The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 209 - John Macarthur (Live in Australia)

Episode Date: October 2, 2016

Live from Adelaide, Australia, comedians Dave Anthony, Gareth Reynolds, and Justin Hamilton examine the life of John Macarthur  SOURCES TOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH

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heard so far thank you for the one one man chanting Gareth which I guess is just saying it if you think about it so as far as I'm concerned you guys are the only good people in Adelaide yeah it is nice to be here with the best citizens of Adelaide everybody outside this building go fuck themselves not a lot of dads out there tonight not our dads are their dads here terrible fathers that's all right fuck are you doing it's gonna be if you heard it's gonna be nothing like last night where people left weeping and people walked up to me and said I don't know what to do now listen a lot of penguins died why is

your body language that of someone firing someone you're like about to fire the audience it feels like oh boy this is David this is weird but James Faustike is here and you're fired it's tough wow we'll have James is here James is the guy who does all of our fucking posters and just the best art and our book there's a dollop book coming and he is doing our book with us which will be out next year a lot of stories we've done on the dollop will now be brought to life by James and they're amazing yeah they're really the books his art is just fucking crazy yeah I mean I just imagine what would

happen if the guy smoked pot imagine nuts this one's tight a couple things I want to thank Craig from Adelaide comedy for helping us out I guess been awesome you guys if you're here for comedy you should all follow Adelaide comedy on Facebook and see the comics that are coming to town sometimes it's me and what what I don't know who that is a number of times what thank you sir for not helping we shout out to the balcony by the way just want to say what's up to the balcony people did not come people in the Lincoln seats it's up y'all guys we might go over to Kangaroo Island where there are no kangaroos

right so did you say whales are there's koalas over there are there so it's like oh that sir if you listen to the one from last night you'll understand you got to let him be too many and they're filled with magic that's how it starts and we've got a magic machine for him you can you can we learned last night you can turn any animal into oil guys you don't understand what the fuck is coming up it is I'm not sure what warning to put on it when I put it out but it has to be some sort of advisory it is and certainly no penguins should listen to it I've said that about most dollops but this one in particular from yesterday

is there any other announcements oh yeah we're doing a for people who aren't aren't in the audience we're doing a US tour and tickets gonna go on sale and it will be San Francisco Seattle and Portland and then also tickled the documentary just I was released in Australia recently and we're in it briefly but even if we weren't you should see it it is fucking bananas legally it is legally bananas which would be a good title too tickled is more apropos but legally bananas you guys are still out there right there's a blue there's a purple guy David don't play Pokemon during the fucking oh my

bag is full David I'm gonna take care of that later at the hotel for those of us who don't know that that's a thing on Pokemon that it's not you didn't just make a joke that we follow you're just like my balls are big anyway it's true though balls are big let's bring out our guests we had them last time we came through Australia and one of our favorite guests easily I'm doing an introduction sir I'm in the middle of my introduction Justin Hamilton everybody he drinks wine he's got the Jesus combo right there before and after picture pre-Jesus post-Jesus yep I don't mean to show

off but I like to get drunk and stay hydrated you should my man you know it's good for the skin yeah and that's something you should know when coming to Adelaide we're very particular about our skin that's more from a serial killer point of view you know you can do I I just realized I have to go I gotta I double book the night my dad's here there's no he's gone he he left a message he left years ago let's be honest are you okay is it bad to bring it up on Father's Day okay at least my dad called out before I'll I'll be fine I'm par ammo I'm parmo in case anybody wants some Japanese pizza they serve it

across the street so Jesus Christ I mean who's ready for that I walked over there I'm like what the fuck is happening right now look what's weird you're in Australia eating an Italian dish made by Japanese people yeah to pizza like I was gonna order but I was like you've never had a pizza knees before it's fantastic you eat it and you feel a bit hungry later but it's alright 1767 big fans oh we didn't do the intro that's what it is mother fucker let's just go let's yeah let's just plow through let's all wrap it up yeah so you're listening to the dollar oh yeah okay this is a bi-weekly American history

podcast each week I read a story from American history to my friend Gareth Reynolds and Justin Hamo Hamilton it's actually Gareth who has no idea what the topic is gonna be about we just got through it this dude shouting Gareth is awesome I can hear him he's just he's gonna do that just that's a stand-up callback gaw is that what just happened mm-hmm mm-hmm it was a cry John MacArthur was born near Plymouth England his father was a linen draper and a quote seller of slops oh yeah well we've all done that haven't we yeah those two normally go together yeah sorry I got slop all over your curtains I actually

things are tied over here I yeah we have some linen yeah all right linen on a prayer all right let's move on sloppy right lie slops were cheap ready-made or rough work clothing oh so he sold well that's disappointing you think he was selling slop like you know that shit that Roy Schneider if I can throw his into the ocean to get jaws like that I thought he was selling slop and linen so he sells that well someone has to who's buying it no you make me try to catch big fucking mechanical shots that kind of that's kind of slop is fucking homemade no one's selling that reckon well

sometimes you're busy like you got to take the kids to school and you got to take your wife to work because the cars fucked you gotta get the boat ready you don't have time to make the slot someone's gonna make the slot isn't it chum yeah that's chum first time I've ever been right literally usually he was making like butcher aprons or clothing sold to sailors like that was like a slop but in this case MacArthur's father sold underwear right so obviously that's a to like someone has to make underwear but the fact that that's brought up now in it I'm a little I it's different when it's brought up on this

podcast right so he is scarred so whenever he hears I fell in acid he thinks whenever he hears a fact on this show now he thinks that okay this is what it's gonna be about and it's gonna be fucked it's just why wouldn't you say fuck do you sound Australian this is true yeah I should have fact that's good thank you for people John was not proud of the way his father made a living what he really wanted was to be a top-notch gentlemen someone on top of the heap instead of in the middle yeah or at the bottom yeah because of this John decided he was sort of on the bottom yeah he did have an

underwear business this is from your new shirt carry on carrot isn't it I wasn't expecting that look so John decided he would not be a part of the family business selling underwear but he could truly never escape his past and wherever he went he would be called a staymaker's apprentice or bodice jack oh yeah or a what bodice jack sure bodice jack bodice jack bodice but but but buzz jack no boss boss bodice bodice jack bogus as in bodice jack a bug like boom he had titties he had big bodice titties what did he have what they call those are they called ladies brazil is what they called brazil's chest garments hands on I said what it is it's

right there ice you said bodice jack yeah yeah I've never heard that before neither have I well it's not the 17 fucking hundreds well translated and put it into Google translator is it on brajack like brajack brajack yeah what that's when you masturbate in bras right or as we call it he at Thursday night and father's day and mother's day all the days it's a problem but not Melbourne Cup MacArthur was a good-looking man with the exception of all these smallpox scars ah what are the odds yeah back then that was just like everybody had them yeah if you yeah you just yeah look at that smooth face fuck over there with his

non-pox face I gotta trust him at least they don't have bigpox yeah those are the worst oh yeah like many looking to rise up in English society John joined the military he joined it at the age of 15 well normal a little old to be getting into it honestly really think about what happened when he was nine oh he was working in a mine yeah hmm Colniner after a few years in the military a few years he married Elizabeth Avile in 1788 she was the daughter she was a lamb shoes or a cow wherever it goes or a cow lamb cow lamb it was a cow I mean

