The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #113 Rabbi Hopping with Tovah Silbermann

Episode Date: December 6, 2022

Tovah Silbermann (Girlfriend) shares the downsides of sharing a meal with Gianmarco, having night terrors, washing kitchenware in the ocean, testing for Tay-Sachs, and we debate what a man’s responsibility is if he falls off a roof into a woman while fully erect. We also dive a little too deep into the Yeshiva Boys Choir and the Miami Boys Choir and why if Gianmarco and her go to one of their concerts he has to wear a yarmulke. You can watch full video of this episode HERE! Join the Patreon for ad-free episodes, exclusive content, and MORE. Listen to our live weekly show on AMP, every Tuesday at 4 PM ET. Follow Tovah Silbermann on Instagram and Twitter Follow Gianmarco Soresi on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, & YouTube Subscribe to Gianmarco Soresi's email & texting lists Check out Gianmarco Soresi's bi-monthly show in NYC Get tickets to see Gianmarco Soresi in a city near you Watch Gianmarco Soresi's special "Shelf Life" on Amazon Follow Russell Daniels on Twitter & Instagram See Russell in Titanique through February 2023! E-mail the show at [e-mail] Produced by Paige Asachika & Gianmarco Soresi Video edited by Spencer Sileo Special Thanks Tovah Silbermann Part of the Authentic Podcast Network Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

all right i'm in a bad mood i had such a fun thing ready for this and it fucking was ruined by all my technical problems i was so mad when you started saying what's that fart sound yeah because i didn't have the headphones on so i was like wait what are they what are they hearing yeah and it was uh it was spoiled long long fart i was gonna play let me explain the bit it's always funny when you explain a bit. I was going to do two of Tova's night terrors in a row. We were going to talk about the night terrors, of course. And then for the third one, I was going to be like,

this is an old one I found, and it was this. and the fart played early before this recording began and uh tova knowing she put the complexities of my comedic mind immediately knew where it was going. Welcome to the downside. My name is Jamarcus Araizi. I'm here with my co-host, Russell Daniels. This is an evergreen episode. We're saving this. What does that mean?

That means he's not going to put this out unless he's fucked one week. Oh, okay. So this is going to come out and we'll be broken up by the time this comes out. Because sometimes for work, when I like have to do the social media calendar, they'll be like, use an evergreen. And that's like something I can use. So you haven't known the definition of that in all the times you've been doing it for work?

For me, it meant like something we've already done that we can use again, like whenever. Sure, sure. So I guess we can use this whenever that makes sense now in this context but for my mind i was like are we gonna keep replaying this one like like just like just every week anytime we need patreon i think i think listen people have asked for tova we had tova episodes specifically for the patreon that i don't think anyone listened to but they were good uh we talked about making when we when tova and i first started uh knowing each other this was during covid and uh i i basically we would talk it was me her and carly hugendijk and then carly would go home

and tova and i would stay up and talk and i posted on my instagram i said four in the morning i like four in the morning i was like do you meet someone and you're just like, you want to start a podcast with them? And I was like, I think he likes me. And so I had to, you know. I think Jamarco has a crush on you. And it's a long play. So I had to go through a lot of things to get to this point. Yeah.

But I finally got her on the podcast Tova, do you want to say something sad to kick us off? Oh my god Oh, I didn't even prepare I'm such an avid listener You can say any I mean, listen I've heard you say 10 negative things today

Surely you can think of one People are using cilantro too much And it's ruining my life This is the downside Nope One, two, three Downside too much and it's ruining my life this is the downside nope you're listening to the downside the downside with john marco cerezi just for listeners uh you know i feel sometimes on this podcast i i some people express views that i don't agree with i don't believe the cilantro allergy is real and i think tome has been making enough attention this whole time about my allergies about everything

um list all the allergies really quick okay you're going to a wedding you got 30 seconds to list everything so there's on the way to the wedding the pollen the dander the trees the grass the cats i'm allergic to grass too grass all the when i did an allergy test when i was in elementary school in new orleans i was allergic to every single type of tree they tested me for so all that cats fuck cats sorry russell that's okay um and then when we get to the wedding it's bananas melon except dates, and then that's the allergies. Then I don't like, I have the cilantro gene where it tastes like soap. It's not an allergy.

I know. I said it was an allergy. I know this. It's an aversion. And then I don't like lamb. I think it tastes like woolly. Like it's the texture I don't like. And then I keep kosher, so I don't eat shellfish or pork.

You can have bananas? I didn't know that. I know. No smoothies. Like, you'll get, like, swollen? The good thing is, all of it's very mild. So, like, I'm not going to die from any of it. I'm not going to go into anaphylactic shock.

Except cats, I, like, almost did. She was fucking for a week after a week. Yeah, after your house. I didn't want fucking for a week after week. Yeah. After your house. I didn't want to make a deal of it. But I was like truly ill for my eyes. But my eyes get like itchy and swollen and goopy. And like this, I was just like wet for like a week. Just like rolling down my face.

And then I'll get like itchy under my ribs. Like for food and stuff where like I can't scratch it because it's inside. Yeah. Is it the same for grass and trees? Like you itchy eyes? Yeah, it's itchy eyes. That's me. It's the goopy.

Like when I used to mow the lawn, my family thought I was like being like dramatic that I didn't want to mow the lawn. But I would like start crying and I couldn't stop sneezing and my eyes would get all red. And it's cut grass. It would just drive me me really, really crazy. So for new listeners of The Downside, as you can tell, our guest is Jewish. Thank you for joining. We've had a lot of requests to have Tova on.

Tova is my girlfriend. As of this recording, we're recording this October 10, 2022. I had someone in L.A. It was after a show, and they listened to the podcast, and they said, you always talk about your girlfriend. Marco, my girlfriend, Cereze. And she didn't mean it in a good way. It was, like, so sweet, but she meant it in, like, enough.

Girlfriend guy. Wife guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is your whole brand. I can tumble your whole brand. I've definitely liked working on the opener that is, like, about you right out the gate

Yeah yeah yeah What is the uncle function apology video Going to look like when you fire Jamarco for cheating on me one day Oh god We talked about it if we had been around Each other that day doing one For Jessica

Like doing one for Jessica So for, I said it would have been funny. Like doing one for Jessica. So for new listeners, my name is Jermarco. This is a podcast where we celebrate the negatives. Talk cynically but in a fun way. But there's no positivity here. There's no bright side except for a moment at the end. If you're a fan of this podcast, we got live episodes. I'm contractually obligated to say we got live episodes every Tuesday, 4 to 5 p.m.

EST on the new Amp app, Amazon's new app. We're doing great episodes there with very few listeners. Very interesting folks. Our last episode was so fucking fantastic. And I hope she didn't see the number in the corner that said six, indicating that other than me and Russell, there were four other listeners, including her, three others. You've got to stop saying that because we can't see it. They changed it for us. Right, you can't see it. You can't even see it.

I can't even see it. Because when we had Dan Savage on, I had a moment of just like I'm waiting for him to be like, does that ever four mean one person's listening or four people are listening? Because either way, I'm fucking out of here. I'm Dan Savage no and that was a great episode too the um the well here's i can say that i can see the faces and sometimes it's the same three faces in the bottom corner you know so i

know that those three people are here um and sometimes one of them leaves and and sometimes then i see it's a you see them walk maybe one other face. So there is a thing where but we can't get the number anymore. I think they changed that so people wouldn't see it and be like, oh, I'm not listening to this. But even the, well, we can't talk about that. We're releasing this in a bit. We can talk some shit.

I do want to say, if you want to listen to those episodes though, they are very good and we released them on our Patreon, patreon.com slash downside. And I think I'm going to have a new Patreon goody soon. I'm recording a clean album in December. Okay. This will probably come out before then.

I'm going to record a clean album. It's just for SiriusXM, just to make that sweet, clean sellout money where I talk about how much I love God. But I think I'm going to film it, and I'm going to release just the film thing as a special just for the Patreon. Oh, okay, great. So finally something extra for the Patreon. But people have been asking for us to have Tovan. In a way, you've had a lot of air time on this podcast. With the Night Cares?

Yes, we have some Night Cares. It's been a bit because they got better, but thankfully for our listeners, they've been getting worse again. Interesting. I feel like, Gianmarco, you have such a conflict in yourself because you don't want them to be better. You want to sleep through them and not have it affect you, but you want them to be. He wants that. I think being a stand-up comedian, there's a feeling of when bad things happen, including in life, outside of night terrors, but it's the same thing. There's like uh oh this is

going to be a good story and i and i can understand that sometimes in the moment sometimes the thing is too bad yeah you're out of you know when my dad had the heart surgery it took a couple seconds before i realized this is going to be a good bit yeah i'm working on a chunk so so i i we have so much to talk about but i do i feel like we owe it to our listeners to talk about some of these night terrors. They have been coming back. This was literally three days ago, this one. He's going to... Okay.

You can stop it. Let me get that. So, what do you think started that? Okay, so this is the next one. I believe this first one I was not there for. Yes, here we go. No, don't separate the earrings. Do not separate the earrings. Do not separate the earrings. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. Oh, my gosh.

Okay. No. Okay. Hold on. I would call that sleep talking. Yeah. That one's not. Okay. That's not terror.

