The Digression Sessions - Ep. 340 - Ice Ice Lazy

Episode Date: February 22, 2021

On this week's episode, Josh and Umar are back indoors after Umar got the flu shot twice.

it ain't gonna hurt all right are we recording yeah oh shit we're every goddamn podcast yeah i'm the podcast host it's like wait do we start i know do we start uh yeah we are we're podcasting indoors umar had his shots two shots shots. He's got both shots. He got the flu shot twice. Didn't get the COVID shot, but we're hoping that works, which it probably will. I wonder if that's happened to people, if they signed up for a shot thinking it was COVID and then they got the flu shot. Yeah, I got a shot. Do you get a flu shot?

I normally do. I didn't this year. I only got it when I had i had to for work so at work they would give them out for free and we have like a health center or whatever so i would just do it then like yeah so oh that's interesting they give it out because you guys aren't client facing no but i think i think it's just the federal workforce. They probably pay for most of it. You know what I mean? Right.

The government probably pays for so much of it that they're like, we'll give it to you for free. And then also, like, we want you to come to work. When I worked at Kennedy Krieger, you know, it's kind of like it was upstairs was a clinic, and I worked in a research lab where we work with children with autism. So we had to get the COVID or the flu vaccine yeah and um if you didn't you had to wear a specific kind of like thing on you like a purple badge or something and you had to wear a mask during

flu season you had to wear a yellow star of david which was weird so weird so weird but you had to wear a mask like if you refuse they're like actually this train's gonna take you home you don't need to drive home yeah put on this cover your big nose uh but we had to wear a mask and i just remember thinking i was like who the fuck yeah would wear a mask all day at work yeah and now it's because it was so foreign to me i was like that sounds also like everyone's just gonna be afraid of you because you're the only one wearing a mask because it looks intense too it's like yeah because you only ever see people like that when they're either like

super sick or somebody who's doing surgery yeah or asian but i was gonna say that and that too is like man look at them over there it's like overreact much i know exactly yeah that's so funny or but like now when you see normal stuff like watching a movie like a movie from a few years ago it's like here we are on the train in new york city i'm like look at all those people why like asses to elbows like i don't know when we get back to that people are still using the subways i know i know but like seeing like back in the day when there were no people are wearing masks on the subways. I know, I know. But like seeing like back in the day when there were no, people are wearing masks on the subways. I'm saying when you had like hundreds of people in a car.

I know. No masks, like touching everything, breathing. I mean, concerts are insane. That was a thing. Dude, think about like, yeah. And think about like a parent. So apparently people are just not getting sick you know like as much because no one's around each other oh yeah yeah yeah yeah and that's another thing about the flu apparently

the flu's not as bad because yeah yeah and then conspiracy theory theorists are like whoa whoa where'd it go i'm like we're inside motherfucker what do you mean where'd it go and that's why you wear a mask to reduce the transmission of all that stuff yeah that's why in those countries where they're like oh yeah i i don't want to try to get anybody else sick like also the the thought process to of like the community is bigger than me and i should make sure that i wear a mask and then like in america like fuck that i'd rather i will die i don't care crazy but the other i watched uh louis ck's hilarious special this morning and it's like probably he sums up like american culture so well throughout the whole special just like yeah how much we complain like he was talking about how we that's the one in the round right no no no that's oh my

god hilarious was the one first after hit like the first one after his divorce. Oh, I thought Chewed Up was that one. Oh, no. He was still married. Chewed Up was about his kids. Yeah. And then divorce. And then it's just him talking about how we complain about the dumbest shit. And one of the most brilliant bits is people complain about...

They're like, Oh, the ATM. There's a Spanish version. like when you call like a uh a help desk yeah it's like english pakistan yeah yeah yeah and he's like and i just hang up every time because not because i hate talking to people from asia but yeah i don't want to complain about my dumb white people problems to a lady who like doesn't have clean water you know where i'm like yeah well i booked a flight and now it's't have clean water you know where i'm like yeah i booked a flight and now it's delayed and i want a new flight i'm like god that's so good he's just

like talking about like being in a coffee he's like i was in a coffee shop in england it was an afghani coffee shop and it's just like the energy like the language is like so you know he's impersonating them and it was like he's like then you go to an american coffee coffee shop and i was just like oh whatever oh i like that it's just like god it's so good yeah that was a great special i loved maybe he didn't do it on a special but he did it on conan where he was talking about um the internet not working on the plane yes and he's just like what the fuck the whole plane's where i don't have internet he's like you're asshole you're flying in the sky

yeah you're upset about something that you that doesn't work that you just learned existed 20 seconds ago right right like oh we have internet on here oh why is it not working yeah so that that's in that special but he expands it right right right but yeah no he was so good at that and then i thought it was that special in the round but yeah the one after it where um yeah oh my god at the end where he does like the but if yeah maybe that bit's so good guys let him back my god i all i've been doing is watching uh and i've been watching old louis ck on paint like doing conan and leno and letterman and you're just like fuck he was so fucking funny he was on fire and so thoughtful prolific he was good so i think leno i think he had my favorite one on leno but it made me think about this because it's funny

because it is so dated now. Like those things were almost 15 years ago. Some of them, some of them were 20 years ago. Oh, especially the Conan stuff. But I just think about how like when you're, I wonder if I'm older and if I have kids or when I'm like, I don't know, know around like nieces nephews or something yeah and i'm just like oh guys this is real comedy and you're just like guys this is an old fucking white guy what the fuck are you talking about who cares yeah because like we know when parents do

that to you yeah oh yeah yeah yeah like just like my dad loves grand funk railroad what is that it's a band he's just like he'll put it on. He's like, now that's music. Yeah, exactly. You don't want to be that person. But you kind of have to be. No. Not always, but you're going to have, like, you're still going to like the music you like now and stuff. You can like it, but you don't want to.

I don't want to grow up and be that guy who is telling kids, like. Oh, I'm not saying. This is good. This this is real stop yeah exactly like it's yeah it's it's weird how every single person they stop making good music when you were 35 when you stop being a teenager you're like that was it yeah or when you get out of touch with shit that's why like some stuff i'm like i don't know what this is i guess it might be good but there's so much fucking music now too that it's like they have all the uh like a lot of hip-hop now is like kind of very emo-y and i'm like yeah i don't know what this is there's a lot of like dancey stuff and i'm like all right enjoy like everybody has a face tattoo that's what made me feel old i'm like

what are we doing with the face tattooats yeah the face tattoos are wild because you sound old you're like what are you doing well dude and that's how like that's like the evolution also where we drew the line like back in my day you got a neck tattoo and that was good enough we were talking about this last night like because uh uh well we have to get into that deeper into the pod but yeah i heard a friend of yours uh did mushrooms a friend of mine did mushrooms yeah uh and um so we were talking about we were talking about this conversation i was just saying i don't want to be that person yeah the older person that's like this is real comedy or music or movies uh and just let the kids like you just have to understand that you