usually Ville is a cow well I'm talking about the lamb kind I would say that's fair but it's completely wrong don't Google it she was the daughter of a provincial farmer and had a bit of money she married John even though he was poor which bit of the money did she have just a little bit just a little bit tiny little the bottom part right okay just the tip there we go thank you very much that guy's getting bigger you know tip here we don't tip yeah gotta go he said it with irony yeah yeah I was working on a show once and we're talking about something like that and the showrunner was talking about just the tip but instead he said you know the when you put the

purple part in it's an adult it's an adult man like a grown man yeah purple part yeah that's because he fucks a lot of muppets man I'm an arm man I'm an arm so she married him even though he was poor at national social standing and she she said he was quote mile she was mildly repelled by John's high opinion of himself wow mildly repelled by your husband that's what you say when you don't want to say it smallpox cars yeah no it's your attitude yeah turn the

lights off but she married him anyway and then she had their first son five months after they were married so she didn't want to waste time so she she had sex on the night of the wedding and then with I've got things to do in nine months yep so double double baked it yep don't make that baby yeah not they did not do just the tip now John they did the whole bill since he joined he joined the military to climb the social ladder he was super unfortunately not into fighting and shooting in the battling part of the military hmm so his he just decided not to fight when his unit regiment was sent in 1788 is that a

full option it's not supposed to be but this is what he did now just stay yeah you guys go have a great time I send me postcards whatever we have in this era but I'll just chill here in Australia you serve in the army but if your team makes the IFO grand final you don't have to go you just stay back that's that's a fact that's an Australian fact Australian facts are gonna be a lot of them tonight so in 1788 he was AWOL from his regiment which had been sent to Gibraltar to top it off he would write letters demanding full pay while sitting at home real George W. Bush yeah and then he finally decided to accept a posting the

right one came along it's like all right I'll do this fine yeah fine I'll go to Hawaii yeah fine I'll watch Hawaii yes he was offered to join the upstart New South Wales course core right it's core core corpse corpse corpse with that it actually says corpse here so that's what threw me right but that's a misspelling because he did not join the New South Wales corpse right I'll watch over him you guys go yeah pretty stiff pay from what I hear yeah yeah now the South Wales was not opposed that many wanted when there were the places like India which were much more attractive to the soldiers in India

there was polo and drinking and wild animal hunting and fucking over wealthy Indians by looting all their shit and all the good fun that comes with that you should write pamphlets yeah I'm in all those places come to India New South Wales had none of that just a bunch of prisoners walking around New South Wales was such a shit military assignment that the military commander there a major gross had to recruit soldiers who had deserted and were now in prison that's how he got the job he was like why don't you fucking send the AWOL asshole there that's how he got that's how he got picked wait so now he's what wait so

now he's watching over no no he's not watching over anybody but that's we're just we're describing that no one wants to go to New South Wales okay well geez all right he did they just thought you were listening I was confirming a fact that I want to be on the same page this is awkward to be honest I had it when mom and dad fought and so the New South Wales Corps was attracted to the lowest of the low military officers those who weren't good at the job and those who were very corrupt which pretty much describes John MacArthur perfectly MacArthur is 23 his infant son and his wife Elizabeth climbed on to

the ship Neptune for the journey to New South Wales there were 421 male and 78 female convicts on the ship John immediately said about irritating his superior officers by complaining about his cabin he wasn't too keen on the location of the cabin because quote stench of the buckets belonging to the convict women of a morning I don't know they spoke weird convict women of a morning right that was that it must it must mean they were shitting in the morning yeah just the women buckets what they were near the women women area okay no I think you know I think men when they should yeah I would

imagine the men buckets you'd be like oh I think if you look at if you look at the difference between like and I go into a lot of female bathrooms but if you look at the difference yeah like the anytime I've peaked into a female bathroom which is again daily yeah it's pristine you go into a male bathroom it's a nightmare you haven't been to some of the women's toilets in Adelaide no no I mean the Adelaide ladies room yeah I went I went to full I went to four women's bathrooms here no tell it to the told the balcony I don't know what you guys are talking about you know that guy I do not you know I'm not familiar you

know it sounds like a Madonna song I think if you gave it a go it would probably sound really sweet oh my god how aggressive was that woman sing the song yeah I'll flick change at you we'll see I don't know maybe maybe maybe if I buy him a Japanese pizza yeah it's a pizza so the women are shitting in buckets and it smells thank you for the update and he could hear the terrible language of the convict women which just seemed to grow worse and worse the captain captain Gilbert the captain John Gilbert denied John's request switch cabins and threatened to write the war office and have MacArthur and his wife tossed off

the ship so John challenged the captain to a duel right well that's what you do yeah right if someone is bullets going on the ship for sure yeah always have I mentioned this was all before the ship even left doc what oh really how long what they're just hanging out you know that you get on the ship and you get ready to leave it was literally in that time frame of when they're boarding I think they get on the ship a little bit before it leaves like this is when like a half hour they're like yeah like days I think you would back days yeah back then you would get on the ship days before I would leave like cuz you didn't

why if you want to understand it emotionally it's like you know when you go to a movie that's on at 3 30 and it starts on Thursday you know I mean with all the trailers and all the oh yeah that's what it used to be like back then that's right you don't like you get on the boat and two days later would take off right it's like trailers can you just show up like last minute and be like oh I'm so sorry you know and then just get on then the boat might leave without you right well I don't want to even get on the boat all the women are shitting in buckets yeah that's why I want to be on the boat David that's why

I paid extra I'll take his cabin can I get as close to the ladies ship buckets as possible is there anyone to stay in the ladies ship buckets is that possible can I can I pretend I'm a shop hey can I pretend I'm one of the buckets can I be a bucket can we be buckets also the name of your new old biography I hear audio book of can we be buckets sorry may we be buckets so right this is all before it left it left Doc so without telling Elizabeth John went down to the dock did the ten paces thing and then they shot and missed each other great that most duels we've learned yeah kind of are like that but then

then that then so awkward but then it's over because you've both done the honorable thing and you've shot each other and then and then like your your disagreement is supposed to be over so couldn't you when you do the back-to-back couldn't you just sort of just be like hey what do you say we just actually don't shoot you let's just miss what do you think I'm sure it happened all the time okay we'll take that pace in a second guys we're just getting our back getting back to back right now and that will take the basis just before we do this look we say how many how long is your step because I don't want to turn around and miss

