The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 23 - The Willie Dee

Episode Date: September 28, 2014

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the hard times of the USS Wiliam Porter.Tour Dates Dollop MerchSourcesPatreon

When you're staying at an Airbnb you might be like me wondering could my place be an Airbnb and if it could what could it earn? You could be sitting on an Airbnb and not even know it. That in-law sweet guest house where your parents stay only part-time Airbnb it and make some money the rest of the year whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for something a little more fun. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host I welcome to the bucket I mean that camp that's the new that's the new one that's a new what it's the new song no

there's none of these are songs then they never come to fruition there's nothing that there's already an intro and sometimes you sing it and most times you don't it doesn't it doesn't make any sense inviting it's not inviting it's friendly it's off-putting it's lovely it's awful I'm Dave Anthony I'm here with Gary Reynolds we are doing a podcast called the dollop if you're a first-time listener you should go back and listen to the other ones yeah wait no I'm kidding do me a favor go to another one because this is gonna be brutal we get a lot of them we do get a lot of people recommending them yeah I

see some of them are really great some of them are too like hey man this is a big like this truck and a thing yeah sometimes it's just like a like one story yeah that's not an hour yeah and then there's one thing I have to tell people I'm not I'm not gonna do anything about serial killers because people always say me hey what about the baby killer of France I'm like I don't want to talk about the baby killer Ferguson was hard enough to hilarious you know what's funny baby death like like so there'll be no there'll be no anything about serial killers or you know fucking rapists or anything like it's gonna be it's not funny it's not

funny yeah but I do understand why people think it's interesting for sure like there are some interesting serial killer stories but it's not once you get that idea that people are actually being murdered it's yeah yeah it takes a little fun out of it for the most part we won't talk about politics unless there's a crazy crazy story I might do one about that there's some there's some Mississippi election I think you've heard about it but it's fucking insane oh boy what's been happening I'm sure it's all good and so but in so unless it's a rare occasion we'll probably avoid politics right yeah I mean yeah I

am like some stuff dips its toe in the pool anyway but yeah yeah directly yeah yeah but I love the I love that you guys are sending in suggestions it's that's very helpful I've definitely gotten a few that I will be doing out of those so appreciate it this is one of those already so this is probably the baby killer this is about a this is about a who we murdering today on the podcast it's not a man who killed 19,000 babies let's dip into it finally we had like a morning zoo noise yeah the USS William D Porter was a Fletcher class destroyer in the US Navy Navy not the Navy no the name is

harder it's so different yeah named after Commodore William D Porter I would have guessed that William Porter served during the U.S. Civil War and once steered his ship to safety even though he was blind and severely burned by a pierced boiler whoa whoa whoa yeah that's a fucking hero right I mean steered a ship blindly while on well he was blinded so the boiler blew up and like burned him and and as he couldn't see but he still steered his ship very crazy thing to be able to do well I don't think you can do it but someone must have been like okay turn left oh yeah hey what do you let me take over

now they're gonna name a ship after me my boat my boat right right right right right hard right harder right I don't know where I have my eyes it's an important point because I think it relates the story of William Porter very much relates to the the ship the way things go with the ship well might let you okay blind is a perfect oh boy the ship was known by the as the willy D by the crew little nickname love it man the D hey where you going going back to the willy D yeah yeah girl like yeah it was one of hundreds of destroyers the U.S. built in a hurry during World War two that's they're like we got yeah we got

to get we had some ships together that's fast fast ships it was put into service in July 1943 with a crew of 125 men now because it was World War two obviously a lot of a lot of people were shipping out and going off and fighting yep two fronts right yep and then you've got all the Navy ships so there weren't a lot of experienced men to go around sure right because it's not like we had building they were building the ships fast they were making the troops fast if we're building a hundred ships that doesn't mean we had hundreds of experienced guys hanging out no I don't think we still crack that nut no it's

