The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 741 - Alexander Hamilton - Part Two

Episode Date: July 7, 2026

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine Alexander Hamilton Part 2 of 4SOURCESTOUR DATESOFFICIAL MERCHHIMSRocketmoney CHEWY - Save $20SQUARESPACE - Use OFFER CODE: DOLLOP to save 10%See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, I'm Andrew Santino. And I'm Bobby Lee. And we made something completely insane. We took celebrities. We put them in my mom's basement. We throw trivia at them. We hit them with absurd challenges. And then, just when they think they know what's happening, we blow to a whole tinge pot.

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Rumor is that his penis is broke. And show up where the Taco Bar was. His brain just fucking exploded. River of cheese. You've been drinking any gnome juice? No, officer. My dad had a fart chair. Hey, cover me. They're listening to the dollup on the All Things

Comedy Network. This It's a sag after union podcast. Same right. It's an American history podcast. Each week, I read a story. He sat a little over the intro in this one. From American history to a really annoying guy. Gerith Reynolds, who has no idea what the topic is going to be.

You get worse. How about? And I brought a new character with me. Hello, I'm the haunting Dutchman. We will be doing things like this intermittently throughout the show. Well, or not. I mean, we can just end it right here like this could be the last one. You've left people on a cliffhanger of Hamilton?

I don't think so, buddy. Absolutely. We can keep our personal trash off air, but we're finishing this story. Hami. Hymoh. When we left Alexander Hamilton, he was being a huge piece of shit. That's correct. 1793.

Alexander Hamilton wrote a resolution to have representation in Congress. Congress reflect one's wealth. Quote, quality, sorry, quote, inequality is inherent. So we didn't even try. I guess I felt like it. Well, he never actually proposed it efficiently. Right, I know. But he didn't write it up.

Yeah, but it's, but it passed. No, we never tried for. No, that's not true. There were guys wanting equality. But, okay, so we are done with the monarchy. We're like, fuck that. We're done. And then we're here.

And then we're like, let's do like the 80% monarchy. Yeah, I mean, that's basically the point you take away from a people's history of the United States by Howard Zen. Because he basically makes the point of like, yes, these powerful rich men got rich men got rid of the crown because they wanted to be the new crown. And then what's amazing is, okay, so that exists. You would, this is what I always get so blown away by in American political culture. You would think that you would not bring that shit. You wouldn't like talk about those guys.

You'd be like they had slaves. They definitely wanted a soft monarchy. All that. And instead, you're like, these fucking geniuses. they figured out how But you can go in there Because there's so many different opinions And you can pick from Jefferson

And pick from Monroe And you can put together A portrait of actually good things they said Right Unfortunately Hamilton is the one who built that government Right He really did Everything he wanted he got

Right And he is a fucking abhorrent monster I hear Just again explain the musical He has a music. We don't do musicals for pieces of shit. No, no, we don't. He seemed to believe that inequality was inherent, and when soldiers trapped Congress...

That's so defeatist. What do you mean is de fetus? Well, the idea that we never are, we're like, we could all be equal. But he's not, he... Yeah, I know. He's not being defeatist. He's part of the upper crust, and that's all he wants to keep power and control. Right.

Yeah. So he's even worse than defeated. And he's rich. Yeah. He's defeater. I mean, he's tied to a rich family. He himself is not really wealthy, but he is married to him. This is the same thing that happened with Stephen Miller.

Just, you bullied him. He's great, though. You bullied him too much, and there's an evil volcano inside of this little shit, and you bullied it until magma rolled out. So the soldiers or mags are not getting pay. so the soldiers, not the officers now, the soldiers, trapped Congress in the State House and refused to let them out until they get paid. So they send Alexander out to talk to them,

and he assures them that if they let Congress leave, Congress would immediately discuss their demands. And so the soldiers agree. Alexander then asked Pennsylvania's leaders to send their militia in to attack the soldiers. They refuse. So a really upset Alexander tells Congress to escape to Princeton, which they do. Oh, my God.

And that felt like it couldn't get worse, and then there was the last sentence. Well, I guess we just have to escape to Princeton. Man, oh, man. He's so bad. On July 1783, annoyed that Congress didn't want a strong, central government, he resigned and went back to practicing law. Okay. He moved his family onto Wall Street.

Got a nice house there. His legal practice thrived. He's a little on the nose, isn't it? Yeah. His legal practice thrived. He needed, so people need lawyers because loyalist lawyers have all been run off after the war. Right. So there's like a lawyer shortage.

And Alexander is, I know. Awesome. Alexander's also very good. What do you call that? Utopia? Alexander is also very, oh, I should also thank someone. You always like to thank Shaquille. So, you know, we got sued for $2 million, right, for the tiny, tiny,

the accident that only damaged the frame of the license plan. So our attorney, the attorney, our insurance. company hired turns out to be a huge doll fan. Oh. The attorney that the, that is fucking incredible. The attorney that the, the counter attorney. The insurance hired for us. Yeah.

Oh, for you. For us. Oh, okay. Great. That would have been amazing too. No, the other guy changed, the other attorney has changed his name four times and it's just like the most ambulance chasing piece of shit on the face of the year. One's a fan of the dollop. The other's the subject of a dollop.

Yeah. So, uh, so the, So our attorney, Lauren, she got her dad into the dollop. Okay. Mark Swanson. So I want to say,

hi, Mark. Mark Swanson. She has tried to get him into other podcasts, but Mark just says, nope, I got my podcast. That's my fucking guy right there. Mark, you're a real one. You understand? We love you, baby.

So funny. Okay, so he's going to be a lawyer, he's going to make money, because there's few lawyers. And he's good. He's very creative and theatrical with juries. He enjoys trading barbs with the opposing counsel and witnesses with the real animosity,

so much so that it shocks the court and his friends. Like everyone's like, whoa, bro, hey. Let's calm it down a little bit. Quiet, motherfucker. This guy sucks, am I right? I'm enjoying our barbs. But his fees were affordable, and he did not like jokes about attorneys overcharging. Like, you just fucking made.

Tell you what, man. Try to get a restraining order and then have them charge you for an email when you're in your darkest place. After they told you, like, we're good people. Another hot shot lawyer was Aaron Burr. Hell yeah. He often mingled. They often mingled together, like they're traveling the same circles. Burr lives down the street.

They are at dinners together. Burr's wife would go visit Eliza and as lawyers, their styles are completely different. Burr is succinct and cordial. A friend quote, Burr would say as much in a half hour as Hamilton in two hours. Burr was terse and convincing

while Hamilton was flowing and rapturous. No. He's annoying. Yeah, it's annoying. He's annoying. It's annoying. It's not flowing and rapturous. You know what we really should do?

we should make the Hamilton musical, the real Hamilton, and we should make the real Hamilton musical. And just be like real about it. This is what it is. This is the guy. Annoying Hamilton. Long-winded loser. Alexander spoke for hours.

And Burr's arguments were on one sheet of paper. That's the guy. That's the guy. A set list versus Corey Booker. Right? Yes. Alexander was easily goaded into reactions. by insults while Burr stayed composed.

But they both gained reputations. I really do want to just picture Aaron Burr's voice like Bill Burr's for the rest of the episode, if that's okay. Yeah, that's fine. Where the fuck were you? They both got reputations as the best young lawyers in America. You're starting to become a little contradictory. They were on the same aside at times, which would cause friction.