I'm a fast stepper I'm a fast stepper but I'll shoot I'll shoot to miss yeah okay I'll shoot to miss you shoot to miss okay obviously we have explosive tempers but I don't know what are you guys talking about yeah I'll flip you we're about to do all yeah but yeah but we're about to fucking do all right so dual or we're gonna just stop busting our balls you know what I'll fucking duel you if you got dual issues pal I'm gonna duel you yeah I'm the judge or whatever I'm gonna be in the middle of a two this is a threesome this also fit this also feels like it's about to turn into a nabba film clip yeah this is legally bananas so

with dueling the tensions are all supposed to be over and the men's honor restored John's issues with the officers however we're just getting started oh boy John's wife Elizabeth Elizabeth said Captain Gilbert was a quote black character the quarreling continued not just with John and Gilbert but with others Gilbert was a Navy guy and he was fighting with the military guys and they were all fighting with each other finally finally higher authority stepped in and a captain Donald trail took over the ship but apparently that wasn't enough as John continued to complain and irritate the

new captain so so it's not yeah has the bite taken off I think it's just about to leave right because that would be extra this is why I'm saying do it last minute you'll be fine yeah especially with this guy so so now there are quite another even there's quite a few sick convicts on the ship and they're packed in like sardines shackled readily let out for fresh air the men anyway though the women they would wear a lot more freedom because the crew needed to fuck them you don't use the shit bucket right it's hard for me to imagine girls using the shit bucket all right could you lie and say that you don't I do fuck

me where you from actually sounds pretty accurate so on the journey the convicts start dying with regularity as they would all become ill due to the conditions regularity is the silent killer I've always said that yeah people don't like to talk about it I just came back from the doctor you're on I have regularity oh my god I don't know how long it's gonna be hey that just means you're you're you're yeah regular bowel movements you're fine I know yeah but he said it looks pretty bad I'm really he said I'm normal right you okay no I'm regular I haven't suffered from severe regularity I just want to commend you on

your bravery it's a great journey with all of us it is a brave journey that's because the regular need a voice yeah I will be that voice you know you can do things about it like you can eat more cheese he gave me a prescription for cheese balcony like that one so right so they're becoming ill water was scarce so no one was watching good good there's no washing at all there was an outbreak of scurvy and then a quote violent epidem epidemical fever broke out and because rations were so few the other convicts would not say when another had died because then they could get his

extra rations oh my god comedy festival wait so you would weekend at Bernie's a guy who was there to be like and Jeff wants more potatoes yeah when he's done with his nap he was like I'm asleep so hungry for potatoes he was gonna sleep all day yeah so basically and then and then they would eventually be like oh that guy smells he smells too much I'm not gonna lie to you just been dead for a month and I've been eating his potatoes sorry worth it so 46 convicts died before the ship arrived in Cape Town for supplies now John was not keen on any of any of this and his complaining continued he was not happy with the

amount of rations the soldiers were receiving but the captain just didn't care captain trail also began to believe that John was using the passageway from the deck to his cabin to eavesdrop on the captain's discussions what could what could they possibly be honest it matters like how you know my favorite part of the wheel and I know we always debate this time but my I'm gonna say like I love the hats I do love the hats I don't agree how about the sails I love them so you heard everything we're ruined so captain trail nailed the passageway shot so now John and his family would have to walk through all

the sick sheckled convicts oh man to get out into the fresh air I know I was less like that's gross but these are also people like we're like they had to walk by they're not people they're convicts it's true good point you do know where you are yeah I'm actually with hammer on this that was rude it's okay it's okay Adelaide's a free settled state and there's no no conflict blood here that's why we all speak correctly yeah yeah Lego thank you very much why you're a fucking Adelaide respect I appreciate that yeah yeah no I believe it's pronounced Lego to you do oh yeah and that's one as a kid I would love

Legos yep I love them yeah play Legos what kind of Lego you know we'd have a Star Wars Legos sorry Star Wars Legos yeah and oh yeah yeah I knew that one yeah and Lego castles I don't know if that's a chance sir it's not a chance alright that's maybe a six-year-old to get behind you that's not it was worth the effort yeah he must be with his kid here and he was like this is the chant you're gonna get behind yeah so father's day watch Daddy and spa you got to be a great man this is how a chant doesn't start son big Legos so Captain trail nailed the passageway shots now they have to walk

through the filthy convicts so John stayed in his room he was angry and pouting and when he did rarely come out which was just to complain about the food he would be angry so trial couldn't take it and he sent MacArthur to travel the rest of the journey on one of the other ships the Scarborough but the damage was done MacArthur fell ill and their infant daughter came down with the sickness and she soon died and this had you know what all babies die in dollops that's like almost all dollops they usually start with and nine babies died yeah this one's about the one that lived she had a hell of a run she had a

great run love Legos well how many babies get to fucking be on a ship with shitting ladies and buckets and stuff like she saw more than you guys have ever seen in her in her couple of months or whatever happened anyway they ate the baby what I might I might have just added that okay so John survived though many of the convicts didn't when the ship arrived in New South Wales 30% were dead and 50% were sick right so there was 20% on top that was yeah 20% were fine and fucking those guys were loving it yeah I'm sure they were loving it now in New South Wales Lieutenant John MacArthur's plan was pretty much just to

get a quick promotion and then head back to England Major Francis Gross ran the Corps in the colony he was major gross grow yeah okay let's say you say it sure I was I'd spell that way no you're right on gross yep I was just saying it's weird that a guy named major gross you know because this is gross go ahead gross was very different from Governor Phillip in that he was lazy and obese gross was really not happy that he was getting convict rations his response to this problem was to push his officers to import their own food ten officers got together formed an organization and were able to trade using IO use they were

given as pay by Britain at the time the British East India company had a monopoly on all food that came into the colony and there was no actual currency the officers just declared everything they brought in as for their own personal use and then they started selling it and making profits mm-hmm good business model yeah one captain of a British East India ship had gotten permission from Governor Phillip to be the only ship allowed to bring in and sell porter but he used his ship to bring in illegal spirits what topical we're worried in American we're gonna build the now I'm sad because I'm now I'm sad because that

would be the greatest dollop ever that is Donald Trump's nightmare he's like yeah right so they start selling it and making profits the Mexican ghosts so this is the biggest import of booze ever into the colony and people immediately got shit faced yeah obviously yeah well you know what we're dealing with much intoxication was the consequence several of the settlers breaking out from the restraint of which they've been subject conducted themselves with the greatest impropriety beating their wives destroying their stock trampling on and injuring their crops in the ground and destroying each others property oh they

don't sound drunk no sound like good individuals so John saw this and bells went off he was like that's how you make money he arranged that's how I make money not maybe I should stop yeah oh my god I've got an idea houses on fire this is perfect more of this he arranged for a range for kegs of liquor to be brought in kegs of it I didn't even know that was a thing oh yeah kegs of liquor they had that's what they had tons of keg stands were a lot harder back that's how you transported the all the booze well it sounds delicious there's actually one thing on a British ship where a guy died and to keep the body

no what to keep the body you know together they put it in in booze in a keg and then as they were going back to England the sailors no like well it's fucking booze so they were like fucking tapping in to the fucking drinking like fucking the guy oh yeah that's a stiff drink I feel dirty and clean all the same time and then you know the body's in there and you're like you know when you eat the fruit and sangria I'm just saying oh there's a little bit of Bob in mind no all right that's all back yeah that's good purple part yep not not purple bit the purple part purple bits a whole different that's what

the ladies have from what we hear they're playing just the clip yeah so supposed to be my friends so governor Arthur Philip confronted John MacArthur rather than trying to smooth things over John was such a dick when responding to Philip that Philip threatened to put him in jail and John just said sir you may place yourself you are the first officer that has ever threatened me with arrest and I give you my word of honor if I am put in a rest I shall require a full and sufficient explanation of the cause before I consent to sit quietly down under such a disgrace which is obviously a weird way to talk to your

