The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 96 - The Egg Nog Riot

Episode Date: July 12, 2015

Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the West Point Egg Not RiotSOURCESTOUR DATESREDBUBBLE MERCHPATREON

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past but you can help rewrite their future. Donating will make sure animals are happy, healthy and ready to start their next chapter. Show us your heart so they can show you theirs forever. Visit your local global pet foods between February tenth through twenty sixth to contribute. You'll get a free take-home treat with every donation. Eat, play, love! Heeeeeeeeyyyy are listening to the Dahlup a bi-weekly American history podcast, with me Dan Anthony, each week I read a story to my freeaaaaaaard. Kara Threnals, who has no idea what the fuck is going on right now.

And he's asleep! Hahaha God, do you want to look who to do? I'll do one bottle. People say this is funny. Not Gary Gira. Steve, okay. Someone or something is tickling people.

Is it for fun? And this is not going to become a tickly quad, Kesley. Oh, yay. You are queen fakie of made-up town. All hail queen shit of Liesville! A bunch of religious virgins go to mingle. And do what? Pray.

Hi, Gary. No. This is done, my friend. Trying to pick up the energy, you know what I mean? No, it's just insane. It's an intro to a show. Someone has to pick up the energy. What's happening?

What are you doing? Dave, Dave, Dave. Yeah. What's up? Come on, man. What are we doing? I'm gonna need you to focus or something something's happened What do you mean? Well, you just know you're angry about something and nothing changed. I'm not angry about anything

All right, why don't you get off my deck January 27 wait wait? 78 no, I have dates. I have some days Sorry July 11th this Saturday. He'll be with Will Anderson and there's no this is going up next week So no you won't fuck. This is the small up, huh? No, this is this is for What day is it Tuesday, right? So when do we put them up? Oh, is it Sunday? All right, keep going do the show will on Saturday. Yeah, and then this goes up on Saturday. Well, I have another date Yeah, July 20th. I'll be a hot tub now. Go ahead. I

Made this weird. I agree. I agree. I've ruined the start of this one hot tub. Joe Mendelflur Oh Private joke for Joel Well, now it's just January 27 1778. I mean apologies won't happen. It's won't happen again leave one happening again What happened again? the Continental Army first occupied West Point to New York on that date and That is where the oldest continuously operated army post in the United States is Okay, the United States Military Academy at West Point stands atop the sea cliffs on the Hudson River 40 miles north of New York City

George Washington and Thomas Jefferson Recognize the need for a place to train young men who could defend the nation against Britain and Republican France I'm nervous 1700s already nervous. What already nervous. Why just because I feel like We're gonna hear some fucked up shit about West Point How could you think because this is how this is how it's starting. This is just a nice positive story about military No, you're not recruiting. You're a liar. It's just about a bunch of boys Maybe maybe it's a story. You're a liar five boys. You're a liar who came together through hardship and through the

Academy at West Point learned how to be men and became better people now and helped to lead our country now That's a different podcast you're describing. You don't know that. Yeah, I do Continue when it first opens it opened its doors in 1802 West Point was nothing more than a few ramshackle buildings with 10 cadets taught by three teachers Students were admitted at any point during the year and admission standards were quote little laughable. Okay So you and I could have been a West Point. Yep. We just knew a guy. Yeah, just like avid castello Follow in the Disasters War of 1812 against the British in which a largely untrained American army suffered a string of defeats against the British The British actually ate a meal at the White House after capturing Washington, D.C. Just to be pricks. Just to want. Yeah, well, what are you like?

Yeah, that's some tea. Yeah, and they sat down. Right. Would you like some compass? Yeah, it was a lot like that. Yeah You know, I think we should paint this thing blue Yay, the blue house. Fuck him. Fuck off America. Fuck you pricks. Wankers Congress didn't then we show them didn't we? Yeah, we did. Well, I'm sort of them too, but yeah Cars decided to increase funding Alden Partridge became super intended at West Point and quickly said about transforming the army recruits He drew up. I should make sure this recording. Oh, that's a good idea. Yep. So recording. I didn't have it on the thing now I got on thing We're all good. Okay. Can't wait to hear your complaints about the sound

So he became you know, he started setting shit up me he started kicking ass taking names He drew up regulations for cadets created 16 hour days Full of drills and study and adopted a gray cadet uniform. Okay A lot of people like gray, you know, blah blah the reason that gray was the uniform is because it was the cheapest Fabric, let's just be honest. Oh, that's why that's why yeah, that's what he was selling it like look at his lovely design That's why all the aren't the wooded all the army whenever the great gray is cheap. Okay, so let's not act like it's a great color Okay, what is it? It is a great people love gray. It is a gray color What but this is that's the whole idea students now followed an academic year rather than arriving whenever it pleased them

Partridge also developed standards for admission forbidding 12 year old boys married men The physically disabled and amputees We were previously admitted as cadets I'm sorry, specifically 12 year old boys Like 11 year olds could come in and 13 year olds like well for a week I think was anything anybody under 12 12 are weak. What do you wait? Get in here? It's a bridge age. It is a bridge. It's a 10 to 12 count 11's nothing. I

Love amputees, you know, I'd like to join the army Well, I've only got one But it's good as good as to Call me captain hops. They call me punter. How are you? In 1817 plapping is going to be my biggest issue here, sir. Here's me clapping All right, that's it. I can point though. I can point like a motherfucker. I'm a pointing assassin watch this look at And charge say what I mean. Hi, and then the two armors will clap and then I fall over because I only have the one thing Yes, and also my legs are fake now. Where do I sign up pointing?