attitude first yeah I don't think yeah so there 125 men on the ship on the willy D on the willy D and aside from a few experienced hands most were in high school or working on a farm when the ship was being built that's good because I'm sure they're ready to yeah get just get out ready go to war yep let's do it what do you know about potatoes it's the same thing except instead of stabbing spuds you're gonna be stabbin Nazis from the boat yep okay all righty so it was basically like a college frat running a ship oh that's how I picture this okay yeah all right that sounds fun oh yeah the

navy sounds fun the navy is fun the namey not fun namey is not fun no don't know me me um they didn't have a lot of time for training I can't it's not good not a good not a good thing to hear feel like that will come back why like we will hear about that again why well because it's just not good it's not good but you would put a bunch of dudes on a boat you go go get them yeah not good what do they have to learn a lot of things the tremendous amount of it and oh what like turning turning yeah yeah you just like graze over it is very important shooting the gun yeah guns yeah there's a lot to me

it's not just steering there's a lot to maintain put the boat have you have you ever taken when you were a kid did you ever take a plastic boat and like put it in a stream I'm not even gonna answer this okay I'm not even gonna answer the same fucking thing no it's not it's the exact same thing playing with the willy d in a bathtub I play with my willy d in the bathtub all right move on so after four months in the water of training the willy d was assigned to one of the most critical and super secret missions the navy had ever undertaken so I mean there it is I know exactly where we are I know exactly why

we're doing it I get it because of what you just said what you just said is everything it's that's what this is all about right this is about the super secret mission a bunch of idiots went on right so what what you wouldn't do is like yeah hey let's get a bunch of experienced guys on a ship to go on the super secret mission no just go the rookies yeah the rookies have a little fun huh come on let's take these guys out and see what they got we got a good feeling about the willy d time for a super secret mission okay yeah yeah that should be the attitude

president Roosevelt was traveling to French North Africa to meet with Churchill Stalin and Chinese General Rhysmo Schenkheisek no one was to know about the trip until the commander-in-chief arrived safely I mean what's about to happen but I also don't like they had planes isn't there no is that what is about to happen no but I think it's such a crazy idea that that with with all the planes that are out there that they could have flown on yeah that they would take a chance when all those German subs are out there fucking shooting up ships constantly how long does it take to it's like I think it was

like I think it's like seven or eight days it's not that long but it's still it's still going across the crazy waters yeah hey let's not fly I mean I were they shooting planes at it like it seems like you could fly it seems like you would be you could be less trapped in a plane yeah right anytime I mean eight days to have where you could potentially get fucked up over you know maybe they didn't have a seatbelts on planes still they couldn't tie that wheelchair down maybe the president just need a little willy-dee oh girl the president's party about 80 people all slipped out of Washington as quietly

indiscreetly as possible aboard Roosevelt's presidential yacht and cruise down the Potomac River to rendezvous rendezvous with the Iowa at the river's mouth in Chesapeake Bay so the Iowa is the big ship that he's gonna be on okay for a minute I thought he was going straight to the willy-dee well right now it sounds like an episode of 24 yeah down the Potomac I love that they all get they all okay you guys and they all creep out they all creep out of the why not why are you wearing white hey don't get on the yacht okay and now we're on the fancy yacht and now we're on the fancy yeah I mean it's it also

shows you like how different it's gotten with the the president I mean he seemed that mean that's a little it seems a little ghetto it feels a little old fashion to have him fucking sneak a little he's not on foot oh well they roll him he's in a wheelchair I roll him sorry well yeah they're rolling him down there yeah he's cooking good good gonna go go go go go go go go go go blanket my blanket yeah fucking polio good goody cooking goody cooking goody it just seems crazy it feels like the end of a movie no it's completely insane a terrible movie yeah yeah movie that's bad like one of the movies where they

take over the White House like what are those yeah White House down White House down it wasn't a White House down wasn't there were nine of them but that's always down that's the other White House it's always down on the ground yes you know I'm saying no it's different on the ground different I'm writing a movie called White House boom oh it's really good what happens the White House blows up oh and everybody's the president what yeah it's not good it sounds great it's good and then Adam Sandler's not the president Adam Sandler's not the president also on board with the Secretary of State and the Joint Chiefs of