boss right yeah he was like okay wait what the fuck just happening right now what was the middle where is he wow okay but Philip was so shocked that an officer would talk to him in this way that he just gave in and then asked him to dinner well okay yep would do you have plans tonight I guess yeah follow up like I know we can get some pizza love to get a little Japanese pizza with you yeah just a little one and then John promptly and then John promptly passed which was a huge insult oh my god he said no he took a shit if you put me in prison you fucking tell me why or I'll start screaming shit do you like to go

to dinner so let me get this straight you won't go to jail and you also won't have dinner with me are you nagging me cuz it's working can I sleep with you sorry I don't know what just happened yes wait what I'll fuck you I just don't want to go on a date before it or eat pizza yeah so rum was the drink of semen so come on Adelaide come on Adelaide rum I thought I don't think that was a request and so rum is what the core brought in to the colony John was posted to Rose Hill settlement for four months which was inland there he continued to get into arguments and bug the shit out

of everyone she's yeah wow yeah so he just sucks yeah oh yeah he's just the worst yeah he's the worst he sounds like Christopher Pine that's what he sounds like what just happened these guys don't know and their lives are better than ours is he's a local guy or the guy from the movies you know he's just this guy who wears a suit and calls himself a politician and I don't know like I don't know what the Latin term is that he's sorry I was building to something but what do you have he said he's your Rick Santorum he's a Rick Santorum this year Rick Santorum but I like him in the Star Wars the Star Trek films yeah I think

he's good in those yeah wait you guys think Chris Pine yeah well yeah fuck that Captain Kirk yeah I don't mean to get political that's the name of the next movie fuck that Captain Kirk yeah make a good one anyway so so governor Phillips started giving out land to the military man he didn't want the constant turnover of officers and figured giving them a stake in the place that they were would keep them around this didn't happen anywhere else in the British Empire it would also make the colony more attractive to all the members of the British Army who now wanted nothing to do with New South Wales right yeah Philip

had been resistant to the idea but he finally gave in so the soldiers became farmers for their own personal benefit but they didn't always get along with each other particularly John John really John didn't John was the problem he didn't get along shocking John so amiable normally I'm good with these you're up yeah really nice around this time he was challenged challenged to two duels but he passed on both which was considered very offensive right how is that looking offensive no I don't want to die yeah will you have dinner no what I love you I'm in love with you okay I thought we

should do well now marry me I'll do anything baby need you a crisp pod for you who are the two duels with did I tell you one was a surgeon and one guy surgeon yeah I need was like standing there and he was like gun bullets yeah give me ten paces please give me ten cc's of paces I couldn't find out why he challenged them to a duel but as much as he was being a dick one guy because he's John yeah one guy who challenged him was visiting naval lieutenant John Marshall when MacArthur turned him down there was quite a bit of talk among the

colonies gentlemen about whether or not he'd done the right thing and Marshall lost it called John a rascal and attacked him with a stick yeah well I like something's gonna break you yeah I mean what an amazing tactic that's I mean that's why he kept being a dick nobody like he could just say no to everything and then when he did rock people be like well I'm gonna twig you and insult you mildly now chase me no god damn it he just knows the power of no this is the man who invented no that's what this is no okay so so then Mark then Marshall was charged with assault for hitting him with a stick

imagine being in the big house like oh what are you in here for my I murdered a guy he owed me a lot of money oh fuck what about you mate with a stick whilst I was like yours you're a rascal and I get I was hard as I could I was like yeah and so I'm in prison well keeping on that day away for this yes there was a mischievous crisis I just murdered you like to go to dinner yes I heard him use the R word before so John they actually he actually had a trial what a stick trial yeah yeah what imagine bringing in the evidence yeah yeah as someone brought the stick we

know which branch of government this is and in court disappointing one in court Marshall said quote I cannot avoid expressing my astonishment at the effrontery of Captain MacArthur in my presence in the presence of any man of honor attempting to justify his late conduct the court found for MacArthur and Marshall was guilty right then in 1972 Philip left and returned to England okay now there was no one to control the New South Wales Corps there was no governor to replace him which left a power vacuum and New South Wales Corps a leader a major Francis Gross

stepped in to fill the void he's in control of the colony and was named Lieutenant Governor remember he's the lazy the lazy fat guy he really didn't give a shit about anything but his boys the first thing he did was increase the soldier's rations and decrease everyone else's hmm notice everything he has done so far spent about food yeah I say we attack the cheesecake from both sides I'll cause a distraction yeah cause a distraction we'll get into this we need more cheese cake it's gone he then approved sorry Gareth was showing me what happened last night he had a lot of cheesecake he then approved officers of

the Corps importing goods even though the British East India Company had a monopoly Gross was able to issue Treasury bills which he did and used them to buy supplies from an American ship which of course included a lot of rum now the British government did not want booze in the colony so he told them the American captain wouldn't sell him the supplies if the booze wasn't included Wow she's just total horseshit smart though yeah it worked up until now it had been a rule that there would be no spirits in the colony for the first time a man in charge was importing rum oh no yeah and Gross sold the booze to his officers who

sold the rum to the convicts at huge markups up to 1200 percent wow because you know the my issue with rum is it just doesn't fuck you up enough right no you need to have yeah up the run up the run a run up yeah the convicts would choose to buy liquor over anything over food over clothing anything that's good yeah that's good a bunch of naked I mean not eating and drinking is good yeah yeah I don't have rum for dinner yeah pretty sure I'll pay you my socks awesome yeah tomorrow will be weird I'm out of clothes you know I'll eat your cheesecake

well don't do it man oh well don't do it you gotta believe in yourself since there was no money since there was no money in the colony farmers would pay labors with whatever they could tobacco sugar food handkerchiefs etc but now chips how about four handkerchiefs absolutely yes I have a runny nose I would but now there was rum and that's all the labors wanted his pay rum basically became the currency of the colony by the end of 1793 the core were importing stills and basically making currency in the form of rum workers are getting their wages in jugs that's hard that's hard to hide underneath the

mattress like where the fuck do you invest why do you know I mean don't touch the bed waterbed what what man David Collins summed it up quote to such excess was the pursuit carried among the convicts that some had been known after losing provisions money and all their spare clothing to have staked and lost the very clothes on their wretched backs standing in the midst of their associates as naked as and as indifferent about it as the unconscious natives of their country it's a good scene right they took a little dig there yeah sure yeah that's what you want cool yeah yeah a Spaniard came to Sydney in

