The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 707 - Mike Lindell - part 2

Episode Date: October 28, 2025

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine Pillowman Mike Lindell. Part 2 of 2 SOURCES TOUR DATES OFFICIAL MERCH   Hims  Get up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com/go/dollop!  Momentous

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It's not. Well, my thing, it's... What? Oh, I see what's going on. Yeah, you know, you're right. My bad. You stupid. A little bar came up.

I apologize. Your head's not out of frame. Well, if there's one thing I've learned about you and your dad, it's if a little bar comes up. Lookout. Oh, it's good to have a giggle with friends. Should you of all people be bringing up my father? Why not?

Your dad was my dad. He's our dad. Your dad was our dad. Huh? You are the father slayer. In what way? You slay fathers. I love your father.

You slayed other people's. are you with me and there there's a sect of us we don't believe your dad's gone there's a lot of there's a lot to this idea that your dad has there are sightings of your dad in roanoke virginia and i have five guys working on it the burger guys and um there's a lot of smoke around the idea that your dad might not even be gone. You're very problematic. I want to reunite you and your dad. You're just a problem.

You and your dad, it goes, the order of reunions that I'm pining for are you and your dad and then you and Sam Cedar in that order. And part of me, part of me wants the three of you to sit down. There was a big discussion. read it about Sam and I our relationship and everybody got it wrong about why I stopped talking to Sam

but it was very amusing because everybody always thinks they know I know you think he killed your dad 2004 year of our Lord J-Town who by the way

has been riding the subway cars in New York and having a good time. What do you mean? So he's just a passenger on subway cars? Mike! People know what that means if they actually read and the dangers to our young teens. Mike Lindell had woken up in the middle of the night

and gone through a meth-like night of writing. Because of meth? And by that I mean, he was just writing over and over again. I'm going to know. invent a pillow and it's going to change the world. This is upsetting. And now he's going to do exactly that and he is going to change the world. He became obsessed.

His family almost immediately became sick of how much he talked about this pillow thing. So Mike starts going to bed, bath, and beyond because you've got to see the competition. Sure. And he goes in there and he squeezes pillows for hours. Oh, that's, that's a, there's surely a security camera zoomed in on him. At some point, it was like, this is, this is beyond shopping. This is the beyond. This guy is, he's making holes.

He's making holes. That's very, that's a lot of drug behavior there. Yeah. So when the manager came over to ask if he needed any help, Mike replied, quote, nope, just doing some pillow research. Nope, I'm just trying to fondle as many pillows as I can. And the manager pointed a mic to some of their most popular pillows, and Mike scoffed, quote, those pillows are awful. I'm going to come back someday with the best pillow you've ever seen, and you're going to sell them in your store one day. I mean, I don't own this place. I'll probably

be gone like four months, so. And the manager smiled and nodded at Mike. get out sure get out I don't really care sir so Mike made his son hand tear

pieces I thought that was his name no but that would be a good name for a kid hand tear he made his son hand tear pieces of foam into a hundred different types

of shapes in dozens of combinations until his hand-aaked. And it took it took months to finally find the right foam filling for the pillow.

These are different pillows he's having him do this too? No, different shapes of foam. So he's tearing little pieces of he's tearing the foam into little pieces then to figure out which pieces would be perfect to put in a

pillow case and make a pillow I guess I've never shredded a pillow on uppers so well I've always been a guy who down pillow fake down pillow or the you know the just the little fiber like foamy thing

I don't need a little chunks is that what he's going for chunks the pillows are chunky you've never felt on my pillow pillow pillow I can't say that I have They're awful. It's a chunky. It's chunky.

It's a chunky pillow. It's a chunky pillow. I didn't not know that. They're little, they're little, little bits of foam. Who knew? Now, is,

remind me, is he on drugs now or is he off trucks? He's still on drugs. Why would he be off drugs? I don't know. Yeah, yeah, you're right.

Thank you. You're right. The, so he, his son is doing that. And then the next step is for Karen and Mike to go down to Biloxi, Mississippi, to win enough money to make 250 pillows. So gamble.

Yeah, this whole, this. He's an Apple started. This is, this whole gamble, gamble your way to your dreams is, I mean, it is a fluky. Now, but he's counting cards. We got to remember he's a card counter. Thankfully, his luck turns around and he wins $14,000. And he, while he's still. And he gets noticed by a group of card counters who ask him to join and be part of his team.

So it's all good. It's all good. It's like the prestige, but with pillows and meth. Yeah. Mike makes the pillows. So he's got 250 pillows. And he enters the Eden Prairie Mall Show. Just a world we never knew existed.

It's one of the bigs. it was a disaster only a few people bought pillows and one of them demanded mike's phone number in case he didn't like the pillow i think that guy's the biggest loser of the story well well you're wrong because that man ended up loving the pillow gareth and he ran the minneapolis home and garden show so now he's got an inn sure And Mike changed his pitch to be a demo of how the pillow holds its shape while you use it and reconfigures when it's done. So it's made of all these different little pieces of foam in there and you put your head on it and you squeeze it or whatever you do with it. And it holds its shape. And then when you're done with it, it doesn't have that little concave part in the middle like some pillows.

You don't need to fluff. You get off it. It pops right up. It's the beautiful pillow again. And you don't have to fluff it. Could you back away from your camera a little? Because you're creeping me out. This is how pillowing should be.

You get back. This is what pillowing should be. This is why we pillow. You get back right now. So we've always wanted it in a pillow. You get back from your camera right now. That's crazy. People loved it.

What you just did? All of it. What I did, what he did, everybody loves the pillow. So he practically sells out $10,000 worth of product. Oh, boy. That's a lot of meth. Quote, when I was demonstrating my pillow, the hours flew by. That's correct. And I couldn't wait for the next day to start.

I'd found a new drug. Oh, my God. He replaced crack with pillows? Yes. What would you? Yes. And then he replaced pillows with Trump. You basically.

But don't give it away. All right. People don't know where this one goes. but that but he didn't give up on his old drug he just found a new one he's still totally good coke like of course and and also crack he's doing crack he's doing both i see i don't know enough about it to know that those two i feel like you pick a lane you can do you can do you can well of course you can but i feel like you've got whichever one you like better who's got your affinity you stick with that one cool guys do both that is a cool point and and the super cool

add a pillow in. The one thing you don't need while you're cracked out of your teeth is something to fall asleep on. That's right. It's interesting. It's an interesting invention for a crackhead to make.

A thing for sleep. Because he'd probably sleep on a wood table. Should we tell people the reason that the background looks like this if you're watching is because we're in the same hotel room in different rooms? We're in the same hotel that we're We got to, and we got here, and they said the elevator was broken.

And they put us on the third floor. That's not great. So what did I do? I left a bunch of wilted spinach in the lobby. Yes, you did. And then when I went down there, they were like, is this yours? And I was like, no. Did they?

Yeah. I was like, nah, I don't, what do you mean? Why would I leave that? I don't know what you're talking about. So one day, Mike is driving through Wisconsin with a truck bed full of pillows stacked three feet higher than the cab and tied down with bungee cords. I've done this, not with pillows. Yeah, I think we all have. I've done it with squirrels.

In the truck was a, quote, large personal supply of cocaine. Because you're going to a pillow show. You've got to, how are you going to get through it? got to get your sales powder yeah so he notices that a helicopter's been tailing him for are we really about to goodfellas my pillow well paranoia kicks in uh that's a that's a that's a that's a real deal we see a helicopter following you and um someone thought mike was smuggling something over the canadian border and called and um the feds did a comprehensive search of the truck but all they found were pillows because as soon as Mike realized there was a helicopter following him he

snorted all of the cocaine quote I've seen good fellas well to be fair maybe he's seen good fellas but he's not he doesn't remember it super well because he flushed it down the toilet so that's right so the problem with this story he turned his nose into the toilet if you have a weekend full of cocaine and you snort it, they're going to be able to tell and you're not going to get away with that. I don't know. I kind of feel like Mike is so special and chosen that he could do it. You know, well, you might be right about that. God did clearly choose him. I gave him big nostrils. So he gets my pillow into the Minnesota State Fair. And that's hundreds of thousands of people we're talking about. The big state fair.

