The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 240 - North Pole Madness

Episode Date: February 6, 2017

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the insane drive of Robert Peary to reach the North Pole and gain fame. SOURCES TOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH 

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podcast. I'm doing fine. I'm fine. Sure. Each week I read a story from American History. I Dave Anthony. Come on. I Dave Anthony read a story from American History to my friend. Gareth Reynolds who has no idea what the topic is gonna be about. That's right. Step into the winter circle every now and then Anthony. We'd love to have you. I'm in the winter circle. No you're not. You're in the Fentstown area. Three takes to get the intro right. God do you want to look here to do? I'll do one bottle. People say this is funny. Not Gary Gareth. Dave okay. Someone or something is tickling me. Is it for fun? And this is not gonna come with tickling

podcasts. Okay. You are queen fakie of made-up town. All hail Queen Shit of Liesville. A bunch of religious virgins go to mingle. And do what? Pray. Hi Kavie. No. I see you've done my friend. No. It's May 6th. Yum. 1856. Okay. Robert Edwin Peary. Right? Yeah. So this is a period piece. Was born in Crescent, Pennsylvania. His father died when he was three. Every every day. It's like he would tell people that and they'd be like you should be thankful. Mine died when I was a month and a half. Lucky to have him. So. Mine died at childbirth. My dad died at childbirth. I bet that's happened to something. Oh for sure. The dad just falls over. Yeah. Oh man. Gout. Gout finally caught up

with Travis. Not here. So I'm gonna name him after him. His name will be Gout. That's his last name though. Gout is his name. Gout Gout. He's Gout Gout. He's beautiful except for all the black veins. Dr. Gout Gout. So his mother took him and moved to Portland, Maine. Peary went to Boyden College. Graduated in 1877 with a civil engineering degree. Okay. Doing all right. Yeah. Got a job at the U.S. Coast and Geologic Survey Office in Washington, D.C. and joined the United States Navy in October of 1881. Okay. Dude's rolling so far. Sure. Everything seems really fine. The U.S. Navy commissioned him as a civil engineer with

the rank of lieutenant. Okay. He was sent to Nicaragua to survey for a canal to be built through the country. Okay. Just didn't have to go. How do you? It didn't happen. But also when you do that, you're just like, there works. Well, yeah, you go around, you go, this would be a good place for a canal. What about from there to there? That's how it works exactly. All right. I'm gonna head home. Goodbye. Good luck digging. Well, they're actually funny enough, they're building it now. This? They're now, well, I don't know if this one, but I don't know if exactly where they surveyed, but they started building the canal a couple years ago. In Nicaragua.

Yep. Okay. So he was sent to do the canal. He was there from 1884. Nicaragua. Yep. Because it's separated? Because no, because there's water in a canal. I got it. He was there from 1884 to 1885 and worked as an assistant engineer and then became the engineer in charge. Okay. While he was in Nicaragua, he wrote in his diary that he would be the first man to reach the North Pole. Well, as people do when they're kicking it in Nicaragua. So they had the secret back then. Yeah. So he was just manifesting. Yeah. Yeah. I will get to the North Pole. I will get to the North Pole. There we are, diary. You and I have made a handshake with paper and

pen. And I shall close thee and it shall be done. And the next page says, and murder Santa. And then I will begin the murder of not real things. I will stamp those goddamn elves. You're gonna be covered in elves, Santa. Say it, Rudolph. Who's the best in reindeer? British naval officer John Ross had attempted and failed to find a Northwest Passage in 1818. When he was in Greenland, he noticed the Inuit had iron. Okay. Now the Inuit are people. Yes, they are. In the Greenland area. Yes. So they have irons. Eskimos was what they were formerly referred to. I don't know if that's offensive now, though. Is Eskimo offensive?

Well, I mean, shit, you know, I believe it's not okay. I think Inuit is the accepted term here. But Eskimo, I mean, there's still like Eskimo pies. That is the beautiful thing about our culture is they're like, sorry, though, we made a product when it was okay. No, no, sir, we made Coon cheese before. Sorry, Redskins. Isn't that what it's called down in Australia? Coon cheese? Yeah, that's great. They use shards of iron to make harpoons, knives and other tools. Obviously, this was very important in Greenland because there was very little wood there and the only other common substance to make tools with was bone. So Ross was very

curious, curious about where they got their iron. Okay. They told him it came from a far away mountain but not would not tell him where because they needed it and obviously they didn't trust him. Yeah, I mean, look, hey, where you keep this? What do you get this from guys? Here's the call you always make if you're not white, don't tell the white where the thing is. Never tell the white where the thing is. Don't tell the white where the stuff is that you need. If we could go back and tell people in history anything, it's don't tell the white guy anything. Don't let the white know a thing, okay? So, excuse me, I'm a

prospector. I'm wondering where that delightful irons come from. Okay. Why I only need a piece or two. Show me your precious precious metallic area. Ross ended up going back to England with just some of the Inuit's tools. In his report to the British Museum, he mentioned that there was meteoric material in the tools. I already I don't I don't like the game plan. It's fine. This was one of the things that peaked Peary's curiosity and made him want to make the journey. What we call a Peary query. In April 1886, Peary wrote a paper for the National Academy of Sciences proposing methods for crossing Greenland's

ice cap and he headed off that year. Okay. He wanted to do it alone, but a Danish official explained and convinced Peary that he would die if he did it alone. Yeah. Who wants to go alone? I'm going to the North Pole alone, gentlemen. Good day. And good life. You will never see me again, but I will have gotten there. All right. So, the Danish guy joined in and Peary's mom gave him $500 to buy supplies and book passage. Okay. Mommy, I'd like to go to the North Pole. I don't know, Mom. Some of the guys are being mean about the equipment that I got, sir. They're saying my pickaxes are good enough. They don't. I don't even want to go to the North Pole anymore.