1793 and couldn't believe all the naked guys who wanted to play gets off under come ticking to it yeah am I insane your frogs where am I he couldn't believe all the naked guys who wanted to play him in carts what yeah wanted to gamble and try to wait for a shirt yeah gotta win their clothes back yeah gonna buy more right then what do you go all in with I'll kill myself I'm all in I bet my dick sir for the last time you can't bet your dick I bet my dick tell it double or nothing what do you double or nothing with do not say your

balls for the last time if you say your balls you're out of the game I'm out of stuff my dick do you have an extra dick sweet god don't answer that I think he might hey Joe come over here he's calling you I'll put my dick in for him he's a good pal yeah he's lazy on a hot streak he said there was constant abusive liquor and frequent baseless duels I don't want to do all the past the time do you want to shoot at each other I'm bored we should do all yeah fuck you're talking to a post the women would just walk up and quote announce the price at which they would sell their favors so they won't sorry the women

would just walk up and say how much for my the favors my favors yeah like you know need me to pick you up from the airport that sort of shit right David I put some money down on that yeah yeah any other favors yeah yeah new South Wales help me move I'm full of room new South Wales became known as the new South Wales core became known as the rum core and MacArthur was right in the middle of it his job was to keep all the records of imports and being right there in the center of it all he had his hand in everything the officers formed a trade monopoly and would buy product and then sell it at insane prices then

total control the market at that point MacArthur came up with a plan to invest the unpaid wages of soldiers in buying rum so the entire monopoly and rum importation situation was being bankrolled by the British government all good it's all good sounds fine yep any trader who tried to do business with someone other than the core found themselves boycotted and anyone in the colony who tried to import would be beaten as was anyone making moonshine so they're basically they're basically organized labor right but organized crime syndicate it's good yeah fair so the convicts were brought here and then

the soldiers were worse great yeah great the convicts were like man I wish the soldiers were here Jesus terrible all I did was still a fucking handkerchief I hit a man with a twig I was so abusive my god what did you say the land I don't even want to recount it you have to tell me the language was vicious it was a different me did you use the our word yes yes I did you know your brother is an our word your sister's an our word your mother's an our word then you call someone else and I would I'm from rascals to real to real rascal to real nine more years not the hole again then then gross fired all the

civilian magistrates and replaced them the military officers John MacArthur was made magistrate of paramata paramata paramata paramata might the military officers use chopped up charges to prosecute anyone who fuck with their business interests and the juries were made up of the core so conviction convictions were super easy and they started taking payments to reduce convict sentences it sounds like a really good judicial system yeah sounds really perfect and then they started taking payments to increase people's sentences right oh shit man you had to go down on the right day put an hundred down to

take ten off no today's ten on oh I'm so sorry can I put my dick in I would love to so if someone was like I don't want that guy getting out they'd pay him and they'd be like sorry buddy you're gonna die wait what yeah that guy didn't like you you had a hundred bucks but gross was not that into power because of the super lazy thing and he declared quote I am unequal to manage by myself yeah I love that it got charges like I'm not good enough I can't do this I was wrong I also like when he talks he uses all the words do you know I mean like it's not just I don't know if I'm very good at this I am unequal to the task it's

always all the words yeah he doesn't know he doesn't like to you know spare with words yeah it would be so nice he wants to that woman really wanted to hear the rest of the song you should do the right thing ladies laryngitis bring it on so MacArthur made MacArthur sorry Grossman MacArthur the Inspector of Public Works for the new settlement of Paramatta the problem with appointing John to rub public works was that John didn't believe in public works John sound like in America though when people get hired for positions you're like the new head of FEMA was a car dealer you're

like I don't think he's ready for that those are organizations you guys aren't familiar with so that is whoa I think I think the ghost of John is here oh yes we are we got just throw a stick of me and call me a rascal hey throw a stick of me and call me a rascal the Gareth Randall's story Gareth is played by Dolly Pum I just found out I suffer from regularity this might get dramatic John strongly believed that farm should be privatized so people could make money rather than just doing that bullshit of feeding people right people like himself should make money right right now John was in charge of doling

out the land on the Cumberland Plain and he went right about giving the shittiest rockiest most barren land to freed convicts and some settlers who came the quality land with the nice soil he gave to his buddies and he grabbed himself a hundred acres the best land in the area I mean he was lucky that is just pure luck totally yeah fell into that he gave it the name Elizabeth farms for his wife and then he kept giving himself more and more and more land he was now what he'd always wanted to be since he was a kid no longer the son of an underwear maker he was a land odor he was a gentleman it's weird for the son of

an underwear maker to be such a huge asshole could he use daddy gross told Britain that the soldiers were working the land themselves but in truth he gave each of them several convicts to do all the work so convicts who were being fed and taken care of by the British government were now working the land of military officers instead of public lands and Britain said word that the core officers could use no more than two convicts to work the land so the officers just ignored it good right and Britain was like stop being like this please do it properly yeah they won't listen when

that letter came down months later yeah I remember that gosh things aren't good but just the idea of seeing just drunk guys out there working the land with no clothes on yeah and they just keep saying no they're like no everyone's like what are we gonna do next MacArthur was also I already that okay MacArthur was also in charge of doling out the convicts to work so he made sure he and his fellow officers got the best workers well the guys he didn't like or settlers were given the most ill-equipped to work convicts I'm excited to work for you I'm tired already because the public farms were now John's competitors the

non-military officer farms got convict laborers with tuberculosis or who were missing arms god you like no don't help don't help yeah stay there or who were missing arms oh good you're gonna do a lot of the foot planting or who were quote unnaturally interested in the colony's limited supply of livestock yeah this shit the sheep fuckers some call some convicts drunk they were naked and they were like this is a butthole and then they just fucking move in and try to make a baby with the the sheep and that's that's how that's how we got out of late hey I thought I would have believed if you said that's how we got

the platypus but you'd be like you know what it actually is kind of cute so let's make more rum ducks let's do this what are you doing over there just making some rum ducks but also if you hire these at your fucking farm and you're like is it just me or are they god damn it they're not tilling anything except the sheep ass I like working on your farm when I said plant seeds what I meant I was very clear I planted a bunch today I planted a planted a planted a planted a planted you'll have no crops though I'll be like rum duck John made sure the public farms turned to shit the convicts working the public farms were given

smaller rations and then made to basically do overtime at John's corp buddies farms after they finished a day of working the public farms the public convicts housing was also blown down during a storm and John just didn't rebuild it well it's down what are you gonna do don't worry my sheep wife will keep me warm yeah just sleep under those rum ducks hi Bella the room for two yeah you know why he gave a name to the sheep that fucked it just too real like they could picture Bella before they looked all the same but in my head she's like into it she's like morning honey

it's gonna move in behind you honey someone's ran it is more than a big morning a planting rum duck before we do it can we make the Parker's dinner at six next week I never responded oh come on they're good people well she pull actually they're good she pulled I just don't want to get caught in a conversation with him again oh here we are gosh you know if we're gonna do this you're gonna need to talk to male sheep why the fuck you talking to that sheep this is my wife I'm his wife why is it bang at me can he not hear the love we have I don't think he can quit talking to that cheap we're together sir quit

talking to that cheap and fucking I'm in line I've been cheating on you what I'm so sorry had to find out this way well I might as well take this rum duck off and go to bed well good night always wear a duck when having sex take the take the from duck off I'm obsessed fair it's fair I don't want I don't want to over out but I think rum duck is the best thing I've heard all year I want to own a rum duck I want a t-shirt with a rum duck on it next time when we come here I want to ride rum ducks onto the fucking stage buddy was a young man hard man playing in the street listen to yourselves when

it when this is up when you're down you download it seriously listen to yourselves we'll be selling rum ducks in the lobby actually this has been a long tie-in so John McArthur would fuck people over all the time in 1799 what happened is it a flying thing he's free at these very dead free thing yeah feel free to rock so it's 1799 there was an convict overseas overseer named Isaac Nichols who refused to give out enough convicts to the officers so MacArthur framed him for receiving stolen tobacco and he was tried in the ridiculous court full of military men and given hard labor it was also difficult to find