Staff wow so everybody's on the fucking boat now here's a thing my family when I was young when and some families do this when they traveled together they would take separate planes oh wow just in case your family did that yeah well it's kind of crazy but but like my my grandparents and everything if everyone flew to a place they would take separate planes well okay because if one went down yeah there's someone to take care of the kids or whatever yeah wouldn't you fucking do that yeah wouldn't you put one guy in a fucking plane like a put a guy in a rickshaw another guy like I haven't ever seen a movie leave a day

or two apart maybe yeah a little bit of time some some people take the plane some people take the boat right yeah yeah all right guys you got all the eggs just bring the one basket let's roll worst planning ever hey what I feel like it's gonna be fine but if there's an alternate universe this shit gets blown up yes and the world and the world is my Hitler yeah yeah we're listen yeah what things be that different Obama he's the same he's the same thing as Hitler yeah socialist so the ship went down the USB completely fucked in the shiphole yeah the 45 so they're on a 45,000 ton

battleship they're traveling up the bay from the birth in no fork Virginia to meet the Potomac they had to they had to get rid of all their fuel just to keep from running a ground in the river and then they meet the president and he hops on board okay and they're good to go then they gotta go refuel none of it's none of it's a good plan none of it's a good plan how did they get him on gang plank I guess all right he's rolled them right up little rickety isn't it sorry mr. president this is a great plan such a bad plan okay now we're gonna go refuel perfect it's all coming together meet you out farther it's all coming

together the crew of the Iowa didn't know what their mission was until Roosevelt boarded so no one knew and then he came aboard they're like holy fuck that guy rolling up here oh they didn't even know it's him no they and not until they saw them there because they originally be really weird originally they were like the crew was like why are they putting a bathtub in on the fucking ship yeah they were all like what the fuck why is our fucking bathtub shut up some of us are gonna take bath what come on oh oh there's a oh the guy in the wheelchair that's right the Iowa slipped silently out to see was strict orders to Lilo and

make no radio contacts and none the ships can talk to each other okay good the battleship was joined by two escort aircraft carriers which provide air cover and three destroyers to provide protection from the German submarines that were constantly attacking ships in the Atlantic one of the destroyers was of course the willy-dee all right it was the car SS college alpha Omega epsilon here baby hey hey take those shots right out of the shoot things did not go well go boy captain Wilfred Walter of the willy-dee yes back for it Walter of the willy-dee back the willy-dee out of its birth next to another

ship in Norfolk Virginia there was a horrific noise I'm sure it or noises oh boy as Walter and the other officers looked off the bridge they saw that their ship wasn't coming apart the willy-dee's anchor had snagged the ship beside it and was ripping off its railing life rafts a small boat and various other pieces of equipment what how did they didn't pull up their anchor but their anchor was on another well their anchor was like it was like still down uh-huh or or like partially coming up and they went close enough to know that both that they hooked it that they hooked it on and then just tore all the

shit off I mean look I don't know anything I think I could run the ship better already I know about the fucking anchor it's a thing I know that just pull it up and then go pull it up then go yeah be like no get it all the way out I don't know you can do both of us roll that's wrong what about the anger roll go um the willy-dee's damage was limited to scratches on its anchor like in Caddyshack remember in Caddyshack hey you really you hit my boat yeah you scratch my ankle you scratch my ankle that's what it is yeah sorry because they were rushing to meet the Iowa Captain Walther only had time to make a quick

apology before his destroyer continued on its way sorry about that my bad catch you guys around I'm going on the special mission the gas at the gas all right sorry about that good luck special mission sorry about taking your safety boat seems like you could really use it right now my bad later yeah the willy-dee met up with the Iowa and other ships and they got underway the ship ships traveled at high speed all the way across the Atlantic with a smaller destroyer strolling to keep up so they're smaller boats they have a hard time keep it up okay even at maximum speed the trip

would take eight days so there you go there's your answer all right eight days eight days so during the voyage the ships and their crews continued with training and drills that they normally conducted when at sea okay okay sure yeah keep appearance learn a little bit on the side right keep learning yeah it's a learning boat yes which is good you always want to be learning while you're on the boat especially when you're protecting the president of the United States yep who can't walk it was important to keep them busy and in the case of the willy-dee to better prepare its relatively green crew for life at sea

