The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 750 - Mary Dyer - Live

Episode Date: September 7, 2026

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine Bostonian OG Mary Dyer. Recorded live in Boston. SOURCESTOUR DATESOFFICIAL MERCHSQUARESPACE - Use OFFER CODE: DOLLOP to save 10%HIMSRocketmoney See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Squarespace. All in one website platform. It's going to help you stand out and succeed online. We are fully in with Squarespace. We've got all our websites, Garris is, mine is. We got the dollar sources. We got the dollopodcast.com where you can get your tickets for our upcoming tour in Australia. Go get it.

Click the links there. That's the kind of magic that's happening at Squarespace. You can go to our website, click on the tour page, and then click on the links. And then you can come to the show. If there was no square space, we wouldn't be able to tour. I'll go one further. I wouldn't have met Dave without Squarespace. That's right.

Would we be living together, you and I, if we didn't have a square space, in this little shed we have? I like to say I hope so, but I doubt it. I doubt it, too. Squarespace put us together, and that's why we're living in a shed in my mom's backyard. The shed, by the way, it's a square space. I love it, Gareth. It's why we're living together. Here's what we're saying.

Head to Squarespace.com slash Dobb for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code dollop to save 10% of your first purchase of a website or domain. That's Squarespace.com slash Dobb for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, you use OfferCode dollop to save 10% of your first purchase of a website or domain. Go get it. We're going to read a post from Reddit, the dollop subreddit. Oh, it's our favorite. It's our favorite Reddit.

By the way, I got kicked off Reddit. Yeah. But it's actually, all that happened was there was a story about a Canadian mom and her son and they had come down here for a family visit and, sorry, her daughter, and the daughter was seven and autistic, and so of course I put them in a detention center.

And so I said, hey, I hope that the ICE guys who do this get everything coming to them. And it's funny because what you meant was those sweet bonuses. Yes! So anyway, this post is good. So we just will read this as a disclaimer. A drunk per...

Sorry, the subject. Important. Live show tip. Shut the fuck up. A drunk person at the Buffalo show tonight was so damn annoying. Please don't get so drunk that you can't read the room and Gareth has to explicitly tell you to stop exclaiming things. The guys don't like it.

Your fellow audience members don't really like it. They aren't playing a show to just... you shut the fuck up. So that's, you know, just for everybody's... I will add to that. Every time someone in any forum brings up people talking in audience, every single time someone goes,

I was at this fucking show in Boston. Three years ago. And then they talk about this person who wouldn't stop talking at the Boston show. And this person is with us tonight. and we're tossing him off of the top. We're going to kill him. But so you have a reputation, so now let's fix that.

Never has a city been less interested in fixing a thing. At all! They're literally like, fuck you. Yeah, we can fix that, or I can talk at a thing I paid for, fuckface, how about that? How does that sound to you, Hollywood? How about this? I curb stumped you after the show, fancy pants. What do you think of that?

You threw an ass doll in the audience. Hey, high horse, come down. That honestly felt like I yelled, let's go Yankees. That's how the reaction was. Yeah, yeah. You're listening to the dollar. This is an American History podcast where each week I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to a Homer.

To a what? Homer. Homer. That's the nicest. Thank you. It's not that great. Like The Odyssey. Reynolds, who has no idea what the topic is going to be about.

That was kind. Thank you, buddy. A homer. Yes. There's other homers. Name one besides. It's Simpson. The model of an American.

That's what I mean. Yep. I am a perfect American. You're right. I just want to pay my taxes and bang your wife. That's all I want. That's right Wow

Things are not going Oh shit Before your fucking city started You see the little signs You're driving in 1630 This is why you should be ashamed of that time Imagine the racism in Boston In 1630

Oh my God 2026 racism is hard to wrangle Yeah these are the evolved ones Yeah 1600 they're like Jesus Christ Please stop Even Boston cops would be like Whoa slow down

What are you doing? Even Matt Damon was, or never mind. No, no. It's one of the good ones. Right. One of the good whites. He's a special white. Stop.

It was born in London. It's probably buried because she was born in London. Almost nothing is known of Marie's parents. It seems they died when she was young. Maria had a brother, William, and she was well-educated. In 60- Well-educated for back then. Yeah.

Lightning is good. God farting. Well, actually, I still think that's... As do I. Yeah. Marietta brother, William, and she was well-educated in 1633, now called Mary.

She married William Dyer in St. Martin in the field church in Westminster. So that's a famous church. Sure, yeah. England. That's where your people. Who gives a shit? Your people are from?

That is my people. No, you, if you were truly one of your people, like your mom would be like, oh, yes. Oh, she would. Oh, it's lovely, you go in there, and they've got the best postcards. You go, stop sending postcards. Did you get my postcard?

Yeah, what have you done with it? Well, it's in the trash. Oh. Oh, they've got a lovely gift shop. Do you need a mug? If you buy me another fucking mug, I'm gonna take you to court. Do you understand me?

If you give me one more mug, you know, you're the best part of the podcast. Oh, Mom, stop it. She knows... That day, it just sounds like he uses that chat chie-P-T thing. And then you've got your hard job. You deserve all the spoils.

And the attitude on him. My God. Does he think he's Elton Fricking John? Love mom. That's on the back of a postcard. She just sees me as the sexual part of the podcast. No, she doesn't. Her lips are so... solved. I'm not going to ask my follow-up.

So with the Nivia. My mother's been using Nivia and before Nivia existed. They can also be hard when they need to... Stop. William... The three people who knew what that meant really. William was a member of the prestigious fishmongers company.

That's right, yeah. Pot of fish. Yeah, I suppose we can spare a tiny pot. 14 tonnes or as we call it 46 boulders. What are measurements we've not figured. I get to put me mouth. Yeah, you want to eat it, yeah. Yeah, do this?

No. Most of this, no. Yeah, it's not eating fish. What are you fucking on about? Look at it. Yeah, it's all eating fish. Which... Well, you eat all of it.

It's not right. Why is your head so small? I don't think there's a fucking brain inside of that. You look like, and then this little fucking cue ball. You get small witch cats to spend the... And then a red... Stop it in me, ass. Oh my God.

Just be on the pay. Um, so... Back to history. Back to history. Um, after being an apprentice, at the fishmongers for nine years, he established a business selling small wares. Small wares.

Which you guys have tons of in England. The whole place is about small wares. It's still pretty good for small wares, to be quite honest. Ooh, that would be nice on the table. That could go in the bookshelf. It's totally trash. It's unnecessary. No, it's a little watermelon.

Look at that. Ooh, a tiny candle holder. That's perfect for somewhere. Oh, shiny stones. Oh, my goodness. Those cards. You'd think the empire isn't over. This was stolen wares.

