The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 80 - The Past Times with Dorian Debose

Episode Date: June 28, 2024

Dave Anthony picks a newspaper from a day in history and reads it to co-host Gareth Reynolds. This week they are once again joined by comedian Billy Wayne Davis Redbubble Merch

And we're brought to you by Airbnb Canada. Listen, I'm on the road a tremendous amount all the time. My life is travel and I always go with Airbnb if I can just because you get a better experience. And my mother was in town recently and I ended up booking her an Airbnb instead of a hotel and she just had hip surgery. So I had to find a place that was very accommodating to her needs and found a place that she still talks about to this day. You know, like I've said before, I always like a home over a hotel. I call it a home tell. No, I don't. But I really like it. And she, like I said, she really, really appreciated it.

But recently I was wondering, like, while I'm gone, what about my place? Can my place pay in Airbnb? And the answer is yes. It can be as easy as putting your place up and then having a little more scratch generated from someone staying at my place while I'm on the road. So whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or something more fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. All right, everybody. Welcome to the Past Times podcast. Each week we go through an old newspaper from a random date in history picked out by Dave Anthony.

I'm Gareth Reynolds, and I've never seen it before, and neither is our guest this week. Dorian DeBose. Hi, Dorian. Thanks for joining us. Hey, Gareth and Dave. How are we all? We're great. We're great.

True. We're really great. Lovely. Before we start, I want to thank you for joining us. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team.

We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. We're a great team. Hi, Dorian. Thanks for joining us. Hey, Gareth. Hey, Dave. How are we all? Hello. We're good. True. We're great.

We're really great. Lovely. Before we start, Dorian, people can follow you on Instagram, Verboast Deboast. Yeah, I'll be talking. Because you're a chatty Deboast. Yeah. Yeah, that's one of my favorite things to do is just real gabber. You're pretty good at it.

I met you in Kansas City, but you live in New York now right next to a train. So there's a chance we'll hear a train go by. Yeah, if lucky and the M is running on time, you will hear five, six, maybe even seven. Is your audience a train audience? Okay, I think that's something to look forward to. They're actually not. Oh, I thought they were. But we're looking to expand.

No, we're very eager to expand in the train world. Yeah. So that's why this is a get. This will be great if we can get those. We want train spotters. We want trains. No, this is the train. They're they're loyal train train people.

They are. They are. The train people show up. They're they're hard core voters. You're just saying you have a complicated relationship. Yeah. Diego. So number one, fuck the charges. I'm glad that they left. But number two, I...

We're getting trained people, but we're losing the San Diego beach. In college, I fell in love with three different girls who were all from San Diego, just independently of each other. How? Just meeting them in person? Yeah, I mean, you ever see the movie Five in a Day the Summer? It set up like a manic pixie dream girl. It was all women from San Diego.

I never even told any of them. Yeah, I think that's, the follow-up is. Yeah, okay. It kind of makes it hard. Yeah, it's not, that's not, so they didn't reject you as much as they just had no idea. Concept. Do you want to, are you in a relationship right now?

Do you want to float out any of who they are and see if we can spark something? I think two of them are married and one of them is like gay. So none of those are obstacles. None of those are obstacles. Those are easy. Those are easy. Yeah. All right, Dorian, well, we start off, we'll guess what year this paper's from.

Since it's my show, I'll start and then you get a chance. Also, we've had papers from the 1600s. At some point, Dave's gonna drop like a 1981. I know that's gonna happen. That's right. You hear that train people? There it is! We do it both for you. I'm going to guess that this one. Do you want to do you want a headline? OK, give us a headline. Sure. Give us a teaser. Not that this helps. Romanians sentenced to jail for life.

Mm hmm. Nothing for me. God means all Romanians. Many of us all Romanians. You guys don't remember that? All Romanians? Well you would either flee or you'd stay there and those are called the Romanians. I'm gonna...

Shut up Dave. I'm gonna guess... That does very little for me. I'll guess 1919 is gonna be my guess. Can I have two guesses? What the fuck? 1919 is going to be my guess. Can I have two guesses? What the fuck? I'm sorry. Yeah. I'm asking questions. Go ahead. Yes.

I believe it's either 1907 or like 1957. OK, it's a very unorthodox, but OK. You got close to nineteen nineteen forty seven. Oh, good good work Dorian was there anything that led you to that? Yeah like I figured that that was like a Yugoslavia thing like that had to be like it's like interesting unrest happening in that area. Okay you did get two guesses so don't showboat too much No I really only needed the one I had the second guess just to make you feel

better. Well I don't understand that but but okay. All right, Dave, let's party. What do you got? Well, first of all, spectators in the court applauded when a booker's tribunal yesterday sentenced the former leader of the Romanian Peasant Party to life in prison on trees and churches. Yeah, I was just finishing that headline. So this is another Australian paper, the Canberra Times from November 13th, 1947. Okay, okay, so they're bigger than the Romanian stuff. The Romanian peasant party.

Peasant party, yeah, for peasants. They were self-identifying as peasants? Yeah, that is, yeah. I guess if you're poor. Like the working poor party, right? I mean, that's a, yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's highly, it's way more relatable today than say the Democratic or the Republican party.

So I would definitely go more in. How dare you? But you're right, there's not a lot of shine on it. Like it probably didn't get test marketed. Yeah, I mean, I personally wouldn't call my party the broke people party. Well. I would call it like the people with a little bit of money.

That's why people appeal to the middle class mostly. The middle class party would do so well. Famously, that's why both parties say they are. Yeah, it's great. They really are. If one of them said, like're for the for the broke people, people don't like it when you when you like make policies for them, but you label as a broke person policy. Fair point.

Yeah, fair point. That's true. Communist seeking to enslave world. This headline is evergreen. Never stops. Yeah, that is it. that's a perpetual headline literally I saw that posted on Instagram two days ago yeah I'm in my gifts of 2024 yeah oh my god are the police after the train for anyone listening who hasn't guessed yet Dorian the the Bushwick. It's like 30 minutes. Yeah, not too bad. It's not bad at all. The communists are making the greatest efforts of all time to enslave the peoples of the world declared General Mark Clark, the United States 6th Army

Commander and former administrator of the American zone in Austria at a speech in San Francisco. It's so weird that a general would say that. They're so usually pretty chill. No, they're normally pretty straightforward. Yeah. Yeah, pretty chill guys. No, Mark Clark. Yeah.

