The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 675 - The South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club - Reverse Dollop

Episode Date: March 18, 2025

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club. This time, Gareth reads the story SOURCES TOUR DATES OFFICIAL MERCH       Squarespace use code: Dollop Chewy

We're going on tour and this is it's been a while March 2025 is when our tour is happening. First of all, we're going to Tempe, Arizona Maybe our best city of all time. It's the best that is on March 16th And then we go to Albuquerque, New Mexico, maybe our favorite city ever. We really never love the city We've ever gone to that's on March 17th and then we go to Oklahoma City, which is our faith We often say that it's our number one. Yeah, it's our number one. The best city I've ever been to.

That's on March 18th. On March 19th, we're going to be in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Our favorite city without question. And then we head to Dallas, Texas on March 20th. Our favorite city. That's why there's never been a better city. If you don't like it, you're a Dallas asshole. Thank you.

And then we go to Houston, Texas on March 23, which is by far the best city. And then we end our tour in Austin, Texas, on March 22, at the Cap City Comedy Club. It's the best city. In the entire world. Number one city in the world. You can get tickets at dolloppodcast.com slash tour.

Hey, listen to the Dollop on the All Things Comedy Network. This is an American history podcast where each week I, Dave Anthony, read the story from American history to a goober. Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave can you set up David? Can you set up Dave Internet on Dave and they said what? This only has Wi-Fi buddy. Wait, what I bought an iPad that only has Wi-Fi

I don't even know the difference most so I can't put oh you can't you can't what do you mean got a cheap deal? can't what do you mean got a cheap deal that's wild I didn't know they did that anymore I mean that seems they're like we got some CDs you could pop in it and get some hours no Dave we're we're in the midst of a reverse dollop oh and I'll I'll say it right off the bat. This is going to be two. Glory be to Jesus. Super weird. Well, I'm Mormon now. Super weird. All right. You ready? You want to say anything? Just keep it chunky.

Right. Okey dokey. I remember when... We're still on tour, by the way. Oh, yeah. If you want to get tickets to our shows, this will go up. So we'll still have, after this, we'll have- Yeah, plenty of shows. Oklahoma City, and then we'll be in Tulsa. That's Tuesday, Wednesday, and then we'll be in Dallas, and Houston, and-

Austin. Austin's sold out, though. Austin's sold out, so don't go to that. You can try. All right, here we go. Ready? Three, two, Gareth. Johnstown, Pennsylvania, 1852. It's going good so far.

So far, I don't know if I believe it. Yeah. It is made up. This is about the dam? What are you talking about? Well, by the way, I was like, obviously you're going to know this one. The Cambria Iron Company was founded and within two decades was the largest iron producer in the United States. But I'm going to ask you to not.

Well, but yeah, that's right. All right. Don't be like, we got to keep on top of you. Nope. The demand was mainly to build the trans continental railroad 100,000 pounds of steel were to build There's a guy back then they're transitioning their role It is weird anytime I hear him say trance like was he said he was like transitioning I can't remember what he was talking About recently but I'm like, oh now you're pro trans. All right, asshole

100,000 pounds of steel were needed to build the train from New York to California, and Cambria was ready to help. The factory was located in Johnstown because of all the coal and the number of waterways, including the Connemar River, which helped with shipping. Great. I'm proud of your pronunciation. Time went on, as it do. And by 1881, Cambria was bought by rich guy, congressman, and fan of the best facial hair in the nation's history, or future, the neck beard only, Daniel J. Morrell.

That's the worst. It's the best one. It's the best one without question. It's so upset. It's the facial hair mullet. It's the business on face, party on the neck. It's the best. You can't beat it.

It's the worst. By the way, I will grow one. No, you won't. I'm up without question. What are you doing on the last day of the podcast? Without question, I will have one. It's over. And I have good neck coverage, so we're going to dealing with a turtle. We're gonna have good. Yeah

Why not the face part? You know, it's fucked up. There's a clip of me on Pete Holmes's podcast and Like it's one of the ones, you know a lot of comments and the one that I saw was this guy's like Why can't you grow a beard in those spots? I was like proud fuck out of here It's easy. Gareth is a burn victim. I should say something like that. So have some. Well, the best was there was a guy who

took shit on me about something. I think one of our dollop clips, and I clicked on his profile picture, and it was just him in a cave, and he had two ponytails. And he was calling us like betas, and I was like, cool, double ponytail alpha. Anyway, so Daniel Jam. Morel had some good and some bad when it came to his labor practices. Even though Morel was insanely

rich, he was anti-union. But he wasn't a terrible magnate by today's abysmal standards. He paid $1.50 a day, just like Amazon. Wow. Which the employees appreciated so much that they would dress up in nice clothes when they went to pick up their paychecks, which is cute. Wait. Go ahead. On paycheck day, they dressed up for paycheck day? Yeah, they would go get their paychecks. They dressed like in suits. Because they had to go to the office? No, because they were like, we respect this wage. I think they were like. They were like, they took it seriously. Yeah, but it's better. It's not.

It was. Whenever I get a check in the mail, I always put on a suit. Oh, but that's how you do it. Don't be weird. There was around the clock work though, and injuries obviously. So he built a hospital near the factory, and anyone injured while working got free tear, which is

again one of those funny things. Wow, wow you did a thing you should do. The company also built a library and a night school for the employees. There was a company store too. Johnstown was pretty happening even if the people who inhabited it were quite poor. It was described by a journalist in 1885 as, quote, new, rough, and busy with the rush of huge mills and factories and the throb of perpetually passing trains. I don't know if that should be a throb. Yeah, that's a definite throb.

Trains, throb? One sentence. You know what I'm talking about. But if it's paying well, then why are there so many poor people? That's crazy. What? What does that even mean? Sorry.

What are you talking about? I mean, he essentially owns the whole town, so if he's paying well, then why are the poor people in the town? Now, I'm saying there were some people who got paid well, so he's done. And he was so rich. He had so much money of his own. And that was good for him. He won. Right. He's beating them. Right.

He is a better person. Yeah. He has all the money. He has a neck beard. Yeah. Imagine going to the barber for a shave. What? Just the face. I got to look him up. What's his name? Go ahead.

