The Digression Sessions - Ep. 192 - Mike Finazzo! (@TheeMikeFinazzo)

Episode Date: July 25, 2016

Hola, Digheads! This week Josh sits down with his good buddy and dear friend of the show, Mike Finazzo! Mike is a comedian and film maker. His latest film Wits End is making it's way through the festival circuit on the East Coast.   This week, the boys talk about old roommates, new jobs, and the dangers of skinning carrots naked. It's a good listen.   Follow the podcast and Josh Kuderna, on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.  Josh - @JoshKuderna on Twitter and @JoshKuderna on Instagram The Pod - @DigSeshPod on Twitter The Pod's Facebook page - Dig Sesh on Facebook Thanks for listening, all! Do the pod a favor and rate and review the pod on iTunes & Stitcher plz! We do a lot of favors for you, Henry.

Welcome to the Digression Sessions podcast everybody, Josh Kaderna here, your faithful host. How are you? Hello. Thanks for tuning in this episode is just me and my good buddy mike fanazo who is a comedian filmmaker all around good guy one hell of a model american and uh yeah we just kind of catch up on uh on each other's lives talk about uh what's been going on mike recently recently went through some crazy employment stuff and got screwed over at one job, but found a new job very quickly. The kid is, he's impressive.

Moves with the quickness. Love that guy. And yeah, we just kind of catch up on what's been going on. And Mike Fonazzo, he just put out a film recently, which we talked about on this podcast before, called Wits End, which you can see at some upcoming film festivals in the Baltimore, Maryland, Virginia area, the DC, Maryland, Virginia area, and possibly beyond. And he hopes to have the film online very soon. So we'll keep you posted on that. You can follow Mike on Twitter. He is at TheMikeFanazzo and his website is ThatMikeFanazzo.com. Yeah, love that guy. Had a good convo with him in my basement.

And for me, to plug some stuff, you can follow me on Twitter and Instagram. I'm at Josh Coderna on both of those platforms. And I have one big show coming up. I'm going out to LA for the first time at the end of the month. I will be there from the 29th to August 1st. I'm really excited for that. And the big show I'm doing is called Hot Tub with Kurt and Kristen, Kurt Bronneler and Kristen Shaw. And it's at the Virgil on August 1st at 8 p.m. in L.A. And I'm super, super excited. It's always a good show.

Like, they have tons and tons of good comedians. And me this time. So I know we have some listeners out in California in the L.A. area. If you could come to that show, it would be amazing to see some dig heads out there. That would be nuts. So, yeah, I'm really looking forward to that, going on a trip. I talk about it a little more in the actual conversation with Mike Fonazo, but I'm going to try to interview some people while I'm out there.

I'll be out there for a few days, and then me and some buddies are going to Mexico and then Havana, Cuba. I believe that's how it's pronounced for a few days. So your boy's going to get Zika. Woo! Ladies. And yeah, so if anybody can come out to that show, please do. And say hi on the Facebook page, the Digression Sessions Facebook page.

Really appreciate feedback and just comments in general. It's always cool to hear from listeners. Any thoughts? Usually positive, which are nice. And yeah, do that. And there's one more thing I can plug. Here in Baltimore, we have the Baltimore Rock Opera Society. And they always put on crazy, crazy productions of, you guessed it, rock operas. But recently, a documentary was made about one of the film, one of the rock operas they did last year. It's called Murder Castle.

And a documentary was made about it. It's going to premiere here in Baltimore on July 27th at the Charles Theater. So go to that. Go support those guys. They always do really cool stuff. And it's cool to see what they're doing on a really cool screen in a really cool theater in Baltimore. So go to that.

I think that's it for the plugs. And as always, appreciate you guys listening. Now let's get to me and Mike Fonazzo in my basement, possibly playing footsie the entire time. How's your throat? It's better. It's still a little sore, but it's a lot better. We can get started if you want. You can keep playing if you want. Oh, okay. You can, uh, yeah, you can keep playing if you want. Just mix that in like you're an old blues guy.

Yeah, I've been doing all right. Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-ow! Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-ow! Let me turn this amp off. Uh, no, man. Things are good. I'm in the basement with my good buddy mike finazzo hello joshua hi uh yeah this is gonna be umar's domain soon moving in so umar um is moving into a podcast studio yeah yeah he asked me to not move anything just leave the table the microphones guitars all that shit right so where

is like the music and podcast room gonna be uh probably just right above umar no i think i'm gonna move it to uh like the way my house is set up so the there's the bedroom upstairs like in the the second level and then there's like this middle room that's kind of like a no man's land of weird shit i mean i like how i'm asking this question like i've never been in oh yeah you've been up there yeah you know yeah yeah the house i'm currently what what where are we are you like building an addition just trying to be like the perfect like guest co-host like wait so tell me more about this i'm just byron allen yeah so someone's moving in tell me about that josh i understand you have a house is that correct it's funny you say that mike so so

when is uh umi moving in uh it's uh september 1st a new era yeah him and i have decided to take the next step in our relationship and move in together yeah man it's just uh i'd like to say things are not going to be the same but they're going to be exactly the same except for ubar is going to live here yeah exactly i think it'll be really good have you have you what was the last time you lived with someone that wasn't like a significant other oh man uh college yeah yeah i was probably yeah probably like six or seven years or something that's crazy because yeah i'm actually somewhere in there besides the the the brief time i lived in los angeles where i had a roommate i've never had a roommate that wasn't like a girlfriend i've always like lived on my own or yeah so i did live with two friends

uh originally which was a lot of fun and then one friend moved out while we were living in college and we got a random guy from craigslist named chi lin and uh he so yeah exactly so we had an ad on craigslist and one day i was at work and i got a call and uh i answered it and i was like hello and it was just this like timid voice he's like i'd like to rent room i'm like hello i was like oh okay uh yeah when when are you available he's like uh i ran room so uh sounds like a like a prequel to silicon pretty much yeah yeah this is before he turned bad yeah i love that character by the way so good i love that she's like hey it's me you're dead mom i don't love you or something oh uh so yeah so we set up a time and he showed up and then i was

