The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 691 - Jimmy Swaggart - part one

Episode Date: July 8, 2025

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine televangelist and sex machine Jimmy Swaggart SOURCES TOUR DATES OFFICIAL MERCH   Helix Sleep Nutrafol - Code: TheDollop Rocketmoney  Squarespace - use code: Dollop

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Well, look, we've said this over and over again, but if you want to know if we really do like Squarespace, go look at any website we're affiliated with and it is Squarespace. Oh yeah, look, they have flexible payments. You can just make the... Flexible employees too. Those people are... It's weird. Okay. You can make the whole checkout experience seamless, very simple, very powerful. They do credit cards, Apple Pay, all the stuff, PayPal.

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I feel like we shouldn't have you on this. Okay, keep going. And if you're a business, you can manage your clients and invoices, vetting and receiving payment. Am I allowed to speak? Because I think that's a good point. No. Go to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch go to squarespace.com

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No, I don't. You like him. I don't even know. You're one of the few people you like. What if I liked him? What I wouldn't I know who he is at this point? I don't even know. I don't even know what to say anymore. You're listening to the dollop on the All Things Comedy Network.

This is an American History podcast, or each week, I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to my failure. Gareth Reynolds. Oh, oh, who has no idea what the topic is going to be about. Well, I move my camera over a little bit more. with Reynolds. Who has no idea what the topic is going to be about. Should I move my camera over a little bit more? Should I just do this? If you like looking at me, then yeah, maybe change it.

So this week, somehow I switched the files on the baseball fight episode to a pastimes one and that's been fixed. So if you downloaded the last episode, the baseball fight, and it was a pastimes episode, that has been rectified. I don't know what I did. I shouldn't do it late at nightimes episode that has been rectified. I don't know what I did. I shouldn't do it late at night when I'm tired. By 11 p.m. I'm six bottles of gin in. Last time you got drunk.

Drunk? Like drunk drunk? Oh boy, that's a tough one. Tour? Yeah, probably last time I was on tour somewhere with you. I don't really get drunk. Drink? Yeah, like I, you know, on 4th of July to celebrate our great nation, I had like three beers.

I uh, I really when I was like at home that night, not watching fireworks, we both talked about how stupid we now think fireworks are. For so many, they've been dumb. There's certain things that all of a sudden you're like, wait, what? Well, because when I was growing up, every town didn't do them and now every town does them. I also think it used, it was like you had access to them less in general. every town does them. The dollop.

Yeah, go see us on tour. We're doing a bunch of Midwest dates in October, which runs before this anyway. All the dates. I think that's it. No other news. Join our Patreon. Yeah, I don't know. We're the bad boys. We've been the bad boys for a while. We love it when people throw dolls on stage. You're the doll heads. We love that.

I think that's everything. People got mad because I told people to wear masks. At what? They were like, some places you can't do that. Okay, we'll know where you can do that. Also, when I'm talking about you're in your car and ISIS filming you, that's not actually a protest. You're in your car.

So you can put on a mask in your car. My video was about being in your car and ICE filming your face. So you're not in a protest if you're in your car. I like this relationship. It's just, I just, you just. The comment, the comment. It's just read all these people and it's like man you're hitting fascism just become

ungovernable. That's it. Fuck your laws. It's all off. Can I wear a clown outfit? Yeah we were hoping you would. I think it's time. Yeah. The petals are hard with the shoes. May I wear flip-flops? Yeah, yeah. And I could just do clown the rest. I would paint the flip-flops red. Well, the flip-flops, are you saying paint my exposed feet red too?

No, you can, no, that's weird. May I paint my exposed feet red? Yeah, okay. Thank you. Thank you very much. Okay, all right, now I'm ready to start. So this is an episode that we did during the online times, much. Okay. All right. Now I'm ready to start. March 15th, 1935, year of our Lord J-Town. Jimmy Lee Swaggart was born in Faraday, Louisiana.

Seven months later, his cousin Jerry Lee Lewis was born in the same town. Oh God, no, right. This isn't about Jerry Lee Lewis, obviously. No. He just makes an appearance. Now, at that point, was he trying to date his baby cousin? Well, he was just born.

I know. So you think right away he was trying to date? Well, his baby cousin wouldn't have been born yet. So his baby cousin wouldn't have been born yet. He was just born. He's a baby. I don't... He goes younger.

A layer of tissue is not going to stop my Jerry Lee Lewis. He goes younger. So by your theory, he would be trying to date a sperm and an egg. Now you got me. You didn't have me before, but now you got me. Jimmy Swigert's mother was Minnie Bell. Yeah. That's a terrible name. No, it's a great name. They had another cousin, Mickey Gilly. Now that's a bad name. The Lewis Swaggered Gilly clan was very poor, and Jimmy's father was a fiddle player and a Pentecostal preacher.

Willie Leon. What a what a job split. Well, you got to work it all and Pentecostal. You got to make money at night. That's that's some which way he's fiddling at night. Put down the snake, pick up the fiddle. Yeah, there you go. How to do it. I agree. don't get them mixed up now. No you get them mixed up Yeah, it's gonna be bad

They live in a part of town with a bad land for growing crops Imagine so they're barely able to grow enough food to get by a lot of people in the family played music Okay musical family much like the They're barely able to grow enough food to get by. A lot of people in the family played music. Musical family, much like the Jacksons. I don't need you to cite other families that were... I understand the concept, so I don't need to... The Osmonds. Right.

The Kelly family. Almonds. Very good. They were nuts, though. I'm sorry. That was... cut it. They, sorry, I said that. Very religious, very, very religious family. When Jerry's family got him a piano, the three cousins would gather and play it together. I think there's something to

be said for the ultra rich embrace religion and the uber-poor will embrace religion. Other people obviously go towards it, but it's ways of fathoming the oddity of your life. Don't you think? I always think that with athletes, when like, if a guy can throw a football 70 yards, he's like, I believe in God. I mean, look what I'm doing. Well, some do, some don't. There's a lot of guys that can throw a football and or hit a baseball and are like, A lot there's a lot a lot that do Uh, yeah, but there's a lot that I really think there are a lot that don't also Baseball at least they should have their own huddle before the game, but if you can't believe in anything, you can't really separate

sports from Religion because you know the middle it's it's We don't believe in anything. We can't really separate sports from religion because sports are so popular in religious places. Texas, et cetera. Yes. What about that one season where John Kitna turned the whole Detroit Lions team Christian? And then GM was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on. What are you talking about? Christian. And then they're like, GM is like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on. What are you talking about?

I love when there's a coach that basically makes the whole team be religious. It happens at college a lot. They're like, by the way, we're all praying now. Okay, back to this nonsense. At eight, Jimmy had a revelation from God. A lot of us do that, eight or nine, it's a pretty common childhood moment. He's in line at a movie theater

and God told him not to go in. I thought he was going to be like, don't go see- Sinners. Don't go see sinners. Go see singing in the rain. Quote, the Lord spoke to me. I know that sounds funny.