Once Burr was offended, so they'd be brought on to the same case. Right. So once Burr was offended that Alexander just assumed that Alexander would be giving the closing summation. Right. And then I'll obviously headline the event. So Burr anticipated everything he would say in closing and set it in the opening statement. He does his set list. And so when it came, Alexander's time to speak, he was uncharacteristically silent. I also was going to do the airplane stuff, but I'll just move down. obviously Aaron did a lot of wife stuff huh

Equals I did that too All right fuck Okay well I think we're pretty good here You know I think is the most fucked thing in comedy When there's an opener and you're a headliner And the opener does a joke similar to yours

And you tell them not to do that joke for the rest of the week Yeah motherfucking headliner you have shit loads of material Opener does not You're a dick Also you're supposed to go through the you're supposed to beat that you're supposed to beat it

you're supposed to beat that you're supposed to win so if someone does something that's tough shit that's like people will say don't do crowd work because I do crowd work and I've sat there before watching someone be like here we go this guy's doing pretty good

so later Alexander said bird's success was due to his charisma quote when I analyzed his arguments, I could never discern in what his greatness consisted. So he's a little bit, bitch. Alexander was style, you know what Alexander is? He's not a fucking man.

He's just not like a man. He's a little whiny. He doesn't have bro code. It's not even brocode. He's just not, as a masculine dude, he is the bad version. Right. He's not someone. Toxic.

Yeah, he doesn't stand up for the right things. He doesn't, like, instead of going like, yeah, and that guy's pretty fucking good. Yeah. He goes like, he's not, he's not good. He's a little catty. Hater.

Yeah, he's a hater. Alexander was stylish and had a daily barber appointment to have his reddish hair braided brushed and powdered. Boy, boy. Well, okay, I'm going to be honest. Part of me mad. Part of me intrigued,

thinking about it. A barber every day? That guy's like, that's awesome. Yep. Why do we do Pippi today? Pippi long stocking. Every fucking day. And imagine that, imagine that this is a time

when barbers braided and powdered your hair. Powdered. Now they're just like, get out of here. Powdered. Oh, my God. That's pretty awesome. Just him walking in like James Franco on spring break.

How are you? So, I think I've got a motive. He's raking in money because he's representing rich loyalists who are being sued by patriots. Oh, wow. According to a paper, quote, A great majority of loyalists owe the restoration of their property solely to the exertion of this able order.

Many lawyers refused to... Do you remember what Bush was president? He kept talking about these frivolous medical lawsuits. That was like a huge thing. Yeah. It's like that where you're like, wait, what? It's like these loyalists have been through enough. Well, having just been on the other side of one.

Of an insurance. Well, yeah. The license plate was, the license plate frame was damaged, and she said that her hips were destroyed for life. But yeah. Literally physically not possible. Right. Yeah. But it's all, yeah.

I mean, it's hard to make a hero out of the healthcare industry. But yeah. It's not even the healthcare. No, I know for you. It's the attorneys. Yeah, right, right. Yeah. So anyway, many lawyers refused to take on the loyalists as clients.

And so... Because of dislikability? Yeah, for some reason. Yeah. So the public turns on Hamilton. As they saw, they watched British atrocities during the war, specifically the deaths of 11,000 on prison ships that were anchored in the harbor and the bones were still washing up on shore. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It's a lot of people that just die on a ship.

Now you go to go on a carnival for that. Alexander Hamilton. Alexander Hamilton. Do they have that scene in the music where they pick up bones? Yeah. I'm feeling alone on the beach with the soldier bones. Alexander Hamahan. So Eliza has a daughter named Angelica.

Oh, great. Everyone's going to want a fucker. What did I tell your womb? Crank out boys. God damn it, this one's hot. There we are. She's a baby. I know, but you can see.

You can see. You can tell. Trust me. She can be hot as shit. She'd have eight kids. Now you get ugly. You hear me? She'd have eight living kids over 20 years.

Wow. Someone don't make it. Alexander was a loving father who doted on the kids. He made time for his kids whenever he could. He became one of the first members of the New York Menomission Society, which worked toward abolitionment. of slavery in New York and ending the kidnapping of free black people and selling them. So a good thing. Yes.

Now, like a lot of people in society, did own slaves. You there. Write up that thing about how ownership of people's wrong. Not for me. Yeah. Not for me. More sugar. I can't do the yard work.

Oh. He has long been called a staunch abolitionist in biographies. But Alexander's grandson wrote in a biography that family accounts showed conclusively that he bought slaves for himself and others. Like we said, the first part. I mean, the four others is super fucking weird. Happy birthday! They're running a two-fer. I bought you a human.

That is so fucking crazy. In 2020, more evidence was found by a researcher that he bought. and sold slaves. Now, I'm trying to think of a song and the musical about that. It's not coming to, I can't remember it. Well, I mean, that is, it's such a great example of identity politics being used for evil because they essentially, by doing that cast, they whitewash what he is, which is a slave owner. Well, I mean, even, yes, and then also it's like, it's a fucking musical.

It's just like, a musical. And also, you have a guy you can make a guy. a musical about that likes all the stuff you like. It's called Aaron fucking Byr. That's the, that is really the thing. Instead of the guy that's the opposite. Now, how, I mean, obviously, we have no insight into this. Do you have any idea as to far, like, how, did he just read the wrong book?

Who? Oh, he read Chernos book, which is. Yeah, yeah, but did he just pick up the wrong book? And he's like, oh, shit. Well, Chernos book was a best seller. Or did his, like, a liberal pipeline get him to the point where he's like, I trust this guy? The liberals love the Chernobyl book. And the Chernow book misrepresents.

And turnout started out as a financial guy. So he loves Hamilton. He's a financial guy. He worked in finance. And finance guys jerk off over Hamilton. So you took the word of a money guy. By the way, and made a lot of money. A lot of money.

Okay, so in 2020, more evidence was found by a researcher that he bought and sold slaves. the researcher Jesse Sir Philippi, quote, not only did Alexander Hamilton enslave people, but his involvement in the institution of slavery was essential to his identity, both personally and professionally. The denial and obscuration of these facts in nearly every major biography written about him

over the past two centuries has erased the people he enslaved from history. Oh, wow. which is then what the musical does. The best known Hamilton biography by Ron Chernow called him a quote, uncompromising abolitionist. For others. And insinuates that he had a stronger stance against slavery than John Adams, who famously never owned a slave and said he would never rent slave labor.

when two petitions came before Congress in the very early days, and I want to say one was done by Aaron Burr, but I might be wrong, to abolish slavery and the slave trade, Alexander voiced no support for either. Chernow conceded he may have owned, quote, one or two slaves, or as he calls it, an uncompromising abolitionist. those thoughts are in the same book. Yes. Uncompromising abolitionists and owned a couple slaves. I don't know. I think he may, because his book came out after 20, his book came out before 2020, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, definitely did because of Hamilton.

So when this guy found the research actual proof, then he's like, we may have owned one or two slaves. I own two slaves. That doesn't mean I don't want. Everybody owns a couple of them. Man Churnout does not buy the researchers statement Well, it would be a big

It would be a big admission Yeah All right, fine And then Lynn Manuel Miranda has to go back To the musical Be like, all right We're gonna do it's like We're gonna do one

Duet between the slaves And then we're out There's gonna be one where we buy a slave There's just gonna be the slave thing A buying slave number Yeah, a buying slave one Oh, I know we'll do We'll have the slave

And the Caspi White I'm going to stand up real quick I don't know what we're doing anymore and I don't know why That would be fucking incredible That would be amazing White slave So he doesn't buy what the research

My people have been through enough He doesn't buy what the researchers said Even though Chernow says It quote broadens our sense of Hamilton's involvement Of slavery in a number of ways Am I the only one who sees this is a good thing? He says Sir Felipe didn't discuss

Alexander's involvement in abolitionist societies, end quote, amidst all information that would contradict her conclusions. Chernow wrote in passing that he did purchase slaves at an auction, but downplays it, saying they were probably just for a sister-in-law.