living with my friend ryan and he wasn't there so chilean came over it's little asian guy taiwanese guy and uh he's like okay okay he's good okay and uh i was like all right well yeah we're interviewing some other people and uh i'll let you know and he's like okay okay and i was like also my roommate ryan's not here so if you come back when he's here like i don't feel like it's fair and he's like okay uh when will he be here i was like yeah i'll actually be here tomorrow he's like okay so cut to the next day it's sunday morning i'm at work i get a call from sheila and he's like i'm outside and i was like outside of where he's like the apartment i'd like to rent room and uh i was like oh i'm not there but ryan's there and it's like nine in the morning and he was living in philadelphia that chile and so he like took a bus the next day to come back

and meet ryan so there was like something lost and like he'd like to meet you okay when is he here he's here tomorrow but we'll set there is something literally lost in translation big time big time so he just showed up and tried to like scramble to call ryan and who was sleeping i was like hey there's a small asian man outside he wants to meet don't be alarmed he's gonna be our future roommate yeah and so everything was cool and then he moved in and chilean was just uh the nicest guy and like super smart too it was like some type of i i don't know what he did i think like biochemistry or something but like he was just a little off in some ways like uh we one time we had a couple people over and i think we're playing like we bowling that's when it was like all the right all the kids were playing we bowling and uh she just made a tray of hot dogs as like a peace offering i guess to be like hey america yeah he's like do you guys want hot dogs

it was just a plate of hot i like that's like the outside looking good version of america oh of course i'll like hot dogs. Yeah, what are these white American pieces of shit eat all the time? And we're like, oh. And then it's like, I'm vegetarian. And everybody's like, I don't want just a plate of hot dogs. So it's like kind of like, oh, womp, womp. How long was he there?

I think he ended up being there like a little more than a year maybe. And then a few days after the hot dog thing um i was making a peanut butter and jelly and in the kitchen he was in there too and he was like peanut butter and jelly and i was like yeah he goes together and i was like yeah do you want to try it and he was like no no no like grossed out face, waving his hand like, ugh. What do you think he eats peanut butter with? I don't know. Cats, I assume. No, I don't know.

I don't know. Well, shout out to Chi Lin. Yeah, he's doing well. We're friends on Facebook. I saw he got married. He's a good guy. He just got married to a plate of hot dogs. He's like, I'm fully Americanized now, baby.

Country music, yes. But yeah, since then, I haven't, yeah, I've always lived with significant others. So yeah, I was fine paying rent by myself for a bit, but it's just dumb. Like $1,300 is so much money like before other bills and utilities and shit so i don't feel sorry for you because i know how much money you make i'm rich well that's good i'm glad that we're i'm sure it's probably just nice to have somebody else around

too yeah i don't know i like being i don't mind like i grew up as an only child and shit too like so i don't mind let's psychoanalyze yeah let's break it down i don't mind. Like I grew up as an only child and shit too. Like, so I don't mind. Let's psychoanalyze. Yeah. Let's break it down. I don't mind being alone in a big house. It's the weirdest therapy session. Yeah. I am laying on chase lounge. By the way, Mike has a notebook out and he's just doodling.

Kill myself. Uh, question mark. Um, uh, no, like last night I was, uh,

I was just walking around naked, making dinner. And I was like, probably gonna have to put a stop to this at some point and i was uh i was uh making carrots was slicing some carrots and i was skinning them naked and i was like man it would suck if i skin my dick it's my thought and then i like literally skinned my finger like ripped off a chunk of my nail i was like oh i was close to the dick you win this round um carrot skinner there's so many interesting things about sure break it down like that sounds like the most

boring yeah it was friday night too it was i didn't even think about that i had a load of laundry and i just weed whacked it was productive very productive yeah because i i had a like a bachelor friday night and i was like man this is sad but my night was way more exciting than yours i'm sure which just involved watching baseball yeah no i felt so good i was like oh i'm gonna do the dishes i'm gonna clean up around here this is nice i'm just catching up you know um yeah it's just like the idea of like you alone naked skinning carrots sounds like the most boring american psycho sequel you're just you're still listening to robert palmer

oh uh uh fuck uh god why am i blanking on his name like everybody oh huey lewis huey lewis yeah and then he also loved uh the dude from genesis oh phil collins yeah yeah susu studio it's most important work today uh yeah i invite prostitutes over just to eat carrots don't stare at it eat it it's like jesus christ uh yeah so that was my night but it was it was pretty good but yeah i've i've been sick this week too so but i'm doing better got the tonsillitis i'm a i'm glad that we were texting about that a little i think i used all my good jokes about your throat issues and you can replicate them i'll byron allen you it's not now mike i understand you had some good throat jokes

cultural references jokes about my throat tell me about those go ahead with that one oh no I'm sure I mean it's all just dated at this point you know about Michael Douglas yeah I mean was dated on Tuesday how are we gonna feel on Saturday it's a good point yeah and this won't be out for a little bit cuz I'm backlogging I'm trying after taking like a month so no I'm glad that you're're like prince you're gonna have a vault of just podcasts yeah so if the world goes under that's what people are worried about they're like what is he gonna do with all his unreleased podcasts when was he skinning carrots naked we don't know is he still doing that yeah yeah people want to know what archaeologists are digging through the

ruins of hamden or truett hill park or wherever we are this non-disclosed location that'll soon have a little brown man living here they're gonna find i just like the idea of like umar is gonna move in and instead of like finding like the child poured stash he's just gonna find a hard drive up just podcast yeah exactly and umar's blinkink-182 stuff. It's like, man, two of the whitest guys ever lived here. No. Okay. So let's, yeah. So I got the pussy eating disease.

That's what it was from. Michael Douglas. We got it. Let's talk about you, Mike Panazzo. Okay. Because last time you were here, we were talking about your film, Wits End. Oh, yeah. And recently, you went through some shakeups with work.

Did you not michael you know it's funny you say that josh because i i've gone through some life changes wow i had no idea have i physically seen you since then i don't think so because that was may because that was when we it was for the i was one of the pockets for the senator screening right yeah and then so yeah it's a bump fest so yeah that was yeah i saw you well i think we recorded that a few weeks before that before the the showing at the senator which congratulations thank you you were there for that yeah i was there yeah i remember there was a very funny moment where you went to the bathroom yeah and i thought it was weird because you had left right before your scene and i'm like is he just uncomfortable watching himself and then you walk in and you're blown up with a big scream and you did the whole me yeah i didn't even go to the bathroom i just went outside the door counted down like a minute 58 59 hey you accidentally walk in you

see it's not you and then you walk back just here we go fuck right god damn it no that was a wonderful screening yeah it was really cool man bump fest was a good because that's what we were talking about was uh the baltimore underground motion picture festival that went really really well yeah it was seeing like uh some uh local people's uh stuff up on the big screen yeah it's cool the silver screen they call it they call it the silver screen um but yeah it was just cool watching our movie. And they is Jews? The Jews and or Indians. Because you watch Wits End or the silver screen with a solitary tear running down your cheek.