I'm just going to go in my room and cry, I say. Oh, here's $500. Oh, thank you, Mamsey. So, they went on a whaler. They were taking there on a whaler. They made it about 100 miles across Greenland before turning back because they didn't have enough food. How does that? I feel like that's not the first time I've heard that. How like you overpack. But I think they treat it like socks. Overpack. There's going to be so many fish. What? No. And cows. The recipe for disaster. And there's going to be tons of tomatoes. It's like when you decide to take the, when you like have no gas left and you decide to push the freeway anyway. Yeah. It's like

that, but with survival and food. It's with your life. In 1886, Perry met Josephine Diebeschitz. Sorry, of the dipshits? Diebeschitz. Sorry, he met Josephine Dipschitz. Diebeschitz. Diebeschitz. Diebeschitz. Diebeschitz. Diebeschitz. Diebeschitz. You know, actually, Diebeschitz is a way of Scotch. It's Diebesch. What? I'm going to show you this name right here. Read that one with a little red on underneath it. Oh my god. It's Diebesch. It really is Diebesch. In 1886. Her name is Josephine Diebeschitz. And O.J. didn't marry her? No. Oh, that's so great. She was a very smart, progressive woman. But Dave, it's gonna take me a minute. Look, not all names are

great. Diebesch. I mean, that's a rough one. That is, I mean, that is one, we're going to keep the name in America. What's your name? Diebesch. This is my girlfriend, Keelahore. So she's very smart and progressive. She was a business school valedictorian and believed women should be... Nobody knows this school more than Miss Diebesch. She believed women should be working in jobs instead of just mothers. When they met, she was working at the Smithsonian Institution. She had taken over for her father's position as a linguist when... Dr. Diebesch. Dr. Mr. Diebesch. Mr. Dr. Diebesch. Excuse me, Mr. Diebesch. Yeah, please, call me Mr. D.

She resigned from the Smithsonian when she and Piri got engaged. So that kind of flies in the face of the whole... Yeah....wibbit should be out of the hope and working thing. Right. Because she quit right away. Yeah. Right. So they married in 1888 and honeymooned in Atlantic City. Oh gosh. Wonderful. Piri's mother went on the honeymoon with them. If there was ever a time for a Diebesch. Mommy's gonna show me where to put it. Okay. Super awkward. Oh god. I mean clearly he was connected to his mom after his dad died. Yeah. What do you mean you guys don't have a cot? I guess she's gonna have to share the bed with us. Mommy's gonna sleep in bed.

Don't worry. She watched me do my emissions. And when Piri was assigned to Philadelphia, the mom lived with the newlyweds. Oh god. Strangely, Josephine and Piri's mom didn't get along. Oh god. Yeah. Yeah. You know the deal. You don't even need... You don't know the deal right away. The mom... I mean, talk about a perfect last name for the mom. She was like, Diebesch indeed. Josephine told Piri his mom should go back to Maine. But he had an even better idea to get out of the situation, which was to go back to Greenland, which Piri did in 1991. This time he had a lot of... 1891. Sorry, 1891. This time he had a lot of

funding from different scientific groups. He took a more difficult route heading more to try to determine if he could get to the North Pole through Greenland. So he's taken a route that's more difficult but seems like it would work better. Now the first time when he met the Inuits and found out about the iron, that was in Greenland. This isn't the same guy you found. That was the first explorer that went there. Oh, okay. He just read about in a book. Oh, got you. Okay. Yeah. So there were several men on this trip, including future explorer Frederick Cook. Okay. He was assigned as the surgeon and he brought Josephine as... This is the cook. Sorry,

surgeon. He brought Josephine as the group's dietician, even though she had zero experience as one. Okay. So Cook was a doctor and Diabitch was the cook. That's correct. Okay. Newspapers attacked Piri for bringing his wife. The trip didn't start well. As the ship they were on was cutting through sheets of ice, these ships iron tillers suddenly spun around and snapped both bones in Piri's lower leg. Oh, shit. So when I said it didn't start well, I really meant it didn't start well. How do you keep going on a mission for iron after iron cuts through your leg? It's a sign. It's that good. It's not a red sign. It's not a red flag at

all, you guys. So they stopped at a camp and built him a building and then he stayed there and recovered for six months. Wait. Okay. Yeah, they built him a little recovery. So he didn't do it. Not okay. Not much for the mission. That's it. The rest of the group would hunt food by boat and introduce and got to know the nearby Inuit people. Okay. Piri began dressing like an Inuit, which he realized based on their last trip that that was the way to go. So they covered themselves in fur. They were basically made a big fur. Right. Okay. The Inuit were curious about the Americans and came to visit the camp. Josephine did not like the way

they smelled. Okay. All right. They did not bathe. Well, that I get the smell thing now. Yeah. It's probably from not bathing. Yep. She was also upset that they had fleas and she did not like what they ate. Okay. So she's not having a good experience. She's not enjoying this at all. Right. Piri's leg was finally good. Where's your mom now? Could she come now for this part? Piri's leg was finally good to go in February, 1892. Yeah. On May 3rd, 1892, he finally headed out on the journey with four men and then fell on a big thing of iron and broke everything. They concluded Greenland was an island. Overall, they traveled 1250

miles. Josephine had a baby while he was on his journey. Wow. Because, you know, what else are you gonna do when you're sitting around on the broken leg? Right? Do it. Okay. It's hot. Stuff's hot. Wait, excuse me. They named her Marie Annigito Piri. She was given an Inuit middle name after an Inuit woman who sewed the baby a tiny first snow suit. Okay. Adorable. Adorable. They returned home having not found the North Pole, however. Piri still yearned for what he really, really wanted, which was fame. During his time with the Inuit, he had learned of the iron tools they used and figured if he could find it that that