And there were, there are huge lines just to look at one of those sweet, sweet pillows that he's made. Well, now we're really, now that's making Minnesota seem sad. Yeah, well, yeah. And the family makes tens of thousands of dollars a day during the fair. And my pillow sales tick up and up and ups, but at the same time, so does Mike's gambling. And then he has a really bad football weekend, and he owes his bookie $20,000. and he had heard of a mob hotline and you may have heard of this it's a mob it's a mob hotline where you pay five grand and then they'll tell you which games are fixed i've never heard of this

the mob hotline yeah this is really everybody knows about this it's a mob hotline and um so mike uh does that and he finds out that there's a college quarterback who's throwing a game Yeah, all college quarterbacks are throwing a game. And he, no. Of course they're throwing. They're the quarterback. He's, Garrett. All quarterbacks are throwing.

He's throwing the game. He's throwing the game. So Mike bets $25,000, which he doesn't have. He doesn't, you know. Right. So he goes on a hunting trip that weekend, and he's hunting and calling in to a betting line for the score. and it's going well. The team he bet against is down by 28 points.

So it's, you know, it's great. Sure. But then it's 2814 and then it's 28, 21. So Mike does something almost unprecedented with the mob. He called the manager of the mob hotline. Is there anything you want to flag? Well, that he's carrying the mob. I'd like to see the manager of the mob.

And he yells. I don't think that's allowed. And he yells, quote, what the hell is going on? The mafia guy apologizes. Hey, I'm so, I'm so sorry. What do you want me to do with you? You know, the guy, we, you know, okay. So this is what happened.

The mafia man apologizes and said the starting, the bribed QB, the starting. in QB, broke his arm, and the new QB is not in on the deal. Sure. Well, sorry. But you don't expect when you call, I mean, you call a hotline, you expect.

You don't expect them to, like, be on their heels. Yeah. Whoa, whoa, sorry. We're sorry. We're sorry. Look, we got a bunch of stuff we're fixing. We're sorry. I apologize to be a little man.

That was terrible. I'm so sorry. How about this? How about I break my legs? We're going to shoot the new QB. so the other team wins Mike loses Mike lost a game that was fixed

he's maybe the unluckiest I don't know about that Gareth he's now down $50,000 you know what's weird it seemed like he was starting to find himself with the pillows but he also just he's a real

he's got such an addictive personality he can't stop no So his bookie lets him pay it off on a payment program if Mike promises to never bet on sports again. So that's nice. That makes sense. That's what bookies do.

Okay. I don't really... It's a classic bookie thing. Sure. Yeah. Sure. He was so bad at betting that the bookie gave him an intervention. That's what we're saying.

the bookie. What is how? I don't think it's a bookie. Well, this is what it is. I don't think so. Any bookie that is just like, look, we're sorry. We're fucked up. Here, let me help you out, okay?

No interest rate. We'll give you a payment plan. It'll work great. Mike, we're all very worried about you. Me, Tony the Laces, Vicky the Stabs. I just wish you'd get your shit together, Mike. You got such potential on your, pillows are, they're so nice.

I love the idea that it's a chow's in little pieces. Mike, we need you in the pillow game, not the sports game. Vito. Vito has something he'd like to read. Mike, look, you've been an unbelievable gambler.

Take this moment and write it out. Unfortunately, Mike, if you keep gambling, I will not be able to be you'll bookie any longer. I'm creating my own bottom. What?

I'm sorry. So, Mike claims that after the bookie mob intervention, he hasn't bet on a game sense. It's so hard, it would be great to put him under

truth serum. Oh my God. It's so clearly fake that I like of course like the whole the whole the whole Christian like sort of circuit of redemption is is always just this amazing amount of bullshit but this is like this is cracked bullshit it's really crazy so um so mike and Karen have an annual Mexico trip that they do um I can't believe her name is actually Karen it's so good fellas Karen. So he doesn't cancel that because of what's going on. He's like, we need quiet time. We need time together. And, quote, a Mexican drug dealer promised him an unlimited supply of cocaine.

Because that happens if you're a pillow guy. Yeah. So they went with another couple for about a week. And he just thought about the cocaine and couldn't wait to meet up with his, quote, Coke promising dealer, a Mexican we called the Greek. Right. Great true story. A year earlier, he, quote, blundered into a situation that pitted rival dealers against each other.

I barely escaped my life, but the incident turned out well for the Greek. Now, in return, he handed over a few baggies of Coke. There you go. So weird. There you go. The goodwill that this community has is shocking. Yeah, I mean, it's weird how many, like, criminal guys. are so nice.

I bring up Forrest Gump too much, but this is like the gumpy retelling of being a Coke crack addict. It really is. It really is. Because listen to this. Blundered into a situation that pitted rival dealers

against each other. I barely escaped with my life, but it turned out well for the Greek, so he handed over a few baggag of his baggies of Coke. Yeah, that's just not how it works. No. And also, why would he give you Coke? Like, you stumbled into it.

What's I mean? Like, why would he? like the Greek would be like, yeah, fuck you. Yeah. But this wasn't the unlimited supply he was promised, but, you know, got the party started. Well, that's the one thing about cocaine. It's easy to ration.

That's right. So these four middle-aged Minnesotans are just doing lines and drinking coronas for a few days, but the supply is getting low. And Mike thinks he has one baggie left, but he cannot find the baggie. And he's looking everywhere. no coke. Have you ever gone through that? Yeah.

I've done that where I've been like, there's a bag, but there is Coke somewhere and you've done it. He tears the whole room apart. His wife and friends want a part of this and they go to the other room

to drinking out fun. If I was... Sorry, but if this was my origin story, this is where I would tear the pillow apart. And I was looking for Coke, so I tore the pillow apart into a thousand different pieces. And when I put it back again,

And I laid on it and I went, that's the comfiest pillow I've ever slept on. Yeah, that would be really good. It's just stabbing up with a knife and then he's like, oh my. Oh, my God. And reformed as soon as I got up. Pillow should be in little parts. Wait a minute. So he goes out looking for Coke.

It's 1 a.m. and he's power walking in the resort zone. And he heads into the shadier area. and he goes into this like little shack in a convenience store of a convenience store and there's a man standing outside and he asks Mike how he's doing and Mike says do you have any cocaine well he does he does have cocaine it turns out so Mike sat and had a bear with the man and then there's two other guys there also he gave him a hundred dollars and now the third man has a gun and then the second guy has something covered in a towel like a long thing covered in a towel and the first man keeps the first man keeps asking questions quote why didn't you buy

from a taxi what hotel you're staying at mike lies and said it's not not the one he's at was your wristband uh we didn't get an all-inclusive package for the resort the man finally dropped the act and said you don't you don't like the police do you and mike jammed his nose into the dealer's face and pointed at white flex of coke in his mustache do i look like a cop to you getting intent this is a good scene in the movie i really the pillow movie it really is it's so weird to know this guy from the pillow commercials only right Yeah, to have this intensity of the pillow guy. Yeah.