quality workers who knew what to do on a farm a lot of the convicts were city people who had stolen a handkerchief thankfully there was a group but I'll never fully absorb the idea of handkerchief theft I think they were worth a lot of money still they're fancy silky things that you could do nice stuff with I gotta go so thankfully there was a group of people who could do farm labor and they were known as the Irish they knew how to farm a lot of Irish were put on prison ships for the long-standing crime of being Irish yeah or just sounding weird yeah it's amazing to be put in jail for something less

than the twig rascal man yeah one Irish woman was put in jail and sent to Australia for stealing a sock one sock yeah not two yeah but it's what he did with that sock I picture in a fucking shape come on that was too far now the core office the core office didn't have much interest in opening shops or and going the retail route so they would end up selling wholesale to convicts who then began opening stores and basically an economy was born houses started popping up and food became more available and there was a baby boom right so that's the first Westfield Center that's what that is I agree to be honest

sometimes I just say things for them pie face it's my go-to happy Jax but don't know whispering it's a podcast I love the Mars bar my mouth yeah yeah I like what's inside it not the outside big brown melty yeah I'm a chocolate right yeah sometimes hopefully yeah yeah I don't like white chocolate as much yeah that's the this is the only place in the world where that's offensive but back in Britain officials started to become concerned about the giant booze party happening in the colony in 1794 gross left the colony due to his worsening condition from wounds he had

received in fighting in the American Revolutionary War and the British government then sent Governor John Hunter to New South Wales to crack down on the core he was the perfect man for the job as he had never run anything perfect as captain he had sunk three ships and Philip had once sent him back to England to be court-martialed so he was told to end the rum trade so good yeah so a hundred gets off the ship with a big head of steam ready to whip these fucks it was probably just like it's nice to be on one that didn't sink now what's the problem but first thing we're talking MacArthur takes him to a public

farm that is in shit condition because of the policies MacArthur had set up on that on that farm the workers were sober and unhappy and had no idea how to farm so then MacArthur shows Hunter private farms where the workers are drunk and he says it just works better this way when you get renovations you always want them hammered don't you these guys seem really miserable well wait till you see the drunk guys they're terrible but so happy and so it looked like the drunk guys knew how to farm and Hunter ended up ignoring everything he was sent to do about the farms he was the right hire yeah the British are just like but what

are we doing wrong what the fuck pasta Hunter then turned on the real enemy he blamed the women in the colony for everything right he said they were quote at the bottom of every infamous transaction in the colony he thought they did nothing while men worked away to provide for them he told England not to send any more women to the colony he only wanted men and naked ones preferably yeah and a few more sheep yeah worst tender profile ever shirtless also wacky but Hunter did realize near a baby tiger for sure but Hunter did realize something had to be done he decided to bring back civil

magistrates and get rid of the military magistrates grossed put in place he fired MacArthur as magistrate and put a Reverend Madsen in his place Madsen and MacArthur were rivals so it was a double insult and now Madsen had Hunter's ear and he started telling him how bad the core were and to make matters worse Hunter then made one of MacArthur's friends Richard Atkins the deputy judge advocate Atkins was a well-known well-bred man whose brother was an admiral but who liked drinking endlessly and was known to take his clothes off when he was on a bender right so this just become the culture of just when you get

drunk your naked that's how you tell it someone's drunk yeah you should hear what they say about the people who don't take their clothes off you're in the corner go look over here that arsehole yeah sure don't put his tie still around his neck was yeah yeah I trust that yeah I'm drunk so you ever have you ever have a buddy who used to get naked when he get drunk yeah John Faust so weird yeah it happened many like there were just sometimes there just be a guy you'd be like oh he's drunk because you like hey can I talk to you about my family and you bet oh god we need John in high school it would be all at a party to

house and also be naked I yeah John's naked again yeah so then now we're talking about a world where it's full of John's yeah John's yeah just John's walking around yeah pretty much so then if you have to be the John in the world of John's you got a fuck sheep I mean it's simple math yeah now John Atkins Richard Atkins was in New South Wales because he was avoiding creditors anyway right off the bat he accused a couple of soldiers that's why we all got we got a new South Wales to avoid creditors right around the bat he accused a couple of soldiers of stealing turnips MacArthur was pissed hopefully they'll

turn up at some point MacArthur was pissed and sent a letter of inquiry to Mr. Richard Atkins a guy who had been his friend forever and now Atkins was pissed because the letter was not addressed to Richard Atkins Esquire and he would not respond to MacArthur except to say quote it is further sir necessary for me to inform you that any letter directed to Mr. Richard Atkins will be returned unopened MacArthur then brought Hunter into this childlike fight but Hunter agreed MacArthur should not call Atkins Mr. so MacArthur went full MacArthur and sent a letter oh boy quote a man so deeply plunged in

infamy a man so vile a public cheater living in the most boundless disposition without any visible means of maintaining it I will prove that in his public and official capacity drunkenness and indecency are almost inseparable from him thank God this asshole didn't have Facebook because he's dead as up top for making me kill myself yeah unfollow this feed holy shit so so MacArthur accused Atkins of being a highway robber a counterfeiter and that he walked on naked a lot and Mac and Atkins responded saying MacArthur was quote a dastardly coward the baseness of whose heart even imagination however arm can

hardly portray despicable littleness pervades your every action return to your original nothing this really I mean this is like this is like a Twitter feud but it's like this is gonna take a while finally a notification not favoriting this we know that you have been what you are now and believe me an honest industrious staymaker is more honorable and a more useful member of society than such a man as I hold you to be of a viper you bite a file the day of retribution will come and believe me it is not far off when you should be dragged forward by the strong arm of justice to public view as a monster of society the

assassin that constitutes true humor you are a leper in reputation and then you ought to be driven from society of all good men least you should be infectious and he signed at your humble servant two stars worse review ever you say bite a file yeah what yeah bite a file I mean look they had stuff that we don't know about clearly hunter was now completely against MacArthur vampires a bite a file no they didn't buy files they bite people well I'm going off of other files I've learned of these reactions over here are strange yeah hunter was not completely against MacArthur and asked England to recall the core saying they

were quote a set of the worst most atrocious characters that have ever disgraced human nature good three years after becoming governor MacArthur managed to enforce the only two convicts working on a private farm rule meanwhile MacArthur was on the offensive suddenly pamphlets began showing up at work using hunters right-hand manned of trading and rum the man's reputation in tatters he killed himself Jesus another aid was sent back for selling liquor to a soldier MacArthur was isolating hunter at the same time he was writing letters back to England saying hunter was skirting his

duties how to respond by taking trips into the bush to find animals to sketch on one he discovered the platypus which he killed and stuffed what which what he killed and stuff the first look how fucking cool this thing is by the way though when you're stuffing animals in this time it's very different yeah no I know that's what you do with new things when you find them yeah I want it forever let's stuff it on April 16th 1800 Philip Gidley King arrived to relieve hunter of his duties King was now the governor Hunter was devastated but he was given command of the HMS venerable which he quickly sank yeah he

wanted to get out the way first order of business the car third rid himself of hunter and was now planned to destroy at kids at Martson hey guys we're we're doing all right we just had big out just had big aloft I did yeah I missed it I told you it was gonna happen yep yeah anyone who opposed him was going to suffer meanwhile King started going after the core he lowered rum imports set up a public warehouse that cut into the course profits gave convicts to landowners who would actually take care of them what is he trying to do ruin everything yeah he's fucking up the party we have a great

new drunk farming industry going now where you pay them and ramen cheap but carter told his fellow officers to turn down King's dinner invitations which was apparently like a boot to the face about as insulting as one could get when the now head of the core William Patterson accepted an invitation MacArthur was furious and told King it was Patterson who told all the officers to refuse his invitations he then gave King letters in which Patterson was talking shit about King and then he started rumors about Patterson's wife that he had learned from a letter that Patterson's wife had sent to his wife