I mean, that's probably just gifts. It's just an impulse buy, like a magazine or some more orbits. He didn't want it, he gave them way. Oh, for God's sake, not for himself. Sometimes you buy people. It's a gift.

Listen, listen. Listen to me. A gift for someone else is not you co-signing the movement. All right? I, for one, have bought a tremendous amount of marijuana for a friend, and yet I abstain. Although I do smoke from time to time, as do my slaves. Sir Philippi found an entry in Alexander's... Slaves are great.

They make... my life so much easier. In his own cash book, in his own handwriting of a payment to his father-in-law for, quote, two Negro servants purchased by him for me.

After his death. That is the most incriminating receipt. I mean, you talk about having receipts. You have a literal receipt. For two slaves from my daddy in the payment of this signed Alexander Hamilton for sure me

Alexander oh sorry when he died servants and their values were listed as assets so he didn't even learn his lesson in his life yeah but it's bullshit and the fact that Chernout did this is fucking

it's scumbaggery because the last thing we should be doing a myth with is fucking slave owners. Well, how about this? Included in the conversation and then allow people to still decide if they love this. We all know that the founding fathers were mostly either slave owners or pro-slavery. And so you just factor that into your little fucking book. I'm sorry you need to jerk the guy off.

One of the weird things, and the historian said this one, I totally agree with. Everyone has a favorite founding father, and then they lie about them to try to make a point that they were the best. And so that's what he's doing here. But John Adams is no slaves. But John Adams is a huge piece of shit. Right. No slaves, but very like Trumpian, tyrant kind of stuff. Sure.

Ben Franklin. I don't know if he had slaves. He did. Yeah, he probably did. They all did. I mean, except Burr, I don't think Burr did. But some, some didn't. Yeah, I'm not going to fucking do that.

Jefferson didn't just have him. He fucked them. A lot of them were doing that. Alexander lobbied. I think I might be wrong. Sorry, I said fuck. I meant rape. Jesus.

Let's put him on money. How does that sound to everyone? Let's just put them on money. What do we think, huh? So Alexander lobbies for the establishment of the Bank of New York, which came to be in 1784. He was the bank's lawyer. He's on the board of directors. He wrote the charter.

But he was troubled as Governor George Clinton, New York Governor George Clinton. Oh, he funk. Yeah. We're finally getting some funk in this bitch. All right. Rose to power not through a... And Senator Bootsie Collins, baby. Boom.

Clinton rose to power not through a prominent family. wealthy connections, but by whipping up what he called hysteria in the commoners, uniting them against loyalists. And Clinton is not into Alexander's beloved banking system. God damn. We've talked about him on the podcast before. Yeah, he's come up a few times. So even though Alexander came from the child that he did, he does not want to see ordinary

people challenging the elite. Right. So the whole closer are behind you. Yeah, yeah, it is. Once you get on the other fucking side. Yeah. This is who we are. Yeah, this is, yeah, yeah.

It's the Kier-Starmer. My father was a toolmaker. My father was a toolmaker. His father-in-law ran against Clinton for governor but lost. Okay. So he's really mad the Clinton one. Sure. And he complained that Clinton's, quote, family and connections do not entitle him to be so distinguished as predominance.

It's, I mean, lowborn, lowborn. It's endlessly, this is the endless thing is to find ways to just, I mean, look, you're not going to, someone's not, you're just going to be able to pull these threads. You have to fight through for ideology and just be like, it's, it's kings and queen shit. We won the revolution, but there's still in the hearts of many a desire for a royal court and all that shit. and they're recreating it wherever they can. The elite after the revolution did not want to... By the way, remember Chuck Schumer? He used to do stuff publicly, didn't he?

That was funny. The resistance? The elite after the revolution did not want to give the propertyless hordes any real power. Alexander also hated a guy named Abraham Yates who thought the wealthy landowners should pay more taxes. Alexander complained of his, quote, ignorance and perversely. That's perverse. It's what's going on today with this is Newsome.

Endless. Right now. Alexander feared democracy, writing in 1785 that democratic tendencies would empower men who are not sufficiently disinterested in politics as men of wealthy families are. That is the... They will be too...

You've got to write 30 pages to come up with that bullshit. They will be too into politics, meaning wanting. Yes. Right. They will have, right. He believed that since the rich were already comfortable in life, they wouldn't fall prey to selfish influences. This is the, dude, it's truly the like, he made a lot of money. He's a good businessman.

Let's get him in there to fix everything. Yeah, yeah, that's how that works. That guy got there because he was using fair practices. Unlike the common man who just wanted to use politics to better his own station. I honestly, I think. part of it is we're just so tired that we're just like, whatever, do it, whatever, you know what I mean? We're just

like done. It's like, we don't buy it, but just go quick. You know, just fine, do it, hurry. Seeing men like Clinton and Yates find success in politics cemented his need to consolidate power in a strong federal government. The first Constitution promoted strong states and a weak

central government that wouldn't tax or overall states, and he thought that would lead to absolute disaster. So Alexander runs for a seat in New York's Assembly in 1786 and wins. He was then sent as a delegate to the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia in 1787. That's surely why he ran. Oh, just to go to the event. To go to the Constitution.

He must write the Constitution. Right. The convention was very secret. They agreed not to, this is a great, so our heralded Constitution. Written in secret. They agreed not to publish anything that said publicly. right, no publishing, there's no journalists allowed, and there's guards at the doors. Because you know the first draft where they were like, they'll kill us.

Well, this is crazy. I mean, I got to. Well, look, I think we call it a king. Idea. Yes. Invisible ink. That's pretty good. Oh, man, the shit they must have been saying.

Dude, they met on the second floor so people wouldn't hear them through the windows. Man, oh man. They had to be saying some fucking. All right. Look, we got it out. We got the vomit draft. Now let's think about what we can survive. So Alexander is very anxious.

Most of the men would not jeopardize the interests of their home states for a strong federal government. And he worried this is the only chance he would ever have to make it happen. After three weeks of silence, he finally speaks for five or six hours. Oh, fuck me. You just hear the gunshots of people taking themselves out. strong national government that's what they did on the second floor hey strong national government

etc blah blah blah modeled after Britain's quote the best model the world is ever produced hey bro do in part to its resistance to change hey dude sorry I'm pretty sure the whole thing we just went through

was to it's now completely resistant to change That's what he wanted. Society was already divided into the few and the many, and the few were already happy with their lot, but the many were unhappy, and so they would constantly work for change.

So this is his speech. This is the bad part. So America needs a constitution allowing the rich to be principal actors in the government, which would, quote, check the imprudence of democracy. My fucking, of democracy. I'll never forget.

We need to be careful. Otherwise, they might try to do democracy. I will never forget. I will never fucking forget doing the Burr episodes and calling him fascistic. And how many fucking people cried and screamed at me. This is extremely fascistic. Everything that he is, in his core, is extremely fascistic. We have such a fear.

Like, you hear this now where people, like, almost like how you just repeat a subliminal message of, but capitalism is the best system ever. It's a terrible system. It's like hilariously bad. Yeah. It's just so fucking dumb. Yeah.

And it's, it is when you listen to the people who are talking about it. Yeah. It's these people who are just going, there's nothing else you can do. Yeah, this is the best way you can do it. And that makes sense to me.