Daniel J. Morell. Okay. What? Just the face. I got to look him up. What's his name? Go ahead. Daniel J. Morell. Okay.

Many of the residents could eventually afford modest homes by the nearby Conama Riverbank. And look, Dave, I'm not going to lie to you. You were kind of highlighting. Yeah, you saw it? Why would you do that to yourself? It's awesome, right? I don't know if awesome is the right word. It's fully clean face.

It's a clean face and then a neck hair. Yeah, it's awesome. It's crazy. Yes face. It's a clean face and then a neck hair. It's awesome. It's crazy. The best. Who does that? Awesome people who are winning. That's like...

The best. I agree. I mean, that's insane. Really good to see. I agree. It's not good to see. It's tough to not have. Yes, exactly.

It's the best. It is without question. I mean, let me see him again. It's the worst beard ever. It's just crazy. It looks like a neck-merkin. It's the best. I mean, it's the best. Like, how do you talk to someone?

Like, how do you take someone like that seriously? It looks like he's an actor with a fake chin beard and took it off to just have a conversation. It's what an off-hours Santa looks like when he's getting hammered at a bar. It's a step below limp biscuit. Uh, listen, it's durstian. It's worse than durstian.

It's underdursed. Oh, it is a good underdursed. It is low-dursed. We got a low-dursed. It's just the neck. It's bush. It's hot bush. It's some hot neck bush.

He's got a throat beaver. It's like a pubic neck. It doesn't look... 100% neck pubes. Wow. I'm really upset by this guy and I don't want him to live through this story. It's called an under the chin coat. Alright, so anyway. Like we were saying, there's also some poor people. Look, sure there were tramps and some people for the most part were okay with it.

And some people over the tramps got a little weird Like the one guy who was really freaked out by them and in his diary kept what he called a quote tramp count It would read quote Wednesday, May 1st 1889 two tramps Thursday, May 2nd two tramps and Any other descriptions of the tramp? No, just that just the number. It was a numbers. It was like a tramp census. It's counting tramps. Yes, counting tramps. Yeah, that's fair. That's how some people fall asleep.

I count tramps. And so on. OK. Then there were also hunkies. I have stamps. I count, too. Okey-dokey. And then there were hunkies.

Put your hand down. They were also met with some resistance. That term hunkies was for Hungarians who were now being hired by the mill and it seems like all immigrants were called hunkies by the residents. So good racism combined with your xenophobia. I'm not sure what it means. It's not the worst of all the racist terms you can use. I bet it's, I bet if a Hungarian heard that they'd be able to say that. Yeah. Yeah.

I would. What about a Garian? Hungar, it's a Hungarithian. What about a Gare? Outside of what Morell provided, the town had a solid library, an opera house, and a shitload of churches. On a happening Saturday night, why, you could go get a lecture at the library or take in some music in the park.

Plus, there were the shows. Oh, Dave. Oh, Dave, the shows. Like Zozo the Magic Queen. Oh, God, love her. Which brought its own, quote, special scenery car. Yeah. Or the Johnstown performance of Uncle Tom's Cabin that had actual bloodhounds in the show. Which don't want to know what they were doing. Yeah, that's absolutely for sure. Now you're mad, boys. Why are we mad, dad? It's a plot. Or another show that had, quote, two topsy's, two marks, Eva and her pony prince, an African mandolin player, and Tinker, the famous trick donkey.

Oh my God, I want to know more about Tinker. That's all I have. Right? He definitely passed away from stage beatings. Yeah, I would think so. But but until then he could play gin rummy Yeah, no, he was a trick donkey a trick donkey There was even a roller rink There were also 123. I thought that was weird. No, that's not weird. That's a me Sam

I there's there's also they were like it's not I didn't't put it in, but there's Kodak cameras were happening. That feels very... Kodak, a lot of people were, yeah, Kodak, this is a big Kodak period. Yeah, it seems early to me. Because I've run into, I've come across people getting, being given Kodaks a lot around the time. Yeah, it was like a thing.

That must have been fucking incredible. Yeah. That had to be the greatest Yeah that they had to look at that like how like like 80 year olds look at kids with iPhones now Yeah, okay. Yeah, he's looking at taking pictures and everything. But the truth is that's how I feel about phones now I'm like, why are you taking so many? No, you're the guy be like just remember them in your head. Yeah That is close to how I feel now I know you're becoming more as the world becomes more chaotic, you're trying to find ways to control it through food.

Whoa, all right, get out of my ass. Get out of my ass. And working out. Get out of my ass. Eventually, it'll just snap. Working out. Well, the workouts are becoming more extreme. You don't even know what my workouts are.

What are you talking about? You have no clue what my workouts are. We before this podcast were having a very nice exchange about our workouts. You fucking asshole. You're such a prick. There were also 123 saloons. And since it was a steel town, the men got drunk. On Saturdays, the bars were as busy as they ever were.

And at the end of every weekend, the paper would talk about some, quote, disturbance from Saturday night men who would be locked up for behaving in, quote, frontier fashion. Or having fun. That's all I heard. Having fun. I agree. That's actually what it should be called. Where you going?

I'm going out to do a little frontiering tonight. Yeah, fun-tiering. Fun-tiering. We're going to go have some fun-tiering. Shoot, shoot in the street. There also were phones. Around 70 of them. And the Hubert House even had an elevator.

So the thing about there being some phones is there's not enough phones to make it worthwhile. Yeah, because you have a phone and they're like, no one's gonna call. Or then you get one and like someone you don't like gets one and you're like, ah fuck I gotta call. I'm gonna call it Hey

Look at this I'm on the other side of town giving you a call We've done this every day, you know where they're still the only two who have the yes. I know Unbelievable the way that the world moves and it feels like we're just running behind it. Yes, this is the same conversation we have every day. I'll tell you. How close is your mouth to the word port, the receiver? Just like an inch away.

Where are you? That's what happens. That's because I'll say it sounds perfect. It sounds just like you're in the room with me Do you hear the pain but I know you're not because we're talking on a phone and we're not in the same room It's the same conversation. How's my sound? Hmm. It's great. Is it better when I'm Here or here. It's the same Uh, here or here? It's the same. Hmm.

