The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 67 - Dogs Bummer and Lazarus

Episode Date: March 18, 2015

Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the two dogs, Bummer and Lazarus.SOURCESTOUR DATESREDBUBBLE MERCHPATREON

When you're staying at an Airbnb you might be like me wondering could my place be an Airbnb and if it could what could it earn? You could be sitting on an Airbnb and not even know it. That in-law sweet guest house where your parents stay only part-time Airbnb it and make some money the rest of the year whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for something a little more fun your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca slash host you are listening to the dollop an American History podcast each week I Dave Anthony read a story to my friend

Gareth Reynolds who has no real idea what this topic is about. Not Gary Gareth. Dave okay someone or something is tickling people. Is it for fun? And this is not gonna come to tickle you quad cat. Okay. You are queen fakie of eight uptown. All hell queen shit of Liesville. A bunch of religious virgins go to mingle and do what Frank? Oh my God. No. I see you done my friend. No. Sometime in the 1860s in San Francisco well first oh let's just say that San Francisco along with most other cities in the United States at the time had a problem with wild dogs. Well I think that's a fair thing to say first. In Los Angeles in the 1840s dogs outnumber people by nearly two to one. I don't know

what that was like. That's crazy. Two to one dog. Two to one dog ratio. And while the situation in San Francisco. Like a Pixar movie. You know it's terrible. No I don't think it was anything near that cute and fun. These are wild dogs. Wild fucking dogs. Eating people. Eating people. I think so. I think so. People could defend themselves against dogs. The situation in San Francisco had not reached the extreme of two to one. The large numbers of strays and feral dogs did cause problems. Yeah they're not pets. I mean some are pets but most of these are fucking wild animals. Still I think with with the right weaponry I could defend

myself against two dogs per me. Dogs are regularly poisoned. Not that I want to turn this into a dog war. Alright look we believe. I love animals. Everybody listening believes that you could you could handle yourself against two dogs. Bring on these fucking dogs. Dogs are regularly poisoned or trapped and killed. Nevertheless if a dog turned out to be a good rat or distinguished itself in some other way it was still possible for it to survive. Just really took me right back to the dollop where people would just have rat shows basically. Well yeah. Bummer was a black and white newfoundland who had established himself

outside the saloon of Frederick Martin in 1860 and quickly proved to be an exceptional rat killer. His ratting talent spared him the fate of the previous dog who had lived on the territory Bruno who had been poisoned with strychnine. Oh god. Terrible. You're not doing a good job Bruno. You're fired. Here have this bowl of food. That means you're dead. Described as quote bull in his fighting quarters and newfoundland in his vital parts. He wandered up and yeah I think that they just said he was like it was like a bull in his fighting quarters and then in the other parts like his balls and his penis and balls

I mean if that's what we consider vital parts but maybe also they mean heart. Okay. But probably penis and balls. It feels like they yeah it feels dirty. You got to see this dog's dick. This dog's got a beautiful penis. No it's like what's her name and it was a slissinger comedy special. He wandered up and down the east side of Montgomery Street the town's main stem begging food from restaurants and bars which is what sounds like a dog which is what earned him the nickname bummer. Okay because he always wanted to bum. But where are the other dogs just not hip to the idea that they should beg for

shit? I don't know if they knew. Because I think dogs in this day and age pretty much all they do is go like can I can I have that? The young city was filled with stray dogs and bummer would probably have been destined for obscurity had an event not occurred that made him the talk of the town. Here we go. On January 18th 16 1861 the Alta California reported three or four days ago a poor lean mangy Kerr was attacked in the street by a larger dog and was getting unmercifully walloped when bummers are being aroused at the unequal con contest he rushed in and gave the attacking canine such a rough handling that he was

glad to quit the field. I like it. I like this. Yep. The poor Kerr had one of its legs half bitten through and having limped upon the sidewalk he proceeded to scrape an acquaintance with his deliverer bummer who thenceforth took him under his special protection. Every night since then the two dogs have slept coiled up together close to some doorway bummer always giving the lame Kerr the inside booth and trying to keep him as warm as possible. That's nice. That's very nice. That's how a couple of friends met. This is like the beginning of Bush Cassidy Sundance kid. Sure. Hopefully they're dogs. Yeah. Okay. This dog was

badly injured and was not expected to live. Bummer coaxed him to eat brought back scraps from his scavenging missions and huddled next to him to keep him warm during the night. The injured dog quickly recovered and within days was following bummer as he made his begging rounds in the streets. His remarkable recovery earned him the name Lazarus. Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. All right. And he put her in last. Yeah. And he proved to be even more prodigious rather than bummer. The San Francisco Bulletin of October 3 1863 reported the town rings today with stories of their prowess in this line claiming that they had killed