about 48 hours into the mission the ships were making their way through an area known to be infested with you boats when a large explosion suddenly rocked the water firecracker from the willy-dee the willy-dee was doing training exercises oh no dropping fake depth charges but the crew forgot to disarm their anti-submarine weapons although they didn't drop they didn't drop the depth charge into the sea as you'd expect from the story it just kind of rolled off the deck wait and exploded they I mean how what so so there's supposed to be dropping fake they're supposed to be fake dropping like you fake drop them

like you go dropping one but you don't actually drop anything dropping to you don't actually drop anything also they're supposed to be like not armed when they're yeah that makes sense so it's armed and it's just laying on the deck and somehow it rolled someone must hit it like rolls off I mean it's not a can of beer no it's like a keg it rolls off the deck yeah and it blows up and it explodes happens this kind of shit happens yeah all the time you've heard about it a million times so everyone flips out Roosevelt feeling right good feeling good I'm sure he's feeling real good everyone flips out thinking the

president is about to be killed all the ships start evasive maneuvers so they're all doing their fucking plan like radio your planes are fucking taking off from yeah everyone's fucking going apeshit and then they willy-dee it was like oops hey everybody sorry we anchored again they're like you know what that was our bad news bad news good good news president's gonna be fine oh bad news we're really bad at this okay we let a missile drop off our boat the willy-dee was lucky the depth charge us sank a ways before detonating because if it had detonated quickly it would have blown

the stern off the ship that's a problem we you need a stern yeah that's a problem sir sturns and boats are necessary yeah can I get a can I get a ship without a stern no okay so everyone was like willy-dee you fucking suck that's a timeout timeout willy-dee timeout willy-dee go to the corner think about what you've done God apparently felt the same way because the willy-dee was hit by a freak wave stripping everything that wasn't tied down over board and washing a man off the boat who was never seen again so just this random wave is like whoosh fuck you and that's it one guy's like one guy you'll

see you later Larry oh I'm in the water the wave also knocked out the boiler so the destroyer had no power and fell behind the other boats which are the boats are probably like good yeah I said go fucking go go go Admiral Ernest King who was in charge called the willy-dee and told him to get their fucking shit together good and they did not really at this point FDR asked to see a demonstration of how the crew would react if they were actually attacked by Germans instead of one of their own ships well he just saw what would they do well we drop the anchor and rip a ship apart and drop a bomb show them there

you go girl there you go willy-dee hashtag willy-dee Roosevelt wanted to see how the ship would perform if it was attacked but from the air okay all right so it's just from his bathtub show me a strike please like to see that come on guys you know how we're in radio silence let's shoot some shit yeah the way drills work is that balloons are released into the air and then the crew shoots them with the anti-aircraft guns wait the so that it's like target practice okay so they release balloons yes and they shoot them with their guns on the ship okay like you would shoot at a plane sure it's floating like a

balloon it seems very strange you want to see how we train we train hard let the balloons go come on give me some licorice we'll show you what we do here we see shoot slingshots at these balloons these balloons don't stand a chance so so the Iowa so they release the balloons and Iowa start shooting the fucking balloons out of the sky they're just whiten them up you know now some balloons they miss and those balloons float over toward the willy-dee captain Walker what what is what what how is the willy-dee what going to fuck this up or react to this poorly or something no no no I do know that this could be the

success story it is not a success story they're never success he's never been one success story you tried to tell me Rainbow Man was gonna be fine he was okay yeah no he was not he's safe he's not safe safe now he well he's safe no one else is captain Walker wanted to make up for his mistakes and get a little career redemption oh no not the headspace he should be in so he was like hey fuck hey let's double down shoot yeah let's shoot the shit out of these balloons and show these guys what we're made of but these balloons are knee art on the ship no they float it no they're just coming towards the other kind of