It was not an audible voice or anything of that nature, but I sensed it and felt it in my heart. The Lord said, don't go in there, but give me your heart. I want to save your soul and set you apart as a chosen vessel used in my service. It's just a guy behind him. I always say this when I'm in line. I just said it, sorry. Jimmy ignored it and he stayed in line. Interesting. And then he was killed by lightning. No. That's it. That's the end of the story. When he put his quarter in the ticket machine, it jammed.

What is that? What is that? It's the Lord. It's certainly following the needle. Quote, then I heard the Lord again. I finally got my quarter and left. He gave him the quarter back. Well, he must've, or he got it back from an employee.

So they had a ticket machine that you put a quarter into? Yeah, these are different times. Who knows? What happened machine that you put a quarter into? Yeah, these are different times. Who knows? What happened to the person who bought the ticket? Well, this is before that whole system. This is when it was a quarter. It was like easy. We're going back to that version. Eliminate the human. So that's a bullshit story that he tells. As they got older, Mickey and Jerry turned to music. Jerry was expelled from his church

for playing a rock version of My God is Real. That I get. That you get, that's interesting. You have strange lines. Keep your fucking rock out of my church. Yeah, okay. You little creep. What are you gonna,

see here's the thing about you rock guys. You start out rockin' and rollin', it's sex music, and next thing you know, you're bangin' your cousin. Excuse me? Stop talking. Your underage cousin. Excuse me, that's very specific. Well, let's see if my idea of bringing rock

into a church plays out. I think you've cheated the system because I think you've put out your evidence knowing the verdict. All of the people who told him to get his rock music out of the church when he started banging his cousin were all like, I told you. But he got it out of the church. So wouldn't that be a case for why,

shouldn't he have not done that? He shouldn't be doing the rock music at all. Let him play the rock in the church. I bet he done cousin fuck. How about that? Catch me outside. Absolutely grotesque. Catch me outside. So Jimmyotesque. Catch me outside.

So Jimmy was more into preaching and at 17 he dropped out of high school and married Frances Anderson. For Anderson. For Anderson. She was 15. Look, how old is he? I mean, he's 17 so it's two years. It's not that bad.

That's pretty. Look, we're not, again, we're not going to,'s two years, it's not that bad. That's pretty common. Look, we're not, again, we're not going to, I'll tell you a position that ages poorly, you know, pro teenage marriage fucking. But as far as the egregious things we've heard on this show. But look, 17 and 15 is a pretty common, particularly in high school now, it's a common thing, although they don't do that now, they do one year off, at least in my kid's school, but, which is crazy to me, but girls-

You can't go senior freshman. That one did creep me out. Yeah, that creeps me out. Well, now that my kid's in high school, I'm like, oh yeah, no, freshmen shouldn't be in high school, they should be in middle school, because a lot of them are still tiny. Yeah, I was.

But 15 and 17, girls are more mature. So a 17-year-old dude is almost like a 15-year-old girl, like brainwise. Right, yeah, right. So anyway, that's not that bad. We've seen a lot worse. Way worse. And we're going to see a lot worse in this story.

All right. Rock and roll. Yeah. Jimmy Lady described her as quote not pregnant. It's nice to be sweet and say cool nice things. She's great. You love her. She's not pregnant. Oh. You'd love her. She's got so much good stuff. Well what is she like? Oh my God. She has long brown hair. She's not pregnant. She's not pregnant. Yeah, no. And it's not from a lack of nothing.

Well, I wish I hadn't said that. She has curly hair. And it's kind of wavy. I've gone in the butt. She is not pregnant. Jimmy, I feel like we should just. Nobody's had less of a fetus in her than than her. Nobody's had less of a fetus in them than her. I gotta

be honest as as your preacher, I did not expect and the Lord said such revelations when I asked you to finish the job outside. Simple question. I spilleth my seed on the tummy pool. I am both uncomfortable and excited. Can you paint? I would like a picture. I think I did. She's got brown hair. She's not at all pregnant.

Yeah. That sounds that does sound like a Trump, like a Trump non sequitur. That's, uh, so in 1955, he gave, gave his first sermon in front of a grocery store. Absolutely. It's just like the people are just outside yelling about God. Yeah. You have to wonder if God would be like, Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey, no. Yeah. Not when I was. I actually don't want you bothering everybody. That's annoying. That side's fucking crazy. God would be like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. No, not when I was.

I actually don't want you bothering everybody. That's annoying. That sign's fucking crazy. Yeah, we're not, we're not as. So what, you just got a huge plank of plywood and just painted it green and then wrote on it and then laminated it? Yeah.

And now you're just carrying it eight feet above your head? Yeah. It's an eyesore. Yeah, but people get it. I don't think they do. You're not helping the. Yeah, but people get it. I don't think they do. You're not helping the cause. I think people get it. Do me a favor.

You do me a favor. Excuse me? Yeah. No. Sorry. You are not doing that. Sorry. Start fundraising a little bit.

That's a way to do it. Oh. I don't like you just co-opting a block. God needs money. No. No, no, no. Don't put it like that. God needs money. No, to help no, no. Don't put it like that. God needs money.

No, to help the infirm. For the abortion. Excuse me. I knocked her out. Excuse me. So yeah, so in front of a grocery store, he played an accordion to draw crowds in, which always works. Always works. That's how you do it. You've heard that before? Yeah. But that's according to who? They had a son, Donnie, in 1954. Jerry Lee became famous in 1957 with his first big rock hit,

a whole lot of shaking going on. Big one. That means fucking. Yeah, it does. Because rock back then was all about banging. Yeah, it's one. That means fucking. Yeah, it does. Because rock back then was all about, you know. Yeah, insinuated fucking. Yeah. So Jimmy was singing gospel at this point,

and Jerry Lee falls into drugs and alcohol, and Jimmy spoke out against Jerry Lee's wayward life. Okay. You know, his cousin. He's really gone down the path. Yeah, he's way off the fucking path. Quote, Jerry Lee can go to Sun Records in Memphis. I'm on my way to heaven with a God who supplies

all my need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Well, I mean, you gotta pick. What do you want? You know, do you want the party now or later? Now. Yes, that's how I feel. Now's the now the party absolutely especially with the repent loophole. Yeah, seriously You can just wait till the last minute

Why would you why that's that's sort of a loophole that they leave open by allowing people to convert at the end Yeah, because my plan it does set up a more bright sinful world because there are some that believe you have to live a whole Holy life, right? Yeah There are some you might have to go to purgatory You go to purgatory. I wouldn't mind it. I mean, especially if I know like after I'm taking the elevator But I don't want to go to the place where the religious people are you'd buddy Whatever you're gonna get you then you get your own section. It's like smoking or not want to go to the place where the religious people are. You'd buddy. Whatever. You're going to get you.

