The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 188 - The Past Times with Andrea More

Episode Date: August 21, 2026

Dave Anthony reads a paper to co-host Gareth Reynolds and comedian Andrea MoreSOURCESTOUR DATESOFFICIAL MERCHMint Mobile HIMSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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You know what we do here. Each week we go through a newspaper from a random date and history picked out by none other than Dave Anthony. I, Gareth Reynolds, have never seen it. And neither has this week's guest. That's the great Andrea. More. Hello, Andrea.

Hi. Wow, this is a, what a, what's your preparation like for podcasts? I, um, had ice in my mouth and I thought you were going to kind of riff for longer and like be funny and stuff. Wow. No. But that didn't happen. And so then by the time, it was time for my introduction.

You choose the port ice. Yeah. Very interesting. Yeah. Um, well, how, uh, how, how is your computer? how are things um i uh don't have a brand new computer unlike some people apparently i have seven yeah you can take one a day oh no they're all for my keep them on top of each other you just need one for your hands and one for your feet it's to show people you need a math

computer like what i'm doing yeah it's not about using them it's about letting people know that i have Yeah, I always thought your views on regime change in order to get lithium for cheaper was a bit incongruous with the rest of the views. I think it's really important. I listen. Fuck you, Bolivia. Okay. Are you talking to Andrea?

I'm Andrea. I'm not, I'm actually not Bolivia. He has good days and bad, Andrew. He has good days and bad. I disagree. Andrea, you have a new special coming out. Don't.

Wait, is this how I think? found out? Is this how I find out? It's going to be great. Do not know that? We're very excited. Three days. What is it on? Is it on the new Info Wars? It's on your laptop. Watch it. Oh, good Lord.

Well, Andrew, this is your last time. Sorry. Last appearance on the show. You know what we're going to do. We're going to go through this stinky old newspaper with a stinky old man. And to start off, we're going to start off, we're going to. guess what year this stinky old paper is from. You get to go first. Take a shot. What is this paper from year? 1867. Good guess. 1901. It is 1937. No winner. Wow. I'd shocked by that, aren't you, Andrea? Yeah. How do you have a newspaper from the future? That's a very good question.

You really good question. You really need to get a new laptop. Because there's just a lot you've got to learn about. She's good. But answer her a question. What was the question? Exactly. Okay.

There's more of a comment that question. As good days is bad. The New Orleans item, Tuesday evening, April 6, 1937. Huh. And of course, Andrews from New Orleans. Yeah. No, So that's why we did that.

My mother was a pelican and my father was actually also a man. Wow, that's tough. That's man. I mean, they do have those big mouths. That's the thing. Of men? Yep. That's what I came out of.

Did you? Trump, yeah. I didn't know that that was a. It's a big thing. Hey, Andrew, what are your dogs wearing right now? Oh, how kind of you to ask. My dog bogey just had surgery to get cancer removed.

and so in solidarity. It's like a vanity surgery. It is wearing an e-collar. An e-collar? Yeah, it's like the plastic. Yeah. Did you put any any stickers?

Yes, of course. I used like a Christmas wrapping ribbon to tie it in a bow. And then Sonia is just, she's not wearing anything. She's nude. that's why shoes been put away for the podcast. Oh, yeah. And so, Dave, you bought your dogs. I bought them?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. A filthy, gross dog. Freedom shelter, whatever the fuck it is. Seven laptops, breeder dogs. This guy's a walking lie. I mean, we did adopt a dog, but it bit my son five times. So then we run another rat.

Well, what was he wearing? Was it a hat? Mostly just a dress. Well, there you go. What? I don't know if people cone in the kid. Go ahead, Dave. Have you ever put your child in a cone?

How many kids do you have? I have, well, three from the breeder. But we had another one, but it bit my son five times. I don't have any that I know of. Andrea, I really feel like. Confusing. It's really confusing. For sure.

Although some people don't. There's a lot of those stories where women are just on the toilet. That's true. And then all of a sudden they just go, whoa. I took a through. I took it thrice. But then it turns out to actually have been a turd. That's the weird thing.

I didn't know I was pregnant. Man, that's poo. Yeah, one time I thought I was pregnant, but it just turned out to be pee. Yeah. Wow, even worse. That is a sad. I named it Harry. That is a sad bird.

It was a girl. It was a girl? Oh, that's so cute. That's cool. That's nice. 2,738 hobos killed on trains in 1936. How many? 2,738.

A 9-11's worth of hobo death? Every single hobo killed. This was Al-Qaeda's early days. Thank you. 100%. That's a lot of hobos. That's a ton of hobos. Now, killed probably isn't the right.

Although... I think you might... Probably wrong, because this is when the train. security guys would just kill hobos that... And trains were probably crashing and... No, I'm thinking like I actually murdered. Yeah, I think there was probably a lot of hobo murders.

Yeah. A lot of hobo and hobo crime as well. Yeah, hobo and hobo. Well, why do you... Well, she, it upsets her. Why did you say that like you were recollecting it? Well, what you have to understand is I try to stay out of the sun and so that makes me look a lot younger than I...

actually am. Okay. Okay. I get you. I'm actually 32. Wow. Oh, wow. And very bad counting.

Wow. Holy cow. Wow. She's not right. Wow. I know. You guys didn't offer me anything to drink when I came on here. I just want to point that.