The economy was very bad, and Puritans were being persecuted, so the Dyers decided to get the fuck out, and in the summer of 1635, they plunked down. 50 pounds to buy passage to Boston. Wow. Which is where you guys are. Mary was pregnant at the time. Who would make that journey pregnant?

What a great time. What a nightmare. They were always pregnant. Fair point. 50% of the time, it's like, maybe. Yeah. It's hard to tell because I'm always ill. Is it morning sickness?

Am I dying? It's hard to tell. I'm never well. So they arrive in Boston. They built a house on Summer Street. That's still there? Yeah. It's a big player.

Is that a big... Where a lot of people have houses now? No. No, we've all had to leave the cities. They slept on the main floor by the fireplace. The main floor by the fireplace. Sure. That's how you did it.

This was a Puritan society. so Bible reading, church attending, importing and selling, merchant wares, farming, daily chores, that sort of thing. A lot of wares. A lot of wares. Yeah. They bought 42 acres of meadow and woods outside the city. Great. Yeah.

Puritan life was about community and conformity. But when the diars landed, shisms were forming. Schism. Yeah. Shizum sounds like... What's a difference? Well, that one... Fuck you word.

No, you're just... They're like words. No, it just sounds like... Well, it's a C.H. Yeah, no, it just is too close to jism, if I'm being quite honest. Well, jisms are also forming. Oh. That's all those wet spots on the roads?

Okay, so schisms are forming. And Salem Minister, Roger Williams, was being attacked for having, quote, dangerous opinions about the land rights of Native Americans, and separation of church in state. I can only imagine where he fell. Yeah, yeah. Well, if they're mad about it,

that means he was like, let him live. Let them watch. How fucking dare you. God told us not to. Well, maybe don't let God be involved in your legislation. In October 1635, Williams was sentenced to banishment and given six weeks to leave.

Wow. It's a long time to get your shit together. Well, six weeks for a banishment. collection. Yeah, but if you got to get all, if you got to pack up your stuff, there's no boxes. I think it's a very, it's a very, that's very true. It's all, it's all donkey.

But that is a nice grace period to be like, you cannot be part of this community. You are souring everything we believe. Now get the fuck out. You have just under two months. Now, I can't bring you all with me. I'm going to start reading me.

Where will I put them? This can go on for a while. We're going to go on for a while. We're... I don't. That's when I decide I'm going to take other people's wares. I'm a wear wolf.

Oh, fuck. Absolutely nonsense. You're just you looking like... Okay. Real, too. What's real? The hair, it's not a wig. It's literally a shirt.

What are you doing? Give me your trinkets, you bitch. You're the same guy just being an ass. Oh, I've just woken up. What are micro products? Oh no. Was there a full moon?

You're literally the worst werewolf that's ever been. It's happened again. Nothing happened. Oh, so much more to pick to choose from now that I've been banished. You have six weeks. Flying by.

The next year, the community divided over a theological question. Okay, Governor John Winthrop and most ministers were challenged by Anne Hutchinson. A woman. Women could not become ministers, speak

in church, vote, or play a formal role in governance of the colony, or as we call it, 2029. Honestly. She was doing... How are they going to figure that out? They want... No, women are not going to

change their last name anymore, which will also drive them crazy. That will drive them crazy. It will be like, Yeah! Yeah! Okay. She was doing it all

in discussion groups in her home, and she said many ministers had strayed from the true teaching of the Bible. What? Salvation, salvation is a matter of grace,

and we're teaching the idea that salvation depended upon one's giving alms, praying, attending church, and doing good works. There you go. That's not too hard.

Except for the church part. Be nice, don't be a dick. Mary Dyer and Ann Hutchinson then became good friends. Oh, no. They're talking. Eiff. What do you reckon they're talking about? Better be...

Better be wares. It's probably our dicks. Yes. A perfect cocks. It's not what I'm hearing. Yes. Not what I'm hearing. Tip in full.

What? Small, even when erect. Filty. Falling off because of a cut. Yes. For you, I've heard the term field mushroom. Yes. Because it's inedible.

Make even the most normal ill. I don't think that's the meaning. Because it causes diarrhea. Yes. Mary, her husband, began regularly going, Anne her husband, began regularly going to Anne's religious lectures.

Then in May 1636, a supporter, Henry Vane, won election as the colony's new governor. He's a good guy. Yeah, but trust me, as good as a Puritan can be. Sure. All right, we'll take it.

They're all bad. This city was founded on fucking horrible human beings. But not like that, no ma. Yeah. Yeah, now he's out west. Just sucking parents dry. We just want their kids to have a sport to play. Nothing wrong with sucking parents dry.

Keep going. Hurry up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Show's filthy. So Henry Vane wins the election as the governor. But then the next year, John Winthrop was elected governor over Harry Vane. And Winthrop is not a fan of Hutchinson. and starts going after her.

And we've done Hutchinson in the, you remember. Yeah. Yeah, I think I was at 390. Do you want to summarize this part a little bit? The Hutchinson part? Well, the part when Winthrop got reelected. Yeah. Oh, well, it was crazy.

Yeah, no, no. So Winthrop takes power back, and everyone's like, what? But it's because they ran a guy with a stutter against him. who'd been in government way too long anyway, and at the debate just seemed like a fumbling old weirdo, and then you get the bad guy again. We've learned. And his eye filled with blood during the debate?

Yeah, one of this. Yeah, God sent a sign when he filled one of his eyes with blood. He was sort of like, no, don't. We were like, it'll work out. It'll work out. It'll work out. It'll work out. So, Mary Dyer gets pregnant, but in her seventh month, she starts having contractions.

It's not good. And so Anne was called. Who was called? Anne. Okay, right. Anne was called. And she comes to the dire home of the midwife. Okay.

Jane Hawkins. So it's a difficult labor, and the baby is still born and very deformed. Okay. And today, doctors would describe the baby as suffering from, uh, that's a word. Anencephaly? Encephalitis? Encephalitis. Anacephaly is what's got here.

And spina bifido. So it's a double. It's not a good one. Especially back then. Back then, they would, they called the baby a monster. Medically speaking. I'm a doctor, you see. We're going to hit you with some medical terms.

To Puritans, any good or ill fortune was seen as God's, sending a message. So William Dyer and Anne knew a stillborn child would be used by Winthrop and others to say God was very displeased with their heresy and dissension.

Oh, right. So they're like, well, that's what happened and that's... Yeah, you're out there chatting. You're your lady fucking talk. Yeah, right. This is why ladies shouldn't talk. Right. Well, let's be careful with how things can be taken out of context of the clip.