Then you get your own section. It's like smoking or none. I don't think that is true. It's very much a smoking or none. It's very much a smoking or none. OK. And you're sure? I'm pretty sure.

I'm pretty sure it's a smoking or none. So by the 60s, Jimmy is preaching all over the southeast, recording gospel albums and gets a radio show. Okay. So he is fucking. He's also on the radio. Yeah. Him and his cousin are killing it. And he's doing it the pious way. So at a show in Ohio, Jerry is so high on drugs that he can't play. So Jerry is very off all of it. It's not like he's just doing rock. He's shaking, he's pillin'. Yeah. I mean, that's one way people respond to oppressive religion.

Go the other way with it. Here we go. That's how I do it. Straight to anal. So Jimmy carried him off stage, quote, Jerry Lee is my cousin and I love him. And I think that you know I love him and I've come to take him home.

I assume he thought he was going to save him at this point, right? Like he was going to find Jesus and off they go. Yeah, he's just going to wake up like dehydrated. I wish there were pictures of him carrying him. I want to see him carry a grown man. I like that. I like that for.

Do you think he did it like over the back? Or you think like a bride crossing the. I love a drag. Dragging him. I love an arm first drag. OK. Or a foot first drag. Yeah, foot first drag. But you got to think of the head. So I like an arm first.. Okay. Or a foot first drag. Yeah, foot first drag works.

But you gotta think of the head. So I like an arm first drag. What about a head drag? A head drag? That's wrestling. That's different. That's a different energy. So Jerry Lee continued his life and then things completely fell apart for Jerry Lee when he

married his 13-year-old cousin. He's 22. Now we can be outraged. That's not as bad as a 1715. 22 to 13. Well, she's a child. That's a child. She's a child. That's a man and a child. Yes. And a cousin. That's right. You know it's bad when you're not even paying attention to the cousin part. But you know her so well. It's horrible. Because you've been around her a lot. Not cool. As a child. And now she's barely on the cusp of adulthood. I'll tell ya.

And you are ready because you're 22 and on drugs. I remember when my ex, I was at her family's place. She's 13? Why'd you bring her up? I was at her family's place for the weekend and they put on her birth video, like to watch it with joy. And I'll tell ya, it threw me for a goddamn loop for a little while. No, you don't, you don't.

I was a baby dater. Did we see the baby come out of the? No, but we saw everything but. We saw like right after. How old was she? At the time? At the time, yeah. Oh, I don't know.

We were, I don't know, 29? But I was like, it was just like through, I was like, I'm dating that baby. Yeah. No. Yeah, that's weird. Yeah, I was sitting there was like, I'm dating that baby. Yeah. No. Yeah, it's weird. Yeah, I was sitting there later like, I gotta go, I got some real stuff to think about.

I'm a piece of shit. I'm dating a baby. You are a piece of shit. David. So his career basically, it's over. Is it really over? Yeah, it's over, yeah. Which is surprising at that time, honestly.

Because he did great balls of fire, a whole lot of shaking going on. You know, and then, you know, he was a big, big rock, one of the biggest rock stars. Yeah, he was surprising at that time honestly, he did great balls of fire whole lot of shaking going on You know and then you know, he was a big big rock one of the biggest rock stars Yeah, he was big piano guy you you would think that people like yeah 22 13, but I guess not What do you mean? Like yeah pro? Yeah, like I'll be fine with it at that time 60s 60s. Yeah so Jimmy's congregation is growing. He's becoming more famous. Okay, he put out albums Yeah. He bought a small AM radio station, and in 1971 he began broadcasting

on small TV stations in Baton Rouge. So TV. TV. Let's go. Big. Baton Rouge. Televangelism was on the rise, and Jimmy leaned into TV,

and in 1973 went into business with producers who syndicated his show across the United States. And by the 80s, he was on over 3000 stations. It's so weird because I did grow up like I grew up obviously in this time of like watching it and always just being like, what the fuck is good? Like, yeah, it was alien to us. But even as someone who was not religious, I was like, this is crazy. Yeah, to me it's always like- Having it on TV was crazy.

Yeah, to me it's always like, there's religion, okay, fine, but then watching a guy on TV and giving him money to me is fucking crazy. Now I'm just like, you're out of your fucking tree. Watching, like, I would be like, oh, okay. I like, I don't get going to it, but I'd be like, I understand you like it. It does not translate to, it'd be like watching hacky sack a lot. Like that's a, go back to the story. Go back to the story. The hacky sack championships. Uh, So he's making a lot of money.

He's famous. He now had high level donors. Zoe McDonald Vance was a very wealthy, three times widowed woman. And she had a multi-million dollar California beach home. She wasn't really religious, but she started watching Jimmy in 1978. You get sucked in. You get sucked in. What are you talking about?

You get sucked in. Oh, this is good. Wow, this guy's amazing. This is why cable needed to happen. Yeah. Yeah. Just because, wow. Yeah.

And then he started doing, and then she started going to his crusades. So she gets drawn in. She's like, all right, I'm going to go see this guy live. It's like for you, Guns N' Roses. By the way, my brother went and saw, uh, uh, Lamb of God play Ozzy's last show yesterday. Looked pretty amazing on video. He said, he said that Lamb of God kicked fucking ass.

He said there were a few that just fucking nailed it, but Lamb of God, one of them, by the way, by the time this comes out, Randy is meeting my mother for tea, and he's surprising his girlfriend with the tea. So that's happening tomorrow. But during Guns N' Roses, my brother was like, that's when I walked out for five minutes. He was like, what is happening? Well, the band is fine.

Axel's out of his fucking mind. Well, Axel's unfortunately the band now. So it's like. Oh, the other guys weren't there? I don't know who else was there. No, they were there. Axel's not the band. Well, he was for ages.

No, but they. For like 30 years he was like, I'm retooling. And then he'd come out every now and then and people would be like, are those worms on your head? He made them all sign, giving away the name of the band or else he'd start a riot. and people would be like, are those worms on your head? He made them all sign giving away the name of the band,

or else he'd start a riot. They are separate, so they have separate entrances and they go into separate green rooms and then so weird and then he we need this in the contract i would love that in the contract he gets to play a certain amount of chinese democracy songs and it's hilarious because if you're at a show as soon as he starts singing his chinese democracy song every phone comes out in the entire oh yeah i bet and no one pays attention i bet but duff when he plays duff duff yeah uh when he plays a punk song, everybody's into it. Interesting.

That they don't even know. So they all get to play a little. But no one's into Axl's bullshit. Yeah, right. God. God. Anyway, so she starts going to his crusades and Jimmy goes to her home and he baptizes her in the ocean,

like I did with you. And he said- You held me down for so long. Seven minutes, seven minutes. And I just always remember everything I've seen, it's a quick dunk. Yeah, but it can be, you get more God for the longer you're under.