Why is this happening? But we watched, excuse me, we watched. I will not excuse you. We watched Wits End, which is like literally the smallest budgeted feature film you'll ever see yeah and to watch it on like the same screen where like i watched waffle wall street right scorsese it was just awesome yeah it was really cool we had a packed house and yeah uh joey malinsky who is a friend of ours and lives like a few doors down from here and he showed his awesome short film it was just a great night yeah it was cool yeah bob rose showed his uh yeah oh yeah bob was that night too because

he had he was on he had shorts on two different nights and that was one of them too yeah yeah um but uh yeah it was a fun three nights and our screening went really well we've done a few screenings since then which have all gone well so right people people uh always single you out as being very good oh really yeah especially when the new york screening we did which there was a ton of comics yeah you showed at the creek in the cave yeah it's just sort of like a little bit of a reunion for like all our buddies that moved to new york yeah i kept calling it uh the dc north uh screen because it was like literally 35 people in the room and like 30 of them were comics that used

to live in baltimore dc yeah so that was pretty awesome just to like well one just to see people and then also like i knew the screening would go well because it's like those are our friends they're just gonna be excited to see jason and yeah and then it's yeah it's kind of fun to see all those guys yeah that's cool um so that was fun there was also cool just like randy syphax who's like our friend that's like blown up yeah he was on the tonight show yeah so the tonight show took time to see our movie yeah uh so that was just cool to see everybody fucking amen um so what's going on next like are you still just doing like film festivals here and there is there are you trying to get on itunes or online or vimeo right so the timeline is right now so we applied to seven film festivals

and like one of them was like the columbia film festival which we just screened at and i'm still waiting to hear back from five okay um and all those notifications are like for the fall so like i'll know in september if we got into those festivals god it's like getting into college i know yeah uh just waiting for well it used to be a letter now you just get yeah uh either uh most like just a form letter that they send to everybody saying no we don't like it yeah it's all it always sucks too if you're reading because they don't just say like no it just says like thank you for applying we've had a tremendous amount of submissions this year and you're like fuck yeah exactly yeah um so uh yeah there's like five

festivals some of them are like small some of them are like bigger festivals and um basically after we hear back from those we'll put the movie on vimeo on demand to release and uh probably itunes so we'll start looking like all the yeah itunes it's a little expensive to do all that but and also with it's not like with uh how we put the album up like movies is completely different there's like a pretty strenuous approval process it's really costly to do so yeah yeah because i was looking because i was uh when a better robot was a functioning uh record label i was going to try to put weems's stuff out, and I looked into getting a DVD or an hour's worth of filmed content on the iTunes,

and it was like $1,000 minimum. I was like, holy shit. So that's why the movies you see on there have a distribution of some kind. Yeah, exactly. Even if it's small movies. It's a company putting those out. Right, right, right.

But I really like the platform Vimeo On Demand, which I personally just watch a lot of movies on of because you could just do like five bucks or something right yeah you can pay so you pay like a fee to have like a pro account which I actually already have because when you're submitting to like film festivals and stuff you're submitting links through Vimeo so like you want to be HD and like super you want to be the quality possible and exactly so like really the only difference like, if we want to sell it, we just change the settings to where it puts it in the store. And it's, like, a really fair split for the artist.

And it's really artist friendly. And there's actually just, like, besides, like, supporting, like, indie talent, there's, like, a lot of movies I've, like, found on there that I just personally like. Oh, nice. And watch. Good deal. So, yeah, it's cool. It's a platform. Does it do, like, a suggestion thing? Sort of like YouTube? Yeah, like Amazon. Like, if you like this, you'll like. Exactly so yeah it's cool it's a platform does it do like a suggestion

thing sort of like youtube like if you like this exactly and that's another avenue too is amazon actually just started that for indie filmmakers to where you can personally distribute stuff but it's way easier and cheaper than itunes like that's a platform we'll look at gotcha gotcha so yeah so basically what i've been telling everybody is uh we're waiting to hear back from these festivals but by the end of the year or early next year it'll be online for sale nice um so yeah good deal okay and so you and you're working on the next one right you're writing that working on the next one which i think i've referenced a few times on here it's called bored in the usa and it's funny how like as my life changes the the stories in the movie oh too. Oh, really? Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know. So you brought up life changes, Josh. Did I? Yeah, you did. God, I'm such a great interviewer. Yeah, you do it great. Very casual. Yeah. No, so like recently I left my old job.

Now, Mike, I understand recently you left your old job. Yeah, I left after they told me to stop coming in. He said, you know what i'm not gonna come back here the timing worked out yeah well it's pretty pretty fucked up uh i don't know how much detail you want to go into it but you kind of you got railroaded basically a little bit yeah i won't go into like two and i want to slam the old you were i mean you've stirred your coffee with your dick before and everybody's like haha it's fun but all of a sudden carol gets a fucking wild hair up her ass about it i wish it was it was that kind of hr issue i think because there's there have been things where it's like i've like cursed at meetings

or like said something inappropriate nothing's ever happened oh that's mike he's a comedian yeah yeah and he's smiling when he says it yeah yeah um i wish it was like that yeah i used to have that too well i still kind of do but yeah like the other jobs i had i get away with that like man this is bullshit they're like ah come on you little scamp you shouldn't be saying that but uh yes so i i i i i stopped going to my old job that's one way to put it and i said nuts to employment i'm out of here yeah yeah um i said nuts to being fired yeah and stopped i was like no you're gonna fire me i'm just not gonna come anymore right and go and watch wrestlemania which i did say did i tell you that you did actually say i did say that that's tell you that? You did actually say that? I did say that. That's amazing. The joke I told on stage recently about being fired is the meeting that I got fired in, I got three laughs and I cried a little bit.

So it was basically every stand-up set I've ever done. That's a good ratio. Yeah. As long as you have more laughs than cries. Exactly. A three-to-one ratio is solid. Not bad. But yeah, so at the end of it, they were like, do you have any questions?

