The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #149 Dodging Oxygen Tank Cords with Drew Lynch

Episode Date: July 18, 2023

Comedian Drew Lynch joins to discuss the downsides of growing up in Las Vegas, the first joke he wrote about having a stutter, having a service dog that specializes in anxiety attacks, and Gianmarco shares the secondhand story of sh*tting in Steven Spielberg’s house. You can watch full video of this episode HERE! Join the Patreon for ad-free episodes, exclusive content, and MORE. Follow Drew on Instagram, YouTube, & Twitter Watch Drew's new special, Short King, on YouTube See Drew in a city near you: https://drewlynch.com/tour-dates/ Listen to Drew's podcast, Did I Stutter? Get tickets to our next live podcast recording on July 26 at JFL Montreal! Follow Gianmarco Soresi on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, & YouTube Subscribe to Gianmarco Soresi's email & texting lists Check out Gianmarco Soresi's bi-monthly show in NYC Get tickets to see Gianmarco Soresi in a city near you Watch Gianmarco Soresi's special "Shelf Life" on Amazon Follow Russell Daniels on Twitter & Instagram See Russell in Titanique in NYC! E-mail the show at [e-mail] Produced by Paige Asachika & Gianmarco Soresi Video edited by Dave Columbo Special Thanks Tovah Silbermann Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is brought to you by A Real Pain. From Searchlight Pictures comes one of the buzziest films at Sundance Film Festival, A Real Pain. Written, directed, and starring Oscar nominee Jesse Eisenberg alongside Emmy Award winner Kieran Culkin. Witness a hilarious and moving story about two mismatched cousins as they tour through Poland to honor their beloved grandmother. The adventure takes a turn when the pair's old tensions resurface against the backdrop of their family history. See A Real Pain only in theaters November 15th. Welcome to The Downside. Hi. My name is Marcus Rezzi. I'm here with my co-host, Russell Daniels. Hi. We had a guest earlier canceled today. Yes. We've been here a while. We've been here a while. Russell and I seem testy with each other. We've been here since 11 a.m.

I got you lunch. I got you a PB&J with two helpings of steak on the side. It was the weirdest meal I've ever seen in my life. But there was a weird menu. And I was like, oh, they put peanut butter and jelly on the menu. They must be confident in that peanut butter and jelly. So I was curious. And then it said, do you want to add a protein to the side?

And I said, sure. You know, like, what a weird. But they suggested it. You had to be able to... Other people clearly would have done it in the past. That's what Elon Musk's son has for breakfast. A PB&J and two helpings of the finest steak. Well, I only ordered one. I don't know why it came with

two little things. Yeah, I have a feeling you ordered two based on the price. We're here. Very happy to be joined by our guest today, stand-up comedian Drew Lynch. Welcome. Hey, guys. Sorry I canceled earlier. Yeah.

I cancel, and then I show up later. That's what I do. Yeah. We just said, well, we got to take the opportunity as it comes. Well, we'll talk about you in a second. I've been doing a lot of doctor stuff this year. Basically, I thought I was going to get SAG insurance one day.

Ten years later, not happening. And I'm like, I can't wait on my acting career to take off to get my health checked out. So I went to, I got my heart, I got a CAT scan. I got checked for nodes. No nodes.

Wait, nodes on the throat? Nodes on the throat. Yeah, yeah. I was a singer and I yell a lot on stage to make up for when there's no punchline. You're so emphatic. I know. You would hardly know that it's compensating. And no nodes. But I realized the thing.

I have this doctor, Dr. Vinny Bumatz. Reference? Medicinal? Dangerfield. That's a Rodney Dangerfield joke. Oh, Dr. Vinny Boombatz. Reference? Medicinal? Dangerfield. That's a Rodney Dangerfield joke. Oh, yeah. It sounded silly. My doctor, Dr. Vinny Boombatz.

It's a sound. Yeah. I don't like him. And I realized what it is, is that he doesn't seem to have the objective in his mind for me to stay alive. So, for example, I got this heart CAT scan. They said one of my arteries had a tiny bit of clogging, nothing unusual. But so he tells me that he says, so we did the CAT scan. So one of your arteries has a little bit of a little bit of a clog.