Hey, can I tell you, I can do Impression of Tinker the Trick Donkey with my balls? Whoa. Hello? Oh, no. Oh. Um, okay. Uh, and Dave, the the Conema River was amazing. That's a nice pronunciation.

The Conema River was amazing for fishing. There were catfish and pike, which everyone thought was salmon at the time. I think it's pick. Trout, eels, crawfish. It was just, you shouldn't go fishing too far downstream where the mill was dumping all of its dark black waste The Conama was huge Dave Huge in the sense that it's a large river physically or huge in the sense that it was awesome I think both okay

Yeah, but it was so big that you could fill a lake with the water. So that's exactly what they did That's how rivers work. Come on. There's a man-made lake. This is different. All right, so they dug a lake Mm-hmm. And guess what they called it? The Frank. The Conema Lake. Oh. That's right.

Above Johnstown, they dug this Conema Lake in an area known as South Fork. Now the idea was it was there when they needed in time of droughts. Sure. Pretty good idea. Yeah. We can both get behind that. Yep. The lake would can both get behind that. Yep.

The lake would hold almost four million gallons, and with that much water, they needed a strong dam. And the dam was constructed of mud and clay mounds and layers of small stones and layers of heavy rocks and smashed slate. That doesn't sound good. The building began in 1840. You said layers. Layers.

Layers, bro. The building began in 1840 and really said layers. Layers. Layers, bro. The building began in 1840 and really went through some shit to get it ready. Weather was a major factor as the area would get insane rainfalls. Hence the filling up the lake. Exactly right, dude. And the Conama. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

But regardless, on June 10th, 1852, the dam got completed. Now any good damsman... Don't touch. Any good damsman will tell you that the thing you need in a good dam, besides a lot of love, is the old sluice pipe. Oh, I love a sluice pipe. Okay. You know what a sluice is?

You know what? Some of the best things you can do for a sluice pipe beans prunes I Think we're talking about different stuff. Hold on just greens in general like I don't think we're thinking about a like a salad Do you what do you think a sluice pipe is? It's the thing that your poop comes out of. Okay. All right No poop comes out of. Okay, all right. No. Sleuths beg to differ. Okay. So just to say, you know, America you live in is one in which we both use our own sleuths. Sleuths were drainage pipes. Yes, that's what I'm talking about. No, in dams. They were at the base of the dam.

So what you'd do is during a flood or heavy rainfall, you'd open the sluice. Dave, it's not what you think it is. And then the excess water would slowly drain out and that would help keep the water levels low so the dam would never crest over the top. I can't stress this enough, Dave, you do not want that. You don't want the water over the top of the dam would never crest over the top. I can't stress this enough, Dave, you do not want that. You don't want the water over the top of the dam, okay? Yeah, because if it goes over the top, then it starts undermining the structure.

It's exactly right. I know all about sluices. I've had this experience as well. So the South Fork Dam closed the sluice pipes and the lake was filled. Remember, you want to... Yeah. It's good to close them.

You want them closed. It's okay. We get the water up. Yeah. That's how you get the exact... See? I don't think people like the dams work. Yeah.

You're freaking on top of this. So when the lake became more beautiful nature to behold, there already was. I mean, there were a lot of black bears and there were 20-pound turkeys, which is a good size. It all filled out pretty well. Water monster? Water monsters. There were a bunch of water monsters in the tent. Hey, did you hear about the water monsters? It's going so well up at the old new lake. You know they've got a sludge creature.

They've got a pond. They've got a pond. He don't like the sluice. They've got an underwater pondman who's banging the sluices. Did you hear? I did not. He clogged it with his seaweeds. Oh, good Lord. So yeah, and some even found that the lake had healing powers, like Dr. Robert Montgomery Smith Jackson, who wrote about the iron springs in his book, The Mountain.

So there was an early Dr. Oz. Well, to that point. You must remember when we're talking about Smith Jackson that he also would sometimes bartend at a hotel for fun. And when he was bartending, he would display two jars behind him near some whiskey bottles. In each jar was a preserved human stomach. One was from a guy who died of natural causes and the other was from a guy who died of delirium tremors. So just something to factor in. I mean, what are you doing?

Well, what do you think he's doing? What is he doing? I think what he was doing- Because he wants us to fucking talk. No, no. I think what he was doing was he was showing what happens if you drink. In a bar? Yeah. That's bad for business.

I might be wrong. But that's what I choose to believe. Can I get a whiskey? Well, it depends which stomach you want to die with. Which one you think. Neither. Look at that. And then one night when he's like in the weeds,

there's a lot of people. He's accidentally pouring like the stomach fluid into it Hey, you know a man had oh no. Oh no. Oh Good Lord. Hey a guy goes back up. Excuse me. I believe there's been a mistake. Oh, no I think there's supposed to be a garnish on this glad other than that. It's the finest man. I've ever had Okay, so in 1875 Other than that, it's the finest Manhattan I've ever had. Okay, so in 1875, Congressman John Reilly bought the area, the dam, South Fork, that whole little zone. When he bought it, though, the dam was in need of some repairs. So he did what any...

Who did he buy it from? Who had built it first? There was some other guy. The town or just a private now It was another private over it So the day was in need of some repair repairs and he made the brave decision to ignore that But he did make one change. What are you doing? Get on the camera? It's story time. No, no, no move No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, move. No, no, no, move, move. What are you talking about? Something else, me? No, go to the DollarPatreon if you want to see the snuggles. So the one change he made was he removed and sold the sluice pipes at the bottom of the

dam, which is smart. Well, I mean, I tried that. Yeah. And I think you're talking about something else. Yeah, I'm kind of I tried that yeah, and I think you know about something else. Yeah So at 1880 he sold that area to Benjamin rough for a $500 loss don't do it to a guy named rough rough was a rich coke salesman I wish that that was the other kind of coke. I know it's all I kept thinking Yeah, yeah, give me that other spelling

Yeah, it's running this just a rich cocaine guy. I'm gonna get a lake. I'm gonna get a lake Yeah, I'm fishing Gatkin lines on the damn No fucking sluicing He's got the sluice pipe he's doing blow through it. Jesus Christ Ruff. Are you okay? Let me fuck alone Yeah, I'm telling you the problem for me. Oh man. Yeah, yeah, how many that sluice So, uh So he is a rich coke salesman and he dabbled in trains and he would share in the purchase of this area with Henry Clay Frick who was a prick

Their plan was to make the area not just a beautiful place to visit but a beautiful place to visit for the rich Yeah, they began to build what would be known as the South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club. Fuck yes. A private club for the wealthy that could afford it. Yeah, this is what lakes should be for. I agree. Rich people only. I agree.