would bring him the fame he wanted. By the way, he achieved it. We're talking about him, right? He still wanted to be the first to North Pole, but he figured if he could come back with some discovery, a trophy of any kind, that might work as well. At the time, more explorers were heading to Greenland and trying to find the North Pole. That meant the Inuit were finding people to trade with, which made the iron from their source less crucial. Okay. And that may have been why one very stupid Inuit man brought Piri to see the location of the meteorites on Piri's next expedition in 1894. Nope. To get him to do this,

nope. Piri gave him one gun. Oh, God. Which he later used on himself. Don't tell the white. Piri and the trader Inuit, as in, I'm saying he's a trader. Yes, not an A-I-T-O. Yeah. Traveled for 11 days and 25 miles to get to two small meteorites. The Inuit called them the woman and the dog. I assume that's because the way they were shaped or. Size per, yeah, who knows. Maybe one. One barked. And the other one was like. Those are the conditions. One was maternal. This is the one that raised me and this is my best friend. There was an even larger meteorite on a separate island known as. Grandpa. The tent. The tent. Oh, God. It's got to be

the shape. Unless they were crawling inside that bad boy. We live in here. Each was surrounded by thousands of hammer stones, which the Inuit had brought for hundreds of years to carve the meteorites. This was something that had been a part of the Inuit's lives for generations. I mean, yes, go ahead. Piri decided to take them. Yep. Can you imagine going somewhere and finding a race of people that had relied on something and going, man, I got to get this out of here. It's what, but it's what it's what history, like it's what history is and always will be is the guy who finally just like was like, what if I was a huge

prick? What can I do? That's the worst thing right now. Here we go. You know, I think the problem is that the Inuit have never met a huge asshole. Get it out of here, but our generations. I know. Screw them. I want to be famous. F you. I introduced you to dicks. I'm gonna kill Santa too. Piri headed back to his ship, took it around to where the meteorites were and got to work. The woman was put on an ice flow, which was used to transport it to the ship. That you mean the mother one? Yeah, right. Woman. It's called a woman. Oh, I think it's a mother. No, woman. But halfway there, the ice broke and no, the meteorite was

almost lost to sea. His man had to very quickly pull it to safety from the ice cold water. Can you imagine if they'd just seen that they were like, why is he just what? Just some Inuit sitting on the shore watching it sink going, what's going on? Not knowing that he was gonna take it. Is he just sinking meteorites? But he got it on the ship and off it went to be a spectacle for white people instead of a valuable resource for generations of a race of humans. Well, Dave. He quickly returned the next year and took the smallest meteorite called dog. But the tent was going to be the hardest one. It was more than 11 feet

long. It's a fucking 11 foot long meteorite. And he's taking it. Leave it. It's a meteorite. The base surrounding the island. It's all, I'm not even gonna say it. The base surrounding the island the tent was on was frozen for the majority of the year. So he had a small time window to get in there and steal it. Right. He had to wait until the time was meteorite. That's correct. The first time he tried to steal tent. They could not do it in time in the time they had and the ship started to freeze in the ice. So he had to abandon the attempt. And he waited to the next year. Came back in 1896 again with the goal of stealing the tent. There

was a photographer on this trip. So the entire thing is documented. He also had kept handwritten notes explaining everything. So they had to dislodge the tent and move it 300 feet. Men dragged the huge meteorite with chains wrapped around it. Pulled it over the rocky shore and across snow. They built a short rail bridge from the shore to the ship and pushed the giant rock across. And when it was finally on board, an American flag was draped over the. Like a corpse coming back from war. That's right. Look what we found. That's right. Another thing was saying is ours that was actually somebody else's. Well, that's what I was

going to say. Like what a what what is the in you would response to this? I mean, it can't be great. They have to be livid. Well, I would imagine. But that's the problem. It's like the like like you said, I just you don't understand how somebody could so cavalierly be like, they think they're so fucking superior. What? What? Yeah, they it's us. I mean, I wouldn't. I'd go there and be like, Hey, I like your rock. Yeah, same. Oh, dude, for sure. Picture. Yeah. Can I take a picture? By the way, I said we will be there on the first taking your meteorites, mother fuckers. What's this? Just a volcano? What if there was no show? What did they do?

They actually took a huge meteorite. What? Yeah, it was called tree. And they took it. They're better be elves up there. So, right, so they put an American flag on it and Piri's young daughter, Marie, broke a bottle of wine against the rock. Sorry. Her name with her middle name. Agnito or whatever. Her name is Marie Perry. Marie and Gito Piri. Marie Piri. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. I mean, you know. Sure. So to make things worse, Piri been asked by Franz Boas at the Natural History Museum in New York to bring back one living Inuit. What? Dave. Dave. No, no. We need a thing from the head. Damn it. This I know you shut up. You shut your mouth. Shut your mouth.