And I said, I just want to go home and watch WrestleMania. And no one got the reference. ratio is solid not bad but yeah so at the end of it they're like do you have any questions and i said i just want to go home and watch wrestlemania and no one got the i was gonna say what did they say like they were just like oh i guess that's how he copes okay yeah go ahead if you want and of course that's from uh making a murderer yeah exactly right which that that is weird to think like that making a murder was such a big part of all of our lives. Yeah. For like three weeks. Yeah. In January. Yeah.

I was, every episode I was like, holy shit. Yeah. This is so fucked up. We're texting theories back and forth. Yeah. But no, that is the running joke between you and I about like anytime we're doing something that sucks, just like all I want to do is just go home and watch WrestleMania. Yeah. Exactly.

We're all Brendan Dassey. Which of course is about brendan uh being charged with murder and going to prison for the rest of his life right me and you were talking about like bad stand-up shows exactly yeah it's me in a green room with an awkward headliner or something yeah it's pretty apt but pretty apt comparison um so yeah i used that line when i got fired and uh i don't know if I should be talking about it. I mean, I don't know. Well, it's up to you.

I don't think I can get in trouble at my new job or anything for saying this. Yeah, I think if you're just saying, like, you don't have to go into detail. So, basically, it was sort of like a clerical thing. It was a documentation issue that I got fired for. And so it was simple. It wasn't like you were cheating anybody out of anything. You weren't falsifying anything. It was sort of just like this is the way we do things and then it's just like nothing nothing of consequence would have happened just to clarify i did something wrong

like i and i admitted yeah something i shouldn't like extremely egregious or you weren't doing it for your own benefit it's something everybody else that i've worked with has done at some point it's something that i've been instructed to do worse versions of right and then i got fired but even like the timing of it was like peculiar because like i got promoted to being a manager but i was like getting paid like ridiculously less than like a management position oh that's not cool and uh so i said something about it like a few times. And I kept hearing, you know, we're going to do something about this. And like the last I heard was we don't know what the amount's going to be. But starting in July, after what we put our new budget in place,

you're going to get a bump on July 1st. And I got fired June 30th. Yeah, exactly. Literally the day before. So there's like weird timing, things like that. And even the fact that I didn't get any warnings or anything. Especially for something so small. It's more just like, hey, next time you document this, do it this way.

Versus like, hey, you're out of here. Or yeah, it's like give me a warning or something and like like prevent that in the future but like i've actually a friend of mine who was like an old manager at the organization i came from was in an audit with the government and they discovered someone else doing the same exact thing i did and they were just like oh you shouldn't do that and just moved on and this was an internal audit so there was no cut like no government official was involved now there was the organization didn't lose money that or anything like that um so yeah so i got fired for some pretty shady reasons i think and yeah uh but it ended up i ended up uh literally like two hours

after getting fired i applied to uber to make sure i had income yeah it was it was crazy if that if that happened to me i'd be like i, I'm just going to take the day. Like, fuck it. I'm going to go home and just play. Watch WrestleMania. I'm going to go home, watch WrestleMania. I'm going to skin some carrots nude, my favorite pastime, and just try to collect myself.

So, yeah, I applied to Uber to make sure I had some money. Yeah. And also just to be busy. Right. And then a friend of mine who I used to Uber to make sure I had some money. Yeah. And also just to like be busy. Right. And that a friend of mine who like I used to work with and actually works for the state government was like, hey, like there's another organization to the same thing you do. Honestly, they have a better reputation. They do better work.

Apply there. I'll put in a word for you. Yeah. So like I fixed my resume up, which like I haven't applied for a job in six years so yeah i had to like that's create a new resume that's daunting too yeah and uh so i did that like in a few hours and like by the end of the day i applied to this new non-profit nice and then the next day i got a phone interview with them which is so incredible like most people i think would take like like all right it's just

this is fucked up like maybe work on the resume the next day yeah you applied to uber you got that out and then a day after being fired you get a phone interview yeah it's like a reputable organization yeah and this was all fourth of july weekend too so even i'm thinking like the timing of it i'm like i'm gonna apply they'll probably look at it like probably people are gonna be on vacation next week right right they'll probably look at it in a few weeks you know and hopefully by like august like i'm up and running with something yeah and so i had this phone interview that friday it went really well they brought me in for like an in-person interview on wednesday yeah and they then they brought me in for like a second interview on friday and i'm like so i i had a feeling like i was going to get an offer

just because like all the interviews went well yeah and it's so quick too yeah it's just how quick the turnaround like so they're probably gonna like ask me to start like two weeks and on the friday second interview they were like well you know we'd like to offer you the position uh what you said start i'm going to go home. Watch us. Exactly. Y'all because it works both ways. It's celebratory and mournful.

Yeah. And whatever works for you. And so they're like, when can you start? I was like, I'm pretty flexible. I didn't want to be like, you know, right now. Give me a job, please. Yeah, that was the other way. They call me for like the second interview.

They're like, are you available on Friday? And I did like the cheesy movie thing right call let me look at my schedule real quick and i'm just like shuffling around papers and like literally two seconds later like yep i could do that let me see what i've got here it's just a bunch of suicide notes um i'm good yeah i should be available um and so yeah i cut they offer the job and then i was surprised like could you start Monday and I'm like all right like let's do that so like essentially like not including Uber which I started doing like three days after I left the other job right like I was out of work for a week yeah and yeah started this week and it was awesome the new people I work with are incredible yeah yeah no that's what I'm so happy for you like each day you text me you're like and also um they look me

in the eye here and they say nice things yeah yeah my boss like sent like because so that basically the new job i have it's it's essentially like my old job like i didn't really need a lot of training going into it yeah and which is good yeah and like they train me for like a few days and they just like would usually it's like for the job i do it's like pretty strenuous and how they train people like even if it's like a flexible position they make sure people are ready to go because you know just because of the nature of the work yeah and um yeah after three days like i there's nothing we can teach you just go out and do it yeah friday like i got like an awesome email from my boss just saying how great i'm doing and how like it was an easy and great decision to hire me

yeah isn't it cool how like little stuff like that like really just helps just like hey you're doing great yeah thank you versus your boss being like um you didn't fill out this form right yeah you know like so but it's one of those things like it worked out like i don't believe in like god or religion or whatever but i was like oh somebody was looking out like it was like it's one of those things, like, it worked out. Like, I don't believe in, like, God or religion or whatever, but I was like, oh, somebody was looking out. Like, it was, like, it's just how quickly everything happened. Well, the thing is, too, I mean, it's, like, what they say, like, success is, like, opportunity meets, like,

like, hard work meets opportunity or something like that. But basically, you put yourself in that position. Like, it might not have worked if maybe you waited like two weeks, you know what I mean? To put all that shit together. But the fact that you did even just Uber, like in the short term, I mean,

really you only were like an Uber person for like a week. And like, really you could have just taken a week off, you know, like, cause you still had a paycheck coming from your old job. Right. Yeah.

