The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 222 - Marion Zioncheck (live w/ Wil Anderson)

Episode Date: November 27, 2016

Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds are joined by Wil Anderson as they examine Marion Zioncheck live in Seattle.   SOURCES TOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH

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Hi. Thank you. Hi. Seattle. Thank you for coming out. Congratulations on having water. That's cool. The rumors were true. LA we just read about it. Yeah. I mean eventually we're going to take it. So we should have a guest tonight. You're going to like this kid. Fresh off the boat. Really funny. We just found him. He was just going to open my room. We had a type 5 so we said we can water this seat and have a fun point. And we watered it and by water we were going to give it a pop.

And it just learned to be so funny. Welcome to Will Anderson. I'm going to type that. Hi Seattle. It's nice to be here. Will Anderson is showing us the newest news video of a Bogan. Which is like a redneck. A truck had driven through a shop in the middle of it. He ran out of his underwear and caught it. He tells a great story. If you have the YouTube's, check it out. He keeps telling the female reporter, Mike. Mike. You're listening to the dollar. This is a bi-weekly American History podcast. Each week I read a story from American history to my friend.

Gareth Reynolds. We've been over this so many times. Who has no idea what the topic is going to be about. With Will Anderson. With the side of Will Anderson. The number one podcast in the world. We're number one on iTunes right now. Overall. We just threw money at it. Before we start, can I ask one more question? I'm a big fan of your podcast. Did I not just do that? No. You haven't done it for months.

What did you do? I think the success of your podcast is going to your head. It's weird that since you stopped doing that, the numbers are growing exponentially. Fuck you. No, no, no. I just have fun. Remember? Put the iPad down. I'm going on a rift. I'm going riffin'. There he goes. Like a wild animal. Okay, I didn't know I wasn't doing that. I knew something was off. I couldn't figure it out.

It's such a hard speech to remember. Really true. December 5th, 1901. What a terrific audience. Tremendous. Tremendous audience. Tremendous audience. We're going to make you better. So unbelievable. I won't even believe it again. I won't. Too soon.

It's going to be too soon for four years. Come on, Dave. America's not going to last four more years. That is amazing. What an 18 months it's going to be. I was jumped on board this Titanic for a close look at the iceberg. You're like a scientist studying. Just rowing away from it. Good eye. Good eye.

The number of emails I got from Australia. Your wife can work here. She has a doctorate. She can just come here and work. Come on. Get out of there. Run. I've been getting a lot of emails from Nigerian princes since then. I'm making a killing. They have some good programs. I'm up like 9 million. Marion and Tony Zajizek.

Good start. What? Do you know what it is? Zajizek's are here. Does anybody know what it is yet? No. One guy decided to speak for everybody. No. No. No one knows what it is. I do kill him.

I thought it was going to be Zeppelin putting the fish in a girl's vagina. Shark. But I heard it wasn't actually a shark. Red snapper. The irony. It's the cycle. It happens once a month. Who put a snapper in... Let Zeppelin.

Let Zeppelin fuck the girl with a fish. Dave? Yep. Happened here in Seattle. In Seattle at the fish markets? Because if they threw it in... I would watch that. They swim upstream. It went out the mouth. Very fast process.

Instinctive beasts, the salmon. And they love...they love Poty. Is that a weird thing to say? Are you checking on the phone? No, I'm not catching Pokemon, although my son has ordered me to get a ditto while I'm here. Anyone want to give Dave a ditto while he's here? A ditto. You better give me a ditto.

Okay, Marion and Tony Zizizek was born in Kedi, Austria, Hungary, which is now part of Poland. So they're twins. He immigrated to the US when he was three. Wait, what was his name? Marion Zizizek. Okay, cap it up. He migrated when he was three. Not alone, he came with his parents.

And their name was changed to Zionszek. Zionszek. Oh, you have to simplify. Zionszek? I mean, they literally... Isn't that what you pray? It's a Zionszek. You can see.

I mean, they literally changed it to Z-I-O-N-C-H-E-C-K. Like, they were just like... Zionszek? What? Fuck you. We're a Rastafarian bank. After living briefly in Chicago, the family moved to Seattle in 1905. Marion was raised... I love that some people were like, yes, Seattle.

And others were like, we know where these stories go. Or like the idea that you're like, yeah, he's from here. It's probably not a good thing. That was a fun story about how a man revolutionized an economy, all upside. Nothing, nothing will ever be worse than what I did to the people in Melbourne. What I did. I did. I ruined...

I think you think you were on that Penguin Island in your head and that's fine. I ruined 800 people's lives. 802. Marion was raised poor on Beacon Hill. Okay. You're excited about poverty? He went to high school in Olympia? I don't know how that...

I'm assuming they moved in... Okay, guys, you're gonna be allowed to take a local references. I'm assuming he moved and that he wasn't commuting every day? And then he went to the University of Washington in 1919. 1919? Yeah. Unfortunately, he had to drop out of school because he didn't have enough money. He worked for a few years as a lumberjack and on fishing boats.

Classic Seattle. He was trying to save enough money to put himself to college. Wait, he's a lumberjack on a fishing boat? He did both. It was a fishing boat season and then there's a really big fishing rods. I can't lift it. I don't know what we're doing. I mean, the whole thing is just flawed.

You should have seen the rod. It was this big. I once got a treat on this big. It keeps getting bigger. It was a branch. When he was 25, he had enough money and he went back to UW. Local. UWs.

Now he was not only paying for his education, but he was also supporting his parents. He was one of the few students raised in poverty who was at UW, which was largely made up of the privileged young. How different. This difference in inequality would affect his outlook for the rest of his life. He got a bachelor's degree and then went to the UW School of Law. There he kicked off the Merriam-Zioncek way of doing things. He was elected president of the associate students of UW and then he, in a bold move,

what happened? Fuck off. Fuck you. I'm not calling it UW. That's your own little local shit. I'm calling it the letters. Why don't they like Californians? Fuck.

No one's calling it UW. We're not doing that. Just fucking call it dub-dub-dub. Okay, dub-dub. And if you don't like it, look it up at their website. Dub-dub-dub-dub-dub-dub-dub-dub. Very confusing web address. All right, so he went to dub.

Then, in a bold move, he challenged the dominance of the Greek system and the athletic department over UW's funding decisions. He did this while he was campaigning for a new student union building. It didn't go well. Some of the football team grabbed him, shaped his head and threw him in Lake Washington. Well, that's how you know they like you. You're one of them. The runt.

I mean, did they shave his head first so they could throw him further? Yeah. You won't like that wet hair on you. Yeah, can do it. Shave his head and deflate him slightly. I believe that's a football jargon. I follow your game. It was all over the news.

The flight guy, right? That was the thing. Absolutely well. Look at all guys. East Coast, Will. East Coast. Oh, they know the Patriots. Years later, in 1949, what Marion had started became a reality with the financing

and construction of the Husky Union building. Now, you guys know the history of that building. We can move on. It wasn't full of dogs at one point. The Husky Union building feels like a place where bears meet to make love. More honey, my dear. A different kind of bear. Like a Wilford Brimley type.

Wilford Bearley. Yeah. But you can still see what was in his picnic bus. It's a picnic. Wait, what is in here? I just cut a hole in the bus. I ate the sandwiches. It won't take long on faster than your average bear.

You okay? I feel good. Marion was now a full-boned populist. Quote, this is Marion talking in the third person. Always a good sign. As a champion of the poorest students, as opposed to those who belong to the fraternities and sororities, Zioncheck preached the policy of just recognition of all groups on the campus with special favors to none.

He earned a law degree and soon built a reputation as a lawyer fighting for the lower classes, like unemployed workers, radicals, labor union members. He often worked pro bono. He was combative and was often cited for contempt of court. That's a great one. And he even fought a contempt of court once a $25 fine all the way into the Washington Supreme Court. Why? How did they turn down so much stuff?

Yeah, well, they probably were like, just hear it. Honest to God, what? Well, it cost 30 to park, but still. As a member of the Democratic Party, he became a force in Seattle politics in 1931, when he helped lead a recall campaign against Mayor Frank Edwards. Well, he was a dick. Yep. Edwards is trying to sell Seattle City Light, a public utility to a private corporation.