400 rats when a fruit market was overhauled. Can you imagine like being a reporter being like wait what's the story that I got to cover. You're going to talk about dogs killing rats today Johnny. Okay. Because they're they're tearing up a fruit market. It's gonna be rats galore get down there with those dogs. The people love this dog storyline. Tell us what they do. And then to be a reader like oh that's fascinating story. Get your paper today 400 rats killed down at the fruit market. I'll take one of those. My God. What a fascinating article. Holy dog. They disposed of 85 rats in 20 minutes at

another business. Whoa. That's a lot of rats. 20 minutes. Yeah. Also your business is terrible. Not a restaurant the paper reassured 85. That's what so three. What is that. It's like three a minute right. Well or four. Four a round. It's like three. Yeah it is like three. And then it's four a little over four. It's actually it's like four more than it's like three if you think about it. So below we're bummer Lazarus that the board of supervisors exempted them from a stray dog ordinance that allowed the board of supervisors. Yeah. This is really like heavy into the culture. These are superstars. They exempted. It's just a

pleasure to meet you. May I shake your paw. They they exempted them from a stray dog ordinance that allowed all unclaimed dogs to be executed. It's a heavy word. Yeah. According to the Alta as the supervisors were deliberating the two dogs lay crouched at the doorway apparently eager to hear what was being said and done for their benefit. Now I don't believe that. I mean that's definitely a little a little little liberty taken there. I would guess someone brought the dogs down. Pretend you're listening. Well the noble hearted bummer was the subject of unalloyed love and admiration. Lazarus possessed a

more vacillating and selfish character. Neither dog was a beauty prize winner. Lazarus who who some claimed was the oldest dog in town was described as a scrawny insignificant mutt of yellowish black color. A cross between a kerr and a hound with a dash of the terrier that was not developed until he went into partnership with bummer. But their friendship touched the hearts of everyone who saw them. Look at those two dogs together. That's marvelous. You know that's Lazarus the oldest dog in town. We've done our homework. The ratting talent and unique bond was seized upon by the city's press. Martin here's where you'll

start to understand what's happening. Martin Saloon was a favorite haunt of newspaper men and journalists. So with the dogs a fixture outside the bar they never had to they never had to travel far for a story. So it's just a lazy reporting. It's just the shitty drunken reporters who didn't want to go anywhere and they'd be like. We're supposed to do a story today. Oh shit where's this dogs. Another story on the dogs. These are rat killers and then their buddies. Yeah but you've already wrote about that. They're pals. I think you have a drinking problem. One is super old. The editors like Jesus another one about the

two dogs. Kind of selfish. Many times you've got to write the same article about these two dogs. They're different. This one they look through each other funny. Yeah I get it they like each other. They're two dogs. One of them's really old. They're like I don't like brass. Yeah I know they don't like what the fuck is your problem. Where's the money you owe me. I like their buddies. I know I like their buddies. Done this before. The exploits of the dogs are recorded in detail in the California California in the daily out to California the morning daily called the daily evening bulletin. The editors vying each other and their attempts to

endow the pair's adventures with thrills and parallels to the human conditions. Good God. The dogs even appeared in a stage burletta titled The Life in San Francisco. A burletta is like a mini like Italian opera. But what how is that possible. Well they probably just had him come out. I don't think they actually spoke. I don't believe that the dogs sang. But they probably. You know you've heard the expression it's not over till the hairy dog sings. Well okay so they made they made a burletta about San Francisco and then they're gonna have the dogs in it so I won't put the dogs. Oh my God that's Lazarus and bummer. Oh there they are. They really like each other and they hate rats. Wait a minute Lazarus is singing.

Bummer is portrayed as the gentleman down on his luck yet still faithful and conscientious. While Lazarus the mongrel was cast in the role of the sly and self-serving fair weathered friend. When bummer was shot in the leg after only a couple of months and Lazarus left him to run with another dog it suited the pressed no end. Because they got a controversy. Well bummer took Lazarus other wing and healed him and help Dave Dave. And then when bummer got shot Dave. Also why is bummer getting shot Dave Dave what fair question right off the bat why is bummer getting shot. But also what's happening with the reporters. Well now they're

just giving these dogs like they're like the Kardashians like who like man just when I thought this plot couldn't thicken anymore Lazarus goes and leaves bummer. There's a lot of backstory with these dogs. A lot of backstory. Bummer was said to be feeling the sting of ingratitude at the desertion of Lazarus. Who'd be based on a human's eyeball. You could see that he was upset. Not because he was shot he missed his friend. Lazarus. Lied from outside of the bar. Lazarus's return when bummer recovered only added to the excitement. Oh my god a reunion episode. We're back together. Oh my god. Burlata too. The two dogs had the run of