It's the struggling people who are like, well, what are you going to do? communism yeah right yes anyway i'm gonna eat my thumbs if you're poor you don't want to have communism you're out of your fucking tree i mean you just it really shows that you've you've been had yeah well because you're fighting for a system that keeps you oppressed yeah and and and and heralding these people who have their boots on your throat yeah it's really crazy uh so anyway he wanted to split congress a lower house elected for three year terms and an upper house whose members would serve for life

chosen by members So kingy Even now when you're here at Pitchback The king is shit We're not there yet Hold on And they'd be chosen by members

of the electoral college Who were elected by the public And quote An elective monarch With a lifetime appointment Who would be above temptation He wanted a king Who would be above temptation

Is the funny part What? Yeah that's the whole king problem Wait, what? So we're going to do a king who's really good at this. But we pick him. But we pick him and he's there for life and he's not going to be a fucking piece of shit. You understand?

That's the difference. Our king's not going to suck. King Chill will call him and he'll sit upon a throne of truth. Jesus Christ. The monarch would have total control, elective monarch would have total control of military, a veto and authority over international financial matters. So in other words, just a king. just go back to the monarchy.

Power and control of the lifetime senators and the president, basically. So essentially, it almost is talking about a more powerful king in a way, but he wants one with a government that he can overrule. Pretty much. He wants a king that can overrule the people, yeah, and a Senate. So all lifetime members, so they can overrule. and basically control everything. Right.

But he got that because I would argue that the Scotus are kings in a way. I mean, you can even looking now, I mean, you can, you know, look. They're making the craziest laws that kids are made. Yeah, it does. If you have the power to go change the checks and balances, well, then what's the point of the checks and balances? Like Woody Allen's bananas when he goes down there and he's like, everyone, everyone, everyone knows everything about him. Yeah, everyone knows what pants from the inside out or whatever. I mean, it makes a law.

Like, that's exactly what our SCOTUS is right now. Just doing the crazy shit. Everyone's like, well, I mean, eight guys or nine guys said it. So it's got to be a thing we all do. Look, they got there. Them's the rules. And then you go, and then you're like, oh, we're going to go outside his house of protest.

And they're like, what the actual fuck are you pieces of shit doing? You hold the fuck on. You have some fucking respect for Brett Kavanaugh's property. Okay. So the elected monarch and other officials. would come from elite stock and meddlesome, quote, trifling characters would be easily overstepped.

Who's judging the meddling characters? Oh, the elite king. Historian John Furling, quote, Hamilton's way of thinking was not one of compassion. It was an expression of the elite's overarching desire to preserve their exalted status and its class-based anti-democratic spirit not only would characterize Hamilton's thought for the remainder of his life,

but it would also remain the driving force behind much of conservative philosophy for generations to come. Well, I mean, there you go. I don't think we need to do the rest of the episode because that is as, I mean, that completely undercuts everything. And, you know, why does it take? we just believe everything like I look I'm gonna I told you I watched Hamilton the musical I was like that's pretty good why why are why is there never the truth pipeline why is it not as strong that's why we got to make the Hamilton for real musical well that that's always the problem right is whenever something becomes

popular like well this is bullshit yeah I mean that's that's what you're just like wait what and the fact that Democrats the ones who embraced it you're just like it's a fucking conservative douche and also know um the But it was a musical. Yeah. I mean, it's like literally, however, like, this is what buttresses the argument the right has against the liberals. Stuff like this. Yeah.

It's like, they made a musical about a fascist and you're humming the songs. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Hey, everybody. It's Gareth and Dave from the Dove. Listen, my movie, Give It Up is going to be doing a screening in Los Angeles, July 28th. in North Hollywood. You can go to

Give It Up Film.com, or you can just go to my website, Gareth Reynolds.com, but I'd love to see you there. That's July 28th. I think it's the Lemley in North Hollywood. You can only get it Tuesday, huh?

That's a big theater, jerk. Gareth, the dog was brought to you by Chewy. Look, if you're a dog dad, like I am, I have 42 dogs. You know about Chewy. When they say that Chewy has everything that you need to keep you. your dog, your cat, or your lizard

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that's Squarespace.com slash dollop for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, you use offer code dollop to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. So that's his plan. The convention likes some of it, but overall they thought it was too much. Quote, Hamilton has been praised by everybody but supported by none. Some thought his long speech was embarrassing arrogance. He was quiet for the rest of the convention before he went home.

One attendant, quote, Colonel Hamilton seems to have quitted the convention in despair. Whatever. The other New York delegates... Enjoy a convention. The other New York delegates never voted with him. And the attendees said that caused Hamilton to be, quote, so much mortified that he went home. Now, my guess...

This is what I was talking about when he's not a man thing. My guess is that they're not doing that because it's so obviously too much. Yeah, it's too much. So they're like, yeah, you're right, but bro, we can't go on the record with this. Yeah. So in a group of what I would say are probably... conservative leading guys, he's like way out on the right. Right.

Yeah. After much compromise, a constitution was drafted and signed by 36 delegates from 12 states, and he's the only signer from New York, but the states now have to ratify it. People in urban areas favored ratification and rural areas did not. Supporters, including Alexander, were called Federalists, and opposition were called anti-federalists. And Federalists have the upper hand, because, George Washington already signed it.

The press overwhelmingly backed it, and federalists are united in the way the anti-federalists, of course, are not. Right, yeah. The anti-federalists, yeah. Well, yeah, because they have the machine. They're in the driver's seat. Yeah, the money and the banks. The fight of ratification was at fever pitch in New York.

Governor Clinton was strongly anti-federalist, and he made wild speculations about what would be in the Constitution. A very angry Alexander wrote an essay criticizing him, and then Clinton supporters attacked Alexander. One of those was a fictional story about Tom Schitt, an illegitimate son from the Caribbean who thought farm overseers should be appointed for life. I love how long swears have been around. That's so great.

Tom shit. They called him conceded and wrote that George Washington really didn't like him. And Alexander confessed this. quote hurts my feelings. They got you. Tom shit. So to get this past, to get it ratified, he writes essays in a question called the Federalist Papers.

Working with James Madison and John Jay to anonymously publish 85 essays from October 1787 through May 1788 under the pseudonym Publius. Alexander wrote 51 of the 85. Of course. He focused on the executive and judicial branches, taxes, and the need for a standing army. Man, did he love a standing army idea? He said it would not lead to the government being run by the wealthy and well-born.

No social class would yield control. He literally, that's what his whole fucking speech was. But now he's like, well, this isn't what I wanted. So it's not going to be that. Then why are you for it? Yeah. No social class would yield total control. and he backed off the elected monarch thing and now wanted a four-year term because that's what

everyone else wanted. Yeah. Yeah. But we know. Yeah, we know what he wanted. He wrote against including, he wrote against including the Bill of Rights. Saying a little much, isn't it? Come on.

Saying there was no need for freedom of the press. They don't need that. Since there were no laws saying anything to the contrary. Since there were no. So. You don't need to say The press needs freedom Because hey, can we get ahead of some stuff?

No! Wait until it happened, you idiot. What are you talking about? That's libertarianism in the nutshell. Yeah, right. Yeah, enough. Yeah. You don't need government protections.