That's what I've been telling you. That's not terror. That's an annoyed woman. I'm moving into sleep talking phase. And I okay that's what i've been telling you that's not terror that's an annoyed woman like you know and i think that's good i feel like i'm tired of this term but i do think it's appropriate here there's a bit of gaslighting going on where i keep being told that the night terrors are like okay right night whispers okay here's another complaint that's just like just like being like night grievances yeah grievances because she's just grievances because she's just like, don't separate the earrings. And it's like if you go to your earring drawer, I'm assuming, and you're missing one.

Why would you separate them? Yeah, where does that come from? I don't want them to be- It's like a normal grievance. And it wasn't yelling. It was very much like, oh, yeah, yeah. He's also like, where does that come from? I'm like, maybe because there's so much shit all over the room that I'm like, the earrings are going to get lost.

I've never separated the earrings, though. I've never separated the earrings. I've never touched the earrings. She's talking to herself. Okay. I wonder if she is talking to me, Russell. Let's see this next night whisper. Oh, my God.

A whimper? I don't know. I can't go with ties. John Marco I thought what's wrong so what's wrong I can't go to my I can't go with what's wrong I can't? I can't go. I can't go. So where? Sweetheart. To the airport. You want to go to the airport? Yeah because. Come back to bed sweetheart. You can go to the airport anytime you want. No but I can't. Alexa what time is it? The time is 4 0 5 a.05am I didn't want to get in trouble I didn't want to

When he asked me Alexa I think in my sleep I was like don't say Because he'll be mad that I know it's in the middle of the night Because I pray when I get woke up Please let it be like 8 Let it be 7.50 right before I'm about to wake up That's how my REM works There's something really funny about Tova's night terrors,

but there's also something really funny about your first awaking voice. It's very funny to me. Here's why. Here's why it's funny. Like, imagine it's a movie, and this is us. We're in our 80s now. We're still together. I mean, just listen to the voice, because that's what it makes me think of.

Oh, my God. I don't know. I can't go with tights. John Marco. What's wrong? It's like you don't have your dentures in. You don't have your dentures in. Exactly.

I can't go with. I do love that, John Marco. That is very funny. So, but do you get it? I do love that. Jamarco. That is very funny. Were you up in this? Did you get out of the bed? That one I did get out and I sat at the edge of the bed. I had a sleepwalking phase.

Last night you came into the kitchen area. I did? Yeah, you came into the kitchen. said were you still yeah i still have like sometimes like i was working on like a lines here yeah and i walked her back to the room and i was like let's let's go back down he's also twice come home and i've fallen asleep to a tiktok oh my god and it's just playing over and over again i'm just like it was so funny is because it means that she was swiping and like there was that final swipe where like she had enough consciousness to go swipe. And then.

I've done that on Twitter or Instagram and that makes me nervous of like liking something or you know what I mean? Like. Hello. I've texted him full sentences in my sleep. No. I meant like. Like yeah.

If you're like. If you're like falling asleep and you're like phone. You're just like kind of like hand is on an open phone. You could like move it and like something or retweet something you know is that what happened with the kanye look i as someone with night terrors i empathize with no um yeah i've texted john marco like full like where's the oil we need the oil and it's like four in the morning and that was you talking like an accident like no i said no i typed it because we only had enough oil for one night it ended up lasting eight crazy ones um so so let's

talk about these night terrors yeah you uh really don't think you had them as a kid nothing like this as a kid no my mom sleep talks and so i think it's my mom sleep talks and so I think My mom sleep talks And my dad has sleep apnea And I have sleep apnea But I refuse to look like a fucking dork And wear the machine Your snoring's gotten better But I think

We're definitely at a point That I think if someone saw Like Like You're such a good sleeper That when she snores I just I kind of shake you

And just go You're snoring And you move Or something clears out of the way well i think that's i think a lot of times if you hear a lot of my night hair start with and i think i think it's connected to the sleep apnea where i'm woken up by like a gasp big for air and that triggers whatever anxiety and that anxiety is whatever subconscious i have from the day and that's the spiral.

And I feel like it shifted. A long time my night terrors were like someone's breaking in the apartment and someone's stealing things. And a lot of my walking, my sleepwalking was that too, where I'd wake up and be like, where's my computer? It's in my hamper. Where's my jewelry? I shoved it under the bed.

And so I think it's because I got mugged. So what station were you mugged at? Spring Street on the C train platform at like 9 o'clock at night. It wasn't that late. It was before the pandemic. So it was also before things overall got more shifty in New York. It was a pretty safe situation. I was sitting on the subway platform on the bench and i

was texting and a guy just walked by and just grabbed my phone out of my hands i was obviously playing that like candy crush game i play yeah um he grabbed it and kept walking and i was um i was flying to la the next day to do a work trip and it was like an important work trip it was like i was early on in my job so i was like yeah and i think it was the holiday party probably i don't remember it was something like that like yeah it was like a big trip and my fight or flight was i'm going to la tomorrow and i need my phone like there was no version in my head where i wasn't going to la and you can't go to la without your phone yeah and so i that just triggered something in me and i chased him pushed him grabbed my phone back we got into an altercation he turned around and grabbed me and then we ended up on the concrete

on the subway platform my one of my contacts fell out of my I'm blind without my contacts. My contacts fell out You did not What you never told me that detail what that your contacts fell out one of them and I gotta say that one of the big recurring night terrors is my eyes Because We can put it in we can put it into the here keep talking so cuz I want to pull up That's a therapy. Where are my eyes? Because I have a video. I have a video. We can put it into the, keep talking. I want to pull up. There's a video recently where I got a midnight tear.

Sometimes I rarely get the videos because it happens really fast. But she, I went to the bedroom and she sat up fully with, from sleep, with glasses on her eyes. She had put them on in her sleep and said where are my glasses? And they were on her okay. I'll fight it, but yeah, so so then My phone like in the shuffle then this no one on the subway platform helps except for this one tiny woman who gets involved Helps tries to push him away from me and then while this is happening my purse like the contents my purse fall out and my wallet and you know it falls out and you know in a movie when like the in an altercation the gun falls out yes and then it kind of slides across the floor they all look

and they all go for it yeah that's exactly what happened where literally it was like in a movie my wallet slides across the three of us lunge. He grabs it. We both lunge towards him. And at this point, I think he, when he started this whole thing, he's like, I'll steal a phone. He was not, he didn't sign up for this. He didn't expect to be in a fight with two feisty women. And so I think at this point he was just like pissed off. And so he just threw my wallet onto the subway tracks and left.

And so I ended up getting my wallet off the tracks. Like they helped me. I got my phone. I got everything. But I was like my arm over the course of the next week, a handprint of bruises showed up. My arm was fucked up. My thumb was fucked up.

And I think, I mean, for a long time, like I don't know how like PTSD works. Like the very clear, like afterwards I was traumatized. I was like clutching my purse and like scared to be on the train and like very having stressful moments. And then over time that went away. But I think what remained was these night terrors that I get. And a lot of it was like someone's breaking in, someone's breaking in. And a lot of it was like someone's breaking in, someone's breaking in.

And when did you first – because obviously it's something that like – did you start noticing those weird things? So tell the Columbia incident. That's when like – but you knew by then. Yeah, I think so. I think that's probably around when it was like starting to get bad. But before the mugging, I would sleep sleepwalk so it's been an issue before and like in my sleep once i thought someone was coming through the window and i jumped out of bed and i banged on the window and it hairline like cracked across the whole window that was before the

mugging and so that was where i was like i've done i've done it once that was before the mugging yeah what yeah that's what I'm saying. This is why you have to do podcasts sometimes because you're like, wait a second. I've said this before. No way. I've told you this before. And another time I've like jumped on my laundry basket and like hit the side on like a metal whatever. And like it's always been a thing.

But I've gone through phases like right after college. I think it's anxiety related because it was like right after college or this or that. I think it's anxiety related because it was like right after college or this or that. And I think the sleepwalking happened right around the time where I had a job that I was like really unhappy at and really stressed about. And when I left that and started a new job, it was that went away. And then I think the mugging brought in the night terrors. And I think the sleepwalking is how I got diagnosed with sleep apnea. And that was before the night terrors.

Now, when you broke the window, did you wake up and realize what you'd done? Or were you like, oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you're just in this, like, panic. There's a phase. So there's a night terror phase where it's like. And also, it's not dreaming. I'm not having this dream someone's breaking in. Like, I don't go.

Like, whenever I have a bad dream, it's separate. Or like a, like, whatever. in I might like I don't go like whenever I have a bad dream it's separate or like a joy like whatever so when I'm in this this night terror state I'm not aware of it at all yeah internally or externally and then if someone like Joe Marco wakes me up or like I'll mid action I'll kind of realize what's happening but it takes a few then I'll wake up but it takes a few seconds to realize what's reality and what's not so there is like a lucid period where i am awake i know it was a night terror i know but i i have trouble like articulating what's reality and then i'll have reality so

this is one where i feel like you can see in the moment. Now, we're both naked in this clip, so disregard that. But in this moment, I feel like there's a moment where you, your brain recognizes you're being silly, but then you're still in the night terror. That's what I'm saying. Okay, so Ray, we're going to add this in post. It's going to cost me $1,000. But here is me, typical night coming home to Toba.

Yes, baby. but here is me typical night coming home to Toba yes baby do you have what are you alright do you have a pair of my glasses wait you're wearing them no another pair.

They're on him and Casey. And Casey's getting naked. They won't get naked, sweetheart. Can I get some water? I have so many. That really feels like a bit. Like, I mean, it's clearly not. But, like, it is so funny to be, But it is so funny to be so sleepy and serious and then be like, do you know where my glasses are?