He added that today, only two years after the successful termination of our long, hard fight against Nazism and fascism, we are face to face within insidious propaganda and infiltration of yet another civil ideology, communism. It's shocking how quickly they moved off of the Nazis. I feel like there's enough fuel to run on, hey, worry about the Nazis for like,

I mean, it was fucking crazy. Not like all those like fled to Argentina. You're like arresting all the Romanians and America. Yeah, a lot of side America. We took like a lot of sick motherfuckers. How do we get to space? Yeah, we live a lot of family here to help us improve the water filtration. You're moving to Cape Canaveral or you're going to the gulags.

Yeah. Whatever that just just. Yeah. Yeah. And we still fear it. I mean, you would just imagine it. This at some point, people would be like, look, the calls are coming from inside the house. Yeah.

So it's just like how's always the prowler. It's just like how often, because we have it here in our school board. You're screaming about communist and it's like, how bad the things have to get here in capitalist America before you realize maybe there's a problem. What do you actually think? Because my guess is that never.

My guess is that never a you know Joe Biden could be stabbing someone with a sword and they'd be like we can't have Trump. They would be They would be eating people and blaming communism It's like Chris like the fact once is down like the school board level. It's like over man, like yeah No one that one on what's the school board doing it's like over that like yeah the one that one what's the school board doing to lay no nothing there's absolutely not it's all made up like it's all made up all everything they scream about in school board meetings is totally made up you give one kid like a free lunch and everybody's coming up with hammers yes a rest of the hotel striker this is a Yes, it's true.

Arrest of Hotel Stryker. This is out of London. Stryker? Stryker. This is out of London. Okay. Okay, yeah. It clarifies what kind of Stryker.

Is there a train? Am I the only person here in trains? Do other people have trains? Yeah, you're now fantasizing about the trains. There hasn't been a train in here. Police have arrested a Savoy hotel striker and charged him with assaulting the police, using insulting words and insulting behavior. See, that's come on.

That doesn't that doesn't tell us what he did yet. Like, I don't think he did anything. That's the problem. What did he is he striking against the hotelers or hitting people? Oh, because if he's hitting right, it's a problem. True. He's probably not hitting anybody. I's a problem. True, yes. He's probably not hitting anybody. I bet he's on strike.

He's like, fuck this place. And the cop's like, get out of here. Yeah. He's like, fuck you too. And they're like, that's actually a very illegal for you what you just did. Yeah. That's actually communism to tell him to tell us fuck you.

Yeah. Clashes between strike pickets and the police occurred outside the hotel last night when the strikers tried to prevent two lorries delivering oil. After a union organizer's example of trowing himself in... It must be throwing, right? Throwing himself in front of one lorry had been limited by other pickets, the lorry drivers agreed to take the oil back with them. So that's why he got arrested because they was a successful.

And it's also like when you watch what's going on now, like with Just Stop Oil, there's places like that. Like it's like they're doing so much more coordinated shit and the trucks like run over them. But back then they were like, we should turn around. This is crazy. A man there. No, it's like a lot of the thoughts on like this kind of

protest have like changed so much. I was like back then at a minimum, your fellow person, like the other person like across me was like, all right, you might be being a bit annoying to me, but ultimately I understand what you're doing. Whereas like now they're just like, all right, you're like making it so there's only one lane of traffic. What if I hit a civilian? And it's also like, I just love the way that we're just like, I won't be inconvenienced.

It's like, you're going to be so massively inconvenienced. Like I was watching the news this morning talking about the heat wave, quote unquote, and the way that they are just like, golly, this is cuckoo. Anyway, and you're just like, what the work dying. No, you're really brushing past. I remember like at one point I was like reading about all the different things that like climate change was like going to cause. I was like, all right, there's no amount of protest. I would not be okay with. Yes. I don't want like, there's like, I'm like three pages in on just like a bullet point

list of fucked up things that are going to happen. It was like, yeah, they're right. They got some points. I don't, I really, I, you know, you remember when you used to play like, like, used to play like chicken, you'd be like where you either with a guy or a girl, you'd play, you'd play gay chicken or straight chicken and you'd be like moving your hand. I would never play chicken. I would never be like, stop any, they could be like, what about if we throw oil execs into gas ridden pools and light it on fire? I'd be like, I accept.

Continue. I mean, I am like famously like a gay chicken champion, but I do understand the point. Thank you. Oh, I didn't know that they were, I didn't know they had championships, they have tournaments. It's replacing the hot dog eating competition this year because of the championships. They're doing gay chicken at Coney Island. Yeah, they should have moved it to Pride too. Although I don't know if they'd be like, that's not what we're going for. We got your back.

Gage Giga style. I'm hitting so many winners, there's not a single dog there. Bravo. He is. All right, so that guy got arrested. Okay. And we'll miss him. We'll miss him.

Are any of these guys still alive, you think? Well, it's very interesting. Well, could be, yeah. Dave wants to declare him dead. We'll miss him. Are any of these guys still alive, you think? Well, it's very interesting. No, well, could be, yeah. Dave wants to declare him dead. Yeah, I do. Okay. You'd be like, Andrew, he's dead. To me.

Yeah, he's dead to us. Anyone who fucks with the police is not a friend of mine. No, that's right. We're very cop friendly. We're pro. Everybody knows we love cops. Yeah, all cops are friends. Yep, exactly.

Yeah, all cops are friends, yeah. Food shortages to last five years! Wow, imagine when that got reported. Viscount Bruce, chairman of the World Food and Agricultural Organization, told the press that it seemed clear that the world food shortage would continue for at least four or five years. He called for further wheat saving by producer countries, adding that he had Argentina, there's so many in the spelling in this paper, had Argentina in mind when he stated that some countries were not doing as much as they could in serving at a proper distribution of feud. Fucking Argentina.

Hoarding. Always with the Argentina. What are you guys shilling? They love hoarding their wheat in Argentina. They're all the biggest wheat hoarders. Let me ask you guys a question. Where did the Nazis go? Argentina. Argentina.

Oh! That's the thing, Hitler ran a wheat-based economy. I don't know if People talk about that. That's true. That's right. That's true. That's what field most of it for five years feels like too broad of a range when we're talking.

