The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 234 - Daniel Sickles

Episode Date: January 16, 2017

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine Daniel Sickles, Civil War general and all around terrible person. SOURCES TOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH 

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week. I read a story from American History to my friend. Gareth Reynolds has no idea what the topic is gonna be about. I have to stop. What are you doing? He's big bad. Come on. How was that bad? He just went up on the table and... That's not some stuff over. Trust me. Where? Trust me. I know. I've read this book before. He was definitely given a like I wonder if this falls kind of look. I wonder if this thing falls. That's what they do. Their whole brain is like activated by like they'll tap something. I mean yeah the little tail. Yeah he's mad. Look at him. He's looking over at the desk. He's not mad. He's in business mode.

He's closing deals. No he's not. He's in a desk chair. Now he's far away from the desk and he's like well this is bullshit. You don't need to close deals. He's on Bluetooth. What? There will be no more questions about what Jose is doing. Do you want to look who to do? I'll do one bottle. People say this is funny. Not Gary Gareth. Dave, okay. Someone or something is tickling people. Is it for fun? And this is not gonna become a tickly podcast. Okay. You are queen fakie of made-up town. All hail Queen Shit of Liesville. A bunch of religious virgins go to mingle and do my thing. Hi, Gary. No. Has he done my friend? No. No. October 20th, 1819. Okay. Daniel Sickles

was born into an old well-to-do New York family. His father was a patent lawyer and politician. It was expected that Daniel would follow his father into those professions. Okay. But as he grew up, became a parent, he might not have the temperament for the needed education. Okay. Although totally could be said for, I'm sure I have teachers who wrote that on my evaluation. I'm sure that's all my evaluations were. To farm connections and settle his temperament. He was sent at age 20 to live with the DuPont family while completing his studies. DuPont, the patriarch had been Lorenzo DuPont, a writer and Catholic priest. Even though DuPont took vows of celibacy, he still cranked out a bunch of kids. Wait, let's not. I'm flinging it.

I'm flinging it at it. There's no contact between this and that. So great. He kept saying he adopted him. I adopted this one too. I adopted it young. I put it in her and here we are again. Another miracle. Daniel came to live with the family. Oh, sorry. I thought we were recording. Oh my God, dude. Your reaction was dynamite. You were so worried. So Daniel came to live with the family a year after the priest guy died. So he's lived with all the kids of his. You know, one of the daughters, Maria, was the same age as Daniel and rumors began that the two were having an affair. Okay. These may have been helped because her husband was 26 years older than her. She had been married when she was 15. Oh, God, how was that ever

a thing? I mean, how? We have so much in common. Adolescents, the list goes on and on. You're an adolescence. I'm middle aged. All right. Rather creepy. I looked at some of your drawings. They're great. Come to bed. And they had a three year old daughter named Teresa. Well, she was almost time for her to settle down. Their last name was a Bajouli. So Daniel studies improved as his parents had hoped. When the next depart head of the family died, Daniel moved out of the house. First, he became apprentice apprentice and studied law in the offices of ex US Attorney General Benjamin Butler. And wait, okay. Are we just here? This dude from the last wait, the next one, the next one. I'm sensing we'll hear about

him in the future. The same guy. Okay. And an apprentice is apprentice. No, he was just a it was just a printer's apprentice, a printer's apprentice. I think he's an apprentice. So you're going to want to make a bunch of copies and then bring coffee in there. Okay. So you're going to want to make a bunch of copies and bring coffee in there when you can. Oh, okay. All right. And then I got to get out of here at 115. I'm golfing. Okay. And actually today, the boss is going to leave a little early at 115. He's golfing. Yeah, you heard. Yeah, he's going to be golfing. Yeah. He also Daniel also quickly picked up a reputation as a ladies man. Okay, particularly one who enjoyed prostitutes. Well, are you a ladies man when

you're just hiring horse? Boy, he's swimming in it. Huh? What's your secret? I give them money. Constant flow of cash. The printer's office was near five points with 17 brothels nearby. Daniel was like weed stores. Daniel was actually considered quote a notorious user of prostitutes. That's not a ladies man. I mean, I'm, well, I mean, Daniel also became aware that he could pick up young and more innocent girls at the corner of Dwayne and Broadway. And as he worked and became more successful, he found the more fancy prostitutes were at the Broadway theater in the gallery. His love of prostitutes may have been why he in 1844 raised $1,000 for a political pamphlet that he never made. Wow. Wow. Jane Funk was born.

Jumping in. Was born on March in March 1823. A farmer in upstate New York. Her mom died when she was eight. She got a basic education and was considered a bit of a nerd. Then when she was 17, she became a victim of what moral reformers consider to be a major social problem at the time. I'm going to hate this. A seducer. She became a seducer? No, she was a victim of a seducer. She was a victim of a seducer. Seducers were older men who seduced young naive women usually after promising to marry them. And after they had had their way with the young women, the seducers would leave them. The young women were then considered to be quote ruined. Oh, God. What? You know, it like, well, somebody put something in there. A couple,

a couple things. One. Somebody's been there first. And literally a seducer you should hear about and be like, Oh, OK, I'm aware of that. But obviously, but the idea that yeah, like the idea that I mean again, like it's the same. It's it is this crazy double standard of just like you think this is double standard. Oh, man, I've had sex with so many women. Way to go, Gerald. What about your wife? Caught her cheating. That's horror. Yeah, pretty much. But I mean, just the idea that someone's ruined. Yeah, like the last thing now, like the last thing you want to see for this version. Yeah, yeah, which even makes which makes the idea of like suicide bombing to go get 76 virgins in heaven. Like that is like if you're I don't you think you could tweak their heaven a

little bit. The worst. You know, you're going to get 30 virgins and then 36 whores. See who you're hanging out with more pal. I would rather have that. They were so then these women were shunned by middle class Victorian society. And this being seduced by a seducer was the third most common cause of prostitution at the time, because they're just rejected. So you would be you would be seduced and that your only option would be to basically go into a life of prostitution. Yeah, right. That makes sense. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Yeah. You slept with a man. You're a whore. Okay, where do I work? I guess there's a place down the street. Okay. So after Jane had been seduced and abandoned, she went to New York to stay with her brother, John, who was a carpenter.