I mean, I would say the main reason for that is that we're in different locales. You know. But it's just, it would have been a nice gesture. Care for a drink? I'd love one. Thank you. What's it called iron? Iron brew.

Want some iron brew? I'll take a kombucha. Okay. All right. I'm going to have to go. I'm over there. I don't know how to get through the room. Go over to her house and do it.

All right. Enjoy it. Do good shows. Never doing that again. The Association of American Railroads reported today, 2,730 illegal train riders. and other trespassers on railroad property were killed in train accidents in 1936. Bad training.

This report said it was a high mark for any year since 1923. We did it. Except 1933. Wow. That it's not the highest. That's so many hobo deaths. Because they're like, if you've ever seen hobo movies, they're like strapping themselves in the bottom of belts.

Oh, they are? Yeah. They're there. from the security guys. They're doing all this crazy shit. Where are they going? Opportunity? No, they're just going.

Grand The end point. I think a lot of the deaths, unfortunately, happened because the stick that they're carrying that has like the pillowcase with all their stuff in it, a lot of these people, they don't look before they turn.

It's like drivers who don't check their... You're suggesting that the Abbott and Costello stiffing each other to death? Yeah, it's actually not... They're hitting each other with the stick, accidentally. By accident. Yes. So it's not quite like killing. It's more of like a manslaughter, like involuntary manslaughter things. It's like a lot of sticks. Okay. And that's why those things were invented on buses to put your luggage kind of on the side below before you load before you enter

the bus to prevent this from happening. Just to be clear and fair. This is historically accurate. That's why the bus luggage spots were made. You know that for to be. It could be. Yeah. It could be. Okay. That's an interesting. That answer makes it feel like it might, there's, you don't know, I guess. Yeah, like you're making it up. Potentially.

Okay. Yeah. All right. I truck. Yeah. I sure. I mean, that's all we have to go on. Yeah.

It's like a scientist, you know. Okay. Yeah. I mean, yeah, not. Just, yeah. But just. Yeah. Sponging in-laws plea wins probation.

Hell yeah. finally get them the excuse dalton roberts junior 32 gave for allegedly driving a stolen car from guthrie oklahoma to denver won him probation i just want to say something i did just look up hobo deaths and um there's one from not too long ago that says rip hobo shoestring YouTuber's body found in Tennessee Lake? I think that the term unhoused, we should maybe go back to hobo. Why? Why push for that?

I think because I've found that if you say something kind of like explosive like that, it really drives engagement. Yeah, I think it's the wrong thing, though. We're looking for engagement. Yeah, okay. Not necessarily empathy, but, engagement. Okay.

Also, unhoused is too clinical. I really don't like unhoused. And the main reason is because when I've talked to people, well, when I've talked to people who are experiencing homelessness, none of them have ever called themselves unhoused. It's actually people who are housed that say it. Yeah.

And it seems like they find that that battle is more important to fight than getting the houses. Seems like that's maybe their. Or the stewstrain. Oh, the shoes train. Thank you. Yep. Absolutely.

Okay. All right. Thank you. It's like when people don't like, when my slaves don't, they don't like to be called slaves. Are they like to be called dogs? Not not enslaved people. They're like, I would rather you call me slave. Right.

I'm going to let him out of the basement. Maybe. Maybe we'd take it from the top. Yeah. One more. All right. Ready? Hello.

Welcome to the past night. They're all Bosnia. Please stop. stop. Okay, I guess. Back to this. He said he was fleeing from his sponging in-laws. Four years, he said, I had to support the whole tribe. I tell you, Judge, it was driving me nuts. I like talking to a judge like that. What did he do? He stole a car and drove it from Oklahoma to Denver, like, but you can't, maybe. Maybe.

was the in-laws car? I think there's something missing. Okay. There's, this is a... There's a mystery. There's, this is an abbreviated story and not, not well. Right. We're mad. It's not even that far. I mean, what, that's not that long. Oklahoma. It's, it's a good hour and a half. I'm going to go 20, 20, 21 hours. I'm going to say. He should have stole their plane. We would have gone their bus. I drove from New Orleans to Denver once without stopping, without taking a real break. And I lost mind. You're like that astronaut who wore the diaper. Yeah, I was doing it all for that guy,

same guy. Yeah. That's awesome, by the way. That guy kicks ass. Were you, were you alone? Yeah. That's a 20 hour, 20. Got to be right around there. Why'd you do that? I was trying to get a flight from, I had finished my show, and I was trying to get to Denver, where I was leaving the van, and I was trying to fly back to see my mother for a day before she left. Oh, I've done that. So, all right, keep reading. What's the farthest you driven in that day, Andrea? Colorado to Illinois.

Yeah. Okay. That's not bad. Yeah. I mean, we should probably get, you know, we're just sort of. I joked us, really. It's impossible. He'll fight to win back childbride.

Oh, no. Let's talk about drag. If never Dave reads a headline, it sounds like he's trying on a new prescription every time. It's not quite the right one. Yeah, I agree. That's very true. Yeah. He's like...

A Bobo told me that. Well, again, we're back to square. Yeah, let's do it from the top. Okay. Welcome to the past times. I'm going to do it this time. Okay, great. This is a Soloft headline.

Yeah. He'll fight to win back Child Bride. Ugh. always the child bridesmaid. Never the child. Actually, you'd rather be the child's bridesmaid. Yeah, well, interestingly, the child's bridesmaids are all adults. It's a weird friend group.