On the pillow, he's wearing the biggest cross ever. And he's like, I did everything I could to make sure that my pillows were perfect for you. And I was like, oh, sweet pillow man. And then the man said something that made Mike very concerned, quote, you look very familiar. Have you ever been here before? You look like a gringo from last year. he was with some enemies of ours so he's talking about the deal

that Mike stumbled into oh it's a little tense Gareth the man so the man had clearly been on the losing side of the clash with the rival drug gangs which Mike never actually explains in the book

he just kind of says I stumble he never goes in any detail about that what is essentially a crazy event that you would definitely put in a book yeah i think so um so mike is keeping up this like a grieved guy a bit and mike as if he's pissed said why don't you just give me the cocaine my wife is really going to be upset that i'm not back

yet so they waited another 10 minutes and uh mike asked if the coke is coming from a specific town ooh quote that was a huge mistake the name of the town wasn't something i should have known if I'd never been there. So the men leaped to their feet, surrounding me. In one motion, the second man unsheathed the mysterious object and pressed it against my throat. It was a machete. Oh, no. Are you scared?

Yeah. So Mike summons courage or the... Cocaine? What, yes, cocaine, a four-day Coke binge. quote, what's the matter with you? I'm not buying a sword. I'm here to buy cocaine. And you keep saying it's coming,

but it's still not here. He wrote this in a book. Right? Surely you could do better than that in a book. It's a really tremendously bad dialogue. Like it feels like the book is like really made up and invented in many parts. Like why would this,

why would he and I have a better line? mine. So I pretended that I was there to buy the machete. And then they all busted a gut and we had waffles. Well, and then the Mexican dude responds, and this is like straight, I have an episode he's pounding down. Quote, you seem a little loco, signor. He doesn't want to sell you his machete. He wants to cut off your head. Yeah, this is crazy. This is loco. It's so fake that it's just bewildering. Yes. And Mike says cut off my head.

My wife would have been really upset if you did that. Come on, guys. You know I'm here to buy cocaine. I'm out of Coke, and I came all the way out here to buy from you guys. And this is how you treat me, and that calms everything down. No. Yes. No.

This is all. They're killing. There's video. They want money. There's video. Yeah, they would kill them. So that calms everyone. down and one asked Mike for a smoke and as he pulls it out the missing bag of coke starts

to come out with it it was in his fucking pocket gareth it's not crazy so that's the most realistic part yeah it is that would make it really seem like a cop or what that would not make him seem like a cop what a fucking idiot get gareth cops have cocaine in bags in their pockets with the cigarettes wait a minute he does have coke he is a cop right wait what do we I don't know quote

I felt a sudden sadness this is where my addictions and bad decisions had led me oh Jesus Christ shut the fuck up this guy sucks this guy sucks

he's so bad at this guy who makes being a cokehead this boring God he's such a fucking he's not a loser because of his addiction he's a loser because he's like midway through a coke bender he just found more coke which is striking oil he's probably about to get other coke and he's like wait this is where

that's tomorrow thinking yeah that's tomorrow thinking that's not today thinking that no you're not it's not where you're on cocaine no no no I have way better coke stories than this um it was ridiculous I thought about it it all my decades of scheming and groveling to get that white powder only to lose everything to it in the end all that time thinking i was so smart i would beat the odds but now the game was over the house had won i was going to die right here on this i was going to die right here on this dark dessert street a small item in the news american turst goes missing in mexico it's intense but i don't think i don't think we'd even hear about it really you can really feel

But if you're, say, like a person out in rural Wisconsin and you read this and you've never done cocaine or really any drug and you've just kind of lived a very wholesome life, this sounds crazy. Impossible. But somehow, Mike uses an amazing sleight of hand to pocket the Coke before he handed over the smoke. Like he's a magician, Gareth. Yeah, sure. So they don't see the extra baggie. Mike has shook death. Once again, he's escaped death.

And then the Koki order arrives. He shouldn't so bad. Okay. He could barely get back to the hotel without snorting a big old, you know, honker. Yeah, okay, good. So when he gets back to the States, he is in Milwaukee for a show. And he's right back at it. He's probably a shank hall.

I made a series of addict moves that ended with me surrendering my wedding ring to one thug and when some guy pulled a pistol from a Frito's bag and pointed at my head my truck to another my truck to another does that mean by 5 a.m. I was being held captive in a hotel room. It's all a blur now but somehow I got everything back

and somewhere in there I got my crack. It was always about the crack. What a great writer. What a great writer to just leave that as a fucking hold memory. I don't remember anything, but I got it all back. Mike Lindell. But now, Gareth, crack is breaking apart the marriage. Karen is also doing crack, but they're on the rocks. Oh.

And they accuse each other of hiding crack and holding out on each other. Sure. And as their kids are growing up, it's harder to hide the habit, the Coke habit. Like, Mike would dip out during baseball games for a half hour to do lines off gross outdoor metal toilets. That kind of stuff. Of all the toilets, the bang gack off. Yeah, right?

Yeah. You're definitely snorting a lot of urine. Just dried old urine. Karen started spending a lot of time with her friend Steve, and it got to the point where on Karen's 50th birthday, Steve hosted the after party. and near the end of night when Mike said it was time to go Karen just told them she was going to stay with Steve that night.

I mean, you should know something's going on where a man is hosting the after party. Wait, what? And then after the other birthday, we're doing Karen AfterDock. Hosted by Steve. All right, Karen, let's go. Ah, no, I'm going to stay with Steve.

Well, it's pretty, fuck. It feels like an affair. It's not a fair. It's just fucking. me. Oh, all right. So Mike goes home that night and screams at his kids until they

left, and then he locked himself in the office and smoked a bunch of crack. But that's what he blew in that situation. I love this era of his life because it pretty much always ends with, he smoked crack. Everything. Like every chapter is just like, so I didn't know what to do, so I just smoked a bunch

of crack. Yeah. So Karen comes home the next day And she finds out what happened And she packs a bag She's mad at him Because he yelled at the kids Yeah And chasing the kids out

Even though she was fucking Steve Yeah Whatever She packs a bag She moves into Steve Just about the exact same time The power company cuts off the electricity Now remember

Remember the pillow? Yeah they've sold hundreds of thousands of pillows like they just did the Minnesota state fair he's yeah so Mike goes to see three times twice he punched through a window and once he punched Steve okay three weeks later Karen divorces him okay soon after Mike somehow buys a new house now this is subprime mortgage boom time so okay very possible and he moves in with a woman named Rachel. Okay.

And he leaves his kids at the old house because he didn't want, no, he, yeah, but he must have gotten the power turned back on, but he didn't want them to see that he was now a, quote, full-blown crackhead. I got, I got news for Mike Lindell. Yeah, right? They probably know you're a crackhead. Yeah, they probably, you probably, think of clues, all the crack, all the yelling about crack,

all the fighting about crack, all the fighting about crack. All the crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, the smell of the crack. The crack, crack laying around, cocaine around your nose. The pillow. There's a lot of crack. So he and Rachel have some big crack-fueled fights, and then they, she moves out. Now Mike's sad. He stops working, eating.

He even stops doing crack. He's just sad. I'm so sad. I can't even smoke crack anymore. Here's the craziest part. of the whole story. He says the doctor did a house call. What?

What do you mean? For what? Because he's in such bad shape. The doctor was like, you should probably do a little more crack. Yeah, I would smoke more crack. Get going. The doctor said he was in a, quote, walking coma where your brain has had so much trauma that it shuts down.

See, that's the doctor who shows up to the house. You're in a coma. You're waking coma. Sometimes he would go to the bathroom and sometimes he took slaps of water from the sink. But that was it. Nothing would snap him out of it. He's like a cat. Until a friend.

A friend dying of stomach cancer leaves his like health care situation that he's in. and brings Mike a tub of chocolate-covered popcorn. This story has so many moments of like, and then it happened. And then he just goes back to smoking crack. And they goes back to smoke crack, yeah. But this one, the guy brings up chocolate-covered popcorn. And that snapped Mike out of it. What?