Marion was co-chairman of the recall organization that kicked Edwards out of office. Customers rates dropped by 75% and Zion Check became a local hero. Very nervous. Man of the people watching him be destroyed. Zion Check, what? He said something. Nothing. Subtle thing.

He said something. Zion Check took advantage of his new popularity and ran for Congress. Oh, boy. As FDR and the progressives took over the government, Zion Check was swept into office with them. He was now the representative from Washington State's first district seat, representing Seattle, and Kitsap. That's an app where you can order kittens, right?

Yep. Kitsap. That's the best. Who needs Prozac? He was now an open radical. Marion took office March 4th, 1933. His first term went great. He was respected by his peers and seen as a serious legislator,

though he could occasionally be a little combative. He actually read every single bill that came before the House before he voted, which is now obviously insane. In 1934, the Democrats built up their numbers in Congress. Marion grew more and more popular and was easily reelected. But Marion didn't like things moving so slowly and he began to criticize FDR for some of the lukewarm policies being passed as part of the new deal. Okay.

I want to do a deal. He then became a target of congressmen who were entwined with the rich. Those rich congressmen formed a coalition with the goal of isolating and disemboweling Marion. And it worked. He was iced out. This is around the time that Marion's behavior began to change. Sorry. I mean, here we go.

Now we're in. You just don't know where this one's going to drop. I feel like I'm at an EDM concert and then the DJ says, he's been building it up and he's like, not still going well. On New Year's Day. Oh, no. 1936. I've got a resolution.

And about three in the morning. He went to Twitter. He walked into an expensive apartment building. Lobby in Washington, DC. Completely shit-faced. He's looking for some friends who he could not find. So he woke up every person in the building by turning on the operator's switchboard and yelling into it. It's Larry here.

It's Larry here. Larry. So wait, what does that do, though? That means, I think at that time, there's a switchboard upstairs and you can talk to everyone. So you plug it in and yell to every single apartment. Shit-faced trying to figure that out. How the fuck do I be an operator? Three o'clock in the morning on New Year's Day.

I got a resolution. I'm looking for my pals. Larry. What's your last name, though? Larry. Larry Larry. Quite good trip. I don't feel right.

I made a boom-boom. Excuse me, ma'am, I vomited on your wires. Did someone say, boo-boo, I have this picnic basket with a hole in it. I'm not falling for that. I fell for that on Christmas. Oh, I know. It's one of those sausages that has condiments in it, isn't it? I jerked off brimling.

Is that a different story? He then wished everyone in the building a happy New Year. Strong. Strong clothes. Strong clothes. And then he was arrested. And spent a few hours in jail. He was fined for being drunk and disorderly and disturbing the peace. But the combative Marion was full on back.

He kept it in, mostly in check during his first term in Congress, but now he's letting the real Marion out. There we go. On March 11th, 1936, on the House floor, he started arguing with a Republican Congressman from Oregon, William Equal. Equal asked to speak on the floor, and Marion responded by saying,

quote, does the gentleman from Oregon wish to make a fool of himself? That's pretty good. I'll answer your question with a question. Fuckface. Happy New Year. Larry. Equal responded, quote, if anyone could make a bigger jackass of himself than the gentleman from Washington,

I do not know who it is. Is it part of the reason why you have to be like, you have to be like, it's nice to be so polite? Well, the gentleman from Washington is a real prick. Screw you, gentleman from Washington. How about the gentleman from Oregon suck my balls? I will not suck the gentleman from Washington's balls. There's no way.

If anyone's sucking anyone's balls, the gentleman from Washington is sucking the gentleman from Oregon's balls. The gentleman from Oregon would like to say the gentleman from Washington actually has no balls? The gentleman from Washington does not mind showing his balls. If I may have the floor. The gentleman from Oregon will concede the floor for the balls showing. Finally, a middle ground.

I don't have any. We've got some gentlemen here from Led Zeppelin with a seven. We honor those gentlemen. Senator Salmon. So then Equal threatened to... He said he wanted to kick Marion's ass out in the hallway, but Marion didn't take him up on it. In April, Marion eloped with Ruby Lewis-Nix,

a 21-year-old works progress administration secretary from Texas. She had reached out to Marion after reading about the arrest and a speeding ticket he'd received. So she's like one of those women who write to men in prison, but doesn't want to commit to the whole prison. It's like a Charles Manson. I don't want to write to a real criminal, but who's got three speeding tickets?

I heard she got really shit-faced and yelled into a microphone. Yeah, do that every New Year's. You live around here? Yeah. I like men that are stupid. I got a picnic basket for you. So they hit it off right away. They wanted to get married immediately in Washington, D.C.,

but there was a three-day waiting period, but they could get married in Maryland, so they drove to Maryland where Marion borrowed- By the way, it's nice to be here in America where you have to wait three days to get married, but fucking three minutes- Don't you fucking say it! Don't you say it! It's insane.

I can't kill a fucking robber with my wife! Trust me, I tried. Excuse me? Yeah, that's why she doesn't have a foot. I'm like, look at her. So- It's insane, though. Yeah. Gotta be patient.

You don't want to do something stupid. Assault rifle? Have fun! So- Life's a video game. So they drove to Maryland where Marion borrowed two dollars from a clerk to pay for the marriage license. Hey, we'd like to get married. That'll be two dollars.

Can I get two dollars? Absolutely. Wait. But also, isn't this guy like a successful local politician? Yeah! You don't have two dollars? No, apparently not. The clerk refused-

The clerk refused to take Marion's watch for collateral. What? Even though Marion trades an automobile? He's like, just give me the two. Do you take that? What's it gonna take for us to walk out of here married? You want to see my balls? I'll marry you.

I'll marry you. I'll waive the fee. So, they got married on April 28, 1936. But when reporters asked Marion if he'd gotten married, he told two different stories. Some he told he was married, others told he wasn't married. Finally they asked, finally they investigated, and found the reverend who had married them,

and Paul Deal, who confirmed that he'd married the two. Reporters then asked Marion if, again, if he was married, and he just answered that he was befuddled. It's complicated. The original Facebook update? I'm in a befuddled thing. Hey, I saw you aren't engaged anymore. No, no, it's, it's, it's, we're befuddled.

We're befuddled. We, I love her, but it is a very befuddling time. We're befuddled. They really should have a, they really should have a, We're seeing other conundrums. We're, we're befuddled. We're in an open nightmare. We are, we're in an open nightmare.

They should have a befuddled button on Facebook. Ah, oh, I'd fucking hit. Now, befuddled. No, befuddled. Don't give a shit about that rock, befuddled. That Chinese food looks good, still befuddled. Give now also said the word befuddled enough, it makes no sense anymore.

It's befuddling. How the fuck is befuddled a word? Befuddled. I fucking love befuddled. It's insane. So, who signed off? You know, befuddled used to open for bud honey back in the day. Oh.

Local humor. We are befuddled and they don't know how to play the instruments. How do we? I'm not a drummer. I am actually not even a drummer. I don't have, I'm at bad rhythm. I really have. It's how you play guitar, right?

We are befuddled. What do you want to do? We have no song. We have no car. I'll just sing some shit. Hey! Hey! We don't know what we're doing here.

Not sure how this happened. Anyway, we're pretty befuddled. Yeah. We are befuddled again. So, Marion was further questioned how long he had known Ruby, and Marion said, quote, I met her about a week ago when she called me up one night. She asked me to come down, so I went down and looked her over.

She was okay. Alrighty. Get used to that, rhetoric. Holy shit. Whoa. Whoa. What a sweetie. Honestly.

I looked her over? I looked her over. I looked her over. I checked her taste. I checked. I kicked the tires. I kicked the tires on this one before I drove it around. I read the references.

I read it. You know what? A lot of previous owners. More survivors. She'll get me from point A to point B. Yeah. Good to see the late singer from I Say Day Say, you made it to the start of tonight.