If anyone here knows why these two should not be wed. I do that's a child. Oh, okay. Outside of the obvious. Any personality to problems? Gang. gangling? Gangling? Gangling? That her name? I don't know what that. The 27 year old man is gangling.

This is from Minnesota. Gangling 27 year old Ernest Johnson and ate away the cheap guitar with which he would 12 year old Virginia de Remmer. Oh my God. And allowed he was allowed in in quotes. He was ready to fight for the right to live with his child bride. Oh my God. Hold on. How old was he? Because he might have been like 40. 27. Okay.

Yeah. That's age appropriate. I don't think it is. This child's 12. I think that's wrong. I'm on record. She's an old 12, if you know what I mean. No.

Wrong. Let me get my guitar out and win her back. She's close to puberty. Gangling. Jesus. Imagine being a 25-year-old woman during that time who's single. I'd be like, if only I were 12. Or just like he went out.

with him a couple times. I found someone new. It's your daughter. She very new. She is 12. I will win her back. The two were separated by Blue Earth County authorities last night as Virginia cleared away the supper dishes in the two-room house in which they had lived with Virginia's mother

since their marriage a week ago. Oh, my God. But the authorities were like 16-year-olds. The whole thing is like that Bugsie Malam movie with all the kids. Just like, hey, like being there with the mother. Why is the, but this is how it always works. The parents are always like, yeah. That does happen where the parents like, we get it.

We get it. Young love. Today, Virginia sobbed in a cell in the Blue Earth County. Why is she arrested? Why is she in a cell? Or is that like how she's describing her life? Yeah. Oh, no, Virginia's the mom.

mom. Sorry. Oh. The daughter. Oh, no, they're both Virginia. We don't know which. Let's find out. If he's free, that's problematic.

He's free and the mom's in jail. Yeah. Oh, the mom, sorry, the mom should be in jail too. Yeah. They should let the mom and him out and the girl should go to jail. Right. Yeah. Because if she's in jail, then no one, she's protected from getting wed again.

Right. No one can get it. It's like when I put my dog in his crate so he can't hurt him. hit anyone else you know what I mean like so no one can hurt him right sir can't the dog goes in the crate why are people trying to hurt your dog you know what cut cut that part I was confusing I'm not going to cut that part okay let's keep it keep it in well either way we'll cut that part and that's an instruction is it could be today today Virginia sobbed in a cell in the blue earth county jail unable to understand the county's charge that she is a delinquent and neglected

child or wired grown up name of keeping I can't read that house had been interrupted by outsiders you have any idea how much you hurt that man it's disgusting what you did what the fuck is you're a child you should not be putting an adult situation like that now getting the slammer

would you rather go to jail or be separated from your 27 year old husband God damn it. That's a tough one. Or I think I know it's kind of a cliche one, but. I think, yeah, it is. Obviously, we've all answered that lot. It's a class for Virginia question, right?

Yeah, I mean, I'd rather be separated from my husband. Yeah, it's a real genius choice. Yeah, right? Very true. I'm sticking with the hubby. Good. Good for you. A divorce father, Johnson, Johnson,

divorced father of five small children by a former marriage. He was married to all those children. That's crazy. No. I've been through this one before. Was not at home when Sheriff Frank Cords arrived to take his bride away. What? Two newspaper men who greeted him with word of what happened, he confided to.

I guess it would just break, it would just about break my heart if they took Virginia away from me for good. but I'm going to fight for our right to be together. To party! And I ain't much worried. Hermann, Pa, say, they get it. They aren't going to have nothing to do with an annulment.

Oh, this is 1937. 1937? This is crazy. That's, fuck. That's... Were there other things going on?

Like, why did the news? Why is this the news? This is the most important story in America. I mean, it is. horrifying. Yeah, it is horrifying. So.

Mrs. De Remmer's. That's you, Andrea. You seem quite comfortable. I just like seeing people get together and kind of like... It's different. This is different. This is totally different. I don't know. It's a great depression. I feel like if you're with someone you could split rent, it makes it a little bit easier.

I think there's just... The 12 year old is paying half the rent. Oh, wait a minute. But now we're going to have another argument. It could be 60-40, you know. Child's paying 60%. You're getting a great deal. Mrs. DeRammer, standing in the background with arms, Akimbo, nodded in a sense.

Oh, you know the writer felt that newspaper made. When he wrote Akimbo, he was... Finally can use Akimbo. Hell yeah. It's all that county attorney's fault, she said. He always had it in for Ernie, but he and Virginia love each other, and I don't intend to let anything keep them apart. Absolutely crazy.

It's disgusting and crazy. He, you've got to see them together. It's horrifying. Ernie, doesn't make sense to me because, like, people's grandparents, they're so old. So how are these people so young?

I don't think she gets, I don't know, like years. Yeah. And stuff. Like, it seems like their type is actually old, person. Yet back then, they were dating 12-year-olds.

You do? Make it make sense. Okay. Yeah, I agree. Yeah, no, it's really, yeah. Yeah, it's just, it's cool. It's weird like that. She puts her dogs and she.

Yeah. Meanwhile, Ernie told moodily of his courtship of Virginia while he lived as a rumor in the Let me tell you about our meat cute. He's a boarder in their house. She was down the hall in the bathroom. I tell you what, when you know, you know. When you know, you know. The border fell in love with the landlord's child.