they float so they're coming towards them which means they're coming from the direction which the other ships are huh so the willy-dee decides that they're going to shoot in that direction direction of where the president is most likely well I don't know about that they're shooting up towards the sky but still in the direction of okay so they did it they shot the enemy balloons out of the sky right all right and what's the what's next because nothing went wrong there well did it did something happen well then captain Walker was like you know what we got more let's show these fuckers what else we got let's show them

what else we got let's show what we're fucking made of no so he ordered a practice firing of torpedoes what what is he doing what do you tell it's he's let no one know that he's fucking got some fucking science is there the president's there the president's got the sack he's president's the man he's got the captain is like I'm gonna show you well I got some shit on my pants I got I got some goodness just it's like when a quarterback going into a game is like I need to have a big game he's gonna have an awful game yeah so he's like gotta show him drops of torpedoes you know this is gonna go wrong oh I know that it's

gonna shut the balloons out of the sky that was good yeah but this is that's not gonna something bad is about to happen so that this means they don't actually shoot torpedoes they pretend to fire still they go low to one fire we've proven that their practice sometimes goes into reality one fire fired fired to one so they take the first they fire the first fake torpedo fire to they fake fire the second torpedo fire three and shut see you asshole do you see the sounds of a torpedo shooting out of the destroyers hurt what I mean honestly all right are we I mean are you fucking serious and what the fuck are we good to

I mean I love that they're like it's how hard is it to to not have a torpedo in your tooth like you're doing a fake thing how hard is it to take all the bullets out of the gun let me tell you this uh-huh when I light incense and leave the house the amount of attention that gets paid to how okay that situation is because I know it could you know it in a crazy world yeah a fire could start so you've got to be smart about how the fuck when you're doing torpedoes are how does it even happen how do you even get how do you even not check not be aware enough I'm now I'm wondering if you're Jamaican you reveal

too much there's a point in that it wasn't about incense in me just saging everywhere oh yeah I mean look I don't it's completely insane nanos because I even if we're still in the midst of this point your man I mean this is we're not even done at a Morty like what the fuck okay so they hear the hear the swoosh torpedo and here's the other thing is that I hate the other thing I don't like the other thing when they decided to do the practice the training of the torpedoes you mean when they decided to fire a torpedo at the president well they had to pick a target no I'm shut the fuck why even do why

make it that one why make it that one so really sure it's an homage so the target they picked was the aisle explain to me explain to me in what what headspace this is this yeah a practice run no is there somebody was like should we yeah yeah okay yeah well who else we shoot at one of the other ship where the willy-dee we nailed the balloon run let's shoot a torpedo at Roosevelt same thing okay so anyway you were saying they've just shot a torpedo at the president we'll be right keep going I'm sure there's a little more Lieutenant H. Seward Lewis who witnessed the entire event later described the

next few minutes a shit show just after he saw the torpedo hit the water on its way to the Iowa he innocently asked the captain did you give permission to fire torpedo and the captain Walker was like what so what's a so what what's a say you know put the torpedoes in reverse back up back up the right back at the tube the next five minutes aboard the willy-dee were pandemonium yeah guys running into each other hey guys let's focus up we just shot a torpedo at the president jump overboard everyone raced around shouting conflicting instructions and attempting attempting to warn the Iowa okay so now they're on a

secret mission that they've created so so they're supposed to have complete radio silence yes the entire time yeah that's the order but this is it feels radioable right doesn't seem like this is we can actually because the reason you have radio silence is so that a German sub doesn't know you're out there and it doesn't shoot a torpedo at you I would say yeah right yes it's it's for safety for the president so now the torpedo has already been shot we're probably in our worst case okay so you do you pick up the radio yes you do are you fucking telling what about the orders radio silence all right so I'm sorry so what

you're telling me okay yeah is that they've shot a torpedo yes at the president yes they're panicking right but they decide they're not going to use the radios well they're following the rules the rules were also to not shoot torpedoes at the president that was just nobody said nobody said that yeah that's inferred nobody that's insinuated by the premise that's insinuated by the premise of taking the fucking man no they only said don't talk of the radio what should we do well I just I know what we can't do is radio in so I don't know I don't want to lose my job I I know that I know if we use the radio we're gonna get