We live in a clip culture. No one would ever clip the dollop. No. Anne and another follower secretly buried the baby in the woods. Okay. But the general court summoned Anne to appear in November. Okay.

For just sort of her house sermons and all that shit. Well, because she had... Oh yeah, no, you're right. They don't know about the day. Yeah, they don't know. So, yeah, so they bring her in because she's just chatty. Right.

Right? She's a lady talking too much. Right. She faced charges of traducing the ministers. Producing? Traducing. Okay. If you say so, sir. I don't know what that word is.

Yeah, I didn't look it up. Of the colony. It's like a traduction. And she was convicted after... It's when you put a turkey in a duck for Thanksgiving. I don't think that's possible. everything's possible. You could put a duck in a turkey.

You absolutely can't. I just said you can't put a turkey in a duck and someone out there went, what? Because she's right. I want to watch you put a turkey in a fucking duck. That is absolutely not happening. You should, yeah, look over here. I'll do it. I'm my only fans.

It's real easy. Kill a turkey, get a duck horny. Boom. Into the oven. Dave's doing a goodwill hunting and preemptive. over the traducing. He's doing what we call traduction.

Kill a turkey. Kill a turkey. He thought to himself. Mm-hmm. Yes. How are you still, how are you fitting the turkey, which is larger?

Pork, screw penis. Keep going. I get to have a coarse screw penis. I'm just saying it's bigger. Move on. It's over. Just because it's bigger

doesn't mean you can't. Move on. Yeah. So she's convicted after a two-day trial, mostly because she said she was deceiving direct revelations from God. Okay. So she's... If your lady, you really can't say that.

Yeah. That's a hard, I mean, yeah. What's so funny is I, no, you're not. Only we're talking to God. Yeah. Dare you. How foolish woman. A woman.

God talking to a woman. Likely. God only talks to us men. Bros. Yes. He's a bro. He's a bro. Mother Winthrop wanted her banished, and most magistrates agreed.

You have eight months. Pack your knives and go. You will leave four seasons from now. You could stay in the house until then. Anne was kept under house arrest in Roxbury that winter, and had to leave by spring. She could still possibly be excommunicated. So it's kind of, you're kind of right. Like she had a lot of fucking time.

It's like a soft excommunicated. In two years, you must leave. You fucking keep it up. By then there might be a different governor and you'll get a stay. Her church trial was in March 1638 in Boston. Everyone expected her to be thrown out of the religion. Sure enough. Reverend Williams.

Who's that? That's Reverend Williams. Okay. Announced she was cast out of the church. quote, as a leper. But not really. No, not really. I mean, it's not like you can go out.

So even back then, were there more lepers back then? Well, lepers were bad back then. They were like, you're going to turn me to stone or whatever. Whoa. But also the same thing with a bad woman. All right, whatever. Hey, it's worked out pretty good now. We figured it out.

Things are good. So Anne just walks out of the church and Mary follows behind her. and then they walk hand in hand. They're like, we're gay or whatever. I don't know. It's not a good thing to do at this moment. I wouldn't do it. Well, you wouldn't be able to do it.

It's a good time to be in the closet. This is one of them. I dare you. People immediately wondered who she was. One asked, quote, who was that woman? And another responded, it is the mother of a monster.

So they knew that she had had a baby that wasn't great. Or they're just thinking of like, Maybe they think this is Godzilla's mom. Sure. Jesus. Or mothra. They're really sticking, no. But they're really sticking to the monster thing for some real sweet people who are talking to God all the time about empathy.

Yeah. Governor Winthrop began an investigation, and this led them to Goody Hawkins and John Cotton. So John Cotton revealed the details of the birth. And Winthrop immediately started telling people about it and ordered the body exhumed so he could examine. himself. Jesus fucking Christ. Show me the baby. So applicable to today.

You can see this happening today. Yes. Wait, we're going to find her and make sure she's okay. Yeah. Yeah. We love them all equally. I dig him all!

Around the same time, William Dyer met with 17 other men in Boston. So the 17 men were on the Anne side of the Winthrop and conflict, and they decided to incorporate themselves into a, quote, body politic to submit their persons, lives and estates

unto Lord Jesus and lay a foundation of a Christian state where all who bore the name might worship God according to the dictates of conscience. Oh, for fuck's sake. Unodd by civil power. So this. So what? They're just going to be the godiest goders who ever got it. This is the very first document in America to promise religious freedom.

Oh. And it is now known as the Portsmouth Compact. That looks like a set list. Okay. Yeah, well, they really rushed it. I mean, they had to write it on a bar towel. They did not take a lot of time. All right, there we go.

We're fucking close, dude. Let's finish this. I am so hammond. Shut the fuck up. Oh, my God. So you could do whatever the fuck? I get another chinatonic over here. Quiet.

All right. So whatever the fuck you want to do. I'm telling you, it's Larry Bird. Quiet. Right Larry Bird down there. No, you fucking white idiot. All right. So you can do whatever the fuck you want.

Don't be a fucking cock. You figure it. Don't call babies monsters. That's fucking crazy, dude. That's all. Put no cops in there. No car. Well, endless fucking traffic.

No scooters. Everything's made a bridge. where you want to walk. Fucking so stupid. Wild burgers. That's your... That's it, dude. Oh my...

And then waking up the next day. What are we right? What are we doing? Dude, we were so drunk we said you can worship whoever the fuck you want. God damn it. Do we send that out? Oh, shit, we better not of...

Oh, fuck. Two women are holding fucking hands, dude. Oh, what the fuck! Oh, shit. Dude, I just made a shisham. Whenever you guys are feeling cocky about your fucking city. Oh, here we go. Look at you.

You know. Never forget that you gave the world the fucking Walbergs. Excuse me. If you believe in quantum physics, Mark Wahlberg stopped 9-11 on one of them. You simple fool. Sometimes I watch the movie The Happening just to try to watch Mark Wahlberg be scared of grass. It's amazing. What's...

What's going on over there? That's a really bad Mark Wahlberg. Dude, what are we even looking at right now? This is crazy. I think it's a grass. What if my brother and I opened a bunch of restaurants we serve burgers? I think the weeds are coming.

The what are coming? The weeds. Cut. Mark. What? I'm acting scared. Yeah, you don't need to be that scared. So we need to be able to hear you. Okay. Yeah, so don't do whisper. Do regular Mark.

Oh, this crisis coming. Okay. That's good. That's better. There you go. Good. If you say anything bad about Mark Wahlberg, you never work in Hollywood again. That explains a lot. William Dyer and others then sailed south to land where they could put their plan into action. They sailed to Cape Cod and then walked overland on Indian trails through the woods to the home. of Roger Williams at the north end of

Nagaransat Bay, Nagaraghan. Who fucking can? Nagaragun Nagaragun Sackalakum. Nobody gives a shit about your rich island. Just say it right. Fuck off. Okay.