Jane got work at a hotel, but it was not working out. And in 1843, she started working in a brothel at 120 Church Street. She picked up, she picked the name Fanny White. Oh, boy, that is. I mean, you're English, so you're thinking of it differently. Yeah, okay. Yeah, most people at Fanny. I don't know Fanny back then as a name or if she's really calling herself pussy white, because I mean, Fanny White sounds like something they sell at CVS. I mean, look, there's a lot of fucking English people coming over on boats now. So the idea that Fanny might be a common street name is very possible. Sure, sure. And I guess if you think about how long you're at sea, White could also be considered, you know, bragging to some extent. But Fanny did not have the air of

victimhood that many of the other sex workers did. She was smart and she was beautiful. A few months later, she moved to Julia Brown's brothel. You know, that's not Julie Brown. Wait, wait, Fanny White went to Brown? Yeah, Fanny Brown, Fanny White went to Brown. Meet Fanny Brown. Julie Brown was the best known prostitute in America and was in several popular tour guides. What? This is such a weird, like, I don't know, you know, we just like, it's at the time, so much crazy shit was taken so seriously. And yet the idea that prostitution was like, put it on page two of the pamphlet and why to come here? What do you mean? How do you spell come? Go see the Brooklyn Bridge, then a bunch of vaginas. Come see the world's biggest thermometer,

then have your way with whores here. Fanny was very shrewd and by 1847, at 24 years old, she was managing a brothel. That was also the year she met Daniel Sickles. Okay. Soon they had developed a romantic relationship and he no longer had to pay for her services. By the way, she better keep her name Fanny Sickles also sounds insane. Fanny Sickles terrible. It's freezing down there. Though it was known Daniel did give her expensive gifts and cash. He just didn't have to because he was her man. Right. One night. One night Fanny's servant was accused of stealing money from one of Fanny's rooms. The servant was charged but in court on the witness stand proclaimed quote, you know, Miss White, all that I took was a bundle of keys from Daniel Sickles

pocket while both of you were asleep and you know that I took nothing else. Everyone in the court room burst out laughing at the exposure of Daniel and it was written about in the press. But Daniel didn't seem to give a shit. He already had no problem walking around with Fanny in public. None of this slowed down his public career. He opened a law firm and was admitted to the bar in 1846. He became part of the political machine at Tammany Hall. He groomed and used those political connections and in 1847 was elected to the New York Assembly. But he had quote, tendency towards berserk and full-blooded risk. It's bold. That's not a great. It's a business card quote. Wait, what? I'm insane. Give me a call. That would be the best thing to put on a business

card, tendency toward berserk and full-blooded risk. Leave a message if I'm not there. I'll call you back or maybe just shut your door. And he showed that when he invited Fanny, he showed that when he invited Fanny to visit him while the New York State Assembly was in session. Whoa. First he introduced her to a group of his fellow assemblymen during a brunch at the hotel. And then he brought her to the assembly chamber and gave her a tour. The WIG members of the assembly were greatly offended that a prostitute had been brought into their chamber, even though none could explain how they knew that she was a prostitute. I mean, she looked at it the way she had it. If she has a face. She was better to me. She said, don't tell anyone. The assembly ended up

censuring Daniel Sickles. Which is just kind of like a slap on the wrist. Yeah, it's like, you're a bad boy. But she was like, am I? How bad am I? How bad am I? Fanny, get in here. Bring the device. But nothing was stopping Daniel. He was elected as a delegate to the Democratic National Convention in 1848, which just enabled him to gather more strong and powerful friends, including the Van Buren family. Okay. In 1851, Fanny bought a building and started her own high class brothel. She listed the name Bagioli as the taxpayer on the property. This was Maria's husband. Okay. Remember Maria? No. The family he moved in with. Oh, okay. No one knows exactly how this came to be or what the relationship of Bagioli was to Fanny,

or if there even was one. And their daughter Teresa was now a young teen. She was beautiful and being trained to be a wife and hostess at the Manhattan Convent of the Sacred Heart. Sorry. Real quick question. If you were seduced, how did people know? I know. I thought of that when I wrote it. I guess that everyone thinks that when you take some virginity, there's a popping sound. Yeah. What sort of nonsense were they convinced? You have a scarlet letter on your taint where no one can see it. And that still goes on in a lot of cultures. Oh, yeah. This is still a thing. But from what I understand, there's just no way to actually tell. In India, I mean, the craziest like if a girl is raped, the wiser play

is to not tell anyone. Right. Because if you do tell someone, then you need to prove it. And if you can't prove it, then you're a liar. And for the most part, you're just never going to prove it. Well, this is this is a less funny part of the show. Yeah, this is this is what we like to call the serious halftime. So anyone if this wasn't sad enough. Well, so. Okay. So now we have so you're right. We have women who who if they get seduced, then they're ruined. But then also this won't this girl who's not ruined Teresa is his teenager. She's going to wife school. You're right. So we're just treating women great at this point. Yeah. What like which truly which would you rather honestly? I probably would rather just be I mean, honestly,

prostitute, I don't well out of those two. I mean, maybe one seems like you're like, you're rewarded for like being sort of like different. And then the other you can like your life is to your life is to sit there and be like, that was amazing, Harold, more beef. I guess the worst part of being a prostitute back then is the fact that you can there's no sure protection. You just die from sure. Yeah, sure. Daniel kept in contact with Maria and her family, particularly 15 year old Teresa. Okay. Soon young Teresa had a crush on Daniel. Oh boy. American lawyer George Templeton Strong said he thought Daniel was just going to the house as a predator and was blackmailing Bajole. And Daniel was soon enough courting young Teresa. Wow.

In most political circles, this sort of behavior will be frowned upon and lead to him being tossed out. But the Democrats of Tammany Hall were down. Daniel was often proving his worth to the group. When a fellow Tammany Hall member was running for Corporation Council, which is like a city lawyer sort of thing, his opponents put a letter against the candidate in with the ballots and put them in the and put in envelopes, then the envelopes were all supposed to be mailed out. But Daniel got some of the Tammany Hall gangs together, drove several carriages into the post office, took over the building, ripped open all the mailbags, took out the envelopes and burned them on the post office floor. Wait, therefore, like so then they there was no voting

for. Right. But he also stopped the letter from going out. Right. Okay. He was arrested, but through his connections, the trial was postponed indefinitely. Okay. Then one month before the next presidential presidential election, he asked Teresa Bajole to marry him. She was 15. He was 33. Well, you know, it's time for her to settle down. Yep. Her parents at first were against it, but went along. Why? I don't know. I don't know. It doesn't make any sense. That's so weird. He's a catch. Get her out of the house already. She's 15. She's rotting. Good lord. And they went along with it in the end. The couple was married in March 1853. And it was very apparent at the wedding that Teresa was pregnant. Christ, no. A local paper that always

went after Daniel made fun of the situation. The two moved uptown and rented a house. And Daniel kept screwing other women. Teresa became aware of the rumors and was surprised that he was doing it with older women, particularly that he had not given up fanny. Oh, and I let this part out, but apparently fanny was furious when he got married. Yeah. Totally. Yeah, I would understand. Right around this time, his Tammany Hall connections paid off when he was made the corporation attorney for New York City, which was basically a payoff. This meant he was going to get a lot of dough working for the city as an attorney. Okay. Next, he went to Washington to lobby. And while he was there, Teresa gave birth to their daughter, Laura.