Yes, child. Well, I have a very strange thing that's happened to me upstairs. First of all, the room is perfect. No, no, step. Second of all, your child daughter, I do have caught feelings for her. We just sat home of evenings and I sang and talked to her a lot, he said. He picked up a battered guitar from behind a cot. Here is a song I sang to her a lot.

Oh, like a dowry. Yeah. To the twangy accompaniment of the guitar. He crooned in a high nasal voice. you're nobody's darling but mine I mean for it always to be like that he said that's my girl the itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout

and for some beautiful Preston put a picture of Ted Nugent in here I have no idea why that's that what the girl looked like yeah probably Nugent does look like a 12 year old girl Well this shit's like old gent The shit's still going on today. Yeah, no, we're, well, I mean, you know, there are some rumors that the president was, of everything, of our nightmares.

What? Oh, God. President Trump may have dabbled in murder and tried. Trump won the election. Oh, my God, Andrea. Which is, we have to, I know. Your laptop is so... Yeah, your laptop.

Who did you think was present? Don't blame me. I voted for Dukakis. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Loved him. He was great. He came out of that tank. Yeah.

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when network is busy, includes up to 20 gigabyte hotspot, capable device required, availability, speed and coverage varies. C-Mobile.com. And get your tongue on that phone. Do not. What's wrong with movies? There we go. Griffith says writers need

to get around with life. Everything's a reboot. A movie writer's... I've seen that train before. Good Lord. Same fucking truth. How many times can we make birth of a nation? Movie writers need more roughage, the emotional, not the edible variety in their lives,

says film director Edward Griffith. There's too much eating. I was his assistant for a long time. Everyone's eating. He tried to marry me. Everybody's just eating. It's actually older than I am now. I mean, I like eating.

What are you doing? It's just too much. What's going on over there? I just think there's so much. We've seen oysters. Enough. What are you talking about? Champagne.

Okay. So out there. A water bottle? Can you get a larger water bottle next time maybe? Andrea, this is how everyone's doing it in the future. What did you just do? Wanted to see if that was rust. That thing.

Rust where? In this? In? How do you wash that? You take it to the car wash and get the big... Look, I like to have fun as much as the next fella, but I'm not going to stand here and let you do that. No, no, you're sitting.

What do you say, Tubbs? Guys, I feel so bad that I was late, but I cannot over-emphasize that it was not my fault and that I'm innocent. Whose fault is it, Preston? No, I don't know. If you had to pick between you and Preston, whose fault is it? Mine, but that's because of the framing of the question. I don't think you know how anything works.

Yeah. Well, yeah, that's why I'm here. I don't, otherwise I'd be at a job. That's fair. That's fair. Fair point. That's a good point. As a cure for this deficiency, the noted director prescribed today a good old medieval

custom subsidized by a patron, permitting authors to roam the world, searching for nature in the raw. Put them on trains. Strap them to the bottom. Let them see some stuff. And absorbing bruising. Mind the stick. Yeah, mind the stick. Writers don't live,

Griffith argued, and no story of any substance was ever written by a person without some valid bruising contacts with life. Okay. I think now. fairly fair argument I agree with him completely I think most television now is unwatchable because all the writers

learned about life through television it's a bit of actually living with it's real bad I think most television is unwatchable because I can't find the remote we even bought one of those remote holders so that it wouldn't go missing I still weren't missing a remote holder yeah it's like a little wicker basket for your remote

oh the little right the picnic remotes You're talking about a basket. Yes, and there's ants all over it. Oh, God. This is covered in jam. It's the right. Well, not jam, but the residue. How many remotes do we have?

Seven. Wow. Well, it's for the treble. I don't know what the other six do. One's for treble. Here comes treble. Pretty good. I think I'm in treble.

Oh. Oh, here's one that, uh, and you like trick kills dog's master oh fuck trick like a prostitute no no probably magic that would be great though if that was a trick a trick killed a dog owner owner master the master of the i don't care for the term master what what's the trick we're going to find out that's that's what the article's going to be they buried the lead in the headline that's impressive mounted patrolman e-bondon Roy, 34, caught his stepson's big police dog to taught his stepson's big police dog to leap at the sight of a drawn revolver.

Oh, well, there you go. It's suicide by cop by a dog. Yeah. We need to be teaching more dogs this. This is amazing. There are no more dogs need to know this. Yeah, get out the spray bottle. He's secretly taught police dogs to attack a gun.

Oh, great. A lot of gun. Oh, my God, gun. No, I'm allowed to. have it. I'm allowed to have it. Yeah. Yeah. After taking the dog for a walk, Monroe was sitting, was in. Well, that was his first mistake. Yeah. You don't take a dog for a walk. Ever put it in it. Great. After taking the dog for a walk, Monroe Monroe in the, Brooklyn home, playfully pointed his revolver at the dog. Oh, so he's having a goof. He was

goof. He was goof. Hey. Well, that is very funny. You know, it ate you. But, Funny is funny. Funny's funny. My dog loves it when I pointed a shotgun at him. Yeah, that's very true. The dog... A little treat comes out. Yeah.

That's right. The dog leaps seizing Monroe's wrist in his teeth. You were pointing a gun on him. Allegedly. And you know the dog likes wrists. He should have stopped resisting. Stop wrist resisting. Stop wristing.