Hello? Yeah, no, I'm just, like, pissed. The popcorn snapped him out of his walking coma. Mm-hmm. I'll repeat what? Yeah, this is now an established medical thing. They've done a lot of research. I'm going to give you a little chocolate-covered popcorn

and that'll get you right out of this. It was touch a go until we gave him chocolate-covered popcorn. Gareth, this business phone rings. His business phone? This is right after he snaps out of it. Right after the chocolate popcorn. And a woman. I'm the president of bedding.

Says, quote, I don't want to buy a pillow right now, but I was praying. And God let me know that what you're doing is so important. You can't give up. Who is this? Hello, who's this?

It's a woman. I'm a woman. Who's this? I'm a praying woman. I pray a prayer, a woman who pray. she keeps talking good and then she started praying for him while mike did lines of coke on mute you definitely got a mute an hour and a half later the phone rings again quote god's called me to pray for you what you're doing is very important and you can't give up

this is intense this isn't yeah no this is some real fucking shit i don't know about that part but it's definitely intense three a m the phone rings again this time it's a guy quote were you talking to my fucking wife earlier you piece of shit let me tell you something pal i don't believe in god but i kept having a dream that i am supposed to call you and tell you that we're What you're doing is important to God. I hope these dreams stop now, you asshole. This is intense. It's a nightmare.

This is like the three ghosts who got a visit. No, it isn't. It's exactly like that. It isn't because it's three people calling on the same timeline. It might be a little more intense, actually. Don't agree. I really, I've not liked Mike Mendel, like Mike Lindell for this whole thing. I hate him now.

Now I hate him. I hate him because of his book. Because he was visited by Christ. No, he wasn't. That's not even what this said. The phone rings again at 8 a.m. And my cancers. Hello?

Quo, let me guess. You don't want to order a pillow? You want to pray? And the woman on the phone said, how did you know? How did he know? Because he made it up. Gareth, because the message of God was getting into him at this point.

He made it all up. At 11 a.m., the phone, he only used for internet access, which is attached to an answering machine at this point, rings. And there was a robotic woman's voice. Hello, I love your pillows. I am here on behalf of guys. Mike this is a message from God everything you've experienced in your life will give you strength to get through the next month holy fuck this guy is really disturbed this is quite a night

it's not it's no it's one thing to like have this happen quote unquote to you it's another thing to be like this is my book this intense right like he really believes him he fancies himself important later that day Mike got into a fight with his girlfriend, Rachel, and she called the cops, and they came to arrest him. It'd be great if one of those phone calls, he's like, let me guess. You'd like to talk about my pillows and God.

I know, it's just Frank Sherber. We're for the police department. We're about to break your door down unless you actually give yourself up. Oh, okay. Well, Mike stole her car and fled to Minneapolis. Fucking hilarious that on the day when you get four phone calls

about how God sent people to call you because of your pillow. you're also doing Grand Theft Auto Well, he had a reason He just didn't steal the car He had a purpose Oh, he's on a mission He was going to find his crack dealer

Quote He might scare you if you ran He might scare you if he ran into him alone On a dark street But he really was the nicest guy So all these people are calling Telling him that he's the chosen pillow daddy And that same day

He stills a car to go crack well no he wants to meet up with his crack there's a nice guy to get crack and to talk about stuff probably sure emotional emotional connection can I walk you through some fall pillow options so Gareth Mike does crack without sleeping for two weeks straight good good and on the 14th day two higher high high up level dealers show up. The apostles. And one said, quote, Mike, you need to go to bed. We're cutting you off. This is just not how drug dealing works. This is what dealers do. This is exactly what they do. This is exactly what they do. The mom doesn't hold an intervention for you and drug dealers don't

suggest and insist you quit drugs. This is what life is like out there. It's just terrible. It's just crazy. He said, he told Mike he would wait Mike out. He did let Mike finish his last little bit of Coke. And then he sat with him. He's going to, you know, make him get sober. But then the dealer fell asleep and Mike snuck out. He probably had one of those lovely pillows.

But he gets out on the street. Why wouldn't he do that? In this bullshit, why wouldn't he bring a pillow with him and be like, I wish I got one crack at punching this book. up i'd be like i took my pillow down there and it was like as he was like trying to wait it out he fell asleep on the pillow meant like the single layer dow comforting pillow yes yeah you're right so mike's out on the street looking to buy he's begging he's pleading he's offering to pay double is it possible for me to suck your dick for a crack crack didn't i

pie a pillow off of you yeah probably gareth no no sell to him Word is out. Yeah. Like I'm a no-fly list. He's not allowed to buy. This is what happens. This is how when the crack dealers decide they're going to help someone, they all fucking get together.

I'll tell you what. They're quite a community. So he said his come down was the worst of his life. He was sleeping on a floor for two days. And then after two days. This guy has a pillow empire essentially. And he's just passing out of him. rugs. He bolts up and he is like, oh my God, I'm supposed to turn in a signed contract to a

wholesaler for my pillow or it's going to ruin the company if I don't and I have to do it today. So he rushes to the facility office, whatever it is. And unfortunately, there's a cop there waiting for him. And Mike's like, I just have to hand deliver this contract. And if I don't quote it's going to change the course of history my pillow is a platform for something so important in the future something to do with God

so the cop lets him because you can't get in the way of that it sounds like they were just doing a windy city heat on him like the way this plays out like for him to go up to a cop be like you don't understand I have to do this to save the future of betting and the cop's like

All right. So after this, Mike goes into a year-long spiral, he loses his girlfriend, his house, his friends. No, no, Dave, he's only been on a spiral. It just started. His friends is just starting. His brother, his son moves out. This is what I mean. This story keeps having these moments where he's like, but then Mike went and made the delivery of the contract.

And then Mike went to rock bottom. But what, like, then Mike got chocolate covered popcorn. And then Mike smoked a bunch of crack. But then the mom told Mike they weren't going to let him do any more gambling. Mike did more gambling and started to smoke a lot of crap. And then he punched his girlfriend. Um, pretty much everyone and everything that he's ever loved, just stopped putting up with all this crackhead shit.

And eventually, in the beginning, at 2000 a line in 2009 he lost the money to keep my Pillow going. So he loses the money to keep my pillow going and everything just kind of grounds to a halt. So

that to him is like his platform for God via pillows. Well, he really abused it. So that's what drives him to quit, finally. Quit drugs. Finally.

Yeah. Yeah, he just he just quit he uh no struggle no traumatic episode he just woke up in the morning and didn't want to do booze or crack and that was it okay he's not even he's such a bad writer he couldn't even come up with it he couldn't just make that the one because he made so many of them and they were all so insane that now he needs a big one and he's like god who who published his book? I bet it's self-published.

It has to be self-published. Look it up. What's it called? Fuck, I care. All right, here I got it. Hold on. You can keep reading. So he moves into his sister's place, and he starts going to church.

Lindell Publishing. There you go. Lindell Publishing. And he's the narrator for the audiobook. Oh, no. That has to be fucking incredible. That has to be. And there I was.

Eating ass. So he loves church. He's loving it. Good. Good for him. And then his personal life starts to take it off. But the business is not going well. There's two investors.

And they're trying to take the company away from Mark because he's been a crack addict. Yeah. And they wanted a company. not run by a crack addict. Right. And Mike miraculously gets $30,000 to fight back. How? I don't know.

Okay, there you go. Don't worry about it. Why not? Okay, great. Good. Thanks, buddy. Some things aren't important. So the two parties were going to the same shows and competing with the same pillows.