And well, it was a beautiful area. And I think one of the things that this show has taught me is that everything's always been totally fucked and bullshit. And this is just another example where they build up this beautiful private area. And a place you can accidentally kill a date. Well, yeah, and you Yeah, exactly. I've accidentally driven my babysitter into the carnivore lake. She's a she's not alive because she will no longer perform fellatio upon me. That's how I've determined her passing.

And now I'll just be doing women's legislation forever to make up for it. Oh, fuck. You think that's what it was? Yeah. Yeah, of course. So rough rounded up a number of Pittsburgh gentlemen to invest in the club, and their modus operandi was, quote, the protection and propagation of game and game fish and the enforcement of all laws of this state against the unlawful killing or wounding of

the same. But Ruff was the president of the same. But Ruff was the president of the club. Basically he's like, we're going to respect this area and like fucking kill a bunch of them. But the dam still was in need of some repairs when he bought it, as we already established, aside from replacing the sluices, which as we've already established were removed. Ruff acknowledged that the issues were there and he was ready to build the dam About 40 feet higher and cut a spill off at about 20 feet below that

Now the spill off is the place where the excess water would go. Mm-hmm say if there were a flood Which I'm not saying we're getting rid of that. Well, yeah, well, that's what he was supposed to do But he saw that it was pretty expensive to do all that. Yeah, it's going to cost money. He had money. I mean, he had money. But he decided, you know what, the Old Dam is actually pretty good. The reason he had money is because he didn't go around willy-nilly spending money on dams.

On safety and the empathy for other beings. Yeah, humans. So he decided the empathy for other beings. Yeah, humans. So, um, so he decided the old dam would work. And he hired 50 men to build the dam up with local rock, mud brush, hemlock, hay, pretty much anything they could find, even horse shit. They put a bunch of horse shit in it. I mean, the thing about hay is that it's going to eventually disintegrate. It'll be gone. I don't know. I think I would counter that if you're using the horse's shit in there,

that's binding. The Great Wall of China is pretty much hay and horse poop. Don't start with me. It is. The Great Wall of China. It is. It is. You always come up with these weird shit facts. Yeah. Well, buddy, that's why I've got that show on Vice. Shit facts. By the way, when are we airing? And I'm looking at the camera. When are we airing?

So at this time, the dam was 72 feet high and 931 feet wide. So they didn't put the new sluices in. No sluices, so the dam has no sluices. They just built it up higher. Built it up a little bit, kind of reinforced it a little bit. Doesn't seem like great. So there's no, I mean, there's no, so if it floods, it's going to go over.

There's no way to really, really. If it floods. If it floods. It's not, it's going to flood. No, no, no. No, it floods it's not it's gonna flood no no no no it actually doesn't cuz nature no no no it doesn't no and let me ask you something how many trains are you a part of which kind of I guess none so maybe you should shut the fuck up let this guy cook okay I'm a human centipede train

yeah or make it human yeah they get human by the way we should you me and Are we talking about human centipede trains? Yeah. Or like a human? Yeah. Like a human? By the way, we should, you, me and Luke should do a human centipede for Halloween. Probably. It's time. So, 1880 to 1885, the club continued construction. They made 16 cottages along the Conama River.

It's a fucking place. It's a's sake. It's a fuck place. It's a fuck shit. If rich guys are creating a little club in the woods, it's for fucking. When you see the people, you are kind of like, this is all. I mean, I've seen the neck beard. No, no, no. That's the only good guy in this. That's not a good guy. He's the only good guy. They made 16 cottages along the Conama River, and while they looked like dollhouses with

Victorian architecture, they were actually insane inside. Conama Cottage is understating it. Each one had fireplaces, kitchens, dining rooms. They built an exclusive clubhouse and cubhouse into a hotel with 47 rooms and a grand dining room that sat 150 members. There were hammocks under the trees. The club also provided 50 rowboats, canoes, sailboats, even a steam yacht.

They had a regatta for Christ's sake. I mean, this place is awesome. Keep the pores out of it. Yeah, well, no, I think you should be able to bring up a pore and then hunt. To hunt, hunt that, I agree. That's the only reason to do it. It's just so, you know what I would love to

do is get a pour from down there in Johnston and put some beef on a string connected to a hat and just see how far they run. Once they're tuckered out, we can go over there, beat them with clubs, get the bloodhounds from Uncle Tops Canada performance, which I saw, which was great by the way, and have the Bloodhounds take part of it and make it a whole thing. By the way, I have a bear now. Oh my God. Yeah. A fucking awesome one.

Yeah. That's great. Yeah. Good for you. Oh. You've never really seen- Bang a line with the sluice. Until you've seen a bear tear a poroport, it's just, you really haven't lived.

I love the, it's just great to watch. From the balcony. So here's the thing, Dave. Ruff saw the dam as also a great walking path to and from the club. But an issue emerged with the dam walking path. Because it's... Well, you could only have... Turned into a cruising spot? No. Also cool. You could only have one carriage cross a cruising spot? No. Also cool. You could only have one carriage cross at a time.

Because it's too thin. It's too thin. So one way... Or what happens... So you would have to... Well, yeah, that was not possible. So you'd have to have a carriage wait. So how are you having a wait?

Like a guy signals? Like what are you doing? I don't even... I don't have the answer, but I would assume they do the thing when you're on a one lane Street, you know going each way and there's some guys standing there with a stop sign Yeah, and he holds it has you know the other that there's a carriage at the other side the telephones There's oh, I have fun. You would call me like hey. Hey birdie. How's it going down there? You got a carriage We got a carriage coming through didn didn't you get my last call?