When? So Australian ever. Whatever. That was a big band everywhere. I Say Day Say. They toured with befuddled. It was a nightmare. When the press caught up with them,

Ruby told them, quote, that excitement and hubbub followed Marion wherever he went, and she was glad to go along with him. So that's... Okay. So she likes a circus. One of the things that Marion seemed to suddenly start enjoying

was speeding down streets in his car. Weird hobby. In April, he was pulled over, driving 70 miles an hour in a 25-mile-an-hour zone on Capitol Boulevard. I mean, you have to be. Take it easy, Sammy Hager.

He was issued an appearance ticket, meaning he had to show up to court to explain his behavior to a judge. I just found out that you look like shit. You are so disgusting. Ugh! God! This is an appearance ticket.

Ugh! You're hideous. Was that ketchup on your face? Just give me that ticket. Larry? So, on April 20th, he did not go to court and blew off his appearance.

It's a problem with the appearance ticket. Right. The police officer told the judge, quote, Mr. Zeincheck promised he would come in if it was a nice day. I'm a big fan of it. Here's an appearance ticket. I'll be there if it's pretty out.

If I feel like walking. If it's cloudy, I stay inside. No, no. Well, that's not how we work. I mean, this was the guy who went all the way to the Supreme Court for a fucking $25 ticket. Right? That's priority.

Now he's like, if it's fucking... Like, firstly, if it's bad weather, I'm not coming to court. He lives in fucking Seattle, right? Talk about hedging a bet. I mean, I mean, he's like, I'm having a 24-hour shower. This is why he never got prosecuted for anything.

He murdered 90 people. It's raining again. He can't come in. You guys know the rules, sonny. You can get me. We shouldn't have agreed to this. It's been months. We found more bodies.

God, we got to pray for a son. So if the judge looked out the window and said, quote, today's a nice enough day for anyone to come to court. And then he issued a warrant for representative Marion as I unchecked. The warrant stated that he would have to accompany officers to court anytime he was not officially working in the legislature.

Uh-oh. Loophole. On April 22nd, Police Sergeant George Helmuth was ordered to go to Marion's congressional hearing to go to Marion's congressional office to bring him in. Hang on. Let's just back over this guy's name just for a second.

Helmuth. Helmuth. Not mouth. It should be mouth. Hang on. Well, it is. M-U-T-H. You know it is, though.

It had to have been. You know in some stage. You know how some people whose name is like Cockburn pronounced like Coburn? It's Cocksburn. They were definitely Helmouths. Helmuth. Helmuth.

It's Helmuth. It's not mouth. It's not mouth. It's not mouth. It's Muth. It's Muth. Muth. I'll say.

I ate a sausage from a picnic basket and I have Helmuth. I will not talk about it further. Ever. I'm done with parks. And blankets. I got Helmuth from eating out at Wilford Brimley. I'll see you later, buddy. I'll see you.

Lots of questions I want to ask, but I'm going to... It's quite a cocoon. So. Sergeant Helmuth. He finished. Butterflies flew out. So. But the thing about...

The thing about it was is he... You know the worst thing is I've realized now that you've brought him up twice. Wilford Brimley is a real person. You don't know him? Oh man. That's hilarious. Like the whole time. I was like, first time I was like, I want to get it, but everyone else did.

So I let it slide. But when it came up again, I'm like, there's a real guy called Wilford Brimley? Why is this dollop not about that guy? But you don't know anybody who has diabetes. Again. I don't know what you're talking about. I've been through this in your country so many times. It's like the bong smoking dog?

Is that what he's talking about? Yep. You don't know anybody who has diabetes? Is it Beedies? It's Beedies. And that's an insane question. Diabetes. But what does he say?

He says diabetes, right? Diabetes. Diabetes, that's right. Diabetes. That's right. He did a commercial. Who is he though? A PSA for...

I understand what he said about diabetes. He's from the movie... He's the guy who created it. I'm sorry for diabetes. I was in cocoon and I love oatmeal. Diabetes. That was my bad. And it's not called a gift, it's a GIF.

Yes, I've been 84 for 40 years. Yes. It saved when I found those cocoons. That was special. Was that a documentary? Oh, is he the one with the mustache? Yes. There we go.

Grandpa Walrus. Yeah. There is no doubt you could have put Wilford Brimley in like a Walrus air, like I did a zoo, and they'd be like, hmm, they would like take a minute, one point. Brim. Yeah. Good fish heads, fellow Walrus hands. Danny, you have diabetes.

Couldn't you see Brimley eating a fish without his hands? And zookeepers being like, I think he's the dominant one. Get back. Move, Spushing. All the females belong to Wilford. King Walrus. Just in the tank, just swimming. What is that Wilford?

Is he banging or what the fuck? What if Steve Gutenberg's here? Yeah, but I just cleaned up the trash. Eight bucks an hour of benefits, right? So, the thing about- Little Goot shrapnel. The thing about going to the office was the police officer from DC could not arrest a congressman on federal property.

Oh, whoa, so he's going to Julian Assange himself. Right, so he can't arrest him there. He had to wait until Marion left the capital grounds. That is amazing. But first he went to see him in the office, and they argued, and Marion was not into being arrested. And at the end of the argument, Marion yelled, I'll take you for a ride.

Apparently- Because Marion also drove an Uber. Five stars! Please, end of comment. So, God, the guy this morning driving to the airport, he took me to the delivery entrance. He invented an airport, right? He was so old, he had no idea it was happening,

and he finally got me to the airport like 20 minutes late, and I was just like, oh fucking dude, five stars, I feel so sorry for you. Which airline, Alamomor, hurts? Huh? Oh no. I had to do it this morning. I got left this morning to the airport,

and my dude has just launched in. It's early in the morning, and he just goes, oh, I really like Prince Harry. And he starts talking about Prince Harry. That is so great. But I don't get it. Five stars. I don't get it because it's early in the morning, right?

So, I'm just like, I just think this guy likes Prince Harry. And then he just starts bringing up other British stuff, and I'm like, fucking Trump's America. Fucking racist. Hey, hey. You know, bangers a mash, right? Bangers a mash, and I'm talking about your little tea in there. Cheerio, buddy.

Fucking Harry, man. He was great. Sorry about Prince's dahila. My heart goes out to you about that one, still friend. But Prince Harry's having quite the year. I like that new girlfriend. She's great. Do you know her? Do you know him?

Honestly, what he said he said he liked the new girlfriend. I like her. She's pretty good Yeah, a lot of your people don't cuz she's not white, but I don't think that's right But secretly I might Is she is she not white is that how oh yeah, no, holy fuck What happens then to England do they explode like yeah, there's been a re-enter the union. We need to figure this out again a Non-white is in the palace Poor Queen. Oh, you know, you know, yes Like she's not fucking crazy racist. Let's not pretend like the Queen isn't a crazy

Oh, by the way, I love out of all the shit tonight people like oh back off the If I said that like I'm still under that fucking yoke, but you fuckers left home. It's fine You change your name you burn the shit down Don't pretend like you give a shit about mom now that she's old Oh, you left you broke her fucking heart But guess who's swinging by for some money hey, mom I'm on heroin Been gone for a while. I've been making some bad choices. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got your email

Sorry, I'm like covered in skin pods Listen, I'll suck your picnic for five bucks First you must capture and bring back the brimley. He's protected by an army of war I I mean, I've got to be honest with you if I were a walrus trying to pass off as a human being Yeah, Walter does seem like the first name you would come up with You're like walrus Walter now, that's too close. Yeah, we'll feel fresh He looks around and he sees two name tags on employees will Fred Will Fred will Fred I was never a walrus. Yeah, why would you say that?