James Buchanan was offered the job of representing the US and England, and he was looking for someone to work as first secretary while he was there. Oh, boy. Daniel was recommended. Oh, no. He took the job. Oh, this is like a sequel. Now he's in Europe. But baby Laura was too young to make the journey so Teresa would not be able to come with great news for him. He's like, oh, perfect. We'll Skype. Naturally, he invited fanny to come with him instead. So when Teresa was on the dock waving goodbye to the pilot, she's like, bye, the husband and his horn. Bye. Say bye to them. Don't be rude. In England, James Buchanan took a liking to Daniel was very impressed with him. He did note that Daniel liked to spend money.

Quote, Dan spends a lot of money, a great deal of money, but I find him a very able lawyer and a great use to me. Well, that's a little red flag. And Daniel was known for spending. He had been in debt for years and at this point was just moving debt around to stay above water. Okay. The main reason Buchanan and Dan were in London was to convince the British that the US should be allowed to acquire Cuba by negotiating with Spain. Okay. Cuba's got Spain. America's trying to get it to make it part of America. Sure. And these guys are like trying to grease the wheels with all the other countries. Right. Daniel would travel between. Now we just invade. Yeah. So much easier. I mean, eventually we did. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Daniel would travel

between Madrid and Paris and London and the Netherlands working on the deal. And in between, he'd take fanny to the theater and show her the sights. Now Daniel had an enemy in New York named James Gordon Bennett. And three years before, some of Daniel's friends had attacked Bennett over an arc lead written about them. Okay. And Bennett was horse whipped brutally on a New York street in front of his wife. Jesus. I mean, whoa. It's a different time. Whoa. What is that? It's a different time. I mean, talk about unanticipated. Look, I'm not going to fight for you. Nah, we're going to whip you with a horse whip. Wait. Good. Oh, here you watch, lady. Oh, no. So he was not a fan of Daniel and his friend.

Yeah. Did we did we lose you when we horse whipped you in front of your wife? Yeah, it wasn't great, man. Yeah, that feels kind of when our relationship splintered. We were going to do nuggies. But then, uh, yeah, I don't know. We just started spitball and we decided we're going to whip you with the whip for horses in front of your wife, your lovely wife. So Daniel was invited to meet the queen. And he brought fanny with him. Oh boy. Wow. That is that's something. And at the reception. Oh, no, no. He introduced her. He introduced her to the queen. No, no. Mrs. Julia Bennett. What? Wait. The guy had the horse whip's wife. Wait. Wait. Just just he went. It's just a full deck move. Dude is just

he is just laying webs on webs. Remember said he gaish and risky behavior. Yeah. Was that an ad lib or was that planned? I don't know. But James Bennett was not very pleased. Yeah. Wait, what? I don't remember meeting the queen. He wrote about it in the New York Herald and it cause caused quite a stir in the US, but not so much in England, which was fortunate because right as it hit the news, Teresa was arriving in London and Fanny was getting on a boat and going the other way. Wow. Teresa definitely. He was living that sitcom life, but with boats. Oh my God. It's three's company. Yeah. Exactly. Teresa definitely heard about it, but she missed the storm. He's saying goodbye to one. She's like, why are you saying goodbye? I just got here. He's like,

I mean, I'm waving. Hello. Hello, baby. Why are you yelling pussy at that boat and waving? Huh? No, no, no, no. I'm just, no, don't worry about it. I'm saying goodbye to my friend. I hope he gets laid. Goodbye, Fanny. I'll miss your pussy. All right. You hungry? Kid got big, huh? So Teresa pretty much missed the whole storm that Bennett was causing in New York by writing up all the shit about what Daniel did with the queen. But the whole time Daniel was away, people joked about his relationship with Fanny. After two years in London, his contract was over and he returned to the US. Nothing had happened. Cuba was still in the hands of Spain. And then Teresa and Dan moved to Lower Manhattan. Fanny White was now seeing a wealthy man named Jake LaRoy,

who also had no problem taking her on his arm around town, but he had VD, which he gave to Fanny and his own wife. Fanny was no longer a prized clean prostitute, although she would go on to marry a man who was a gold digger and tried to bang her niece. Eventually, she died at 37 of a stroke and autopsy showed she had tibian syphilis, an extensive bleeding around the brain. Yeah. Daniel handed over all his debts from London to the US Treasury. That's a lot. That was a lot just happened to her fast, OK? Yeah. No, I just, I just wrapped her up. Yeah. I just figured I'd wrap her up. Yeah. Yeah. So Daniel comes back with, he's basically got all his receipts and he's like,

this is everything I spent in England. And he gave it to the US Treasury. They're like, that's not how this works. Wait. Where's my per diem? So he owed tons of money in London, which he just blew off. OK. But he didn't give a shit because he wasn't in London. It was like out of reach. Right. It just didn't matter. That's like when I had to get staples in my head in France once, because I fell off my bike. Sure. And they sent me the medical bill. And I was like, well, with all due respect, it was like nothing. But I was like, yeah, I'm not, I mean, no, sorry, guys. These staples are free. So he started up his law business again.

And they eventually moved to the suburbs. Dan Dan was next talked into running for Congress by Tammany Hall. And he did and won in 1856. James Buchanan was elected president in the same election. So Theresa and Laura joined him in Washington. And one of the interesting men in town at that time was district attorney Barton Key. Many women considered him to be the handsomest man in Washington. He was sandy haired, 39 years old and widowed. And his father had composed the Star-Spangled Banner. Wow. He had a lot going for him. Yeah. You like that, sir? My dad wrote it. Daddy did that. You know, you can put your hands on my hair. So on the night of the inaugural

Barton met Theresa, the two bonded over their love of horses. After the 34th Congress concluded. Okay, movie's like, I love horses too. I like horses. Horses. Do you say horse or horses or horses? I like horses. I like horses. It's loud in here. I hate this song too. After the 34th Congress concluded, the sickles moved back to their suburban home and Dan back to his law business. But he would still occasionally go to Washington on business. He was at his hotel one morning, eating breakfast when he was handed a note from Brooklyn Navy Yard engineer Murphy. I couldn't find his first name. Is he a wrestler? I hope so. Murphy accused Daniel of attacking his character and Daniel wrote an angry note back

saying Murphy's letter was, quote, apparently intended to deter me from duty as a representative. A few days later, Dan was sleeping when someone started pounding on his door. He opened it and there was Murphy holding a cow hide whip back. Now it's a cow whip. Sure. And he burst in Daniel fought back and soon was throttling Murphy in a corner. And at some point he asked Murphy if he was satisfied yet and Murphy nodded. Yes. Dan let him go. They kept the whip. But Dan didn't have a black eye, so he wouldn't be able to keep it secret. And he wrote a letter to the secretary of Navy and had Murphy fired. Murphy responded by writing a letter to the evening post, quote, graduating from the worst sinks of inequity in the city has led. He has led