I know, but I really lost- Two people I wanted- You know part of my brain stopped working. Two people I wanted to baptize. The part that knew history. Before that, I was big into it. I want, you know, part of my brain stopped working. Two people I wanted to baptize. The part that knew history. Before that, I was big into it. I knew a ton of history. You helped me under seven minutes. I thought Ben Franklin was a president. I really wanted to, you know, I wanted to baptize, but I also really, really wanted to baptize Russell Brand.

That's like a 10 minute baptism for me. Yeah. That one I actually understand. Yeah. Oh Crocky you've helped me under for a long time haven't you? Yeah you good. That's a vile. I don't even know what's happening there it sounds. It's just like him. You didn't nail that one. Um. It must be nice to just sit there and just be Simon Cowell accent. It is. Well you say spicy meatball. Spicy for it. Her sister sued. Oh, sorry, she died in 1991. Did I leave that part out? Yeah.

And then she leaves Jimmy a ton of money. Nice. So her sister sues, and as the estate was supposed to all go to kidney disease research, so Vance's only son died of kidney disease 16. So that's why she was like originally supposed to. Yeah. So the court battle went on for two years

and then they finally settled and Jimmy got 70%. Pretty good. I mean, those were her wishes. Those are her wishes. Yeah. Yeah, whatever. Those are her wishes. The rest went to the kidney foundation.

That's nice. They got something. Mm- went to the kidney foundation. That's nice. They got something. And so Jimmy now got family oil land in Texas. Oh, I didn't realize it was oil land. And he was now making $100,000 a month from oil. Oh, fuck me. American story right here. Wow. He only had to use the money for children's ministries. He only, so I think that was a stipulation. He had to use it for child ministries. I like how that's like better to like and I want to be very discerning. Brainwashed. It can only be for the very young. Brainwashed the young. The very young must be indoctrinated into this. What a crazy. I hate, I hate to be, sorry Jimmy.

You've got a flock, but this is for babies. Yeah, well I really want you to. This is for the babies. Let's get you crazy in a little, little kid's mind. Okay, let's, excuse me, excuse me. I want to be careful after talking to my family and my council. This is for toddlers.

This is a toddler church. On October 26th, 1984, a 19-year-old teenager who suffered from depression was drunk and shot himself in Indio, California. His parents blamed Ozzy Osbourne and his song, Suicide Solution. They said it had hidden messages, had suicide messages.

If you're gonna go that route it doesn't sound too hidden. You can just go the direct route. I mean, the song title is, if you're going to make the case. Not hidden at all. I feel like he was pretty overt. I was just trying to say up front. There's an impression for you. Now suck balls.

Okay, now do Ozzy in 1984. Nineteen, eight, 94? 84. 84. No, he wasn't like that in 1984. Nineteen, eight, 94? 84. 84. I'm a long parent. No, he wasn't like that in 84. I was a lot more like this. Okay, now.

You just ruined the fun. You ruined the fun. You know what I heard the other day was an Irish preacher, but he had the cadence of that. And you actually heard that or that was, I heard that. Oh my God. So he's just like, that's right. The Lord is come and he's making a sure.

Oh my God. That's amazing. I was like, that'd be one I would stick my teeth into. Yeah. So the family sues Ozzy and Ozzy is like, there's no hidden messages. It's a song about alcoholism and a musician friend who drank himself to death. So the court-

Has anyone ever been on Ozzy Osborne again? So the court dismissed the case. And Ozzy became a regular target of Jimmy, however. Okay. So the televangelist industry was very tight-knit. Marvin Gorman was another international televangelist phenomena guy from Louisiana. Now, full disclosure, I did tour with Gorman for a few years. Yeah, you guys.

I kind of probably should just, maybe just step out for this part of the story. You're, that you... I'm a Gorman again. Yeah, and your album was called Gormin' Again, right? Gormin' Again, yep. Gormin' Again and again. A minister nearby, David Savage,

asked Reverend Gormin to counsel his wife, Linda. Because look, if you're having marital issues, the best guy to go to is another like con man to work with her. Absolutely. And so Gorman and Savage are friends, so he counsels Linda. And on December 28th, 1978, she calls and she's in a hotel

and she's thinking about committing suicide. Okay. She must've had Ozzy on. So Gorman rushes over, the door's a jar. Just say open. Stop it. And no, it's actually a jar. Oh. Yeah. That's strange. And Linda is on the bed in a bathrobe. Oh, Christ. And there's a spilled bottle of pills and Gorman sits beside her, you know, because this is scary, and then she pulls off her robe, and they start kissing. Now, hold on, Gorman said he did not disrobe.

No, he did not. He did not take off his clothes. But he did pull his dog out. What the fuck? Nobody needs your nipples. This is how you do it This is not how you do it and then they started having sex She's all peeled out on the death story. He got the he got the Johnson out. Oh my god And I remain clothed except for the dog the dog dead drop out for a while

But he lost his heart on Midway because of the guilt. Oh my God. Let me tell you, that's the only part of the story that's not real. What the fuck? I lost my boner after it comes. Oh, everything has to be done with that cadence? I do like that setup.

But yeah. I was a-trying, and I could not finish, okay. I dug as deep as I could. My balls were rubbin' my zipper, cause I kept my clothes on. Yeah, there's no way he didn't. He fucking blew his load and then he was like, oh, now it's not working anymore.

That is so, that, I mean, obviously that's rape. No, because she, no, she's trying to seduce him. Oh she is yeah clearly You're being funny No, she took she took the they were sitting down again, then she took the robe off Oh, but I thought you said she was surrounded by pills Well, there were spilled pills on the table, but she she may have been inebriated, but she also Sat down next to him and took her a robot. She was unconscious. Yeah. Okay.

I was picturing a different thing. I don't love it either way, to be honest. I'm not, if I walked into that situation, I don't think it would end with. Well, you need to go to church more. You know, you're so right. This is what it- You're so right. It's what God wants.

You're so right. I just, I keep, yeah, there's this whole, yeah. So he loses his boner and then he begs for forgiveness and then he leaves. He's upset because he's cheating on his wife or he's taking another man's wife. Yes, both I think. So he asks God for forgiveness also.

Okay. And quote. You're good, dude. Under the- Dude, you lost your boner halfway through. Under the blood of Jesus, his sin was forgiven. Yeah. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Quit crying, dude. You're all good, hey, you lost your boner halfway through. Under the blood of Jesus, his sin was forgiven. Yeah. That's how it works. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Quit crying, dude. You're all good. Hey, you're all good. Hey, hey, hey. Hey, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. You lost your boner, dude. Hey, listen, this is Jesus. First of all, I forgive you.

And secondly, I want you to take me through it real slow. Take me through it slow. I'm going to take my Jesus dick out. What? Boy, boy, boy, boy, out. Sorry. Go to your planet. The Mormons were right.