And the investors were going after him, low blows. once as Mike walked by one guy worked the Mike like a carnival barker quote hey everyone there's Mike Lundella my pillow we've sold thousands

and thousands of pillows but Mike ruined his business because he's a meth addict and Mike yelled quote it was crack get it right wow good comeback Mike way to go smooth

it was actually a harsher drug they filed the false police report they claimed Mike had come to their booth to harass and intimidate them. But luckily Mike had a credit card, timestamp at the exact time that they said he was at their table, saying he was at his table, so they lied.

They told everyone Mike was a filthy addict, couldn't be trusted. That's true. Yeah. They're the good guys in this story. Well, I mean, they're certainly not the bad. Mike, you certainly, it's not. They're not speaking out of class. No.

They're allowed to say that. Instead of fighting back, Mike leaned in and made his crack addiction part of the My Pillar brand. That is a crazy thing to hear. In a Christian redemption sort of way. And people laid it up. And he buried those two investors. Well, so they were like, they were like outing him for being a crack addict, which is totally fine.

I mean, that's what he was. And then he's like, I'll just run with that. Oh, you're right. I am a crack addict. Everyone's like, this is awesome. Ah!

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Just keep, keep, I don't know. I just, I do them every day. Whether I'm working out or not, I just, I do love creatine and, and the chews are the best. So I'm, I'm a chew man. Well, the chew sounds a lot easier than powder. Each chew delivers one gram of Creepure. It's a little food. Okay, that's weird.

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craveable, chewy little format thing. That's right. All those terms are medical. yes they are for me yeah um so gareth recommends it i'm going to start doing it as i've been working out a lot and uh caught you in the gym earlier you a little cutie pie uh girl you did uh so why do you not do what garth does what why do you not wear bottoms right now momentus is offering our listeners up to 35% off your first order with promo code dollop go to a live momentus and use promo code

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First, a quote, skinny, long-haired cowboy, grizzled with years, told millions that my pillow was one of the best inventions in history on par with fire and the wheel. That's fucking amazing. That was Don Imus. Oh, my God. Oh, Christ.

Some old, weird racist. Oh, let me tell you. This is actually one of those unbelievable pillows that I put my head on. These are, uh... Now, granted, I've said that Edward on air a couple times, but those pillows are remarkable, okay? You're going to fall asleep on his pillow.

I got to tell you, I love this guy's story. This guy, he's a, uh... He has a meth head. Okay? Here's a big meth guy. He's broken crack. And he somehow came up with one of the greatest things you can ever sleep on, okay?

And then the other thing that really helped, the big, big, big event, he did an infomercial. My pillow was one of the most successful infomercials in history. Yeah. And so sales just skyrocket. And the company goes from 20 employees to 500 in under a few months. I hate this because it's like so simple.

He got an infomercial. Yeah. And now he's like, I should be, let me tell you who should be president. I talk to God. Mike was literally hiring guys off bar stools. He gave ex-con prisoners, low lives, and deadbeats a second chance. He hired a hot blackjack dealer to be his executive assistant. He's definitely, what, this is all because he's still doing all of it.

yeah he's surrounding himself but yeah he's surrounding himself with people who can just get him crack easy and like he'll let him gamble yeah um so he hires his hot black jack dealer to be his executive assistant and then marries her within a month okay i will try to find the email but i'm pretty sure someone sent me an email this week that said that someone in their family worked at one of his companies and it was a fucking nightmare because of all the people that work there oh i can only imagine Well, he actually has no real CEO experience. Not that you need to have that, but the only thing he's been running is from the cops. Yeah. His sister, Cindy, meets a woman at a Christian conference. I'm looking at his wife.

She just goes up to Cindy and said, quote, Hi, I'm Kendra. I don't know why, but God wants us to keep in touch. Oh, my God. And that happens. That's just... Look, look, look. That's normal.

Crazy people hear God in that way. You're allowed to believe. You're allowed to pray. You're allowed to have all that. It's great. Good for you. Enjoy it. But you're not allowed to be like,

so God said I have to come over here and say hi. That's where it's like, what? What are you doing? You're on crack. Well, you're not Cindy, buddy. Because Cindy immediately knew this is the lady for Mike. Now I remember Mike, just married the blackjack dealer well here's the funny thing about that gareth it only lasted 20

days now who was this that he was married to a blackjack dealer what was her name oh we don't know okay she said she wasn't in love with him quote also you're boring okay so just to push back if there's one thing mike lindel is not it's boring think he's all of the above he's crazy yeah he's crazy not boring way no i don't i think he's boring i think that he is a combination of boring and crazy yes okay so he needs money my pillow is bringing in millions but mike is ignoring the business in favor of his uh his hot his hot wife we didn't have that for that long so sales were lagging as cost skyrocketed. He couldn't cover payroll.

So what are you going to do? He goes to a blackjack table to count cards. I mean, this is what you do. Sure. But he got the worst streak of luck he's ever had. If there were 20 small cards and all this guy's life is a streak of luck. This is the story of a white man in America. I mean, this is a guy who keeps failing and keeps getting every opportunity ends up running a pillow

He's a pillow magnate And he still doesn't know what the fuck to do So he goes to a blackjack table He doesn't hit And he's like gosh What am I going to catch a break So So he'd get the face

If he had 20 small cards In one face card He'd get the face card every time It was just he was counting cards But it was failing And even with 1,000 still to gamble He went to a different casino in Iowa And while driving, he hears a booming voice.

Quote, go to church tomorrow. You are done with gambling. Four days ago, you played your last card. Smoke in the pipe. That's scary, right? Yeah, it's super scary. The next day in the sermon, he heard it again. Quote, you are done with gambling.

Don't worry about counting cars to cover your company's expenses. A little while later, you heard again, quote, you will meet Kendra. She is the one through her. You'll become closer to me. Now, look, if Mike Lindell had brought us world peace by now, he did. This story would like him, like him.

like God being like this is your wife might make sense but he's just a crackpot well he heard that and he started crying he started weeping and the parishioners saw him

and they started repeating hallelujah and then they all placed their hands on him and when he finally left he said he felt genuine Christian love it's a great story it's not really a story Then, he then, I don't know what he's doing in Laguna Beach at this point, but then he inexplicably just flies.

He flies Kendra and his sister Cindy out and they hit it off. But they took it slow, which was befitting of a woman of the Lord. And she was woman of the Lord, Garrett. Fingers only. Well, only in the butt. Only fingers in the guard hole. Let me explain to you how much of a woman of God she was. She was in the airport, and she pointed to a stranger and said,

I've got to pray with him. And then she told the man, quote, the Lord's telling me, I need to pray for you. And the man burst into tears. So think about that. He'd probably work for Boeing. she knew my pillow was in a deep hole

they owed six men in about six months and she said Mike had to fire two of his closest high low high level executives shocking what what shocking

how terribly he runs a business yeah it's crazy it's just fucking amazing he owes six million dollars yeah and it's doing six months that's why you don't hire five million 500 employees right away

you don't hire 500 crack addicts yeah no no so kendra's like okay you got to fire two of your closest high level executives and mike's like okay and um after a few days of confrontation they resigned and mike dives back in and taking care of the my pillow business uh looks into every aspect he's been ignoring and by july in july sorry he said by the end of the year we are going to have $8.2 million in the bank. Okay, now where do you start that? That's like a, where are you going to start? Well, Gareth, you start laying off hundreds of people.

Yeah. Because you've got to make money. Yeah, absolutely. That's how you do. It's called doging. So they slash and burn and they get the debt down to about $2 million, but it's November and they pretty much need the money immediately. and Mike is in a deer hunting stand in Minnesota and he's frankly updating the sales graph

on his phone when he just sees this crazy huge spike of sales he's talking now talking on the phone is against the rules of deer hunting you're not supposed to because he scared the deer away so you're not supposed to be on your phone yeah but he called his media guy anyway and the media guy said two words explains everything fox news the midterms had just happened republicans retook congress and the old fox news audience was riled up and they want to support a regular schlub guy who's like them with a product with a guy with a gambling addict. Mary's women based on the booming voice behind him, has been there five or six times.