Naranginsent? William. Nackew. You say it. Nackin-Raxil. Williams told them the island of adequate... Aquindic.

Chapaquitic. Aquindic. Aquindic? Aquindic? That's what Aquaman had. Might be a good home for their new Christian state. So they went to Cape Cod to basically open a Christian state? Yes.

If this is how they made those potato chips, I will punch you. If this is the story of the potato chips. This is what it is. It's all going to the potato chip. But one day when Mary was shaving off the potato skin, she kept going. She realized that when she put them in oil, they were tasty. Oh. So he helped them purchase the island from Native Americans for 40 white wampy beads,

10 coats, and 10 and 20 hose. Wait, what is the trade? Some beads. Some beads? Some beads? Some beads? 40 white wampy beads. Wampy beads? That's right.

What? Ten coats. What's a wampy? I don't know what a wampy bead is. It's a white bead. It's like, it's white. Oh, okay. It's what spring breakers get.

Yeah. Ten coats and 20 hoes. Ten coats and 20 hoes. Jesus Christ. Okay. It's the Snoop Dog. And the natives, in turn, were promised fishing and hunting rights on the island. That's not happening.

They didn't know who they were up against. They were like, no people. can lie this much. How's your wampi? Cut to 400 years later, Iran's like, wait, what? You keep... We're going to give you a bunch of wampy beads.

You can fish wherever you want with your wampy beads and your beautiful coats. These jackets are beautiful, great material. With that and your wampy beads, you will be perfect for Marlago, where you can go, whatever you want. So William returned to Boston. I came from Iran and I have a bunch of beans.

We're going to get a stock. And they've agreed no more fighting. We got everything we want. $19 oil. No more soil. Wait, did we want $19? We did. Oh, absolutely.

it's great trust me I have pretty bad diarrhea and dementia we've got this okay wait do I have my phone doesn't matter I gotta read what he said the other day

because it's amazing come on it's so fucking great I sent it to like I know what he said Larry Bird is by far the greatest basketball player of all time

Nobody's better He looks like an albino clown And he's number one Before him No one dunked the ball This is on Friday At 12.03 PM President Trump told reporters

He wanted a ceasefire with Iran We won a ceasefire At 1205 he declared victory It's over, we won At 1207 he announced He was sending the Marines to Iran The Marines are finally going To Iran

At 1208, he said no boots on the ground. There will be no Marines or other boots. At 1211, he said he did not want a ceasefire. We reject the offer. At 1216, he declared victory again. We have won, officially. It's official. We're number one.

At 12 is 17, he asked for a ceasefire. We demand a ceasefire, but with a question mark. At 1223, he told NATO they were cowards. You are all a bunch of pussies. At 1229, he said Iran was begging for a ceasefire. They are literally on their hands and knees. Begging. At 1231, he said everything was perfect.

Everything's never been better before. At 1236, he said $500 oil for a barrel was a good thing. We want it expensive. At 1237, he demanded Iran open. the Strait of Hormuz. Enough bullshit. Give it to us. It's ours, Iran. At 1239, he said the Strait of Hormuz

was never closed. It's been open like a 7-Eleven the whole time. He said the U.S. was not at war with Iran. There has been no war. The last two weeks have been an apparition. We're going to men in black

everybody's brain. A minute later, he declared victory in Iran. And... I feel confident. That was easy. I feel like it's all fine. It's cool to have another president with dementia. It's like three or four now.

It's hard to keep track. Well? Yes. The fucking first week, Ray was president in 1980. He went into a fucking office and said, I used to have this desk. And it was like, no, you played that as a character in a movie. You know, this is my first. fifth time being the president.

And my least favorite. Okay. So William... Back to crazy. William returns to Boston to gather his family and some belongings. And the dire family left for Portsmouth or Pocasset, as it

was called at the time, on April 26th. It's a very primitive settlement and turned out to have its own division split between supporters of William Hutchinson, whose Anne's husband, and William Cottington, who who gives a fuck.

Sure. In the end, 18 families left and founded a new community at the south tip of aquedict, aquedict. Aquedoc. Aquedict. Aquedict. Aquedict Island, which would be called Newport. Your state's bullshit.

We're only keeping it because they have two Dakotas, but if there's ever one Dakota like it should be, we're going to absorb you into Massachusetts. It's great. be here. I think 50% of our states could be absorbed into other states. Yep. Dave has a good

pitch. It's called eight states. Eight states. We're now eight states. I'm calling it, hey, Vermont. Why? That's just you have said, showing the leftist you have no loyalty. Vermont is a layup. You guys know what that is. Larry Bird invented it.

Greatest basketball player of all time. Yeah, whitest. That's why, well, that's why you're against him because you're racist. The dyers were among them, even though it meant Mary leaving her good friend Anne Hutchinson. So Mary spent much of the 1640s raising six kids and doing the many chores to survive in a very wild place. In 1643, Mary learned that Anne had been killed by Native Americans. We all know that from the episode. She deserved it. That sounds like a Trump. I won't do it. The dollop is brought to you by Squarespace,

the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online, which is exactly what it does, Reynolds. And it's what I've done. If anything, you're holding back Squarespace on your own website. You are the problem. No. Squarespace has done every single thing it can to make you successful. I agree, but I'm not a problem.

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Grow your band and get played in all one place. All of our website, every single one, there was Squarespace. Gareth's one, mine, the sources page for the dollop, the podcast.com, where you can get your tickets for our upcoming tour. That's all right up there on Squarespace, because it's easy to use.

You don't have to update stuff. It just looks good. Don't even get me started on the SEO tools, because that's just next level stuff. Head to Squarespace.com slash dollop for a free trial, and when you're ready to launch, you use offer code dollop to save 10%

off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's Squarespace.com slash dollop for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code dollop to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. The dollop is also brought to you by Hymns. Sexual Health ED. You know what I'm talking about.

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I'm pregnant again. This is number nine. This one's not a monster. Jesus Christ, so many. Easy, Ted. In 1650, she took a ship to England without her family. Nice. During this trip, Mary became involved with the seekers.

The seekers. The seekers had broken from the Anglican church and adopted the motto, quote, better not to stand still, but keep searching with an open mind. Right. That's blasphemy. Sure, absolutely.

Yeah, stand still and stop saying shit. That's the move. Stand there and shut up. So disagreements now break out in Rhode Island and they sought answers in England. By the way, talk about a state we don't need. Holy shit. Goodbye.