In 1817 Partridge was dismissed After selling Academy wood for profit and appointing a relative to a high post So he's just kind of like he's kind of just real shady. Yeah, like what's going on with those wood? Yeah, he's like no only the best by the way, this is my brother. He's in charge I'm also selling two by fours in the parking lot He just rolls up to home depot with a Drunk full of two by fours. How are you? I'm leading America's future army now. Who wants to buy some stained wood? This is my brother. He's in charge of wood. He has no arms or legs

Partridge refused to relinquish command Well, I didn't realize that was an option. You're fired. No, I'm not. Okay. This is going unexpectedly Want to buy some wood? He was subsequently tried by court martial on numerous charges of neglect of duty and insubordination Yeah, and support. He's not leave. You can't you're fired. No, I'm not. Okay. We're gonna do this again What is he doing? How does he do that? In November 1817, he was sentenced to be cashiered Which basically is yeah, you work at a grocery store. Yeah, you have to be cashier. Yeah

Well, it's better than bagging if you're like a if you're like a ranked gentleman. It's a you they take away your Okay, smash your sword in front of you and shit like that Jesus Uh, so the president of the United States intervened and the punishment was remitted. Oh, man. He's unfireable. Yeah Alec Partridge then resigned taking his place was a superintendent at the military academy Colonel Sylvannas Thayer a former student Known as the father of West Point Thayer Revolution I both let's be honest The other guy sounds like the father of West Point. Yeah, all right. I mean, yeah You know, I mean, he's kind of the Pete Rose of West Point. He is you know what I mean?

Yeah, he sold the little wood he fucking hooked his brother up, but come on now. You're wearing gray, aren't you? You're only sleeping eight hours a day, right? You fucking bitches Thayer revolutionized the economy with his strict rules students at West Point weren't allowed to leave campus cook in their dorms or duel Demand I'll tell you the more I hear about dueling the more I miss those times like you know It was just it's a way more exciting way to live life A diet of beef bread and water prepared his young students for military rations All right boys, you're gonna start eating like shit now. All right

Ever I'm ready to get really clogged up. I get you that you're growing and everything But let's withhold stuff you need. We're gonna be fighting a war on vegetables inside of these camps His Academy was a metocracy admission and graduation were not about whether you were rich or poor Connected or unconnected, but whether you were good. Oh, this was a new idea around this time Thayer, that's interesting that that's a new idea. It is. Yeah They remade his nephew sign a letter of resignation which he kept in case he broke the rules Okay It's kind of fucked up. It's totally fucked up his nephew's like wait. Why what's happening?

mostly Thayer wanted West Point to become a respected place of learning by 1826 the Academy had 36 men Serving as faculty and staff with four official departments mathematics engineering natural philosophy and military tactics Instruction was also provided in French drawing law history and chemistry Thayer's learning Thayer's system was based on sections where cadets would be promoted to a more difficult class or demoted to a lower class Depending on their performance. Okay, so he really just did what made sense. He was just logical Yeah, he just made it was like make them learn a bunch Yeah, he was like you can't come in whenever you want and there's actually gonna be classes Yeah, and if you're a shithead, you're out of here. Just ask that fucking nephew of mine. Oh that fucking fuck up

He's just on thin ice isn't he look at him look at this letter. I got motherfucker. I swear to God one misstep. I'm there Cadets were taught using a recital method where they were required to demonstrate knowledge of concepts or formulas in front of their classmates and Instructor each day without the help of text or notes cadets were awarded a grade ranging from 3.0 Excellent to 0.0 complete failure Uh-huh a great but he did did he invent the that's the like the GPA. I don't know if he invented it Okay, maybe yeah, I think he might have okay a great Yeah, we'll get there a grade of 2.0 was considered barely passing each week the grades were tallyed up and cadets were either promoted or demoted

To more or less challenging classes the system of points also took into account Disciplinary merit demerits for such things as Unclaimliness tobacco use or gambling This grueling system was geared towards academic excellence and was even the model which colleges such as Harvard emulated throughout the 19th century So I guess he did yeah, wow the first half of West Point's existence did not witness the hazing rituals or class Segregations which were failed later on uh-oh instead an unwritten code of gentlemanly honor persisted when an issue arose or they were questioned They would often speak truthfully dueling of an outlawed by the army but any slight against a man by another was keenly felt at West Point many

Cadets kept pistols swords and knives concealed in their trunks for like in their rooms in case they were required Wait, so they're like there's like sneak duels. Yeah, they have like secret duels Man duels just got a whole lot spicier It's like it's like when you're not supposed to leave your high school campus Yeah, and then you leave and go to lunch. Yeah, like subway. Yeah, it's like that except it's dueling with death with death circling Alright, you ready to go outside and do a motherfucker From the Boston Gazette we are informed by the North New York American that a duel was fought Friday morning at Hoboken between two cadets from West Point

In which one of them was badly wounded. His name we understand is Maurice a native of Virginia The editor adds both parties if the sufferer survives, we presume will be dismissed from the Academy. Oh, man He woke up out of the coma. Well, let him know he's dismissed and fired Thayer had the old ramshackle buildings of the Revolutionary vintage replaced with two new barracks a north and south barracks a mess hall and a Academic building and a number of new quarters for the staff the barracks were laid out in several stories with rooms running off quarters Thayer built an academic institution with engineering at its core