Boy, it sounds like we're in the same room together. Oh my God, a bear! Uh-huh. The best part is we're at a hotel right now. So what are these rich people to do, Dave? Wait for a carriage? I mean, you pointed it out. It's a construction. It's a fucking flaw. So they wanted to widen it. Yeah. Uh, to make it so the two car... Exactly. Like a road. Exactly, Dave. Um, and in order to do that, they had to lower the dam a little bit. Yeah. Which seems strange to some. Um, you know,

because the whole point of the dam is to not have water go over it. And if the water crests above it, the dam breaks. It's also about driving your carriages around. I agree. I agree. Some things are two-fers. So lowering would make it easier for the water to crest. But what do we know? We're just a couple of yahoos who are being paranoid. So they widened it and they lowered it and they had carriage freedom and just beautiful people were people going to and fro Well, thank you. This was a great story. Well, here's the thing though Some of the people in johnstown thought it looked a little dicey among them. Morel

Who would tell ruff how he felt? now the more you read about it the more it seems like um The more you read about it, the more it seems like Morel was not necessarily concerned about the safety of the people of Johnstown as much as the safety of his workers and his mills. But he wanted to make sure the dam was okay. But Ruff wasn't really listening to that because he was focused on the main concern, which was the fishing. Now now sure there were fish in the lake. Did they import fish? Well he didn't have fuck you fish. So he ordered 1,000 black bass to stock the lake. So then that's a

the bass run for about a buck a piece so it's a lot of money. He's like that's like $30,000 in today's bass. Where you gonna get a black bath scrub? Oh, I got to, are you asking who he did or how you can get some now? I can get you a bunch now. How many do you want? Like 70? My guy only works in thousands. Oh.

So what if you got six to 7,000? Yeah, I actually do that. And where are you putting them just so I know so I can tell the guy? I mean, I have a probably, I mean, definitely someone will be in the bathtub. I don't think you know how many, like 7,000 baths a ton. So you just want 70 for a tub is a lot by the way.

I got a lot of like buckets. I'm gonna. It just be around the yard. I'm gonna keep, I'm gonna not link you up with him. No, we got it. I also have, yeah, I mean, I got other things I can put him in. Put what in? The black...

I don't want to hear about the sluice. So no, no, no, stop talking, please. So he wanted to make sure the fish couldn't sneak out though, right? What does that even fucking mean? Well, because we got the dam. We got the dam, everyone's whining about. I thought that the sluices are gone. There's no sluices, but there's still, there's like, there's still areas for the fish to escape. What are we doing? I agree. You have every right to be that mad that you threw your empty can of

soda on a hotel floor. You have every right. What are we doing? I agree. The fish can just willy nilly. Well, listen, listen, listen, listen. Okay? It's not what Jesus made dams for. Stop. It has dawned on me that this is, we just saw the story of Jaytown. And I don't want to get into it. So they installed fish traps,

which are iron screens that were covering the opening of the spillway. Okay. So during higher water times, the screen would be there to prevent the fish from going through. So that way none of the fish are escaping. Everybody went. There would be a fucking asshole. Yeah, I agree. So I'm trying to think if there are any other issues. Oh. No. think if there are any other issues. Oh, no. Okay. There was an issue in the middle of the dam

because it had broken there before. So there was a sag. The patch it up, right? There was a sag in the middle, which is bad. So patch it up. They patch it up? No, no, no. The center sagged about four feet lower than the rest of the dam. Meaning that where the dam should have been the highest or the most reinforced, it was actually, it would receive the most pressure if there was a flood. Well, that's like- Which I'm not saying there would be, but if there were, it would be more prone to breaking.

It's not gonna be a flood, but also that sounds like it's the water's fault. I completely agree. Yeah. Again, I mean, the little fucking divot in the middle. Yeah, it's a little... Get over it. It's a doinky.

Hey, did I tell you the carriages can go both ways? Yeah, okay. Well, there you go. So, yeah, so you just didn't want the dam overflowing in the center. That's right. And the lake was taken from 40 feet to about 60 feet, but then again, all good. That's a pretty large... That's big. That's a big difference. And the lake was taken from 40 feet to about 60 feet. But then again, all good. So- That's a pretty large- That's big. That's a big difference.

It's big, big. Yeah. But it's great. We got a lot of bass. Fishing has just started. And as I recall- Fishing is like 10 years in. As I recall, you said they built it with like twigs and-

Yeah, berries and poop and string. Some guy threw a rubber band in it. Things are good. The dollop is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace, all in one platform that'll help you stand out, succeed online. Do you want to succeed? I don't. Okay, but I get the impulse. Okay, I get it.

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new customers only, terms and conditions apply. See site for complete details. Ladies and gentlemen, legendary comedy icon Bill Burr is now streaming on Hulu with his new hilarious stand-up special, Bill Burr. Drop dead years. Get Bill's provocative, unfiltered, honest point of view on everything from marriage and parenthood to dating advice and dropping dead. With his new signature raw wit and sharp commentary, Bill fearlessly pushes boundaries as he navigates the nonsense and weighs in on mental health, social media, and societal norms.

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But uh, but while he was there he was was also like, dang, this is crazy. I think this is just like a crazy sex getaway, weird old guy, rich guy stuff, right? No. But, well, I bet you there was weird porn. I mean, anywhere where the rich go is weird shit. Yeah, there's weird shit. You can't. It's like Davos. I love listening to people talk about Davos like, well, you know what I heard from Davos? It's like, yeah, I guess, what? It's like the epicenter of bullshit every year. Okay. So he was like, I'll do the repairs, I'll oversee it. He was ignored continually. And in 1880, he sent an engineer to go out there and inspect it. His engineer was

John Fulton, a mining engineer, great guy, in front of show, and a geologist who was working for the Cambria Iron Company. So he gave his findings to Morrell and on November 26th he stated to Morrell that he did not think the dam was in great condition. And even with the repairs that had been made, and he's air quoting, he didn't find that they were done in a quote, careful and substantial manner, or would the care demanded in a large structure of this kind, end quote. Yeah, but these kind of guys are just like, why do you want that to be so negative? I think the thing is that if you have a cool kick-ass club and someone comes over with a bunch of like I got

I got some things you gotta do to you damn. It's like bro. We're banging bears over here plus, you know fuck your regulate Yeah, honestly, I mean, what are you doing? Well a Deregulation is yeah, what makes America great? Why you have awesome cabins where you can sit bears on porpoise. Yeah, and then cut to today when every bridge has styrofoam in it. Yeah. So it's good.