A product that is proudly made in America. Yeah. And Gareth, that's my pillow. Well. So Mike takes the last of his company's money and buys Fox ads. And it pays off, dude. They rehired a lot of people they had fired and ended the year with a bank balance of Gareth. I don't know if you can believe this.

8.2 million. No, 8.19 million. Shut up. But that's basically 8.2. It is. Girith. He knew because God told him. How did you just say my name, Gereth?

Who cares? He heard God. And God was like, 8.2 billion. He heard God. God talks in numbers. The Fox News element is not helpful. I'm touched. Yeah, you are touched.

Whoa. So next, Mike did what any rising conservative does. He made friends with Stephen Baldwin. Okay, dokey. Stephen Baldwin, by the way, for those you don't know, not doing great. not doing it really ever it's pretty bad now

quote he became like a brother well he's got enough of those yeah he does have a lot of those they're all not well actually two of them are okay Stephen went with Mike to the federal enforcement

Homeland Security Program awards gala great do you want to hear that again sure the federal enforcement Homeland Security Program awards gala.

Yep. And he went with him because Mike was being honored. And for anyone who's like, hey, America's cooked in the stupidest place of all time, this was like 10 years ago. Mike was honored with the Patriot Award for his foundation assisting ICE agents and other feds during their time of need. Oh, my fucking God. During their time of need.

Their time of need. The level of victimization we have been doing for ice the whole time. It's insane. It's insane. Like when we're like these poor bastards. These poor guys, they're just, you know, that some people are trying to find out where they live and are attacking them and tackling them. So he gives a speech. His speech is awful, but it started his sort of integration into the world of right-wing celebrities and political figures.

Mike's not political He's never been political up to this point He's been too busy You know smoking just an insane Yeah I mean he's like more crack Guy But now he's sober and he's religious And so he falls right in

With the right wing movement He asked questions mostly He would go on like right wing radio programs And he'd ask questions of the hosts And it turns out on every issue He was conservative just common sense you know common sense thinking there's no record of him talking to a liberal or a

lefty just you know just kind of all worked out in february of 2016 he was invited to the national prayer breakfast now he really did not like Obama comparing the epidemic of islamic jihad to the violent past of Christianity yeah that is that's not super uncool he saw it as quote taking Christians down a peg yeah which you don't do no no no and then afterwards he was part of a select group who got to meet Ben Carson our greatest brain surgeon

that's exciting remember how Ben Carson had the story of how he stabbed a guy yes in the chest the guy was saved because of a belt or something I don't remember why Yeah, there is a crazy story of him saving someone. So that one moment of Ben Carson's life is so far the entirety of Mike Lindell's life. That story of Ben Carson is the most normal story that's been in this episode. Mike was so nervous that he couldn't talk to Ben.

He was just like frozen up. I mean, who wouldn't get butterflies around? Ben Carson. Guy's fucking awesome. So Baldwin asked Mike what his presidential slogan to be. Was it Ben Carson the head of HUD for a minute?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that worked. There you go. So Baldwin asked Mike, what is presidential slogan to be? And Mike said, quote, vote for me, and I'll put the R

back in Washington. Help. What? What? What does he mean? Do you not get that? No. So in some parts of the country, and I don't think it's where he's from.

Oh, wash. But in some parts of the country, they say Washington instead of Washington. Like, it's like an accent-y thing. Fucking. Okay. I hate it. I hate what he said. After that, Stephen Baldwin got Mike invited to the 2016 Republican National Convention.

I can't believe we got to put this fucking body at the floor of Stephen Baldwin. And he got to sit next to the Trump family. Oh, God. Now, Mike has a religious vision that he would one day meet with Trump. And that was reinforced when he found out that Trump knew about him. So whenever a TV show that Trump was watching went to commercial, Trump would point of the TV and say, quote, watch, it's going to be that pillow guy. Watch, it'll be that pillow guy again.

so Trump is just watching Fox News and he loves a shuckster. Yeah. And he's like, this guy's great. He does what I do. This guy's full of shit. That's all it is. The premonition was building towards truth. Mike prayed, God, I don't know what's going on here, but please just show me.

And just then he gets a text. Trump wants to meet. Mike weeps. It seemed like God it's supposed to be. directly to me in real time. I mean, this is incredible stuff. We really, he should have been euthanized.

He's like a rabid animal. He just, he's done no good. He's a little too, he just needs to be institutionalized. I shouldn't, I shouldn't say that. He needs to be in a room full of soft pillows where he could just kind of bouts around. Are you talking about Trump or are you talking about Lindell? I'm talking about Lindel.

Trump should be, let me tell you something. Trump should be exploded. No. No, no, Trump should. not be even a lindel is playing out exactly the way we want them to it's beautiful let's just get to the end because it's great um but trump exploded no trump had the trump thing's not great but the lindel story is fantastic okay um so in new jersey just days before the meeting mike is a nervous wreck um what am i going to say to him what am i going to do he's checking his

breath he's got bonaca Oh, God. Chewing on a pillow. Oh, God. Yeah, he's practicing the double dance, the double fist dance. But things keep happening that calm him down. Like when he was at lunch and two women came to his table and said, quote, you have something very important coming up.

And we want to pray with you that whatever it is, it goes well. What the fuck is this shit? It's just what Christians all tell each other happens. It's so fucking weird. Well, it's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy.

And did, so to all these Christians who like him, like read that and they go, that's what actually happened. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. It's so easy to lie. Like, why don't we just become a Christian podcast? I mean, we're not, but no, it would be way better. If we wanted to, I mean, if we went right, oh my God, it'd be a great, it'd be a great five years. We'd make so much. We'd make so much money. Yeah. So the meeting started. with Trump looking at the big cross Mike wore around his neck and asking, quote, are you a Christian? Well, that's a classic Trump.

They discussed manufacturing and advertising and addiction and might describe Trump as down to earth and focused and practical. Now, the meeting ended when a man came in singing, for the best night's sleep in the whole wide world, visit my pillow.com. and Gareth, that man was Rudy Giuliani. Oh, God. The man who shit his head. So Mike goes home and he is

It's really amazing that it's just Fox News idiots. Yeah. Just like people who like like a My Pillow slogan. Yeah. Yeah, it's crazy. So he's now a Trump convert. Like he's falling in on Trump.

Trump. he's a Trump man and everyone needs to know it now and he has the perfect platform a pillow company yeah that is actually the perfect that's the perfect platform now

the corporate attorney the My Pillow attorney warned him quote it will cost my pillow dearly yeah but that's that's a sacrifice yeah it is it's worth it

absolutely Mike said we didn't get this far by me not listening to God well to be fair Mike, we got pretty far despite you smoking crack and marrying blackjack deals all the time. The next day he sent out a press release

about his support of Trump. Wow, what a fucking weirdo. He makes pillows. Like, what's happening? Yeah, like, that was the thing the whole time. You were like, I don't care. Shut up. Like, it just made me be like,

all right, I won't use your pillows. Oh, fuck. It's just so weird. I love Trump, okay? this led to multiple media this led to multiple media outlets calling him racist and evil that sounds about right

this was Mike's what I mean that's also like you know it's just hilarious the right away everyone's like you are a racist piece of shit he's like I make pillows like he just makes pillows this was Mike's quote

first glimpse of how unfair the press can be you know what a choice protect his business or go all in on Trump. And the first place, his path directed him, was Las Vegas to watch the presidential debate between Trump and Hillary. Now, he did not know he was going to get invited into the spin room, but he was.