Can we get medical attention for Gareth? Absolutely. He's stuck. Resting. Rist resisting. Give a little respect. The gun was discharged and the bullet pierced Monroe through the left chest. The left chest is so funny.

Right here on his left chest. The right chest? It was a long time ago. You know, it's like evolution. Body's changed. In the 30s, we all had two chests. Yep. One from memories and one for our heart.

Mm-hmm. But in the UK, they had the right chest. Father. Yeah. As you a dinner chest. He died before an ambulance surgeon from Kings County Hospital arrived. His widow, Celia, and two stepchildren survive him. Let's be nice as the ambulance person, though, to show up and realize there's no work.

I think I'm fine with this story. Yeah, I'm fine with it, too. Yeah. The dog won. Yes. Don't pull a gun on a dog. Yes. right yes

and it's very quiet oh I'm nodding sorry I forgot that this is a audio format suspiciously quiet yep Barbara Barbara Brooks Barbara Brooks discusses the subject are women cruel

such an evergreen topic oh boy and what do we constitute as a woman 12? Nine. Women are very unpredictable. For instance, my wife just said, I'm a baby.

I'm not marrying a groan. Women are crazy. Women be crazy. They really do. Were they still doing lobotomies back then? Yes. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Wait, I know about Lobonies from this podcast. I just realized the Rosemary Kennedy episode. Wow. This is full circle. That sounded scripted, but it wasn't. Yeah. No, that was good. Yeah. And you know, you know my theory on it. They did it to RFK too. Oh, yeah. Oh, my theory on that. Yeah, it's like adult. They gave her lobotomy when she was 18 because dad was essaying her, as they say. that's my I guess oh I thought they

lobomized her because where the memories are stored and really pick at it that family is so fucked up sexually that some really crazy shit went down that's my theory but then counterpoint RFK that's true

and real good it's just it's just so sad that that guy has so much sex because it's such an indictment. Does he have a lot of sex? He does fucking have any more. What does he have sex with? Hot ladies.

Yeah. Poor roll. Snakes. Snakes. Okay, let's get, let's get down of this because this is really important. Cheryl's shirts. Are women cruel? Yes. I put the question to several men.

Yeah. That's what you. Hell yeah. That's how you do it. To their own. sex yes, answered one with a long line of... Let me answer the question in the craziest way. To other women, yes.

As a yes. Let me put myself in both shoes. To women, yes. To their own sex, yes, answered one with a long line of amatory experiences to his credit or discredit. To the man they loved, no. When a woman's... When a woman hands her heart into a man's keeping, she is loving, self-sacrificing.

She is maternal, but never cruel. She is 12. She's a child, after all. Women cruel barked a crusty bachelor. How will you describe me in the article? Well, since all that stuff is flaking off of you, I would say crusty. I'm single. But crusty had a different connotation back then.

a compliment. Yeah. Oh, like being gay. He's a crusty old bachelor. So crusty. He's a crusty old bachelor. Look at that.

Not any more cruel than cats and children. The three form of perfect Trinity. Well, women are children. There are also sometimes cats. So. Let me talk about the Trinity. Every guy answered the craziest way possible.

Absolute craziest way. So let me walk you. through, let me answer your question with a question. Have you ever heard of cats? Yes. Women? Yes. And a third. Children?

Yeah. Too many ideas to hold up one. Are you thinking of the Trinity? Yes. Were women not allowed to be interviewed back then? Well, you know, you ask him a question. It's a whole thing. Yeah, why would you bring that up?

You could, but it's a whole thing. I mean, that's what editors are for. Yeah, but even the editor, I mean, it's just a whole thing. It's just the whole. That's not open that can of worms. Yeah. Well, I talk to a woman when you can ask three men. Yes.

Or a cat. Or a cat. Or a child. Yeah. But there's some overlap there, obviously. Or just write an article based on nothing. Yeah. You don't even need to ask any of them.

Oh, so creative writing? Yeah. I don't like that word. Yeah. A Benedict of some years standing, first peering around to see if his wife was with an earshot, insisted that cruelty is born and bred in the bone of women. Well, look, mine are the other room, so allow me to tell you that this is a marrow problem. Even the best of them bring out sharp.

feline claws from soft, padded natures. They're all bitches. They have talons. Women have talents. Yeah. Well, they're actually a gel X extension with French tips, but spade is a spade. I got a French tip. Don't marry a woman.

Hell yeah. I love just watching guys be guys. It's the locker room. how we do it. Start with the beginning of things, he said. Look at the way Eve treated a mate who'd actually given up one of his ribs for her, sweet sake. They were doing that trick back then? Yeah.

The idea of like, evidence? Garden of Eden. That's where my evidence comes from. Case clue. You give up a rib. She takes the rack. not content with getting herself into mischief. She dragged Adam over to the forbidden tree.

Oh, the way she made him eat that apple. Yeah, yeah. Sweet revenge for that lilith contrapons. I call it. And she pronounced contrapal. Thank you. Not anymore. And she passed the heritage of cruelty straight through the ages.

every daughter of Eve possessing it in greater or lesser degree. It is really, I mean, amazing how we just had to put it in the Bible, like, women create. Now, look, men are going to do a lot of weird stuff, but it's the woman's fault from the very beginning. Chapter one, the ladies are shit. Chapter one, can you blame us? Uh-oh. You're not allowed to move locations.