It's great. So Morell handed the report to Ruff, who did reply in a letter. Quote, we consider his conclusions as to our safe course of no more value than his other assertions, you and your people are in known danger from our enterprise, very respectfully, B.F. Ruff president.

Or, fuck you. Yeah, fuck you letter. No, fuck off. Go fuck yourself. Yeah. But Morell pushed back in a letter that said, quote, we do not wish to put any obstruction in the way of your accomplishing your object in the reconstruction of this dam, but we must protest against the erection, don't, of a dam at that place that will be a perpetual menace to the lives and property of those residing in this upper valley of the Kahnema, from its insecure construction. In my judgment, there should have been provided some means by

which the water would be let out of the dam in case of trouble, and I think you will find it necessary to provide an outlet pipe or gate before any engineer could pronounce this job a safe one, if this dam could be securely reconstructed with safe means of driving off the water in this work as a very desirable one, arrangements could be made to store the water in this reservoir and could be used in time of drought in the mountains, this company would be willing to cooperate with you, I'm almost done, this company would be willing to cooperate with you in the work and would contribute liberally towards making the dam absolutely safe. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Dude, enjoy the boats.

We're hunting, we're fishing, we bring the girls up on weekends. Just shut the fuck up and have a good time Is that him reading it? My joke was rough decline the offer and he just texted back TLDR So yeah, so rough was totally like to fuck off you got a fucking neck beard There's a fucking idiot you got a neck beard shut up. I mean that was a problem Like people are just like it is hard You have to be but a lot of people had that no they didn't

Are you sure yes, that's not a style no there was others Horace Greeley I've we've done this on the show before have we yeah, I've commented on my passion for Horace Greeley This is the best one of all time look at that that. Yeah, but that looks like a collar. Dave, look at this man. I see it. Do you? Yeah. Look at this man.

It's off center. But that one's horse green is better because it's bigger. Merrill's just looks like a layer of hair underneath. It doesn't look like a... This is weird. There's no style to it. It's just like these are... What do you want me to do? Gel it?

I'm not going to throw Nellie Lopes into his neck beard. Like do something with it. I mean, look, it... Oh dude, there's still guys doing it. Oh, come on. What are we doing? What are we doing? That's awesome. I've never been... So everything in this episode is coming back

right now Look at this one That's like a West Virginia, that's awesome. Yeah, this guy's is good. Yeah, it's a good one It's a terrible thing and people need to this one kicks it. Just stop being a person at that point Just be like I'm not I'm not you want to see these pictures. You can be in this room right now Um, Good drink. Look, where are you going? You're not allowed to do that. Okay, so anyways, finally in 1879, the club was ready and it was opened.

The... What, so it would open this whole time? No, it was open for some of this time. But the club was officially opened. It might have been later than that. Anyway, the membership fee was $800. That's a lot. And the rules were simple.

No shootings on Sunday, which America should bring back. Are we talking about people? Yeah, yeah. A public school shootings. You can't do that. Nobody's in school. And if you didn't own a cottage, you were capped out at 14 days per visit. Yeah, that's fair.

Sixty-one who's who names were on the membership roster, among them Andrew Carnegie. Friend of the show. Every now and then, one of the Johnstown poor's would get to visit and would return to tell other people in Johnstown how the rich were living up on the mountain. It was only 15 miles away, but it seemed like another world. It is. Now, there had been major floods in the area in 1885, 1887, 1888. The one in 85, the Stony Creek River, got three feet higher in under an hour.

Oh, God, you're boring me with this shit. Dave, come on, lock in. It's just like let people have fun. I'm letting them have fun. Yeah, but you keep bringing up this stuff that... Well, it's......runs everybody out. Okay, look, if I... You want me to be honest? I have a bias. I'm not here to hear fucking shitty stuff. Listen to the dollop for the fun part. I have a plan. Get into the... What they're doing in the cabins, get into the hunting. Let's go. In 1887, the first glory hole was installed in the main concert area. Oh my God, I'm hard.

So in 1889, Dave, the winter was very tough. There were very high levels of snow, which meant melting in the mountains later than usual that year. Plus, April and May were super rainy. I'm just telling you what... So then you got the snow and then the rain... The rain... The snow melts the snow really bad.

Can you do this in the Bill Cosby voice? No. You got the rain and the snow and then the water? That's probably your best rapist impression. I do a better one. So many options now. Trump. Yeah, no. Trump.

What am I saying? You do better, Trump. And I love to do it, even when they don't love it. So super rainy, and there was a lot more water in the rivers than usual. And Johnstown was getting hit too. But Dave, Memorial Day in 1889, there was a break from the weather. And so the people of Johnstown celebrated. Oh, yeah. They had a big parade that Friday morning. Reverend H. Hulch. Wait, wait, wait. Was it a parade for another reason or did the weather just break and they

had a parade? No, it was from Memorial Day, but they were like, we're not going to be able to do the parade. And then they were like, get it, let's go. What was weather prediction like back then? Nothing, right? You had the Almanac and then some guy would ride into town and be like, it's raining over there. That would be it. That's the best.

Oh, shit. But we're going back to that since the case. I know, yeah. All weather. That's fucking amazing. Okay. So Reverend H.L. Chapman said, quote of the all weather thing. That's fucking amazing. Okay, so Reverend H.L. Chapman said, quote, the morning was delightful. The city was in the gayest mood

with flags and flowers and banners everywhere. We could see almost everything of interest from our porch. The streets were more crowded than we've ever seen before. But Dave, sadly, the parade was short-lived. God damn it. Yeah. Right? Oh yeah. A heavy storm moved in God damn it. Yeah. Right? Oh yeah.

A heavy storm moved in and cut it all short. Like a big storm. Like big. What are you saying? Like the biggest. Like it actually was two storms. And they kind of merged and converged and froze right over that area. That's a lot.