Patterson charged MacArthur to a duel they were rules to dueling now you were supposed to have a second guy there to load the weapon but MacArthur just loaded his own and then shot and dropped Patterson wait it sounds like he broke all the rules yeah he just killed him right yeah that's what happened we do it on 10 don't we yeah then MacArthur walked over to the barely alive Patterson and strutted around him mocking him I show boats after the duel he was the first Cassius Clay yeah he probably did a little moonwalk by the referee throws a flag no no that in my house so this is very very against the norms so wait he

just killed him and then he's like whoo dynasty dynasty well that was it governor King sent MacArthur to London to be court-martialed he wrote a letter explaining all of MacArthur's actions and sent three copies of the letter one with a core member who thought MacArthur was a dick because of what he did in the in the duel so King figured he could trust him that guy ship sank good the second guy's letter was stolen from his possessions while he was on his ship and the last letter he sent with MacArthur which MacArthur probably used to you know wipe his bottom so instead of having a court-martial authorities

reprimanded King for pointlessly sending a good soldier back to him my god you just wrong is right in this world yeah meanwhile MacArthur went on an endless shit talking and starting rumors tour of London about King sold really well music great podcast King was helpless being a New South Wales and he began drinking more and more then his gout began began acting up and he started having outbursts King became paranoid about the core and replaced his guards with convicts good good call at the same time in was having a wool shortage due to Napoleon cutting off supplies MacArthur saw an opportunity

he said he was the best sheep man in the colony and it's some truck guys like hold on I am the best sheep man you don't make them come no sorry no sorry no no no no different business different industries you reach around no don't help don't help don't help don't help no no no no no no no no do not help no we're talking about wool the thing that we will share from them you are doing my little sleep for a week when I'm done cuz they're like that was so good they call me prisoner cock what just happened to die I can't find and I don't think I have pants sorry have you seen my sheep I had 80 did you say you had no pants and where are my sheep do

you think cheaper pants well I put them on stop putting them on yeah stop putting them on I speak for all of us when I say don't put them on anymore don't say anything else I really do not say another word I'll be very clear with you again get out of here sir I get out of Jesus Christ yeah I drink I drink Stella he's had enough shape fucking yeah yeah no he's earned enough I can't take this boner anymore they keep talking about I'm one's gonna release the crackin in the back and so MacArthur says if he is given a quality flock and just ten just 10,000 acres of land he'd be he'd be

banging out wool in no time okay banks the man in charge who happened to own a flock of prized merino sheep said no but MacArthur was MacArthur and he uses connections in government to get an export exemption behind banks back then he bought some of banks own sheep at an auction and off he went to New South Wales okay on June 8th 1805 King watched as the man he had sent to be court marshal arrived for the bunch of sheep and a letter from the Secretary of Colonies giving him immunity from prosecution and granting him 5,000 acres of the best land in the country man so he's bulletproof yeah he just he

thought he was gonna go to jail and he comes rolling in 5,000 acres right yeah I mean you can't even know that you own it you're like is this even my what the fuck how many I can't and he would get 30 convicts to work on his land and he was no longer in the military so King couldn't prosecute it's like Oprah was like sir we're gonna turn your life upside down you're getting an acre you're getting an acre look under your chairs there's acres Oprah there are not acres under our chairs okay King had no choice and honored the letter very soon after word came in

King was to be replaced because he could not get along with the military officers in New South Wales. MacArthur had totally nuked King he was finished but MacArthur and the course victory was short-lived as Bank said sent a man who was quote firm and disciplined civil and department and not subject to whimper and whine when severity if discipline is wanted the new governor was William Bly yeah it's turned into a pantomime love that guy he's behind you hello I'm dying Bly did not like the idea of guys like MacArthur having loads of land at all he envisioned a colony of many men working their small plots but he put a

stop to large land grants although he did grant himself 2,000 acres first well isn't that the way it always works though like the second year in power you're like it needs to be more equal for everyone I'll have the best palatial spread you've ever seen I will Bly I'll take care of you guys Bly went to war on MacArthur going after his businesses and ordered him prosecuted for importing stills he called MacArthur an arch fiend but Bly wasn't just pissing off MacArthur he was pissing off a lot of people two businessmen to move to the colony after being promised land and convicts to work it Bly gave them 15% of the land they

were promised and just three convicts one was an old guy with one arm with my right no and one I know hello I wink and wave with my right another was asthmatic and the third and the third was a moron hey I think these guys are healthy wait his arm go and though you're only supposed to have one or wait yeah one one yeah mm-hmm he then pissed off traders by putting three of their leaders in jail he implemented fixed wages and pissed off the workers anyone asking for a raise was sent to the stocks or made to work hard labor she's just right now that's not negotiating I want to raise yeah how

about jail I'm cool with working for what I was making yeah no oh shit tell my wife bye no she's dead oh god oh wait the sheep yeah we ate her well bad news the rump rose is very tender oh I mashed it so you tend to rise it that's what I was doing I'm a chef I wasn't fucking sheep you would make a nice hammer in it yeah hammer in it hammer and lose everybody what's happening they're still here everyone left right so he called the core body cards quote tremendous buggers wretches and villains now why also asked not finally yeah why also asked Britain to recall the core by offered to compensate MacArthur if

he would quit some of his land but MacArthur said no MacArthur then bought supplies and got men to fence his land in for he could start an official showed up and told them he had to take down any fences MacArthur then put up the fence like what around him while he's saying that please are you fencing me in what no fences after the fence was finished it was removed and all materials confiscated MacArthur accused the government of stealing he called Bly a dictator and the colonists agreed Bly had crossed a line now people were worried Bly would seize their property in December 1807 shit went south fast a convict

escaped from one of MacArthur's trading ships and Bly find him MacArthur wouldn't pay Bly then confiscated the ship then MacArthur said he wasn't gonna pay the crew since the government now in the ship now they're a bunch of angry starving sailors looking for someone to pay and they started going apeshit in Sydney Bly ordered MacArthur arrested for letting the sailors go ashore without permission and MacArthur responded nah they're not yet they're not mine the year sailors that's exactly what he did yeah MacArthur was then arrested you guys are being all weird yeah MacArthur was then arrested the jury was made up

of core members and drunk Richard at Atkins so great that if you're drunk you're allowed to serve hey I'll be on the jury hi can we nap during deliberations I have your honor yes I have a question yes hi that is not a question and don't raise your hand anymore all right now under the procedural part of this do not read what yes may I yeah what hi okay not questions don't raise your hand anymore a play about two you twelve drunk men who have to have a deliberation with no snacks called twelve angry men I hang Jerry cut that one out