Wilfred come to bed Wilfred somewhere. There's a boy who woke up as a walrus. Yeah, I've switched places It's like a tusk a tusked half walrus boy. We wanted to kill it, but it's so I mean people love taking pictures of it I'm Wilrus brimley We should we should get back There is a story, okay, so he has to wait he can't arrest him on the cattle ground So he yells I'll take you for a ride apparently the meaning of this was that Marion was saying he would drive Helmeth home as a way to getting rid of him

That so that's how he's gonna get out of the office. He's gonna drive home so Helmeth It seems went along with this because he realized that once he started driving home They'd be off capital grounds and he'd get a rest up. Oh my god. No, this is so this is a quote from the Bend bulletin Here's the hilarious thing. Well, you already know about a Washington Congressman nothing in the Washington papers or it goes right in the shit out of this motherfucker. I'm so sorry That's actually my ringtone. I Was in Cleveland last week and one of the locals change it to the Indians

So it's not my very right. It's the new update. The new update. Yeah, no, I thought it was terrible Okay, that's mine Yeah, well the Bend bulletin newspaper He accompanied Helmeth outside where the two jumped into Zynchek's car and sped down the block at a high speed with Zynchek finally pulling up by the office building from which they'd started But so he's better. He's better on the block. He's better on the block But firstly, what a fucking baller again. I'm finding it hard not to like this guy Because isn't he like being in trouble for speeding and his solution to that is to take the guy out and do a fucking lap while

He's waiting, but also like while he's trying. He's like, oh, dude. I'm gonna get you for speeding. Oh god. Damn it. We're back on goal shit Do it again They both jumped out of the car and health myth Helmeth tried to arrest Marry him, but he resisted the two men fought As they fought Helmeth shouted I've got a gun But I don't want to take you out Marry responded you double-cross me by lying about a gun I think that I assume by that asked him he asked him before do you have a gun and the cop was like no

I don't have a gun. Why would I have a gun? I'm a cop and then yeah And then Helmeth yelled back I'm not gonna take a gun out as he kept jerking on Marion's arm to pull him away and Marion responded I told you I'd take you home if you wanted me to take your glasses off This is the way way. This is the time you're gonna get it He started jerking his arm. If you're one and then he said I told you I would take you home If you wanted me to and then he's like If you like rock by this I

think Take out your glasses do this gum lose the shirt Drink this pineapple juice kiss me right here. Yes. Kiss me. Kiss me. Oh my god. It's not weird if your eyes are shut Well, you do have a gun I'm gonna pour this There's a third guy wait the third. Hey, I'm here poured a jug of water over myself. No, no, no We're trying to fight fuck come on Washington, DC. Come on. Put your dick in my mouth At this point two capital police arrived and convinced Marion to go with the sergeant to the police substation in the

House of Representatives building there they kept arguing and screaming at each other Please people who are interested what was going on were barred from the station But from outside they could hear all the screaming followed by sounds of a scuffle. So now they're fighting Then they heard Marion yell you're a fucking liar Eventually Helmuth managed to get my lies come from a hell mouth Fuck you Eventually, how about guys there's no you in this I uh eventually Helmuth managed to get Marion to agree to go to court, but Marion yelled that he would sue Helmuth

In court finally they got him in court and he protested against the technical form of the ticket and Eventually the judge got tired of listening to him Yammer on and said she was taking a recess And then she went and played kickball in the yard When I'm ready to go back in Great recess When the judge said that Marion said I'm taking a recess to and put on his coat and hat and started walking out of court No, no, no, you don't take recesses Then the judge ordered that he be put in a cell and several policemen and bailiffs had to tackle him and restrain him

After a short scuffle Again From the cell He yelled that he's out of here. All right jail, whatever either way He yelled that he was invoking his congressional immunity So he could go back to work and quote represent my Seattle constituency So congressional immunity like they can speed in DC and be like I'm a fucking congressman and they they don't get tickets I like to think it's like they do it like lethal weapon to when they're all like congressional immunity

And then this story will end with that dude just going it's just been revoked Anyway, Mel Gibson is also Australian I apologize for that Anti-Semite yeah born in America Waited it out born in born in America technically born in yeah, but it looks like a genius now though Mel Gibson He's like I stuck around a built a church. You're in my world bitches People came around a male Disagree When

When Marion family calm down he was brought out of the cell back at a court where he told the judge he had been quote a little Disturbed and perhaps a trifle excited The judge sentenced him on two charges speeding a contempt of court his total punishment was a fine of $45 to the Supreme Court Which he refused to pay Legend of course he did so he's put back so much later for 45 So 25 was absurd. He was put back in his cell and then eventually his wife came down and paid it and he got out In May the couple decided to honeymoon in Puerto Rico They were gonna drive down to Miami and then fly from there. He was pulled over by the police twice on the way down

Yes for speeding so he just is he can't stop speeding can't stop speeding was there a bomb in the car He's always getting away from somebody Once he was detained in North Carolina while the whole town gathered around a gawk Sorry gawk gawk once they finally got to Puerto Rico. They started their honeymoon Marion borrowed a car from a banker in San Juan. No, that guy's like take it easy. Huh easy on it. It's fine He saw that he was gonna drive down to the seaside town and they were gonna go fishing He and Ruby drove down to a village where they found a fisherman with a boat grab some refreshments and then head it out The fishermen also enjoyed their refreshments and was soon too plowed to drive the boat

So Marion drove the boat back to the dock and pushed the fisherman into the borrowed car and By the way, bystanders said in record time. Yeah Wait when they put him in the car did he like throw him to her and she's like got it. Yeah, throw him in Fish market him. I get it for the audio I give them a good so They're headed back to San Juan, but they didn't make it as the drunk congressman crashed the car into an oncoming truck But no one was hurt The truck driver however was demanding a settlement for the damage on the spot

See you in court Marion countered that he didn't owe any money because he was a congressman. Wow So he thinks he's I'm a congressman watch this That's my wife Legal There's kind of Adelaide's someone just got he liked Oh Shit nine

Gotta get it in So he went to get back in his car and then the truck driver pulled the truck and blocked the whole road So and someone called the cops and then when when a cop arrived Marion again made the case that he was a congressman So this was fine and it worked the cop let him go So you can just do anything. Yeah, I'm a congress. So sorry we stopped you sir murder away When Marion got back to his hotel, he remembered the shit-faced fishermen was passed out on the floor in the backseat So they decided to take him home, but this time Ruby drove to their place. No, they're driving him back to that fishing village So, you know what the thing is if you're not gonna ate it you should throw back

Shocking he drank like a fish So when they got to his house Marion knocked on the gate and then he yelled he lives here. I'm gonna leave him Oh, what? And the guy came out of the house and said he had no idea who the fisherman was and he definitely did not live Live there, and then he slammed the door and Marion's face So Marion got behind the wheel of the car hit the gas and drove into the gate Well, he is in Congress Just totally destroying the gate. Yeah, but he's in Congress Then the owner ran inside and grabbed his pistol

And came out and challenged Marion to a duel Always good A drunk duel? Ah, she's the one in the middle Also just for the record Stories that involve cars and stories that involve jewels should not go together Like it feels like once you've got a car, jewels are out. Yeah, no duals at that point Sorry, they may say it differently. Yeah, it's alright. No, it's okay. You guys don't say that you that's in the middle like Helmuth Jewel, it's right there. Let's stop. These are the jewel he comes from a place

Sorry, don't use most of the letters and I'm sorry. They don't know. All right. All right guys. We're different. No, no What what he did you earlier we saw that you know, we were gonna ignore that I Don't say it I challenge you to a drool I had ten prices Really good really good really good really nice Lot came out of you. That was awesome. Ah so So he's having this standoff, right? Yeah at this point quote a

A crowd of cane cutters arrived waving their machetes shouting long live the Puerto Rican Republic Good Good, I'm at Congress. Oh Boy So now Marion and Ruby were freaked out and they jumped in the car and drove back to San Juan just leaving the fisherman there But but they ran out of gas before they got back Shout in the gas tank. I'm a Congress

fill up I'm a Congress Happy New Year I'm a congress beautiful sink now Marion had no money on him Of course, but he went to a gas station and mentioned the name of the owner of the car Oh, and the gas station just gave him the gas to go back to the hotel. Who is this guy? He is When I say stuff, it's like what is it? Yeah, I mean my words are magic words

I think you forgot the part in this story where he found a genie in a bottle and Anything he wants he gets that might change So So he goes back to the hotel and he but he's still upset about what happened chanting of the Puerto Rican our country, whatever and about one a.m. He called the US Naval Station good And and told the Colonel who is in command of a squadron of Marine Corps airplanes that his life was in danger