Yeah, it's very good though. I'm all for the alarm. Like, go with the alarming one. Yeah, party. Go with these. Let's get some of those scary headlines back out there. Yeah. Like, tell us five and five years.

I understand why. But like within the article, you like it could last for four years. It could last for that's a long time to not have food. Yes, this really is for sure. Yeah. He added that the organization would be more effective if Russia could be persuaded to accept membership. The council adopted a report which declared that food shortages demand in the I can't read that word. Okay. Doesn't matter where the sentence is over. I just added in sentence and that's the end of the article. Okay, so yeah, so we're just

looking at unless Russia steps up we're all gonna be without. The rush is dealing with the rushes deal with their own share. They just lost millions of people. Like the rows of that dirty snake communism right now. That's right. That's right. This is the peak Stalin era. Yeah. Yeah. This is the era where like what's happening now.

They'd be like Photoshopping and look like abs. And a panther on a panther around his shoulders. Yeah, sorry. Go ahead. I just seem like you needed an ending and penis. Oh, go ahead. British constable killed at Haifa. Jerusalem.

Oh, it's not. Now here we go. Well, he was in the wrong place to be going like, all right, all right, all right. What's going on here? Just shoot a rocket through him. They've been killing people there since. Well, never mind.

Terror shot a British constable and seriously injured three others while they were drinking in a cafe in the street in Of course, it's fun that literally nothing has like changed and how the media reports Honestly, this one is this paper is alarmingly similar to what is happening now I mean, it's just most of the stuff you like. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yep Probably the difference for their influence. Yeah, right here is being that the terrorist in this story is Jewish I Think so, I think so. Well, I on behalf of the show we're trying it

This is we're toeing a line here. I think that's what they're saying. We're getting the train people, but we're losing a lot of demos people but we're losing a lot of demos. A Rome message stated that 1,000 Jewish men women and children embarked without visas for Palestine from a small village near Venice. Two Jewish girls and a Jewish youth were killed and two others injured during a gun battle with British troops. Dave, is it just me or should Jewish youths be called Jews? Do you want to put a pin in that until after the article or when should we? No, I mean, it's like you should start doing podcasts called Combining Words.

I am doing one. Two Jewish girls and a Jewish youth were killed, and two others were injured during a gun battle with British troops. The battle occurred when the troops surrounded a building on the coast believed to have been occupied by Ergenzwewaal, Louemi, military officials and Tel Aviv announced that 10 Jews were

captured in another building. People don't realize why that the well, they were trying to take over. They were trying to take the land. Well, yeah, I know it was a period of time to like, like they were just like coming in and like taking land. But like, yeah, they fought the British. I mean, they fought the British to get land basically. Yeah. Well, they just like name a guy. Like they give a guy his full name.

Oh, that guy. Yeah. I would imagine that at this point, everybody knows who, you know, he's like, if you said like, uh, whatever. Marjorie Taylor Greene. Yeah. I mean, in history, you wouldn't know who Marjorie Taylor Greene is, but now it'd be like, yeah, fucking asshole. God, I hope that's true. God, I hope that's true. No one's gonna, she's one of those names like,

cause it'll be overshadowed by like, like do you remember who, like no one knows who the little person was in congress person or whatever in Germany, but like it'll be over, totally overpowered by whatever comes. But we know that they hang them with floss. As they should. As they should have.

Yeah, so whatever comes, like people don't remember those little names. That's good. Nobody, like it's been like two years and nobody remembers like Madison Cawthorne. God, boy, did he have he had a hell of a run though. He was right about the congressional sex parties. I think he was telling the truth. Yeah, that was a good one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I thought that they I think they because the racism was like bad. But like I think they actually put him out of Congress because he was like also the sex parties are weird. It was like, Whoa, dude. Yeah, I'm sure, Whoa, dude. Yes. So without question, I would love to just, just to,

just to dip in there for 15 seconds to be like, Oh my God. Is he, he was in the wheelchair. Yeah. He was in the wheelchair. I wonder if he was non-functioning down there. And like, so he was like a guy who couldn't and then got mad at the sex parties. I believed him to be functioning. Really? Yeah, because there was some pictures that came out. It's not just your fantasy. There were some pictures that came out that looked like he was really romping around with another gentleman. Oh really? A gentleman? I thought that was like before like because he was like paralyzed later in life. Oh, maybe it was before. That's a shame. When you say gentlemen, did the guy have a top hat on?

No, no, no. That's true. And I know what business man. Yeah, it's true. Yeah. Well, that's like you dress like a racist from North Carolina, which is what he was. But yeah, true. Fair.

True. Fair. Personally, I think if congress was having sex parties it'd be more one of the more relatable things they do yeah i would just love to see it i would just love to i because you just know that there's a lot of ass eating and b not a long party lines or maybe it is maybe but it is still a hierarchy like everyone will have to line up and eat Plus he's ass

Boy, I'll tell you what lunch is off my menu Lunch just went bye bye She's imagining I'd be like, oh, it's a lot of 34 people behind below the So is that your name? Just the red. I'm like the gambling. Yeah.

Man awarded two thousand six hundred fifty eight pounds for loss of arm. Wow. That's not a lot. That's not a lot of money. I got sold it early on that. Fifty eight. Yeah. So not a lot of money. I got sold it early on that. 58, yeah. So whatever. That's not a lot of money for an arm. Four grand.

They got like, yeah. $400 for an arm? It's like four grand back in the 40s. That's what it, that's gotta be like 30 grand now. That's nice. That's a nice chunk of change. Worth it. That's a nice chunk.

How much would you sell your arm for right now? Oh, fuck. Throw a number out there, but it can't be like- 30,000. How much? 30,000. No, no, no, dude. 50,000.

No, no, no. 50,000. No, on arm. You got to go. We're talking. So you acknowledge this guy got patent peanuts for that arm. Yeah. Why, are you a fucking lawyer?

Yes. Yes. it's bullshit. I want to do it. What the record reflect my client is. Oh, for fuck's sake. This is out of Sydney. When a postal truck hit a panel van, he was driving Frederick Thomas Duke Ice vendor of Tweed heads. Tweed heads. He's from a place called tweed heads.