We need something special. Shut your mouth. Give me something that I can't get any more. That is what is amazing. Like, now I miss when meteorites were being stolen. Take what? Hey, while you're there, sorry. You know what? Yes, if I wanted something, I do want something. What's that? Bring back one of the humans. Iska, what? You just bring back one. Bring it here and I'm going to look at it. What? Yeah, I'm going to look at its eyes and its ears and then its mouth and then maybe, you know, look at its brain a little. Yeah. No, no, no. They're not humans. So go there and bring one of those humans back. Yeah, a good looking one too. Piri apparently didn't think that one would be enough. So he decided to

take a batch of humans from another place. Oh my God. He could know. He missed a man named Kwisak and his young son Minik. Also a man named Atangana, his wife and his daughter and another guy. Oh, this is a tough one. Named Yusaka Sakak. Yusak Asak. So those six people come with them. We told them all. Okay. They would have, quote, nice warm houses in the sunshine land and guns and knives and needles and many other things. And he's taking them to New York. Yep. Right. Oh, yeah, you're going to love it. Very rustic. Very, very much like here. Super sunny. We can get you guys back to some of your meteorites. Have you heard a Hell's Kitchen? You'll love it. Yeah. The young boy who was traveling with his father,

Minik, his mom had just died, right? So he's with his father alone now. He was just seven years old. Minik's father was told they would just be in New York for one year. Okay, so how did he convince them to come? Well, he had stolen their meteorite. So they were in need of things now. So young Minik would later give his description of what happened, quote, when Mr. Peary came to us 12 years ago, we had never seen a white man. At the start, Peary was kind enough to my people. He made them presence of ornaments, a few knives and guns for hunting and wood to build sled sledges must be sleds. But soon sledges work, but as soon as he was ready to start home, his other work began. Before our eyes, he packed

up the bones of our dead friends and ancestors. So he just starts digging up bodies because he's like, these are gonna be great for the science or scientists to study. Let's just get these days in front of these people, he's digging up the fucking bodies that that guy that gave you the flute. Isn't he digging up grandpa? Yeah, it's not great. It's a. Yeah, that's the guy. Is he a good guy? I don't seem like he's being nice to get up grandma. Why is he laughing? Why is he rolling around in them? I don't know. He's weird. Okay. So the women are crying and the men questioning. He answers that he was taking our dead friends to a warm and pleasant land to bury them. So he's just a fucking. So he's no soul. He's

soulless. Yeah, he's soulless. He's without a soul. Right. Our sole supply of Flint for lighting and iron for hunting and cooking implements was furnished by a huge meteorite. This period put aboard his steamer and took from my poor people who needed it so much. After this, he coached my father and that brave man, Natuka, also called Atangana, who were the strongest hunters and the wisest heads of our tribe to go with them to Africa. So now he's taking the leaders of their of their tribe. Our people were afraid to let them go, but Piri promised that he would. He promised that they should have Natuka and my father back within a year and that with them would come a great stock of guns and

ammunition and wood and metal and presents for all the women and children. We were then crowded into so he is Santa Claus. Yeah. We were then crowned to the hold of a vessel and treated like dogs. Piri seldom came near us. So he just so he completely lies. One man devastated this group. He took their their meteorites that they made tools with. He started taking their bodies, ancestors bodies, then he lies to them and says, I can get you out of this situation that I created when I took the meteorite. And you come you come to New York and then I'll bring you back with a bunch of shit. And then he just takes them. But again, I mean, what is the lesson? Don't talk to the white. Don't talk to the white.

They arrived in Boston in September, 1897, and people were excited Boston from the Boston Post. Dude, you guys look wicked warm. Look at you. Look at these guys. Look at this guy. He doesn't like it when you rub his face like this. Look, he gets so pissed at this guy. Watch when you dump a lager on his head what he does. Nothing. From the Boston Post, quote, Explorer Piri brings a company of Eskimo with him to Boston. When the hope, which is his ship, came up Boston Harbor yesterday morning, a representative of the post was the second person to border. And the first to see the wonderful piece of iron, which is supposed to have dropped from the heavens. Yeah, in another area. Yeah, somewhere else's place.

People came down to the ship to get a look at, quote, the strange cargo on the hope. Well, once on board, their first object was to get a view of the much famed meteorite. And after that, they gave all their attention to the six red faced natives of the Arctic, who made a laughable sight as they ran up and down the deck in the clothes the sailors had given them. Now, why do I think they weren't running up and down the deck by their own will? Because they're slaves, because they've been completely trapped, and they have no I and because there's no way. You're a bummer. There's no way that they're like the excitement. I mean, they just want their meteorite. They literally I think that they're going to get

their meteorite or like gifts, gifts or tools to survive. Yeah. The article said the Inuit were going to be returned to their home in Cape York the next spring. But first to tour, of course, always a tour. The hope was everything went on tour. The hope was next sale to New York and anchored at the Brooklyn Navy Yard on October 2, 1897. There were 20,000 people who paid 25 cents each to climb aboard and see the meteorite with the that's a lot of fucking money back then. Then 100 ton floating crane at the Navy Yard removed the meteorite from the ship and the Inuit were taken to the Natural History Museum. That's not good. At the museum, they're put in shut up. What were they put in damp cellar? Why? What? Yeah,

it's like an igloo, but a brick not at all. Uh, which is not that's not great for people who are from a dry, cold climate. Now, I don't think it's great for any people. Well, but it's even worse for people that are. All right, now you're right. Take it all back. Okay. It really tangled up over there. Yeah, it's going on wire wise with you. Crazy. Okay. All right. Now I feel like I'm Jose the way this microphone. Yeah, you are playing like Jose. Oh, right there. Nope. That's a lump. That's like a seal. That's not a cat. He's very healthy at the museum. He's running sprints. Franz Boas studied the Inuit. How do you study a type of people? So that's what it is. Yeah, because you're not going to study it. You're

not going to learn any cultural stuff because they're so afraid. He's like checking their ears out. Right. He is. Okay. He is doing the ears and the eyes. But this was fascinating balls on the men, aren't they? You know what I mean? Why do you always look at the balls? You know, I say the balls are the door into the soul. So I always grab them and twist them and pull like a doorknob. Kind of balls you have Larry. Okay. But this is New York and the climate was very different than Greenland, a heat wave hit. And combined with their lack of immunity, the immunity to American diseases, they were all sick in a couple of weeks. And they kept getting sick. Oh, God. Within eight months, four were dead from TB. Oh my God,

Dave. Oh, don't. That was a short journey. Oh my God. So they basically came to America, were put in a basement and then died. One of the people who died was Minnick's father. That left just Minnick and US Saga Saga Saga Saga alive. The four dead Inuit were dissected by medical students. What is what is happening? I just sounded like Mr. Belding. I was so astounded. Now, Minnick asked for his father to be buried and both put on a barrel from in Central Park, in which he took a log, put a face mask on it, wrapped it in a sheet and had the barrel done at night with lanterns. Tricking Minnick into thinking that his father was being buried when actually he was being put into the Natural History Museum's collection.