And he would demanded a platoon come and guard it. Oh The Colonel refused and I mentioned I'm a Congress Please hurry And then a lieutenant refused but the two officers were alarmed enough to try to call the governor of Puerto Rico to discuss What was going on, but the governor's secretary would not wake him up So at some point the decision was made to send six Marines to check on the congressman and see if he needed security. Oh He does all the time The Marines arrived to find a very drunk and not in need of any aid

Marion Marion Zion check One of the Marines said quote. He is all right if you can understand him Okay, here's my question is Has he been continuing to drink because from the last time we've heard him drink he's driven There's been a whole bunch of things and he's still fucking blind drunk or is he being like topping it up? He's real. He's really nice. I think he's talking. Yeah, he just has an empty glass and he's like Congress and it's full No, but Marion is still concerned about the threat against his life. So so here's a gate and came at me the gate Fluid me gate hit me and then there's a fisherman. Oh, you gotta be this guy

You look the phone So Marion Marion called the governor at 7 a.m. But he could not get him on the phone But then the governor's office apparently called the hotel because hotel a manage management explained to the governor's office to quote pay no attention to it and That the congressman had not ever covered from his fishing trip the day before and currently he was drinking milk out of coconuts and throwing the Empty shells from his hotel window at people walking by I am in love I am in love Oh, I'm part of Cocoa Congress

So guys from Congress Drunk monkey, what the fuck is that? I just hope he wasn't throwing to it at the same time because people would be like, oh my god It's a horse Pegasus What an amazing thing that's when you take someone off speakerphone, I'm sorry, what did you say he's drinking milk out of coconuts? What is he doing? Yes, he's unavailable right now. He's throwing coconut. He's in a hotel room and he's drawn a face on a volleyball and he's Uh-huh putting Malibu in the coconut. Okay

I'm sorry. I killed you I love you By mid-morning the congressman and Ruby had vanished He and Ruby next popped up on st. Thomas Hang on. What is that? Oh, it's another eye. Get off of me. Oh It's an island in the brilliant I was like this Bible has taken a twist Good lord, I'm a saint

I Don't worry. I'm a congress Would say Peter I know I said I'm from Congress Marion caught a very large fish on st. Thomas and wanted stuff So he could bring it back to his congressional office and mount it for his colleagues and constituents to see So he called a local taxidermist the evening Harold Had a reporter there and he said quote This is Marion quoting boy. Am I happy? G. Am I happy? Let's celebrate

He said great quote he invited a few people to his room That's where he revealed that he'd come up with a new cocktail. Oh Oh, no. Oh No, quote He seized a bottle of rum emptied a generous portion into a shaker and then added a liberal amount of hair tonic. You Guys want a rum in here? I call it the befuddled What I love that somebody yelled out cool back Yeah

official comedy fan certified That is amazing. Oh, that's a lot of yelling after technical comedy turns Set up Rule of three A delightful drink he told his guests and then served them the taxidermist and the others sip the cocktail cautiously Yeah, as he watched and then gulped Ah Marion said the drink was quote something new and the guests all nodded Nobody's arguing with that. No, it is very new very bad to also not good and

Back in Washington Congress passed and Roosevelt signed legislation directly aimed at Marion Zein check Wow It gave commissioners in the district the power to suspend Congress members driver's licenses Even if they were issued by another state, oh my god, and the car had congressional tags Congressional immunity no moss. It's just been revoked I thought I stepped on that one. Well, that's gonna probably affect me greatly This was done because Marion had sped through a man throw fair on the Capitol and then gone bug fuck afterwards People in his home state were also getting tired of the insane actions of Marion the Democratic Party Executive Committee of Kitsap County

Passed a resolution to kick Marion out of the party. They officially declared him a disgrace But wasn't he like I'm in Congress can't do that The reason you can't kick me out is because I'm in here Think about it Reports then came from st. Thomas about Marion's behavior. They stood on me Call that where the fuck are you on this one? What the fuck don't encourage it starting courage I That was a call back call back

So Marion was being driven by the governor's chauffeur when he apparently decided he wanted to take control of the car The chauffeur was not keen on the idea of letting a guy take over while he was driving Come on, but Marion insisted and Then he showed him how insistent he was by biting the chauffeur on the hand This guy had his own version of the sacred It was also reported that he lapped up soup from a plate while at a diner what the whole the beginning soup on a plate is crazy Who is like it's worse enjoy. Yeah, no spoon like

It'd be great if it was revealed this was the guy who decided to put soup in a bowl Like up until that point time people like we love soup, but what if there was a plate? With a big bottom Oh Charles, yeah, you're talking about a cup stupid I'm talking about a Cup fucked a plate I'll call it a plop He

Also stole a car from a street sure from a stream. That's my car. I'm a road Oh, yeah, I mean it's like the same thing like what a cop flashes as bad. I need that. He's just like I was in Congress Oh, I'll put you out of there. I need your car. I need hair tonic Yes, I've been drinking rum and hair fluid now. Let me in the genie in have you seen Saint Thomas I was sitting on his face and he got away from me Didn't find that part Finally the couple's honeymoon wrapped up and the two love This is still the honeymoon

Well, we did everything we wanted to Parasailings the only thing we missed So they had it on we murdered that fisherman run. Yeah, we did everything They headed on by boat Just for the record, I want to see this story from her parents She's 21. She's gone to the city. Yeah to get this fucking job. Yeah, and then five weeks later What does he do well, he does anything He's in Congress

I think he's Batman His words make people do things What do you like about him not much but he said he was in Congress and I had no choice We killed a fisherman And again So while he was on the ship he Had a bicycle that he had bought. No, what already weird on Saint Thomas That he put Ruby on the handlebars and wrote around the deck telling people this is how he was gonna get back to Washington State

If the cops didn't leave him alone Hey, I mean he was gonna ride his bike or ride his bike on a boat back Hopefully it's that one. I can't really clarify God if you're on the boat, you're like good good glad we caught this one Now he's also become the hottest thing in news. So every publisher wants a story about this guy and what he's doing So it's almost it's almost like the news made you don't care about the qualifications of the candidate and just want to pay To look at the most cliques words. That's so weird. That's so weird. That's interesting. Well, that's an interesting way Crazy time. Yeah, thank God. We live in a different time now

We're not falling for that again So when he lands in New York, there's just tons of reporters Following him. Why are you such a dipshit? Why are you such a dipshit? He's done it again But when he when he he also learned when he got back that his landlady had evicted them from their apartment in Washington DC she said Marion and Ruby were too hard on the furniture and China My China the country or the not the wrestler, but They just didn't really love for you my wrestling

Get a real job let's jump on the couch When I eat when I eat from plates, I eat fucking hard Well done smash Next So while they were in St. Thomas the landlady removed Marion and Ruby's clothes. So it was like a you know, there was Sure, they furnished a furnished apartment. Yeah, I just kind of took this shit. I thought you meant as punishment No, she's put it out. She put it in boxes or whatever or she burned it. I don't know what happened Okay, I made that part up when he arrived when he arrived in New York

Marion announced that he created a new cocktail that he had named the Zion check zippers We'll be having those at Earl's right after it was not hair tonic. Oh good This one was made of rye honey cracked ice and a sprig of mint Delicious, yeah on the morning in the 26 Marion was said to have sat on the edge of his bed in his New York hotel room from 10 a.m. Did 2 p.m. Staring at bottles of scotch rye rum and gin After the four hours were up he announced scotch and sodas my favorite drink This guy is the greatest

Except I like Ryan soda better Wait Reporters in his wife Revelation Hey guys, I like when but Andrew Rachel is my favorite I the quote is So So then I want my two favorite drinks to find in my mouth

You mean moth So Marion then started pounding scotch and so did ruby after a while they started drinking zine check zippers And soon they were at Rockefeller Center in the pool shoes and socks off waiting around in the water as the press took pictures And and wrote up stories The papers announced the congressman was back in Washington on May 26 He spent the night in the apartment. He had been evicted from and was in his office at 10 a.m. With a new agenda He said he was starting a campaign to convert congress to the zine check zipper Wait

He is still in congress. Yep Hey, so but but what's his policy? He's gonna study. He's gonna convert congress to the new drink that he's made Hey, but what so he's just gonna get the water drink the that's his platform It's got a new agenda the zine check zipper is to get all these asses all the way to number one with my policy of ZZ top That's it It's gonna get everybody drinking the one drink He invited reporters in and explained. I mean, this is insane From the daily capital journal

Okay, quote It's really very easy to make you take a few sprigs of mint and crush them in the glass Be careful to spiral them to the bottom of the glass Then you add the honey be sure to spiral that too Finally, you add about three times as much rye whiskey as there is liquid in the glass. Oh my god wait That's like Wow

I mean again, I haven't quite got to the bit where this guy's story's gone wrong yet. This guy's life is a montage of fun right Like when he came back they were like here we go. He's like, oh, I want us to pass the drink Okay, we're going to china with this She can't wrestle cocktails I found a cocktail that'll make peace He was also upset about reporters coverage of the zion check zipper in new york quote They said it was only equal parts honey and rye. Why would I make that kind of sissy drink?