the life of a professional vagabond in debt to everybody. A fashionable row. Yeah. That's a word. Row. Yeah. Despicable fellow. A fashionable row with a degree of acquired smartness that belongs to men who are only bold and bad enough to challenge the laws of morality and to fight the easy virtue of frail women. He stands before the public, a disgraced and vanquished man. And as such, I take my leave of him. Wow. He went public with that. That's a comeback. He didn't know he was messing with Eminem. That is. I didn't know you had mad flow. All right. OK, OK. All right. My turn now. I'm going to jump back in. I'm going to jump back in. Congress went back into session and this

time Dan rented a big house he couldn't afford to entertain guests. Always a good move. So so also many men around this time became began to become enamored with Teresa, who was quite similarly simply becoming super hot. If you saw a picture, you'd be like, well, nope, she's super hot. Like you always see pictures of women like she was a beauty. And then you see and you go, no, she's pretty. But by, you know, right. But then this she she's like a timeless beauty. She's like stunning. Right. Really good looking. These men also I know that's why I married her when she was a teenager. Most people back then you look at they go he was he was gorgeous. And you look and you go, I mean, he had a face. Yeah, like a normal. Yeah.

These men also saw her as they're starting to see her as neglected by her husband, Daniel. OK. Do you think it had anything to do with the fact that she was neglected by her husband? Yeah. The sickles hosted the top people in town, including often the president. And while Dan was busy in Congress, Teresa would make the social rounds in Washington. These events were also often attended by Barton Key. I remember him. Some of the women began asking if Barton was following Teresa around. Ha ha ha making jokes. I had a feeling that they were hooking up because because when someone loves horses. Yep. You're like this is rare. People who love horses always fuck each other. Barton was sort of

an acceptable escort of many of the women when their husbands were busy since he was a widower with children and perfect cover and suit Barton was acting as Teresa's escort on occasion. For his part, Daniel was taking women to the Barnum Hotel in Baltimore and banging them. He was doing his thing. Right. People something tells me he's not going to be OK with Teresa's behavior then. Yeah. People started to notice that Barton and Teresa were together not just in social situations, but in unexpected places. One of Dan's fellow congressmen was asked to look in on Teresa while Daniel was away. And when he and his wife did, they found Barton and Teresa in the study drinking champagne. Oh wow. OK. When they left, the congressman's wife said,

quote, Mrs. Sickles is a bad woman. OK. Right. How dare she. People also saw them riding horses together. Another young man who worked in the interior department had been in a tavern when Barton and Teresa came in soaking wet from a rainstorm. Barton got a room so Teresa could dry her clothes by the fire while he waited in the kitchen. Sure. But the man said Barton was not in the kitchen. Oh, where was he? In the Teresa. You know what? I'm going to head upstairs and I'll be in the Teresa. Kitchen, kitchen, kitchen. When word reached Dan about this incident, he asked the young man to come see him and he interrogated him. The young man backed down saying he not said he'd not stated any of these facts about the kitchen or the clothes or anything.

Dan then went to Barton and told him what the young man was saying around town. And Barton, for his part, was outraged by the accusations and said, this is the highest affront that could be offered to me and whoever alerts it must meet me at the point of a pistol. But the discussion went back and forth between the young man and Barton and friends of Dan. And then on April 8, 1858, a California senator decided to hold a costume ball. Dan became ill that night and decided not to go. So Teresa went alone, dressed as Little Red Riding Hood. Oh boy, she's about to meet a wolf. Barton was dressed like an English hunter. Okay. And the ball went on and then the two of them left together at 2 a.m. Okay. Teresa told their driver, so there's a carriage, there's

a driver, they have a carriage. Sure. They have like a fucking chauffeur. Yeah. She told the driver to just drive around Washington. It was pretty obvious there was going to be some fingering or more in the back of the carriage. And after a while, the driver was told to drop Barton off. It turns out five stars, please, sir. Turns out this was nothing new. The driver had been taking Teresa to different destinations for a while and Barton was always there. Usually Barton would spend some time in the carriage while the driver drove around. Barton also came to visit the house when Dan was out of town. One night, the driver heard them at one o'clock in the morning on the sofa in the study, quote, I knew there wasn't no good work. I knew they wasn't at no good work.

Boy, it sounds like he was lucky to have the job he had. He was Scottish. Really? Yeah. Seems like he's got the bloody work going. Excuse me, what are you trying to say? Well, one night I heard them on the couch and let's just say everybody worked for that living. Sorry. What? Just I approached the window and I heard what can only be described as somebody quitting their job. So hope that's clear for everybody. No. I'm being very clear. I've said too much already. Approach the window and everybody got a brand new resume. Okay. All right. Glad that's cleared up.

Basically, they would also meet in the cemetery and disappear for an hour and a half. Like she would have her driver drive her to the cemetery. She stood like, can you just do in the carriage? This is haunting. He's like, basically, they were just boning everywhere. Finally, near this sparking fog. Finally. Finally, the congressional session ended and Teresa and Dan went home on July 1st. Barton Key saw them off and told them he would visit and he did. Oh, man. That's probably one of those things where she was like, visit if you want. Oh, okay. Well, that Daniel just is like, yeah, sure. Yeah. If you're in the neighborhood. Yeah, I'll come. I'll be there tomorrow. I'll come. Great. We look forward to...

I'm gonna come. Hey, honey, you know, I'm thinking back on that conversation. Was it me or did Barton say, come a lot? What do you think back on it? And he did. Well, Daniel was campaigning for the next election. He actually visited twice because he said he was headed upstate. So instead of just making the plan, I'm coming to Newark, he was like, I'm passing through and then I'm coming back. Okay. Nice. Daniel went on the reelection and then they returned to Washington and Barton rented a house near the sickle. Geez, this is a little... Does he has no idea? No. It was so close to Dan and Teresa's house that you could see it. And a neighbor would often see Barton and Teresa going in and coming out. Okay. In the middle of the day. Now, this was a mixed neighborhood,

both black and white families and pretty much everyone in the neighborhood knew what was going on. Everyone even knew the signals. Barton would come in and hang a ribbon in the window so she could see from him, his house, signaling that he was there and it was okay to come over. This is some planet earth stuff. And the male hangs a ribbon in the window, alerting the female of his interest in fornication. Her vagina opens slowly. People around town also started to realize what was going on and began to ward Barton. He was putting himself in danger. You think the ribbon's too much to give away? Meanwhile, Daniel was screwing a married woman who he would meet in the hotel in Baltimore.