And I always go back to the fact that the Democrats have never villainized the Federalist Society, which is the driving society behind all of our destruction. you know, through the judges, especially SCOTUS. But, you know, that's who these, that's what they are. They're these guys. They, this is their belief. You know what the Democrats are, if you ever watch football and you get to a two-minute

drill and you have a defensive coordinator who decides to just do regular coverage and you're just watching the offense carve you up slowly instead of being able to bomb it down the field. Right. And it's just kind of the slower painful death where you know it's going to end in the last second field goal. Yeah. But you just have to experience it. even though you know the outcome. Yeah.

But the whole time you're sitting there and you're like, one turnover, one turnover, one turnover, one turnover, and it's never coming. Never happens. So New York's ratification convention. He made very long speeches and he highly debated anyone to disagree with them. A lot of people probably quit on him from fatigue. They were like, fine, fucking let's do it king.

He absolutely sounds like one of those guys that he just stopped arguing with because he just won't stop. Yeah. My loud opinion overcomes your reason thought, you know. But it doesn't matter because once Virginia ratified, then New York immediately did. And after he writes Washington. Now, they had avoided each other after the war. He did not visit Washington when he was in Philadelphia.

He did not go to a party that Washington threw, even they just lived blocks away. But he thinks Washington should be... To be fair, he might have been high. He might have been high. But he thinks Washington should be the first leader of the country. and because if Washington is the first leader who's going to get a cabinet job. Right. Right.

Yeah. He really is meant for politics. Yeah. I mean, his ideology is perfect. I'm a member of the Me Party. So he goes to Washington, and Washington says the idea makes him feel, quote, a kind of gloom. Wait. Sorry, what's going on?

The idea you just told me about being the first. leader. It makes me feel like black and dead inside. Like a, yeah, but you can, I feel like I'm, um, we need just filled with cobwebs and, uh, of dread spiders. Does that make sense? Please. Okay. Awesome. So Washington just wants to go to Mount Vernon and retire and kick it. See, that's, uh, because he's like the richest guy in the country. Him and Morris. Um, Alexander, he knows the buttons to push on Washington. And so he says, look. They're probably going to invent teeth soon.

He says, if the U.S. fails, people will blame you for not serving and ruin your reputation. So Washington agrees to do it. Okay. He's such a fucking manipulator. All right. All right. All right. I'll spider web it.

All doom and gloom it. Fine. So obviously he gets elected. Super easy. There's one small hiccup. Congress votes for president by casting two votes, one for president, one for vice president. So technically, if the opposing party or whatever is playing shenanigans, the VP could get more votes than the president and become the president. Okay.

So. Oh, right, right, right. And Washington Adams are running for president and vice president. So Alexander is freaking out about this And he runs around making all the electors promise To withhold their vote from Adams To make sure the other party doesn't get But Washington just wins easily

Because it's fucking Washington So his whole panic thing was pointless But it led to Adams getting this horrifyingly Low number of votes Which totally humiliates him And then later on he finds out what Alexander had done and he was fucking pissed and they were done. Like, he hated

him forever. So Angelica comes to visit. That is his wife's sister. They got a thing. They got a thing. She likes him. He clearly is like, I should have met her first. What was that, honey? Nothing. I just was talking about maybe banging your sister.

You sent something into your mug. I just said, I wish I you know. What? Say it. Your sister's like she's hot. Oh, she's great. Yeah, I love her. I love her.

I love her. You know, I was thinking the other day, if things had played out differently, you could have ended up with her. That's what I was thinking. I think that a lot. I think that all the time, I keep thinking it's a thing that I wake up and I think it. And I go to bed and I think it. But you've ended up with me. But you've ended up with me.

But you've ended up with me who dresses like Whistler's mother. Yes. Look at your little black eyes. Yes. I know. I'm like a character in bird box. It's very, it's very like a... And you know what's crazy.

I married Corline. Yeah. She was going to be there in my stead. And she wasn't. And instead you found me. Oh my God. And we were engaged immediately. I, when I bang you...

And now you've put 13 babies in me. Eight have made it. When I bang you, I close my eyes and think of her every fucking time. Every time. Can you, can I call you Angelica? I call me whatever you want me, tough guy. It doesn't change it. She's coming to visit.

Will you leave? She is coming to visit, and I'll be right here, because I think you want to do something with her. Okay. And you're not going to. You're mine, all mine, my little baby, Hamilton. Fuck me. I'm thinking of getting rid of my vagina.

She doesn't strike you. Angelica lived in England now and missed Alexander deeply. She told Eliza that she told Eliza that. she was jealous that she spoke to Alexander every day. You know, it's funny, because we were just having a conversation the other day about how you and him almost ended up together. And instead it's me. Did you imagine saying that to your sister?

I just, um, I wish she was mine. Are you good otherwise? She also asked her sister for forgiveness if her letters to him sometimes would be, quote, a little saucy. I'll be honest. I did a handful of pubs and I asked them. And I feel bad about it. So this visit led to more gossip. Did I tell you that the last one I scooted along like a dog with a buttich? No. Yeah. I did the thing where I put my hands down and put the letter there and then I sort of just kind of moved myself over. So I'm going to go to bed. Thank you. Can I? You'll tell you my lesson? No. Let me tell you my lesson. I should have signed it afterwards.

because I got ink all over my area. All right, thank you. Good night. Good night, babe. So this visit leads to more gossip about their relationship because people had overheard a joke by one of their other sisters, Peggy, insinuating that Alexander would love to be inside Angelica's bedchamber. Wow.

A funny joke. What's the punchline? It's been really stressful for the family. To find bedchamber. Yeah. When she left, Alexander wrote of watching her ship sail off, quote, Imagine what we felt, we gazed, we sighed, we we we we wept. What did you say, hon?

Nothing. What are you saying? To myself about the boat. What about what boat? Any boat? Just that one out there that she's on. Oh, oh yeah, of course. The one that Angelica's on?

Just imagining. She's on that one and you know what's crazy? We're not going to see her for so long. I mean, it takes so long for that. boat to get there. And then she's going to have such a long adjustment period and she's so busy. Part of me wonders if we'll ever see her again. I took a pair of her panties. Oh, you do whatever you need as long as you're getting your bread buttered here.

Used. Yeah, okay, whatever. That's fine. I'll wash them later. Don't worry. You know what I was thinking? No. Maybe tonight. No. We blow the candles out and lay in bed and I fart like I'm your mama. Jesus Christ.

What do you think of that? I know. I didn't that bad. Yeah, I know. What the fuck's wrong with you? I don't know. I'm just trying to keep it spicy. It's not spicy. What's your fetish?

Sisters. That's not going to work for me. Come to bed. I'll dutch oven. So, Washington takes office on April 30th, 17, and you know, the most size during an inauguration since Trump. Fuck. Fuck. So he chooses.

Adams and Alexander to help guide him through the process. Adam said presidential conduct should allow for character differences, as it's inevitable that it would very due to personality. So like everyone's going to be different. So just do your thing. Okay. Alexander is like, no, act like British royalty. So Washington did.

Sorry. So the one, Adams is like, Adams? No. Adams is like, all right, yeah, just try to flip yourself. Be yourself and we'll kind of sculpt it around you, but kind of stick to some of the rules a little bit. And Hamilton's like, you're supposed to be a king. Basically.

Do it right. And so Washington listens to Alexander. He has formal weekly receptions and bowed rather than shaking hands. He rode in fancy carriages with bewigged servants. Rich conservatives love it, but the everyday Americans are like, wait, what? Yeah. What are you doing? Yeah.

It's like the Met Gala. Yeah. Alexander works behind the scenes to get his two So there are going to be two centers from New York So he's working behind the scenes to get the ones he wants First choice Schumer First choice Schumer First choice father-in-law Philip

Schuller So there's three very power The powerful New York families The Schuller's the Clintons and the Livingston's And Philip offered to support the Livingston's candidate If they supported him Okay So we'll put out the Clinton.