the streets and when on June 14th 1862 Lazarus was taken by a new dog catcher a mob of angry citizens demanded his release petitioning to have the pair declared city property so they could wander the streets unmolested. Wow. City supervisors released Lazarus and declared he and bummer exempt from the city ordinance. Jesus. A week later the two were reported to have stopped a runaway horse. Sure. That's just a weird sentence to throw in there. Yeah yeah they stopped a runaway horse whatever bummer Lazarus back together again. Despite their reputations the two could be vicious. Bummer was a sheep killer and

regularly fought other dogs in the street occasionally assisted by Lazarus. Although normally Lazarus would restrict himself to barking encouragement. They also ransacked shops. I'd be definitely be the Lazarus of the dogs. Yeah fuck that dog up. Chill. They also ransacked shops when they had entered unnoticed and been locked in by the owners. So they're dogs. Despite all of the attempts to paint them as people. They're actually dogs. With like the odd couple. Yeah. They're actually just dogs. And who do you respond more to? Who do you think you are more of a Lazarus or a bummer? I think I'm more of a bummer. And I'm more of a Lazarus. That's why we

hang out. We're totally bummer Lazarus. I can't believe bummer got got into a fight today and then got locked in a meat shop. It's crazy. You know I'm starting to think he might be a dog. Bummer Lazarus were even left complimentary tickets for every theatrical performance that opened in San Francisco. Hey Dave. I gotta go. I gotta go. To 1880. It took from when to when? In 1855 to 1880 in the first row of the balcony. Well that seems like I might have misprinted something but that's a long time. What are these? They found the fountain of dog youth. I had to. I had to make a mistake. For 25 years we left tickets for these

dogs. Well they couldn't be because one's gonna die soon. It must have been 1860. Well thanks for the foreshadowing. It was a custom. Well it was the next sentence. It was a custom. Let me guess one of them dies. It was a custom that held until that tragic day when the beloved Mongrel Lazarus died. He was killed in October 1863. Accounts say he was poisoned by be given meat laced with rat bane after biting a boy. The San Francisco's put up a $50 reward for the capture of the poisoner. Wow. Some wanted Lazarus to be buried in a place of honor alongside other great men of the city. Others wanted to be normal

humans. Others wanted priorities checked. Notable San Francisco's formed a procession and bummer looked on warmfully. This led to a rumor that large numbers of San Franciscans turned out for Lazarus' funeral but the dog was not buried. He was actually stuffed by a taxidermist. And we all know how good taxidermy was back then. And yeah and displayed behind the bar in Martin's Saloon. It was reported that Martin paid the taxidermist $50 to turn the dog over even though its remains had already been claimed by the City Council. The Daily Evening Bulletin. The City Council. Yeah everyone. Give us the

innards. We'll just have we'll just have this dead dog here on the table every time we have a meeting. Yeah there we go. You want to say it to me you say it to Lazarus and me. Just I'd rather um not say it at all. Okay then we are adjourned. Thank fucking God. Lazarus does not like you sir. Yeah well he's a stuffed fucking dog. Excuse me. I'm out of here. That's my wife. The evening the Daily Evening Bulletin featured a long obituary entitled Lament for Lazarus in which they praised the virtues of both dogs and recounted their various adventures together. Sure. In the in 1950s Samuel Dixon's book San Francisco Kaleidoscope offered a

different version of the death of Lazarus. In October of 1863 a fire ravaged in the city. Though the streets came through the streets came rowing the brave men of the volunteer fire companies the St. Francis Hook and Ladder, the Columbia 11, the Nicarbaca 5, and the Washington Hoes. One of the trucks ran over and killed Lazarus. It was not known which truck it was although each company sorrowfully claimed credit. Bummer continued alone. Although Mark Twain reported a year later in the Daily Morning Call that he had taken a small black puppy under his wing. A new intern.

Sure. Nothing more was heard of the puppy and without his companion Lazarus Bummer was less of an interest to the press. Of course well I mean look you know they were a duo. The press knew that going into it. It's hard to come down. You know you have your show on the air and then your show goes away. Yeah you know. Next thing you know there's a new bummer, new Lazarus. Yeah where's Maury Povich now. Thank you. Thank you. It was said the grieving bummer rarely left the area where Lazarus died. His final two years after the death of his friend were sad ones. In 1865 a drunk Henry Rippy. I swear to God for a minute I

thought that you were about to suggest that the dog had a drinking problem. Well he might have. He was sad. Give me another one. It's like an old Scotch. Lazarus. I've hit rock bottom. I miss my little yellow and black friend. This black elaborate shit. Nothing against you. I'd say about the time we stopped the runaway horse. Yeah yeah you actually told him about 15 minutes ago. We killed some sheep together. Okay. I found him in the rose. Do you have any money? Fight with another dog. All right okay. And I took him over the sidewalk. Do you want some water? Water my dew. Water my dew. In 1865 a drunk Henry Rippy kicked him down