I know a lot of people came from there tonight, but stop it. I mean, you're called the Road Ayrs. an island. Yeah, you're basically a house. After William Dyer, Roger Williams and John Clark arrived in London in 1651 to

secure a new Rhode Island charter. And then he went back to Rhode Island in late 1652 and he was very disappointed that Mary did not join him. That's his wife. Right. Mary met the king of the seekers,

George Fox. Hello. Fox had been had founded a new religion and Mary wanted to learn more about it. So they're just coming up with religions left and right at this point. Yeah, but we still are. I know, no, I do think that's one of the things that's always very strange. It's like, couldn't you just kind of like, you know, cinch it up and just say it's like five things? Like, be good, maybe someone's up there, chill out, you know.

No, because it's all right. Take a, don't eat after dark a couple times a year and, you know what I mean? But it's all about getting laid. What is? New religions are all about fucking. new people. Oh. Yeah.

What are they called? They don't hate it. Fucking suckies. What? Yeah. Gonna need you to fucking to suck. My religion. The Lord have asked ye.

Eat that ass, sir. You can 69, but with butts, just try. They're always hurting their necks. Go down, Mores. Get down on your church a butt. Put them on your tongue.

Figure it. Put him a condom on your tongue. tongue. It doesn't matter how you do it. What would that prevent? The Lord hath told us there is a way. What are you preventing my... Any holes... What are you preventing by putting a condom on your tongue?

Look, there are times when you want to be careful. Nothing wrong with that. There's no judgment in this church. I think there's a lot of judgment. Maybe I started riffing a little hard when I said the condom. On the tongue.

All right. So the comment's not on the tongue. You could put it on your tongue. But for fun. The Lord has spoke. Fox had founded a new religion and Mary wanted to learn more about it. And Fox believed men and women were equal in God's eyes. And what the fuck?

Everything hurts now. It was just supposed to be about collecting wares. And that each sex had an equal opportunity to spread God's work. And he said Mary should become a Quaker elder. A Quaker elder. And quote, spread God's seed. Where better to spread God's seed than America? The Quakers believe God can be found in silence's nature and the process of individual growth.

Have you seen that? Yeah. They refused to tip their hats to superiors, believing everyone was equal. Okay. They would not take oaths to government because only God was owned, owed uncompromised loyalty. All of this really upset Orthodox and hierarchical Puritans. Thank God.

Outfit wise. Yeah. Our worst religion? Yep. I like a lot of the edicts, obviously, but I mean, sweet God. Puritans with their little fucking shoes. Yeah. They're the worst.

I guess. Wakers were a big hat people. But big hats aren't a problem. The buckles and shit were. thing, it just would be like once you'd get a Quaker naked, you'd be like, oh, had no clue what was under there. How dare you say, you, Quaker, naked. A Quaker naked.

Quaker's never got naked. Quaker's never got naked. How dare you? I just am saying, look, you can't judge anything there. Okay, well, how about the new governor, George Endicott. So he becomes governor in 1649. he was even more intolerant than Governor Winthrop. Shocking.

And the idea of Quakers getting a foothold in the colony was inconceivable. When the first Quaker woman landed in Boston, women, they were taken straight to jail for three weeks and then deported right back to England. What's with the jail part? Well, you can't just let him wander about. Doing woman things. All right, you'll go to jail for three weeks. Then back, he'll go.

Tell everyone. Yes, come here. That's why. Do not come here. Yeah, put him in prison, torture him a little bit, send them back. Oh, the torture, okay, cool. I'm sure, what else would you do with women in prison? Let them just sit there?

Yeah. You're a Puritan. You got a fucking... I wish it sounded more foreign than it does. August 9th, 1656, eight Quakers arrived in Boston. Endicott realized he needed to step it up to stop the menace. the Quakers were examined in the Massachusetts General Court, and they demanded to be immediately released.

They said there was no law that justified their detention, and they were right. They had broken no laws. That doesn't matter. So Endicott realized he had to pass some laws. They will now work at airport security. Somehow. Two months later, the general court adopted the first of a series of increasingly

draconian laws to keep Quakers out of the colony. The first law find any master or commander of a ship that brought Quakers into Boston. Quakers had to be jailed or deported, and the ones sent to jail were to be severely whipped and kept constantly working. It's hard to work when you're getting whipped, but tell you what, if you enjoy your job, you can do it. Amazon. Here at Amazon,

we understand how much whipping hurts. But it's our way of saying, get those colored crayons in that package a little faster. Here's the battery pack in the box. That's good. Amazon, is it hard to drive when being whipped? Of course it is. But if that means you're a little more scared to fuck up the address,

well, we've done our job. Mary Dawn. Jeff Bezos has a submarine. Isn't that worth it? Amazon, am I the only one who finds that little smile with the arrow really fucking upsetting? Amazon, you'll all work for us soon enough. Don't forget Prime Day. when they were like,

so Amazon's interested in buying your podcasts? We are waiting for that moment. Well, they definitely wanted to be advertisers and there was a lot of back and forth. Yeah. It's going to be great when we sell this show to Amazon. Oh! And then just jump off.

So great. Just go move to like an island alone where we're like... I probably knew all of this, the anti-Quaker stuff, when she landed in Boston in the late winter of 1657. She planned to spread the good news about Quakerism. Great. But does she know about the jailings?

She does. Okay. Mary and fellow Quaker and Burden, not a great name for this. Nope. Were immediately put in dark cells with boarded up windows for two and a half months. Jesus Christ.

Well, they could have been trying to hatch them. When they came out, They were fully British. Eh, eh. My fingers are fooling off. That's good. Mary did manage to get a note to William, telling him where she was,

and William went straight to the home of Governor Endicott and demanded that Mary be freed. So at this point, William was a prominent figure in Rhode Island, and Boston authorities would back him. So Endicott freed Mary on the condition that she immediately leave the colony and not talk to anyone while getting the

fuck out. Such an easy thing to enforce. Like literally a person on horseback be like, get on the boat. Yeah. But it feels like you're setting me up for she didn't do that. So, with Marion Rhode Island, and a con went

harder at Quakers who came into Massachusetts. Fines were increased and anyone who helped them would now get punished. For men, an ear was cut off for the first time you re-entered the colony. Jesus. By the way, look, I have my beliefs.

I've seen ears going. I'm like, yeah. Take care. Is that boat going? All right. We'll see you. A second ear was cut off for a second offense. Jesus Christ. For the third, quote, they shall have their tongues bored through with a hot iron. That's why you wear a condom. Safety first.