But Alexander wants his buddy Rufus King. We'll get a king somehow. I'm hell-bent on a king. And he convinces Philip to go back on his word to the Livingstance and support King. And then King wins. And so from then on, the Livingston's and the Clintons joined together and formed an alliance and they would forever make everything difficult for Alexander in New York. So, which was just such a fucking dumb.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just crazy. Again, the fact that it's never made sense. And he just always wants his fucking weight. He doesn't care how he gets it. Washington nominated.

Yeah. Washington nominated 34-year-old Alexander to lead treasury. So he joins a small cabinet made up of the Secretary of War, Henry Knox. I think it's the big guy you dope behind I think it's a big boy Oh great Hey Hello bunker

I was in front of you Hey I'll tell you what You stay right there You're a wall to me I'm kidding It's really good to see you You're getting fatter

What are you doing? You're getting a lot fatter And I think that's great for protection I'm doing a pie diet A piet? A piet yeah You're on a piet? Yes

Who's recommending that Oh my mom Hello. Also, the Secretary of State, Thomas Jefferson. So... I'm a fucking nightmare. Adams is rarely invited to contribute in the meetings. Alexander got a $3,500 per year salary,

so it's less than he would make as a lawyer, but it's pretty good money. And he, as soon as he gets put on, made Treasury Secretary, He goes on a fucking hiring spree. Because I guess they didn't say what your department should be. So he just starts hiring people left to right. He hires 39 people.

Right. Well, they wouldn't know. I mean, they're just like, all right, you know, you're the treasury. He's like, great. I'll need a staff and some corridors and a carriage. Basically. And the next biggest is the statement department, which is five people. I did 39.

Would you do? Five? Oh. I don't need, why would you need 39? What's the average? Is anyone else in the 30s? Four? Four is the average?

Yeah. I thought I limited myself. No, he didn't. I wanted to do over 50. No, it's crazy. Huh. Yeah. Alexander Hamata.

Oh, no, what are you doing? This little thing I've been tinkering with. It's just kind of a, I don't know. You ever sing your name? No. His name is Alexander Hamleton. Generally insane. I'm in the room where I have.

Okay, so he has to come up this report really quick in like 100 days on America's credit for the House of Representatives. So he spends days and nights in his office and he cranks out a 40,000 word report. Oh, this motherfucker. This absolute motherfucker. It shows America's debt at 52 million and the state's combined debts at 25 million. Sounds so cute. So cute.

Now some representatives called it and also Alexander absolutely genius. others at strenuous objections. Some were confused in the silence by the insanely long, detailed, and complex report. They're like, I don't want to fucking read this. Come on. I have a family. It really is the more text. Oh, I would be so mad if I got that.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. You know what? I'm going to go fold this up and beat the shit out of it with it. How's that sound? So entity calls on the government to repay the national debt and assume the state's debts which would create a new national debt. This was called Assumption.

And he saw the new debt as a lifeline for America. So he sees assumption as well as a well from which the government can draw as America expanded. So it's a fucking line of credit sort of thing. He calls it a national blessing. I mean, we are really, we are true to our roots. That is That's just phenomenal He wants the government

To finance it through Taxation and issuing bonds to the rich Literally Reagan Those two work together great The bonds We call it Ye trickle economics

The bonds would increase Government debt While tying the wealthy To the government which would create a powerful force that would work to grow federal power and increase taxation to help pay down the interest. I cannot fucking believe. We didn't have a shot.

I just thought we like veered off the plan. We had no shot. There was never a shot. We did. If he didn't talk Washington in running for president, this wouldn't have happened. Who would we have had? I don't know. Maybe Adams.

Historian William Huggland, quote, wealth would be concentrated in the hands of moneyed investors. Their ambitions would fund the nation's ambitions. So to get the rich to buy bonds, the interest would be paid by the people by taxing domestic products as well as imports. So you're just taking the money from the port. So southern states... So that the rich state...

interested. So southern states were... God forbid they don't look interested in the survival. Yeah. I guess you're looking for what we call a heart, and that's not going to exist inside of a rich shell. Southern states are not down with this because they'd mostly paid off their debt, and this is only going to benefit the northern

states with debt. By the way, hilarious. The southern states were like, we're flush. So the plan draws protests. And... What is your problem with this perfect idea? For God's sake, the rich will be interested, you'll pay for it, it's awesome. It'll be fucked.

Part of it was redemption. So that meant to pay down the current domestic debt, which is basically owed to soldiers of the Revolutionary War. Oh, those. We didn't pay them. But they fuck off already. It's over. So the idea. You fought, it's done, you little lousses.

Go back. Good enough. Oh, you don't have a home? We'll go lay in the mud. Are you still? mad about not getting paid for the war we said you'd get paid for? Get out of here. So the government, the idea was the government would pay out securities at an issue to these

veterans. So basically they gave the veterans IOUs. Right. Right. IOUs are securities. So many of the soldiers, though, lost everything during the war because they weren't getting any money and ended up cashing out the IOUs for cents on the dollar. to speculators because they've got to feed their families.

So these speculators just take advantage of the desperation because they know or they believe the government's going to pay out the IOU at some point. Oh, okay. So right before Alexander presents his report on public credit, the value of the IOUs shoots up from 18 cents to 50 cents. So wealthy speculators send men to rural areas where news gets to more slowly. These are.

To buy up the IOUs. These are. You still have those? What are you holding on to them for, fella? That's fool's gold. I'll tell you what. We'll take it for 20 cents. I mean.

Excuse us while we run the fuck out of here. We have always just people just always been. I mean, well, yeah, listen, it's, it's just so fucking tiring. If it's not polymarket, it's insider trading. If it's not insider trading, it's just, it's all the same shit. You know, blockhead or. Yeah, all of it. Alexander was surprised that his friend James Madison strongly disagreed with the plan.

Madison thought it was unfair to veterans. In what? Excuse me. How in the fuck? In what way is this unfair to study? We are taking those IOUs from them. They need that because we didn't support them in the first place. So now they need that.

Is that where the one crutch look comes from? They were like, I could only afford the one. The first guy who like came in with two crutches, they were like, have you seen fancy pants? He's got two crutches. It's amazing people still join the military after. you know, because this is what's always been. I know. I mean, it's like

one of the few ways now to be like, hey, there's no jobs. Yeah. I'm outside of your high school. Yeah. Want some money? So Madison thinks that the soldiers sacrificed everything. They deserve to get the fair share of the securities.

They were given as pay instead of speculators getting it. I'm very lost. So he says the speculator should be reimbursed for what they paid for the IOUs, and then the rest given to the veterans. So that's a very like... I'm trying to figure out how that's fair.

The speculators will get their money back. The veterans will get their money. But the speculators could get all of the veterans money. Right, but what we're saying is they shouldn't. That the veterans... But the... The... Hold on.

The speculators are the rich. They're doing well. Yeah, they're... So let's get them where they need to be. No, they already are. But then, no, they could be way higher. No, but there's no, but we want all, rise all boats. The soldiers are weak.

What? The soldiers are weak and they can't fight us. And the speculators will be rich and we'll get, you know, that money's coming right back to us in a great way. Have you heard of a caviar cannon? I swear to God, I was at Tom's the other night and he has one. Crackers can suck my dick. Okay, I'm listening. Because this cannon, shoot.