So even I, I feel like most people would be like i'm just gonna take the week you know but like you fucking yeah kill it you were unemployed for a week but that doesn't even really count like the the interviews and stuff that you did yeah entire week like essentially i had two days off like in terms of like yeah exactly i stopped the other job like yeah like it was uh it was just a crazy last two weeks yeah but it was also like i did that stuff like not just because of like i needed another job but just to keep busy like right like leaving the other job like which i had actually thought about doing anyway and i think

that that was part of why they let me go as i think there were rumblings of me being unhappy and wanting to go elsewhere sure um like it was one of those things, like, it was still, like, pretty, like, shell shocking to happen. And, like, abrupt. It was, like, going through, like, a breakup. Yeah. And, like, I just didn't want to, like, be sitting home, like, post that. Like, I wanted to keep busy and do some other stuff. You want to get out there, get your fuck on.

Yeah, exactly. Right. I fucked everything that moved. That's what Uber was. That was my. That was just, that was your rebound chick. Yeah. You went out to the bar and you're like,

you. Yeah, exactly. You. Anybody. Anybody. And then you settled down. Yeah, I settled down with a really, really nice organization, which couldn't be cooler to work with.

I'm fucking a really nice organization now. I'm going to meet the organization's parents pretty soon. Exactly. No, that's fucking great, man. I'm really a really nice organization. I'm going to meet the organization's parents pretty soon. Exactly. No, that's fucking great, man. I'm really excited for you. I,

um, yeah, I was very impressed. Also, I was like teleworking in my underwear and I'm just like, dude, you got a rough man. You're like,

you're like, well, I just got fired. I'm like, holy shit. I thought of that earlier today. Cause I thought this would come up was when, when it all happened,

when the shit went down yeah man they uh it was so i got pulled into this meeting they were like you did this wrong thing hr is coming in an hour and i had like an hour to kill first thing i did was call my wife and told her exactly what's happened second thing i did was text you yeah and like your response was literally whoa it was whoa with eight h's and 20 a's yeah i just i couldn't believe it i didn't that's all i could say like what yeah it was i read it like you were an aziz character or something have you seen jim jeffries new special i haven't it's really good he takes a uh a dig at aziz really it's interesting.

Jim Jeffries talks about religion on it. I don't know if he usually stays away from that topic. But no, he's talking about it. I actually don't know Jim Jeffries' stand-up. Really? It's really good. I've listened to him on podcasts. He's hilarious. Yeah, conversationally, he's one of my favorite comedians.

But his new special is really good. 90 minutes, a lot of storytelling but he's talking about like religion and how they're no fun and stuff like that like how it's just all kind of like hate and anger there's no room for enjoyment especially and he's talking about isis and he calls isis is is which is kind of interesting too yeah yeah but he doesn't like he doesn't do it in the same way that uh jason ween his but his bits hilarious it's talking about he wishes george bush around yeah still around because he would call isis by the way uh when this comes out this might be old but did you see the video of george bush dancing

at i did yeah for the uh the police in texas absolutely i know it's probably like culturally late by the time you hear this but it's just you're at a memorial service a funeral for five cops we're gonna be over the dallas yeah we will be in two weeks right it'll be something it'll be another murder yeah yeah but george george they're saying hallelujah he and he's just like dancing. And the best part is he's holding his wife's hand and Michelle Obama's hand, and Michelle kind of looks over like, what are you doing? And then George Bush leans over and he's like, hallelujah. Kind of like, what are you doing, Michelle? Get into it.

The only thing that would be better is if he was doing the Jeff Buckley hallelujah, and then he was still going. Super sad. was doing the uh jeff buckley hallelujah and then he was still going super sad uh but yeah jim jeffries uh he's talking about this so like is like isis they don't have any fun he's like yeah you never see those videos like a beheading video the guy's like hello uh um uh i'm gonna do this beheading but first a little bit about me uh i like Allah. I mean, I love Allah. I love Allah. I love him. I also like the comedy of Aziz. I like Aziz.

I like Aziz. He's fun. He has trouble with modern day problems. It's like, wow. A little bit of a dig at Aziz. Yeah. But it's a good special. I'm going to have to check it out.

Yeah. It's on Netflix. Cool. I think it's a good special i'm gonna have to check it out yeah it's on netflix i think it's called free dumb as in like dumb yeah um but yeah it's good uh i forget where i was going i like ali wong special which yeah that was a really good one yeah yeah to to do your special what was she like six months pregnant yeah and she doesn't even address it till like halfway through all right yeah bonnie mcfarland did something similar when she like her she did her hbo half hour when she was like it was eight months pregnant or something insane jesus christ yeah it was pretty ballsy but i i just like the idea of like ali wong doesn't address it to like 40 minutes in or something like that yeah yeah

yeah and it's not like she's hiding it either. She has a pretty tight dress on. It's like, you're fucking pregnant as fuck. That's the medical term. Pregnant as fuck. But yeah, no, I'm so happy for you that shit is going well. Thanks, buddy. Yeah, let's see. What's going on with me? I got a Prius, which is nice.

I've seen pictures. I'll show it to you. It's very nice. I'm excited to have a car that has air conditioning most of all and uh i am becoming that that like prius driver like well i've been averaging 62 miles per gallon so it's pretty nice um but yesterday i had to go to the nba to get rid of so i sold my old car to my uncle because uh he just needs like a kind of in-between car and luckily that went well at the NBA got all that shit out of the way I had to so when I got my car I got it I had a loan I got an auto loan for my credit union

so on the title it says there's a lien on it through my credit union and I paid the car off and then I was gonna sell it to my uncle but you needed a letter that says uh the car has been paid off from the bank or from the credit union and they would not fucking send it to me like i had to talk to like eight different like i think there's like six different branches and everybody i talked to they're like oh we'll mail it out in two weeks two weeks go by they're like oh no no it takes 10 days to process the payment and then we'll mail it to you like can you just print it and they're like no no we gotta mail it to you printing yeah exactly like it's like can you just email me a fucking pdf and i'll print it like no no no and then uh and then so finally like that all that goes by then this week it's been i don't know it's been like almost a month now. Because I thought I was going to get my uncle a car two weeks ago.