And a reporter asked him, you always wear a cross, what do you think of the Access Hollywood video? And Mike said, he responded, quote, I was a crack cocaine addict Well, it's one good way to take the heat off of a grab-in-by-the-pussy tape

Wow. That is so... That's an answer to a different question. That's such an amazing answer. What do you think about the grabbing by the pussy tape? I smoked crack. Okay? All righty, then.

Okay. We'll be right back. I don't know. Spin room is that. I don't know if he knows what the spin room is, everybody. Certainly. I mean, he's spinning out of control.

Mike soon got a call. This is when he's in Vegas. Trump is holding a surprise rally in Minnesota the next day, and he wants Mike to go there and speak. Hometown boy, right? It's supposed to take place at an airplane hanger. Now, the crowd, was like miles wrapped around for miles like a huge crowd and Mike's absolutely terrified

he's going to be addressing tens of thousands of people plus millions are watching at home and he has no idea how and he just asked God for help and then a woman approached him oh Jesus Christ Mike I'm Michelle Bachman you look like we need to pray see that helped him that helped him Michelle Bachman does help nobody

Michelle Bachman has her eyes haven't closed she did she did help she did help George Bush become president yeah that was cool when he was out

in the bright light speaking about how he used to be a crackhead the audience went crazy they loved it he shed his fear of public speaking and he went out to speak at universities and businesses and political rallies and Gareth Trump won.

Thank God. Mike is at the party and he's got it all now. He's got fame. He's got fortune. A relationship with a woman who wants to sleep in separate rooms, which everyone wants,

and the divine love of Christ. That's perfect. Well, I mean, you know, with pillows that comfortable, you want to get two rooms out of them. So he lives the next few years just like... Coasting. You know, he's coasted.

Everything's sweet. He's the My Pillow guy. Yeah, he was. He was, I mean, he became like an advisor. Yeah, basically. He was all over the place. Yeah, which makes sense. Yeah.

It's tough. Then the 21, then the 2020 election comes. By 2020, he is. By all accounts, it just probably would have been better for Trump to win. Yeah. Just get it over with it. Maybe it would have been a little. he wouldn't have had four years off to plot

so my question about Christian by November 2020 that turns him into an evangelist of proselytizing the gospel of election fraud he is that is his new religion well for those who don't know Trump lost that election oh yes so suddenly he is everywhere claiming the election

had been stolen by Democrats. So Chinese hackers had wormed their way into Dominion voting machines and stolen the presidency from God's chosen candidate Donald Trump. Everybody knows that. Yeah. And for those

who don't remember or aren't familiar, he, anytime he was pressed, he came off as very unprepared and quite stupid. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mike did all he could to keep the Lord's president in office. And as far as he's concerned, everything's on the table. Just a few days before Trump left the White House, Mr. Pillow Man showed up to the West Wing with a stack of notes. And on the top page, it said, quote, martial law if

necessary. So he gets it. But he did. He got addicted to Trump. Trump became a drug, which happens with addictive personalities. Yeah, right. So even though Trump does leave. the White House. Mike doesn't stop. In February, he debuted a two-hour documentary called Absolute Proof that he made in five days. I wonder how he made that so fast. He stayed up for five days straight to work on something when that's usually aided by a chemical substance. Yep. Trump. But nobody has any proof that he's using again. But boy, boy, what an interesting thing to do. stay up five days straight to make a documentary.

I mean, you've got to be on something to believe all of it. Strangely, the documentary was so bad and full lies, especially about Dominion voting machines that both Vimeo and YouTube pulled it for spreading misinformation. Dominion threatened to sue. I mean, you get the Vimeo, Yank.

Dominion threatened to sue, and Mike said, quote, then sue me. Okay. So Dominion, two weeks later, file the one point three billion dollar lawsuit against mike and my pillow for defamation he asked for it one point three billion he as well as fox news yeah they claim mike quote continued to maliciously spread false claims that dominion rigged the election despite repeated warnings so the lawyers noted that mike promised absolute proof but never delivered anything but

fake documents and then Mike tried to counter sue but a judge just was like that's frivolous and they charged Mike for all

the lawyer's fees Mike then put on a highly publicized two-day cyber symposium this is to get everything on the table

get all the evidence on the table yeah any any later now I this is a pillow this guy makes pillows this guy made pillows

gone crack I just. Yep, that's who he is. That's what he did. So, yeah. So he lays it all out for everyone to see, which you'd think it would have done in the documentary. But, okay, so exactly how China and the Democrats stole the presidency using key election data as proof,

he was so sure of himself that he announced a $5 million, prove me wrong challenge. Oh, gosh. and he was immediately proved wrong and a computer scientist showed that Mike's election data was inauthentic and Mike had to pay him $5 million. Oh my God. Oh, my God.

I can't believe he paid. Oh, that's awesome. That guy must have been like, oh, I can't wait. I didn't come on. So Mike relentlessly bullied the state of Idaho into doing a full recount, even though had Trump had won Idaho with 67.2% of the vote. But he still bullies them into doing,

because he's like, then we'll see the machines are lying. But he won. Mike said all 44 Idaho counties have been hacked. Now, one problem with that is that seven of them don't use voting machines. Well, potentially that's, That still makes sense. Smuggle a crack.

That'll work out. So they do the recount and it determines that it's accurate. The initial count is within 0.1% of the... So he's wrong. And they charge Mike for the recount that they did. It feels like some bills are starting to pile up. in 2022 mike was sitting at a drive-thru line at a kansas hearties when fbi agent surrounded his car and seized his cell phone as part of the federal investigation into a potential breach of

voting system technology now that's not going to do because he'll get pardoned if he if that like oh yeah now nothing will all of that all everything from then at this point is you know null and void really yeah Mike said he had quote enough evidence to put everybody in prison for life 300 some million people

which I don't know if you know how many Americans are but that's 90% of Americans it's pretty crazy so we're all kind of this crack kid's real good yeah this crack kid really knows what the fuck he's doing

later that year major retailers coals and bedbath and beyond drop my pillow from their stores costing mike roughly $100 million so i'm i'm just trying to start i'm just trying to keep track of some math over here it really feels like this business is going to be crashing out now i think it's poise right where it should be yeah it gets in a good spot yeah Mike started his own social media service called Franks social. Now, for those of you aren't on Franks, it's really good. There's a lot of really, like, it's very similar to the other ones, but it's kind of like a no-b-s platform where you could kind of be you,

free speech reigns. You know, it's just, it's Franks. It's like a joke name that we would come up with on the show, but it really exists. Well, I got changed. It's now called V-O-C-L. Mike spent $1 million a month building an app that pretty much just exists to give Mike a place to talk because he's banned everywhere else because of spreading election lies. Yep. Keep spending. This is in addition to the Frank Speech Network, which is also known as Lindel TV. Yeah, FSN has been really helpful for me to kind of get through this time because this is kind of a lonely.

time like you kind of feel like you're on an island a lot of time and that's what franks all the franks platforms have just been great that's right gareth guess how much he spent well i'll just tell you now fighting election fraud 40 million wow what an idiot and that's outside of the lawsuits yeah well he's on the hood 1.3 billion well the lawsuits are starting to pile up it's not just that. To me, an executive and engineer sued him, as did another voting machine company, Smartmatic. So in 2024, Mike took VOCL public, and it immediately recorded a deficit of over $140 million. I don't play the market that much, but is that good? No, it's not that good, actually.

Buy the dip. Holy fuck. This is your hero. But they had a plan. They had a plan to make up for all the lost revenue. They hired Rudy Giuliani. Yeah. And again,

if when you're, when your Hail Mary is Rudy, you're in a good zone. In June of 2025, Michael's Delta major. It's such a clown car of fucking morons. It's fucking amazing. It's amazing this guy ever made money.