Do you have multiple pairs of glasses? Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. That's what we thought the solution. I said, let's make it fucking rain with glasses. Rain-covered glasses. 12 pairs of glasses around the apartment.

Now, you still have the old, the one from Columbia. This is where you were staying with friends. I'll play it. send it to me and i'll try to put it in right now i don't know if i can do a big street but yeah basically me and three friends we went on a trip to columbia and we were in sharing a hotel room with two and two in a bed and i had a night terror that then um woke everyone up and it was so scary to them that they all started screaming and it was um it's my favorite one okay send it to me and i'll put it on the thing it's better that way uh so so yeah it's it's tough it's tough uh klonopin helps but but you kind of chilled out with klonopin for a bit yeah i will say it was tougher for me when I was dating because it was just awkward to be with men who, you know, I didn't want to, like, put them in an awkward position.

I forget, like, what your warning to me was. Oh, yeah. Like, what did you tell me? Like, did you have a lot, like a. I don't think I had, like, it's not like that was happening all the time. Would you tell it to the guy, like, or like before you fell asleep before i fell asleep like sure i feel like that's the way to go yeah i feel like it would be you know why early on you know sure all right i'm gonna see this could fuck up the whole recording we're gonna give it a shot i'm putting this over the fart that works so hard to get um so and and what did uh do you remember any times where the guy in the morning was like

jesus that was probably i i blocked out every man aside from you so i nothing's coming to mind all right let's see if it works. Oh, oh, wait. It's over, it's over, it's over, it's over. It's over, it's over, it's over. It's me, it's me. It's me. It's just me. I just hear the shit.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Okay, you can pause it. All right, I wanted you to play it one more time. The beginning of that sounds like a warm up. The shine. Yeah. So just, I want to clean. So this is Tova hanging out with friends and you didn't warn them that you have night terrors.

I think, I don't know. I'm trying to remember. You can warn people, but if they're in a dead sleep. It doesn't matter. They're like, they're not going to. Anna wasn't like, it's her night terrors. Yeah. Yeah.

It's four in the morning for her too. She was a little more like this. Oh, oh, wait. It's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's Tova, it's To quickly going it's Tova it's Tova it's Tova it's me that's you yeah oh you're in the dark you're saying it's Tova it's Tova it's the same way when you asked Alexa what time it was and I went

shh it's me like starting to sort of realize what's going on and not wanting to like make people freak out now you said

because I've noticed that it doesn't happen as often in hotels it doesn't happen really on planes once it happened on my flight back from england like a long plane ride but short i sleep on every plane and it doesn't happen

oh yeah that would be that would be stressful the plane thing so like what's what's left for us to do well you said we have you said so for a while it was better is there any way for a while it was better. Is there any way to pinpoint? For a while it was bad for a bit. And also, to be fair, Tova and I, and now Tova lives with me, but both of our places are right by the street. And we'll listen. We have this night terror app that basically records only. The reason we have all these is because it only records when there's noise.

And you'll hear it all the time, though. Probably every night there's noise. Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of just beeps and honks, and you're like, jeez, at four in the morning, someone just laid on the horn. A lot of times, John Marco will fall asleep listening to the Anthony Jeselnik's podcast, so for like an hour and a half, it's just Anthony Jeselnik speaking.

30 minutes, I put it on a 30-minute timer. One night terror. But it doesn't sound like the ones you played today again i don't feel like those are yeah those are like those are pretty chill you know uh-huh they're sitting up there's a lot of there's a beginning of forming words there's one you no no no no no and i mean it's jarring. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, we'd have the Klonopin. Yeah.

We used to like take sleep hygiene seriously, as they say. We're like, we would read. And now it's just chaos. It's hard to stay in that routine. Sleep hygiene is real tough. I can't. It's the only time I have. I know. I feel like I can see myself doing

that kind of thing for like two weeks and then you're like you know like it just feels very hard because i have friends too that um they do the same kind of routine and they also both always go to bed at the same time and that feels very stressful to me too i couldn't like to be like you know like that's just like i mean especially you're you have late gigs and things like that and sure it's just uh that feels like i would yeah tova goes to bed earlier than he wakes up later three hours just like wide awake you know this episode is brought to you by a real pain from searchlight pictures comes one of the buzziest films at Sundance Film Festival, A Real Pain. Written, directed, and starring Oscar nominee Jesse Eisenberg

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1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca So, yes, so we should talk about Judaism. Because I think, I do want to have your sister on at some point because your sister is still practicing. Though it's like one of those things where it's like, I know your sister could take me being like, what's that? Yeah.

John Marco. They went to London recently. And her sister. Yeah. Wonderful sister Shoshana. She can only use kitchenware that's bathed i have it right it's it's christian baby's blood no and so they got there and they had to take all these pans and knives and a whole kitchen set they had to buy a whole new kitchen set because

if they prepared meat before well yeah so but it's not even just she can't use my grandmother's like kitchenware if you her grandmother is not jewish yeah my mom converted to, she can't use my grandmother's like kitchenware. If you buy. Her grandmother is not Jewish. Yeah. My mom converted to Judaism. And so my mom's family is not Jewish. So her house obviously has not, does not have kosher pots and pans. So if you buy your own pots and pans to use for yourself so that my sister can, my sister, so that she can have things that have not been cooked with non-kosher things, you also

have to do a step where when you first buy it, you have tose it and have you heard of a mikvah no a mikvah is like the ritual bath in judaism so you do that like women do that after they get their finish their period so that they're clean again and like pure for their husbands like it's like and men do it before high holidays but you also do with your pots and pans and a mikvah is like a collection of different different pools than the period the post period i don't think so we're just washing water same pool of water for everything yeah okay i think so maybe there's two sometimes but um but you can do it in like an open body of water so my grandma lives in like rural england there's not a jewish community that there so there's not this ritual bath that has to be specially constructed so my sister bought all these pots and pans and a giant kitchen knife to have because she was there for a month in england yeah with my grandmother and so we went to the

beach and my sister shows up with a bag full of pots and pans and a giant knife and we're at the beach people are playing and frolicking in the beach and she's just like throwing a knife in the water and trying to grab it and spraying. And the videos I have are the funniest thing. We were all dying of laughter because she's so committed to the craft. You're laughing at her. Does it make her go like,

guys, please stop laughing. This is my belief of God. She has a sense of humor and I think she understands the silliness of the situation as well she believes in it she believes it's important the rituals matter but yeah in memphis where my family lives you'd go do it at the synagogue in the bath yeah where it's meant to be you she understands that it's weird to do is there something where you bury the plates that yes but i'm trying to remember.

That's not right. I remember it was an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm. So I was trying to remember. I honestly don't remember. I remember the context of like, Russ was just going to say things he's heard about Jews and be like, true or false? I think it was plates that had been used with like bacon had been on

them or something. You were supposed to bury the plates. And I think for a certain amount of time and the dirt gets it's yeah there's a whole like books and books on like kosher laws it's not just don't eat pork or shellfish there's the minutiae is like for example you're supposed to separate meat and milk meat and dairy you're not supposed to have a cheeseburger but that also means like if you cook mac and cheese in one pot you can't make a brisket in the pot you have to have a separate set of dishes for your meat so then there's things like an onion or like but if you like chop that a vegetable and it's cold on a meat thing you could put it in a dairy thing because it's not transferring anything yeah because it's all cold and it's a vegetable and it's not a meat or a dairy thing. It's parv, which is kind of the neutral.

But an onion is like a more sharp food where it does pick up the flavors. It does transfer. So you can't cut an onion on a meat cutting board and then use it in a dairy thing. Got it. Or with a meat knife. So there's like, it's crazy how. Now where, okay, because I get there's the Old Testament. Yeah.

Is that, that's the Torah. Yeah. What's, what, Where else are these written? Because I hear these rules, and I'm like, well, this isn't all in the Old Testament. What's the next? Is that the number one? And there's number two? Yeah.

So that's the Old Testament. And for any Jews listening, I'm sure I'm going to fuck some of this shit up. I did go to school. I did study this. I'm going to mess up some of it. So come for me in the comments and correct But yeah, so there's the Old Testament the Bible the Tanakh is Torah prophets and Another one writings. Anyways, sorry, that's that's the Old Testament

Okay, and then there's like the prophets, which I think is also like. And the prophets, is that part of what we consider to be the Bible or no? No, I don't think so. Like I have a Bible here. No. Okay. It's separate. But I think Christians also, it says in prophets, it says in blah, blah, blah, you know?

Okay. But then on the Torah part, on the Old Testament, there are initial commentators. One's Rashi, one's Uncle S. It's these guys that will explain certain things. Where it's like, okay, when they said this, this is what it can be explained to. And so we have the first commentaries on the Torah. And then from there, over the generations, these rabbis kind of extrapolated and extrapolated. And that's where the Talmud comes from, if you've heard of that.