The Mormons were right. Jesus, go to your planet. That's it, boy. Go to your planet. So he doesn't need to tell anyone. He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you.

He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you. He's going to tell you. He's going to your planet. That's it, boy, go to your planet. So he doesn't need to tell anyone because Jesus forgave him. Right. Right, so then you can keep it a secret. He kept counseling the savages, so he continues. Well definitely. Look, he's already started the process. Saved the marriage.

So keep him in the fold. And he keeps banging Linda. Well, now that, okay, I'm losing me a little. Yeah, but you want her to be able to take in the message. You want her to be satisfied and happy and feeling good physically. Quote, during counseling sessions, he indicated to her that she had a sexual dysfunction and she needed to learn how to climax and he would teach her that. So there you go.

Now that I've pulled. I've pulled that one before. That one I've pulled. It's worked twice. And then the best part is you don't make them come. Well, yeah, I know you're kind of fucked. I don't know, you're kind of fucked again. I don't know, it's you, it's totally a you thing. If I can't do it.

If I can't do it, then nobody can, I don't know what to tell you. She also had sex with her brother-in-law and the church music minister. So Linda likes to fuck. By the way. So let her fuck. Look, if you're looking to cheat,

go with the guy who plays with the organ all day. But also, just Linda, have a good time. Yeah, I agree. She also had sex with her brother-in-law, I did that in the church music ministry. Do it again slower. And a son, and had a son nine months after having sex with Gorman and her husband on the same day, so she doesn't know who the father is. But you'll find out as they grow up.

Yeah, I like that patient way to, yeah. Oh, look at his lobes. So the dollop is brought to you by Nutriful. Gareth, Nutriful is of course a hair supplement, which I have been taking for, well, it's been a while now, a year and a half or so. When I started taking it, I was like, I don't know, and it works.

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So in 1986 Gorman in, Linda is consumed with guilt. Oh, she's been fucking everybody. Oh, right. Right. She fucked everyone in the church. And she makes a confession to Reverend Michael in desk. He's on the other side. Like, are you still looking to what are we doing right now? Do you mind if I take my organ out? Is this? I'm not going to get naked, but do you mind if I take my organ out during this? Is this like? I'm not gonna get naked, but do you mind if I play with it? Are you hitting on me right now? No, well, I have something to confess. This is a two-way street. May I also confess?

Yeah, I'm not gonna. I've been masturbating during your confession. Oh my God, so have I. Oh my God. Mm. Because it was illegal to tape it in Louisiana, he gave the video to Jimmy. Did I mention that he taped it?

No. He videoed it. He videoed the confession? Wouldn't you? That is an, what is it, the real world? That is an absolute nightmare. So now Jimmy gets the video and he confronts Gorman. And he. Gorman.

Gorman was like, holy fuck, that is very damning. He confessed, denied there were others. Jimmy and David Savage accuse Gorman of having sex with another woman, Lynette Goh. They said Gorman admitted it. Now Jimmy pretended he wanted to help Gorman, but he really wanted to end his career, which would hope. Yeah. Cause then what that's the audience that he can just pick up. Jimmy spread the word of the affairs and he says that Garmin had hundreds of affairs. Oh, wow. So he... And Gorman left the church in July of 1986. He gets defrocked a month later, he's ruined.

Jimmy took him out. Yeah, okay. Gorman would start up a new tiny church in New Orleans. What a tiny church. In the New Orleans warehouse. It's finger puppets. In a warehouse, so it's not that tiny. It's not terrible.

But it's tiny in numbers, I think. Sure, compared to what he was doing before. You can't start a new church in a warehouse. So that's not that tiny. It's not terrible. But it's tiny in numbers, I think. Sure, compared to what he was doing before. You can't start a new church in a warehouse because it's gonna seem really empty at the start. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of a bringer. You bring it, you have a drape halfway through. Yeah, a curtain that you pull across. The shame curtain that I'll have at the Irvine Improv

in two weeks. Saturday night late show shame curtain. So now the big rival is Jim Baker. Nice. And he was friends with Gorman. So Jim and Tammy Baker's PTL club is broadcast across the US. PTO? What does that stand for?

PTL. PTL, okay. What does that stand for? Parents and teachers are lit. Yeah, okay, so I thought and They had a multi-million dollar empire their former chief chief of security quote We had a cash office and at times there was certainly more money in it than I could imagine people would send us mink coats diamond rings and deeds When you hear this sort of shit you really it all People would send us mink coats, diamond rings, and deeds.

When you hear this sort of shit, you really, it all, Trump makes so much sense in a way. It's just kind of the evolution of this like, I'll do anything, I'll believe in anything to make sure that I'm going to be okay. And just believing in the worst people, like the worst people. You got to wonder though, like, this is going to sound like I host a PBS show, but is it, are you, is that your plan going into it? Or are you formed when you see that level of success and money? Like, I wonder if you're going in there being like, I'm going to defraud people, or I wonder if while you're doing your thing, you're going, ooh, I should defraud people. No, you're going into it.

You're going in. Yeah, I think they know they're going to defraud people. So that's cool. So they bought, the bakers bought 2300 acres in South Carolina to build the water park named Heritage USA okay they're also preparing to break ground on a hundred million dollar ministry center the Crystal Palace in 18 sorry keep doing that in 1987 their security chief was with Tammy when she began hallucinating and stripped.

She stripped? Yeah. She didn't take her makeup off though. No, that would take too long. That would take a fire hose. So what do you think she's on? Stripping is very strange. Is that booze?

Could be booze. Yeah, could just be booze. I mean, out of all of it, it feels, it's either booze or some sort of hallucinogen. Well, what year is it? But I would think it's 87. So there could be, this could be ecstasy. Could be.

I've never experienced that version of ecstasy though. I've never like, it was more impure back then. Yeah, I've had the impure one. I guess I've had one. You were seven years old. I'm talking. No, I was doing it. I dated had one. You were seven years old. I'm talking. No, I was doing it. I dated Jerry Lewis.

Yeah, I don't know. It's very strange. I don't know. I would say maybe booze. Yeah, I think so. Quote, and I couldn't believe, also they're fucking, like, you know, they're repressed.

Some of them just want to fucking bang. And like, you know, there's a lot of that. It's real stifling. Yeah. Quote, and I couldn't believe I'm there by myself with this lady and she'd taken her clothes off and Tammy didn't do that kind of stuff around me. We all knew she had some prescription drug problems. There you go.

Pills and booze. Yeah, pills and booze. Her drug problem hits the press. Okay. Tammy, quote, I just had no idea, Jim, that you couldn't mix over the counter drugs. just had no idea Jim that you couldn't mix over-the-counter drugs. I had no idea So she took the hot take your clothes off drug, uh-huh, which is They I think they took it off like it's not over-the-counter anymore. You got to buy it prescription. Yeah, right But yeah, that was a big drug for a while. I like that one

Shortly after the story of Jessica Hahn broke Shortly after the story of Jessica Hahn broke, former church secretary, she said Jim Baker, I mean he raped her. Like if you read the story, it's fucking, the story is so, like it's textbook sex trafficking assault. Like it's- Grooming into- Yes, it's grooming, trafficking, assault.