Okay, sorry. What are you doing? to where you go. My dog just had surgery and I think he wants to go outside to pee. What is your plan? My plan? Well, I thought if I left the computer, that would be worse. So I was like maybe.

That is worse. Okay. Do you need to take the dog outside? You can walk outside with the computer and let the dog be. That's what I was going to do. And then you guys called me a wicked. No. No.

You'll lose the connection? No. Okay. It's just interesting. It's, I'm like, not enough people do that. Yeah. Go, go, go wander. I like, yeah, no, wander around.

No, it's fine because he's calmed down now. I think he just needed to hear your voices. Take the dog outside, Andrea. I'm not going to sit, no. Okay. Oh, she chose to leave frame. We said that was the weirder one. Yeah, we said don't be.

We said to. That was the one we said to not to. We said to bring the computer so we could get the visual. All right. That dog is shitting everywhere. Okay, I'm back and I ended up just putting him down. because I didn't want like a back, like it to happen again or further to me. No.

No. How did you do that? We did not say to do that. I don't know. Well, I have another one. There's another one. It's fine. Now it says the connection is unstable.

Yeah. You guys are so not having me back. Well, I don't think we've even had you here. Where have? Oh, this is one perfect for you. Okay. Find Screaming Woman in trailer just drunk. For me?

Yeah. Oh, well, yeah. The title might well be the scream from a trailer, but the ending, frankly, is a letdown from the average modern mystery story. I think too much. Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say, I don't love that tactic. No.

The drunk scream, I don't care for that one. Why was she screaming? She's drunk. She's drunk. Women's screaming. They get drunk. I guess so. We're learning a lot about women.

Yeah, no, this is. And trailers. Yep, the two big ones. There's a woman screaming. The bipecta. Yeah. Oh, look at, you. There's a woman screaming in a silver-colored trailer going out

Ponce Dillon Avenue. Investigate, police broadcaster H.W. Stevens flashed to cruising squad cars. Ten minutes later, patrolman W.F. Sutherland and J.R. Palmer reported on the call. Trailer, stop, they said. Everything aboard, okay, just a drunk woman locked in by her husband. He's taking her to the country for air. No arrest. Oh, my God.

Your type of error. Complete murder. It's a kidnapping. Do not move that trailer. Jesus what? What's she doing in the back? Oh, her? She's just going to the country to get some air.

Well, have a good night. Wink, wink, wink. My wife could use a bit of that country air, too. Do we have the names of these people? Yeah, Jeffrey Dahmer. Okay. No, there's no names. Names are the cops, but that's it.

They don't bring up the guy who was clearly going to murder his wife. I've been thinking about doing a trip this August to properly explore Quebec City. Talking about wandering the cobblestone streets of the old city, grabbing a fresh-baked croissant before anyone else is awake, then wandering over to Marchet du Vueport. where locals grab maple butter and fresh cheese right by the train station. That's my kind of trip. While planning a trip like this, I've been thinking about my own place,

sitting empty while I'm off exploring another city. So now when I travel, I look into listing my space on Airbnb. Somebody else gets to experience everything that makes my city special for a few days, walking to neighborhood favorites for breakfast, catching a movie at the historic theater, spending golden hour at the nearby observatory and discovering the kind of local spots you'd never find if you were just passing through.

This is the kind of thing that just makes sense once you think about it. It doesn't matter if you're gone four days or two weeks. Your home can be put to work while you're off exploring somewhere else and you'll put some extra cash in your pocket. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.c.ca.

slash host. Okay, doke. That's a fun story. Well, that's good. Solomon and Tachman. I mean, we did just hear about a murder. Okay. Yeah. Solomon and Taxi had nine wives. Finally, a normal story. Where'd they go? To the country for some air. This is from Atlantic City. John McLevy, McCelvey, sorry, John McKelvey of Washington, D.C., was pictured as a Solomon in taxi cab driver's uniform today? That's got to be illegal.

I don't understand. Do you understand? Solomon and the tax, no. You guys don't get this? Come on. No. Explain it. Okay, so what happened was he dressed up as a police officer.

Is that what they're saying? I think so. Say it again? Was pictured as a Solomon in taxi cab driver's uniform today. Oh, Taxi cab. He was dressed up as a cab driver. So he's not a cab driver. No. He's just pictured

us one. So it's like one of those guys who act like they're a cop or whatever. Ice. But this guy's doing it with a tax driver to get like taxi cred. Yeah. There's a guy in Rikers, I think it is, who was imprisoned

for imitating an MTA officer. But he got everyone to their locations on time. and he knew all the routes. And he was really good at his job. And the judge put him away forever. Not forever. For like 30 years.

Yeah, there's a documentary about it. Years? Yeah, it was like a crazy sentence. He didn't do anything at the end of the day. He didn't do anything. He's like this autistic guy and he, in the documentary, he's like, I feel like I have purpose when I'm dressed up as an MTA officer. And he's like obsessed with trains.

And, yeah, he like took over trains and got people to where they were going. This is like when I got sentenced for being a plastic surgeon. Yeah. But I think the problem was... You were dressed up as an MTA officer. It was confusing. You didn't call them you. You were dressed up like an MTA officer.

You didn't know how to perform the surgeries. Well, that would matter because I said I was. Right. Which is the most important part of the job. This guy knew when to stop. What type of surgeries were you doing? Buttocks. He did mainly buttocks.