fired I don't know what's gonna happen if the torpedo hits it I assume will also be fired so meanwhile in a bathtub the geniuses on the willy-dee the geniuses on the willy-dee decide not to break radio silence to tell the president they shot a torpedo at him so they use signal lights so they send his signal band up top with a very important job it's a little light he doesn't like yeah think he opens up code of light opens up and closes it but I guess he was a little bit freaked out yeah and he yeah he's a little bit panic first of all five months ago he was pulling up zucchini on a farm and now he's trying to save the

president's light life with a light well now he just has to find a way to signal other boats that they've shot a friendly missile towards Rosa it's a hard message to communicate in the spur so he told the Iowa with his signals that there was a live torpedo in the water one two I mean how do you what is that message even I don't know well I'm sure there's messages for torpedo torpedo coming you know what is better is to just pick up the fucking radio okay wait this this might turn out fine I bet it is okay but it could have been okay year so he says torpedo in the water and then the next thing he says is is that

it's headed in the other direction I'm gonna go I'm gonna go did I can't so then he quickly realized that he fucked up and he tried again but this time this time he signaled that the willy D was going in full reverse speed so I wrote on the I was like he said a torpedo is coming at them okay no I guess he wants us to know they're backing up all right guys so just to be clear the willy D shot a missile going that way and is backing up all right should we maybe ditch him yeah whatever I was like okay okay thanks good to know let him know that we that's cool do they have LSD on that I'm not just want to let you know

we're backing up why is it panicking so back up back up man it's fine finally someone was like hey maybe we should call them on the radio hey it's been two minutes and it's torpedoes headed towards the president so they broke silence and screamed lion which was code for the Iowa lion come right quickly so they're like ball your fucking ship we shot a torpedo at you plus we're going in reverse I'm surprised they were even able to say that right hey Iowa lion turn right also we're backing up really fast we shot torpedoes in the other way we're backing up fast lion right Roosevelt being the coolest

human being alive asked the secret service to roll him over to the edge of the ship so he could see the torpedo approaching wow okay that is pretty cool okay he's like just don't get my cape cut in the wheels yeah mr. presentation roll me oh see this shit I want to see it I'm gonna fucking die I'm gonna die like a man bully yeah so the secret service pulled their guns and tried to shoot the torpedoes it neared all right so we're just having a competition of who knows the rose I was like yeah well that's kind of what they have to do I mean that's their job either that are jumpy that jump in and get in front of

it I don't know maybe they get hit and they might be able to okay I mean if you shoot a torpedo I assume it explodes I would think it's hard I would think it's very hard casing yeah I'm sure that the shell of the top and you probably have to shoot it yeah you can't shoot I mean it would be like in a movie when the guy's like shoot the gas tank and he doesn't it but it's just that's not I know it's hard to shoot yeah but we're saying if you shot it you're right I probably wouldn't do it yeah yeah okay make yeah probably not even had a hard case on not even had a hard casing or not like you could just shoot it and it

doesn't mean it's explode you start to hit the detonator or whatever yeah yeah there's a lot of riffraff in that stupid idea but they had to do something made of it with their secret service listen they're already smarter than the willy D oh without a doubt they should have been shooting at the willy D yeah just unloading clips the Iowa made a sharp turn and the torpedo just missed the ship I'm fucking real the torpedo detonated in the ship's wake about a hundred yards away then the Iowa aimed all her main guns at the willy D good yeah I'm on the Iowa side yeah time to be time to be stern dad well tough love

because they figured the ship had been taken over and there was an assassination plot at hand of course or they were fucking idiot or way our torpedo training drill went wrong while the president was here what could you assume no I know you you can't be like they couldn't really accidentally shot a torpedo at the present Captain Walters final utterance to the Iowa was in response to a question about the origin of the torpedo his answer was a week we did it you know like you know when you're in trouble and like you you know you have to like face the music a little bit and like