He knew that to build a strong nation acquired engineers the graduates of West Point would eventually build the infrastructure of the industrial USA its railways bridges canals and borders Thayer done a tour of Europe and seen that science and engineering built strong nations Maybe the Republicans should take that tour Well, he was a fervent admirer of Napoleon Bonaparte whom he had hoped to meet on his trip in 1815 man That's an interesting get. Yeah That's a great sit down. Yeah, but it does sound like I mean all the stuff you're talking about Is stuff that like would be great to have somebody believe today in our government awesome They'll be great have a president who is just like we need to teach people shit

Hey, let's teach people shit and fix the bridges. Hmm. I don't like the sound of it. I like bridges that fall down Let's go to war war. No bridges. Yeah Yeah, yeah war fuck you bridges fuck you science and bridges That should be the that should be the Republicans the Republicans should now fight a war in the states on bridges Just like start actively trying to make the bridges fall apart faster fixing bridges cost money. So fuck you fuck you bridges There's a rigorous daily schedule encouraged a monastic like discipline and succeeded in turning the economy from a chaotic institution To a place of order and learning yet as diligent and as honorable as they were these young men With the same inclinations and pashes as any young men

Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah, here we go The coasters starting to go down. They just had few opportunities to exercise them when these passions were exercised They often erupted violently in 1825 the cadets were allowed to drink on two holidays The fourth of July and Christmas. I mean They those nights have to be fucking crazy. Well, yeah, how could they not be? I mean you're drinking you're been to an office party. Yeah, right Yeah, now imagine never being able to drink outside of the office and having an office party The fourth of July celebration got completely out of hand when half-naked students led a quote snake dance and hoisted the school's

Commandant William Worth on their shoulders. The result of this incident was that in 1826 the cadets were informed that their Christmas would be alcohol-free arrests and expulsions faced those who broke the rules a Few of the cadets took Thayer's new rules as a challenge and set upon a personal mission to make Christmas the biggest party West Point Snap This is exciting Thayer's ban on alcohol didn't extend past the boundaries of the Academy and various drinking establishments Existed outside of West Point. Hmm. There were two taverns located just outside the walls of the Academy Those popular of these Benny Havens Tatterberg tavern is still immortalized in a mural on the mess Hall's wall

Benny Havens had served as a first lieutenant in the War of 1812 Occupied a one-story cottage a short distance west of the Old Cadet Hospital At first Benny sold only ale cider and buckwheat cakes. Oh, man. I love a good buckwheat cake. That's just hey What do you got here? We got an ale. We got cider. We got buckwheat cakes. I'll have a cider and a buckwheat cake I'll have an ale too He subsequently began dispensing a more potent beverage only as a result in 1832 He was expelled from the military reservation Shortly after his expulsion Benny Havens opened a tavern on the river's edge below the cliffs of Highland Falls

Okay, still sticking close. Sure. Yeah, I'll get off the reservation. Yeah, but I'll be right down the street Benny Havens Tavern was the only one that allowed the bartering of shoes and blankets for liquor. God damn it This is a better time. I Literally just dropped off like three pairs of shoes to the Salvation Army a couple days ago Yeah, you could have gotten some beers. I could have gone down to the shortstop and gotten shit-canned. Yeah Six shoes. What do that get me a whole night of drinking sun? Fuck yeah Unlimited pool and shots for those converse you just brought in

But they would not take uniforms from the school Okay, all right, we got our limits gents, right? Nothing I can do with uniforms. Okay Wish you guys had some blankets. I really do oh blankets or shoes Yeah, I know they haven't been invented yet, but you got Adidas. Yeah, God. I would love those Because the men Adidas is what they're actually called, which I just can't know why that's saying that's because it's from Germany It's Adidas. Yeah, you know, listen, it's I mean, I'm sure Audi's pronounced a little differently, but come on I know I'm just I'm just doing what I'm told

Because the man at West Point had no money the Tavern would usually usually allow them credit for a year at a time Edgar Allen Poe spent the majority of his time at West Point at Benny Haven and his continued absences eventually led to his Dismissal after one year. Yeah, but what did he ever do the nothing? Yeah, total loser Yeah, the taverns were technically illegal to visit But as long as a cadet wasn't caught or commanding officer turned a blind eye They remained an essential place to cool off with friends. Enjoy a warm flapjack and Drink up get a buckwheat cake and some cider. Mmm, girl Maybe

Pay two shoes and a blanket for the night girl. I mean this now you're my girl. I've had a lot of cider He's talking to the blanket with shoes inside of it Fucked up before 1826 another tavern existed on the property directly behind West Point North's Tavern as it was called it was so close to the Academy that it often enticed cadets They are dealt with this temptation by purchasing the property and turning the tavern into a hospital. What a fucking asshole. Yeah Yeah That's that's quite a downgrade. Yeah Jefferson Davis who would go on to be the future president of the Confederate States during the Civil War, okay?