Coveyama. Just into the mouth? Into your mouth. Oh, my God. It's just awesome. Okay, fuck the veterans. Yeah, well, fuck. Thank you.

Welcome. Alexander Hamilton. My name and Alexander Hamartan. So, Alexander. Can we do a class action lawsuit against Lin-Manuel Miranda? Well, you're going to get a churnout thing in a sec,

which I think you might actually think is worse. Alexander disagrees with Monroe's. Everything should be equal thing. he gets the speculators are profiting from the IOUs instead of the veterans he gets that we love that it's not ideal that's what he said it's not ideal but after quote the most mature reflection he decided it was a necessary evil I've done some thinking and I think I'm going to do it I think we should do it it it doesn't matter how much you think about it there's literally no way it's good. You're literally just saying you're just like, well, I thought about this.

I put some mature thought into it and I've decided that like the guys who fought just shouldn't have any money and it should just all go to the rich people because they bought it. Did a lot of soul searching out on that walk and I think I landed in a good place. So it turns out I'm evil. We should kill the veterans.

Yes. Use them as like what do you put in the dirt to make stuff grow up like a fertilizer. Yeah, totally. I completely agree. Biographer Ron Chernow wrote quote,

Hamilton stole the moral high ground from opponents. Are you ready? No. This is amazing. This is, this should be put on his tombstone. By arguing instead of being victims,

veterans who fought for America, and sold their IOUs to speculators were in fact showing a lack of faith in America whereas speculators who bought the IOUs had bet on America's future and should be rewarded. Oh my God. I submit that Ron Chernow has one of the darkest most evil brains in America.

Well, he kind of stole the moral high ground. Can you imagine writing that and then ending up in your book? Right? And someone not, first of all, the editor not going, hey, Ron, so this thing, this really undermines you as a human being. I think we could sneak it in, though. I think we could sneak it in.

No, it makes you look like a, like a poison, like a human stain. Here's the problem. Okay. When the veterans come to the VA or anything, the patriotism's gone. what? Well, they just keep asking for handouts. Well, they fought for the... Fucking, yes, awesome that they did that.

Okay. I mean, they put their lives on the line. 100%. 100%. And they don't get money, so they're... They got an I owe you. I know, but you can't eat off an IOU. Well, agree to disagree.

I've eaten off of a lot of IOUs. I bought a ton of them, and I made a shitload of money off them recently. But I think the thing that I'm trying to say is that that they're very whiny. Hold on. And the speculators, the bankers, they're the ones who are like, hey, I'm fucking into this. And yeah, are they doing it because they're getting so much?

Maybe. I don't know. I'm not sure. I just know that patriots eat and veterans chirp. As your publisher, I'm going to shoot you in the face. Alexander Hamilton? time. Wow.

What a fucking piece of shit. Isn't that absolutely like the level of just piece of shit you have to be, because he had to think about this. Well, it is actually, yeah. Well, I mean, you know, you don't riff evil. It gets diagrams. He had to like kind of come up there with his little word salad and be like, how do I mean? Moral high ground is important. He stole the moral high ground.

I mean. So Alexander responded to Madison's concerns about the veterans getting money by calling him, quote, womanish. Boom. Later. See around, baby. Nice try. Their friendship was over. Well, I guess I'd listen to you if you weren't ladylike.

They had been very close friends recently seen giggling together as they chased a pet monkey around a neighbor's yard. I'm out of here I'm fucking out of here what are you talking about what am I supposed to dislike these guys now can't give me to dislike them after their monkey monkey giggling

they're chasing they're also sometimes seen out on the street with Alexander carrying Madison on his back listen fun but you're not going to beat the monkey fun no you're not but Madison ended up funding the proposal

and Alexander's plan passed quickly in the house. Good. Good, good, good. Gareth Adelope is brought to you by Squarespace. Ah. All in one. Website, platforms that's going to help you stand out and succeed online.

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A.m. To try Notions developer platform today. Notion.com slash amp. Now, the assumption pan had a plan had problems. And Madison led the opposition. Alexander was losing his shit. sure America would not survive if it didn't happen. He became almost fanatical.

He made nightly visits to congressmen's homes to argue for his plan, offering, quote, promises, compromises, sacrifices, and threats. He sent lobbyists from Treasury, one walked around Congress, annoying reps, telling them that he didn't even, he didn't even know that he found, oh, sorry, one friend walked around Congress, annoying reps, telling those he didn't even know that he found. Alexander quote, damn sharp. He's sharp. You seen this guy? Hey, this smart fellow. Smart guy. Damn sharp. When every walks by, I'm like, smart guy. That guy's on it. Guy. You were seeing Chase's a monkey? That guy's up. I have. It's very fun.

Few politicians were... It's kind of Hank Paulsonish. Yeah. Yeah. Please. Please. fellow politicians were either devoted to him or hated him. Some saw him as arrogant. They didn't think a cabinet member should try to hold so much sway over Congress. And then he was acting too much like a British politician. Adams called him insolent and said one sip of wine made him silly and led to bragging about his accomplishments like, quote, a young girl about her brilliance and trinkets. Boy, I'll tell you what.

As much as they're trying to bury the lead on a lot of stuff, the hatred for women is really very out there. Really there. Embraced by it. It's a bipartisan affair. Alexander almost dueled with a congressman who called him a liar on the House floor and friends intervened to stop it. So the very powerful colony of Virginia hated his plan to assume state's debts as it would add $2 million to their own debt.

In April, the assumption plan was voted down again and the House voted to stop debating it. So it looks like it's dead. Right. Now, the location of the capital is being debated. It's temporarily in New York where Alexander obviously wants it to stay. But putting the capital on the Potomac River is what Virginians, Madison, and Jefferson want. They thought a northern capital would cater to the merchant and banking class instead of the rural constituents. So the battle for where the capital is is fucking crazy.

It's really ugly. The debates were so bad that Congress would adjourn each day without getting. getting anything done, they were, quote, too out of temper to do business together. Well, it's different to now. They just don't do it for other reasons. Yeah, they just do it for the banks. I think that's so funny, too. And like right now with the Supreme Court, how they're searing all these cases and all these

rulings because they have to go on their summer vacation. I mean, it is so, I cannot believe, sometimes you hear that shit come out where it's just like, because right before the Congress's vacation or they're, and you're just like, What? I wouldn't be telling people that that still exists. It's supposed to be so they can go meet with constituents, but they don't. But they don't. No, they go on vacation and they avoid meeting with constituents.

But the Supreme Court gets a summer break. Yeah. They're fucking tired. Well, they're all so old. I know, but even then, it's like, it's so fucking crazy. Yeah. Well, you know, Kavanaugh is just like, I'm all fucking wear a sombrero and do titty. Chats.

So Jefferson and Madison and Alexander have a private dinner on June 20th, 1790. How bad are women? They're terrible. How great are slaves? Great. Alexander's plan, so it's back to the assumption shit, which it looked dead. So Alexander's plan for state debt's assumption had been rejected by Congress five times now. So he's in a panic and no one really knows what happened at the deal.

dinner. Jefferson later said he was tricked by Hamilton. The Virginians apparently agreed to deliver votes of Alexander convinces Pennsylvania congressmen to allow the capital to be on the Potomac instead of in Philadelphia. So if it's not decided the dinner, it most probably said in motion that. But soon after, Washington, who's also a Virginian pushes reps to go along. and that's huge.

In July of 1790, Congress passes Alexander's assumption bill and the plan to have the capital in D.C. His entire financial plan had come to fruition. Right. Winners win, dude. It was two guys who were supposed to be, you know, a little more for the people, selling out the people to get the capital on their sweet little river area. It's cool.