MacArthur was arrested so the right so MacArthur said Atkins was biased and shouldn't be on the jury and he owed him money and he wanted to remove the officers of the court agreed then Atkins screamed that he would put MacArthur in jail then another officer said he'd put Atkins in jail and then all the core members watching the trial cheered I guess that ran off to talk to Bly and Bly asked the guy now in charge of the court Johnston to go to the court and get his soldiers in line Johnston said he couldn't because he had been partying the night before and totaled his

carriage well I mean wait wait wait wait never drink and ride is it DUI you got a DUI he's driving his axle crash he crashed his truck hold on in order to get the horses to move I have to blow into this you really didn't need to do that but I appreciate it wait you're the judge I am oh my god well I got a keep going MacArthur was then put in jail and Bly threatened the core officers in court with treason the next day Johnson with 300 soldiers marched on Bly's government house but they weren't an angry mob they're playing musical instruments and singing songs so they

were a jolly mob this is the same effect as like flaming torches and pitch forks Australia's version of a revolution there was music there was catering there was no violence except by Bly's daughter who hit them with her part Parasol the soldiers entered the house and searched for Bly who they found hiding under a bed for the rest of his life he made made fun of for hiding under the bed Bly was no longer in charge wait wait wait wait wait for the rest of his life yeah they would never never would people stop making fun of him yeah looking for a bed yeah so this became known as the rum

rebellion especially the rum rebellion okay I could have punched it up for him especially created posts of colonial secretary was given to MacArthur who virtually administrated the colony until Lieutenant Colonel Joseph Fovaro Fovaro arrived in Sydney on July 28th and took command MacArthur then returned to farming and soon became involved in other ventures as he tried to get rich he dabbled in whaling and sea hunting also the sandalwood trade and of course pork by 1808 he had spread himself way too thin then in 1809 MacArthur and other rebels went to England to defend Johnson in his trial for taking over the colony

before he left he tried to sell his land but there were no takers upon arriving in Bristol in 1810 MacArthur had learned that commercially quote the times are frightfully hazardous in other words he was tits up and was now in a huge amount of debt car that went back to Johnson's court Marshall because he was a civilian and he had no worry of being tried himself back in England MacArthur became a vegetarian smart yeah well he knew yeah it's easy to become a vegetarian we're like nobody's fucking cucumbers I'll actually take some lettuce oh my god

a man's fucking cute that's not a cucumber those are not cucumbers it's it's he painted his dick green again no hi there's hi hi this one in my excuse me I put them in my bottom oh it's disgusting yeah I really he hi don't stop saying hi first of all and looking at him yeah you fuck it hi stop saying hi all you do is fuck things and say hi right that's my name oh your name's hi no my name's fuck okay goodbye good opposite of hi opposite of hi to you MacArthur became depressed as he had ruminated as any ruminated on everything

he had lost he also learned he could no no longer go back to his wife in the colony because the new governor Macquarie have been have been ordered to try him as quote the leading promoter instigator of the mutinous measures if he did I mean it's pretty biased yeah he also did not want to bring his wife and kids back because they were living a nice life in Australia but in England he was shit poor then he started thinking about how awesome the wool business was again he also thought about getting into the wine business but in the end he knew he had to get back to the colony to improve his fortune after extensive

negotiations Colonel Secretary Bathurst did allow MacArthur to return it was eight years after he'd left the only condition was that he just farm and not get up to any other business and no politics and that's how our border control is now as well just come in mate are you gonna be alright yet no fucking come in mate MacArthur did very much did did very much like MacArthur's wife sorry Macquarie did very much like MacArthur's wife and he decided to leave the past in the past and get along with John but John was John yeah he wanted more land and Macquarie

wasn't giving it up so MacArthur acted to Macquarie's face as if he supported him it was loyal to him but he was actually taking every chance he could to shit on Macquarie's every action when a commissioner John Thomas Big arrived in the colony to investigate the administration MacArthur worked him and worked him by the time Big sent his report back it ripped into Macquarie on every level and called MacArthur an agricultural genius and that but that is the truth though right it's like the people who complain get the most shit yeah like the people at the restaurant are like get free

food the people at the airport like I'm pissed they go to the front of the line so this is just the dude who's just complained his whole fucking life and just got in the head the and the report also supported John's idea of making the colony a feudal aristocracy made up of aristocracy made up of men who would produce wool for the British Empire Big's report opened opportunities for MacArthur's wool Macquarie resigned and left in 1822 he took a bunch of kangaroos to give his friends wait what happened wait what you just spent through that you took a bunch of kangaroos to give his friends in England right wouldn't you

oh I love the pouch I'll keep my debit card inside this cigarette can you come with me with more belonging come along Kangie but Carthor then once again began selling wool in England and his wool was now suddenly in demand he won awards for his wool in 1824 he had become one of the wealthiest colonists in New South Wales and in 1825 he was appointed to his first legislative council but it seemed like his bouts of being an asshole were increasing now that he was in a position of authority his temperament was exposed to all then the governor Ralph Darling had constant fights with MacArthur then MacArthur

began to withdraw and spend more time at home finally he stopped communicating with the governor altogether darling said quote he's now a wayward child and remains at home brooding but MacArthur wasn't done he tried to get the chief justice of the Supreme Court impeached for ruling against his son in a case and anything that was public that he became involved in defending turned into fighting then in 1829 for absolutely no sane reason he was appointed back to the reformed legislative council he continued on the council until he was removed in 1832 by Governor Bork on the ground that he'd become quote pronounced

a lunatic finally that's such a good pronouncing yeah you're you're just a lunatic I don't know what to tell you you are out of your tits legally he was taken by his family to the Liverpool lunatic asylum where he was declared a nutter I love that it was a lunatic asylum and the doctor was like your son suffers from being a nutter yeah the declaration of lunacy read John MacArthur for these three months last past has been so depressed of his reason and understanding that he is all together unfit and unable to govern himself or to manage his own affairs the official observed there was little hope of

restoration because he was wealthy he was probably cared for at a home he died in April 1934 at the age of 65 he is considered to have founded the Australian wool industry and was later on the two-dollar note and he is a cunt yeah yeah that's why we got rid of the two-dollar note yeah the true story no more controversy I mean I thought America was fucked up that's yeah it's really something special yeah just naked farming and like yeah the whole farm is making farming yeah it says it all it's just real did he just say vagina just say vagina yeah that was the word vagina like just cut straight to the point

yeah there's a guy in the front where I was like vagina yeah he's the opposite like he uses only one of the words like there was all the words and now like cut all the words out vagina you know exactly what's going on you guys thank you very much we do really appreciate you guys coming out on father's day nobody he knows their father this is a bad time to bring it up listen Adelaide we love you so thank you thank you to Justin Hamilton give it up for Justin we will yeah we can we'll sign a car if you want a car signed listen to us if you want a car sign bullshit if you want a car signed about a half hour 45 minutes

yeah in I mean I know we're saying to wait a minute to have your car signed but think about how fucking weird it is to get a car signed so yeah we'll be out there in a little bit and we'll sign automobiles and thank you very much for coming out we appreciate it guys have a great evening