That's a lot. It was pouring rain. Pouring rain. And at the South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club, well, a little worry was sitting in. Oh, really? Yeah, they were starting to get... Why?

Well, because they're starting to go, this is like hurricane level rainfall. The fish might get out. Well, that's certainly a concern. But I think they were, some of them were starting to go, huh? This is like hurricane level rainfall. The fish might get out? Well, that's certainly a concern, but I think they were, some of them were starting to go, uh... Well, we didn't think about this. This wasn't something that was in the plan. Oh, there's someone who's written a report.

Should we get the catamaran? I don't know, what do you think? Maybe steamboat? Oh, it's just a car! Yeah! So club engineer John Park was woken up by the rain. And when he saw the level of rainfall, he was freaking the fuck out. The Connemont Lake was rising quickly, hoping that it would just stop, which seemed to be the plan wasn't working. That's a great idea.

So, he and some of the employees went over there to inspect it. And the water was rising at an alarming level. Around an inch every 10 minutes. So the water had high potential for going over the dam center where again, I don't know if you remember, but I think it's fine. Well there was a little sag in the middle. But that's what, a sag doesn't mean anything. I know, that's what I'm saying. It just means that more water gets in. I'm telling you what they're saying. I'm with you. Okay.

Okay? There's no fucking problem. Yeah. Everything's fine until it is a... That's right. And then when it isn't... Blame the sluice? Yeah.

Then you got sluice problems. Mm-hmm. But really, at this point, what could they do? They had no sluices. They had no useful spillover area. And the only hole that was cut in the dam for drainage was now clogged with debris Because someone put a fish grade over it. So Well, how do you keep the fish in that's exactly the point that I think we're all making. Mm-hmm

Thank you. So Park went to Colonel Elias J. Unger, who was making all the calls that day as he was the current club president. He's got like six phones and he's picking them up. And it's all that guy had.

Go ahead. Does this one work? Talk to me, Jimmy. Does it sound like I'm in the room with you? It's all me. Quit picking up each one. Oh, they should have talked to myself. Hey, it's me again.

Hey, this is weird, I'm talking to myself. Hello, it's me, I'm the other one. Hey, have you seen your mother? Listen, we have multiple personalities and this is weird. I'm talking to myself. Hello. It's me on the other one Hey, have you seen your mother? Listen, we have multiple personalities and this is the only way we can engage them. My therapist told us to... Fibble the phone So he goes and wakes up Elias J. Unger who was now the current club president. I gotta tell you the bad news What? Ruff died. Oh BF Ruff died. He was now dead. He died in 1887. Why did he die?

Someone gave him a stomach to drink at a bar and he drank the whole fucking thing and he can't have two stomachs in one body. Yeah, you know what? You can't just slam a whole stomach. You have to take it apart. So what happened was he drank the stomach that was bad. It replaced his stomach and then he had a bad stomach and he died. That's like what you, that's what like guys doing fraternities, you know.

Stomach chug, stomach chug, hear it Duke. So Elias Unger was extremely out of his element when he saw what was going on. He knew it was quote serious and quote But he didn't know what to do. They kept telling what can you do? It's too late. They kept telling Colonel Unger to tear out that Bridge and pull the big iron fish screen out but Colonel under wouldn't do it Why because he was still like we would might lose fish He's like look I, I hear you. Did you not hear I said black bag?

It's really bad. But imagine if we did that and we were OK and we lost a bunch of fish. I mean, think about it. So with no other option, what do you think they did? Left? They attempted to build the dam higher. In the middle of the-

In the middle of a biblical rainfall. That's a great idea. So they basically were like throwing, like handing down as much earth as they possibly could to heighten the dam. But how? Well, they're just packing, I mean, yeah, it's not fucking work. It's like guys picking up dirt. They were handing it to each other.

They were doing the bail the bucket thing. Yeah, they were doing buckets. They were bailing the bucket with like handing each other earth. Build up a dam in the middle of a storm. And they're really just focusing on the middle part that's like, you know, shitty. Old people are so dumb. Some of these people weren't old. These like workers helping them. Sorry rich people rich people But but I don't even think John Park he might have been wealthy

I mean, but he's a good guy. They're just desperate Well, and and it's all under his call like like John Park was like dude with this fucking crazy and he was like Oh shit. All you should do is tell everybody South to get the fuck out. Well, I don't agree build a day And he was like, oh shit. All you should do is tell everybody south to get the fuck out. Well, I don't agree. Build a dam. Now you build the dam.

So they maybe bought themselves a foot in the middle, max. And now the water level is like two feet from the top of the dam center. Oh my god. So Unger made the brave call. And now he's like, let's get the fish screens out of there. Oh. Yeah.

But it was too late. Has anybody considered firing the Unger? That's an interesting point. Listen, water, it's just not. You're out. You're out. Dirt, you're in. Because the screen wouldn't budge.

It was so jammed up with all the debris and, uh, yeah, you can't move it at that point. Yeah. It's essentially a wall. Yes. And it's underwater now so far that it's, it's difficult. So Unger was now officially freaked out. Um, why?

Well, I think he's like, not fucked up. Um, so he didn't know what to do. He basically calls it. He's like, well done.. So he didn't know what to do. He basically calls it. He's like, we're done. So they were all tired. Apparently right after this he went home and just fell down. He's like, I'm the victim.

Yeah, well, he tried and the water's just fucking him. So like, I don't blame him. This water's a hunky. This is clearly the water's fault. This is hunky water. This water's hungarian sweat.. This is hunky water. This water's Hungarian sweat. Now we're getting to it. I wish we had a pony who could, I wish there was a donkey who could help us right now.

Anyone? Hello? A magic donkey? Hello? He's on the phone. Get me the donkey. So he calls it. So John Park is like, fuck that. He decides he wants to ride his horse to the telegraph office to alert them ASAP. To a Paul Revere situation. He Paul Revere's

it. So he got to the office in 10 minutes. He ran over to the train yard near the telegraph office and he shouted to a crowd that the dam was in a bad spot and Take that message to the telegraph office. And it wasn't... Go ahead. What's the telegraph office going to do? They're going to send a telegraph to all the cities that are down. Okay. Yeah.