Oh my God. When spring came, US Saga Saga returned to Greenland, but Minnick was left behind all alone. And he he's just now who's making that decision? I don't I don't understand why that guy didn't take him back. But maybe they didn't let him. I mean, I would imagine that guy wanted to take the kid back. There had to be a thing where they're like, No, you can go but the kid stays. Also, he's fucking seven or eight now. So if you lose both your parents before you're seven, it's a nightmare. But losing unless you're Batman, unless you're Batman, then it sets off a great, a great path still tortured, but better path, right, then you're just a super rich guy beating up poor people. But this kid's like eight and

he's alone in a new fucking world. Like it's crazy. Not only a new it's not even a new exciting world. It's a new terrifying world. Yeah. So a man. So Piri just bails once he's just out of the picture. Cool guy, though. Good to good to meet him. Yeah. A man named William Wallace. There's no bloody way. What you've done to these children and these other bloody innuets. He was the superintendent of the museum. Go and you may live. Stay your mate day. But know that from this day forward, every day you live from then until now and now until then. Well, but you're right. You see, well, yeah, got a lot of mucus. You're right. You're what? It's hot. It's hot. He's bloody. Yeah. Look, I've been kept down here

as well in the cellar. I don't know what to tell you. I'm part of the exhibit myself. Yeah. No, I don't know what to. Okay. Yeah. Are you a ghost? I don't know anymore exactly what I am to be completely honest with you. Say something weird about Jews. You can't make movies anymore. Well, look, listen, you live in the museum long enough. You'll hate Jews. Okay. That's the bottom bloody line. Right. Honestly, you'll get used to that. My best friend's a dinosaur. Did you know that? Yeah, best friends. My best friend is a triceratops. Yeah. Absolutely inseparable we are. Have you seen Jumanji? I've seen Night of the Bloody Museum, mate. Yeah, I think you think you think you think you're similar

similar similar. All right, Jumanji is the game. By the way, America, I do not like Jew. Oh, man. Okay. I didn't know. Not okay. So William Wallace is a superintendent of the museum adopts young Minnick. His wife brought Minnick to their home to live with them and their son in the Bronx. Minnick took their took their last name. And they loved him. They treated him awesome. Okay, which is a good thing. The only thing in the story. But being the only Inuit in New York, he was very isolated even though the family treated him well. So he's obviously like you're a fucking one of a kind. Yeah, one just a dick to you. Yeah, another like, how do you like your waffles, Minnick? Minnick's Minnick's

being distant again. We fish for breakfast. Oh, God, he wants more fish. Minnick, there'll be no more fish. Syrup, Syrup, Syrup. Oh, here we go. He's having one of his tantrums. Get the ice. Piri continued to make expeditions to find the North Pole in 1901. Word came that he was lost in the Arctic. Good. Piri's family and supporters reached out to Fred Rick Cook for help. Cook at this point. Cook was a explorer on his own. Okay. Cook sailed north on a rescue ship found Piri and treated him for ailments ranging from scurvy to heart problems. What about a heart? Was he able to put one of those in? Not have one. That was the problem. Next Piri was given $50,000 in funding by the Crocker family, who were

rich from banking, in 1905. On that expedition, he claimed he made it furthest north. So that's like a big deal to make it. He's gone the furthest anyone's ever gone north there, right? He also said he had discovered a previously undiscovered piece of land, which he named Crocker Land. Okay. So he's, he's, and that's the company, right? That fronted him, right? Later, when his diary was reviewed, it was discovered on the same day he said he found Crocker Land that he wrote on the diary, quote, no land visible was also discovered to make his furthest north claim he would have had to have traveled 133 kilometers between sleeping. And that would have been in a direct line with no detours. But a lot, I mean, okay, devil's advocate,

a lot of explorers suffered from sleep running. The nerves of being in this environment would get, you know, that's fair, that would get them up and they would, I'm some of them, but one guy climbed Everest in a cold sleep. They didn't even know it, woke up. He's like, I didn't know that. Whoa, he almost fell. He was so astounded. Only National Geographic magazine certified Piri's furthest honor, and it was not a scientific magazine at the time. A future expedition would determine that Crocker Land did not exist. So, okay, that is a bit of a liar. That is a great advantage, though, in the idea of being the first. Yeah, no, I did it. Oh, yeah. No, I went super far. What's the furthest someone went? I was way

past that. Oh, yeah, I got a whole area called Crocker Land. I'm your guy. You can trust me. But in 1906, New York Papers published a story that said that Minnick's father's skeleton was displayed in the museum. Minnick learned through classmates teasing him that this is what it become of his father and that the barrel he had, but barrel had been a fake. I mean, that is like that as like a kid. How do you, your daddy's on a display like, I don't know how that goes. I mean, on a window. Yeah, well, yeah, no, you're like, D I S P A L Y. Your daddy's an Inuit and he did die. But that that truly is as far as like, you know, I think when like when I think back to being a kid, like, you know, there's everybody