Sissy drink I'm gonna make america drunk again Zionist zipper what is zion check not zion check zion check I'm sorry. There's a little bit of ist in that zion check come on guys, you know the jews run cocktails Want to admit julep Trump, okay, we're in the locker room We're amping peas peas purses

Oh, that's when you grab two at once. Yeah with one hand. Yeah I broke my hand I broke my hand I over grabbed That's an og over grab I mean, I feel like like if you grab two at the same time that's got to be consensual Absolutely because no not two people aren't going to stand that close to each other unless it's a consensual like like one That's sexual assault, but two together like everyone's agreed on how you both stand there so I can get my hand And that's whenever I remember the sami's twins

I think they're called conjoined twins. That's really offensive what you've just said I was talking about cats Oh, they're sami's cats. Okay. All right. That's fine. That's fine. You're allowed to call them sami's cats still Chinese whisper that's a callback That's a callback. Why is that woman heckling that guy for his callback? That's an international callback um, so um now Things are about to uh get rocky in his five week marriage and six week relationship

It really like when you the fact that it has been five weeks is crazy They were talking two years. No, they seem so in love. They pack it in. Yeah It started with the woman. Uh, they were subletting The new apartment from uh on the last friday in may she tried to take the apartment back But ruby and maryon pushed her out She said she said she kept trying to enter but was ejected five or six times maryon then called reporters and told them what was going on And asked them to come by so they could fix them up some zine check zippers

Is there any kind of plan as far as what his life is? Or he's just like I invented a drink and don't need to pay red congress hashtag congress When the reporters arrived and he started making them drinks Ruby had had it and walked out and discussed. She took off in their car A few hours later police were called by a tenant of the building who said quote. He's throwing things again Says it all says it all. It was a bad time for coconuts

A crowd gathered on the street as maryon threw furniture and clothing out a window Police arrived and tried out a man Police arrived and tried to stop him but maryon fought them off Finally being brought down by a billy club strike to the head Oh shit just got real apparently drinking's not all that fun now is He was dragged to the patrol car wearing just a pair of pants It was the australian Oh my my I was just making some uh

My I've got congressional immunity. My I was just making me zine check zippers and all my come on This is mine So they took him to jail where he remained until saturday night when his secretary posted the 25 bond The supreme court was like stop finding him We have vacation days. We're sacrificing won't stop The memon by the way like everyone around him always has money, but he has never any money never 21 Oh, I got a hundred. You know what I'm in congress. Can I get you back later?

That's my wallet in congress boy. Did I mention I'm in congress These are not the droids you're looking for I'm in congress So, uh, the woman subletting the apartment was in the hospital sub from a broken hip Uh, she'd gotten when he hurt him and ruby had pushed her out the door Oh, hang on what? Yeah, she broke her hip when they were fucking tossed her out Uh, she got real. This was the night she got real. This this is

Yeah, this is the part where if I said if I I would turn to you go shit just got real Mary went back to the apartment and reporters arrived pretty soon after because they had received a tip that ruby was coming back They wanted to be there to cover the scene, but she did not return quote Zine check tossed off a couple of zine check zippers and ran from the building Sorry, wait one more time. What he just drank two and ran. Yeah. Oh, I got the zipper juice I'm going 70 again As he did he grabbed a reporter by the arm and they jumped into another car and took off the reporter said maryon drove through quote At least five red lights jumping over curbs and down sidewalks and narrowly missing a number of pedestrians

I'm in congress He was he was in the congressmobile. All right Literally every moment of this deserves like the bat sign like coming in and out. Da-da-da-da-da-da congress So He drove all of her town Like a madman crashing the car into friends houses as he searched houses as he searched for ruby like he would stick his head in their windows and yell have you seen my wife? And the weirdest thing about it was it was wifey for a bull rat, but he kept going my wife

Ah And even then they were like enough It is He forced his way past hotel employees and tried to search every room of hotel Hold on. Sorry real quick. He is crashing into his friends houses. Yeah. Well, how is he gonna stop the car? so much Well, you guys didn't have a gate One her time a drink a drove through your mailbox. So the Zion checkers in the mail

No, don't be enjoy it get involved With the fact that like I think those are words five beers in that I can still make a pun like that You are in congress I'm in congress and it's possible. So Just gin and basil My mom was to actually be like that was the right way you stood strong It is basil and courgette

He went back to his apartment and had some more Zion check zippers and yelled and yelled They can't do this to me and then ran back out I Mean they feel like a drink that will give you confidence. It truly feels like he is twitter Like he's only moments He's digestible fragments. You see a photo of him and he's just a blue egg That's why you crash into houses, uh, he drove to the white house to try to get rosavel to help him to find ruby Now this is when you could just drive up and get out of your car and go in

I don't feel like there was ever a time he's like i'm in congress that that was still allowed this recently Yeah, because well, but he's in congress. So he could just go into the i'm in congress and go inside Still it's insane when when we could just well now Now if half the guy's in congress came up, you'd have to shoot him But um So he goes into the executive offices and he's carrying a briefcase Full of empty beer bottles and a ping pong ball. That is that is

Without question the best thing to ever have in a briefcase ever Without question like Oh a gentleman. I think this was sweet in the pot. Oh My god, there was gold. I I have got so many questions Firstly, were the beer bottles full in the first place and they're now empty I'm sure he just got empty beer bottles and put them in there. I hope so, but I think he drank them all And I assume there's already a ping pong ball in there I mean empty beer bottles and a ping pong ball is decoration for most cool bars in this town. So

Like if you're like white house security, can we search it? Yeah, you are Fine to actually don't go in actually the more I think about it. No, that is a weapon technically Your mind is a weapon. I feel There's technically nothing in there that would kill people but the fact that you've got that It's the ping pong ball. I'm very worried about the ping pong ball I Put in your vagina and I get out shoot it across the room get out He wanted roosevelt to call out the army with machine guns to bombard the hotel where he thought ruby was hiding

Aim high negotiate down, but roosevelt would not come out to see him So marion ran back to his car pulled out with tires screeching and yelled that he would be back He went straight to the district attorney Leslie Garnett's office and tried to get him to arrest vice president garner But yeah, go ahead he charged the VP with quote being in on the campaign to keep ruby hidden Does he think she's an actual ruby At this point he's spent to a police station and tried to get his landlady arrested saying he's drunk, right? He's drunk. Yeah, always. I feel like he's always drunk. I have been drinking hunter as thompson

I get the impression that since he invented his cocktail. Yeah, he has not been sober since Like since the moment he was absolutely the case. Yeah, for sure So he goes to police station and tries to try to try to get his landlady arrested saying she stole his watch My Laili land is a bitch Boom congress Smoke bomb congress So he gets back in his car and then he smashes as he turns around he smashes into cars on both sides I love how he draws and then announced he's making a w turn and then announced