Had a history of bad behavior while drunk He was the first in to be arrested for going to Benny Haven another time Davis was reportedly so drunk That he fell down a 60-foot ravine while bolting from the tavern because a professor had come in In retrospect 60 feet his friend shouted down to him to respond if he wasn't dead Jefferson wanted to laugh at the ridiculous question, but he was in so much pain All he could do was raise one bloody hand to show that he was still alive That's quite a trade-off for not getting caught drinking

You have one bloody arm that's working He was hospitalized for four months. Oh my god. It's really like Will Ferrell and Austin Powers Holy shit four months Because because then obviously you're caught too. It's not like they're like no None of that worked out. What was he doing? He was hand gliding and forgot the equipment Sider gliding yeah What a group of Dave Jefferson Davis's friends suggested they flout the superintendents a new law and throw a christmas eve rager The night of december 24th

1826 Davis was on board. Oh boy Their choice of holiday beverage for the party was the notorious eggnog Oh god Nowadays eggnog isn't necessarily snimes with alcohol in the 18th and 19th century However, eggnog was more often than not alcoholic. I think that's true today Yeah, maybe but some people just drink the eggnog. Those people are serial killers. I want an egg drink I want an egg drink with no real benefit buzz wise. Oh god. I am full. Yeah. I've had a thimble So, uh

So it was mostly alcoholic a descendant of a widely drunk hot milk punch known as a posse Which contained curdled wine or ale Yeah, now the hot milk punch That contained curdled wine or ale I think that just these last three sentences you've said and have ended my time with eggnog for good Yeah, just actually now thinking about what it is. I think it's over with me and eggnog Yeah, it's definitely not that I was a big, you know, not that I was a nager You're a nager. Uh, you know recovering

The number of small dairy farms in colonial america in the 19th century made milk cream and eggnog more accessible To the american public nog is essentially a mixture of four items found on any colonial farm chickens cows sugar and booze Great because chickens make eggs who who cows make milk and then sugar and booze But who's how did it start? Who was the first lunatic? It was like, I don't know. I got a feeling Let's put this out on a cup. You know, I just did something pretty fantastic Oh, it's a bread trick. Okay. I mean, oh, listen to me. It's not crazy But I took the cow milk and I put an egg in it and now let's get drunk with it Everybody, raise your bread drinks

So vomiting oddly The type and taste of nog could be hidden with spices It's it's terrible. Let's put some cinnamon in it. Okay, you know, it'll sound this is a little kick Not a mag I think we're on to something here. Oh my god, I put four eggs Some milk and sugar rum in here Yuck Let's put it in it. Let's put it on a table and then the sun and drink from it all day

It's called nog. Come on room temperature are hotter. It's noggy During the height of the triangle trade, which is um when the people traded triangle sugar slaves and rum Oh god the triangle trade, right? I will trade you my rum for his slave and he'll trade you No, I'll trade you some sugar. You trade your slave to berry Berry will trade the rum to you and then you trade it to me. It seems pretty straightforward and morally acceptable Holy fuck, it's a triangle So rum was widely available as such a A widely available drink eggnog became a very popular beverage with americans

George washington even had a famous recipe for the drink that included rum cherry brandy and whiskey for an extra kick No kind of liquor was specified. The rule was the more liquor the merrier. Oh boy Several nights before christmas three cadets center robertson Burnley Crossed the Hudson river to martin's tavern tavern to get as much whiskey as they could buy with the money collected from the north barracks jefferson davis stalker fairly and gion went to benny havens bribing a guard with 35 cents to borrow boat and cross the river. That's just a different time. That's just that's just a bad west point guard

Yeah, 35 cents. I mean Who knows what it is back down really bucks. Come on. Yeah. Yeah, okay They came back with uh, three to four of flagans of liquor. So that's like a pitch. Okay Mutton was smuggled in from benny havens. Should anyone need something to eat? Jesus christ. So So We're basically talking about a mutton and nog party. Yeah This is this will get stinky. It's gonna go good Hatfuls of eggs and gallons of fresh milk were purchased from farmers close to the academy

Mutton pork and turkey from benny's which they plan to heat over their fireplaces in their rooms Just does not sound fun. I mean, I know they want to get shitfaced. I don't have a good time, but Fresh room mutton, you know what I mean? Oh got that freshly cooked mutton some hot eggs and rum Ho ho ho they stole sugar bread butter condiments from the kitchen the cinnamon and nutmeg were also Provided by benny havens the containers of alcohol and food were then stored among the cadets private possessions hidden until the night of christmas Oh god Man, what is fair was strict but not stupid cadets had smuggled alcohol into the academy before and those situations have been dealt with on

Individual basis. He assumed that with the holidays. There would be similar incidents In fact, he discussed such a possibility with colleagues at a small party the night before But there took nothing more than standard precautions assigning two officers Captain Ethan Allen Hitchcock a faculty member in military tactics and lieutenant William A Thornton to monitor the north barracks He also assigned cadets in charge of every floor in the barracks holding them responsible if anything went wrong Oh boy. Well, I have a feeling things are going to go wrong. No. Yeah Lieutenant Eaton was on watch in the guard room on christmas eve in the guard room was a large drum at a military fife

Which were used in the morning and night to signal the beginning and end of the day Each morning the drummer would strap on the drum and stand between the north and south barracks At the first sight of the sun. He would beat the call to summon the cadets From the barracks for roll call a drum would also signify breakfast and the start of classes Okay at 10 p.m. On december 24th He sounded the nightly call for all cadets to be in the rooms in room 28 of the north barracks, however cadets swords

barion Sullivan skip with stalker and billy murdoch were mixing Tennessee style eggnog in wooden buckets Jesus So this this is christmas eve. They're doing this. Yeah, okay as long as they're not making nog at 24 hours in advance No, it's they're they're noggin it now. Yeah, okay. You want the nog nice and sour? Yeah In room five. Well, I mean the milk has been sitting around for a while