So he started insurance on the car because we were supposed to meet up. And then I call somebody on Wednesday. And this woman goes, I don't know. It takes at least 30 days to mail. I was like, why 30 days? Also, why have you given me three different answers? Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

And then she goes, yeah, it takes 30 days. Plus, we had the holiday. And I'm like, what does that mean? We're one day? Like, oh, yeah, that slows it all down. And I was like, fuck this. And I called another branch. And then a guy's like, oh, yeah, we can do that.

We can print it out for you. You can come in. And it's like, what the fuck? Like, it was so ridiculous. And then also, i was like well i need to get it uh notarized too and like oh we have a notary come on in and so it's just like that like bullshit of like no we don't do like people just didn't give a fuck about it so luckily we got that out of the way got my uncle the car and uh got some more stories about my crazy family

which was uh not not fun like um like i've talked about on here like how like going through shit with my mom and stuff and so my uncle is divorcing my aunt who is my mom's sister we're talking about how they can uh be a little uh narcissistic yeah and uh narcissistic as fuck is the medical exactly uh i'm a mental health professional so i know it's my job yeah uh yeah the uh my uncle's telling me a story is like uh he's like yeah because we were talking about like they sort of have a lack of empathy as well right he said once he's like yeah i was driving with your aunt one time and uh we saw a blind guy where where they live and he was walking on the sidewalk and like a summer day it was really hot and he had

like his stick out and everything and they were driving he's like man look at him man that's rough and my aunt goes he doesn't have my problems already you're doing better than you can see right I've already got a leg up yeah and then like finding out that like none of the like children like of so that side of the family is the bailey family none of the bailey kids talk to the bailey parents right right he's like see i led this revolution thank you exactly so uh so yeah it's uh it was good actually seeing my uncle for a while and then like hearing about all that crazy shit like i'm glad i'm done with that shit yeah yeah good god um but yeah other than that the stuff's been good man uh doing comedy and

doing artscape tonight oh that's cool which will be fun is that at the yellow sign theater uh no it's well it might be it's it's called the artscape playhouse okay so i think it's where every man used to be like it's next to sophie sophie's crepes yeah yeah so got that and then uh yeah going to la and mexico and cuba soon that's uh first week in august yeah yeah so i fly out to la and i've never been there before so i'm excited but i'm flying out on the 29th cool man i'll be there for four days and then uh yeah go to mexico for three or four and then cuba for three that's great i know your boy's gonna get zika get zika's fuck yeah i'm gonna get zika's fuck uh I mean I hope not but uh yeah um no I'm looking forward to it man and uh doing shows out in LA and stuff yeah you're doing a Kurt Brauner show

yeah yeah Kristen Schaal the hot tub show on the first so uh I know we have people that listen in California I don't know if it's LA but come to the show for me not for people that actually you know are paid to do comedy regularly like it's gonna be kind of a nightmare where it's la but come to the show for me not for people that actually you know are paid to do comedy regularly like it's gonna be kind of a nightmare where it's like this person from comedy central hbo special a white guy with braces hello i think you'll be fine i hope so god i hope so the white guy with braces that will William H. Macy from Magnolia. And they'd be like, fuck, that's mine. What? Are you serious?

That was my thing. And then he hooks up with the hot bartender with muscles. I'm like, I have my eye on that guy. God. Speaking of movies, loosely, went to... That was the most broadest thing.

Thank you. Speaking of movies movies you ever see a movie speaking of breathing you ever do stuff speaking of stuff went to went to Target the other day with Karen and we were walking it's weird like when we're out it's we seem to attract like weirdos I don't know why like so we're walking in target and this guy walks up to us and he's holding a dvd he goes y'all seen this we're like uh he shows it to us and it's season one of night rider like david hasselhoff air night rider dvd yeah this is pretty cool i was like yeah that's yeah okay very specific and he goes uh we all think of this like i mean if you like yeah night rider yeah do you like talking cars yeah off yeah exactly and then he goes he goes well it's brand new and i was like well it's from the 80s then he goes it says 2016

and it's like well the dvd might have been made in 2016 but this is from the 80s he goes this is from 2016 and i was like what the fuck yeah and then this morning karen and i uh we stopped at right aid and uh and we're in line and um there's a guy ahead of us taking forever so we're just kind of standing there and then there's like we're all like the gum and shit is we're standing by that and there's like a little espresso shot it's like in a little coffee cup but it's like an energy drink or whatever so we're looking at like what is this and then a guy in front of us he goes yeah i used to drink energy drinks then i stopped drinking when i found out they had bull sperm in them like what why would you say that to a stranger and then you walk away going i have it way better than that guy because it's hereditary

yeah we just talked about that for a while he goes i don't know how they get it but it's in all the drinks i was like, let me just Google this. And there was a guy, and the guy that we were waiting on was this old guy that was fucked up and hobbled, but he had a neck tattoo that said Desperado. Of course he did. Yeah, exactly. That's a Desperado. He has a cane.

That's how I pictured Desperados. So then I look it up. I just Googled energy drink bull sperm like i normally do so it auto completed real quick for me and uh turns out he's talking about taurine uh which is in energy drinks but it is just found in like it's just an animal protein yeah so it can be in sperm as well but when they put it in drinks they're not like jerking off but like right that would first of all that wouldn't be economical at all that would make from a business sense you're just like constantly jerking off bulls and uh so it's like it's synthetic and he's like well i don't know

okay so yeah it was good it was a weird kind of a weird morning. That sounds like, remember like in Clerks, like the guy who was like selling the cigarette, or he was like the gum representative was like shitting on cigarettes. Oh, yeah. That guy's trying to not get people to drink energy drink. Right, right, right. Because he has an alternative. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He just pulls it out of his pocket.

Now, what I like is duck jizz. Now, that'll get you up. Duck cum. Duck cum. Duck cum. Yeah. And yeah, so that was a little bit of a weird morning. But I don't know, man. Things are good so far.

Good, man. Yeah. And things with the lady are good. Yeah. Things are cool. She's working on a resume now. And I was like, you got to be like Mike Fonazzo. Get a fucking job.