Yeah. And then he stopped speaking. And I have to be like, OK, so what could we do about that? He's like, doesn't want to be prescriptive. He's like my therapist in that way. Like he just wants to talk about the thing. And I'm like, no, I need you to be prescriptive. Yeah.

And then I go, oh, is there any way to fix it? He goes, oh, oh. Well, now that you ask. So you could take this. Not everyone does, but you could. And I go. Just give me a recommendation. Yeah, give me a recommendation.

Yeah. And then I say, so is it a coin flip? He goes, well, it's not a coin flip. And I go, then what is it? Yeah. So it's going to be a long haul. He says I could take Lipitor. You could do a lot of things. I don't like a doctor that gives you too many options. It should be a long haul. He says I could take Lipitor. You could do a lot of things.

I don't like a doctor that gives you too many options. It should be a very binary thing. Here's what you do, and here's what you don't do. Here's what you do if you want to die. Here's what you want to do if you want to come back. That's it. I don't need like, well, you could do this. You could go for a walk.

You could do this. I need to know what's the best. Give me the best right now. Yes, yeah. You say, this is what I a walk you could do this i need to know what's the best give me the best right now yes yeah you say this is what i'm recommending you should do some people do this but here's why i don't think you should do this yeah you know some sort of like you gotta like have an opinion i could go through all this well i could do this i could do this i could do peanut butter and jelly and steak i could do this it's sometimes i feel like the language feels like they're talking in a way where they cannot get sued.

Where I just feel like that's why they're scared to go like, do this. Because if I do it and I die, then I could sue them. But if they just go like. Post-mortem sue, that's the best kind. Post-mortem sue. You don't even have to be there. You have representatives. No one's going to sue on your behalf

there's no one that would do that I would go not on your behalf it's like one of those ones where you watch where there's a smattering, there's a guy asleep and then there's someone who came from the bus and you're like, you're studying law I would be next to those guys

I want to see what happens with just me in general? yeah I want to see what happens with you if you don't die too but I want to see what happens. Yeah. With just me in general? Yeah. If I die? No, I want to see what happens with you if you don't die too, but I want to see what happens with you if you die and how a post-mortem sue goes. Are you doing it? Did you do anything?

So he basically was like the Lipitor. I was Lipitor, yeah. He said it could cost like 400 bucks a month. And then he basically, I was like, well, how would it help? He said, basically, I'd be starting it earlier than normal if I wanted to. Start it. But he was like, you know, let's say, and these were random numbers he's just throwing around. He goes, let's say you have a 5% chance of having a heart attack.

I don't like how hypothetical this is. Now, you have a 4.97% chance. So you could take it, but maybe it's not that much. Yeah, you round up to the same result. This guy's a 4.97% chance. So you could take it, but maybe it's not that much. Yeah, you round up to the same result. Yeah, a new doctor. This guy's a nightmare. Get a new artery too.

Yeah, I think that's where this is going. That's what I'm trying to avoid. But I think part of it is that it's like talking around the fact that I'm going to, basically sometimes I want to be like, so doctor, are you telling me

that someday I will die? Yeah. Like part of it is we have to eventually, you get to an age, I imagine want to be like, so doctor, are you telling me that someday I will die? Part of it is we have to eventually, you get to an age, I imagine, where it's like, okay, so death, it's happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's the goal here? Happiness? Put this as far away as possible, which for me, I think that's what I want. It's like when you talk to your banking consultant a little bit, where they're just like, what's medium risk? What are your

priorities with this? Are you trying to ride trends? Or are you trying to take some chances on the unstable market? Am I talking too many numbers? Do you guys not have... I don't have money, but I have the consultants. We don't have banking consultants. I don't want to speak for you.

I don't. Now I do. Oh, okay. Interesting. I don't want to send out the Patreon money. I don't want to speak for you. I don't. Now I do. Oh, okay. Interesting. I don't want to send out that. I don't want to put out there that I have money. That's not it. I just meant I got the consultants just waiting. It's Wells Fargo, but it's not. It's like the standard.