I will look by no means is this acceptable to digest. I'm not suggesting that at all In room five one level down and directly across from hitchcock's room jefferson davis giong bombford cob and billy fits jerald a top five student Was billy uh-huh We're also drinking eggnog fairly suddenly decided to make another trip To a local tavern as he was afraid that the supply would run low Jesus

Hitchcock or old hitch as the cadets call them Walked the halls until 3 a.m. When he went to bed unaware of the parties across the hall and on the level above him So, how are they? How are they not making? How does he not aware? They're just super not hearing them. They're just not loud Just quiet as fuck a quiet party quietly getting drunk. Wow. That's got to be really that's got to be an interesting way to party. Yeah Whisper party with eggnog. Yeah, I would blow off a lot of steam. I'd be like The best time right now. Oh my god. This thing is so So thick this is a fucking ranger I feel alive

At 4 a.m. Hitchcock awoke to the sound of noisy cadets a few floors above him. Oh dear It's happening going up one story to room 28. He knocked on the door Which opened to reveal several men in a room smelling of liquor and a recently smothered fire Which was clearly being used to reheat food Although he did not see any liquor. He did see human-like shapes under a blanket He ordered the two men out of the blanket to come out which they did sheepishly He then ordered several men to go back to their rooms It then became apparent that there was another cadet under the blanket

Hitchcock ordered him to stand up. The figure did but to not remove the blanket rising as a ghost-like figure Uncommon yourself, sir. Hitchcock shouted the shrouded figure tried to edge its way out of the room He thinks it's a cloak of invisibility You can't see me when I'm under the sheet. He's talking to someone else. This is the best guy ever. I'm going away This never happened Uncommon yourself, sir. Hitchcock shouted. Oh, all right. I'll do that Hitchcock yanked the cover from the man to reveal a cadet in uniform But still with a cap held in front of his face to hide his identity

This guy This is like pixelations before the tv was invented Hitchcock ordered the cadet to show his face several times, but the cadet just stood there cap in front of his face This guy's a legend This is like total legend. This is like the unfireable guy Several other cadets looked on and stunned silence. She's like Jesus Christ. What's he doing? Hitchcock waited a full 15 seconds after his last command. Sir, do not compel me to use violence with a gentleman. He said The figure tried for the door, but again Hitchcock blocked his path

Finally Hitchcock snapped the cap away from the figure to reveal the face of George Skeppwith Hitchcock ordered him to his room and then told the cadets they were under arrest and ordered them to go to bed The captain left the room at 4 15 a.m. And returned to his room to sleep After Hitchcock left Billy Murdock was furious that Hitchcock had used force on a Skeppwith Slighting his honor. Oh boy He said to Fitzgerald and stalker stalker who had moved up for moon 5 get your bayonets boys and pistols Have you have them before this night is over Hitchcock will be dead. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Okay. Whoa. All right now Hold on a second party's getting started. Whoa. No the party's over party's getting started the party's over

We're out of nog. We're all drunk. It's getting good. I don't think it's time to kill a man. Oh, disagree. I disagree He forcibly removed He skipped a hat. I wonder why they don't want them drinking booze Yeah, they're not good at it Some man's gonna die Shortly after arriving back in his room Hitchcock heard footsteps coming down the hall The feet stopped in front of his door and he heard whispers after a pause the door Reverberated with three solid blows made from a pistol butt or club. Jesus christ. Are they gonna kill him?

The feet ran away as Hitchcock opened his door down the corridor. He saw a figure call Halle hooh Hitch before fading away. Whoa. Okay. Wow. We've got a couple MVPs working in this one If only that was skip that guy would be the best Halle hooh Where's that guy? Hitchcock heard doors slamming above and more footsteps in the occasional curse clearly shit was about to get real He went up to the third floor in search of Thornton

So Thornton is the other guy Thornton is supposed to be on the right. Okay. He's on he's on Hitchcock's side Thornton Yeah, he's on hit the two guys that are supposed to be right in charge right and so far not going well. Not going well In the corridor, he came across a stalker carrying a stick of wood and reeling with drunkenness Hitchcock ordered him to stop but stalker just stood there watching him Going going on necessary business captain replied stalker before staggering down the hall again. Oh dear He stopped to lean against the wall and retched but did not vomit Hitchcock continued on and went to the second floor He's like all right. I'm gonna put a pin in this that guy's there that guy's gonna

I'll be back when you're done retching like a sick bird Yeah, good. By the way, the smell of the wretch not good not good. It's mutton and nog. Oh god God Jevron Zendavis heard Hitchcock steps from room 11 where the another party was going on and saw him moving towards room 5 Having heard their collective move of defiance against authority while having a drink in room 5 earlier that evening Davis decided to save Hitchcock Hitchcock had present previously spoken highly of Davis at a court marshal As Hitchcock entered room 5 to be confronted by a party even bigger than room 28