I love that it's all like that she she's living this torrid life. This whole story is about him of avoiding him finding out. Meanwhile, he's just banging everything. Yeah. He'd be livid if I found out I replicated by his behavior. Now, then one night, Daniel and Teresa were at a party in Washington and a messenger walked up to Dan and thrust an unopened envelope into his pocket. Oh boy. Now, this is the time was code and it meant do not open this until you get home. Yeah. Okay. I would pick up on that code anyway. So when he got home, he went to a study and read the letter, which explained how his wife was screwing Barton and how he would put a ribbon in the ribbon in the window, etc. Just

fucking spelled the shit out. It was signed your friend RPG. So he didn't person did not say it was. All right. The next day, Daniel went to the next morning, Daniel went to the street where he questioned all the neighbors and everyone had seen them and pointed to the house. Well, it's like I was trying to say before, if you look, if you listen closely, it sounds like the two of them have been hired for the same job. Okay. So I know this is tough to hear. No, it's not. It should be. They're getting the same job. They'll work at the exact same company. Okay. If you understand my drift. Exactly. I don't. It just sounds like they're working at the same place. Exactly. They're working at the exact same place. That's my point to you. That is. Yeah.

Okay. That's not if you need a shoulder to cry on you. Let me know. I don't. It's not a big deal. Yeah. It's just not a big deal. Right. Well, they both are now employed there. Okay. Okay. It was a good talking to you. Well, look, you've got strong character. I mean that you're handling this unbelievably well. You're taking this bad news. Well, okay. Thanks. Yeah. Okay. I mean, he's screwing her. So what? All right. Ta-da. What the hell did you just say? Bye, matey. So Daniel asked a friend to go stake out the house and see if it was her. So a guy goes into. What? Like, okay. So now he's got a guy who's. Sure. It's like, the stake out with Emilio Estevez. He's in the house. This guy's across the street.

Right. Richard Dreyfus. Daniel was so upset that he sobbed while he told the guy the story of his wife cheating on him. Yeah. But your heart can only break so much after this behavior. Like, you get like, I understand, but that is the. That's your logical sensible brain. Yeah. Right. It's getting in the way of the dollop break. Well, apparently he was just unaware he'd been boning a prostitute and married women during their marriage. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, it's all confirmed and Daniel confronts Teresa in their home. Okay. First she fainted. Oh, boy. And by the way, that's the best. As bad as a confrontation can go. Have you been cheating on me? Yeah. Bam. Then she denied it. But by the end of it,

she came clean about everything and Daniel made her write a confession. Well, we're seeing that age difference. And this is what she wrote, quote, I have been in a house on 15th street with Mr. Key. How many times I do not know, I believe the house belongs to a colored man. The house is unoccupied commenced going there. The latter part of January have been in a loan and with Mr. Key usually stayed an hour or more. There was a bed and the second story. I did what is usual for a wicked woman to do an intimacy of improper kind. I undressed myself. Mr. Key undressed also we went to bed together. And since she admitted that they had. What did she admit it? Well, she just, I mean, that's, you

know, I mean, I know, but like legally, you'd be like, Well, what did you do? Well, well, I made a weird stew while we were naked. I'm a witch. And we took a nap. We all know what it means. Okay. But we're all saying the same thing. And since she admitted they had done it in the sickles home to he had her right. Mr. Key has kissed me in this house a number of times. I do not deny that we have had connection in this house in the parlor and on the sofa. Wow. I mean, you've got to start using. Look, actual words, if you're ready to have a connection, I'm ready to have a connection. I'm ready to connect. I mean, that sounds like what Martians would say when they're ready to bed. That's what that's what this time was. Are you sure you want to have a

connection? I'm connecting right now. I'm almost done connecting. Don't connect through that one. Oh, sorry. There we go. Daniel made Teresa sign it with her maiden name. Oh, wow. Okay. There were two women visiting the house and Daniel had them come in awkwardly and sign as witnesses. We're just going to drop off this pie. I just wanted to say hi, but I guess. No, thank you very much for the pie. Sign this letter that says my wife's a whore. Okay. Thank you right there. Put your John Hancock. Thank you. Speaking of Cox, unbelievable. Hey, are you women single? I'll bang anything with a heartbeat. I feel weird. Yeah. Now you know how I feel. I'm broken up over here. Want to have sex upstairs? Can you believe this whore? Can I finger in those those bushes?

Can we? No. All right. Daniel then took Teresa's wedding ring and he brooded around the house. He had a couple of friends come over. One found him face down on the bed, buried in a pillow and he said, quote, I am dishonored and a ruined man. I cannot look you in the face. And now he's just a cock. Wait. Right. Is that the word? This is amazing. Well, I think there are plenty of people that cheat and then get upset when their spouse cheats. Yeah. But even today it's super common. Yeah, but it's still not okay. No, it's not okay. It's ridiculous. That morning, Barton woke and went on his usual routine, which meant waiting to bone Teresa. I'm going to put the well going to make a cup of tea and put the ribbon up.

What's your plan today, Barton? Well, I put the ribbon up, so I'm going to wait to bang and then we'll see what happens. I mean, I'm going to have a connection this afternoon. I mean, this guy was an attorney general, so he would go to work and then in the middle of the day, he'd be like, I'll be gone for three hours for fucking and then walk around near his fucking friend's house and go bang his wife. Barton kept walking around the Sickles neighborhood all day long. Oh man. He was spotted about eight times walking this way and that. Hey, he was signaling Teresa because he kept twirling a handkerchief. Oh dude, it's just he's dying. He's dying. And you can see the male now is getting frustrated with the female. He knows that she's not allowed to leave her new habitat,

but he still is trying everything he can, though it will remain futile. So she's not coming to the window because she's, you know, locked in her room or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. She's grounded. And then finally, Dan Daniel saw Barton. Oh, hey. From a window. Hey. Hey, white fucker. Hey. Can Teresa see this handkerchief? Daniel rushed downstairs and yelled quote that villain has just passed my house. My God, this is horrible. It might be the best quote of all of our dollars. He sounds like an actor. I know it's crazy. My God, this is horrible. And he threw his flowers on the floor. Daniel went out and confronted Barton. All this happened in Lafayette Square. The president could have seen it from the White House if he was looking out the

window. I wish he had. Daniel yelled, Key, you scoundrel, you have dishonored my house. You must die. And he shot a Barton, but he missed. Okay. Then he stepped into the street and dropped the gun. Barton then lunged at Daniel, who pulled out another pistol. And Barton backed up and yelled, don't murder me. Then he took out his opera glasses and threw them at Daniel. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No. Well, you know, before you showed me how big of a pussy you are, I wasn't going to. Here, take my opera glasses. I threw his anchor. My money clip. My pocket watch on my monocle, more unrelatable items to heave your way. So Daniel fell to his knees. And then he shot Barton in the upper leg. And Barton said, I'm shot and staggered around. So this is a play.