Like, this is just a guy who should be living. Yeah, you should just have shut up and be... And the trailer selling crack. But if he had just shut up, he would just be living in Pillow Paradise. Yes. If he'd shut the fuck up, he would be living great. But this era with, like, him and Rudy and what the hell was her name?

That woman who, they all just so cocky being like the election was stolen, all this shit. Kellyanne Conway? No. There's a lot of them. Yeah, I can't remember her name. But she gets sued, too. She was a big dominion like this. Oh, yeah, that woman.

Yeah. Yeah, she got hammered. Hammered. Yeah, she's fucked. So in June 2025, he was dealt a major blow. A jury found him guilty of defamation against former Dominion executive Eric Coomer, and he had to pay $2.3 million out of his personal funds. So that's not a good sign with the coming $1.3 billion lawsuit coming.

It's like a bellwether. Mike currently has a crowdfunding campaign to pay for lawyers and fees. to appeal the judgment, claiming he won't be able to afford it without the help of his followers. So far he has raised $37,000 of the needed $400,000. And we'll put the go-fummy in this episode description just because we really, let's help get Mike over there. I mean, you know, we've had some fun and we like to laugh,

but the guy needs our help and he is hard as in the right place. He's a friend of the show. Yeah, yeah. But look, if you can't afford to give also, the website has a handy function where it lets you send him a prayer so that's cool yeah um all in all since he began his uh crusade to prove the absolutely false notion of election fraud mike and my pillow have lost around 200 million in counting and this doesn't even count the hundreds of millions they're going to come from the dominion thing mike himself has claimed that he's in ruins living on a thousand dollars a week and he had

to borrow money to keep excuse me it's not that bad I can live on a thousand dollars a week. I've done a lot worse, Mike. Yeah. And he had to borrow money to keep operations afloat, which is something he's used to, if that's true. He should have called it a fluff. He is a walking example of self-destruction that a lot of addicts have in America.

Every time he gets back on his feet, he cuts his own legs out from under him. He was once an inspirational Christian success. story but his crazy behavior and ramblings has you know knocked that down it would be sad if he wasn't such a piece of shit but anyway um on october 22nd the pentagon announced this is what three days ago yeah on october 22nd the pentagon announced 60 new journalist outlets would be allowed into the building to cover the u.s franks nearly all legacy media had rejected their new press policies, so these 60 new will take place of the old media. The new ones include Gateway Pundit, podcaster Tim Poole, Frontlines by Turning Point USA, and Lindell TV created by Mike Lindell.

Oh my God. Mike, quote, Lindel TV is proud to be part of a new generation of news organizations, reshaping how real information reaches the public. Yeah, real information for sure. well uh not to pile on the good news but uh dominion dominion i believe was now is owned by a right wing lunatic so i think it is yeah so even when it comes to the but is it but is it completely owned by him or is it uh no is that dominion i thought they bought something else i don't think they bought dominion they bought everything i think you bought another company i think it's dominion bro either way This is what sucks about that last election.

I mean, it's like there's many things that suck, but it's that these people all get the U-turn. Like they get the- Oh, you're right. You're right. It was bought by it. This is October 9th. He purchased and re-banded Dominion voting system.

The new company is called Liberty Vote. Yeah, so now that's going to be the election counting. Like, we are. but why would any why would any so so i'm just i'm i'm a i'm a i'm a a liberal governor i'm a liberal state house i'm a liberal whatever i'm a liberal pull that quote why would you allow just immediately get rid of all dominion machines well let me ask you this dave do you think they're going to do that no yeah of course not they're not because they are they are they're their whole

model is to be the flat-footed oopsie how it happens yeah yeah but but regardless the the teeing up of this election

to not be real they've got it eight different ways I mean yeah if it's not the gerrymandering it's the

they'll force the recounts and they've put all these people in power and they might not even need to do that because the voting the voting machines are going to be, you know, they are now that, if this were to happen in 2026 or 2028 especially, they will validate any conspiracy theory that is needed if it even gets to that. Yeah.

Which is cool. True. Yeah, it is cool. Right after Steve Bannon says Trump is definitely going to be president in 2028. He did say that. I did sing in that video. Yeah. uh written by josh and drowsky uh source material a lot of it's from mike's own autobiography so that's why

it all sounds crazy and completely false um the book is called what are the odds from crack addict to ceo by mike lindell uh also the guardian business insider and ABC news well shout out to Mike lindell you really shout it to Mike lindell you are a real fucking idiot what a fucking idiot and shout out to Mike Lendell you are a big big stupid idiot but hey you figured out a stupid way to make a pillow that old boomers who are probably a little racist loved it just it just just so fucked up it just so fucked up america isn't how we've never solved any of our sort of issues that we've talked about for on this podcast you know over 300 years or whatever the fact that just the dumbest people doesn't feel like we've been doing it for that so much

fucking money but you know what I mean all the episodes we've talked about like this just these fucking idiots making money and it's like

yeah the system is just a disaster is there if you were a white crackhead with this level of a redemption story would no part of you

be putting any sort of philanthropy towards helping people deal with drug addiction instead he just becomes a fucking Trump moron and just loses

himself in that and then woes me's when his pillow company goes under because he believes that aliens act the election yeah i mean can i i i just like to say like i i have said like on twitter whatever in the past like this guy is clearly still just a fucking drug addict and people who are on the left have been like hey man he really pulled himself out of his boo blah blah blah blah motherfucker motherfucker read the book read anything this dude has never stopped doing drugs this dude has never every single thing about him says i am still high on fucking drugs as well as we really should not be we look these fascist psychos they don't concede many victories or give tiny compliments

or they don't give an inch. Why would you to this guy reward or celebrate him in any way? Just because he's a folksy dangerous does not mean he's not a dangerous. We really need to start getting our heads out of our fucking asses because this way that we've been playing it

for the past 40, 50 years is not working. That's what got us here. So continuing to just sort of be like, hey, come on, we aim high, you know? Let's get that doesn't work. It fully is time to just try to get John Stewart to run for president and hold on to your butt cheeks.

Because we have no hope other than attack these people as soon as humanly possible and do it by any means necessary when it comes to rhetorical abuse in their direction. All we really have as people with microphones is the ability to make fun of them. And that's why when we call Stephen Miller a ghoul or say that he's screech powers, you know, mixed with Nosferatu or whatever, like, these are, that is all we have. And so you should not be championing Mike Lindell's comeback story because he's, his comeback story is a story of a man who never came down. Seriously. So this is going up in a couple of days So that means That we still have a couple days

Left of Shows left So on The 28th We'll be in Middell's hometown Yeah, it'll be in Minneapolis On the 29th, we'll be in Kansas City And on the 30th we'll be in Denver I think Denver is sold out though

Denver is sold out But the rest of them Yeah The other two, you can get tickets, too. Yeah, you can get tickets. So get some tickets. Hey, dollop fans. I know you love the dollop.

You love listening to the dollop. Do you want to watch the dollop? You're like, Gareth, what are you talking about? By the way, it's not Gary, it's Gareth. Well, we have partnered with Lakeside Animation, and we are starting to animate some of our episodes. So if you want to go watch a five-partner animation, which is actually like a 22-minute episode or 30-minute episode,

I can't remember, of the Rube, you can go to Lakeside Animation, on YouTube and watch a really awesome animation of the Rube. It really genuinely kicks ass, and we're very proud of it. And the more you share it, the more you give it to people, the more you follow Lakeside, all that stuff, the better chance we have of making a lot more of them. We're already making a second one,

so go there and watch the Rube.