Davis burst in and shouted put away the grog boys captain Hitchcock's coming only to realize Hitchcock was already there Wait, sorry. So so Hitchcock goes into the room. So Davis heard they were gonna they were threatening to kill Hitchcock so He saw him walking that way And then he ran down to the room and burst in and yelled everybody watch out Hitchcock coming But Hitchcock was already but it was just a straight-up miscommunication. That wasn't like a tactic or anything He he just was like going to save him, but he's already in the room. Yeah, okay. Interesting. So Hitchcock was like, oh god Okay, you're not helping. Thanks for all the help asshole

Davis and others were placed under arrest in order to their rooms Hitchcock read the group the riot act Which is the thing which declares that any group of 12 or more people Are unlawfully assembled. Okay, and open to punitive action, right? So he read them the actual riot act So he's right. So he the real riot act. They are drunk with swords and pistols and he's Reading a law. He's reading a lot of them. I'm sure that'll work. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Where's it not worked? Well, yeah, it's a straightforward thing. Yeah, no better way to calm them down than tell them to stop Little work. Davis returned to his room Hitchcock questioned the occupant about liquor then Hitchcock ordered Sevier the cadet responsible for the room to open trunks

Sevier refused instead simply lying down against a wall Okay Interesting interesting way to take the note. No sleep open these trunks Ask a sleep here against this I'm sure about a handle the situation Hitchcock left it was now 450 p.m. Am sorry 450 am it's it's it's not I mean at this point it's kind of a race against time It's just kind of like wait a couple more hours and the day's gonna start Yeah, it's like your vampire movie. Yeah, right. Yeah, it's daylight exactly

Three cadets were discovered by cadet James G. Overton a relief sentinel and not involved in the parties And he questioned them about their actions. They gave a drunken explanation about needing drums and a fife We've actually when we were trying to help because we had to get the fife I was just kidding because the drum what it goes Don't talk anymore No, no, what we're trying to stop helping me. We're trying. We're trying as we're saying is well How's everyone gonna wake up out of the five? It was why we helpful

She's probably fucking this up. He knows he was drunk The other officers given the duty of keeping an eye on the cadets Oh, sorry, that's Thornton a woke around this time So Thornton rose and began wandering through the quarters where he found two cadets With ruffled and unbuttoned shirts. Imagine him just going out for like his morning. Like, all right, make sure everything's tipped off Hello gentlemen Hi guys, how are you? What's going on? Oh dear, oh dear

This is my chest. Excuse me. This is my chest Okay, it's open. Um If you've seen Barry, he's going Uh I'm gonna come right back. Good morning. Okay. Goodbye for now one of these two, uh Cadets was Fitzgerald the top five uh-huh

Only at this time he was a lot less than the top five because he was wielding a curved sword. Sure Thornton placed him. Does that mean penis? Uh, yeah, okay Thornton placed them under arrest and told them to return to their rooms He asked Fitzgerald for the weapon, but Fitzgerald refused Screaming at Thornton maniacally dudes. Okay Yeah, it says to be fucking terrifying. Give me your sword, soldier He's literally like probably expecting everything to be cool. Yeah, then he's walking the grounds And these guys who are like being trained to be the best, you know, the best young fighters in the best soldiers in the world

Uh are all Fucking shit canned in just varying scales of like too drunk to stand to like maybe going to kill him That's pretty much it and he's alone just trying to walk the grounds I mean, it's almost like the night of the living dead. It feels like a zombie movie. We're like, all righty. It's not good. Yeah Uh Fitzgerald then struck the floor three times with his sword and walked off to room 29 loving how he's handling it Loving loving the move Just then Thornton heard the sound of a drum and fife outside. Oh good morning

Men were cheering the musicians who had stolen the instruments from Eaton's guard room. They got so drunk They stopped caring about being caught Totally like they it probably started out as like a let's sneak it and we'll be hung over and now they're literally they've stolen shit And they're laughing and Thornton's there Thornton went down Stairs to put an end to the terrible music But never made it as he was struck by cadet roberts with a piece of firewood and knocked unconscious. Jesus christ. Yeah It's not good taking care of business. Listen. Did did he read the riot act properly?

Hallways were now complete chaos Man ran from room to room waving swords and muskets. Yeah yells echoed the hallways Firewood was thrown about crashing into walls and windows an occasional shot was fired A cadet opened a window for fresh air only to vomit and crash unconscious Passing out in his own filth. Oh wait. So he he barfed out the window and then fell out the window onto his barf. Yeah It's just a landing spot Honestly, I could picturing this is insane. Yeah, okay All right, meanwhile at 5 a.m. Cadet Guion got a pistol from the south barracks and with the intent of killing Hitchcock

This is insane Okay, okay at the same time Hitchcock was in his room. I mean they got so drunk. They wanted to kill everyone Yeah, like anyone above them. They now want to kill. Yeah, it's lord of the flies. Okay, good So Hitchcock was in his room at this point worried that blood would be spilled Suddenly there were violent blows on his door Firewood was being heaved at the door like a battering ram Guion smashed at the door, which was very close to splintering Impatient he pulled out his pistol and aimed at the door

The crowd of men around himself violent as he pulled the trigger Cadet Thompson accidentally bumped him causing the shot to hit the side of the door Stones were now being thrown at the barrack windows from outside including Hitchcock's Hitchcock so they're just breaking all the windows. Yeah, no, if you're Hitchcock you're like, well, this is not good This is not good I should have put three guys on guard Hitchcock burst out of his room and the startled cadets were treated in the quarter Hitchcock saw men smashing windows with clubs Go to your room. He ordered some of the men some of the men did but most did not Hitchcock abandoned that philosophy