gets picked on and you pick on people and like it's very it is really like vicious. That's why like a lot of times when you hear like, you know, the stuff that's going on now to me like one of the harder things to hear is the idea that that at school, you know, kids are mocking Mexican kids about how their parents are going to have to go. And like, so as a kid, when you hear something like that, you just have no defense because you just are so afraid. So I mean, amplify that if kids are mocking that your dad's bones are on display in a goddamn museum. Ah, Minic was interviewed by newspaper quote, Hey, Minic, how do you feel about your dad's

bones being a glass? I can never be happy till I can bury my father in a grave. It makes me every cry every time I think it was poor bones up there in the museum in a glass case where everybody can look at them. Just because I am a poor Eskimo boy, why can't I bury my father in a grave the way he would want to be buried? So as he also, I was pretty sure the body was in Central Park. Also, I heard turns out he's a lot bigger and less like a log than I remember. As he grew up in the Bronx, Minic caught pneumonia repeatedly, but he still managed to excel at baseball. It's not that much.

He eventually went to Manhattan College in 1909, but he didn't last long. He wanted to study civil engineering, but quit because, quote, he felt like a freak to those about him. He also fought to get his father's skeleton back, wanting to give him a proper burial as per his people's traditions. But the director of the way, there's not a lot of people whose tradition is to put the person in glass. The director of the museum would not acknowledge that the museum had the skeleton. He eventually got, I mean, that is our political process of play. He eventually got the period Arctic Club to pay for his passage back to Greenland.

Wow, there's a little bit more. Otherwise, period basically moved on. So when he was around 18 years old, wait, sorry, this is a mistake. Okay, so so he's interviewed when he's around 18 years old, and he hasn't seen his people or the islands since he was seven. He wants to go back to Greenland. And he's interviewed by a reporter and he says, quote, your race of scientific criminals, I know I'll never get my father's bones out of the American Museum of Natural History. I am glad enough to get away before they grab my brains and stuff them into a jar. Wow. So he's a little he seems and I mean, look, I'll be honest, a little negative, a little negative, the best your situation, a little negative.

How about the glass case that contains your father is half full. Thank you. Okay. It's a half it's a half full display. Thank you. The same year Minnick wanted to head back to Greenland. Perry was also once again, going back to Greenland, looking for funding for a new expedition, still trying to find the first still trying to be the first man to reach the north. I do. I do hope that this piece of garbage never makes it to the north pole. And an examiner story Minnick explained why he wanted to leave. I felt that I must go north back to Greenland somehow some way. I am a burden on my friends and I see clearly that as long as I live, they will have me a weight upon their hands helping me always.

I can never forgive Perry. And I hope to see him to show him the wreck he has caused. I have lost hope. I lost it when Perry refused to take me with him this last trip. And I have given up believing your Christian creed that you taught me was meant for one at all Christian and savage alike. I gave that up finally when Professor Bumpus at the museum told me the last time I cannot have my father's bones to bury them. Where's your Christianity? My own people are kinder and better and more human and I am going back to them. My land is frozen and desolate, but we can bury our dead there. What has your civilization done to my people and me but harm us? We are now tens when we were thousands and what is left

is dying fast through your work. Is that your whole quote? T-shirts, do you like them or are they weird for you? There's two things there. He goes back to Greenland. One account I couldn't figure out which one is real was that he got the Perry Arctic Club to pay for his passage. But another one, a guy who wrote a book said that Perry had a secret that Minnick knew. Piss tape? Perry, when he had been going up to Greenland, had been having an affair with an Inuit woman. Okay. Well, sort of a woman when they started having sex, she was just 14. Oh, God, this guy. Come on, something. Do something right. And he fathered two children with her. The last thing Perry needed was more bad press. So he agreed to take Minnick

back to Greenland. So those are the two ways. What is the ride? How long is the ride? The thing that gives this credence is that there are relatives of his. So Minnick is now 18 and he gets back to Greenland and he discovers that he's now a stranger to his people at his homeland. Grown up in the Bronx. He'd forgotten his native language. You guys don't know what a yo yo is. Oh boy, this is going to be super awkward. I'm talking about stick ball. Come on. Come on, you guys. Come on, guys. Well, come on. No, just draw a circle in the snow. We're going to play marbles as a fucking subway. Come on. So Hey, do you think if we cut that seal open, we can get some hot dogs? I really didn't miss being

here as much as I thought. So he relearned his language, not a hunt, but he started to miss the hustle and bustle of the city that he thought to load in. He was basically a man trapped between two worlds, completely uncomfortable in both worlds. Like a mermaid. That of a mermaid. That the plight of a mermaid. I thought so. Piri's 1909 expedition. He set off with 23 men and they arrived before winter and camped. Piri, you know, he meets his lady. Right. It's 14 year old. Oh, God. The way the expedition worked is Piri would leave men at camps and then move forward with less ban, right? So the leaving guys. So you can come back and those guys are waiting for you, right? Right. And so at the last camp,

he left the only guy who could record navigation and he just headed out with five assistants. He then claimed he made it to the North Pole, though he would not show any of the assistance, the readings on his instruments. Piri put an American flag with a diagonal stripe on it with a note in an empty tin and buried it in the ice. And then they turned around to return. Now, upon returning to Cape York, Piri was told that Frederick Cook was heading back to Copenhagen, claiming he had reached the North Pole first. Piri was in a fury. He ordered a ship to speed to the closest wiring station where he wired New York with the New York Times and said he had reached the North Pole. Oh, God. The time. I mean,