This is a play. There's also a ton of people watching because it's the middle of the main square. Right. He asked Daniel not to shoot him again. Well, what are you gonna, I'll throw more opera glasses at you. I feel like we're done. I feel like we're done. Look, I threw opera glasses at you. You shot me. I'll throw my purse. Barton then fell to the... Let's do one where you throw the opera glasses and I'll shoot for variety. Barton then fell to the pavement and Daniel moved closer and shot Barton in the chest. Some men then ran and came between them and Daniel said, is the scoundrel dead? He has violated my bed. Does it now look like a Dr. Seuss? Like a betrayed Dr. Seuss. So Barton was taken to a nearby boarding house where he quickly

died. A page, a White House page, who had been, who had seen it, ran back to the White House and told the president, who responded, quote, I was afraid it would happen. Everybody knew. Yeah. Everybody. Yeah. Even the president's like, ah, that fucker. Was the ribbon up? Being the president of the United States, he naturally told the page to flee instead of being a witness. Okay. Interesting. Get out of here, kid. Well, change your name and move. Daniel went home where a couple of cops found him. The mayor and chief of police came to his house and Daniel handed over the opera glasses. Barton did throw it at him. Wait, he seriously thinks that's what this is about? I suppose you want these. Here you are. This is what he tried to kill me with. So as you can see,

we were both in absolute peril. Yes, but I shot him in the chest again after he threw the opera glasses my way. Fair fight. So Daniel turned to go upstairs and the cops weren't sure whether to let him go because Teresa was up there and he might hurt Teresa. But Daniel. Wait, wait, what? There's reason. The reason to not let him go is because he murdered him. I don't know. Okay. But Daniel agreed that he wouldn't hurt his wife, so they let him go upstairs. Well, Dave. Daniel went upstairs and looked at Teresa and said, quote, I've killed him. Now there's no there's no nobody wrote down what she said or did because she was the woman and at this point they didn't care. Right. Now Daniel's Daniel Sickles confessed and

surrendered and was put in jail. Pretty much everyone who was anyone in town came to visit senators and congressmen stopped by and wished him well. Wait, was he in a sickle cell? Yes. Okay. Pretty much everyone came to visit congressmen, senators. Yeah, I'll stop by wishing him well. The president said him a note. Hey, man. Hey, hope you're doing crazy. Crazy what you did. Oh, fuck. What a day. I was just talking to Russia, but it's all the same. Sorry about the glasses. So many people were coming to visit Daniel that he was given the use of the head jailers apartment to welcome them. Okay, so he's not in jail anymore. Who's the head jailer? You know what? I'll take the cell. You go live where you go live with my family. Someone wrote

and I couldn't verify it, but someone wrote that he was allowed to keep his gun. But I cannot believe what I cannot believe that. Okay. And big shot lawyers stepped forward to defend him. Of course. One would go on to become the secretary of state. So even though he had confessed, his lawyers came up with a never before attempted defense. Well, Dave, these are always pretty good. They claimed that he had been driven temporarily insane by Teresa's cheating. You know, that's pretty good. That's pretty good for these. That's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. Now 1% of cases. Yeah. The newspaper. Yeah, there was like a nice like heyday of the insanity plea where it was like, well, I guess he was insane. People still try it all the time.

Yeah, but not, but it was like effective for a little while. People like he was, he was temporarily mad. All the newspapers were on board. They wrote that Daniel was protecting other innocent women from the lustful Barton key. He's a serial fucker. Barton to be clear Barton. Not Daniel. No. A seducer, if you will. And I will soon Daniel was a hero to the general public. Amazing. It also helped that Daniel started a campaign against his wife in the press convincing them she was a harlot. He used the confession she had written by force. She wrote this on her own. Daniel was seen as the victim. Amazing. And Daniel Sickles became the first person in the US to be acquitted by reason of temporary insanity. Wow. Good Lord. When it happened, the crowd in the courtroom erupted

into thunderous applause and a new legal precedent was set. A good one. Around the country, newspapers proclaimed that justice had been done. And when Daniel was released, everyone who was in support of him, everyone was in support of him. He's like this fucking hero. Yeah. Until he announced that he forgave Teresa and they were going to bury the hatchet and that their quote love is greater than ever. Oh, wow. That was not a smart move. The public turned on him instantly. Oh boy. He went from being a national hero to being loath. I was temporarily insane again. That was another bout of my temporary insanity. Keep doing it. Okay. Even as I might have just been insane that whole time and it wasn't that temporary. Right. Or double temporary insane, which is a thing

now. Okay. Did it happen to me? No more questions. Even his old friends in New York would have nothing to do with them. He was now completely disgraced. Okay. He wouldn't run for reelection and was soon unemployed. But then the civil war broke out. Daniel saw this as a way to get back in the good graces of his fellow Northerners. Due to his background as a militia leader in New York, back in the day, he petitioned the governor, the New York governor for permission to raise eight companies of volunteers. The governor granted his request. Okay. Using his old connections at Tammany Hall, Daniel started signing up men. He contacted newspaper for press coverage and said the unit would be made up entirely of selected Democrats. Okay. It took just two weeks

before the companies were full. The governor then gave Daniel authorization to recruit an additional four regiments to form a brigade. Okay. Now, one of the main reasons behind all this recruitment was that whoever recruited a unit was likely to become the commander and even more likely to become a general when the fight was on. Okay. So he's really, he wants the credit. Yeah. He's looking for a credit. Right. This was Daniel Sickles main drive for putting together this force and entering the war. Sickles used all his connections, getting old friends and military experienced men to come on board. He talked an independent regiment into joining through his Tammany Hall. What else was their plan? What? The independent regiment. I mean,

well, they could, they could go fight on their own or join up with a different one. Like, they're, they're an indie label. So they can, all the big labels are trying to sign them. Sure. I'm just saying when it comes to battle, it might be time to get behind Geffen. Yeah. But you might not want to get behind Geffen when you can get behind Bill Graham. Okay. I think we're both a little lost on that one. I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I don't think sub pop should sign with it. No, I just don't follow mud, honey. What is this? Through his Tammany Hall connections, he got firemen to join who made up a regiment.

During this time of crisis, it looked like his insane past was forgotten. He was now a man doing everything he could do for the cause in New York. But there was one problem. The rest of the country wasn't on board. Daniel was a Democrat and had always been a Northerner who sided with the slaveholders. It was pointed out, he was clearly doing this to reform his image that New York's economy replied, relied on Southern merchandise and that he was from corrupt Tammany Hall. His brigade then began to be depicted as morally bankrupt. A cartoon appeared in a Baltimore newspaper that showed the sickle brigade surrounded by madam's liquor stores and cheap cigars as they were recruited in the five point

slum. The recruits were depicted as Irish or blacks who were considered to be the bottom of Northern society. Good. And then Daniel made it worse by calling the brigade Excelsior. Well, there's a reason for it. Hey, it's kind of like when Tiger Woods posted that picture of McDaddy Santa. You were like, did you see that? Oh man, he posted this picture of himself like shirtless with like this weird Santa hat on and like these glasses and so you can like see his nipples. And he's like, my kids love it when I do this. And everyone was like, look, Tiger, nobody really likes you anymore. And that made us like you less. Hey, that's worse than anything. So don't check in like this anymore. That's amazing. He was like, wait, there's more.