Fuck me. So, I mean, they really... Look, if you're trying to get people to stop hearing about Quakerism, you are attacking the three ports of call that I would say are the most important. These are all things I would turn my... Yeah, I mean, you're unable to go around anymore

to like a no-eared guy and be like, yeah, ha, ha, ha, ha. Oh, ha, ha. Got it, but... That's just... men, though. That's just men. Women got whippings. What

would you, what are you picking? Whippings? What? If you got to pick whippings or ears and tongue. Oh, I take whipping. Yeah, whippings. Yeah. 100%. Yeah. I like my ears. Yeah, and I love your ears.

And I love your tongue, buddy. And it loves your ears. I figured out of the way, eat pussy with my nose. I saw the worst porno today. I was just searching and I actually put

in nose. But on October 1658, they still have a Quaker problem. So the Quakers are still coming. So they crank up the punishments. Oh no.

And the general court, to deal with the sect that, quote, published and maintained many dangerous and horrid tenants authorized prison time, then banishment upon pain of death. That doesn't seem worse to me. So they're banishing them by killing them. Oh, banishment by death?

Yeah. All right, get out. By dying. They would get six weeks. Yeah, that was fucking nuts, that was. Now you're just going to die. And then you're off. We're banishing you up that way.

Oh, sorry, down yonder. That's right. So, because all the Quakers kept coming back, so now they're like, we've got to kill him because they're not getting the hint. They have no ears and the holes in their tongue. I'm not a Quaker. Me?

What do you say? I'm not a Quaker at all. In 1661, a declaration of the sufferings of the people of God was published. It was a long list of punishments inflicted on Quakers from 1656 to 1660. Oh, no.

Sick wait from when? Five years. Five years. Fifty-six to 60. So it included strip searches of women, whippings with three-quartered ropes, with knots on the end, quote, with as much strength as they could be

by the arm of the executioner. 64 imprisonments, 25 banishments, near starbations, held in irons, branded on the hands, chain to logs in the wintertime. Ooh, that's the worst one so far.

Ears cut off. Well, we've heard it. Seizures of homes and executions and forced to listen to the Joe Rogan experience. Is that true? Jamie, look that up. What?

I mean, the log winner one is the worst. The log and the one is the worst. I mean, it's death, but it's like, the idea of killing someone after that, to me, ears tongue still, log winter is the worst one. All right, we'll see you in the spring. I don't think you will. It's fucking cold.

What if they cut your ears off and then tied to the log? Worse. Yeah? Yeah. What if they, and then they put Rogan on him, that's... Only way to listen to Rogan, with no ears. Mary Dyer stayed in Rhode Island before heading to New Haven,

possibly to convert people. She was immediately, quote, set on a horse in order to leave the colony. Okay. In 1658, she was in Providence when she heard three of her Quaker friends, each had an ear cut off, and so Mary and four of her friends

decided to go to Boston to protest the punishments, and they were immediately jailed. Okay. What they think, yeah. Yeah. But she still has her ears and her tongue? Yeah. Because they're just getting whipped mainly.

Yeah. But now she's jailed. Even at this point, I cut an ear off of her. Yeah. I'm a little tired, okay? It's enough, Mary. We get it. You're the Larry Bird of Quakers.

After a... As in, there's one better. Well, Larry Burns, the... After a few months in the awful Boston jail, marrying three other Quakers, William Robinson, Marmaduke Stevenson. Hello.

That's me. Marmaduke Stevenson. Broom. I suppose you're wondering what I've done wrong. No. Well, I'm a bit of a criminal, you see. I actually don't care. Care for a smoking drink.

No? Well, I'll have one. How do we get you shut up? What? I'll just cut off your ears I'm fine Oh no wait No

I like marmaduke the dog better That's a good marmaduke I don't know who that is old man What the fuck? Shut up A weird reference Also Nicholas Davis And they were sentenced to banishment

Upon pain of death Okay So death Right So Mary goes to Newport, but Robinson and Stevenson were again arrested for holding Quaker meetings in the woods. In the woods. Hey, you guys want to... Look, I just think we should pretty much be able to do whatever we want to do.

Who goes that? We should have brought blankets. So they're facing execution. And Mary felt, quote, called upon to return to Boston and support her friends. She was quickly arrested and jailed. And now facing death. William wrote a letter to the Court of Assistance, and he called the jail conditions, quote,

Worse than hogs or dogs, and said she had nothing to sit or lie down upon but dust. That's like a Yelp review. It is. That's like a Kareny Yelp review. Yeah. Had nothing to lay down on my dust. If you're laying in dust, that's better than hogs,

because there would be mud. Yeah, see, there's not good. I know, but dust is, I'm just saying dust is better. It was horrible. I had to lay in dust. Oh, who cares? When I was a boy, dust was a dream. He laid in nothing.

Literally went down, nothing was there, falling all the whole time. Horrible. Dust was a dream. Can I see a question? No. The fuck are you talking about it? When I was young back then, before them, dust, oh, imagine.

Lovely that was. Oh, you prayed for dust. Instead, every time you went down to bed, you just were perpetually just spinning and spiraling through nothingness. Open at some point it would stop. And the only reason you'd fall asleep was because you'd lose consciousness. Do you think these might have been dreams? Whoa.

Yeah, I think you're just, you're just. dreaming. Whoa. Ah, fucking hell. What were you? He said she came not to prophetize but to visit her friends in prison and that laws prohibiting

travel violated basic rights. Quote, what hath not people in America the same liberty as beasts and birds to pass the land or air without examination? Wait, with what to pass? You should be able to fucking walk through like a fucking badger or a fucking crow. Or a bird?

Crow. I said crow. Oh, I thought I heard birds. No, I said crow. Who will be in future be the best basketball player of all time by white people? And you've seen the trash talking video. Stop. Whoa.

Where he says falling backwards off the... You've seen it. He all talk trash. Not like that, motherfucker. You're such a fuck. It's such an idiot. You're an idiot. You're a white dummy.

Oh, my God. You are so fucking stupid. Nothing but that. No, it's not. Check this out. Motherfucker. Whoa. Fucking dude named Bird

who grew to look like a bird origin story of Big Bird. Do you guys know what I'm talking about when he did the trash talk? Did they know what you're talking? It's the greatest trash talking thing in the history of sports. It's insane There is a white man masturbating up there

Yes You are so racist You are so racist Oh gosh You belong on first take You hate whites You should be on first take Now hold on Dave

I don't know what first take is Yes you do I really don't Yeah you do I really don't Who's on first take Stop it Your boy Skip Baylis

I love Skip Baylis Okay And he said God's law to not allow a punishment for what she had done to carry out the punishment would be murder and family oppression. Okay. So, in October 20th, 1659, Mary Robinson and Stevenson appeared before the general court, and Governor Endicott lectured them, quote, Neither whippings, no imprisoning, nor cutting of ears,

nor banishment you upon pain of death would keep you from amongst us. Then he ruled that they would be hanged until death. That's obviously. Hanged until alive. Mary said, quote, The will of Lord be done. And Endicott told the marshal to take her away. And Mary replied, quote,

Yeah, joyfully I go. supposed to be upset In a last-ditch attempt to save her life, Mary's son, William Jr. had the frigate he was on that was going to the Azores, which is a great spot. Detour to Boston so he could

plead for his mother's life. He met with a governor in his favor was that there would be political costs for executing a woman. Oh, those were the days. That is a dark sentence. Endicott, abusing his power, would put the colony's charter in jeopardy.