just don't get it anymore yeah exactly i've i've made my peace with some of that stuff i'm like ah it's fine yeah for sure the simpsons had the best take on it it was homer and barney when they were young and then uh homer's dad comes in and he's just like what are you listening to and they're like it's rock and roll dad you won't get it it's cool you're not he's like i used to be cool and i was with it and then they change what it was and now i find what it is to be scary and weird yeah yeah it just happens to every generation for well also well for us a little bit it's very interesting because this happens to me every time i go visit karen's friends because they're all older than me and they were um all karen you know she was she's a snob

she's like really cool everything blah blah blah but a lot of her friends like weren't and so her friend's husband super cool guy yeah he's so into hair metal like that was his scene and so he'll show me hair metal stuff and i have to like pretend to think it's cool oh no but it's also funny because i'm like dude i was like a kid who actively sought out bands that weren't mainstream you know so most older people will always like this it's just like yeah they were like the biggest bands in the world right uh yeah i don't know like how much did you actually give a shit about music yeah yeah it's also just like yeah ever hear of a little band out of liverpool called the beatles yeah they were incredible

it's like oh hot take i know yeah it's just so dumb to say like, man, I love the role. It's like, of course, that's of course, you know, and we all know who they are. Yeah, there's a lot of drinks out there, but mine, the one that keeps me alive is water. Ever heard of it? I like water a was like, man, I was watching Lincoln the other day. And it's crazy just how racist people were. Okay. First, when you said Lincoln, I was like, is he saying that short for Lincoln Park? Because we were talking about music. Like, yo, I was watching Lincoln. Oh, that came up last night.

Last night was insane. Oh, I'm sure. For your friend. just a dumb sentence it's like oh people were racist during a time where our country was literally fighting over whether or not we should keep slaves it was two countries yeah yeah it's like man we were racist wow we were this racist and so apparently there was like a really i haven't seen the movie i've seen it and there is a very woke guy who's like evan described him i gotta stop saying like evan's mom listens to our podcast hey she was like can you tell umar to stop saying like it's so distracting i say it all the time even i when i don't need it. Same. Oh. Yeah.

Even now I'm trying not to say. Now I'm trying not to. I'm trying not to. Evans mom, you're fucking up my flow. Like, come on, Evans mom. Yeah. I'm sorry. Chill.

No, I'm just kidding. This podcast almost got your son canceled. Okay. So, and he said, what is the modern day? Oh, so this Bernie Sanders woke guy would say things. Such as? Such as that, you know, like his argument for slavery was like this impassioned. We got their human beings, blah, blah, blah.

But everyone's like, dude, no one. You can't say like that can't be your argument because no one gives a shit oh yeah you can't go from having a group of people who are slaves and you think they're literal like demons or whatever you think they are and then going to just respecting them as equals uh-huh so he had to like reframe his argument and like it's better for the economy or whatever i don't know who this guy came over the guy's name but so we were thinking like what is the modern day like what are we holding on to that is gonna be like oh fuck we were wrong oh hmm i don't know i mean i guess i feel like in sticking with that like racism is always going to be a thing like anything that we think is okay now like yeah i mean like the same way i if your grandpa was like so there was a negro man at the at the giant like and you're like whoa but it's like that was the preferred term or you know

what i mean like for sure but like us specifically like yeah our peer group where we think we're woke but there is going to be something you know that i think like saying gay saying oh yeah even though but people still do it yeah i'm out on that though yeah i i am uh it's it's tough because i was out on it for a while and um you start listening to all these podcasts and it's that lingo seeps into your fucking yeah lexicon yeah well what what happened was i think a lot of people stop saying that and then once you reintroduce it it has its power again and you're like oh it's naughty it's funny yeah um yeah no because it is too it's just it really is just you're not supposed to say it and it just makes it funny

but yeah yes exactly i just don't want to get into it. Because yeah, same thing. You start saying it a little bit, and then you're like, ah, fuck. I don't want to. Right. And so I think that's one. Yeah, it's not a good look, I don't think. Not a good look.

I wonder if like zoos and that kind of stuff. Yeah. I mean, there's a bunch of people now that feel that way i think people have probably felt that way about zoos for decades now yeah of them being like prisons essentially for animals yeah i mean sea world they yeah they're not gonna do killer whale shows anymore right oh yeah yeah yeah um yeah i don't know we um we were watching uh there's a good movie on netflix it's called i care a lot i don't yeah don't ruin it i don't want to ruin it i started it but i was like karen wants to watch i was like

does this really happen i googled it sort of it's exaggerated right but i'm just like wow like even just old folks homes in general but yeah yeah we gotta explain it because the whole the whole movie just came out the whole conceit of the movie is that, well, there's more to it. But basically, this woman, she has an old folks home. And if people have dementia, if their doctors say they have dementia and they can't care for themselves, a judge can rule without that person being in the courtroom or having representation. A judge can rule that they are unfit to live by themselves and become a ward of the state. And then like their house is taken from them their possessions are taken from them and then

sold and it's insane that that crazy like yeah I don't know I think that's just at the top of my mind so we watched that last night and then I was like yeah old folks homes are kind of fucked up and like the way that they're we're talking about it like the way that we like speak to them like you have a good day?

Is that nice? Yeah, dude. That's why we have to normalize killing yourself when you get to a point where you can't. If someone has to... You're going to end it? Yeah. You're going to kill it?

Do you want to die? Yeah, I was talking about this with Evan too. I just said, dude, I don't... Because we were talking about having kids or not. Yeah. I was saying, you know, though, I talked to this woman one time, and she didn't have kids, and her biggest regret... It's a huge regret because she's single, doesn't have kids.

Gotta have somebody to take care of you. Has no one to take care of her yeah and she said you know you when you're young you think like oh well my friends will but your friends won't do it like family will no matter how close you are people yeah yeah yeah and so your friends are gonna be fucking i'm just like yeah dude just that sucks and uh and i was like yeah but we can also just kill ourselves a lot of people yeah but they say that but you won't do it because we have such a drive to live yes yeah and even then even because even now we can be like but you're old and your joints you're

gonna have arthritis you're gonna hate your life it's like even if you do you still ain't killing yourself no no way yeah but yeah i don't know what would be the thing yeah i think it's it's gonna be the same stuff of like just the evolving culture of what is deemed appropriate and inappropriate and then also what is seen normal now it's like well that was actually kind of racist because it's like it's always progressing you know even even stuff now with like saying like this is cisgendered. I remember when I first heard that I was like, what the fuck is it? You know, and like being I, I feel like I'm a progressive person.

But yeah, it's going to keep moving in a way where I don't know when I'm old and be like, what? It's going to keep moving. But then also it's there's just people who are, I think, unreasonable. Yeah. I saw in a Hamden neighborhood Facebook group today. Dude, it's crazy. So there's this whole issue with, because it iced here, and apparently it's a law that you have to shovel.