This group is called Excelsior. Well, okay, that's the that was the New York State motto. Okay, I guess context helps a little which gave the implication that this was the official state brigade. Okay, people of state were complaining the brigade was made up just of city Democrats. Okay, they're all Republicans. Sure. And they were resentful and they didn't want to know they didn't want a known murderer and scoundrel to lead the Excelsior Excelsior. The governor then ordered Daniel to disband 32 of the 40 companies he had raised. Okay, Daniel was furious. He would now not be eligible for a general star. And he didn't think the governor should have any say. Lincoln had been the one who called for volunteers and Daniel had responded. The soldiers reported

to Daniel it was between him and Lincoln. So Daniel went to Washington and met with Lincoln. Wow. Because his why Lincoln's wife was friends with Daniel and Teresa when they were all right in the day. Right. So he pushed the president to federalize the brigade and take control from the governor. Now Lincoln's in a bind. He needed the men but he also needed the governor backing him. So he told Daniel to go back to New York and just train his men. When Daniel got back, he was even more furious because the brigade was a mess. The men were all over City Hall Park. They were hungry, dirty. Many of them are drunk and they were unruly. Hey, we saw that cartoon and decided to go with it. So we're living the tune baby. That's what we're saying here. So

live in the tune. Well, the problem is that you are gone and we saw the cartoon and it was like we're going to just live like that. Yeah, you like horse. Oh, you're that Daniel. Hey. Hey, man. So Daniel marched them down to Crosby Street and got them all haircuts and shades for 10 cents each. That'll show me up. He then had them transported to a race track in Queens, which would now be their new campground. And there they were militarily trained, but it wasn't working. There were still too many distractions in Queens. So he moved them to Staten Island where they were surrounded by a marsh. Meanwhile, you're right. Let's see a gambler of sex with that marsh. Meanwhile, New York had said they should be broken up and refused to pay

for the brigade costs. All the bills were going to Daniel. So we owed hundreds of thousands of dollars. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. I got my own army. Mexico's got this one. The men were obviously not being paid as they were in limbo between state and federal government. So they started deserting. One entire company tried to leave and join a Pennsylvania regiment, but Daniel had them brought back to the camp by gunpoint and sentenced them for desertion. Okay. So that's an execution. Oh, God. But he postponed the execution and was sued by the company's captain. Eventually, they were all allowed to leave and all their paid travel expenses were he paid all the travel expenses basically.

He really backed down. He didn't have any authority at all. Right. The soldiers had never been sworn into the armed forces. So the military discipline did not actually apply. Right. Legally, there was nothing keeping him there. Oh, and he's calling himself general. Okay. Good to know. So okay. Hey, fake general, we're going to take off now. Is that cool? Hey, I don't know if his insanity ever faded. I'm going to have you all killed. This is play army, dude. I'll pay for your travel. Okay, fair. Never negotiate a negotiator. By June of 1861, it was about to fall apart. But then Lincoln's need for soldiers proved too strong. It's like a movie. And the troops were federalized. Okay. Now the government would pay for the soldiers' upkeep and provide

equipment, but he still owed all the $100,000. Sure. And so it didn't help them with the creditors who are now coming to the camp and demanding their money. Shoot them. They're Southerners. Then word came that the Union Army needed men to protect Washington, D.C. and Daniels Brigade departed for the south. As far as all the debts he left behind his main partner, Captain William Wiley, his job was now to find money to settle with the creditors. Oh, my God. Who doesn't want a partner like that? Hey, Will, you just want to find a bunch of money? Uh, like $300,000? I got to go with the boys. Wait, wait, sorry. Can I say one thing? Yep. It feels like you're having all the fun and you're getting... Oh, no, you get to...

You get to find money. Oh, I didn't look at it like that. Okay. Give it to people. All right, bye. That's all Captain William Wiley would do for months. Daniel never offered to help and Wiley eventually came to hate Daniel. I'll kill him. In D.C., Daniel's command was iffy. Generals needed to be confirmed by the Senate. That was usually no big deal, but Daniel was not a normal case. Sure. Republicans remembered him as a legislator who would oppose them on slavery, plus he was a hothead slash murderer. Yeah. They even wondered if he would take the brigade and go fight with his friends in the Confederacy. Right. Okay, so not a lot of trust. He was not confirmed throughout the summer and fall. Meanwhile, Daniel spent all his time away

from his troops, lobbying Congress for a vote to make him a general, just dealing with his own problem. Come on. That's why I'm here. Come on, please. In February, 1862, a reporter, an old friend of Daniel and Teresa, submitted parts of one of Lincoln's speeches to the New York Herald. The connection between the reporter and the speech was Lincoln's wife, who was friends with him. Congress was getting ready to investigate the First Lady and the reporter, which would have caused a lot of damage to the president, but Daniel came in and saved the day. He represented the reporter as legal counsel and talked a White House gardener into testifying that he had seen the president's speech on the president's desk and memorized it word for word and given it to the

newspaper. Wait. Go on. No, you go on. Run me by that one more time. So you found a gardener, but the White House gardener. Yes, but the speech. So what's in the speech? Well, because it's wartime. I don't know what's in the speech, but it's a wartime, so you can't be having the speech get out before it's ready to get out. Oh, okay. So he, right. So sort of like inventing blackmail on the White House lawn. Yes. So the First Lady gave it to this reporter who had some printed. Right. And then to get him out of it, he had a gardener. He's creating a gardener for some reason was just kicking around the president's desk for an hour or so. Memorize the letter, went to the paper,

and was like, right this while I got it. Come on, guys. I don't know how long it's going to stay in the old dome. Come on, I'm a gardener. I can't even read, but I know this. All right. Here we go. It was one of the most obvious bullshit stories ever, but it worked and Lincoln avoided a scandal. Wow. Daniel assumed. So let's just understand that America has been bullshitting people forever. Well, yes, it's yes. Daniel assumed he would now be made a general. He was not. Ah, so Daniel decided the thing to do would be to go win some battles and they'd have to make him a general with all the positive press coverage. He might actually become a great battle general because of how bad he wants to be a general. Well, so he takes his brigade and they

all get on ships to take them to the Virginia peninsula. Okay. And as they're on the ships, Daniel learned the Senate had voted on his generalcy. Had? Yes. Okay. They voted no. Damn it. At that point, the divisional general took over command and ordered Daniel off the ship because he was no longer part of the army. Oh, come on. Daniel's attempt to rehabilitate his reputation was a total failure. Oh, God. I mean, it ends more disgraced, but he wasn't done. Oh, good. He spent April in Washington constantly reminding Lincoln of how he had helped him with the scandal. Remember? I did the thing. Remember? The Gardner? The Gardner? I remember. Don't make the Gardner lie. I know the Gardner can say he didn't remember everything. Shut up about it. Shut up about it.