that's essentially a tweet. Yeah. The Times had helped him fund the expedition. So they were. Yeah. So. Piri then sailed to Nova Scotia. Now, the same day that he arrived in Nova Scotia, Cook arrived in New York and there were thousands of people lining the streets for the hero, Frederick Cook, who had discovered. Oh, yes. The New York Herald front page headline was the North Pole is discovered by Dr. Frederick A. Cook. Cook said, told the press that he would give up his diaries and information to the press to verify that he had made it to the North Pole. He also said he had deposited a note in a brass tube at the North Pole, which he buried in a crevice. His return journey had been brutal. And at one point they had

to camp in a cave for months waiting for the sea ice to harden. He just had to wait for all of his possessions to arrive and all would be verified. But then Cook received a wire. Sorry. Can I ask one thing? How how like. So the verification process of someone actually arriving to a place like this is what is in the diary? Like, well, it's almost like if I were to be like, Dave, I found a monster called the Flurfenfagen. And you're like, what is it? And I'm like, dad, it's this purple thing with four eyes, eight arms, and every time it jumps it burps. So you mean like Crockerland? Yeah, it's kind of like Crockerland. Yeah. But I mean like you. So you. All right, well, we'll see. Okay, let's listen. Let's listen.

So let's both of us just listen a little bit. Cook just has to wait for all his possessions to arrive and then all will be verified. But then Cook received a wire. His supplies were supposed to be coming back on a ship, but he gets word that they're not coming. See, Cook had been forced to make a decision on his way back, because one of his assistants had become ill to make to make the final leg of his journey. He left many of his possessions with an American named Henry Whitney, who was on a sporting trip in the Arctic. He's a hunter. Whitney said he would bring back all of Cook's stuff. So Cook left his meteorological data, expedition records, but he took his diary and he left. The ship that arrived to

bring Whitney back was Peary's ship. Oh, God. Peary had not yet told anyone he had made it to the North Pole. And when he heard about Cook, he interrogated the Cook's Inuit assistants. So he takes these guys alone onto the ship and interrogates them. And then Peary refused to allow any of Cook's possessions on his ship. Whitney then hid Cook's possessions among some large rocks near the shoreline and left on the ship. Oh, wow. Back in New York, Cook learned that Peary had not allowed his possessions on board. Cook was, quote, seized by heart sickness. Peary then sent a note to the New York Times saying, quote, don't let the Cook story were you have him nailed. Oh, okay. The New York Times front

page exactly one week after the Herald front page, it said, Cook and discovered the North Pole. Oh, God. Read, Peary discovers North Pole after eight trials in 23 years. Now, naturally, the country was excited by the two claims. Wait, in the way that they like beef? Oh, holy shit. So they like, it's our Springer mentality at play again. East Coast, West Coast wrap. Right, right, right. Okay, right. No, Biggie found it. The two men then battled over who had reached the pole first in the press. Poles were taken and people believe North Poles, people believe Cook had done it by a wide margin. Okay. But

as the months passed, Peary ran a campaign against Cook. This is insane, by the way, which was backed by the men with much greater financial weight. And it began to pick up momentum. So, so, so, no, you I'm going to show you. So, so he, so now he is running a sort of posthumous campaign about how he, yeah, he's saying he made it to the North Pole and he's running a, he's running a, he's running a, but after, this is the most American thing he's ever done. Oh, my God. The most American explorer of all time. Oh, God, all of Cook's, all of Cook's previous accomplishments began to be attacked, like his previous client of Mount McKinley, a blacksmith who, who had accompanied Cook on

that journey and had written his, you know, his witnessings, Conger Mount journey suddenly changed his story, saying Cook had not reached the top. Then the men who accompanied Cook on his journey to the North Pole began, Paul began to change their stories. Then the National Geographic Society, which had long supported Peary's work and given him money for his expeditions, appointed a three-man committee to examine Peary's data. One member was a friend of Peary's. Another was head of the U.S. Coast and Geonics Survey, to which Peary had beneficially assigned for his final expedition. And the third had been quoted in the New York Times as a skeptic on the question of the discovery of the pole by Cook. Now, amazingly, a month later, these

three men announced Peary, Peary reached the North Pole. So, meanwhile, Cook canceled the tour because of depression and laryngitis. Oh, God. He also sent a report to the University of Copenhagen, but did not want to send his original diary because he didn't trust that it would not be lost. Oh, God. He's really. The university was expecting the original diary. So, they announced that his journey could not be proven. So, everything has fallen apart. The public took this meaning that it had been proved he was lying. Right. Not that they just hadn't gotten the information. Sure. And the press was now coming around to Peary's side. Now, one of the papers wrote that the blacksmith had been paid off. Like, they found

proof that the blacksmith had been paid off to lie. It is very similar to how scandal works nowadays, too. Yeah. And that like, it's like, it takes, you know, one thing happens and then four other things that you already had already sort of happened come out and then mistresses and then someone else who says that this happened and, you know, you know, like the girl in Colorado that Kobe. So, yeah, attack the victim. So, the press is coming around. Cook's instruments and records that Peary left behind in Greenland were never found, but he had his diary. In 1911, he appeared before the Naval Affairs Subcommittee in Congress to get recognition as the discoverer of the North Pole. But the

committee was suspicious of the good condition of his diary, wondering how he could handle greasy food and not get smudge marks on it. That's just... Why is this not filthy, sir? No, no, I think if you actually open it up, you'll see the evidence in there is very, very clear. I can't even eat Liberty cabbage in the morning without getting it all over my suit. Well, I do not want to get into... Look at my hats. Are they filthy? No. Yes, they are. Okay, they are filthy. dirty grime. You know why? Why? I was eating and walking about. I really, I think if you look, if you open some of the pages, if you wipe off your filthy hand and you open some