So I know somebody that lives in an end unit yeah you got to shovel all of this because if someone falls out here who are you talking about just this person this person they'll sue that person what i noticed too was somebody near my friend's house near this cool guy that i know they iced every house and then stopped at his or they salted in front of every house and then stopped at his house that's so because they're probably like this guy doesn't help out you're the douchebag on the block listen maybe that guy was staying with your friends a douchebag my friend well so i oh man i i tried to buy salt at three different places yesterday and they were sold out like yeah i don't know where to get it um i wish i'm not gonna even be able to find it i'm gonna try to sum this up so you can also get ticketed to yes

it's your people people and i think people will call dude because if you're in this there's this hamden neighborhood facebook group so somebody posted something like hey if you're in this this this hamden neighborhood facebook group so somebody posted something like hey if you're uh people south of falls road on 37th shovel your sidewalks and then it turned into this whole fucking argument and blah blah blah like hey you don't know those people could be elderly or sick why don't you knock on their door and see if they need help? Interesting. And then this guy got triggered. He's like, you know what?

Fuck that. I walked to a pharmacy for a sick. I'm like, all right, man. Shut the fuck. You walked a half a block. No one gives a fuck. Yeah. And also, if it bothers you that much, just fucking report it.

Just shut the fuck up and report it or i don't know do it yourself walk in the goddamn street yeah but i get it people should it's the law he made this whole like i was in when i was in walgreens an elderly man came in he had fallen twice blah blah blah and um he's like ah my yard yeah it's all ice. And then I found this yard was full of marbles, and I fell again. And so, hey, that guy should have had kids and take care of them, or maybe he should have raised better kids that were there for him. But so then it turned to this whole thing of this older lady. I remember a time when Hamden, we used to take care of each other and people.

You know, I cleaned my alleyway,way my front yard in front of the street I don't see young people doing that I I miss the old Hamden then you know black people come in and they're like what the they're like well oh you mean when it was racist and all this shit that was coming and then this other guy made such a great point without being shitty. He's a guy in his 30s, but he's old Hamden. I was going to say, this is what I hate about that stuff, because it's so self-righteous. And you're not just trying to make a point. You're trying to make yourself seem better than the other person. Not only are you trying to make yourself seem better

you just you just want to be a cunt to somebody it's so right you want to seem better by putting them down bizarre like so this guy so you're on a forum made uh maybe it got deleted but it was wild. I could not stop reading it. I was reading it at like 12 a.m. And so this guy just made this like really, like he wasn't attacking anyone. He's like, you know, I hear this a lot. Whenever someone says I miss old Hamden, everyone always assumes it's, oh, because they're racist. Yeah.

And they never take into effect that like maybe they miss a time when um they they had more friends in the neighborhood or they hung out with people a stranger said hi to each other you probably knew all of your neighbors yeah like the house next to you the house across from you and so right and he's like and i understand why people say that but i i think it's just like not cool to always assume. And he just made like a really good argument. People were just like, fuck you. I don't know.

They were just like, it was, it just like went completely over everyone's heads. And like, literally he was being name called and it was crazy. Like this guy was, and he didn't even stoop to their level. And he was just like, Hey man, you got to talk. You got to talk however you want to talk. But it's,

you just should keep in mind, you know, not everyone's a racist that misses the way that how they grew up. Yeah. They also just want a community. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So funny. But yeah, the whole, this whole thread though is so antithetical to what they want if you actually wanted the person to do something like this is the same problem with posting shitty stuff or like screen capping and then sharing and be like look at this asshole it's like if you really think that they're messing up or you want somebody to correct their behavior the best way to do it is to go to them like like that person said, knock on their door.

Maybe they need help. And then if it's a person that isn't elderly, knock on their door and be like, hey, by the way, we'd appreciate it if you shoveled. Versus in a public forum to be like, you're a shithead and actually I'm the best. Yeah, and it just seemed like this guy would have been so open to having a real conversation about,

hey, this is why people feel weird when people white people say i miss old hamden yes you know yeah and to be fair you know young people are cunts you know they don't shovel their goddamn sidewalk in front of their house yeah listen some of those cunts they might be staying with their girlfriend for a few days that's true and they they missed that window to shovel. Yeah, I think the post got deleted. It was so volatile. And I'm like, this is crazy.

Yeah, and it's happening in a Hamden group thread where it's like, we need to have a better community. Meanwhile, they're like, fuck you, blah, blah, blah. It's like, how is this helping or like right going towards the goal why at all crazy dude yeah i don't look at any of that stuff man yeah it's real well there yeah it's i'm in there because sometimes you can get like helpful like hey uh i need a good plumber or something so that shit's cool but yeah other than that it's worthless yeah no i do feel bad about the snow i usually do my neighbors like right in

front of them because they are elderly so i'll clean their stuff up yeah i think so it's it's snowed twice now and so the first time i missed it too because i was or my friend was saying that his girlfriend um so missed it then like stopped back uh at my house and then yeah i'm pretty sure my neighbors they remember i think they said they've been here since like the 70s or holy shit they've been here a long time that's crazy um so they're elderly um and i stopped here just to like get my mail um oh by the way i have informed delivery from the post office uh mary showed it to me it's great you get an email showing you like a scan of the mail you're getting that day weird what do you do with that uh it's just great so you know if you have like

some important thing you're like oh it's coming today like i'm waiting to get my escrow check back so you can see the mail you're getting that day and you're like nice miss me with that cool so i had a thing coming that i wanted to get stopped to get the mail and i rarely see uh the woman that lives next door she's very nice but like you can tell she's like kind of shy yeah and so she came out and she was shoveling and i was just like i gotta go um but like in front of my house was done and i shoveled like a little bit i think the next day but i had to go yeah but in that moment she came out and she was shoveling a little bit and it was all ice so it's like you can't even yeah yeah um but i was like hey how you doing like literally have my car parked illegally with flashers of just like saying,

hi, grab my mail and going to jump back in. She's like, Oh, good to see you. I, I just, um, I just wanted to say thank you. Did you do this? Like pointing to the front of her house. And I was like, no, I'm sorry. But I usually do. I tried to do that, but I just wasn't home.

Yeah. Like it was just shitty for her to be like, thank you for doing this. I'm like, I didn't do that. She's like, oh, well. Yeah. People kind of have this, like, college roommate mentality sometimes with shoveling snow. So, like, on my block, just my little block, there's, like, six homes or five homes. Yeah. Everyone shovels in front of their home except for one family uh-huh but they're young you know and so like in my head

i'm like fuck these people they don't do it i'm not doing it so like everyone will shovel they so then there was just this ice in front of their home and i'm like do you not feel bad do you feel bad what are you trying to say because i'm surrounded by ice yeah i try to get salt hey man what are you gonna do but where's the salt i don't know it's like crazy because they it's just so weird i'm like do they think like ah someone will do it you know oh it's weird i don't get it right now i'm like son do your job they have a child too so it's like i don't know you don't own a shovel it's weird here's the thing uh maybe they're just waiting for the sun to melt yeah oh here's another thing i don't know if you're a fucking adult buy a goddamn ice scraper thing for your car i saw a dude who lives uh like across the alley he's like a weird

guy anyway but he's my our age maybe older yeah this motherfucker pulled his jacket sleeve over his like hand and he's like like put like trying to like push the snow off with his fucking arm off his car i'm like dude it's ten dollars i see you smoking weed every day in the alley yeah fucking well what's he supposed to do dime bag less of weed i know and untenable it's i have it's nuts i've seen people use cookie um trays and shit i'm like it's like a scraper what are you doing okay listen you're you're blaming uh somebody that's not at fault here like for me you're like shouldn't you get rid of that ice shouldn't the sun be melting it harder true shouldn't joe biden issue another stimulus check so that you can get dime bags and an ice

scraper that's what i'm saying oh man speaking of that movie have you seen the the the britney spears doc no everybody's talking about it, though. It's very good. Is it? Yeah, I liked it. Okay. It's on the Hulu. It's on Hulu.