Which is, that's the main book where most of the laws are broken out from. And when was the Talmud, when was that one written? Mrs. Rifkin would be so upset with me. The charts I made trying to memorize this, I have no idea. How big is that book? Is it bigger than the Bible? Books and books. Books and books 24 books i don't know 24 books maybe a lot of books oh my god and basically that's why they're always reading it on the train yeah exactly but there's like something like you learn a page of it a day and i think it takes like seven years

is any of it fun and story or is it like a legal textbook? Because I don't know if you've ever read the Bible. I was trying at one point and I believe it's in Leviticus where it starts like truly it's like listing recipes for if you have a boil on your head, make a sacrifice thing. This many cubits by this many

cubits. Sacrifice three goats. And at some point you're like, it feels like you're reading the most dated medical book. Talmud is a legal like law school book or a philosophy or it's it's just kind of like it's it's kind of a transcription of the rabbi sitting around doing this and being like okay but if you have an onion and that's not meat or dairy does that matter and then russell would be like well an onion will pick up the flavors and you'll go oh so may and then it's us discussing and then they kind of have a bottom line of like which opinion do we follow okay so it's a lot of like that sort of thing and there's stuff like that i think you would find interesting like there's sorts of things where it's like what happens if

you get a woman pregnant this or that like there's literally a scenario what do you do there's a scenario where it's like you're working what if you're working on a roof and you fall dick first into a woman and get her pregnant like what area yes and i women there's no way they say dick first though right like what they must when they say and you fall and you fall dick first into a woman uh-huh what is the culmination of the responsibilities towards the child um yeah it's like a little it's like kind of a sing-songy um quality a lot of things would have to happen first why were you fully erect on the roof see you would like it yeah you would like it i think we're reaching the amount that i would enjoy it right here in this

podcast i do think that there's a fun thing of like seeing the origin of like seeing a little bit of the debate on the page is somewhat more interesting than just the rule but by the way that is something to give credit to judaism i do think we're very much look there isn't a bottom line of like what you're supposed to do but there is for the most part, explanation and thought behind it. There's a few rules. I think, I forget exactly many, but there's not that many

where they are ones that have no explanation and those are like the blind faith ones. Like, why do you keep kosher? There is no real reason. There's no real reason other than God told you to. But pretty much like murder and adultery. But they suspect that things like, things about like not even bacon

like we all suspect it's because of how there was health reasons probably and it's nowhere written like could they say you don't eat bacon because you can make up because god made the sick no i i yeah i just go faith yeah what's the word for faith in hebrew emuna emuna um okay so by speaking of kosher we've talked I I've I've convinced you to eat oysters yeah

and then you ate a second oyster on your own accord like later yeah oysters are tough if you're not like oysters are tough if you're

there's such a texture thing for the five oysters I think texture is the whole name of the game well I think it's also for seafood well for me like at this point there's twofold none of it for me is

religious anymore and i guess we should zoom back and say how religious i was but and where i you know what i mean but like you just quoted the whole talmud to us we understand this used to be an important part of your life none of it is like god will get me in trouble it but i think first i like the cultural aspect i like saying I'm Jewish part of being Jewish I don't eat pork or shellfish I think the same way you'd meet a lot of modern Muslims who don't eat pork like to me there's that aspect and then I just grew up not eating it where it I don't look at it and go oh I wish I could have that and seafood smells but it must be frustrating when we went to Hawaii we had one dinner in Hawaii where it was like we ordered two dinners for two and almost everything felt like it wasn't it's very there's

very like honestly ironically where i grew up in new orleans like that's a city where it is extremely hard to navigate because both are so prevalent i felt like hawaii was one of those places where pork and seafood are so prevalent but nine nine times out of ten, all my other shit aside, I can navigate that part of it. I, from an outside perspective, and I'm like, I so desperately, I think there's a frustration of like, please try bacon. Please try pork. And I'm not even, I don't, I hate ham. I've never liked ham. bacon please try pork and i'm not even i don't i hate ham i've never liked ham but like just the ability to just oh if i have a dish and there's bacon uh there's bacon on the dish it's okay to

eat the eggs or if it's if it's something and it's pork broth or or to me there's a feeling of you have this one life and people eat this all the time but Why not? Don't you have foods though that you A couple foods. That you, not for religious purposes, but you don't eat that people have always been like, you gotta try it again. Sure. For me, it's crab or lobster

and I don't mind. You gotta try it though. No, no, no. I've eaten both a bunch of times. But the thing is, it doesn't really do anything for me. So I'm like, it's honestly a waste for me to like, if I'm, you know. Totally fine. I just think if you have the allergies and the kosher, you pick one.

It's my philosophy. But I think it's just a feeling of you tried it, though. And you tried oysters. She tried oysters. I think it's just like, again, it's not like I'm sneaking this into Tova's my philosophy. But I think it's just a feeling of you tried it, though. And you tried oysters. She tried oysters. I think it's just like, and again, it's not like I'm sneaking this into Tova's food yet, but there is a feeling of just like, do you understand what I'm saying? Totally. This like, baby, I want to go out to, we split dishes all the time.

Yeah. Well, I would argue that my cross to bear is Gianmarco not wanting to eat unhealthy food and that's my annoying thing with splitting dishes. And then he goes, we'll go to brunch

and he'll want two different egg dishes and I'm like, what is the point of that? I get one egg dish and one French toast. One bready thing. Yes.

Sorry, I don't eat cake for breakfast. Sorry, I don't eat shrimp for lunch. Yeah. What are you talking about? We can all play this game. don't eat cake for breakfast sorry i don't eat shrimp for lunch yeah what are you talking about um by the speed for yourself is there is there anything in your head and she said and i've said it before on the podcast i thought it was so fascinating that you had animal books where the

pig is crossed out yeah well of all the non-kosher things pigs are like disgusting disgusting it's like they're they're just like the you still feel that to me if i had a piglet would you pet it it's subconscious it's so deep in my subconscious it's like racism it's yes it's like it's like um what's it called um but the by yeah by uh prejudice speciesism no no no no yeah yeah it's just like that you know internal sort of thing where i piglets are really cute and i do recognize that and but but there's that you fight against that first thing to get there it's funny your argument is piglets are so cute that's why you eat them yeah and it's hers but i hate them but that's why it's surprising that it's not just about don't eat them. It's just like they're gross.

Like it must have been. Here's my theory, I guess, based on zero research. We're going Joe Rogan on this. That pigs must have been killing so many people at a certain point in history. And they must have been so goddamn delicious that people would not stop. So the Jews were like, we got to go fucking overdrive. They're bad. Everything about them is wrong from alive to dead.

Because why? If you can't eat the thing, why do you have to do this? A lot of things. Like, there's certain religions where you don't need a cow, but they don't go, like, the cow is awful. They go, the cow is sacred. What if the pig was sacred? No, no, no. Yeah.

It's, like, reviled. It's like the epitome of all that is bad. The piggy boy sketch, she never would have signed it. People could still, you know, people, it was the olden times, people did weird things probably with farm animals too. So they had to be disgusting that was like no, no, you can't just not eat them.

If you fall off the roof into a pig, do you finish? Oh my god. Rabbi Lightstone's never going to invite me to another meal. So I think I've asked you this before, but your mom's not Jewish. She converted. So by your own faith. Sounds like an accusation, not a question.

By your own faith. Gotcha. He would really like the Talmud. Literally. I just love rules. I love rules. No, but you love like loopholes and if your mom is not Jewish,

but convert. Okay, so there's the other thing. We've talked about where during the it's called, what's the date where you can't use electricity? It's from the Shabbos. Shabbos. And that's from, let me see if I get this right, sundown on Friday to sundown on Saturday. Yeah. First, what's sundown?

A little bit dark? No sun. I think it's like before sun. It's 25 hours, so it's like, it's right before sundown. 25? It can't even be 24 just to make it convenient for everybody? Right before the sun goes down. I forget exactly what time on Friday, but then it ends when you see three stars in the sky does it change seasonally as yeah okay so like in winter shabbos ends way earlier and then in the summers

it ends way later and then in places like you know those places in alaska where it never gets dark shabbos is like an obscene lee long it like ends at like midnight or whatever, Saturday night. Wow. Okay, so your mom's not Jewish. My mom wasn't Jewish. And she, and common misconception, she did not convert for my dad. She's a weirdo who. People have been saying.

People have been saying. And I just want to, well, but that's part of it because people do question the validity of conversions. than saying and i just want well but but that's part of it because people do question the validity of conversions and if you if you were like i'm gonna convert for him there's suspicion in the orthodox world of like do you actually want this or do you just want to marry this guy because then we don't because the conversion process is extremely um long and um it's just there's a lot that you have to do and a lot you have to prove and a lot of shit that you have to study it's not just like you don't just dip in the ritual bath and then you're done it's years and years is this for is this is this skepticism shown both ways or is it more towards women converting i think both ways i think you're supposed to turn away potential

converts multiple times and i think there's a certain amount of times we're not like a proselytizing um group like we don't try to convert non-jews we will try if you see the people on the street go are you jewish it's because they want and i used to do that um at tulane but they you would do that to women to two students but yeah i would hand out like shabbat candles to students but you weren't doing the men because the men were doing to the men so they could do the the well women are supposed to the... Well, women are supposed to do that too. Okay. Women are supposed to shake

the Lulav and Esra. It's Sukkot right now. I mean, not when this episode comes out next year, but maybe next Sukkot. You know what? You think maybe... I think the next guy

who does the Are You Jewish? to me would say, I'll do this if you do my podcast. They would do it. They would do it. They want to spread the gospel. What are you going to talk to them the gospel do you speak yiddish

yeah let's do no i have a lot of things i want to talk to him about okay uh but anyways so wait um your mom so so it's not you're supposed to turn them away it's you're really supposed to want it and so my mom really wanted it and she's wanted to be jewish since she was like a kid i don't know why or whatever it's something i always since she was like a kid i don't know why or whatever it's something i always took for granted as a kid i'm like yeah i'm unconverted and then as you become an adult you're like why would you pick this some people feel that i i've known people who are like i feel jewish yeah yeah it's but but i also think there are people like that that don't go full monty towards because there's yeah there's like there's a lot of denominations but the main are like reform judaism conservative judaism and

orthodox judaism and orthodox is like at by the book all the rules conservatives kind of like a i don't want to misspeak but it's a midi thing it's like you do a lot of the same things reforms a little bit more um in spirit like it's more about like making the world better and it's less it's less about do you consider yourself reformed jewish now what are what would you say i don't know i think i align with conservative judisms like the the traditional like for example i went to like the conservatives dobbin if i have to start telling people that i'm dating a conservative different from that when i go to a conservative like prayers it's the same it's like this but men and women are sitting together and the food's not necessarily all certified kosher but maybe you don't eat meat or like non-kosher meat whatever it is yeah um reform

i went to reform russia shana service the drummer from the yeah yeah yes was in the band and they chanted bob dylan lyrics that's the difference you know what i mean tova and i she we went to a shabbat dinner and unfortunately i can't do that many because it's during stand-up. It's prime time. And we went to one in Brooklyn. And after the Jewish prayers, they then read the astrology charts for the month. And then they passed around a tray of MDMA. And she was like, this is conservative Judaism. It's a little looser.