If anything, it's now. This is what you do now. This is the move You pretend you got drunk too and you also want to kill the people on your staff Hitchcock then heard the morning bugle call and thinking this meant it was daylight. He was relieved But what an idiot. It was not. It was a false morning bugle call Oh, I got the bugle. That guy just plowed. Yeah, but also what does he think like a bugle's not gonna stop them No, but he just thought yeah, the bugle's not gonna make them all be like, oh wait a minute We reacted badly He went to Thornton's room, but no one was there and rocks were being thrown at Thornton's windows by giggling men

Giggling Leaving Thornton's room Hitchcock came up against another man whom he ordered to halt But the cadet instead raised a club against Hitchcock. Okay. There was a brief struggle before the cadet dashed off Another man Hitchcock encountered just stood there until Hitchcock moved on Awkward. I love those guys. Yeah The ones where he's just like, I think it's just better if I just walk by this one He he then arrested Hamilton for a third time that night when he was caught in the hallways Oh

Well, maybe it's time to switch tactics Hitchcock saw cadet overton and ordered him to get the calm here meaning commandant worth A bunch of drunk cadets overheard this as get the bombardiers The hated artillery men I'm okay. Wait, so he he he wanted the commandeer and what do they think? So he said he said get the calm here and they thought he said get the bombardier and that means kill That means that these artillery guys that they hate are coming. Oh Jesus

Oh, oh shit. They're like motherfucker. No way. So stalker loaded his pistol with gunpowder Uh, uh and no balls firing at several times He ordered men to fortify the north barracks against the oncoming attack from the bombardiers. Oh my god. They're so drunk They're so drunk Murdoch heard the rumor and awaited the invasion. He stood at the east He asked for a guy He stood at the entrance to the barracks and asked each cadet passing. Are you a bombardier or a gentleman? Well, what the fuck? I mean, what what sort of this is like

It's almost like they don't they some of them haven't heard about lying yet. Yeah Um gentlemen, well your story checks out come on in Fitzgerald his hand now cut and bleeding by the window panes. He has sliced with his sword Good move made his way to room 11 in the south barracks there. He rallied men to join the fight against the bombardiers Before he fell asleep on his bloodied forearms. Alrighty our leader everyone our fearless leader Let's go get him right now. We're gonna kill the Wait a minute Hitchcock continued to try to restore order in the north barracks and he got into a fist fight with cadet walter ot

It must be pretty fun to fist fight a guy that drunk when you're totally sober I mean so easy. You know what I mean? You're just kind of like, all right. You know what motherfucker? This is over. Although you he'd be the kind of guy you would punch and you'd be like, I feel nothing still He'd be like, I will keep punching you until you feel something Thorne the woke on the stairway where he had been knocked out and returned to his room Okay Hitchcock greeted him in his room at 545 a.m. By six o'clock

Other cadets who were not drinking also got involved in restoring order at the same time the main riders were attempting to recruit other cadets But having little success. Well, it's also it's 6 a.m. Yeah, and try like A drunken recruit to a sober person So i'm telling you this the way it's like, uh, no, you're really fucked up. It's just getting started. It's more nog No, no, no, no more. No, no more nog to you guys. He has a sword. No more. No, Spitzy shouldn't have a sword His hand is not open right in the window. No, no, no, no, no. No, you guys no more nog guys That's our fight here. Yeah, no, no guys fight guys Spitzy's got a sword. No, Spitzy's hand. Spitzy's really badly wounded No, I know you shouldn't be using those though. Oh, but let's get going. No, no, no, no come on. No more nog

Come on Barry. No, no more. No. All right one nog Finally day they broke and the real morning bugle was sounded Commandant William worth had by this point Come to put an end to the chaos just his presence ended the man. Oh boy Party's over Worth saw men strewn on stairways and leaning on rally on railings Glass was smashed glass was everywhere. The men gathered in assembly area at around 7 a.m Oh man, so uncomfortable all the men from the south barracks completely sober woke shocked to find

Such a scene of destruction. When has it been smashed along with the building's furniture banisters have been ripped from stairways Thrown down with other rubble shards of shattered plates dishes and cups were on the ground Meanwhile, the north barrack cadets stumbled out of the barracks closed horn Many were barefoot swearing threatening academy officials and obviously still very drunk. Jesus christ Coming out with no shoes in a torn shirt. Oh, fuck you my fuck. She fucked my dick, Lieutenant Sit down son. Sit down. Fuck you. Shut back face. I traded my shoes for rums Sound the fife. Jesus christ Uh, some men remained in the rooms and continued drinking

Man those guys legends champions legends champions Behind the cadets who attempted to line up in uh parade formation West points north barracks stood in a state of near ruin two cadets were hugging and crying and laughing An ever-increasing group of men were ignoring roll call or answering. Yes to every name call. Yep President to their huge delight president Monroe here check it here Smith sir Hamilton boasted of his drum playing

Well, it's time for Hamilton to shut the fuck up Just like I'm really good at the drum I'm one of the best at the drums. Please tell me drum or drummulton I am the drum Oh boy, I think I'm gonna puke on the five Some still cried out that the bombardiers were coming Men smashed windows on their way to roll call so a guy hears the roll call horn And he's just walking there throwing rocks at windows as he goes. It's an either or just keep rioting or go to roll call