No. Yeah. Things are good, man. So, yeah, Umar is going to move in. And I've been catching a lot of Pokemon. So things are catching. That was because I actually. Catching them all. I haven't been paying attention to social media for a few weeks. And then Wednesday night I just went to have.

I met up at Bean Hollow in Ellicott City with some friends. Okay. And there was a sea of people doing Pokemon. That's so weird. There was literally at least 100 people in the parking lot just playing Pokemon. I had no idea what it was. Yeah. I had no idea because I remember hearing about Pokemon when I was at Argus when we were kids.

Yeah. It was kind of popular. Yeah. I think I was like 12 or 13. Yeah. I don't know. That sounds about right. Yeah. See, it was just weird. eric's when we were kids like yeah it's kind of popular yeah i think i was like 12 or 13 yeah i don't know it sounds about right yeah uh see i was just weird like there's everybody's just walking around with their face and their phone yeah like even more than usual with their phone plugged into like an external battery like we saw a ton of people like that right right right they needed

the extra battery just in case some shit pops up or whatever yeah and then um my friend adam was like yeah you don't want to be that guy where it's like i was about to get it i was about to get it then one percent it just died it was it was i'd picture it like vietnam or something like it's like what's the big deal it's like you weren't there man yeah it's like the scene from platoon when uh who gets shot up in that movie uh old cheekbones guy like they make fun of it yeah they make fun of it tropic thunder when he drops his knees and like flails that's what happens when the battery dies i was so close no i think like my fit so we actually so like if you don't know ellicott city like beat hollis at the bottom of the hill and we're like let's go to the top of the hill.

Apparently, that's where all... It's 11 o'clock at night. Right. There's 100 people just standing around doing this. My favorite part was there was a few dudes sitting on the sidewalk with their phone plugged in to an outlet on a brick wall.

What the fuck? Just to get... Just a little extra juice yeah and it was like one of those crazy things like it's like i will suck dick for battery life to play my pokey come on man i gotta catch it like it's so weird to me how quickly that popped off and like the amount of people doing it and then also looking at us like we're the freaks like there was definitely like well we're just like walking around just like with our face not yeah on our phones yeah like there's definitely like what are they doing here yeah well they have to be weary of those people because they're like

setting like other people are like setting traps for these kids because apparently like so these are i did not see one kid doing it like right oh yeah yeah i guess yeah when i say kids i mean like 34 year old adults but yeah like uh so i went to the brand new and modest mouse show this week uh with umar and we ran into a friend travis uh really talented uh photographer travis marshall and uh i thought like he's like oh what are you guys doing here and they're like kind of joking around it's like i'm just here for pokemon man and he was like yeah me too there's a lot of people here which means there'll be a lot of like he got like real in depth so apparently the more people there are in one area that attracts yeah because they have like hot spots based yeah or whatever so i think uh thieves have come uh to this knowledge

somehow so you can like set like a pokey lore or something like that and it tracks a bunch of people to an area and then they just steal your phone yeah we were we were talking about how uh one it's amazing you can get 100 people in a parking lot for poking a lot for pokemon you can't get 100 people out to a comedy show no way or a movie no so we thought that would be like the next game where it's like basically the pokemon edition of stand-up comedy yeah it's like rotten tomatoes we're just throwing shit at a comedian but like on your phone yeah just flicking yeah you know you're doing horribly when everybody's just like touching their phone just throwing shit at you uh have you been doing stand-up a little bit yeah um yeah i i did boy i have not since my wits end show last week but um i got a little bit

coming up okay uh i'm gonna be at mcgoobies with tom segura i know i'm so jealous yeah i'm gonna give you the record well wait two weeks when what weekend is that it's august 4th through the 6th i think it's whatever the thursday friday saturday is well actually you have your own zoom right yeah yeah yeah you should do it i'll give you the mics if you want because i think i'm going to take this recorder with me just to kind of like document shit and then maybe if i can uh fucking like corner kristen shaw just like you want to talk to me i was like you know what's weird my head went to cuba yeah cuba i'm gonna take kristen shaw to cuba with me and i want to document it you're like i'm just gonna interview the locals about uh you know community uh medicine yeah exactly i'm to document it you're like i'm just gonna interview the locals about uh

you know community uh medicine yeah exactly i'm just holding it to their face let me just take it um but yeah i'm down to pod with if he's down i'm sure he would be yeah especially if you're already in the green room already in the green room i have a mutual i actually kind of have two mutual friends with pat pat house yeah like him and burt Kreischer. Bert's been very good to me. Just be like, hey man, Bert's fat. Do you want to... I'm thinking about buying a Bert is fat shirt and wearing it at the shows just to connect with Tom.

But the thing is, if I was around Bert, I'd be wearing a Tom is fat shirt. So I'm thinking about tweeting ahead of time because I follow them both, obviously. I just try to start the conversation. Can we all be friends? Or I could just be like a smarmy douchebag and just play both sides and be like, Bert's fat, right?

What an idiot, always having his shirt on. Gross, he's fat. Put his shirt on, fatty. If you can, put a tent on. You're fat. Yeah, for those that don't know about that like tom segura super funny comedian and burt kreischer also super funny and they're best friends yeah and they always joke about how the other's fat and then for some reason tom started a hashtag like ask people on his podcast to tweet

at burt with like the hashtag burt is fat and it's taken on like it's gone like viral it's crazy like i heard uh burt kreischer on doug loves movies and he was saying that it's like getting to insane levels like uh burt posted a picture from a funeral or something like that and uh and like somebody's friend's mom died he went to the funeral and he posted something about it and then one of the comments was how'd she die did bert sit on it's fat he posted something about because it was like that whole thing where ab people are calling yeah he was like yeah i don't really feel bad for ab look at my app matches yeah it's pretty pretty yeah it was like it was trending on twitter it's like bird is fat like god damn that would even if you know it's a joke like that would hurt my feelings i heard him when i greg

fitzsimmons podcast and he actually said it was like yeah i know it's ridiculous and like at first it didn't bother me but now when i look at my twitter it's like this hurts yeah yeah because you post anything like hey here i am at the funny bone they're like yeah it's not so funny because you're fat jesus christ it was funny because like literally two days before i've said literally 20 times literally literally like uh literally two days before that whole thing blew up i was with bert at the dc improv oh yeah like there's actually uh on snapchat him asking me who's fatter i was like well i guess you are yeah but uh what's sad is burt and i actually discovered that we weigh exactly the same so this whole oh no bird is fat things makes me feel bad about myself like it has nothing to do with me and

somehow i've taken his top sagora thinks i'm. The whole world thinks I'm fat too by proxy, man. That's bullshit. That said, yeah, wear Burt his fat shirt all the time. And just be real casual. Like come into the green room with a sweater and be like, man, is it hot? Take it off. Reveal the shirt. Wear it all three nights.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, yeah, if you want to podcast with him, I'll give you the mics. But I'm going to take the recorder with, if you want to podcast with him, I'll give you the mics, but I'm going to take the recorder with me and then try to podcast with my buddies because I'm going on the trip with my friend Mike, my friend Scott. And so that's Scott Macklin. Good kid.