it's just yeah you know you feel overwhelmed yeah now imagine it in this situation when the reality is that you've just shot a torpedo at the president yeah and you and I'm I will say the phone's ringing but the radio is clicking on yeah and you know you have to get it yeah and you're in charge yeah and you don't want to be you know you want to pick that up but at the end of the day you're about to field the call of hey why'd you just shoot a torpedo with the president I mean we had we had one so we thought we didn't think it was there in our defense we shot two fake ones we did we did shoot two fake ones really

good and they went they fake they were nothing and we nailed our target we nailed the fake ones yep but uh we did shoot a we did shoot a torpedo it's um you guys our friends was no anyway my bad and we feel awful you're about the anchor thing hello hello hello hello hello Walter then demanded his crew explain what had just happened no one copped to it captain Walter tried to assure the the Iowa that the whole thing was just an accident this stuff happens you read about it all the time so Adam King was like hey Willie D can you get the fuck out of here or we're gonna sink you okay yeah so that was it for

their big mission the crew followed orders and sailed to Bermuda where they found themselves look for the triangle don't come back till you found the triangle Willie D they found themselves facing armed marines who were there to arrest them so they were taken off the ship at gunpoint Jesus all of them every single guy on the crew now now our would do we now envy the guy who got swept away in that big way a little bit more yeah yeah sound like he maybe got the yeah the long end yeah he got the great perfect storm ending yeah yeah this is the first time an entire Navy crew and the only time an entire Navy

crew has been arrested all of them so I was sleeping you too fuckface the ship was surrounded by sea mines so they put sleep they took everyone off the ship they arrested them and then they put sea mines around the ship now at this point are they operating from a point of like they could be dangerous killers or are they just like we're so mad at these morons what if it's a ghost ship no they're just so mad at them that they're like fuck everything about these guys good the crews were held crews held for several days while a closed door inquiry took place the outcome was you imagine the outcome was delayed for

several days until torpedo man Dawson admitted that he left the private in the torpedo tube which caused the torpedo to launch I mean after the torpedo launch Dawson tossed the primer overboard to hide his mistake oh god I love these are just not love him it's just not people who are ready for this position so everyone's running around scrambling trying to save the president and he's grabbing the evidence come on get overboard so the entire episode was kept secret nobody knew about it you know really we were never out of that no lieutenant commander Walter and several of his officers were sentenced to shore

duty where they were given obscure shore assignments so they're basically go go clean that fucking toilet yeah and they probably accidentally like launch torpedoes oh shit we just flushed it to torpedo man lot and Dawson was sentenced to 14 years hard labor but president Roosevelt intervened in his case and had him released as the incident had been an accident okay so that's cool of him pretty cool seems to be the most calm of anyone yeah there's a reason I think he was the president for like yeah yeah cuz when there was a torpedo coming at him he was like roll me up the poop deck let me get a gander want to look see my

death thing you should edit I'll watch it oh god let's party after 1943 the ship was commonly hailed by other ships with the greeting don't shoot where Republicans the willy D became a black sheep the Navy thought the ship might be better off in an assignment where it could do little harm one week later the ship was sent back to Norfolk where it was prepared to head to the Pacific it was then off to the Panama Canal and then up to Alaska where it was now stationed in the Aleutian Islands make sure those islands don't go anywhere now that's your job all was well for a year just cruising about in Alaskan

waters where nothing happened no I'm sorry you said mm-hmm the phrasing of what you just said is what do you mean troubling why because you just said all was well for about a year which makes it sound like oh willy D's net damage is just before the willy D was about to leave a reassignment one of the sailors on board got drunk at that point he decided to shoot the big guns I mean he shot a shell having no idea where it would land it's like it's like a cartoon well I mean yeah this is like it's so crazy it's it's like if you wrote the screenplay people be like okay we can't do we need you to be a little more

realistic it landed in the base commander's front yard exploding in his flower garden he just happened to be home while having a dinner party for fellow officers in their lives it's so great captain Walters even on the ship anymore no it's just still the same assholes oh yeah well you know what it is I bet you too if you get assigned to the willy D at that point you are like oh I'm kind of like a fuck off we're assholes because we're assholes we called you assholes like yeah it's like animal house yeah yeah so now they get on the willy D's like it's party time I love it got it shoots the fucking pops a shell