When you say you have a right to an attorney, it's like that. Wells Fargo keeps getting in trouble. They all get in trouble. Yeah, but Wells Fargo's like that. Wells Fargo keeps getting in trouble. They all get in trouble. Wells Fargo feels like insanely. Give me a good bank. Tell me a good bank, John Marco. Can you cancel a bank? I don't think so. They're too big to fail.

But the smaller banks are getting eaten up by the bigger banks. I listen to these podcasts and I, if you give me a test on them, I'd fail them. But I know Silicon Valley was a bank. There was a bank rush that everyone takes out their money all at once right the bank's going to collapse and the bigger banks come in and they they swallow it yeah and they don't have it they never have it yeah but wells

fargo you hear about a lot yeah you have i i recently switched to chase what are you doing that's fancy bang america fancy chase is so my account was like bank of america's the worst we got to get you out of Bank of America. Yeah, Bank of America, that's like the Plaza Hotel of banks. Yeah. It's just the floors are dirty. They don't have the pens. None of the outlets work.

No, no, no, no. It's very weird. If there's one person in line in front of you, it's going to be an hour before you see that. Yeah, there's like a guy who's typing, but there's no monitor. And you're like, what? Bank of America just feels, maybe that's just just could just be my projection on America. It has nothing to do with the bank, I guess. That's true. That's a big branding thing.

Bank of America. That's like the Third Reich Bank. In the beginning it does really well and then they go yeah, this name's got to change. Amazing we haven't changed the name of America after all the shit that's been done. We need a rebrand. Bank of Dubai I would go to for sure. Bank of Dubai is nice. Just because they don't know about all the crimes that's been done. Yeah. We need to rebrand. Bank of Dubai I would go to for sure. Bank of Dubai is nice. Just because

I don't know about all the crimes that Dubai has. Yeah, they got misters when you walk in. But did you end up taking the Lipitor or where are you at? Where are you settled with this? No, I think I'm going to You're going to do nothing until it becomes an issue? No. I think you're giving off energy to your doctor and that's why you're wishy-washy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I do this. It's a horrible habit. It's like a childish habit where I call my dad and he had the quintuple bypass last year and he's the reason

that I am anxious about all this. Yeah. And my dad will just be like, you're fine. You're fine. And something, when I was a kid,

it resonates where I go, I'm fine. That's great. I'm fine. That's great. I'm fine. That's all I needed to hear. Who cares what the cats scan? I don't even like them.

Yeah. You should do it, though. He sent me a book. But here's the thing with cholesterol. He sent you a book? He sent me a book, How to Deal with Your Cholesterol. The doctor or your dad? I blame your dad.

My dad. My dad's way more prescriptive than the doctor. Yeah. And you know what? It's like with everything else with science. They're like, eggs? They said it was bad. But it might not be bad.

And you go, well, what the fuck am I? Because I asked my doctor. I said, I can't Google this. Yeah. Because everything comes up. Every time I tell him I Googled something, he goes, ugh. And I go, well, okay. He's very Jewish.

And I try to appeal to him on that. It says, there is a horrible part of me as a Jew where I'm like, hey, can you give me the real advice? Come on. I know I don't have a yarmulke like you, but tell me the thing. Tell me the thing. Yeah.

So. Wow. So he had quite, quite, quite. A quintuple. Quintuple. How many is that? Five. Five?

So I, I mean, I blame your dad. Yeah. Sometimes quadruple. I have never heard. Kintuple is a lot. Yeah, it's a lot. That's a lot. Yeah, my manager's father had a six tuplet.

Damn. Six tuplet, I think it's called. No, it's septuplet. That's seven. Yeah, no, I know. Septuplet is seven. Septuplet. Six tuplet. Six tuplet, I think is, I think they got lazy with it. Yeah, septuplet. That's seven. Yeah, no, I know. Septuplet is seven. Septuplet. Six tuplet.