He was going to get a job with the FBI quote then I'll find her After that he went back to the White House well I'm a congressman the FBI is hard, huh? He was once again told that FDR was not available at that point The police chief issued a warrant for his arrest saying quote This man is apparently wild and there's only one thing left for me to do and that's arrest him. That was an option It felt optionless at this point. They're like, huh came back to the White House. That's two you're out

We just realized he's immortal all the other shit. We must put him in space prison I feel like FDR gave him one shot. FDR was like, look, I'm sleeping Don't fucking answer this call. I'm just gonna keep sleeping. I'm the fucking president and then he came back a second time He's like fucking arrest him. Wrap it up. Yeah, wrap it up. We already made that law against him. Get him out of here He's legless if the Osgoe shoot to do it. So they sent a squad of cops out to find him Word came that Marion was at the naval medical center But no one knew what he was doing drinking IVs I'm a fan of the cocktail

So they but they had him and they arrested him on a lunacy warrant and took his seat There's the movie title Zach Efron The lunacy warrant Octavia Spencer The lunacy warrant. It's like cocktail meets in the line of fire Made by Marvel Uh

The warrant said he had been driving his car in a reckless manner and a Annoying citizens and public officials. Yes, absolutely guilty. Super guilty and totally annoying I was put in a room in the insane ward, which was for people likely to become violent When he had been arrested the only thing he had in his pocket was a billiard ball Now in my defense, I could have put it in the briefcase because of the beer bottles in the pickpocket You know what you want to get a billiard ball in the pocket and it was in my fucking pocket. So I called it That's a that's a scratch. It's a joke. I'm here. It's a joke. I make whenever you find the ball in my pocket

I go that's a scratch You want to know where the white ball goes to? Congress Marion was held Marion was held at Gallinger Hospital and evaluated by Dr. Joseph Gilbert over a period of time Two weeks later hospital officials were meeting to discuss what to do with Marion when he gave his guards the slip Poked his head out a ground floor window and casually spoke to reporters who stood in a rotundra He is Julian Assange I mean this motherfucker can sniff out a reporter. Oh

His cat was nearby in a tie No one gets that but us. Did you not see Julian Assange's cat in a fucking tie and I know how to let him go Let him go his cat's in a fucking tie. Let him go He won. He won. The cat looks like a business cat tie leave him Caller tie cat Let the guy go His cat does kitty leaks the whole time

The whole time Marion spoke to reporters. He was dressed in white pajamas He explained that he had agreed to go to shepherd and enok pratt sanitarium in baltimore where congressional congressional leaders wanted him to go But he quote changed my mind when I found out they intended to send four burly guards with me I don't intend to be trump trundled about the country by guards Trundled? Trundled. Go ahead. I'm befuddled At that point he presented a list of demands to dr. Gilbert One that he believed that he'd be released outright Two that he'd be sent to st. Elizabeth's hospital for further examination and treatment

Three that he'd be tried by a lunacy jury We find the defendant Jury, I actually can't read this Ah, we find the defendant And we sentence him to Oh, this is the story of 12 batshit men, right? So these demands caused some issues with the hospital as dr. Gilbert did not want Him going anywhere without medical attendance accompanying him

Marion then told reporters that he quote suspected that the white house was mixed up in this idea of sending me around the country with four big guards If that's true, then this country is worse than Russia. Uh, hey, that's unfair Russia is now your ally apparently Rumi's The decision was made to transfer Marion to the hospital in Baltimore. He was taken in an ambulance bound in a straight jacket As he was taken out he shouted to reporters that he was being kidnapped 10 days later, he was in his new hospital's exercise yard when he just ran and climbed over the fence and Well, they shouldn't let him exercise so much

He's getting stronger Quote within he just told the fence he was in congress and it melted Quote with an agility that surprised the hospital attendants. Oh, he's shed. He's like a deer Look at him go, huh? Holy boy. That's something I did not expect that He hopped right over it. Yeah, we should get a like a taller than four-foot fence though. I think that's not the issue That's not the issue. He's so quick. He's like a Zion chick zipper Uh, he was gone before anyone could see which way he went Uh, how the next day which way did he go? A female janitor entered his congressional office and found Marion sleeping in a chair

He he left up and screamed get out Then he barricaded the door with all the furniture in the office And began a standoff that lasted 18 hours. Dave, this is This is unbelievable even for this I mean, what are you what it's fucking Seattle Seattle ground imagine him like with today's news cycle Ah We'll talk about that at the end. I don't think I don't think this would happen

They came to an agreement that the local police would not arrest Marion and he would be allowed to go Uh, so so the sergeant of arms came down right this guy, uh, Kenneth Romney and they talked and they came up with the solution They came to an agreement that local police would not arrest Marion and he would be allowed to go back to Seattle to get some rest Romney bought Marion a ticket on the midnight train headed heading to Chicago. I want to drive it With my mind boom my train started me I just sleep. Is it congress train? Maryland police still tried to arrest Marion as a fugitive from justice as he headed for the train But they were held off by the capital police

DC police then also tried to arrest him for assault on his landlady But they were also held off. So basically the deast the capital police are now squaring off with the Two locus local police departments to keep them from arresting crazy mad crazy pants Uh Romney threatened to call out all 150 capital police to keep the dc police from arresting him All the while reporters and photographers surrounded them and watched Finally the dc police agreed to accept $25 bail instead which Look you broke a lady's hip. What do you got? What do you got?

You got like 30 you got 30 35 bucks. They're 50 bucks What do you got 25 is a number that i'm more comfortable with I Can we go can we do 30 I can't see myself going above 25 If you knew my track record like i'm bananas You're lucky i'm even talking to you I'm in congress sort of oh, I did not know you were in congress. Well now i'm in saying in congress, but yeah

I jumped a fence Two-foot fence. It was a step. Will you accept beer bottles? Yes We accept beer bottles. Also, I have the nine ball Not too sweet in the pot too much Uh, so they agreed to 25 dollars which romney paid What? Who else was gonna pay it? I mean he was running around in pajamas a half hour ago Yeah, my wallet's in my other crazy suit

Capitol police then took him uh to a home and let him shower and gave him a new suit and took him to the train What? And then they took him to the train. Yeah, yeah as he walked to the station gates surrounded by press He was smoking a cigar And mary and zein check turned around and shouted i'll be back. All right I'm the train mary was put into a drawing room with a capital policeman who happened to be from seattle The policeman said he was just taking a vacation and keeping mary in company Romney told reporters that mary was saying quote. I said to him

I said to him i'm a dance damn site crazier than you and he agreed That is yep can't argue with that. Yeah Um other police Were put on each end of the car as he that he was on and instructed Not to allow anyone who did not have a reservation in that car on Mary and mary never left the drawing room until he reached chicago there the chicago police helped him stay Secluded as arrangers were made to get him on a plane to seattle He was then put on a plane but instead of going on the runway it taxied over to a hangar and mary was told to get out

The airline officials didn't want him traveling without someone watching him And a policeman's uh, and the policeman's trip was only paid for to chicago. So he was put back on a train headed for seattle His wife met him along the journey after she'd She had escaped from dc as she was also wanted for assault. Wait Really? Yes. She helped break the lady's hip So she's like i'm sorry fdr buried me I love you, baby Uh from the corvallis gazette times in montana july 2nd 1936

Representative mary and zion check sped homeward by train today distributing recipes for zion check zippers On a train i mean, you know what? No better place to fucking drink a lovely cocktail than on a train. Do you mean you've got a long journey? He's like this is how you enjoy yourself on this train To yourself a zionist zipper. Like yeah, like the guy in the beverage cart was like here we go again Yeah, I know how to make one. Oh my god. It's just mitten rum It's not easy man rum But do you mean he's on the train? He's telling people how to make i think he's actually handing out

In pieces of paper recipes recipes recipes. He wants to be big. Hey get drunk. Hey get shit face with this So i'm running for a bar. Come on Have a zipper Vote for me for bar vote for me for drunk. I want to hear 1940 trigger. Let me represent you in blackouts. Come on You love zippers. Come on. Uh one passenger on the train Another zipper one one passenger on the train was quoted There's been talk about zion check zippers and silly questions about booby hatch until i'm about ready to give myself one Did you say booby hatch? I have no idea what that quote meant, but i put it in