So, because it wasn't just Johnstown that was in danger, but there's other cities down the Connemara River. And... There's... Below that is a fucked town. You screwed town. You're all going to die town. And there's a whole bunch that is fucked town. Mm-hmm. You screwed town You're all gonna die town and there's a whole bunch of them all the way down I know it's really first of all, we don't know how this by the way, they named it poorly

You were asked to do it. Yeah, we're gonna be finds Ville also gone So, uh But the thing was the people were heard it were kind of like, dude, chill. Like everyone was like, he's shouting about it. But the problem was there had been this level of, it's obviously very reminiscent of what we deal with now, where it's like, shit's not fucked till it's fucked. So the Tribune in Johnstown had been writing about this and had been on the side of like, don't worry,

it's fine, all this stuff. So now if you're a newspaper that's been writing on the side of it, now you can't go, oh my God, it's bad. You have to be like, yay, you know. Well you do that, I mean that's what they do all the time in our media where it's like, they don't report on it and then it happens, they're like, how, you know. Well, you do that. Then, I mean, that's what they do all the time in our media, where it's like, they don't report on it, and then it happens, they're like, how did we get here? What an unbelievable tragedy.

I was just reading about people saying that today. Yeah. Not like this. Yeah, about what? About Trump and that stuff. No, I mean like this. Well, I always think that's so funny too. I mean, not funny, it's fucking horrible, but like the lead up, how they're all like,

this man should not be the president. And then like, you know, a month and a half later, they're like, Trump named a puppet as the secretary of state, you know, and you're just like, yeah, dude, this is why like your fucking journalism you were practicing leading up to this was dog shit. You had one job. So like I said, the Tribune paper framed this all as largely overblown. So with hesitation, eventually, telegraph operator Emma Aronfield did send the message at 1.52 p.m. that read, quote,

the water is running over the breast of Lake, dam and center west side and is becoming dangerous, end quote. A half hour later, another message was sent, quote, the damage is becoming dangerous and dam may possibly go. So, the water was cutting holes in the dam more and more. The pressure was crushing it. The water was cresting at the sagging center of it all. And then at 310 p.m. You know what? When you say a time, yeah, it's really bad. Why? It's just in any any dollop when you say exact time.

You mean it's not me, whatever you know the exact time. Never good. Never good? You ain't wrong. At least it's not 3 10 a.m. No, it's not. It's not 3 10 a.m. but it is 310 p.m. with John Park, Colonel Unger, and a number of other members of the South Fork Fishing and Hunting Club standing by watching.

I guarantee you one of them had a pipe in his mouth. Oh, he was like, this thing won't light. It keeps going up. Will somebody get me a light that works in the rain? Jebediah, please, not now. Well, hold on. How? Oh, I've got an idea. A flame for cigarettes and pipes and whatnot that works in the rain. Flood. I mean, look, it's 3 10 and I can't like this motherfucker. None of these men better be in a union.

He comes over like while everyone's about to watch the damn break and he doesn't know what's going on. Say boys, can any of you light this in the rain? What are you all staring at, fellas? What's got your eyeballs? So standing by watching, all those guys are standing by watching the dam broke. And they said...

I got to say, that's got to be an amazing thing to see. Just from a... From a standpoint of unfathomable things to watch. Well, they said it didn't even really look like a break. It looked just like one big push. Like a sluice. Like a sluice. Like a big sluice.

Within 45 minutes, the lake was empty. The velocity was comparable to that of Niagara River hitting Niagara Falls. That's a lot. Or in other words, when the South Fork Dam burst, it was like Niagara Falls was running into the valley below and Johnstown for 45 minutes straight. We actually don't know the full levels of rainfall that morning because the weather observer was about to get killed and all of his notes with him. What a jackass. But we do know that 16 million tons of water

was about to go down the Conama River Valley. Cool. And that's the end of part one. Oh. So. I don't think we need a part two. I kind of feel like. I feel like it's over. I should say. Nobody died. It might be the deadliest dollop because I feel like you probably wouldn't do this because you're like Jesus Christ, let me say that the

The book where most of us comes from is David McCullough the Johnstown flood also, there is a Ten huckleberry called I was there also uncle Tom's cabin will post the links to a couple other YouTube videos, but Not good. Not good. Crazy. And it reminds me so much of just what we're watching now with our climate and shit, where you're just like, cool.

All right. Sweet. Rich people cutting corners never works. Yeah. Never works. And what do they get you? They get you fucking... And when you actually have elevation, to some extent we will have a version of...

It's like they've self-moded themselves in these environments. Mark Zuckerberg has an island where no one can get to like these advantages of of what your where you are as far as like damage I mean they just kind of they make these little forts for themselves because they're like well we're full of shit everyone's gonna die oh I can get to it Zuckerberg that would be a great movie yeah it be. Get to Zuckerberg's call it. Yeah. That would be so amazing. You should be able to make a movie like that now, even though we all know that the reaction

would be like, you can't do that. No one would want to pay for it to make, but so many people would love it. It would be so great. And it would just be cathartic for so many people would love it? It would be so great. And it would just be like, it would be cathartic for so many people. I think the, even if right now people are like, dude, in five, 10 years, people will be like, this is the best movie. It's like when you watch like George Carlin at the time, you're like, this guy's awesome. Like now people are just like, what the fuck?

How did you know everything? It was just like, he's just fucking pissed. Well, there you go. So part two. Well, everybody loses. Not necessarily. The rich guy. By the way, I wonder if the trick pony made it.

I don't know the information. I'll try to find out. Isn't that a donkey? Oh my god. Was that a trick donkey? That was a trick question. that was a trick question. Oh, it was a trick trick donkey Okay, and trick ass have you heard trick asses new album? Great Hey dollop fans, I know you love the dollop you love listening to the dollop

Do you want to watch the dollop you're like Gareth? What are you talking about? By the way? It's not Gary It's Gareth. Well, we have partnered with Lakeside Animation and we are starting to animate some of our episodes. So if you want to go watch a five-part animation, which is actually like a 22-minute episode or 30-minute episode, I can't remember, of the Rube, you can go to Lakeside Animation on YouTube and watch a really awesome animation of the Rube. I'm going to go ahead and put this on the screen.