Yeah. New York Times did it, and it's about her conservator... Conservatorship? Conservatorship. Yeah. About how her dad is holding her... Like, manages her life. Dude, it's crazy, because i remember being a child when

i was like in fifth grade when her first single came out yeah and you're like she's like she's so fucking hot so hot but also just this the biggest thing on the planet at that time and like had several hits and you're just like but then you're you see just like she was probably miserable the whole time oh yeah i mean she's the classic case of having the stage mom like because she was in the mickey mouse club and all that shit and yeah as much as kids are say they want to act or whatever it's like somebody has to drive them to all these things right make sure they're doing all that shit so like yeah i think from a very early age she was probably fucked up like in a way that she wasn't aware of like to me that's kind of abuse yeah like you better audition get mickey mouse club because mom needs cigarettes britney you know the part that really like

kind of hits home with you or you i remember when she was having her like mental breakdown yeah and like shaved her head and just the way everyone talked about it like we thought it was hilarious like as a society right we all were just like oh this bitch is crazy right so that's what i mean like in society like everything just keeps moving like if that was done now no way no way yeah be like yeah help her she was helped a couple people like craig ferguson and michael moore who were like hey how about you guys just not talk about it yeah yeah and you also get it too it's like she never had because she the the thing was always like well if you're rich how come you have problems like she never got to be a human being ever exactly and then also being like that sexualized so young well that's another thing like i even remember that being young and she would be asked by reporters all imagine being okay she's

16 17 years old yeah and you're essentially reporters they're strangers yes then in a room full of i don't know 50 to 100 people she's sitting at a table and they're like excuse me 16 year old girl yeah has a dick been inside you at all and if not when yeah exactly and was it justin timberlake was it justin timberlake because that would be fun yeah yeah that's fun unbelievable could you imagine asking a teenager if she's had sex and you're not her fucking family even that's even that is weird yeah but yeah i mean imagine just being a dad like jif sex yeah you have sex question yeah you're the dinner table excuse me all right carl for the dad time uh yeah we watched uh we watched a documentary on uh only fans oh i tried to watch that's on

hulu and uh yeah they were showing i think they showed something like christina aguilera's stuff where they were like talking about how like sexualized stuff in the culture and like i just felt bad for her too remember christina aguilera's song dirty yes and all that video man the boners of course but then also i'm like how old is she at the time like 20 like just being surrounded by just men they're like here's your brand you're a slut yeah yeah like it's not like she chose that they're like we're gonna get your tit implants and you're a whore. Well, it's funny because they all start out the same.

The boy bands and the girl. First, they're young, so they're like, you're innocent. Yeah. And then it's like, we're going to recreate your image, and you're a fucking slut. Yeah, exactly. It's crazy. She's 21. And that's where your value is.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's yeah people want to fuck and then they have to go on trl like look i'm just an independent woman and i'm just out here doing my own thing and yeah like when you watch that too like watching trl when i was like 13 and you don't really like you're like she's like an adult but now i'm 34 i'm like she was like 22 yeah she was a child yeah and then there's this whole mechanism of like her management team, record label, everything. It's like, how we're going to make money with you is you being slutty. Like, that's insane to do that to a child, essentially. It seems like Pink kind of came out.

Wow, she had her issues, right? Yeah, I mean, yeah. She seemed like she's doing, just level-headed. But we don't know. Yeah, but even Britney Spears, Iars i remember i don't know when i guess maybe like a year ago or whenever but i remember seeing a thing of like something about her instagram or something have you looked at those yeah so here's the thing i wanted to get to oh yeah her instagram's dark you watch her instagram yeah she is hot on her instagram but she sounds like a child sounds like a child her the look in her eyes is weird weird and you're like i'm not saying she

shouldn't be in control of her own life but how bad would everyone feel if she got out of her conservatorship or whatever harmed herself lost all her money you know what i mean yeah i mean it's also you don't know the person's situation i don't know what like how does a conservator conservatorship work where is she taking meds that she shouldn't be is she like over medicated because that's what i thought that was just like a blank it could be yeah exactly like i get a lot of questions of what my favorite candy is i love reese's peanut and i'm like dude you're like almost 40 now right crazy yeah it's almost like she regressed because yes she used to be like a coherent person person yeah she sounded just like at her age or whatever yeah yeah now

you're just yeah man it's not great yeah not good even the other michael jackson stuff he's like i love children like that was worse because there was absolutely some probably molestation going on but like yeah when you're like robbed of your childhood you're just trying to get it back to you know man crazy god uh no so i haven't watched that watch the the OnlyFans thing. That was nuts. Did you get to the woman that was her mom was like, maybe I should manage you.

I'm like, oh my God. No, I watched like 10 minutes. I was like, ah, this is what I thought it was. Yeah, it's like you didn't learn a ton, but it was interesting to see. But yeah, one chick she was making she's like i want to make ten thousand dollars a month and that's like where she got to and i'm like

jesus christ but then she was she was saying she's like yeah everybody like thinks that i'm like uh i had like a bad childhood she's like i love my mom and then they're like at lunch together and she's like yeah i think i'm about doing this scene and her mom's like i think that's great you're doing so good maybe i should manage you i'm like this isn't healthy there's no way no this is bad dude i social media has to hit like a threat we must be so close to that threshold where are we ever just going to be like all right this was a mistake you know like we should look at social media like cigarettes and like nuclear weapons. Yeah, maybe that's because it's so fucking unhealthy. And then when you see our peers do shit and it's so bad, you're like, dude, we're fucking adults.

Like, what are you guys spending your energy on? Yeah, like i stopped looking at it for like a little bit but yeah i feel better when i don't but then i also feel weird doing stuff and then be like oh i should post this i should share this i'm like why what's a constant struggle yeah what for what what like what like i'm having a good time but does it matter if i don't get 100 likes on this fucking thing? Oh, yeah, dude. It's nuts. It's weird.

We all hate influencers. We make fun of influencers, but we use social media like we want to. Why are you showing me you brushing your fucking teeth in the morning? I don't give a fuck. Oh, me? It's because I use Sensodyne, actually. It's really good for my gum health. Why are people brushing their teeth?

It's fucking insane. I just don't get it. We all make fun of it, and then we do it. Yeah, same, where it's like, yeah, we're like, oh, you're just doing this for likes? It's like, that's what everybody's doing. It's ridiculous. It's almost like us cherishing Monopoly money and you know, like in acting as if it mattered, if it's real. But it is connected to that fucking serotonin drip.