Good kid. Solid head on his shoulders. It really is. Jewish fella. I don't hold it against him. I've decided to embrace it. Me either. He's I love that guy.

He listens to the show. He might be listening right now. Hey, Scott to embrace it. Me either. I love that guy. He listens to the show. He might be listening right now. Oh, hey, Scott. He's a good kid. Hey, Chin Yang. I don't remember. I think I can't watch. Okay, racist. I forgot his name.

Hey, General Sal. Whatever your name is. That actually, you don't name your episodes. Hey, General. Hey, General Sal. Yeah, we can leave. That's so funny. Salute, General Sal's in the house.

This guy loves you long, Dan. This is getting racist. Getting racist. That was Josh Katerna. Hey. No, I'm excited for that. I'm excited for the trip and anybody that i can get i'll just record like sort of uh if you're listening to this show it'll sound like the greg barrett episode where we just put like a recorder in the middle of the room but yeah that'll be

that'll be really good so uh greg barrett also said anytime you're in la to hit him up but i don't think i'm going to maybe i don't know what would uh that'd be weird though right i don't think so yeah all right yeah well i mean what's it gonna hurt that's true yeah i could just tweet at him be like is it gonna affect your relationship with him like yeah maybe he was a previous guest that offered a nice thing it's not like yeah yeah you're not gonna ruin i don't know if it's one of those things where he's just nice to everybody though so i hear he's a very nice man yeah dude he was so cool could not have been nicer and that was one of my uh i was supposed to do that weekend i got switched to another weekend

oh right i was supposed to middle and then i beat i was with nick topalo which isn't a downgrade yeah he's great but yeah yeah the greg baron i just heard he's such a good dude yeah he was really nice to uh to mike and i it was cool and then yeah so i went to I just heard he's such a good dude. Yeah, he was really nice to Mike and I. He was cool. And then, yeah, I saw him at the show later, and he was like, yeah, come back, come back. He was really nice to everybody in the green room. Yeah, I heard he just talked to Anthony Davis, was just talking to him for an hour after the show.

It's like he'll talk to any open miker or just fan of comedy. I dig it, Anthony Davis. What? Yeah, he'll just talk to any piece of of shit that's not even how i meant it but you know hey hey he's in la you should get him on the podcast you think i could hit him up yeah i think you can hit him you could definitely tweet at him and hear back and he'll share that tweet via facebook memory absolutely the memories no he's a good guy he's a good kid he's a good kid uh no yeah i'm excited for that and catch up with a bunch

of people out there and uh yeah if you record with tom we'll release that another dig sesh banner that'll be good and uh yeah man i think that's i think it's about it if there's anything you want to plug oh no just the mcgoobies dates yeah what are those uh it's the first weekend in august i think it's the fourth through the sixth is that what the that makes sense the first is the month is monday okay yeah it's that that week and then just uh that mike finazzo.com the mike finazzo on twitter you can find out about the movie screenings and any stand updates i have fucking hey man and uh yeah uh my big thing uh coming up like i said i'll be in la so anybody listening uh i have friends out there to tweet at me holler at me please um and uh yeah yeah come to uh come to hot tub on august 1st at the at the virgil in la it's at eight o'clock very excited

for it and uh yeah go to digressionsessions.com or digressionsessions Facebook page and share episodes on iTunes, Stitcher, all that stuff. Follow me on Twitter and Instagram. I'm at Josh Kaderna on both of those platforms.

Synergy, Michael. Synergy. But, yeah, I'll try to interview some people while I'm out there without being too thirsty or too needy. Actually actually a friend of mine that i know um he played uh in uh in bands in annapolis that i was a big fan of growing up and uh still like stay in touch and have mutual friends and stuff and it's like uh he's like yeah coming out to la my friend uh ian's out there he's

a comedian and i was like ian carmel he's like how did you know that and i was like i just took a guess i don't know so i was like do you think he'd want to do a podcast he's like i'll ask so that's cool that'd be a great guess yeah brooks wheeland gave me his phone number when we did a show did i tell you about that yeah you did yeah yeah so maybe i'll hit him up i don't know we'll see i or i might just yeah what the fuck does it hurt to just ask yeah the worst that they're gonna do is ignore you are rules different in la are you supposed to act like people aren't famous um or popular i mean i think you're gonna look the same level of neediness no matter

whatever way you approach it so right just go for it you are right what's the worst that's gonna happen yeah you're right like i hit up yoni wolf and he did the podcast see i don't even know who that is exactly he's uh he's in y i was i was really happy to talk to him that was actually a really good episode i don't know why i was exactly who he was yeah but it was a that was a difficult interview um just uh because it was like so um to uh so why'd you record in texas he's, because we got a deal on it. I'm like, oh. Okay. What's the difference between this record and the last record? Nothing.

I write all of it. Oh. Okay. Well, thanks for spending time with me. But I would sincerely like to say, Michael, thank you for spending time with me. Thanks for hanging out, Joshua. Absolutely. We'll do more of these. Yeah, let's do it again we should you know and uh yeah look forward to the uh tom segura episode if you can get them if not we'll get burt kreischer on

skype to trash that would be great i bet you do it too um yeah that's a tweet we could definitely reach out we could possibly do that as like a two-part episode. Yeah. We could have a Thomas Fatt and a Burt. Oh, that would be good. I'll tweet Burt. I love it. Okay.

Yeah. Let's do it. All right. Well, yeah. Thank you everybody for listening. And yeah. David Ketter, take us out. Digression Sessions. Comma to an end. Thank you. Oh yeah, oh yeah