of the pages, you'll see that there is... Well, so what? I'm not a filthy eater. Open... What is your problem? Sir. Open the thing. Sir, how are you not a filthy eater? I don't, I don't eat over my diary. I would do it separately. I would compartmentalize. If you open, if you open the damn thing. Oh my God. So the subcommittee approved a bill honoring Peary by a vote of 4-2-3. The minority voters had quote, deep rooted doubts about Peary's claim. A bill was passed by Congress and President Taft signed it, crediting Peary with being the only one to find the North Bowl. Well, if you're trying to convince a president about a diary not getting food on it, Taft

is not your man. It's the wrong president. Good. Well done. Thank you, sir. Peary never again showed his polar diary, field papers, or other data. Yeah, he became bipolar. Minnick, meanwhile, left Greenland in 1916 and returned to New York. Part of this was to continue his goal of getting back his father's remains. He tried and continued to fail. The museum said it knew nothing about the bones and told employees to deny that they were there. Through an intermediary, he petitioned President Theodore Roosevelt to get back the remains, but Peary persuaded them to pass. Good man. And because he was an Inuit, he had a hard time finding work. He then moved

to New Hampshire, became a lumberjack, and lived on a farm with a friend. It was said these were the happiest days of his life, which came to a swift end. In 1918, the Spanish flu was ripping through the world, killing men and women who were the same age as Minnick. He succumbed to the flu at 28 and was buried in New Hampshire. At least they didn't put him on display. Yeah. None of the Inuit remains have ever been supposedly, none of the Inuit remains have ever been displayed at the American Museum of Natural History, according to them. Yeah, but according to them, they've never displayed them. But they're there. There were once artifacts from expeditions like Peary's, but that display is gone. Just

the meteorite remains. It was sold to the museum in 1904 for $40,000 and pulled on a cart by a herd of 28 horses from Brooklyn to the Upper West Side. But think of how people lie in the streets to watch the thing that helps us stay in a group of people in a faraway land and now reduced to a spectacle. I mean, literally what I was just going to say, it's so, yeah, it's like the, I mean, it's, nobody's even, it's just what a waste. What an absolute, like it's, I mean, to not have the moral fiber to know that like stealing something that a population thrives on, you know, that's already like a little incomprehensible. But the idea that you're not bringing that back to do anything. Yeah, no, it's just the sick coffee table.

You seem upset. Yeah, I'm a little upset. All right, so. Cook went into the oil business in Texas. So now he is, everyone thinks he's a liar. Right. Yes. So he goes into the oil business in Texas. In 1923, he was indicted on mail fraud charges related to the price of the stock in his company. Okay. His trial had 283 witnesses, 283, including a bank examiner, who all testified his books were in good order. Okay. And then he was convicted. Oh, gosh, the judge said while he was being sentenced, quote, you have at last got to the point where you can't bunco anybody. So he, but he's done nothing. Like he's he like did, he did right. He's done nothing. He did right. He found Santa

done absolutely nothing. And he said, Well, finally, now we got you. Come up and you should have brought back in health. So he was given 14 years and nine months. Oh, my God. He was pro the 1930 and eventually pardoned by FDR in 1940. Now, Piri, who at this point is a hero, right? Yeah, for sure. He died in 1920, which I wish it happened sooner. Well, I don't know. Right, Santa alone in that. Wait, what did he die of? Died in 1920 in Washington, DC. Yeah, again, I think he just lived to a happy old age, which is great. Oh, good. And he, you know, he was a celebrity. Where are his bones on display? Far Castle. Oh, yeah, that's a great place. Now, Cook, actually, his, his oil company actually was on land

that became the biggest oil find in North America. So he when he got out of prison, he was loaded. But I don't believe that that was his, though, because there were no ketchup stains on any of the oil wells. So he's pro 1930 and pardoned in 1940 by FDR. Okay. Okay. The undisputed the first undisputed trek to the North Pole was made in 1968 on Snowmobile. Other explorers have made the trek and all confirm Cook's original descriptions of the area, the polar sea, the ice islands and the westward drift of the polar ice. So yeah, well, Minix, I guess we all hit that dead man in apology, don't we? Minix father's remains were finally returned to Greenland and buried in 1993. The plaque right on time. Just how we

like to do it. The plaque in the church cemetery says they have come home. But Museum of Natural History would not publicly acknowledge that the bones were returned. Hundreds of Aboriginal skeletons are stored in American museums all over America. God, it's so that's just so messed up. What's wrong with keeping people in a basement and letting them die? Well, that like that, you know, I mean, again, it's like you like the mentality of taking ownership over other lives. Like when I think about what really is like the best version of how society can be, it's a version where nobody bothers you just nobody bothers anybody. Like you're just you're able to just sort of like do your thing

like you can you can be your sexual orientation can be whatever you can be whatever color. It just it doesn't matter. Like if you're crazy, we'll try to deal with you. Like if you're a criminal, we'll figure. But as far as like the general like you just can't you can't take humans. But there's clearly, you know, a lot of people are very good and would go there and trade with them and be like, Hey, how you guys doing? But it just takes a small that's the problem of people to it's the problem. That's the very small percentage. And the problem is that we are run by a small percentage. I mean, we're run, we're run, we're run by a small percentage of people. We're run by a small percentage of people

who have our best interests not at heart. This is whatever political party. They don't right. So they they don't and here, here we sit going, I can't believe this. I really want to go to Norway, Sweden, check out how they live up there keeps. Let me tell you, really super good. Let me tell you, it's taken over my Facebook feed, how they live in Sweden in Denmark. Every two days, it's something else. They're like, they've invented a road where it's all they've invented a solar powered highway. Yeah. This car will have sex with you. That was the thing they had in Sweden. The bank car. It has a dream. We signed bank cars. We signed bank cars.