And then I guess it gives you some sort of social capital. Right. It gives you like it's so I remember being young and everyone's like, oh, that's so like people used to throw that phrase around so much. Like, oh, that's so like people used to throw that phrase around so much. Like, oh, that's so high school. And I'm like, maybe that's just how humans are. We're like, yeah, we care about being liked. We want to be in the in group. We always blah, blah, blah.

So it just evolves to the in right. The in group becomes the woke crowd. The in group is like, you got to shovel your fucking sidewalk here. Yeah, but oh, oh i mean drive 45 minutes outside of the city no one gives a shit about any of it but then also but they're all on instagram though right and then that in group is like you better have your maga hat and wear your camo and all that shit you know what i mean like everybody has their thing where it's like i won't be fucking cool but that's the thing because uh whatever your parents do is uncool.

So if kids grow up watching their parents making TikToks, won't they just be like, what the fuck is my mom doing? Maybe. I don't know. We can't even know what social media is going to be in 20 years. You can't even know what it's going to be in five years. I know. Like five years ago, you weren't like, TikTok, that's going to be in 20 years. You can't even know what it's going to be in like five years. I know. Like five years ago, you weren't like tick tock.

That's going to be a thing. Or like, I don't know, like the mask dancer. I don't understand how that's a show on TV where it's a celebrity that's dancing and you don't know who it is. You have to guess who they are, but I'm just saying like,

then like tick tock dancing to him. Like, I don't understand why that's a thing. You know, like, here's TikTok dancing too. I'm like, I don't understand why that's a thing. You know, like if here's me doing the dance of this song, we don't know what social media is going to be. And then people will do this thing too. Like,

so like TikTok right now is like what everyone thinks is going to break them. And it's the new hot thing, right? Oh yeah. Some people are making a lot of money off of it, but I kind of look at it as like Bitcoin or crypto. Like it's too late, right? People jumping on it now on Bitcoin?

I don't think so. Unless you have the money. I don't have the money to buy Bitcoin. You don't have to get a whole one, though. I know, I know. But I think it is. So I think it's still anytime. Maybe. It's like in the late 80s being like, should I get Apple But I think it is. So if you... I think it's still anytime. Maybe.

It's like in the late 80s being like, should I get Apple? I missed the boat. I saw an article the other day. Someone put a picture of it. It was like, looks like the internet fads over. Billions of people are leaving the internet.

Yeah, there's all kinds of stuff. Yeah, there's... I remember there was footage of Katie Couric and Brian Gumbel being like, the internet? What is that? Yeah. yeah there there's i remember there was footage of katie quirk and brian gumbel being like the internet what is that yeah but it's just like any other thing like a bunch like some like when you see a handful of people making money off of it then when everyone goes there yeah done so like with instagram like comedians that's what we did like so andrew schultz made whenever you see a comedian with like the title and then the captions andrew schultz made that popular oh yeah and then everyone started doing it and now

no one gives a shit about it oh yeah those videos don't matter anymore dane cook to myspace yeah like he was the king of myspace and no one cares right and so like the other day my buddy sent me a message like oh this person got like 500 uh likes uh likes or views on their tiktok and i'm like yeah it doesn't matter anymore it does millions don't matter there's we know people who have millions of views on their youtube specials no one gives a shit no one cares yeah so that's the thing it's like it all keeps it like the chance of you using that to propel yourself is the time window is so small. Like you always have to be looking for that next thing and you're just so exhausting. Yeah, I don't want to do that. Yeah, that's why I'm like, I'll post stuff here and there and i have to like check myself or i'm like i do like it but yeah i also don't have to be like man this is the post it's gonna go viral

or whatever like that's stupid but that's what was so funny about watching louis ck's hilarious because he has a big chunk about how like now cell phones are ruining kids and people in society and when he filmed that i think that was like 2009 it wasn't nearly yeah what it was that bad yeah and even back then he could recognize just like how fucking shitty i think maybe iphones had just come out maybe they've been out for two years yeah and the only social media we had like facebook was just really breaking twitter yeah but man great like crazy that um it was such a problem then and now it's even i mean it's beyond it's just insane yeah like our kids are gonna be part robot like they're probably gonna have holograms coming out of their phone. Like,

no, like you guys used to watch stuff on screens. Like I bet their shit's going to project it. Like we, you don't even know what the fuck it's going to be. Yeah. Like the same way, like trying to explain to like your grandparents of like,

do you know what this is going to be? I know dude. It's wild. I have no fucking clue. It sucks. Uh, yeah, but it's just a part of everything.

Yeah. Like it's not going back. Yeah. No, there's no yeah but it's just a part of everything yeah like it's not going back yeah no there's no way that it's no way change or anything so so yeah it is wild how much social capital is put into it but i don't know i yeah i find myself being like i don't want to do it then i'm like well i want to check i want to see what this Then I'm like, well, I want to check. I want to see what this is. Well, dude, like I did a I was doing a show last. We got to talk about that. But I did that show at Tally Ho Theater in Leesburg, Virginia. And I was talking to our buddy Lafayette, who's a super funny DC comic.

Yeah. And he does colleges. Yeah. And so he drives to colleges to do these gigs like all the time. Yeah. He makes most of his money. Yeah. He has a college agent and stuff. Yeah yeah and he was telling me to get one and i i looked into it

but i don't think it's i don't think i'm trying to like perform to like three people you know oh i don't want to do it could be a nightmare he told me about that too he's like you should try to get it like yeah it's just it's funny it's like somebody that has i don't know somebody that has like a ferrari being like you should get a ferrari yeah yeah yeah no it sounds nice if i didn't have to do x y and z to get it sure uh but he was on his way to a gig in delaware and his car broke down and so he called an uber made it to the gig got his the the tow he got the tow truck to come yeah take his car then the uber came blah blah blah imagine dealing with that like how do people deal with that without a cell phone oh yeah yeah yeah do you just hope that somebody stops and helps you yeah walk to a gas station yeah tow truck i mean yeah hitchhike all that stuff but yeah i mean

back in the day yeah like if you got in an accident you're like well fuck uh give me your information and i hope to i hope this phone number is real you know like oh yeah i don't know how the cops show up either back then because you're like well i'll call 9-1-1 like who's doing that it's bizarre um also i like um everything you have to do through pay like the snail mail paper it's holy shit like yeah everything's so i remember answering machines to being like i hope i don't miss a phone call or like or like one i remember being like so mad as a kid if like my friend called and i was like fuck i missed it yeah when you're in like middle school or something yeah oh man oh dude but i did these cool gigs last week yeah so i was in we didn't get to talk about it because we had a guest last week yeah uh listen to that one everybody if you yeah it was a good one. That was very fun. But so Tim Miller.

Yeah. It's weird because all these things like you do like all these for me, it seems like these shows come in like clusters clusters. And then there's like a month where you don't do any shows. Yeah, it's crazy. So I got to do like I was supposed to do a Wednesday night to Friday night and a sunday night uh but the friday got canceled because of snow and kind of thank god because ramin was booking our buddy

ramin was booking these yeah car drive-in yes shows where people are in their cars and honking if they think it's funny yeah now. Now, maybe it's fun. I don't know. But that doesn't seem fun. It was a six o'clock or five o'clock show and you had to be PG. Doesn't seem fun. And Ramin was like, you have to be PG because I signed a contract. And I was like, fuck, dude.

