the commando With all calls before

It was not What I intended to do It's not like that It's actually me It's real It's real Well done Well it's been fucking awesome man

Thank you so much Thank you Thank you for having me on the podcast Alabama Thank you for featuring And providing your Catchphrase Yeah let's let Alabama plug some stuff.

You know why I'm here. Thank you, Marshawn. He just dropped my own mic. That was crazy. He just walked away. And, yeah, thanks for having me. Absolutely. Do you want me to do one more fake ad?

Yeah, please, please. Let me plug some stuff real quick, and we'll go out on an ad. Thank you to everybody that's listening. If you're first time listening, go to digressionsessions.com and check out past and future episodes. digressionsessions.com slash calendar has all of our upcoming dates, live shows, improv, stand-up. And follow me on Twitter and Instagram.

It's at Josh Coderna. And now I'd like to do an ad from one of our favorite sponsors. We wouldn't be here without them. They help pay the bills around here. Here it is. Well, it's getting to be valentine's day everybody and do you have a special someone you're not sure what to get them you don't want to get them the cheesy gifts that they happen every year with uh the the the the jewelry that they can't afford the stuffed animal that they'll appreciate one time no you want to go to Sherry's Berries, everybody.

Sherrysberries.com. Rich, delectable strawberries dipped in rich milk chocolate, dark chocolate, white chocolate. They put sprinkles on them. They put nuts on them. Your date is going to love them. You will absolutely get a blowjob

as long as you go to Sherrysberries.com. Enter the promo code DS. That's the promo code ds on the microphone you get a 10 discount at sherrysberries.com everybody oh boy they don't pay us enough for those they certainly don't all right thanks everybody bye Bye-bye. I'm out.