I slender tweed and I spend her from tweed heads. It's very Australian. That's a, that's a, that all sounds very fake to me. Yes. Right. Yeah. Most stuff in Australia. When you're there, you're like, what?

And they're like, well, he's the gimbit salesman from Wacken. You can't go out and then night, there's a dinghy. It was like, what? What do you mean? It's a fake animal. It's true. And then you see them and you're like, you weren't making these things up? Well, that was something we covered on the dollop once was like the first guy who

found a platypus was like, this is not real. He was like checking it for stitching. He was like, it's fake. Yeah, there's no way. Who put the beak on this? Someone beavered a duck. He had his right arm severed above the elbow. Duke said in the sub... That's making it a little more interesting too. So we got a half action. Okay. That just stunk. So you're losing like just the top half of your arm.

Yeah. $50,000? Back in the table. I would say best part. I would say best part of your arm. It's a key part for sure. Well, if I had to pick, I would definitely say remove the middle part and then just reattach and, you know, give me T-Rex arm. But that's the best option. We're talking about an accident. This is an act of God and 50 grand, you know, I'm, hey, I'm not going away. Okay. You're not going away. You're going away. Do the, do the tiny arm.

What do you mean do it? No, let me see it. Let me see it. No, I'm not doing it. Um, we are making that deal. Well, so is that what happened to Norris Barkley? He, uh, with his, what do you mean?s Barkley? He with his. What do you mean?

He has he has tiny arms. Now, I thought he would just go like that. What do you mean, CeeLo? Yeah, yeah, I think CeeLo's just built like that. Yeah, CeeLo is just yeah, CeeLo is just a toddler boy. He was the toddler became a man. It seems like they cut off a part and put his hand up top. Also, some very puzzling tweets. He's not, turns out not a good guy.

No. I mean, he's just positing the question if a woman is passed out next to you and you finger her, did it make a sound? Which I think is a Zen Buddhist conundrum. Let's just, it's great how many people are rapists now. Sure. Just saying it.

Now? Yeah, now. Now is not the right word. But just like out and like, yeah, no, I'm still working. I'll do a concert. By the way, I'm a rapist. Tweeting it's interesting. Tweeting it's interesting.

I saw Andrew Tate just straight up tweeted the N word like twice yesterday. And like, like the, like people who were like, like, like buddy, buddy with him were like, Andrew, what is like, don't be stupid. Hold on, Andrew. I thought I knew you. I thought I, Andrew, this is not like he was like, buddy, this is this is all him. I heard him talk for the first time like two

weeks ago and it was shocking a because of what he said and b because of how he said I was like this is your guru that's your guy this is you could do better I'm always shocked when a rapist turns out to be a racist also it's very yeah look a lane honestly take a letter I know or just I'm not a fan of the You're on. I don't even know what you're seriously is like a like alpha male influencer because he's got a weak ass chin. He does. Well, it's like double D from Ed and Eddie. I'm not buying that. Oh, just the taste. Well, the looking. Yeah, it's crazy. Like I always said this about comedy, like

the dumb people need comedy, too. So people would always get mad at shitty comedians or whatever. I'd be like, yeah, but the dummies need it. And that's what, that's what, that's what Andrew Tate is. He's for dumb people. Yeah. Yeah. He's a bargain bin guru.

Yeah. So Duke- We need sock hops back for the dumb people. Yeah. It's true. Well, interesting. Duke said at a Supreme Court today where he sued the Commonwealth claiming the accident

was due to the truck driver's negligence that he got a surprise when he looked down and found his arm had been cut off. Wow. It's one of those. I mean, it is surprising. It's gotta be crazy. But I remember learning that there were times

where someone would lose an arm and not know right away and that blew my mind as a kid. I was like, what the fuck? Because that's the way you want to find out is going like, now I are, you know, it'll be like, whoa, that was fucking close. Oh no. No. Yeah.

Who's is that? Who's is that? Who's arm is that? Who is arm is that? Why did they steal my class ring? God, this is a lot of blood. Somebody needs help. We got to call 911. I'll do it.

Oh, no. Calling the ambulance, but not for me. Oh, it is for me. Oh, God. The driver of the truck was Robert Duncan, who said he also had a shock when he saw Duke's arm dropped from the side of the vehicle. We were both very surprised. We were both really, that was crazy. Buddy, if you think you're having a bad day, I just cut off some guys' arms.

Yeah, mine! Oh, whoa! Whoa! Yeah, I mean, that's definitely, that's shocking. Whoa. Yeah. I mean, that's definitely shocking. I wouldn't point it out either. It's like he was like, that was crazy. I'd be like, that was all crazy.

Anyway, I don't know. Let's just get out of here independently. I'll go. Yeah, well, you should you should figure out who did this. But I'm at work right now. We're not going to leave till we find out who did that or whose arm that is. Oh, it's a hundred and thirty thousand. It's a hundred and thirty thousand pounds today. Well, a hundred and thirty thousand pounds today.

So we're talking hundred and fifty thousand dollars. No, my is the UK's crash left arm mid forearm Yeah, what would you what are you doing it? Like left arm like right here, but yeah Give me you in like a yeah. Okay. Let's get it. Go fund me Your high your eyes bitter on Patreon. Can have my left foot as well. Wow.

Wow. The foot is flitterous. That's awesome. You're a good guy. I mean, if you lose the foot, then you're just buying a new foot, right? A bionic whatever. Hey, quit talking about it. We got a winner here.

This is going to help our page. How much? That's got to cost at least 100 grand. I don't think my left foot's worked yet. I don't know how fucked up either. They're not special. I'd love to have a look. I'd love to have one on my desk as a book weight. I'm all late. It's very windy where I am.

I'm doing book weights. Wow, it just got very awesome. And we're brought to you by AirBnB Canada. Listen, I'm on the road a tremendous amount all the time. My life is travel and I always go with Airbnb if I can just because you get a better experience. And my mother was in town recently and I ended up booking her an Airbnb instead of a hotel and she just had hip surgery. So I had to find a place that was very accommodating to her needs and found a place that she still

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some bills or something more fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. Yeah. Penis. Grease insists on heads of bandits. On what? Greece insists on heads of bandits. I love how the Greeks, I've always enjoyed the Greeks.