So they came up with a plan. Oh, no. Hanged until almost dead. Yes. She and the two men would be taken to the gallows. The two dudes would be executed. And after the noose was put around her neck, she would get a repeave. A reprieve.

And a reprieve. And a reprieve. We've all had that. Quote, she needs to experience the chill of death to get some sense in her head. So the plan was that she would know. She wouldn't? But he made it. The son made a deal with the governor.

He's like, I won't tell her, but this is super fucked up, obviously. I'm going to meet with her in 15 minutes. But that'll teach my mom. Now she'll fucking know. He will watch those two guys die, and then she'll find out that I knew. That'll be a whole fucking thing. We are really talking about a bad relationship, but okay. So then he gets back on his ship and he sails off.

Wow, he doesn't even stick around? Why would you stick around to see your mom's almost... Live? Live! But then it would be like, why are you here? I was going to watch you hang, Mom? Like, it's a hard one. It's a hard one.

There's a secret. Don't worry about it. That two guys are going to... I'll show you the video. October 27th, 1659. I'll show you the documentary series. I'm going to fucking break your neck. October 27, 1659,

Mary made the long mile walk to the jail from the gallows with, sorry. Gallows from the jail. From the, she went, hold on, I got it. From the jail. To the gallows to the jail. Go ahead. With Stevenson and Robinson.

So it's a really big event. There's 200 or so soldiers, guns, sword, bikes, flags flying. The soldiers... There was tailgating. The soldiers were loudly beating their... drum so people couldn't talk to the prisoners. Halifax is a city I've always wanted to properly explore. I'm talking about walking the waterfront with a coffee in hand,

finding whatever little seafood shack like Evans Fresh Seafoods over in Dartmouth, owned by a local fisherman family doling out, Cadian-style fish and chips. The kind of place the locals actually go to. That's my kind of drip. Here's where it gets practical, though. The second I start planning a trip like that, I think about my own home, just sitting empty when I'm gone. I could be listing it on Airbnb.

Someone gets a real place to stay in in a real part of the city, a charming walkable neighborhood where you can experience the city at a slower pace. Guests can explore the trails and scenic views of our nearby park, catch the glow of the city at sunset

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Whether it's a few days away or a couple of weeks, listing your home on Airbnb can help earn you a little extra cash to fund more trips like this. Home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.com. The dollop is brought to you by Quince. You know those pieces in your closet that you find yourself just wearing repeatedly over and over and over. The sweater, it goes with everything, right? The perfect pair of pants or the tea you somehow just grab first every time.

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Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. It's now available in Canada and the UK too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash dollop. They arrived at the tree. It's a tree, by the way. Oh, a tree gallop. I love that, by the way. Yeah.

It's so rustic. I really do. I just think it's like, it gets you, it's autuminal. I just love that so much more than these sort of like constructed gallows. I mean, again, it's sort of, I understand the breadth, like, it's a very difficult situation. There's a lot of bread. It's natural. but I love that.

Yeah. So much better. You build your little thing, it's great. So Robinson went first, then Stevenson. How do you pick that? Yep. I don't think you pick it. I think they pick it.

Oh, they do. Yeah. All right. They're gone. And then Mary stepped up the ladder, and they tied her dress around her legs and put the noose around her neck because if she fell down,

I want to, who, and show the... I cannot believe that in this time that was something they were kind of, Hint yourself. You can't see... And we will be very respectful of your nevers. We can't see the knickers. So we'll tie it down so nobody sees your bits.

By the way, you will be dead in five minutes. But we don't want anyone to see it. All right. There you are. Bit of a mermaid look. Would have been hilarious to not wear any underpants, though. Last revenge. Oh,

what the fuck? Keep her alive. I went to have my tongue out. Edward Burrow wrote, quote, As the hangman was ready to turn her off, they cried out. Stop, oosh! For she was reprieved! And having loosed her feet bade her come down.

But she was not forward to come down, but stood still saying she was there willing to suffer as her brethren did unless they would null their wicked law but they pulled her down. So she's like So she's like, kill me, fuck your law and they're like, no, get down. No, we made

a deal with you. With the, ooh. You made a deal with who? No. With whom? Larry Bert. I mean that, didn't he come off the bench?

Yeah. Mary was returned to her cell a couple, she was like, What the fuck just happened? Oh, yeah. But that's the whole point. And Akai, he's trying to be like, me, sneaky.

I don't only eat sausages. A couple days later, she was escorted out of Boston by four men on horses, and after a short time in Rhode Island, she joined her neighbors on a sailing trip to Shelter Island. So she spent a few nice relaxing months on Shelter Island, and she held Quaker meetings in a nearby woods for Native America, and slaves. Jesus, this woman.

A sugar trader wrote, quote, Dyer was a comely woman. Is Cumley attractive or is it like not attractive? It is attractive. Every woman is like, idiot. I was the... It's got cum in the fucking word so you can figure it out, idiot. But I always thought it was not attractive.

I had never even heard the fucking thing before. What do I know? Homley's not... Homely is the opposite. You know, I would say homely should be ugly and a whaley should be attractive. But comely, comely makes sense for being attractive. It does. I'm not even being...

That sounds like... Oh, so comely, T. was attractive? Oh, cumly. Beautiful and hot. It's really even weird, don't we eat the wine glass in your hands. Gonna make a schism na... So Dyer was a comely woman

with a grave matron who even... Oh, she's comely. who even shined in the image of God, we had several brave meetings here together. But when the general court put out a declaration intended for those in London that justified their persecution of Quakers and bragged about the reprieve of Mary,

she felt she needed to straighten this shit out and headed for Boston. And... Fuck, yes, that's awesome. She was immediately arrested. Still, that. fucking walk. But her husband's like, oh, fuck.

You know what's great? It's so great to hear a story where you're like, oh yeah, the husband. Whatever happened? Because he's just like, you want to, should we hang back a little bit? Excuse me, bitch. Move out the way.

William wrote asking for reprieve, but they didn't even respond to him. Hey. Mary's trial, if you could call it that, was on May 31st, 1660. When Endicott said she would be hanged until death, Mary responded, quote, There is no more that thou... I'm sorry, there is no more than thou that thou saidst before.