I was like, I'll try. Already that answer there is not great. You need to be squeaky clean. Ah, fuck. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Fucking shit, man. that answer there is not great you need to be squeaky clean ah fuck yeah exactly yeah fucking shit man it's tough especially during a pandemic pandemic where you're not performing a lot so well it's also tough because you're not getting immediate feedback either so you're like kind of

just rambling in the ether right like ah so what what the fuck you know i mean i'm bombing it's so easy to throw in cuss words there for sure so that guy but anyway so on wednesday uh mark norman was coming to royersford my buddy chris allen like normally opens for him he's like hey let's go hang out i'm like all right fuck it who cares and then he's like oh dude mark said we can do time i'm like even better nice uh so it's two hours away it's 40 minutes like outside of Philly. And this guy, Soul Joel, has set up like an outdoor dome,

essentially. It's like probably a $20,000 setup. Insane amount of heaters. You bring your own chairs. You bring your own boots. It's outside. It's so cool. And the dome's open on,

it kind of looks like a, like a festival tent or something. Yeah, like a hand, like where you park a on it kind of looks like like a uh like a festival tent yeah like a hand like where you park a plane kind of yeah like a big one like if you ever see it like bonnaroo sometimes banjo playing it's like a massive kind of tent yeah it's open on both ends so it's safe and whatever it was like the heaters yeah so it looks very cool chris was gonna drive up from charlottesville virginia and stay at my place. And then we were going to drive from there and all. But the snow, he was like, we woke up and I was like, dude, it's going to snow a lot. Yeah.

He lives in a weird, you know, he lives almost in the country. So he's like, fuck, I can't come. And I was like, he's like, I texted Mark and told him we can't make it. And I was like, well, yeah, I can still make it. He's like, you should go. And so I was like, yeah, fuck it. I'm going to go. So I told Mark, I was like, hey, man, I'm still down to go. He's like you should go and so i i was like yeah fuck it i'm gonna go so i yeah i told mark i was like hey man i'm still down to go he's like good i need some brown

so i go and it was like a two hour the drive there was easy and like you get there there's like over 200 people at the show yeah so fun you're just hanging out we're eating pizza and wings and the best part is you're just talking so much shit like hey what do you think about this what do you think about that blah blah blah and uh i got to do 20 minutes killer sets everyone like murdered on that show nice and um yeah because that is the thing about these outdoor shows that uh are non uh honking shows where it's like we actually have people outside those people want to be at the show yes like you're not a passive participant like you want to have fun you're engaged and you're a comedy fan because you like you have to be kind of in the know to know about

that place you know yeah yeah yeah that's why i always think like um crowds in like a basement bar show are better than comedy club crowds a lot of the times because it depends who the comic is that you're working with but most of the time comedy club crowds to me are like people who are just like it's something to do versus i really like comedy it's yeah it's very general in a way where you're not like oh i like this person it's like i like comedy and they're a comedian yeah with that audience you're like i don't know if you're comedy club crowds honestly like chicken fingers better than comedy because it's wild you'll uh like a couple weekends ago when i was at mcgoobies i did my set and i wanted to watch tony woods the

headliner yeah i'm just standing in the back by the sound booth. Dude, most people in the back row are not paying attention. They're all looking at their menus. They're talking to each other. They're eating. They're just so focused on eating food. They're not even looking at the stage. I'm like, God, something about this is so depressing.

It's dark. I mean, that's also why you get comedians that are middle of the road. They're like, you ever noticed men do this and whoa okay who's married they're like yeah i can relate to this exactly yeah exactly yeah that's who they're with they're like oh that's you brad i just want to be like why are you guys even here like you could have just went to a normal restaurant but this is like you're mixing it up it's like we're not just going to fucking uh outback steakhouse like we're gonna go to a show but they it up. It's like we're not just going to fucking Outback Steakhouse. We're going to go to a show.

But it's like seeing a movie that you're like, ah, Tom Cruise is in it. It's whatever. Really? Yeah. That blows my mind. I think it's just entertainment. But the same way, yeah, it is weird that they're like, well, I like comedy. And nobody goes to a show being like, I like music.

And it could be country. It could be hip hop. You know what I mean? Yeah. You're going to see a comedian where it's like they could be super raunchy they could be clean they could be a one line you know like there's so many different genres of comedy but it's not booked that way or like portrayed that unless it's in like a really corny way where they're like this guy's a menace so do those people because I always have this thought, like I was thinking like, are these women going to leave and say that was a waste of money and a waste of time?

Because if that's the case, it seems like. Who? What women? The women at Magoobies who were doing eating wings, not watching. Oh, okay, be like, dude, should we just leave? Like, you're not into this. We should just leave. Yeah.

But I think it's also like, what else are we going to do? Yeah. It's a novel, not novel that it's new, but it's like it's different enough from what you do. Right. And so, yeah. Anyway, so great. I mean, just the crowd. Because they're super focused.

So focused. They don't care if you're dirty, blah, blah, blah, like offensive. They loved it. Dude, Mark had so many great lines when he first came out because, like, you know, it's a very blue collar town. Yeah. Very cool people, though. Yeah, very like rural uh pennsylvania yeah you guys all look like you worked at gamestop but didn't touch the stock and like all that kind of shit i was like

fuck that's so good uh-huh yeah at one point he like pointed at one guy he's like oh you look like a little eco that still says the n word it's like it's okay motivates them and he's like he's like oh there's more car heart here than like a construction site. It was just like, yeah. Yeah. And they love it. It was so fun. And I was going to leave after my set because it was going to it was already snowing in Baltimore. Yeah.

But I was like, I got to hang out. This is so fun. Right. Big mistake. Huge mistake. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Huge mistake.

The ride home is like white knuckling the whole time. And I'm not good at driving in the dark as it is because I just can't see well in the dark. If it's raining or precipitating, normal night, I'm fine. Yeah. But when it's raining, oh, man. White knuckling. I white knuckle drive. Really? The drive zone for DCF white knuckled on 295 because 295 is so dark sometimes.

Oh, yeah. There's no lights there. But, yeah, if it's like torrential downpour and everybody else does it too. I saw it from DCF, White Knuckle on 295 because 295 is so dark sometimes. Oh, yeah. There's no lights there. But yeah, if it's like torrential downpour and everybody else does it too. Like, all right, I guess we're doing 20. And I've done it. Well, so that's the dude. So the way I took to get to the show, I wanted to avoid the tolls because I didn't have cash.

I was like, oh, man, I really because also, yeah, I didn't know if i was getting paid or not and i'm driving two hours bro well four hours round trip right four hours round trip right it works right and so i'm like i'm this is i thought i was gonna do five minutes and do a guest spot but he's like all right you're gonna do 20 you're gonna do 20 and but and then some kid got to do a guest spot. Nice. I was like, oh, sweet. I love how generous Mark is with that stuff. Very generous. And he paid me very well the next day.