Yeah. Bring the heads. When a price is put on the head of a bandit or gorilla, it is customary for the head to be severed and brought in for the reward. I like that. We got a proof. You can't just say I caught a head. Yeah, you can't just bring in an ID or the body. You could just bring in the body, but I guess it's a lot to drag

or you could bring in. It's heavy. There is bandits are eating well, and that's the problem. I mean, yeah, that's right. You should be able to bring in a part of the head. I don't like what you're doing. We should scalp the bandits. I don't want to hear you're too lazy to bring the whole head. How about the nose and ears? I don't want to carry it. Like it's. You can't misinterpret it. Yeah. That's not good.

That's way worse. That's weird. It feels insane. Just take the head. Put it in your knapsack and yes, bring the whole head. What about popping the eyes out? Why? Now you're just doing weird shit. You know a bag of eyes and you bring those in and the guy's like, why are there? Eyes and penis of the bandits. Yeah, no, no, we just need the head. Oh, man.

Well, I left the rest of the head. I figured. All right here. I got a bag of dicks. Eyes and penis. Whose dicks are they? We don't know what their dicks look like. Oh man. Well one's not mine. I don't know why you'd say that.

Nobody said that. It's not. Oh my God. I just need the money. We know. I can't make rent. You brought in one dick no handed. It's we know. I can't make rent. You brought in one dick, no hand, and it's clearly yours. Ah, fuck.

Jesus, you idiot. Come on, just can I have something? You spent dollars for being weird. That's not enough. It's my dick. Well, you didn't rate the rules. I got the guy's dick. I didn't.

What? The stings are getting far more bizarre. It sprays like a shower. Oh, what does your dick stop? Go. It's $15 to leave. We're just looking for the heads of the bandits. So 20 sure.

Go. Honestly, just get out of here. $1,000. No, you're just being that guy. Leave. We got to do. We had a pile of back. If I come back with a bag, by the way,'re just being that guy. Leave. We got to do we got a pile of heads here. If I come back, if I come back with a bag, by the way, don't leave that here.

Yeah. How was work, honey? I could. Oh, the negotiations did not go well. Yeah, we looked at a lot on posters. I brought in a head of bandit in some sense. Sort of, well, huh. They should have said what bandits. These guys, they're just ripoff artists.

This was admitted by the Minister for Public Order commenting on the publication in London of pictures showing severed heads being carried through Greek villages and on London reports of atrocities by Greek government forces. You just got to rob the guy. You just let that guy get real. This is what I would do. Hang out of the bushes of the head return facility two miles away and then just rob the head guy. Take the heads.

Take the head. Just be like, nice work, dickhead. And then just like stab him and just be like, Hey, here's 30 heads. How do you know the heads? Yeah, it could be worrying. How do you know the heads are? It's true. It's true too. It's just a head. The government did an atrocity and they were bandits and we have their heads. Well, but I'm assuming you've got some picture of some kind to be like, that's him. But I always think that when you're in the airport, TSA takes a real quick, I don't think they're ever like, that's not you.

They're doing like a 1947 Photoshop of a bandana on this guy. Yeah, that's right, that's the movie. The severed head makeover looks just like him. The only real way to tell if it's the right person is you have their dick in a bag. We've moved very far away from your initial pitch for a reason. So do not bring us back to where you were going before. Nobody's cosigning your bag of dicks. I would like the option.

Now, thank you, sir. Dorian selling his arm and foot for one thirty. Yeah, but he's for your audience. Yeah, I'm not. I like it for us, but it's bad decision making. Your Patreon. Think about the fucking ride you can buy with that, though. He's going to have like a sweet, sweet ride.

It ain't going to be a stick. Dude, it's going to be so fun driving a car in New York City. Yeah. Just top down arm off. Not able to hit the gas. Yeah, just honestly. Yeah. It's my left foot. I'll be good. Yeah. And it's my left foot. I'll be good. OK, all right.

All right. All right. All right. The minister said the government would investigate charges of atrocities and any regular and any regular troops found guilty would be drastically dealt with. I mean, no, you're not. They're not going to.

They I'm just going to say right out. They didn't investigate the trots. I like it. Yeah. I wonder how they put both sides on it. England does not investigate atrocities or they just don't. That is so, what a horrible thing to say about a wonderful- They do them.

Oh, good Lord. Dory. Name a thousand things England has done wrong. Yeah. Right now, name 60 countries they've taken things from. I will give you one minute, say a million things about England that are incorrect. Starts now. I'm waiting.

Result of a wrong waiting? Claim for £1,000 dismissed by Supreme Court jury. Okay. This is Sydney again. A Supreme Court jury today rejected a claim for £1,000 damages by Robert Watson, 40 against a Broadway hotel keeper. Wow. This went all the way to the Supreme Court, which you probably didn't think down.

Yeah, there was nothing to do down there. Yeah, when you were just complaining like the sheets, you're like, mother, I'm going to the Supreme Court tomorrow. This is crazy. Watch the legis. Happy to be there. Yeah. Sure. Watch the legis swallow a piece of glass from unsound tumbler while drinking at the bar of the West Minister Hotel last year. Okay. I piece of glass. Yeah.

It was probably in the ice. I do think he swallowed a piece of glass. I do think I do too. I do too. I had some. It's his fault. I was very Australian. Yeah.

I'll have a tumbler of glass place. Crack it is glass in here. Ernest James- Whiskey on the rocks, please. Not ice. No ice. Ah, I see what you did. Ernest James Coyle licensee denied the tumbler was unsafe and this was accepted by the jury. Watson denied he had coughed and bitten a piece out of the glass. Oh, so wow, this guy might've just been a psycho genius. He just had one too many rungs and that was just like,

I think I'll make a living by biting the glass off. He said, and there was very clearly a bite taken out of the glass with his teeth marks. He's chewing. He's David Blaine-ing in the bar. His mouth is like fucking bleeding. He's like, I think there's a little bit. He's like, yeah, you'll beat the fucking...

We all saw you bite. You've got to bite it in real privacy. But there's a little bit of glass. And if you do that, that is, there's no... It's definitely not premeditated. He was drunk and then decided to do it. Because if you were like, I've been working on this new plan that I'm hatching, you bring in a piece of glass and you do actually swallow it.