Like just straight up, like it's textbook. How old is she when that she's like young? She's like 22 or something. She's pretty young Baker says is a consensual affair out of this Han became a celebrity. Also, let's just Let's just not forget how gross our entire society is. She posed for playboy. She's a freaking grass-dwn Howard Stern she's a music videos like on Howard Stern, she was in music videos. Like... No, it's fucking horrifying, man.

It really is now that we're approaching the kind of out in the open, coming out of America ending party. You are, those seeds that we've talked about for so long, it's like, yeah, well, what do you expect? I mean, we are a disgusting nothing culture Who's purely motivated by spotlight and greed? Yeah money? But even then when it was happening, I was just like what the fuck this is so weird. Yeah I think it took me a while to be like wait what?

Well, I was 47. I mean Jim remember you were involved at all Well, I was 47. I mean. No, I remember. Jim and Tammy. I remember you were involved at all. I was. Jim and Tammy decided to step down and hand the PTO over to Jerry Falwell. Oh, fuck me. What he didn't know at the time was the PTO was deep in debt

and we're spending over two million a month. Spending two million a month. They're probably paying tons of people. They're probably, everyone's living lavishly. They're building shit everywhere. Like they're just like, the money will never stop. Well, I mean, the beauty of the church is there's no tax. But if you have a room, yeah, there's no tax.

And if you have a room full of fucking mink coats and cash, of course you're gonna spend money. Oh yeah, you're the mob. Falwell and the bankers fall out over the debt and Falwell accused Jim of being secretly gay having several male relationships and said Tammy gave him a long list of demands including compensation to give Falwell full control of PTL. So Jerry gets in there, he's like, this is going to be sweet. And then he's like, oh my God, what a nightmare. give Falwell full control of PTL. So Jerry gets in there, he's like, this is going to be sweet.

And then he's like, oh my God, what a nightmare. They're not even running their Conwell. So they did do one good thing. The government looks into the PTL finances. The bankers- The government was like, Jesus Christ. What the fuck? The government has, the bankers have multiple homes, a private jet, two Rolls Royces, a Mercedes Benz, an air conditioned dog house. Jesus. The only purchase that makes sense. Yeah, I'm actually, on that one I'm on their side.

That one's okay, absolutely. So Jim is indicted on eight counts of mail fraud, 15 counts of wire fraud, and a count of conspiracy. During the trial, the employee who collected data on PTL memberships which were being oversold fainted. That's one way to do it. What a great way to get out of that. Yeah.

Okey dokey. You know what? Let's take a recess. I think that man is dead. A trial sketch artist quote, when he fainted, a voice from the audience came up and said, oh, he's given his life to God. Jim Baggans.

Shut up. Shut up. and said, Oh, he's given his life to God. Jim Baker's, Jim Baker's attorney called a gym up Jim, Jim, as if there's going to be a miracle and he can bring him back to life. Oh, like a doctor on the plane. Jim, Jim, Jim, do you have anything you could do? Like, do you have a magic glove or something you could rub on him? Oh? God they can't stop they can't ever stop they must have planned it they planned it They plan all right think that guy that guy Pretended to faint and they're like and then Jim will come up and save him and the jury will be like oh my god

Look at Jim's magic. Sorry. I didn't mean to distract from the trial. I don't know anyway you were saying I had a Diamond cutlery. Go ahead, I'm sorry. I just had to save that man's life. So Jim doesn't make it through the trial. He has a psychotic break. Bullshit. He hides under his lawyer's couch saying the reporters outside were giant bugs.

Well, if you're going to fake it. They're bugs. They're giant bugs. Jim? Jim? Jim the giant. Oh my God. Look at them.

They're all big bugs. That's just Tammy, Jim. That's just Tammy. I mean, yeah, they're trying everything. They're trying all their fucking- That is so, that's so close to I'm buying it. I'm buying it? The bugs.

Oh, oh. It's so crazy that I'm being like, maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this is a bug. Maybe this trying all their fucking. That is so, that's so close to I'm buying it. I'm buying it? The bugs.

Oh, oh. It's so crazy that I'd be like, maybe this is real. So you're like, oh. I think it's fake, but then the bugs thing is so great that I'm like, maybe. The bugs, the bugs thing is pretty great. Bugs is great. Yeah. Oh no, I can't go out there.

All those reporters are bugs. Don't you understand? Where am I going to go? They're bugs. Look at them. They made a hive. They're coming to get me. I can't go out there right now.

They're all bugs. Yeah, all right. They're bugs. People will buy that. Oh, they want a tape. They're coming at me. Look at them with their beady little eyes and their teeth. Look at that one. They're coming at me. Oh, no. He was committed to a psych ward

until fit for trial. I now know they were not bugs. After 30 days in a correctional facility, I have learned they were no longer bugs. Holy shit, are they not bugs? They're not bugs. Eventually... That guy might be a bug. Yeah, eventually he goes on trial and he was found guilty on all counts and given 45 years in prison and a $500,000 fine.

I fucking... Great about jail. Fine wise, at some point, it's not going to happen, but it'd be great to get our shit together fine wise What's the matter? Nothing. I just nothing We should find people like if they have millions of dollars that they've been never do it. They're always like it's a hundred dollars Yeah, it's never a fine That justifies never never it's like a fine that justifies. Never.

It's like you've got to be bankrupting. But 45 years in prison is great. But you've seen him on TV. He's on TV now. Like. Yeah, right. So how much time do you think you actually served? Oh, god.

They're always disappointing. Six. Five. Yeah. That's fucking stupid. Jail taught me that they were indeed bugs. While he was in prison, Tammy filed for divorce and quickly married the contractor

who had built Heritage USA. Wow. Who went to prison for bankruptcy fraud in the fallout of PTL. You might want to wait until the trial's over before you pick the replacement suitor. Jimmy was one of the fiercest critics of Baker's fall from grace.

So he just jumps on every single fucking person. Every person that's slightly got any kind of crack. Any biblical heat. You're gonna go in and say, I'm the good one, they're the bad one, follow me. He's Facebook. Because he knows. He's got Facebook.

Yes, but he knows. He's got Facebook. Yes, but he knows all those people are so susceptible and they will just immediately jump ship. They're looking for another, yep, another flower to fertilize. That's right. He called Baker, quote, a cancer on the body of Christ. That's really hard. That's really hard. It's going hard.

Yeah, that's, that's, that's good. You remember that that sticks with you. His, a crystal Leo, by the way. Don't. His new album is cancer on the body of Christ. I just ate. His new album is cancer on the body of Christ. It's got him on the crucifix like, yeah. We're one of the only shows that really is...