So that's what you'd i don't know i think i like i don't do it consistently enough to really feel that reform i think is like that's too that's too far away it's too loosey-goosey for me when the bob how are you not loosey-goosey though we're pretty just the fact that she still does some kosher things she still celebrates i want to sing the songs yeah it's like i feel like it's like you would say the reformed person for christianity would be like they go christmas eve and that's it really for once a year for like you know what i mean or it's not even that it's like and it's like they go once a year and it's it's mariah Carey. Yes. Is their, is their church service. Yeah. You know what I mean? So.

So, okay. So my mom converted and so then she, she went to UNC and she was already like hanging out at the Hill house, which is the Jewish, you know, group on campus. That's where she met my dad.

And my dad didn't really care. I don't think so much about being religious I think he did ultimately want to date someone Jewish because his dad's a Holocaust survivor so they met while she was still exploring but she hadn't converted yet and so they actually got married three times to each other famously the first time they got married just like civilly so they could get student housing and she wasn't Jewish yet. Then she went through the conservative conversion process. So that was still intense and still required a lot of studying, but not the most extreme group.

And I think my parents were worried that if she didn't do it all the way, there would be people who are Jewish that would not consider her Jewish to be Jewish. So they didn't want that to be an issue because Judaism is matrilineal, which means if my dad wasn't Jewish, my mom was, we would still be Jewish by birth. Wait. If your mom, you know, your mom, your mom is Jewish. Your dad's not. But Jews would not consider you half Jewish. Jews would, there is no half Jewish in like orthodoxy. But if it was just my dad, they would not.

Correct. But are there, is there any, I was about to say strain of Judaism. And I don't think we should use the word strain. Is there any sect of Judaism that would not consider you a Jew? Maybe ultra, ultra Orthodox. Is that a real term? Two ultras? Yeah.

Or are you just saying like really? Like ultra-Saxon. Yeah, like really, really. And then a lot of Sephardi, which are like, I'm going to fuck up what Sephardi is, but it's like Middle Eastern Jews. It's like Iran, it's Syria.

I don't know what to say. Sephardi,, but it's like Middle Eastern Jews. It's like Iran, it's Syria. I don't know what to say. Sephardi, that was the sound cue I was playing earlier. Don't mark it. It's a different type of... It's kind of like European versus Middle Eastern, if that makes sense. And so those Jews, like Persian Jews, Syrian, they have a lot of issues with conversion in their communities.

They're not really about conversion. Uh-huh. But then my dad was worried that, like, yeah, if we don't go all the way, then there are people that it's going to create problems down the line for us. And he was worried about that. And so my mom, I'm the the oldest my mom was already pregnant with me and converted again orthodox while she was pregnant with me now do you want to do a talmudic exercise there's three types of jews level wise there's the regular jews about to ask like how if you were conceived because of the roof situation that's how there's regular jews and then there's like the the levium who like worked in the temple

and they had a higher slightly higher status and then there were the kohanim and they were the priests and they did everything in the in the jewish temple back in the day if you ever met someone whose last name is like cohen or cats they're descendant from like that level immediately thought of cat cohen and lewis cats because yes they are that's no joke like they're that's and so they're special and like it's passed down and every holiday like they say a special prayer of the kohanim and those jews are not allowed to marry converts divorcees or um I forget the third one. They're not allowed? Like Cat Cohen?

Her dad. The dads. The men. The men. Because that's by the man. Keep up. Well, here's the thing with Judaism, because I know Russell is absorbing even less than I am,

and I'm barely there. No, I'm- It's one of those things I'm like, I'm there. I'm like, I got there. I'm, I'm, is that like, it's one of those things I'm like, I'm there, I'm like, I got it. I got it. Conservative, modern, orthodox,

and then the next level, it gets deeper and deeper and deeper. Don't you recognize that like, just in life, you're like,

like you know people of all the levels, don't you? Do you know what I mean? Like it makes sense to me because I'm like, I see Hasidic Jews, you see,

you know, I know that you're more into it than like my aunt who's Jewish who doesn't do anything really so do you know what I mean? Like you just know

Your aunt's in law No my so my dad's brother married a Jewish woman Yes So your aunt's in law I call her my aunt Yeah Matt

I'm not saying what you call her I'm saying I was trying to figure out if you had any Jewish in you. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. No, no, no, no. So basically, like, so that group of men, the Kohanim, they're elevated.

So they don't want to dirty their blood with, like, divorced women or converts. Like, that's gross to them and so then when i was spending a year in israel after high school i asked a rabbi i was like well i was conceived technically by orthodox standards not jewish because my mom had converted conservative but it wouldn't hold by the orthodox courts uh-huh i was conceived there are courts the baston you don't go to court you go to like a jewish court if you have a dispute with a neighbor or like whatever and so yeah we like hate the government we stay away um if i was conceived technically not jewish by your standards

but i was born by the time my mom gave birth to me she had converted orthodox i was conceived jewish i mean i was born jewish can i marry a cohan who can't marry converts and so that caused like a ruckus in my school because the rabbis were like oh uh i have to look into this and i think the answer is no and wait how old were you at this point 18 because i was like ready for marriage then it's like uh it's like a math so i truly was like so for marriage then. It's like a math problem. So I truly was like. So you were basically like, hey, I'm about to fuck. Can I fuck these guys?

Yeah. Did you have a Cohen or a Katz in mind? I think I was just like. That's funny. Cohen comes in and he's like, you don't need to worry about this too much. We're just hanging out. We're just friends. We're casual. I'm just curious.

I just want to ask the rabbi if it's okay. There's a lot of stuff like that because you also have to get genetic testing to make sure you're not you don't have taste acts so you really i with my ex-boyfriend like we got genetic testing done because and it is kind of like no no i'm just i just want to know for myself that's how i know when tova's like you should do 23 and me yeah i'll be like okay here we well the good thing is because my mom converted my blood my gene pool is healthier so i didn't have any i wasn't a carrier for anything because i have a lot of strong non-jewish so a couple questions when you and your boyfriend at the time yeah when you got tested do you get tested because you were really considering it or is it like a how how long which boyfriend is this okay okay but how long

how long where does he live for a year and a half a year and a half and how deep in the relationship where did you get probably like under a year i mean in this world a year is like tiktok did you and i think in the regular world two years is nothing i know about the testing how how when you got the results were you like all right he was a carrier for something he was yeah it wasn't but i wasn't so it would have been fine what what is there a specific kind of thing what would you call it a lot of different there's taste acts as the main one what's taste x it's a genetic mutation or to like if two parents are carriers for taste acts the chances of your child having taste acts which is, if you're a carrier,

it doesn't mean you have it. Sure, sure. But like, it's a really debilitating, like horrible disease that your child will die young and all these sorts of things. So if you're both carriers, so when we got tested, he was a carrier for not that, but something else. And do you, I imagine that if we were to look up the history that when, what's it called, Tay-Sachs? Yeah. And do you I imagine that if we were to look up the history that when what's it called say sacks?

Yeah, that after like taste I speak him a big problem the conversion rules got a little bit looser Cuz we had to we had to add a little more to the little more water to the pool I mean that but that's exactly what it's a lot of inbreeding I mean, did you talk to him about like what was that conversation like when you're like? We were like, sorry, baby or carrier like a carrier. Like, what? No, but because I was free and clear. I was, we were golden. But now that he knew he's a carrier. He would have to, he's married now.

I'm sure his wife also got tested. But like, do they have at this point, do they have like a dating app where like, you know, you can put it in? I mean, you might as well. Let's call him up. Do you say it on the first date before you sleep? Is it like an STD? Just so you know, I carry Tase app. The way that in

regular colleges they talk about like get tested for stds and that's like the thing that like the health center is trying to push we were pushed get genetic testing done because everyone already has herpes from the rabbit yeah oh my god um okay um so so i think i'm always amazed and we've kind of had this conversation many times and this is where like where i get confused why i want to have your sister on on on the podcast because there's like certain rules that are so wildly inconvenient that like what what's the show your sister wanted to see this This feels like a really perfect example. And I want your truth. Not the polite version.