Gardner can come back. I understand. Why was the Gardner in the house? He wasn't. What about the fact that Gardner can't read? Okay. What do you want to do? I take off my big hat and beat the hell out of you. Beat the hell out of you, general. Shut up. You're good. Meanwhile, Daniel's brigade fought and lost a quarter of the men at the Battle of Williamsburg. Due to Lincoln's pushing on May 13, 1862, the Senate voted to confirm Daniel's rank of Brigadier General. All righty. The vote was 19 to 18. Oh, my God. He was now Brigadier General Daniel Sickles. Put in command of the Excelsior Brigade. All right. Off to made up land. So, he commanded in battles at Faroaks and the Seven Days Battle, but he missed the second

Bull Run battle because he got there too late. Well, listen. How'd you guys do? Oh, everybody's dead. Oh, boy. It seems like everybody's dead. So, it went bad. It smells like, well, Gettysburg made Daniel. Okay. There, he disobeyed orders and moved his troops at a position by a mile. Okay. This week in the Union line and caused Lee to, generally, the Confederate, Lee to focus his attack on Daniel's men. So, because his men were so out of place, wait, but Lee was like, what are these guys doing? And he focused all of his, not his intention though, right? Well, that wasn't his plan. No, his plan was like, we'll go over here. Yeah. And then all of a sudden, these guys out of place and he's like, that shouldn't be. And so, he attacks low hanging fruit. Let's

eat that. Uh, his Daniel's brigade was annihilated because they were exposed at all sides. I mean, hopefully he was just shouting excelsior. But this move may have helped the Union because generally had not expected it. And when he focused his troops on Daniel's men, instead of where he originally intended, it threw off his well planned strategy. Right. And blunted the Confederate advance. He got greedy. It's still open debate, but that's what a lot of people think. Right. Okay. But Daniel's IDC ended at Gettysburg with one of his legs being blown off during the battle. After the leg was cut off, Daniel headed straight for Washington as soon as he could move. And there he made sure his version of events were in all the newspapers

and he was the first one to bring the news of the horrific battle of Gettysburg to the press. But how is he like, how is anybody in a couple of ways he doesn't have a leg to stand on? Right. I mean, yeah, like he's coming. Like you're just like, aren't you the insane guy who just is people crazy at lies? It doesn't matter, man. People get the news. They're probably, you know, we see how the news works now. They get it. They run with it. No, no, no. The news now is just like the evaluator. I mean, they do a great job of letting us know what's actually happening in our world. True. You know, and they're not focused on the wrong thing at all. No, yeah. They got the eyes on the prize. Eyes on the prize. What matters is that literally you have a breaking news graphic

on 24 hours a day, seven days a week, as impossible as that is to be actually happening. So this is what happened back then, too. So the first thing people read was how Daniel Sickles was the hero of Gettysburg. So he's like labeled himself the king of pop and everyone was like, he is between his heroism, his lost leg and a few well placed politicians. The military's call for him to be court-martialed for blatantly disregarding orders during the battle of Gettysburg were halted. Wow. So the military wanted him. Yeah, it fucking ruined. Yeah. As a cherry on top after the war, Daniel claimed the reason for his positioning at Gettysburg was because he believed General Mead was a coward. It was going to take his troops and run away.

So now for his fuck up, he's throwing another dude under the bus. Yeah. So the main general under the bus. Okay. All right. So he said he advanced to make General Mead fight. And he said he did it to sacrifice himself and his men to blunt the Confederate onslaught. That's just, it's like, you know, the movie, The Room? Yeah. That's what it's like. Right? Like, for anyone who doesn't know, like The Room is like the worst movie ever made. Yeah, never. And it's just full of like technical errors and terrible acting and I mean, just so many holes and it's become this cult thing. And so the director who initially was trying to direct this in his head was directing his opus, this amazing film. Now 10, 15 years later

is like, yeah, so like I made an amazing comedy. Right. And you're like, no, dude, you don't get to own that. No. Negative, sir. So now he's like, well, what I thought was that a lot of the men would die, but God, what decoys? He actually testified against General Mead in front of Congress. Wow. Surprisingly, Teresa and Daniel did not work out. Wow, that's crazy. They were together briefly. Did he try hanging a ribbon? They were together briefly after the trial, but soon were estranged and she died in 1867 of tuberculosis. Daniel continued in the military until 1869 in various positions. He was then appointed the minister to Spain where he was said to have had an affair with deposed Queen Elizabeth II. Wow. He ended up marrying the very young

Carmina Cray, the daughter of a Spanish politician, and they had two children. Moving back to the U.S., he was the sheriff of New York and once again elected to Congress. He was also chairman of the New York Monuments Commission, but then was forced out when it was discovered he embezzled $27,000. I thought he's going to be banging some of the statues. Every principal, senior general who fought at Gettysburg was memorialized with a statue except for Daniel Sickles. When he was asked why, he said, quote, the entire battlefield is a memorial to Daniel Sickles. In 1897, after years of lobbying, Daniel Sickles was given the Congressional Medal of Honor for his acts of bravery during the Civil War. He lived the rest of his life in New York and died

May 3, 1914. He was 94. The bone from his amputated leg can be seen in the National Museum of Health and Medicine. The bone? Yeah, the bone, because they cut off the leg. Yeah. I don't know why they saved the bone. Yeah. Well, they probably saved the leg and then the flesh fell off. They were like, here, keep this. We'll make a wish later. I guess they did that with generals back then or something. I don't know. Yeah, but even then they would be like, yeah, but it's not like a general's leg. It's this fake general. So he's a peach. Yeah, real good guy. Yeah, I guess that might be the American dream we keep talking about. It seems pretty close to like what it actually is instead of like, hard work and kindness will get you far. It's like, lie, lie, lie, push,

push, push. Just be a narcissist. Okay. I mean, whoever shouts loudest wins. It's just failing up in such a spectacular fashion. Yeah, it's an interesting time. Back then. Right. Interesting time back then. Different now. Yeah, so like, I don't know. It is, it is, it is, it is strange that we have always been this, like, it's that easy to manipulate us. I mean, yeah. Seriously, that's all I got. That's it. Go Packers. Go Packers. Pack Attack. Yep. Get a snack. Don't rhyme it. Just hit the stop. Put a snack in your pack. It's time for a backpack. Hey, definitely delete the last part. Packer. Delete all this. Or shacker. What? We're gonna record. All right, I'm out of here.