The whole thing is just horse training for fucking people. Yeah. And it was dead. The assumption thing looked dead. Like it was never going to fucking happen. So the government relocates. So did he really care about the whatever? No.

No. So the government relocates to Philadelphia temporarily. And Alexander is not done fucking the non-rich. He taxes every gallon of whiskey made in the U.S. to make up a government shortfall. What else are you going to take? tax land? Well, I mean, like truly one of, yeah, exactly. I mean,

it's like the, okay, so you totally screw us and then the thing that helps us forget that you screw us a little bit, you're going to pay for more. You fucking assholes. So people are pissed, especially Philadelphia politicians who thought taxing their farmers would lead to a rebellion. Cute.

So the tax is, of course, supported by the wealthy, because they don't want to land tax. Washington supports it. A senator, quote, Mr. Hamilton is an all powerful, Mr. Hamilton is all powerful and fails in nothing he attempts. Now, one other thing Alexander wants is a central bank. And managed by private citizens, of course.

He must have been like, I can't believe this is happening. Dude, everything, literally everything. Yeah. It would be where federal funds were deposited. It would issue money, stimulate the economy, and loan money to the government, and give credit to private borrowers. It's just crazy. Really, like, it's just crazy.

It's like, the idea is just let's have a country club. A senator called it a, quote, aristocratic engine. In a good way? Or what was that guy like? That's awesome. Or was he like, this is a bullshit. So a lot of banks were seen as tools of the rich to swindle the poor at this time. Imagine.

Imagine that. Madison called the idea unconstitutional. Alexander complained that people were prejudiced against. By the way, I wanted to make it constitutional, but you guys wouldn't shut the fuck up. What'd you say, sorry? Alexander complained that people were prejudiced against banks. I'm actually used to were prejudice and banks.

That's why it's so great that Citizens United is finally put us on a level playing field. Oh, my God. That is one of those things where even now, the media will reach out and be like, well, Jamie Diamond has a prediction. It's like, you guys are fuck? You think I care what Jamie Diamond thinks? It's crazy. He said it was essential for prosperity and said if something's not expressly prohibited by the Constitution, it should be seen as an implied power of government.

So the bank issue turned Jefferson and Alexander into bitter enemies. One historian says they became obsessed with one another from then on. Jefferson worried a central bank would give the executive branch a dangerous amount of power and lead to a new money class rising up to push down those who made their living off the land. I mean, how fucking bad do you have to be for Jefferson to be like, you have some concerning view? What the fuck, you guys? Jefferson's famous view that, quote, the government is best, which governs least, was the opposite of what Alexander was fighting for, which he called, quote,

an excessive concern for the liberty of public men. It was approved by legislators, but Jefferson held out hope that Washington would veto it. He called the president, quote, an anchor of safety. Washington asked Alexander Jefferson to each write out their opinions on it. Oh, for football. What the fuck? What are you doing? You ready for a book?

Have you read the stand? Oh, my God. Jefferson rushes it. I call it lonesome dove. Jefferson rushes it and writes a succinct memorandum in a few hours. It said the government had no authority to establish a national bank and that allowing Congress this authority gave them license to do whatever they wanted. Hamilton, why does yours start off with?

I bet you're wondering how I ended up doing it. Washington gave that Jefferson's report to Alexander, who then went and wrote for a week, cranking out a report 10 times longer. Some of it is in Eliza's handwriting. Oh, Christ! Because he was just churning it out. Come on.

Go, woman. My hand hurts. Washington signed the first bank of the United States into existence on February 25, 1791. The acceptance of Alexander's interpretation of the Constitution's implied powers has influenced

the way politicians have used it ever since. A hundred years later, a politician called Alexander's doctrine of implied powers, quote, the most formidable weapon in the armory of the Constitution, capable of conferring

on the federal government powers of almost any extent. And that's the end of part two. What a fucking motherfucker. And that's what, like when you hear about the federal society, when you hear about a SCOTUS. and all those guys, they're this. That's what Scalia was.

All these fucking people. The Federalist Society has been pushing all their fucking judges everywhere, and they all believe this shit. And this is, I'm sorry, it's crazy fringe extremist shit. It just is. So this country has ruled, as much as they want to be like, socialist or extremists, no, the extremists are the guys in power doing everything. They're the fucking extremists.

Everyone else is just like, hey, can I just live and hang out? Well, I think that's sort of the thing, right? It's like the, like there is obviously like a very, an argument with a lot of teeth and a lot of people who are pushing for it and fighting for it more and more of the greater good. But that is such a more nebulous concept than I just want a profit. Totally. And, you know, it's like kind of an easier. I just want to make money any way possible. We'll always win out.

Yeah, that's like trying to punch water. Well, because it can find, it'll keep finding it. It'll find the way to make the money and then it destroys something. And by the time you realize it, they walk over the money and you're like, wait. Well, and if you look at what's happening in like here and the UK, you know, they are clearly very concerned about the people being able to communicate to each other in a new way. And now they are trying to. Cracking down. Now they're cracking down on the ability to convince each other.

It's very funny. It is funny. It's very funny for me to watch The Left just be like, no, I think we do need to take care of the kids. Motherfucker, have you not read history? They don't give a fuck about the kids. It's got nothing to do with the kids. Kids are going to be able to get fucking porn and whatever else they want. Nobody gives a shit about that.

Absolutely nobody making those laws of shit. It's not about that. It's about you and I putting our IDs in and them watching. getting all that information and knowing everything we're doing. That's all it's about. Yep. Continued more and more. Well, shout out to Hamilton, front of show.

Hamey, written by Brittany Cohen-Brown. Sources, Jefferson and Hamilton, The Rivalry that Forged a Nation by John Furling, Radical Hamilton, Economic Lessons from a Misunderstood founder by Christian Parenti. The Price of Greatness, Alexander Hamilton, James Madison, and the Creation of American Oligarchy by Jay Cost. the Whiskey Rebellion, George Washington, Alexander Hamilton, and the frontier rebels who changed America's newfound sovereignty by William Hogland,

not a nation of immigrants, settler colonialism, white supremacy, and a history of Eritory and exclusion by Roxanne Dunbar Ortiz. Hamilton's curse, how Jefferson's arch enemy betrayed the American Revolution by Thomas D. Lorenzo, Alexander Hamilton, by Ron Chernow, the Hamilton scheme, an epic tale of money and power in the American founding by William Hogland. It's in two ways.

Sometimes sheds on here is Hoagland and other times Hogland, so I'll look at that up. Fall and Founder, The Life of Aaron Burr by Nancy Eisenberg, One Nation Under Debt, Hamilton, Jefferson, and the history of what we owe by Robert Wright. Duel Alexander Hamilton, William Burr, and the Future of America by Thomas Fleming, an odious immoral thing by Jesse Sir Philippi Schuller Mansion State Historic Site. That time when Alexander Hamilton almost dueled James Monroe, Smithsonian Magazine Online, Alexander Hamilton, enslaver, question mark, New York Times, the pistol that killed a founding father,

the New York's Historical Society. I'll fillate that gun. And various primary sources available on Founders. dot our crows.gov So he's a real piece of shit and we're going to get into more of a piece of shit he was. He's so fucking Trumpian. I mean, he's like a smart

Trump. That's redundant. That guy's a smart guy. No, you're right. He's figured out how to make a pool blue for a day and a half. And kill ducks.

If you're not how to make a pool, kill, Dougs. Oh, fuck me.