The role-eyed version. What you think of this scenario. So there was this off-Broadway play that, I forget what it was, it was Suss, it was Suss, Shannon Taub Show, and Philippa Soo was in it from Hamilton. My sister's obsessed with Hamilton. And I had just gotten a raise,

and I'm like, and my sister loves musical theater. I'm like, I'm gonna get us tickets to Suft's. Amazing, blah, blah, blah. I got us tickets. And then, I don't think he's gonna think it's crazy because y'all have Lent. It's Lent. It's our Lent, but it's a little more intense.

Basically between- Don't say y'all to appeal to his between passover and then another holiday i'm sure you've never heard of called shavuos you're absolutely right there's 49 days that's a period of mourning because there's this one rabbi whose students it's a lot of what all it is a lot of days. Oh, 40. Yeah. Oh, so it's 49. Yeah.

Okay. I don't like this line comparison. You give a one thing for Lent, and most people, it's like fucking nothing. So it's this period of mourning because some rabbi students fought, and they all died of a plague. And so for 49 days, we mourn. And there's a lot of things you can't do. And one of them is you're not supposed to listen to live music or entertainment. That's why acapella is so popular in Jewish culture because there's no instruments.

Oh, it can't have instruments. It can't have instruments. For that time period. For that time period. Because it's like you're like. What the instruments do. It's just too happy. It's too jovial.

It's too like. But like that could be a mood where someone's like trying to get into Juilliard. But like every 49 days he like can't practice. Well, it's not every 49. It's just 49 days once a year. It's just 49, but like that could be a mood where someone's like trying to get into Juilliard, but like every 49 days he like can't practice every 49. It's just 49. It's just 49. Once a year. But is there other time periods where there's other things that are like that? Yeah.

There's the, the, um, the nine days is also how many days a year you can't, you can't do it during the Shabbos 58 days. And then Shabbos you can't. Yeah. So then that's 52,

104, but some of those overlap. That's a lot of days. So, okay. So basically, on Shabbat and on the holidays, you can't use electricity. Of course, my sister can't go to a show on Saturday. It's Shabbos. You can't go to a concert.

But this was like a random Wednesday, not on a holiday, but it fell in this period of 49 days and you had bought the tickets I bought the tickets and she forgot she was like it's the Omer which is this time period it's the Lent and she was like shoot I forgot I can't go and I was even I was like

really like because I get Shabbat I get the holidays this is like, this is, and also we have a secondary to the Shabbat is, is just makes sense, but this does not. Well,

I think it's also like there are varying levels of rules, like different people have levels. Like some people will listen to music that's recorded on the radio, but not go to a concert. Some people will only listen to acapella music period and not see it. So there's, there's gradients. That is tough. To imagine that you have

to listen to only acapella music for 50 days is very upsetting to me. Someone's really committed. They're doing this and they're like, I'm ready. What, acapella?

What's that one group that does it? The Maccabees? Pentatonix. Oh, Pentatonix. I like Pentatonix a lot. About 49 days of Pentatonix in a row would be, you know. The Maccabees? Pentatonix. Oh, Pentatonix. Which I like Pentatonix a lot. See, about 49 days of Pentatonix in a row would be, you know. You're just going to sing one of the lines?

See, but Gianmarco, Gianmarco. Wait, wait. You haven't heard. Okay, so now what happens? So your sister goes. So I go, ooh, is there any loophole? And this is where, like, consulting your rabbi comes in. Because, again, like I said, there's levels to it.

This is not cut and dry, yes or no. is why jews are so good with taxes by the way we've been looking for loopholes our whole god damn life so i was like tell the rabbi that you're spending time with your not religious sister and you can try and use this as an opportunity to get me back and like oh and at the end of the day so So really, really mendacious shit. And your sister's like, okay. She asks the rabbi, because she wants to see it, of course. And she's like, I can't go. And she didn't go.

And I'm like, oh, I'm sorry. It would have been really funny if he said, you can go, but you have to be blindfolded and plug your ears the whole time. But you can technically be there. You have to wash the playbill in an open ocean before you read it but sometimes i'm sure the rabbi says yes yeah and the question is it's kind of rabbi you doctor hopping doctor shopping yeah trying to find the answer you want people say don't rabbi hop like that's the thing that they say is like you have to have your guy so i look at this and i look at like the myriad of rules and the myriad of books and the different levels and the bending and the plying.

And I go, how do any of you take this seriously at all? Yeah, but John Marko, I don't see it as any different than like a Lent or like it's more strict. No, no, no. It's hugely more strict. Or like, it's more strict. No, no, no. It's hugely more strict. Here's a game I like to play is like, name a task and I will tell you a rule associated with it.

Or like, literally as mundane as tying your shoes, I will tell you what a rule. And that's why I think sometimes this rule stuff, I'm like, does it feed into, you don't want to talk about, is there like some ocd thing going on that the enjoyment of these rules but i i see things like there was this and we had talked about it where your sister the plane was delayed uh so so and she was visiting your family and she had to wait four days or whatever because she couldn't fly for the two days for shabbat and i think there's a feeling of like if it was my sister or my brother i I'd say, just get on the fucking plane. Victoria, Victoria, it's fine. You're not going to be the first Jew that kind of broke a rule.

And what's amazing about these rules is unlike Christians who are looser with the rules but have hell or heaven, Jews don't seem to really have there's no point system because everyone must fuck up now and then and then they go to the rabbi and they go i'm sorry that's what like repentance like like russia shun us for and kipper sure so why not just go to the play and repent that's what christians do it must be worth it to have the like for them it must be worth it listen i'm not i'm not i'm but i it's so impossible for me to put myself in in that in that perspective but what are your views people must love those rules do you mean like or or they feel or they're or as we saw in the recent new york times article which tova shared where where there's these schools hasidic a funded school they're funded by the state

and they don't teach them anything. So they go, well, fuck, I can't leave this. All I know is you're not going to trick me to say anything bad. Not like the Jews. Orthodox Jews. I'm saying religion in general. I think all the rules are silly.

I think there's a few things. I think, first of all, when you're born into into it for me like when i was on my way out there were a couple times where like i kind of felt the same way like you have to understand you're in this world where when you're nine years old and you're learning all these rules you go i can't do all this i'm evil and i you start your life like that like you start the for me i started my I started my life being like, to your point, I'm a bad person. I can't remember how to tie my shoes the correct order. And I can't remember this blessing by heart. Like I'm already starting at negative.

Like I'm fucked. What is this? You know? So I agree. I think it's, it's that, but when you're born into it and you don't know anything else, I mean, it's so insular. I think that's why it's insular. Cause they don't want you to see how much fun everyone else is having. But doesn't it, don't know anything else i mean it's so insular i think that's why it's insular because they don't want you to see how that's why doesn't it bother you but doesn't don't you see it

now don't you see a family member uh i but i think for me four out of five of my siblings aren't religious my parents have chilled out my sister's not doing this because anyone's forced her to my sister's not doing this because she has to so for for me, I'm like, she does find the value in the community and those sorts of things. If it's worth it for her, who cares? That's how I feel. But don't you worry that sometimes within this community, we find out about problems that are deeper. For example, the schools. So you're in the community, and then you have a kid, and they're not trained for life.

I think my sister's not in those communities, first and foremost. She's going to be an accountant. What's different about you and her that you left? I grew up in the Hasidic world and my sister grew up in the modern Orthodox world. We're 10 and a half years apart and my childhood was Chabad and her childhood was Memphis, which is modern Orthodox. She had a much healthier relationship with the secular world to be able to she wore pants and short sleeves growing up you know what i mean like she wore

bikini to the beach she became more religious because she had it wasn't she didn't have what i just described rego you're evil if you don't remember like my teacher told me that every time you say a word of prayer an angel goes up to heaven heaven. But if you mess up a word, it's a deformed angel. So you're just like that. It's that sort of shit. It still goes to heaven, though? Just like making heaven uglier? Just flying like in a diagonal.

Is that a real rule or just that teacher just kind of said that? It's the same way they teach. Like Catholic school, like guilt and lore. It's funny, though. Catholic is usually like you will burn in hell. Jews are just about guilt. And someone else, they're going to be upset. And so I genuinely think that's the difference is I grew up in a much more intense community and then my parents moved.

And in Memphis, it's a much more pick and choose, find your lane type of Judaism, Orthodox Judaism. You know? Well, I want to get to this yeshiva boys thing. Before I go, because we're going to have you back. I think we'll have you back with your sister. Okay. You think she's down? Yeah, I think she is down.

Okay. No, it would be fascinating. I just don't want to be me It's one of those things Where I want to be Sure I think I'll be there To mediate

And I think she's also Like my sister also Your sister's She's funny I wouldn't bring on If I didn't think Your sister was like Hold her own

She holds her own She's extremely funny She's smart It was just interesting When we went out To dinner once And we were talking About the kosher

We went to a kosher restaurant And we were talking Just about how One place was kosher And one wasn't and it's because the rabbi you know they've helped him or they gave him some money or they did a favor she was basically like expressing how it is like not a it's a very broken corrupt system yet at the same time we had to eat at the kosher restaurant and it's one of these things where i sometimes get confused how can you know that it's not a real system but you you're like, I'll still do it anyway. I think that goes back to when I was trying to leave

multiple times. I'm like, well, I want to go out on a Friday night. And then I'm like, well, who am I going to go out with? This was the whole world. I didn't have non-Jewish friends. I didn't have non-Jewish coworkers. I went to Jewish schools, camps, synagogues, play dates, everything, up through college, up through my first job

was at the Orthodox Union of Congregations of America. Like, every piece of this world was this. There was no... You know what I mean? They designed it to be that way. So even if you think some things are silly or like, oh, that's annoying or like that's corrupt, there's corruption in comedy.