But if he bit the glass, it's very Australian. It's so Australian. It's got to have, to prove it's from the glass, you have to bite it so it looks like it came from the glass, right? Dude, what, he does? I feel like no, he doesn't, what do you mean? He's not just saying there was a chip of glass in the drink, he's saying it came from the glass.

Oh, he is, okay, that's hard to explain. So that's why, yeah, I think that's why, but that's one of the things where the jury just looks at him and goes, yeah, that guy is squirrely looking. No. Yeah. He's he keeps winking at us. Yeah. Very Australian thing to do. Yeah. Yeah. The audience can't. This is like an old audio podcast, right? Well, they'll put the video on Patreon Patreon along with your go fund me link.

All right. Thank you. Thank you. I want them to know we all went. Yeah, we all went. If you're listening, I think the audio will pick that up. Yeah, we all went. We're all still winking into our mics.

It's loud as fuck right now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah. Loud Blake. Man killed after quarrel in hut. Wow. Oh, what? This is out of Walagon. Walagon? There you go.

Walagon? Where's that? Dave? West Coast. What? West side. It's near Sydney. It looks like it might be kind of in Sydney. It's a nice beach. I'll tell you that right now.

Oh, yeah. We're going to go to Wollongong. No, it's not near Sydney. Yeah, it's south of Sydney. Yeah, south of Sydney. Yeah, we get into a little quorum. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Settle some hut beef.

By the way, hut beef's a great restaurant there. What? Go ahead. Hut beef. Attack with a large butcher's... Boy, this is a word I'm definitely not going to... Knife by a man with, it's like many letters long and there's so many opportunities for me to fuck it up.

So we're just gonna pass. Okay. By a man with whom he shared a hut. A man picked up an ax, struck his attacker on the head, killing. Okay. Okay, so a guy came in with this knife that sounds like it was some sort of native

apparatus. And then a guy that was the conversation killed them. Yeah. The guy pulled out the axe that guy does. That's not a nice. And he goes, no, it's an axe. We've heard it before. You can't bring a knife to that. It's why. Nope. No, no, absolutely not. This was alleged in the long on court today when Michael Kelly, 58 labor was charged with having murdered George Underwood. Forty eight. Kelly appeared in court on a stupefied condition and lurched when the charge was read to him.

And yeah, you're right. Fifty eight, you got it. Fifty eight and 40, I thought this was a young man's crime. It is. It's also, were they roommates? I don't know. Seemed like they were kind of roomies. Detective Sergeant Debney said it was alleged the two men had an argument and Underwood picked up a knife with which he threatened Kelly.

In the struggle that followed, Kelly is alleged to have grabbed an ax and struck Underwood on the head. Underwood, after calling at a house in Port Kembla, was rushed to hospital where he died early today. It's shocking that he even made it to the hospital. I think if you put an axe into someone, I imagine that that's an ender.

Well, maybe a half-hearted axe swing. Maybe. Don't make me do this. Sure. It's not like even then. If you're a half-heartedly sling an axe at a guy. I know. That's how I feel.

I feel like it's like it's even a half-hearted axe axe strike is still I'm like, that's the end of that. Yeah, I think it was an accident a little bit, that's kind of like over. I don't want to come back if I get acts like that, I'm like this and bush more and this isn't going to be a life. That's not a life. This is a lot. I won't keep it after you got hit with an ax once in the head. You're going to be different.

Maybe there's a glancing blow glancing kill. It's over. Stop. And then he bled out. Well, from what? I don't know. But here's the dicks. Just give me some money.

No, it's not what we're doing. Give me a money. No, it's not what we're doing. Give me a little bit. You guys, I'm going to try to bribe the jury with a bag of dicks. So for everyone that killed my roommate, others are saying use 20 bags of dicks. So counterpoint is a black bag of peckers. Your honor, may I present my bag of dicks to the jury?

Your Honor, I am clearly quite guilty, but I would like to present this Vons bag full of cocks. Why do you have that? Well, don't worry, they were all bandits. Because I was misled by the bandit council. The bandit council says they cannot pay me out, and for separate reasons I killed my roommate. Okay. Your Honor, did they specify which head? No!

What are you talking about? The King's head! Focus on the case, Jesus Christ. Stop. Nobody said which head! Everyone assumed you knew. This is the exact argument that made him kill that guy. Yeah. Finally we know.

Uh. Dormen House Guests Refute Ministers Denial. Okay. Statements by the minister for the interior, Mr. Johnson, on recent incidents at Gorman House were challenged last night by the president of the House Committee. Miss Paul said that the manager, manager,

s manager, s had admitted that the staff drinking party had been a very poor show and then it would not happen again. So the staff got a little crazy. It's that got ripped. I like how much is left unsaid in the articles. Yeah, it's a very insinuating article. Why is that even in the paper? Just like, I mean, they must have gone off.

If Australians are saying there was too much drinking, it must have been crazy. Crazy. Did y'all see that story last year where this woman was saying that there was a Taco Bell sex party, but she wasn't invited to because she was her employee? What?

Yeah, yeah. Taco Bell sex party. It was called the TV bagger. They were closed the Taco Bell early and had a sex party. Yeah. It's so good. Fucking with the Banes is what that's called. Doesn't surprise me.

It's awesome. I'm for that, by the way. Yes. If Taco Bell, if I pulled up to Taco Bell and they were closed and the sign was like, it's a sex romp, I'd be like, there's another one there. I'll let them have it. That's fair. They used to show up to talk about like 11 and they're supposed to be closed at like 12 and it would be closed already.

But as long as you're having a sex party, this is fine. Yeah. I actually think I've been to Taco Bell drive throughs that are supposed to be open still and just aren't. And you're like, yeah, whatever. I'll live. It's Taco Bell. There's like 12 of them and like the next block.

Yeah, that's true. In a statement to the camera times last night, Miss Paul said that the issue arising from the recent publicity given Gorman House appeared to have been misconstrued by a section of the community far from having acts to grind as Mr. McVeigh's put it. Grind callback. Here we go. The guests have always been willing to help the management in any trouble confronting her, as was instanced during her previous management in the latter part of 1946,

when the majority of the staff walked out on her as the bell rang for lunch. Oh, I like the... They might have just been going to lunch, by the way. They're putting it on a woman. They're all, they're... Well... The drinking party. Okay, so it's the manager-ess.