a staircase on Montgomery Street. Bummer died two months later. That's a long time to be from kicked to died. Bummer was still popular enough that to avoid violence by a vigilance committee the city immediately arrested Rippy. Wow that is great though. I wish they did that now. Okay so just to sum up a bunch of guys are gonna kill the drunk because he kicked the dog. Listen. They died two months later. Probably not from the kick because it was two months later. I hate to say that I'm on the side of the vigilantes but I'm on the side of the vigilantes. Fair. I would I would I'm sorry I'm really emotional

right now. Yeah you sound you okay. But Rippy did not completely escape street justice as upon learning of his crime Rippy's cellmate a vendor named David Popley. Oh boy. Popped Rippy in the Smeller quote. Popped Rippy in the Smeller. Well I'm not gonna I'm a little I might need some clarity because Smellers a nose or a foot. Okay because I just want you to know that could go to a darker place. Bummer's passing did not make the headlines in the same way that Lazarus death had. But cartoonist jump created a new cartoon showing him lying in a state while Lazarus tucked into a table of food in the ether above him. And

all the morons rejoiced with closure. And rats paid their respects. Oh god. Rats the things that they've killed. Yeah but you know how they are. Fucking the slot. It would be like that's like the Jews sitting around paying their respects to Hitler. But to be fair this is a cartoon. True. Yeah so it didn't happen. These goddamn Jews. A young reporter named Mark Twain produced a snide eulogy for bummer in the Virginia City Enterprise which was repainted in the Californian on the 11th of November 19 1865. The old vagrant bummer is really dead at last although he was always more respected than his ubiquitous vessel

the dog Lazarus. His exit has not made half as much stir in the newspaper world as signalized the departure of the latter. I think it is because he died a natural death. Died with friends around him to soothe his pillow and wipe the death damps from his brow and receive his last words of love and resignation. Because he died full of years and honor and disease and fleas. He was permitted to die a natural death as I have said but poor Lazarus died with his boots on which is to say he lost his life by violence. He gave up the ghost mysteriously mysteriously at dead of night with none to cheer his

last moments or soothe his dying pains. So the murdered dog was canonized in the newspapers his shortcomings excused and his virtues heralded to the world but his superior parting with his life in the fullness of time and in the due course of nature sinks as quietly as might the mangiest cur among us. Well let him go in the earlier days he was courted in crest but laterally he has lost his comeliness. His dignity had given place to a want of self-respect which allowed him to practice mean deceptions to regain a moment that sympathy and notice which had become necessary to his very existence and it was evident to all that

the dog had had his day his great popularity was gone forever in fact bummer should have died sooner there was a time when his death would have last left a lasting legacy of fame to his name now however he'll be forgotten in the in a few days bummer skin is to be stuffed in place with that of Lazarus. I agree with that. So Mark Twain just basically said you're a bunch of fucking idiot yeah but in a great in a great eloquent yeah a great fashion yeah well he was a good writer. Turns out what else did he do after the bummer eulogy? Did he work again? This was the same year he wrote the fuck the frog I

can't remember the name of the place Calaveris bullfrog competition. Oh that was the thing that that was like his yeah that was right so he was just kind of in the bullpen warming up with this material. Yeah he was he was about to write that he was about to just blow out and become huge. I'm glad yeah imagine if this was that that would be amazing. Well this is like this is like dual yeah like the movie dual yeah yeah bummer was also mounted by the taxidermist and placed on display good in 1906 both specimens were donated to the Golden Gate Park Museum now the 8 MHD Young Memorial Museum where they remained in

storage until they were destroyed in 1910. I know right? Why the fuck would you like just for history's sake? Give him out! Yeah give him out! Give him out! March 28th 1992 a brass plaque commemorating the two dogs was placed at Transamerica Redwood Park a small park adjacent to the base of the Transamerica Pyramid which I was gonna go to but I was too tired because I was I was saying it a block away. Oh really? Oh Jesus that'd have been great. I wanted to take a picture. Do a little field reporting? I was so fucking tired. Well we get it you work a lot Dave. Bummer and lousers. Yeah it's a shame. It is a shame. It's a shame

they're gone. It is a great dog story but all dogs die and they go to heaven. Some die violently. And they all go to heaven right? Yeah. I knew it. I like that that was fun. That was the fun one. That was fun. The last one was a little tough the Chinese wars. Oh it feels nice. Yeah only you can imagine those dogs in a tongue you know a bummer tongue a bummer tongue a Lazarus tongue. Alright this is over. Wait. The helicopters are here. Okay now it's time. Nighty night. Bye.