Okay. So you'd like put butts on like people's... faces. He would put back where everyone. I moved buttocks around. Yeah. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. But you got away with it too. When some men make love, they want to do it from behind. Let's go back to the paper. Let's go back to the paper. Hurry up.

On the back. Let's go back to the paper. Let's go back to the paper. Oh, I understand. I'm also a fake plastic surgeon. You don't have to explain it to me. Oh, okay. Oh, so women now can't be fake plastic surgeons.

They should be. I think it's great that they're doing that. It's equal right. Yeah. The sisters are doing it on their own. Yeah, you guys can put buttocks between shoulder blades. You know, that's right. Nobody say you can't.

Sure. Or a dog's head right there. Well, now we've lost. Making love from behind and having a dog. That's a sensitive subject. What's better, do you say? Yeah. Okay.

Or a cat's head? No. Made Mary. Cats actually have nine. heads. Yes. Yeah. Just in a different Not the way I do it. What? I don't think I love the way I do it.

Okay. Again? The way that I'm not doing it. Miss May Gates testifying in a divorce action directed against McKelvie by Miss Anna McKelby, a waitress, declared he has nine wives as far as I know.

He married waitresses and he stayed away from home so often. so they couldn't keep track of him. This accumulation of wives is such a strange compulsion. You need one for every laptop, I've always said. I mean, you have always said that, but not wives. What's, okay, so. Nice.

What's the right max number for you? I honestly just be single. Four? Four is too much. More. No. Five? Well, I guess if you got to do it, three.

Okay. Three. But again, not good. Henry, which wife would you like to be? The third. No, it's middle. Sorry. No, not me.

You're wrong. Sorry. Why would it be middle? Yeah, why would it be middle? That's the one they forget about. Yeah. Oh, right. Midwife.

Yeah. Yeah. The old one, the first one, as we call the old. Old one, yeah. She's, let me watch Odie on sister wives. What happens is. The first one is definitely not going to be into it by the end. Yeah.

The new one is really getting it. Yeah, get me. And he's like, yeah, cool. But then 10 years later, he's like, the way that he comes back like it's good news. Yeah. Hey, I met someone. We're bringing her over. and then all these like women his age are like, God damn it.

She's 19 with huge cans. She also has big boobs too. And she's got big tits too. And she's got a set of buttocks between her shoulders. Yeah, and a cat's head. She's got a cat set. She's a cat with huge tits and her back ass. She's got a shoulder hole.

And I think she'd be a great addition to the five wide. 561 kids. Miss Gates said she had once been the cab driver's mother-in-law, her daughter, Elizabeth, now dead, divorced him, she added. In that order? Weird. So, I hope so. Will you marry me? I love you.

The advisory master. A spoon. The advisory master in Chancery Court. Yeah. The guy who invented spooning. Why are women always cold? The guy who invented... It's kind of like you're a spoon.

What? They hadn't invented spoons yet, so it didn't really land. Much of the 50s. We're like matching dishes. It was a race with the Russians to see who could invent the spoon. They have a great show. We actually recruited some Nazi scientists. They were thinking that the fork with the spaces filled in.

You dirty fuckers. Miss Gates said she had once been the cab driver's mother-in-law. Her daughter Elizabeth now dead divorced him. She added the advisory master in Chancery Court recommended an interlocutory degree for Ms. McElvey. It's like a bunch of meats and pickles. I don't know what that means. I don't know what that was. Canceric court.

Interlocutory. Interlocutory. I've been into the cutery. and I liked it. What? It was on her back, in between her shoulders, and I went into the cutary. Inter, oh, here's how you pronounce it. Interlocutory.

Oh, totally different. You nailed it. Interlocutory. Interlocutory is a legal term meaning temporary, interim, and not final. Interlocutory. Interlocutory. Interlocutory. Delacatory.

That's a lady saying. Hell, yeah. Wife preserver. Yes, finally. This is an ad. Why not decoupage her? Some lipstick stains may be removed from clothing with one part glitter into one part glacial acidic acid

and three parts wood alcohol. The so-called indelible lipstick is almost impossible to remove, but worth trying. my God. Are we, is this really about cheating? Yes. There was really a whole thing about lips. When did they invent taking your shirt off?

The women were always, no women back then women like, you're not sucking my shirt, are you, Debbie? I'm num, yum, yum, yum. They made shirts out of different material back then. Yes. I mean, it seems a lot easier to get away with it now, I guess. I would just, don't tell my wife.

don't you just come home without a shirt and go out. What's what happened? I was robbed. I got robbed. Children seesaw to death on Big Beam. This is the stuff. Hell yeah.

The stuff. Children seesaw to death. That's the one. On Big Beam? That's right. The seesaw. It's like a jigsaw. That's kind of a perfect headline.

Oh. It has the what It has the seesaw Number three on your list Is where I'm sort of struggling But What was number three? No, it's a problem

The seesaw, okay Lawrence Yara Five and his cousin Georgia six discovered a 400 pound beam laying across a tree stump today Why doesn't matter

How much it weighs Shouldn't it be how big it is? Might come in Might be valuable information A 400 pound beam could be like five feet if it's thick as shit. I'm not going to. I need you to. I'm not going to get this with me.