What? Hold on. What do you mean? What the fuck, okay... There's no more than thou hath thou said thou. before thou. What? Thou hath vowed the wrong van.

Say it. Thou's thou has not vanned the thou. God damn. And this is the vow I make the thou. Okay. There will be a thousand thows before a then. Can we kill her twice?

Because I... You kill me twice. You'll have another thou. Ah, fuck. Two thows. I feel like she's winning. Thou, thou, thou, thou, thou. Thou, thou, thou, thou.

I should point out my tongue has been poked with a hot spike. I'm trying to say sow. On June 1, 1660, Mary was marched the one mile from her jail to... Done this before. A tree by the frog pond in Boston Commons. And I love that. I love that. So much more rustic. I love the frog pond.

You know what is so great is to be hung while you hear the little, the little, the little frogs. There was probably a wedding taking place at that time, too. Sorry, we're just trying to get a couple pictures of the bride and groom. Oh, cracky. Thou, thou, thou, thou. It was there for a long

fucking time. Wow. Is it still there? I thought it fell down. It's still there? Holy shit. That's fucking crazy. Yeah. So can you get hung there or what's the deal? On the weekends. I mean, look, I'm not

trying to be a prick, but out of all the options, the best one. I think it was the lower one that's been cut off there. I agree. That's what I think. The circumcised branch. They were like, they were like, we should at least take that part down, right? I like to think she yanked it down with her. No.

As she walked, people in the crowd told her to go back to Rhode Island and save her life, and she yelled over the drums, quote, nay, I cannot go back to Rhode Island, for in the will, amen, in his will, will abide faithful to death. What? One more time. Word economy. No.

I love the idea of your last words being like, I won't go back to Rhode Island. Right, idiots. So her very last words were, quote, yay, I have been in paradise for several days, and now I am about to enter internal happiness. As her neck snapped, a breeze billowed her skirt, causing General Humphrey Atherton to shout, quote,

She hangs like a flag! So they didn't tie the skirt this time. Apparently not. They fucked up. So she does look like... It looked like a flag. Yeah, like there's like some resonance in that imagery. Yeah, many people in the crowd were like, oh, it's a flag woman.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, again, you have to remember they didn't have TV. So like for them, they were like, bloody hell that's important. She's a flag. She turned into a flag. The bottom half was a flag.

I'm actually reconsidering everything now. Yeah. Maybe we're not so different. The fuck off. Oh, all right. Yeah, fuck it. Let's go get pissed. Great last words, though.

Yeah. So the monarchy had been restored in England three days before her hanging. That's Charles II. So Charles 2nd is the king, and in 1661, Edward Burrow had an audience with the king and told Charles of the Quaker persecutions in Boston,

and he described Mary's two trips to the hanging tree. And on September 9th, 1661, the king issued a royal mandate commanding authorities to withhold punishment of Quakers, and instead to, quote, send the persons over unto our kingdom of England for disposition of their cases. So get sent to England for trial. Yeah, stop killing them.

I'll just send them back, you fucking assholes. In November, after reading the royal mandate, Governor Endicott agreed there would be no more hangings. This spared the life of a Quaker who was to be hung the next day. He also released all Quakers from jail. but they weren't done being horrible to Quakers. The cruel cart and whip act of 1661 was enforced by Endicott's, until Endicott's death in 1665. At the time in Rhode Island, the experiment of religious liberty took off, Rhode Island.

Not you guys in Boston. We fucking started it. In 1663, King Charles signed off. on the Rhode Island Charter, the Charter declared that, quote, no person within the colony at any time hereafter shall be in any wise, molested, punished, disquieted, or called into question for any difference in opinion in matters of religion, which do not actually disturb the peace of the colony. Wow.

And you are the ones cheering for no kings. The Charter is... One king. Can we do one? One king. Let's see one. One king. Thank you.

One demented king. Yeah. Let's see how it goes. The throne won't flush. The charter was the first document in America to grant freedom of religion. Weird how we act like we did that, not England, but whatever. Fuck me. That's it.

We lost. Loaded. Hope you're happy. Well, you talk, you like the Quakers, obviously. You've often talked about the Quakers. They started out fucking nuts. Yeah, but they found it. They always start out nuts.

It's like listening to a band's first album. It's like they'll let them find it, you know. There is going to have to become this level of leaving individualism for community because at this point we are so fucked that the greater good feel like the eye that it's so foreign to us. That's why I like I love her last word so much because you are. you're like, yeah, that is such a great way to look at it. Like, fuck you, I'm out of here, I'll be happier because your system sucks, and if you're willing to lay it all out there for that.

And it's not like, it's not anyone's fault. It's not wrong to be like, I'm not going to fucking, you know, die for this shit, but it is so different. And our history is just scattered with stories where you just go, yeah, you have to be able to be like, motherfucker, fuck you, fuck your bullshit, I'm done with it, and I'll die for it. And that really is, you know, And we just keep watching the amplification of this, you know, system now where you just go,

what else are you going to take? And then they're just like, we'll take more. Fuck you. What are you going to do? At some point, I know you and I disagree. I have no idea what you're talking about. At some point, it will happen. And it will be.

At some point, we'll take it harder. Source is the live trials and execution of Mary Dyer an account by Douglas O'Linder. and famous trials.com, Mary Dyer, the Quaker, martyr by Horatio Rogers. That seems like a good way to end the show. Thank you very much, everybody. Thanks coming out. I appreciate it.

Love you, I mean it. Thank you. Let's talk about when you can see my movie or come and see me do stand-up in the next couple months. This is exciting. So go to gareth-Ronalds.com for ticket links and all that to all this stuff. Just scroll down if you want to see my film,

Give It Up, and just stay on the tour dates part if you want to see my stand-up. Let's start with Give It Up the film. If you want to see it, you can see it all. August 10th in San Diego, Santa Fe, New Mexico, August 12th, Denver, August 13th, Chicago, August 20th, New York City, August 23rd, Philly the 24th, Raleigh, August 25th, August 26th, Atlanta, and then if you'd like to see me do stand-up, August 13th, 14th, 15th, I'll be in Fort Collins, Colorado at the Comedy Fort. And then in September, you can go see me at the Syracuse Funny Bone on September 17th, Vermont Comedy Club, September 18th, and 19th. Albany on September 20th, East Providence, Rhode Island, September 22nd, Stanford, Connecticut, September 24th, New York, New York, September 25th, Springfield, Massachusetts,

September 26th, Boston, September 27th, and then more dates coming soon. So go to Gareth Reynolds.com for tickets and information to all this stuff. Come check my movie out, give it up, and come see me on the road, Gareth Reynolds.com. Love you, dollheads.