Goes after Delia? Yes. No, everyone should continue. I should point out that Kyle Anderson, who was on The Past Times, he made a Dilea doc that's incredible on YouTube called The Chris Dilea Problem. Yeah, it's great. And it's really, yeah, if you're a fan, it might be worth a watch. Let's just say the only thing they came after him for was music copyright.

With his big rivals gone, Jimmy can now become the top televangelist. Finally. Attorney General Ed Meese had released his famous porn report. By the way, I love the porn. Do you go to porn report? Yeah, I do. It's great stuff. It's a really...

They got good stuff. Did you just see the thing I posted? No. My wife likes to go out next door now just to read how crazy everybody is. She better make sure you're logged out. She sent me, so it's so God damn funny. Oh God, I have so many conversations here.

Okay, so this woman in our neighborhood writes, good evening, what's a relaxing hobby you enjoy after work? And some lady, Janet writes, crocheting, knitting, and Debbie writes, secondlife.com, Casey writes, gardening for me, and Edward writes, pornhub. God bless you, Edward. How does that work?

Are you able, do you have any idea who Edward is? No, it's just fully anonymous. No, they put your first name and last name up on it. Everybody is. So we all know that Edward's like either a perv or hilarious. He's hilarious. You know who he is. I don't know who he is, but that's, he's just being funny.

Like that's just. Yeah. I would imagine he's being funny, but I would also imagine some people would be like, that's in poor taste. Yeah. Edward. Edward is the king. Edwards crushing ever one that I wish I lived next door to yeah, we all do Okay, so So Edmises I Mean people who weren't alive for this. It's so fucking crazy

It's it's it's a thousands of of pages report on porn by the fucking attorney general. It's genuine, like everyone on the left and liberals were just like making it's just crazy. It's genuinely insane. It's a government report on porn. It's insane. It's insane. Um, inside of it, uh, inside in the report, uh, James Dobson said heavy metal was a form of porn, and Jimmy ran with that. Jesus Christ. He said it wasn't just the music, but also rock magazines. The only way you could try to thread that needle is that there's hot women in, like,

what year are we in? We're in the 80s this is I think it's a late 80s when this came out. So like music videos are out so like you're seeing hot hot like attractive women in music videos as well as you're seeing the rock stars are kind of glammed up see but I'm not saying I'm like, obviously, I'm just saying it's insane, but music-wise, you cannot be like, I'm gonna go jack off to Led Zeppelin. Well, yeah, they're just trying to tie it all together.

Yeah, they're trying to make it so that, take down everything that they view as anti-God or whatever. And definitely a lot of the metal guys were just like, yeah, okay, I'll lean into the yeah I'll lean into the devil shit. Yeah, just cuz it's right you guys are fucking idiots. Yeah a shout at the devil Yeah, I'm shit But there's definitely a lot of hot women are into metal. So there's tons of hot women are in the scene But Jessica Hahn was definitely in metal videos around the metal scene

No, what about because you were I don't know if people know that you were in a glam band called Antidote. Antidote, yeah. And like you were doing a lot of, you guys did a lot of shows on the Sunset Strip and stuff. So what, the vibe at that time when it comes to this stuff, that must be kind of a vibe shifter for... When they started coming after us?

Well, like you're kind of, you know, you're lobbed in there with like, um, all of the, you know, you're on a list of those 2030 groups and that's like the sunset strip crew. And then there, did you guys kind of galvanize around the fact that you felt kind of attacked from the right a little bit? I don't know if galvanize right where, but we, uh, we, first of all, we thought our record sales would go up. Um, did they? Yeah, they did. I mean, that's when I started taking the snake out of my anus on stage. Right. Which was like, you know, a nod to that. It was definitely.

Even the thing. Garden of Eden. And then sort of. Yeah. Yeah. And that, but if memory serves, that, when you started really pushing that during every song is when the sales did start to decline. I mean, yeah. You go through what, two, three snakes a show?

Yeah, and a lot of them died. Yeah. Yeah, a lot of the snakes died. Well, I don't know. But it was fucking metal. Yeah, yeah. No, I know. Super metal.

I know. I just know that when the right... Also, we would also, like, we would fuck on stage. The whole band. Well, yeah, we'd do, like, in between, like, a lot of bands would do, like, we would fuck on stage. The whole band. Well, yeah, we'd do like in between, like a lot of bands would do like a solo, but we'd have one guy fucking a lady. Oh, yeah, right.

And then we'd film it. So it kind of was porn. So he might've been like. No, that to me feels like porn. Not really. I think it is because it's filmed penetration. But it's pretty metal. But yeah, we definitely, we don't need film.

I didn't help the cause of it. We had a lot of closeups, yeah. Yeah, okay. But so, but still it's rock and roll, you know? No, I know, I just think, okay, I'm ready to, you know, move back into the. I mean, the band eventually broke up because one of our guys went up to Washington

and got fucked by a horse. I'm ready to get back into the scripted part of the show. Okay. Thank you. So Jimmy runs with it. He said it's not just the music, but also rock magazines. And in June of 86, Jimmy gave a sermon attacking Walmart and Kmart for carrying these rock porn magazines.

He's just going after all of them. Yeah, he's just going after all of them. He's just going after the marts. Because he can attack whatever he wants because he doesn't get money. Anything he attacks brings in more money from people who are sending in checks. There's some similarity to Scientology with the fact that if you're in the club, you're like.

Rest in cutthroats. Scientology with the fact that if you're, if you're in the club, you're like, brush and cut this. He also called the magazines quote more dangerous than hustler and playboy. Now that's crazy. Well, I mean, I had a probably two years of hustler at one point and I'll tell you, yeah, they show a lot there. But I also, this sounds crazy, but I genuinely was like, they had a very, their political leanings I really did like reading Hustlers do. Plus they gave you a DVD. And then they're also showing you close-ups of vaginas.

I were, I don't, that part to me, it just doesn't even, I don't know if they did that to the, did they get it the wrong one? I don't even remember. Well, he's saying this because he's saying that it's in a Walmart and a Kmart, so it's more accessible and more kids are seeing it and getting sucked in as opposed to a penthouse,

which you can't get at Walmart yet. So Hit Prater Magazine wrote about Motley Crue, and they described sex with groupies. The band the guys talked about. This is not going to be good. Jimmy claimed the article was read by a 13 year old boy. Quote, the smut business has moved out of the back alleys and the adult bookstores and into your family convenience stores like 7-Eleven?

I mean, all right, I'm just going back to when I was 13. There, definitely if I went into a 7-Eleven and I browsed the magazine zone and I saw one of these, I could probably do my business. Right there? No, no, no, I'd go home. No, but I, yeah, yeah. So, you know, picture a world in which you don't have access to porn at any time you want by pulling the thing out of your pocket.