Why do we need to know their names? I completely agree. Or their ages. Who gives a shit? The ages are important. 61 and 78. I want to know their weight. Wait would be good.

Yeah. Now we're talking. Yeah. What's your body count? Yeah. for that beam. They climbed on and started to seesaw. The beam slipped and crushed Lawrence to death.

Oh, my God. Okay, so does that mean you lose? Yes. Yeah. Like, yeah, they don't even talk about how one of these kids want. True. Right? Fair.

Yeah. Well, corporate media. Thank you. All right. Last one. Okay. Theander is fired. Oh, Dave.

Make it good. Hey, Dave. Hey, Dave. Make it a good one. 4,204 traffic arrests were made in March. That's a lot of, that's more than the hobos that died that year. It depends where it is. If it's in the country, no.

But if it's in like New York, yeah. Right? I mean, I, it's a, I don't know. Which New York? Good question. The old York. thinking of. Good question. Traffic supervisor Thomas DePauli announced Saturday that during the month of March,

4,204 traffic violations were recorded in the city. These include 160 persons who had charges of parking overtime. Wait, they got arrested for parking instead of a parking ticket, you got arrested? Yeah. I like that. I do too. That rocks. I mean, imagine the stress of when you're like having a bite to eat.

you're like, oh shit. I'm going to go to the mountains for a month. I got to get the fuck out of here. What did you do? Look, the meter's blinking. I'm not sure. He's a driver of a Honda Civic. We got to move.

167 who parked in an open zone. I guess. I don't even know what that is. I don't know. If you know, you know. Well, do you know? Do you know? No.

But you can do that with everything. Yes. Okay. 86 improperly parked. We're parked upside down. That's like parking. I left it at my house. How does this work?

I parked it in Denver from Oklahoma. I don't have a car. 424 who failed to stop at through street, street rights of way. Okay. 52 who drove the wrong way on. way streets. What is this guy doing? I like that that's in there with just like... Someone parked in an open zone.

People intoxicated, driving with a sword they were yielding. But driving down a one-way street the wrong way, isn't a park? How is that bad parking? It's not. It's totally different. They're just people who got arrested for traffic. Well, eventually you stop. Yeah. Not the way I do it. 711 speeding less than 35 miles an hour in school zones. 1,211 speeding less than 20 miles an hour in school zones.

Wait, they were going less than 20 miles an hour in a school zone and they got arrested. Go faster. Come on. Take them out. Why are you rubbernecking with these, by these children? Ooh. Hello. I think there's a future wives.

Anyone want to see a wedding just for a baby? I'm marrying children and cats. Do you like the bouncing ball? There we are. I have a car. Anybody want to get in the call? Hello? Wow.

Well, we're not done. 66 who blew horns unnecessarily? I can throw those people in jail. 239 who had no driver's life. licenses? I ate it. I was so hungry. I mean, there's really, who gives a shit?

291 who had no break test for their cars? Okay. Can't really stop for the ticket. Yeah, sorry. Got to keep going. 336 who disregarded traffic signals. And 33 who drove recklessly. That didn't fall under any of those previous categories.

Crazy. Down the one-way street. But thankfully, you were safe. Otherwise, we could be. I really throw the book at you. Well, that was weird. That was weird. Andrea thoughts, computer thoughts.

Computer thoughts. I have to figure out how to update my Chrome. Yes. And I'm just so grateful for you guys and to be here. And those are my thoughts. Stop up. Yeah, it seems like a lie. Stop it.

I'm getting emotional. But it's not the emotion you would think. What is the one you're, what is the one you're, what is the one you're feeling? Confused. Well, Andrea, thank you for being here. Tell people where they can follow you in real life.

What's your address? I live in Los Angeles, and my social media handle is A more underscore or less. My mom listened to the last episode, and she said, I need to hold up a placard in the future with my information. Where is it? I did that.

Okay. I forgot. Next time. She was too busy trying to use her hand crank computer. Yeah. Well, Dave's coming at you. I'd have to roll down the window on this thing. Well, thank you, Andrea.

We celebrate you. We love you. And time to let's start a go funny for a new computer. Yeah, I'd love a new computer. How about it? We'll get one someday. Thank you. Sorry, Andrew.

Thank you. And let's talk about when you can see my movie or come and see me do stand up in the next couple months. is exciting. So go to gareth ronalds.com for ticket links and all that to all this stuff. Just scroll down if you want to see my film, Give It Up, and just stay on the tour dates part if you want to see my stand-up. Let's start with Give It Up the film. If you want to see it, you can see it August 10th and San Diego, Santa Fe, New Mexico, August 12th, Denver, August 13th, Chicago, August 20th, New York City, August 23rd, Philly the 24th, Raleigh, August 25th, August 26th, Atlanta, and then, Nashville, August 27th. And then if you'd like to see me do

stand-up August 13th, 14th, 15th, I'll be in Fort Collins, Colorado at the Comedy Fort. And then in September, you can go see me at the Syracuse Funny Bone on September 17th, Vermont Comedy Club, September 18th, Albany on September 20th, East Providence, Rhode Island, September 22nd, Stanford, Connecticut, September 24th, New York, New York, September 25th, Springfield, Massachusetts, September 26th, Boston, September 27th. And then more dates coming soon. So go to garethreth Reynolds.com for tickets and information to all this stuff. Come check my movie out, give it up, and come see me on the road, garthrennolds.com. Love you dollheads.