Yeah. Manager-ess. Lady manager. This is when a woman couldn't just be a manager. She ought to be a manager-ess. Manager-ess. Supervisor-ess. Yeah.

The guests tided her over with, sorry, the guests tided her over the difficulty of serving themselves, washing up, et cetera. We feel that sympathetic consideration should be given any requests made and some action taken to eliminate faults pointing to the management. But Miss Barlow appeared reluctant to shoulder any responsibility or assume any control over staff.

What what happened at this party? I don't know. They just really want to clarify. Yeah. The case of Miss Hines and that of the drinking party held by a member of the staff and attended by both men and women. Ooh, yeah. So country, I love it. They will not say what happened, but they were very gossipy. Yeah, yeah.

Minute women were at a drinking party. Yeah, both genders and You get the hint, yes. She was women. Can I make it any more obvious? Yeah. We're just incidents in a long list of grievances, but happened to be the incidents which brought matters to a head.

Why is that the grievance? I don't know. I think- Who's complaining about the staff having a little drinking party. Yeah, there's a lot of questions. I don't understand why this is in the paper. This is my theory. I don't think Australians can read and I think they also cannot write. Okay, fair.

There are witnesses to prove that the drinking party did not finish until approximately 4 30 a.m Nice the staff room in which the party was held is in the same quarter as bedrooms of some of the guests who Next morning placed a written complaint before Miss Barlow. Oh, so there was partying and people couldn't sleep But to the staff drinking party The tea totalers being annoying and ruining partying again. By the way, I'm at the age where I'd complain.

Yeah, I'd complain too. It's old people against young people. Yeah, I would complain. I'm at the age where I'd be like, enough. I think back of all the noise I made for my neighbors around my house in college. Oh yeah. And my neighbors would be like, it is a Thursday, 2 a.m.

Yeah, but I don't have class tomorrow, bro. It was not uncommon for me to be like, well, they're banging again. People would be like, shut the fuck up. And I'd be like, man, they just don't get what cocaine is, do they? My neighbors hate it when I play the drums at 4 a.m. Yeah, they're weird.

They don't understand what it's like to be not in a band yet. They don't understand how selfish I need to be. This is what mama mentality looks like. Yeah, this is my opponent telling me. Guests arriving home at different hours of the night were accosted by members of this party. Okay. Miss Barlow is quoted as saying that vague complaints have been made from time to time, but not substantiated. These vague complaints have been in written and verbal form and have always been laid before the management as the appropriate person to deal with them.

What is that? That's like another one where you're like, uh-huh. Yeah. Okay. When asked by a guest to remedy a fault that was felt to be lowering the standards of the house, Ms. Barlow replied that it was only a third rate boarding house. In fact, she considered it a fourth rate one and that remark has been made by her on more than one occasion.

So, sure, her defense is, we are shitty. Where the fuck? Yeah, it's a shitty place. What are you talking about? What do you expect? This is a super-rate go-home. Yeah, if you want non-ORG-based staffing, go to a real hotel. That's... She's a great woman.

I love her. I love her so much. I do like that defense. Ladies and gentlemen, we are the Arby's of hotels. You are at a Red Roof Inn. We are porking. You knew what you walked into and you're not okay with it. Yeah, seriously.

How many times do I have to say this? I run a fuck party house. If you come here, there's a good chance we'll be having staff orgies. Don't be mad that you're not invited. By the way, some of you were invited and you turned your noses up at us. I totally forgot.

Then you just complained about the noise. I totally forgot that this is staff who's partying. Yeah. And suggest. And men and women. This is pure, yes, this is the staff. There are numerous inadequacies concerning food, linen, dining room, and office service, laundry facilities, cleaning facilities for rooms, et cetera, which may be traced back

to the apparent lack of interest, supervision, and proper control in the imminent change of management. Will we absolve quite a few of these? A hint to this is noose. Can we take a minute to just celebrate how fun it would be to work there? They had a great, I'm sure they had to close after this.

They had a great run. What a great job. They had like three years of like sure they had the clothes after this. They had a great run. What a great job. They have like three years of like the best job in the world. Like when you work at places where the, like you're like, don't eat here. It's a great place to work. Not yet.

When the boss is like, yeah, this is a fifth rate establishment. Yeah. That's great. Like I remember having jobs at certain like restaurants and just being like, so you will give me booze to take home. And they were like, yeah, I was like, this should not be happening, but what a great operation for me. Yeah. So they don't give you health care, but they got benefits. No. Yeah, exactly. It provided a combination of public servants, so it's it provided housing for ministers

in the in the cap. Sorry. Basically. So it's sorry. Not sorry. They're like housing diplomats and they're having sex parties at four. So good. I love it.

Give this woman a medal, dude. Yeah, she's like, we suck. Rocket trip to the moon is silly. This is a great headline. Yeah. Is that Adelaide referring to a report from London that the first rocket to the moon may be launched within the next 15 years. Sir Gare, Grant, Sir Gerrit Grant,

professor of physics at the Adelaide University, said today that if a man does succeed in reaching the moon, he will not know much about it. You just gotta love a guy who's a physicist who's just like, bullshit. Shouldn't you be like super into this idea? He's like, no. We're gonna get somebody on the moon.

Go fuck yourself. And you know what? He's gonna get up there and have no fucking clue what to do with himself. And I'm not gonna give a shit. He was right. They didn't do that shit on the moon, dude. Thank you.

Now that's actually that that does that is total waste of a trip. Fucking naked rock. And he was like, Ooh, I guess we grabbed a couple. I drove a golf cart. They put a flag up there. They hit a golf ball. And then they're like, Oh, I should brought more shit. I would have brought a football football. Football or baseball. You could hit that so far. That would have been great.

You can barely see the golf ball. Hit the fucking dingers, dude. Golf ball. Yeah, dingers. That would be great. There's so many, a frisbee, fralted up. Frisbee would be great. I wonder if a frisbee, yeah, you could, yeah.