Wow, very cool. Yeah, and he didn't tell me, you know, I didn't know or anything. Right, right, right. It also helps to be cool, too, because if you're a dick about, like, well, how much money am I getting and blah, blah, blah. Right, exactly, yeah. Like, if you're like, hey, like or even if i try to be passive aggressive i'm like oh i didn't sold joel didn't pay me you know oh yeah exactly too just like well i mean you know it's a four-hour round trip and snow i'm not getting paid so right like being shitty about it

yeah so oh real quick side note uh adam carolla was on um andrew santino's podcast really yeah and i listened to it because I was like, I haven't listened to him in a long time. He was actually fine. But for a majority of it, they talk about how vibe is the most important thing. Where like, because how me,

you and Tim were like, yeah, just be cool. Like it was so weird. It came out the same week of what we talked about. They're like, so much of this business, so much about life is just being cool.

Like, do you want to hang out with this person? Yes. Rip us off much? Yeah. Right. It just goes goes to show like that's really what it is too like if you're an asshole about it like oh yeah you're gonna be treated that way too yeah yeah and yeah exactly and so do that drive home so when i drove there i took all these crazy but i must have passed like seven small towns you know like seven main streets to avoid what the tolls god okay gotcha gotcha and actually it also might have been the fastest route during rush hour also you're you know taking all these weird roads

and uh oh man i had to i pee like every hour dude i, I have to pee so bad. But all these exits in Pennsylvania, you're not sure how much further you're going to have to drive to find a fucking gas station or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So anyway, whatever. Yeah, unless you can see the rudders from 83 or whatever you're on, then yeah.

So I'm driving home. Doesn't snow in pennsylvania at all once i get into maryland whole different story yeah i'm on 95 it's great like some parts of 95 only one lane isn't covered in snow some parts are like no lanes are cover or like there it's just like yeah or some some parts it's just all covered and i thank god i took karen's outback oh nice but even then like it's just so scary you feel your car slipping you're going feeling your car slide is terrifying on 90 and you're going you have a two-hour drive home and the majority of the time you're going only 40 fucking miles per hour you're like so pissed and you're yeah you're just like i don't want to get in an accident yeah then you have all these trucks just zoo like 18 wheelers just

zooming past you like yeah everyone hates you because you're... But there's also other people who are doing like 60 still in sedans. You're like, am I a pussy? Like, maybe I'm a pussy. Yeah. I couldn't imagine going faster than 45. The Outback is good for that. But it's also funny, too, when you find somebody else that has their flashers on. You want to give like a sign of solidarity, but you're both pussies.

So what do you do if you're just like, yeah, we're both. I know. Here's to being cautious i admire a little bit the confidence of people who are just like i'm driving yeah like it's not snowing but it's also like dude if you make one mistake you're fucked yeah and not other people not even a mistake if you just catch a patch of ice going straight you know i mean like that's just veer you off cray it was man it was a bummer but it was worth it yeah yeah no i mean it's yeah it's also funny to be like god it was a great show totally worth it

then on the ride home you're like is it am i i know and if you crash you'll be like i don't fucking care well so yeah that's the emotions like all the way there you're like this is so fun this is so exciting yeah we all talked about that we're all like man isn't that nice the ride over that feeling of like we're gonna do a cool show especially for like a show like if you're doing that for an open mic it's a whole different story like this is stupid yes and so and and that's that's another cool thing about mark like he is like a weirdo in like the sense that he just loves comedy yeah you know and he's just like god guys isn't this great like this is so fun i'm like it is yeah yeah it is fun and uh yeah and then uh

and i remember when i got off stage i was like that was so fun i was like it didn't even feel like i was outside it didn't it was 20 fucking degrees outside, bro. Yeah, yeah. I saw the steam coming off your head. I was sweating. Steam, yeah, steam. I got a video. Steam was coming off my head. Yeah. And I was like, yeah.

And he's like, yeah, that's the beauty about stage. Everything goes away. He's like, that's why I do it so much. Yeah. It's fully a drug. Such a drug. Absolutely. That's why you drive two hours to get your fix.

You're like, all right, it's worth it. Oh, for sure. And then so you get off like on the way there. You're like so fun. So cool. Get off stage. Totally worth it. Drive home.

Not worth it. Not getting paid. Fucked it. Yeah. Well, it was like it was a mix. And then in the morning when I woke up and I got a Venmo, I was like totally worth it. Yeah. And you made it home safe.

Like if you got in a fucking accident or something. Yeah yeah god damn dude um yeah no those those nights where you're like this is insane yeah i've i've had those two like i think speaking of like for like a ramin gig or something in like virginia where you're like all right the money is good and then you do have fun and you do forget about everything but then the ride home you're like i don't know if it's worth like i make good money 150 bucks is nice but what the fuck am i doing yeah exactly but it's yeah i know but it's um yeah i love those experiences though it is it's tough because i think at a certain point like a part of me was also like you it's nice to do things where you have like a story or something but um yeah i've totally been there like that's something that i told myself early in the pandemic i was like i should be more

selective but it's a weird thing where you can't really be selective because if people pick up on that they're just gonna be like fuck this guy there's other people who want it oh yeah you're too cool dude and that's too cool for school so i that's i sent you that bon appetit podcast oh i didn't listen to it but yeah you told me don't i mean if you want i couldn't get through it yeah so that's the weird thing about things like show business is there's no real boss and the people who in most cases, the people who work the hardest and are the most talented get most of the work. I know a lot of people don't believe that. Yeah, I don't know if that's always the case. It's not always the case, but I'm talking about like...

Or people who know how to play the game. Yes. Right? So like Bon Appetit over the summer. Yeah. Bon Appetit Test Kitchen, the food, they got canceled because this... That guy's... The editor-in-chief of Bon Appetit was like got caught

in what some people say is very offensive. I don't think it was that offensive, but I'm not Puerto Rican, but he dressed up as a Puerto Rican, right? Yes. Yeah.

And people said it was brown face, but I think he was just I don't think he put on bronzer. I think he did. Really? Yeah. All right. Even if he he did he had like a like a yankees but like we said everything changes so fast yeah i don't think people thought dressing up as a puerto rican was offensive in the early 2000s yeah i mean because we're making fun of britney spears having a meltdown what we talked about it i think when all this happened, too.

Like, there were pimps and hoes parties and stuff like that. You know what I mean? Like, nobody now would be like, oh, you think it's cool to be a pimp or to exploit sex workers? Yeah, for sure. And that was normal stuff of like, you dress as a pimp. That was a popular Halloween costume. So, this podcast that I love, it's one of my favorite podcasts. They did a whole three-part series on what happened with Bon Appetit, right?