okay so now the war isn't the client and it's climax so the Navy decides to send the willy D out for a camp bad call now they have a more seasoned crew right it's been a year they got more seasoned guys the willy D leaves the Aleutian Islands for the Western Pacific performing escort duty to the Philippines and taking part in operations at the Gulf in the Philippines that's when it just hangs out with no another ship for money this is where it goes great the willy D fought in a few battles and perform well probably because they had a new captain and experienced crew but they fought well in late March 1945 the

willy D was sent to Okinawa where patrolled far out in the ocean to intercept Japanese aircraft before they got in close to bigger ships the willy D's reputation took another hit when it riddled another sister ship with gunfire okay that happens in the Battle of Okinawa that happens you what you you sometimes you see a ship and it's and it could be a plane wait right there what you if you see a ship you're like that's a Japanese zero that happens that happens all the time that planes in the water shoot it it's a water plane it's a giant plane shoot that giant water plane the destroyer did manage to shoot

down five enemy planes okay great willy D took down five planes great on one patrol willy D was fighting off kamikaze's did you know that you know how many kamikaze's were successful percentage you what yes ten three percent really yeah she's right how would how could you do that so poorly it's like it's your vantage point well first of all they're all on meth right there I mean but are you telling me you're unfocused well but you you might be you're looking for cigarettes over eager or you know too busy like where's that my bro you're one thing you're joking jerking off the video games

you're playing so on June that's gonna be so fucking weird though and you're just like god none of them are hitting the fuck is going on it's hard to train for this I guess in our defense this is a hard thing to train for on June 10th 1945 the willy D fell victim to an incredibly unique kamikaze attack as one of the planes came in low and aimed straight for the willy D the willy D's gunners fired furiously trying to down the plane before it struck them this time their training paid off and the crew would joist when the plane was shot and fell down short of the ship right so they're all like yeah we got that

motherfucker I feel like but the Japanese plan was moving so fast that it hit the water and went underwater and continued to move toward the ship it kept moving until it was right under the willy D and then it exploded well that's crazy the willy D was lifted out of the water all power was lost and the steam lines were broken and then fires broke out the true tried to fight the fires and fix the ship for three hours then the order was given to abandon ship and 12 minutes later it sunk not one man on the willy D died no one knew of the willy D's crazy adventures until 1958 oh right yeah Jesus so the willy D was taken out by an

enemy plane that had already crashed the willy D might be the only victim of underwater kamikaze piloting that kamikaze pilot was piling this is a really weird ending did not see this happening it saw that coming at some point too I mean it's kamikaze's they're like I'll do a shot willy D holy shit man I mean obviously the meat there is the fact that a torpedo was shot I mean fucking present I mean come on it's so great like we're we're really incompetent it's amazing because it's bad decisions that may gave the possibility to that actually happened right and that's what we do we like to

make rash calls and then at the consequences we're like what you fuck up wait until I'm preparing a a dollop which is the longest research when I've done Iraq war what's there to talk about oh my god what's there to talk about you cannot believe it's so much worse than anyone ever understood well I I mean not to jump ship mm-hmm when you see the aftermath like not enough people know about the what it's done to the generation like the chemicals that release them like mutations and the radiation and like it's fucking unreal but I'm sure you have it's a lot anyway dates I don't know I have a bunch of

I don't know when this one's gonna be released no I don't know either but I wish I did a lot of dates go to my Dave Anthony comedy calm and my dates will be up there bye bye album shame chamber follow us on Twitter the dollop Facebook page we have that you can subreddit we have on the Facebook red and looking at the red in the Facebook page a little bit more yeah pretty crazy yeah and and go leave a review on itunes that helps us out tremendously I don't know this probably go back to LA potfest but who knows well then what a great time it was oh my god how fun was that you little drunk a little too drunk thank you thank

me yeah I was on I was actually on howl oh yeah that's why I wasn't moving yeah you were so slow yeah anything you anything oh no well I guess no because I don't don't know yeah don't know when okay I'll be somewhere at a point you know I'm in yep okay bye bye bye