But you have enough zionized zippers and you're just like i'm on my booby puns I got is booby booby hatched. I'll be i'll read it to you again There's been talk about zion check zippers and silly questions about booby hatch until i'm ready to give myself one I mean the only hatch the only hatch i know is that one from lost, you know when they found the hatch That's the only and then you went down to it So i imagine it's like some bra that you just can just open up. We're in like We've decoded the bra

We're entering the booby hatch Be careful another Another passenger in the smoking car said he tried the zion check zipper and that it was good Yeah, you can quote me. Marion promised it's very basic May I promised a political comeback despite indications his reception in seattle would be anything but good Quote i'm going home to prove i'm not down and out the boys poured it to me Sorry, the boys poured it on me pretty heavy sending me to a mental hospital and i'll an attempt to whip me politically But i'm going to give them a campaign that will leave blisters where they sit down

So he's he's ready to go. He's ready to fucking hurt some asses He's gonna blister bottoms democratic leaders in seattle were said to be hoping he would go anywhere else in the country But washington state And But seattle it was when he arrived marion changed his tune and said he decided not to run for re-election because his mother was ill But then he went and visited his mother And she had one thing to ask That he run for congress again

No My day wishes to keep the party going She was about to die, but he gave her a couple of zion check zippers and she fucking perked right up I am at congress. She's alive Well He thought about what he was tell his constituents about everything that had happened But had not yet settled on anything yolo quote Solo solo quote whatever it is. It'll be good

That's not good from him He insisted he was saying and then his confinement was due to persecution by unnamed persons in seattle on august 4th He addressed a paying audience of more than 1,000 on the topic who is crazy Now firstly do you feel bad that he outsold you guys? And this is like this is a while ago with inflation Talking 20,000 Jesus. Are you ready to see if I'm fucking crazy? Welcome to the bad shit concert The odd he gave a speech and then the audience is allowed to ask him questions even after all this someone during it was like call back

Even after everything he'd done. He was still very popular On august 7th, he visited a seattle psychiatrist turns out marion had been seeing him since he returned to seattle The psychiatrist warned marion to stay out of the public eye and to keep quiet After the appointment the doctor told marion's brother-in-law quote you had better keep an eye on him Later that day marion went to his office on the 5th floor of the arctic building in seattle. Is that still there? It was a new office that he just rented for his reelection bid his brother-in-law And ruby waited for him in the car. It was clearly taking a long long time So his brother went up uh, brother-in-law went up to see him his brother-in-law quote

Marron was writing a note his face was flashed and he appeared excited. I became suspicious I told him his wife was outside the building waiting for him in the car. I suggested he get his hat and coat and leave with me He mumbled then he jumped from his chair Dashed to the other room in his office and jumped through an open window Dude, I knew he was gonna birdman The second you were saying that that's not birdmaning Birdman flew there was a flight. Well, how high up was it real? I mean, that's a question we all ask ourselves about What did it mean?

You know what? It means different things to different people. It really does But it's good to have that debate He landed in front of the car hitting his head on the curb dying instantly What the fuck is serious? Yeah, five stories. Oh my god, by the way when he landed Just crazy birds flew out of his head and zine check zippers. Yeah, fuck zine. It's been set on the way down zine check Zimba I like the thing he said zine check yourself before you wreck yourself What we call a mic flop

Uh The best part of a mic drop Ruby got out of the car screamed and fainted It would be revealed on the way down. He was like, yeah, man, Congress concrete It would be so it would be revealed the psychiatrist at the Baltimore hospital had stated Marion had manic depression And unless treated he would become increasingly ill. It was also believed this manic episode was set off because he was isolated by In congress by those who are against his radical progressive ideas the rich guys

Who were not in favor of the poor and labor Zine check was born in Seattle with a public ceremony more than 2,000 people attended his funeral at the senator auditorium in downtown Seattle with another 1,000 waiting outside Both the university of washington and bowing closed down for half a day in his honor He entered the university of ruby entered the university of washington and told the reporter. Let me forget and let me be forgotten She dropped out soon after and moved to hollywood to pursue acting Wait, what? Ruby pursued acting

In uh in august she shot at a prowler from her apartment building In 1938 she was ordered to pay $1,800 to the landlady in dc The note marion zion check was writing when he killed himself Quote it was my purpose in life to improve an unfair economic system which held no hope and left not even a chance to have Oh, wow, what you are that is insane Dude, he sopranoed you with the ending deal with it So here's the deal so so he had a mental illness. Did he? Yes I heard the first I've heard of them, but he was a lot of respect. I feel so bad about making so many jokes

I know, but here's the thing the whole country is making jokes. We were doing what they were doing because number one Obviously mental health wasn't the same as it is now But also we had he had a fucking free card Well, but we were talking about the congressional free card to do whatever you want We were talking about this earlier though as far as like a mental disorder. What is better? Like you were talking about this wouldn't you rather?

Jit like where did that come from? What were we talking about? We were doing one of those 10-minute dollops about The dude who called himself the emperor. Oh the so the emperor norton people have asked me to do the emperor norton So I'm just going I have it because it's way because he's a close friend of Dave's But I think this one makes a point about like government and what What a person can get away with or hide their problems ember norton's just a crazy guy that's walking around a city And everyone's like you're nuts and to me that's not that's not like funny because it doesn't make a point It's just like there's a guy walking around nuts, but this is has so many layers to it But again, it's like wouldn't you like there's yeah, that's like you know the whole

That's your dream the whole city of San Francisco pretended like the emperor norton thought he was the emperor san Francisco And they all went along with it. So it was a guy who was a schizophrenic guy It was like everyone was like we'll play along and he was like I'm happy as shit Right instead now we're like take these pills and drool in a wheelchair Right. Yeah You're welcome Oh, so I love how this show has ended with an explanation of what it was Can you imagine how shit movies would be if at like at the end of the second avengers everyone's like

We're not really getting along that well at the moment I guess this is like what really a story about the idea of how difficult it is to get I think we're all in Thor's head I didn't see it I Well, everyone got so sad. I mean, uh, it's happened a long time ago. You guys it's like being upset It wasn't being upset that easy die. We all know what fucking happened. Hi Yeah, he wrapped his way to death seriously though when I was watching that movie with my wife my wife goes. Oh my god He doesn't die does he?

And I looked at her and I said you're the widest person on earth Oh, that is amazing. Oh my god from a sore throat baby sit down. Hi His name's easy The rapper who didn't rap it It is too soon It's too soon. No, that's not too soon. That's a great fucking joke And you do you don't back down from that just because they fucking back the way from it Don't you trust that fucking joke? Oh my god. I'm becoming that fucking guy. You're fucking right. I'm a congressman

No, well, well, well, well, well I'm a congressman. Well, uh, that's the end of the dollop We truly thank you guys so much. It is amazing. You're fantastic Maybe no more Uh, we love the neptune theater. We love coming here. We'll come back. You guys are seriously fucking awesome. Give us your water We're here for your water Uh, we so we have this policy on this podcast. Yeah, get out, sir We have this policy on this podcast that we will sign cars and it's becoming an insane thing. Um, and so what we'll do

So what we'll do is if anyone legitimately wants their car signed and like 45 minutes, where is it? The deca hotel, so it's raining outside. So we've had this before where if it's raining, you can fucking I love how you're like It's raining outside to a crowd of people from seattle Sound like it raining outside. Of course it's fucking raining outside. It's outside outside. Do you finish your LA gigs by going? It's a desert outside. I don't think you fucking do it. It's 88 in december. Thank you So it's raining outside and uh But there's at the deca hotel right at a kitty corner from here. There's in the back. There's a little like cover And so we can stand in there and you guys can drive your car and if you wipe it off and then sign it

And um, yeah, I can't sign in the rain Yeah, if you want to get a picture or whatever, you know, we'll hang out for a minute We'll get some pictures and all that stuff. I'm not taking a picture. No Dave believes they steal your soul Um, but truly you guys thank you so much. If you want any of that stuff hang around for a minute We appreciate it so much guys. Thank you. And thank you to will