Yeah, okay. And this woman who's doing this podcast is really condescending, and it's so biased. And I'm like, this isn't journalism. This is a hit piece. Right. And from being around something like comedy, I just felt like she was so she was talking about like it's a culture

where um they didn't help people rise up through the ranks and people literally were on a bottom floor and it's just like well yeah that's yeah they want to be essentially in something almost very similar to show business like oh yeah that's what it is lady like what the fuck do you you got to fucking dance like you got to work hard as fuck to get there you're not going to get paid well in the beginning you got to network people are going to every job people are going to talk to you like shit you know like dude people have talked to me in ways that like outside of comedy i would be like dude go fuck yourself oh yeah sure because we want those people we want those people to book us i hate that stuff too you just gotta let it go yeah and some people are like well that's a pussy move it's like okay well that's probably why you

don't get work and that's why you're broke yeah so i think that the that was sort of the culture there well also what they were working in though you were getting immediate feedback that's what i always wondered about those chefs because they all have individual shows but they're all under the bone appetite umbrella and so it's like we're on a team but you have your individual shows and then the scoreboards right there where it's like brad has two million views yeah you have 50 000 but you see it in like the open mic scene where there's a lot of comics who complain right and make assumptions because they think things are a certain way and they're not right and it's like well i'm not getting this because i'm not hate us and it's just i'm not in with that click it's like you guys just aren't

funny yeah that's it well that's that's kind of saying about like the videos where it's like brad's not watching the video two million times from two million different laptops you know like brad is yeah so brad's a white guy straight white guy and people are saying they propelled him and it's just like but his videos are better he's a better personality well that's what i'm saying you're funny as shit but you're but it's not like brad had his own channel they're all on the bone appetite youtube channel right are their specific one so i'm saying like if you subscribe to that feed you're getting all those videos yeah and you're aware of them but that's just tough where it's like bright and clear made the best videos but it's like if if for stand up every night there is a counter of how many jokes or like how many jokes landed or how many laughs you got yeah well there is it's called an audience

i i know but it's not oh yeah it's not tabulated it's not actually quantified yeah yes yeah yeah no it is you could say you did well but then you have those but it's not tabulated. It's not actually quantified. Yes. Yeah, yeah. No, it is. You could say you did well, but then you have those people. It's like, well, I would be if it was blah, blah, blah. But it's like, dude, the stats are on the scoreboard. If you're like, Brad has 2 million, you have 50,000.

Right. And so they were kind of saying like, so Adam Rapoport is a very, you know, this white guy. He was the editor, right? Went to like Oxford or Harvard, blah, blah, blah. And he got hired by bon appetit because they were struggling yeah he worked at gq and he turned that magazine around but he's like he hired all white people who are beautiful and rich and it's just like but and this is where it's like and they refuse to interview any um white person for the podcast

because they want to give space for the people of color yeah which is noble but it's like and they refuse to interview any um white person for the podcast because they want to give space for the people of color yeah which is noble but it's also like shitty in my point of view and like and i'm not white so i'll say it what yeah you're not you're not you tell me you're pakistani i'm gonna be upset yeah uh porter pakistanis are just puerto rican asians um puerto rican asian this picture you rubbing your hand yeah yeah but so i don't they're like and it's just like yeah but also dude it's like if this guy grew up rich but like his network is just white people it's not like he purpose. We don't know. You're assuming that he purposefully kept out people of color.

Or that's how your podcast framed it. Yeah. So then all this is happening. I stopped listening because I'm like, this is so biased. This is so annoying. Yeah. And it's an Indian woman telling this story. And she's on this podcast label started by like a very prominent person alex goldman or something and he started this thing called gimlet media so he left

like this american life super cool guy he ended up selling it anyway gimlet media's best show is reply all which is this one they're at the top it's two white guys and this indian chick uh is a part of that team yeah guess what they got accused of doing being good bosses doing the exact same fucking thing that happened at bon appetit that they created a culture at gimlet where they were the best they weren't helping um they were people of color mostly, except for this Indian woman. This other black guy and other people of color worked at this podcast network. And they were like, hey, this is like, we're not promoting people of color. We're not helping them. It's mostly white people who got the most attention.

They're getting most of the resources. Let's allocate this better. They weren't being listened to they started they tried to unionize this woman this indian woman tried to stop them from unionizing wow why and just saying like that you guys have it wrong this the union's gonna hurt this company and it's just like because you're at the top and you think that you got there because you worked hard. You probably did.

And they're not working as hard as you. But now you're writing a three-part hit piece on Bon Appetit. I mean, it's just, and this is what liberals do. It's mind-boggling. Yeah. It's, yeah.

The hypocrisy of trying to point out like, well, this is wrong in this case, except when it comes to me, it's fine yeah, the hypocrisy of trying to point out like, well, this is wrong in this case, except when it comes to me, it's fine. Crazy, dude. I mean, it's like, and that's the thing. It's the same. It's like, you don't think it's going to come back and bite you? I don't think they do. Why did it, why did Bon Appetit get fucked?

This, you know why? Because when all this stuff was happening with George Floyd, they made a statement and people were like, oh, fuck you guys. You're not woke and you're not going to get brownie points for being woke and we're going to expose you now. Ironic brownie points. Yeah.

I mean, because of the food. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy. Yeah. I think it's just ego, man. Like, you just assume that you're like, well, they're bad. I'm good.

So, therefore, anything I do is good, you know? And I think to circle back about, like, what today are we going to think is not cool that we were doing? Yeah. I think it's very hard to say because right now, like almost what it seems like is there are no rules. There are no like facts. There are no principles. The right thing is whatever my team is doing. That's what it seems.

And that's a very dangerous place to exist in. Well, that's all it is. Yeah. I mean, from fucking community boards to like QAnon that's that's all it is yeah i mean from fucking community boards to like q anon like yeah teams it's just like because like we're talking about this last night like in a way i like we would understand trump people like america first blah blah blah and yeah we're not racist and this is like okay well there's people with nazi symbols next to you at rallies like yeah hey they're allowed to do that but like yes they're allowed to but you should be denouncing them from your you should also be concerned that a nazi likes

anything you like but they don't because they're on their team but it's the same thing with liberals like the way that we talk to people that like yeah if you're a liberal over the summer and you spoke out against writing yeah holy shit did people hate you but guess what breaking a target is bad and anyone who does it is bad yeah it's it's ridiculous but it's just like it's just like so people is like it's so weird we're all finding ways to justify i don't get it yeah of course well it's just a self-preservation thing too in the same way and then you also nobody wants to admit that they're dumb either that's why it's like why don't get it. Yeah, of course. Well, it's just a self-preservation thing, too, in the same way. And then you also, nobody wants to admit that they're dumb either. That's why it's like, why don't these QAnon people see it's made up?

It's like, because they'd have to face the fact that for four to five years, they believe something completely fake. It's like why people stay in Scientology or occult. It's like, well, if this is true, it means my whole life is a lie. So a woman said that. She was like, I don't know if I believe in God anymore. It's like, you're learning. You're smart. There you go.

God's not real. Nothing matters. And I think that's the note to go out. Yes, let's do it. All that said, God's not real and nothing matters. Thank you for listening, everybody. We'll talk to you next week. Follow us on social media.

This is where we play it cool. We're like a hot chick. It's like, whatever. Hey, do it. Don't do is where we play it cool. We're like a hot chick. It's like whatever. Hey, do it. Don't do it. Don't do it. Who even cares? All right.

Have a good weekend. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. We'll see you next time.