The officers just stood there taking notes Roll call was finally abandoned due to chaos. Oh, Jesus christ Uh during breakfast fights continued to break out in the mess hall What how is I mean How are they not getting it a little under how is like breakfast happening? I think they're so hammered they can't and there's so many of them. They're just like, okay Just let them go until they Peter. Oh, so they are just like what we'll they're just watching. They're just watching and taking notes in this way After breakfast they went to chapel for a two-hour service

Well, I'm sure that that was very very religious 22 cadets were then placed under house arrest until further notice among them was Jefferson Davis Who had been reported as one of the criminals by Hitchcock and Thornton About a third of the cadets approximately a hundred men had been involved in what would come to be known as the egg nog riot Wow, finally the craziest riot name ever. Yep An inquire was open after almost a month of investigation The decision was made to court marshal 19 cadets for their conduct on christmas eve In dining too many men would have reflected poorly on the academy by reinforcing its old image of an

Place of anarchy. Oh Thayer chose to deal with only the most aggressive offenders The inquiry included testimony from 167 witnesses Holy shit the gentlemanly code of honor among the cadets and what they saw as their moral obligation to tell the truth meant that thousands of pages of transcriptions of the accounts of men had been collected By march 8 11 cadets found that they no longer were allowed to wear the gray and were dismissed from west point These were the ones who had smuggled the whiskey the cadets who incited the riots and several others those expelled included Fitzgerald

Guion and stalker the Eight cadets were given Eight other cadets were given a reprieve including mad billy murdoch private John duggan The man who'd taken the 35 cents at the river. Okay. I'm really sorry I mean really that guy was the seed. Yeah, he was sentenced to one month hard labor and Forfitted a whiskey ration for the same period

Okay, Thornton was assaulted with a club in 1828 by cadet and that cadet was given the death penalty Which was later commuted Thayer continued to strengthen west point as an academic institution Leaving in 1833 having influenced other institutions including harbert and the u.s. Naval Academy. He died in 1872 having never married His remains were buried at west point. No charges were filed against jefferson davis Turns out jefferson davis had missed almost everything instead of following his friends and a resisting arrest davis stumbled back to his room Threw up and passed out cold. It's a nice pass out right there In his memoirs davis would claim that he didn't name names, but in fact records show that he implicated his roommate in the melee

When his roommate returned to their dorm woke davis up and loaded his gun. Well, that's interesting morning Guys, what's going on? Just getting us to take off. Hey You're not getting name names, right? No, I shut your mouth davi David's graduated at the bottom of his class. All right time at the academy brewed a long lasting hatred for yankees In 1861 he was inaugurated as the president of the confederate states of america What he continued to love eggnaugh. Yeah, he was the oh, that's the guy. Oh, yeah That's so wait bottom of the class. Yep. Okay, cool. Yeah bottom of the class total drunk idiot

Hey president of the confederates come lead us and our normal beliefs Hitchcock left and came back to west point as commandant He then left again and was promoted to major in 1838 by 1842 He achieved the rank of lieutenant colonel in the third infantry regimen in command of fort standsbury. He served in the seminal war in florida and in the Mexican-american war where he served as general windford scott's inspector general in the march on mexico city He even uh, well, he he received a brevet promotion to colonel, which is like a You get it for exemplary actions in battle. Okay

For contra Ross and to brigade general for malino del re in october 1855 he resigned from the army following a refusal by secretary of war Jefferson davis to extend a four-month leaves of absence that he had requested for reasons of help interesting Yeah, how about that funny how that worked out? Hey, you remember the egg not right motherfucker? Yeah. Yeah, so uh, Who's my bitch? No, I was just gonna I wanted to say you know, I was my bitch I'm your bitch and yeah, and I love it. So you can't have what do you want? What would you ask me ask me for something? Ask me for something. I'm your boss

Ask me. Will you forgive me? Nope. Can I use a pencil? Can I do you want something else? Is there any way to get a buck weed? Nope Any whiskey? Nope. Can I kiss you? Nope. Kiss me? Nope Kiss you. Do you see how this is working? Yeah, not well. Okay. Okay uh These days not many current cadets at west point know about the egg rock egg nog riot. Yeah, I'm sure they're like, uh, yeah Nothing none of the buildings from the egg nog riot remain on west point's present day campus But the riots didn't have a lasting impact impact on the campus's architecture

In the 1840s when new barracks were built they included short hallways that required cadets to exit the building entirely in order to access another floor This in this building crowd control made it harder for cadets to get out of hand and gather in large numbers. Wow West point no longer has a grand holiday celebration. Why? And where there are parties access to alcohol is extremely limited. So the odds of rowdy cadets drinking too much Of the good stuff remains the stuff of legend Holy shit That's something, huh? Yeah Yeah

An egg nog fueled west point riot. Yeah. Yeah, that's something I mean It's probably easy to tear those buildings down though after the kids got involved Probably like man, it's not much the foundation just needs to be stripped. That should be a movie. Oh god. Are you kidding me? Yeah, it's nuts. It's like fucking incredible. Yeah It's animal house on egg nog. It really is. It really is Even down to the zero point zero Jesus

God bless america. Yeah, I mean, um Hey, you know what I mean? Yeah God bless this mess