There's corruption in this. Of course. I think it's frustrating. I also feel a certain degree of guilt where, you know, I know like Shabbat dinner is a big thing for you. And I think there's this feeling of I'm like, fuck, man, I'm never really going to be able to like do that with you. For sure. Like there will be like, what, twice a year other than the other Fridays I i have to take off like it's just it's rare yeah you know and there's a bit of a bummer i'm like god damn it what a shitty position for sure that that it's it's in and i

think like in the beginning of our relationship i definitely like that was a struggle for me because i also don't think i had those people. And I think in the last couple of years, I've cultivated a community of friends that I do these things with that, you know, of course it's like, it's how to, how do you integrate two lives? Like what's important?

Like those big picture things, you know, you think about if people were to have a family one day, theoretical people would have a family one day. Like theoretical people were to have a family one day, like, how would those children be raised, and how much would these things, and so, of course, there's, like, that looming thing, but I don't over, like, I've gotten accustomed

to that kind of, like, this is my thing, if that makes sense. Do you, and you've spent enough time with my mother now, like, do you consider, I'm Jewish. Yeah. But, like, how do you perceive my Jewishness? Because I've said it before where I had this teacher in college. It was the first time I really felt upset where it was my friend.

He didn't mean, you know, I said, oh, he didn't invite me to eat. This Jewish teacher had a big, all the Jewish holidays, he had big meals. And it was like epic meals with this cool teacher. And I was never invited. And I went to my friend and he said, well, he only invites the Jewish students. And I was like, I'm Jewish. And he was like, no, not really. And I do think there is like a, there's a degree where I don't know, especially with comedy.

Like, of course, like I lean on the Jewishness because it's fun to play with. And it's like the joke is the edgy joke I can make. And being with you has certainly made me feel like I'm more Jewish by proxy. Well, I think, I think even you aside, growing up, I've redefined what the Jewish identity is for myself. Not just you, but other Jews. Because I had to confront that when I left the Jewish community and I met other Jews who were half Jewish on their dad's side that considered themselves Jewish. And it's that same gut sort of thing where I had to fight the instinct to be like, you're not Jewish. And like, you know what I mean?

But like for real. And I think growing up i was like oh my dad's jewish and i see you're like yeah oh that's that's cool um but i think like when i was i remember distinctly when i was little there was a a deli uh kosher cajun it's like one of the two kosher restaurants in new orleans and a lot of the like gift shop area of this restaurant because it's like a grocery store and they like cute sort of like oy vey yiddishism type americana jewish references and because i grew up in my world that's not my version of judaism you know what i mean the like boobie in the schvitz and the deli meat. Like that's not how my Judaism was. And the same way people are like, oh, you're so Jewish. Did you go on birthright?

I'm like, no, I'm so Jewish. I spent a year learning Torah in Jerusalem. Like, you know, like, oh, bat mitzvahs. What was your theme? I'm like, no men. Like it's my Judaism. That's so funny. You know, like.

That's so fucking funny. You know, like separate seating. Like it's, I didn't have a basketball. I didn't go to a single basketball team. Bar Mitzvah. I went to Hasidic dancings in like banquet halls. And like, so as I've left the community and then met more Jews of varying degrees or,

or entry points i have started to embrace the like judaica judaism which is like the oh they on schlepp in here mahjong like that and so i think like but even before i met you and your mom like i've grown to love and identify with that as part of figuring out what i identify with and like what i find cultural touchstones to it's it's that like the jake cohen's of the world like the chef like i think there would have been a version of me just for listeners to listen to the episode but like i think there's there would have been a version of me even like six years ago where i'd be like he cooks with bacon and he calls himself a Jewish chef. Like how?

No. And I'm so, I'm so thankful I never met judgmental Jewish Tova because some of the things she says, I'm like, Oh God. But you know what I mean? And now I'm like Jake Cohen. Like I, I am so excited that there's like modern chefs that are doing it from a Jewish heritage and putting a spin on these classics and making savory babkas and making it palatable. And like there's been this uptick of like Jewish themed restaurants, not just like Katz's, but Edith's or, you know, there is this one place I went to an SNL after party.

Not to brag. But it was like everything in the menu was like latke or like it was like high end jewish food matzo ball soup but like elevated and now i found like a real appreciation and love for that because that is kind of where where i'm at now where i'm not that anymore yeah so when i find like you know your mom's from great neck that's so jewy you know, your mom's from Great Neck. That's so Jew-y. You know what I mean? And like, I also didn't grow up in the tri-state area. So a lot of like Northeast Jewery, I learned when I got here. And I've now added to my identity as I strip away other parts. So like, I do think in many, many ways you are so extremely Jewish.

And then like in my version of Judaism, not at all. You know what I mean? Sure. I wish I'd grown up with more. We're having Danny Jalas this week. Not Jewish at all. I'm kidding. But I didn't have any other neurotic Jewish kids my age.

I wish I had because I feel like my neuroses was very singular where I didn't have anyone to like relate to on that level. We had a lot of Jews. I went to a lot of apartments, but they all played soccer. They all were doing athletics. Yeah. And I was like,

what is this? Um, we didn't have Jews really upstate New York. He's like, do you remember, do you remember the first time that someone was like, someone introduced yourself and you're like, Oh my God,

that's the Jew. No, no. Cause I, I wasn't aware cause of my aunt. Uh, and then like there was like, then my cousins kind that's the Jew? No, because I was aware because of my aunt. My cousins kind of dabbled. But, you know, it wasn't like,

you know, there was of course, but not like... How many times are you going to ask me that? Until I see it, Russell. So let's... We only have a little bit of time, but I do want to talk about this new burst.

Have you heard of? Miami Boys Choir? The Miami Boys Choir. No. Okay, so this has recently been. Now, is this because of the acapella thing that these groups exist? No, these groups have full, like,

if Jewish music's not acapella, it's they love a saxophone. That's the one other thing you have to know about Jewish music, is they love a brass band and they love a saxophone. So I grew up listening to a lot of Jewish music. Yeshiva Boys Choir is my band of choice. It's exactly, we picture, 50 young boys. What do you picture?

50? What do you think, Russell? I did not picture 50. I pictured 17 young boys. What do you picture? 50? What do you think, Russell? I did not picture 50. I pictured 17 young boys. I guess I actually pictured them in like church robes. Like I pictured Christians. So it's like kippahs. It's kippahs, yarmulkes, and they're wearing like shiny vests.

And these are all prepubescent boys. They're singing high. And so I listened to Yeshiva Boys Choir, but there's also Miami Boys Choir. Those are the two huge Jewish groups. That's the music you could always listen to. And I guess Miami Boys Choir started a TikTok channel. Oh. And they started showing up on my feed.

But TikTok's algorithm knows you. It's like if you're into cats, you'll get cat material, whatever. So TikTok knows I'm Jewish. It's been knowing I'm jewish i'm like of course i was the one tiktok you just sent me recently that you got about the wife oh like looking into the phone no oh the one about like being submissive to your to your man is not necessarily a bad thing and you're like how did i get here yeah yeah yeah i got like a homemaking stay-at-home mom christian tiktok that's like sometimes i'll get you know what i get get a lot is like two twin sisters are one of them. No, no, no more.

No, we don't. The husband slaps the one on the butt and it's like the twin sister. You ever see this? Oh, it's like fake prank stuff? I've seen that like video like three times different. Like, yeah, it's like fake prank videos. Yeah. But that one in particular is a weird niche.

Wait, wait, what is that one in particular? Well, it's like there's like two sisters that are like talking. One's pretending to be the other. And then she's like, I'm going to go to the other room. And she like leaves the other room. And then the husband comes in and is like, whoa. And he like spanks the twin. And it's like, it's not me.

It's not me. And she goes, and then the other sister comes in and is like, that's my sister. And it's like all like clearly, you know, I hate fake pranks. So, but I also always watch a full fake prank. Me too. And I. You're lying. Do you get the ones where they make the food in like stupid ways? Yes. I hate fake pranks but I also always watch a full fake prank me too and I do you get the ones where they make the food

in like stupid ways they like put hot dogs in cake batter and then put 40 eggs on top or they do the thing like they're gonna scare someone and they're like oh the scary ones

are the worst because they do it and they do it because of the Facebook algorithm where they need it to hit 10 minutes so they go like yes

yes yes yes and it's like to the point of insanity and I know it's and you can't and I watch it it's what's it called where they need it to hit 10 minutes. So they go like, yes. Yes, yes, yes. And it's like to the point of insanity. And I know it's, and you can't, it's what's it called where you put invest? What is it? Where you invest, you think, I've invested so much, I'll keep going.

Oh yeah, sunken cost fallacy. Sunken cost fallacy. Yes, yes, yes. There's something, I think it should be called like an attention sunken cost fallacy or time where you really, you're like, I have to see whatever the fucking scare is. Even though you know the acting is going to be terrible.

whatever's coming at minute 36. So this is, so, so, so then I started getting texts from people out, so then Miami Boys Choir started showing on my feed.