It would go really far. Anything you're doing is pretty much the same result where you're like, bye. I think, I have no evidence for this. I'm not a physicist and I'm probably wrong. I can throw a frisbee out of orbit on the moon. Okay. Wow. Well, now we got to start with just one arm. Oh, I got, I'm keeping my right arm. I'm good. You're down a foot. You're not going to the moon, Dorian. I'm sorry. I throw it my left. I do frisbee with my left. What? Yeah, I always have. That's super weird. It's not. It's not. It is. And you shall be shamed for your oddity. He said that oxygen supplies to last out the return trip would have to be carried because

there is no air in the outer spaces. Well, what the fuck? So this guy is like, does this guy genuinely think they haven't thought of that part? Like is he like he's a physicist dumb. Like that's the thing like me as a physicist would say, I'd be like, you know, there's not a bunch of oxygen up there. So sending a man to the moon. he's like calling everybody else is fucking stupid. Yeah. That's the entire boy. They're going to bring it up there. They have to carry

the oxygen up and then use it on the way back. Well, I hope you save some room for oxygen. How is there? How is there a ship underneath the water? You know we don't breathe that. These men are going to drown. The professor said that the heat caused by the rays of the sun on the rocket wouldn't be terrific. The absence of gravitation would cause violent indigestion at least. And if a man tried to walk on the moon, he would fly about 50 feet in the air at his first. Well, I hope you've packed oxygen and roll aids because you're going to need a lot of both. Just completely incapable of like thinking they're going to play it.

Not as so negative. So they're going to the moon like it's fucking Jamaica. And then he thinks of a guy takes a step. He's just going to be like, bye. Sir, Kirsten, it's all project was sillier than looking for the North or South Poles. This guy. What the hell? Those don'tes. This guy. What the hell? So negative.

So negative. Like a horror. Like nobody stopped his statement. Nobody's like, buddy, that's not great. I got to respect a real deal hater. Yeah. Yeah. And his last name is what? Krantz, did you say? No, it's not Krantz.

It's whatever it is. It's Kerr Grant. Oh, Grant. Oh, never mind. Kerr is his first name, which already is very suspicious. It's not great. What's the name of the Kerr leader of the Labour Party in Britain, I believe? Starr. Stier. Star...

Is it? Kier, yeah, Kier Starmer. Is that his first name? Yeah. Maybe that's what this name is then. Is it... Oh. Kier?

Yeah, Kier Starmer. Yeah, let's go with Kier. Really great guy. He's a really good option. Yeah, he's really going wonders. Mobilization urged of Jewish manpower. The Jewish National Council yesterday called for the immediate mobilization of all Jewish manpower and financial resources in Palestine in Readiness for the emergency which is expected to arise with the establishment of a separate Jewish state. I don't think that's right

It was all formed in 1948 wasn't it? So this is like on the precipice of all that. So yeah It's very interesting. It worked out well. I agree. Honestly, that has a little single issue. And now one name one exactly can't. Right now. Name a million. You have one minute.

Reuter says that coupled with the call, which places Palestinians 60, 650,000 Jews on a virtual war footing. The council passed a series of resolutions strongly condemning terrorism as a danger to the establishment of a Jewish state. There were two Zionist factions and one was super into violence. I can't remember which one won. That's the pastimes will be right. Last one. Yeah. OK. Yeah.

Sure. I already did. Rocket ship is the one. Honestly, that story is so delicious. We could do it again if you wanted to. The rocket ship to the load. God, I was like, I want him to just keep talking shit about physics. He just keep breathing. You're not going to be able to breathe up.

There is the greatest point to make to the people are like, yeah. Oh, here's I'm just going to read this because it's a small ad and then we'll go to the last story. Okay. Number 13 and DDT spray is now in stock. This amazing fly spray gives lasting, lasting protection from flies, silverfish, mosquitoes,

and ants. Each insect touching it will die. That works out great. Sure does. That works out fantastic. Do you hate bugs so much you want a spray that'll make you look like them? Escape from plane on fire. Oh, this already is the movie Con Air. Gallup, New Mexico. All of the 21 passengers and crew of four escaped unhurt

when a burning American Airlines DC-4 made an emergency landing yesterday. Is this paper from today? It's like crazy how salient all this is. I know, right? A burning plane. I know. A burning plane.

A burning plane. A burning plane. A burning plane. A burning plane. A burning plane. A burning plane. A burning plane. for a minute emergency landing yesterday. Is this paper from today? It's like crazy how silly and all this is. I know, right? A burning plane. Imagine, American Air. I wanna see that. I wish there's videos of them.

You will. Oh, I will. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I don't know if you saw any of the Boeing execs yesterday. Oh my God. He certainly, you should feel good about flying for sure I think it's fun. They're doing like their press conferences while holding the sniper rifle

Guys standing with a bloody sword. Yeah. Yeah, we that's how we do We encourage anyone with any information that could be valuable to come forward right now. And he's like taking off his weathered glove, and he's just like, yeah, it's a shame that guy killed himself. Unbelievable. He seemed like he was in such a good spot mentally, too. It's so sad that he groaned at himself on his own couch.

Unreal. So rare. The pilot. You never know what people are going through. You never do. The pilot, Captain Everett Chatfield, declined to say what part of the plane caught fire, but residents said the flames were leading

from the aircraft's belly as it swooped low over the town. That's amazing. I don't know what's weirder, the fact that the pilot's like, I'm not even going to get into it, or the fact that Australians are calling the undercarriage's amazing. I don't know what's weirder, the fact that the pilot's like, I'm not even gonna get into it, or the fact that Australians are calling the undercarriage a belly. The belly. This is New Mexico.

I don't wanna talk about it. I don't wanna talk about it. Yeah, you got the belly. I still want him to be Australian. I know you do. So bad. Well, you got the belly of the plane, then you got the plane's arms,

and then right there's the snout of the beast. Look at how big his eyes are with two little men inside of him. Then he's got his wheel deck and his wheel balls. The plane is a man. That's the same physicist from the last story. That guy was like, see? Now imagine that on the moon. Well, Dorian, thank you so much for joining us. To Bose for Bose on Instagram. You're up, you're doing shows in New York fairly often, right, so people can go find where you're performing.

Like I'm all around Brooklyn usually. I run a show in Manhattan called Smolder Comedy. It's pretty sick. Another show called Copacabana also in Manhattan. Things are happening. How much time you how much time you can take off for the foot loss? Yeah. Props. I go to a couple days.

Yeah, I would definitely. Yeah. You'll be on stage with the bad guys on there in no time. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Dorian, thank you for joining us. Much appreciated. And good luck to the M-Trade. Very funny, man. Thank you.

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