Not the thing, but the phone. The penis. Oh. The penis. It's a different world. Dude, it was a different world. You did have to try to see it where you could. And it was definitely tantalizing to watch Walk By, if you're a kid, Walk By the newspaper

rack. Yeah. It was. It was like how an animal would like, you know, store food. It was like when you, when there was- Okay, now what's happening? No, no, no, hold on. It was, you'd be like, if you're like a hungry animal and you're not like hunting,

but then you see a place for food, you go, I'm going to eat now. So what am I going to do? Not eat? So you're, you got to take, hold on. It's like a squirrel storing nuts, except you're- I'm going to eat now. So what am I going to do? Not eat. So you're you got to take hold on squirrels. Do you take your shots? If you're you got to take your shots. So you're you got to take your shots.

Young Gareth is grabbing his playboys and his wheeze. Or my mental imagery or what? When I could get it, you'd store it and you put it in. You'd get it. Well, that's why we've all. Everyone's talked about forest porn. You're not house. Well, that's why we've all, everyone's talked about forest porn. And your nuthouse.

Well, that was a bit I had. Well, not by, okay, but it's true. Yeah, it is true. I remember when I was a boy, there was some fucking hero who was leaving smut on a log. And you'd go into the woods and you'd be like, this fucking dude left like four fucking weird pictures. True.

And you'd be like, yes. Yeah, I have a whole bit about it because it's true. It's an actual thing that happened. It was awesome. I still do that for kids. All right. He called there. We're going to cut it past pressing. No, no, no. Keep this in. I'm sitting there with the mags in the woods and I'm waiting for the boys to come over and I'm like, fellas, it's Christmas. It's come Christmas. Jimmy called rock musicians quote, preachers of perversion masquerading as musicians telling the kids that your parents or anyone else who tells you what to do is the devil. And you got to shout right back at them. And it doesn't make a lot of sense.

I don't, I don't like ending arguments with it. doesn't make a lot of sense. I don't like ending arguments with it doesn't make a lot of sense. I feel like you kind of lose your crowd a little bit. Preverted sex themes and actions on stage at all. Kid Corator, August 1984, carried a lead article about the group in which this particular man described some of the band's sexual escapades. He said the other day, we had this one chick in the van and she was hanging over the seat naked and what follows is a description in detail of varieties of sex acts performed by the girl on band members and vice versa. Language and depictions too obscene and graphic to include.

The story was sent to one particular organization by a parent who found her 13-year-old son reading the magazine. This magazine, I want to tell you something. Hipparader is a rock magazine that can be bought by children of all ages in places like Walmart, Kmart, the grocery store, and practically any other retail store that sells magazines. The schmuck business has moved out of the back alleys of the adult bookstores into your family convenience stores. Like 7-Eleven. 7-Eleven is like, bro, chill.

Boy, there's so many people there. You can hear a pin drop. Fuck, it's really packed. He's, you know, it's, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger.

Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's warning them of danger. Like, you know, he's so many people there. You can hear a pin drop. Fuck, it's really packed. He's, you know, it's, he's warning them of danger.

Like this is a dangerous thing. It's amazing to be doing this on the heels of Jim Baker. Yeah. Yeah. Just be like, hey, look out, these are your enemies. Right? You know. But I guess that's one of the reasons he did it,

to like take the, take the power back. Well, yeah, you're taking, but like everyone's like, what the fuck is wrong with these televangelists? And then you can do that and then it turns into a thing and everybody runs with it because ... Because that's how it is. Yeah, everybody in the media and all the politicians and everyone else is going to be like, yeah, he's right. Yeah, gives the right something to do while they're fucking taking everything away.

So Walmart executives spoke to Jimmy and then removed 32 magazines from their stores. Fuck me. Jesus Christ. Rolling Stone. What the fuck? Circus, Cream, Hit Parader, and of course, Tiger Beat. Tiger Beat, wow, that felt.

That's, yeah, that's about Tigers. I mean, that's like, how am I gonna jack off to the Fresh Prince? What did you say? Are we testing mics or are we recording? No, I think Tiger Beat is about Tigers beating off. No, no, no, you're way off. I'm thinking of a different Tiger Beat.

Yeah, that's different. You're thinking of Tiger Beat. I'm thinking of Tigger Beat. No. Oh, I love the thing that I played with it That's different. You're thinking a tiger beat. I'm thinking a tigger beat. No I played with it and it got super big and weird. Oh Is that honey not anymore it's not who bears someone has done something to my honey My friend I would give it another second

Mix it up a little bit it's the honey that the bottom the top is now no longer good Tigger made a creme brulee take a torch to it crisp the top he really focused on hit parader which he tied to drugs, venereal disease and homosexuality, et cetera. All the bad things that he in his mind. Every famine. Biblical floods. Quote, I don't listen to this music,

but people in my organization do listen to it for research. Oh my God, just sitting there. They give me printouts. Oh my god. Oh so weird. And it's mind-boggling what's going on under the guise of freedom of expression. Yeah no shit asshole. Walmart pulled comedy albums and rock albums including Eddie Murphy Richard Pryor Motley Crue Ozzy Black Sabbath Judas Priest and People lashed out. I mean, this is the whole thing We've talked about it before but it's just the full Streisand effect of this shit. Now you're in the fucking news

Like yeah, but I but the truth is that he's a lot of this is not even, it's not an in earnest mission because he probably knows this just stokes his flock harder. Absolutely. Yeah, he doesn't give a shit. Yeah, he couldn't give a fuck of a 13 year old whacking off to hit print. And the more a band gets mad at him, the more he gets fame with the God people. Especially in this era with government. Yeah.

I mean, you know. So it gets him all the attention he wants. He's on mainstream news. He's... It'd be great if he did an interview with Hit Parade. He's confronted on CNN's Crossfire and in an LA Times article, any attention is good for him. He now has a TV audience of 2.1 million, a ministry's complex worth 100 million and 1,500 employees and a college. Oh my God. And that's the end of part one.

Oh, for fuck's sake. Oh my God. Oh, is this coming out like this? Talking about this right now is particularly horrendous. Yeah. On part two, we break up what just a fire near me. It's my house. I'll teach you to talk about this guy. Hey, dollop fans, I know you love the dollop. You love listening to the dollop. Do you want to watch the dollop?

You're like, Gareth, what are you talking about? By the way, it's not Gary, it's Gareth. Well, we have partnered with Lakeside Animation and we are starting to animate some of our episodes. So if you want to go watch a five-part animation, which is actually like a 22 minute episode or 30 minute episode I can't remember of the Rube you can go to Lakeside animation on YouTube and watch a really awesome animation of the Rube it it really genuinely kicks ass and we're very proud of it and the more you share it the more you give it to people the more you follow Lakeside all that stuff the better chance we have of making a lot more of them.

We're already making a second one, so go there and watch the Rube.