Let's play, let's take a, so this is Miami Boys Choir. So yeah, that's Miami Boys Choir. And they've gone mega viral on TikTok. And it's this weird, it is this weird cognitive dissonance where it's so part of my life. But it's like someone discovering a K-pop band. Yeah. And the whole TikTok, everyone's talking about them. And yeah, it's like someone discovering a k-pop band yeah and the whole tick tock everyone's

talking about them and yeah it's just this weird i can't explain it but it's just it's it i like cried because i don't know it was just like my life is so separate from the way my life was in many ways that this conflation of the two it like sometimes is like very emotionally intense yeah where you're like wait you know about that and you're liking it and like because my friends if you've asked them for years i mean you asked if i asked you like what's toba's favorite band all my friends non-jewish like not religious would go yeshiva boys choir like it's a running joke that i don't have good taste she has a pillow and she has a blanket with these little boys on it. Max Ash got me for my birthday a blanket of their album cover. And it's like 50 little boys on it.

But it's like a joke, you know? But it's not, though. But it's also not. But you like it, yeah. But I think it was so validating that the internet's like, wait, this slaps? And I'm like, yeah, it is K-pop. It is this like earworm, itchy music that's like high intensity like big big. I don't know how to describe music Yeah, like oh, yeah

Here's here's your Shiva boys Like this is Do you hear the saxophone? Wait, let's hear the first voice start singing. I don't know what the copyright rules are. Oh yeah, like 11 seconds or something. But let's just see. We'll see if we'll come back and there'll be boys singing. I'm very, like,

I still am very confused by, like, how these entities exist because the boys age out of them. And so I'm just like, new boys. Yeah, you get new boys. But what's the,

who's running this? Menachem Begin runs. What's the person's name? Okay, so I think, I know. Ellie Gerstner runs the Yeshiva Boys Choir and Menachem Begin runs Miami Boys Choir. I spent a summer at camp with Ellie Gerstner's sister once

and I thought she was like, oh my God, she knows someone famous. Her brother runs Yeshiva Boys Choir. Oh my God. Have you ever seen them live? No. Do they perform they perform now would you go to that with us because we're talking about music here's what i think is so

funny because the people that the places and the people that they perform this for are so deeply religious like it's like black and it's like black and white clothing it's that tight it's not modern it's like oh so they're not gonna be like but now that they've become famous on tiktok i really imagine there are tiktok girlies that'll be like we went now that they've become famous on TikTok, I really imagine there are TikTok girlies that'll be like, we went to the Sheba Boys Choir, Miami Boys Choir concert. And these audience members are going to be so pissed that they're all these girls. Think of it like Hasidic Jews next to like little girls. And then like TikTok girlies in tank tops and being like taking pictures.

Do they perform like. Be real of Miami Boys Choir. Yeah. Do they perform across the country or are they just in Miami? Like. No, they're. I don't even know why they're called Miami Boys Choir. Yeah. Do they perform across the country or are they just in Miami? No, I don't even know why they're called Miami Boys Choir at this point.

They're like in New York but they're playing in Lakewood, New Jersey soon. I think this week. Tomorrow. But again, I would make us wear full garb.

Like I'm not showing up not fitting in. You know what I mean? Wait, what is that for me? What would that be for men? Black pants, white button down and a kippah. Are you serious? Yeah. You're serious I mean? Wait, what is that for me? What would that be for men? Black pants, white button down and a kippah. Are you serious? Yeah. You're serious. Maybe a polo.

If we go to this, I have to wear... Maybe a polo. I have to wear a kippah? A hundred percent. Oh, baby. That's tough. Why? Would you wear a kippah? But also we'd probably... Would you tell him to wear a kippah? We'd probably have to... Shut the fuck up. What'd he say? He said k Keepa hardly even know us. Would you tell him to wear a Keepa? Yeah. We'd probably have to...

Shut the fuck up. What'd he say? He said, Keepa hardly even know us. How dare you? I also think we'd probably just sit separately. Oh. This is like when I went to go meet her family, and it's like, oh, I'm finally going to meet her family.

The first thing we do is fucking separate for half the trip. What if it's like a Friday night, dawn, evening. So would you go to this? Yeah. Okay. I don't think you like that kind of music. I do like shitty anime pop. I thought it was going to be like...

What did you think? Go for it. I was thinking like gospel. Do you know what I mean? I was thinking religious music. Yeah, oh, wait. No, but you don't hear religious music, and I picture something more serious or, like, not gospel's not the right term.

I was picturing, like, religious singing in church, not this. I know what you mean. Wailing, a little wailing. I was thinking maybe, like, but this is more like, this is sister act. This is, like, when it's, we're getting fun. Hey, there's a movie. Yeah. I think there should be a show.

I have a show pitch. Make a documentary of I think there should be I have a show pitch make the documentary of these guys wait I have a pitch that's like Matis Yahoo meets meets Yeshiva Boys Miami Boys Choir

the pitch is someone's deal is to make it a show where they it's there's a one to one for a while of it but like they get viral

on TikTok they're in this secluded community they end up going on all the Today shows whatever they become a superstar like matis yahoo became a real star and then it is grappling with their world and this fame like

matis yahoo's not religious anymore but he started off in the black hat and the coat and everything and was singing about the messiah and god and all the shit and was spreading this message and he was the he we were like oh my god we have a pop star and he's religious. So I think there is a show of the downfall of this group of boys. Religious, yeah. Now that you talked about it helping one's career, I'm starting to understand why. I think you should make a documentary about these kids and then you have the IP and then you turn that into a movie. You should make a documentary. You love this kind of thing.

Do it on the two of them. Do it on the post. Because I'm more interested in these kids, then they become 13, 14, and then they leave this group. This isn't a career. There's so many groups like that. But it's not a career right now.

But it's not a career for them either. But now they're going to be selling out. And it's going to be one of those things where I'm like, well, where's this money going? I will say the acapella group in my college, the Maccabeats, if you've heard of them. The Maccabeats. The Maccabeats is an acapella group where it's like, oh, people graduate and then you get new members. But my year was the year that they did, I spin my dreidel.

Like, I flip my lacas in the air sometimes, singing ayo, spin the dreidel. This song went so viral that now the maca beats is no longer a student acapella group and they did become that group and they are still performing but it was when i was in college with them this group's been around for a long time but that version of it yeah left and we're like we're gonna capitalize on this so that does happen well we're gonna go see them and we'll do our next episode after that um uh we we do have to uh wrap it up um uh let's just do quick quick uh quick blessings really quick just to wrap this up see i got i got put on this last minute oh sorry

oh my god listen could i get a fucking you run the board for now on you better count your blessings. I want to get a Yeshiva Boys Choir version of the Downside theme song. That would be fun. Oh, my God. Blessing. You got a blessing? Very quick, too.

I had a really nice day date with Nicole onicole on saturday because she was house sitting and she was staying in brooklyn and uh but it was like nice it was like it felt like we were like dating again you know when you're like yeah it was like because we weren't staying and it was like we only could like go out and wander it was really it was a really fun day and then the second thing is um oh the cure released new music they haven't released new music since 2008 so i'm very excited uh that they didn't put it out on spotify yet but i'm like they just started touring again and some new songs are trickling out and i'm excited um okay i have to listen to you i always give all your music i give you i give it a shot like it's better if i do it with you i think like

and also i don't think you'd be into the. You think it would be better with you going like, this part right here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll explain like backstory stuff. No, no, no. But I don't think you'd be into The Cure. But there's a lot of things. Well, we might be doing shrooms. I mean, we might be.

We're doing them. We've got to find them. This Saturday. I took off the night, so we're doing shrooms this Saturday. That's for sure. You don't have them yet, though. No, but it's not like a rare. We have six days.

And maybe I feel like it's going to be like, let's try to listen to some of Russell's music. And maybe when we're so fucked up, we'll see what the value is. I'll send you a shroom playlist. Send me a shroom playlist. We'll listen to it. Okay. My blessing.

Jeffrey Asmus, he suggested when we did that oh that was douglas was the guest he made a joke about how uh modest yahoo would be good for uh love making music and uh good good advice tova what's your wow i had one and i just forgot it it was about you but oh well it was sort of about you um uh i'm alert can i say about it'll be our anniversary will pass by then probably but i have another thing i forgot to add in my allergy list is that i'm allergic to earrings except for titanium so i can't even wear pure gold and there's this one brand of earrings that makes um earrings with titanium backs and then gold plated the rest so it's the only brand of earrings i could wear i love them i'll always buy pairs and my blessing is that john marco is a nice little influencer boyfriend and i uh crafted a

message for him to dm the brand being like it's our anniversary you're the only brand my girlfriend wears here's a picture of us from this wedding where she's wearing these earrings can can we do a collab and they're sending three pairs of earrings wow in exchange for like a tiktok and i'm so excited and john mark excited to do content i love we're gonna i came up with the the creative which is like this will come out after the 26th where it is like she's allergic to everything kind of like we're going on our date we have to like take the cilantro up but not the earrings like something like along those lines oh that's good i'll do i'll do a nicer blessing we did yoga and i'm sure it's so gross to everyone outside but we do yoga and like when we fall in our like corpse pose we always like kind of sort of hold hands or sort of a

little hand touch yeah or a little i'm sure if like i always get nervous like when i like with you when there's like a leg over and I like kind of push you that someone's going to be like, that man is harassing that woman. Well, he was doing, the yoga teacher thought it was funny. He like kicked his leg over and like kicked me

and she was like, hi, like. The bar for you was very low. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's. And then, you know, my toxic trait, I was like,

he's flirting with her. He's making her laugh. He's kicking me's flirting with her. He's making her laugh. He's kicking me to pull her there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was me being like, bitch, back off. This is the downside. One, two, three. Downside.