Six tuplet, I think is, I think they got lazy with it. Yeah, six tuplet. I get so jealous of people like Joe Rogan. They get to go, what is it? And then their producer goes to a laptop and they figure it out. So six bypasses your manager and then five from your dad. Five. I don't know how high he can go. I thought quadruple was all of them.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they took a vein from his leg and put it into his heart. Wow. Leg, leg. Wow. Yeah. Leg vein, heart.

That's so, I mean, that's cool, right? Yeah, it's very scary. Science is pretty amazing, but also science sounds very like. Trial and error. Yeah, just very like. How'd they figure that out? Why from your leg? Who thought of this?

Well, they didn't think of it first. I promise they tried the elbow first and the guy exploded in the operating room. Oh, yeah. And then they got to like. I think, you know, that Steve Jobs, one of the reasons Steve Jobs died was he did not want to get opened up. Oh, really? Yeah. And so he really was like, I'm going to take care of it.

And by the time he tried eating all fruits for a year. Yeah. Because his dad sent him a book that said, eat all fruits instead of take the fucking Lipitor. Yeah. And then they realized it was too late. So you blame your dad for all of this. Oh, this and more. This is the downside.

One, two, three. Downside. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside. With Gianmarco Cerezi. Well, this is The Downside. If this is your first time listening, it might be. This is a place where we get negative.

We complain. We don't need to be thankful. We can blame everything on our father if we want to and no one can tell us it's time to grow up. If you're a fan, join the Patreon. Patreon.com slash downside. Bonus episodes, live episodes, my clean comedy special,

The Rats Are In Me. A lot of fun stuff. Drew. How was it doing clean? I really did it for Sirius XM plays So I just went through my documented jokes Took all the clean shit Slapped it together It was by track

I wasn't trying to make an hour clean It's not who I am I'm speaking I've certainly submitted for America's Got Talent A couple times And it's always like The restrictions are immense and it's always like the restrictions are immense. And it's not just they don't want, I was a theater kid,

they don't want anything involving theater, acting, brands, dirty, dark, mean. When you first did it, did you have enough ready? Were you nervous about running out? No, because I guess I just never thought about it. I never thought, like i never thought like i was already doing colleges at that time so for colleges is like 45 but when they but when you when you do clean you do have to start peeling back some layers and you have to start like edit editing down you know you're like all right i thought that was clean but i guess it's not as clean yeah and you

go all right well i thought that was clean and i guess it's not that clean. So then all of a sudden your hour or your 45 goes, and it goes down to like 20. And then you're like, oh boy, I'm getting, I'm getting kind of, you know, neck deep in what I thought was going to be. Or even if I have it, it's like the best stuff, my best stuff from my heart and my soul is not. Yeah, of course. And, and, and, and what, and all of a sudden what constitutes is not is you can't say, well, you can't say damn it there. You can't say God damn it there. And it's like, yeah, but my biggest laugh is on God damn it. What if it's a character where I'm saying God damn it for that part?

You know what I mean? And I don't mean, I'm not someone who's like, oh, thinking consciously like, oh, let me, I'm taking the Lord's name in vain. someone who's like, oh, thinking consciously like, oh, let me, I'm taking the Lord's name in vain. It's just, it's for, it's for, I think he'll, I think God will be fine with servicing the joke the best way you can. Um, but with, but when I did AGT, uh, they were like, I, yeah, I just, I, I never thought about how much time I had to submit or how much I, you know, I was always just about like, if I get to the next round, that'd be cool. And then I got to the end, like the very, very end. And then I was like, I want to win. Yeah, sure.

Yeah. There's that shift of like, I'm so glad to be here too. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You start to look at people in the competition and you're like, I could take you out. Yeah. When you, when you applied, how long, how old were you when you applied? I was 23. I just did the open casting call. I was 20, 23.

So you were only in the stand-up three years, if I got that correct? Wow. Yeah. I now realize, just in hindsight, how lucky that was. So many stand-up peers of mine, they're just like, yeah, I didn't get on TV until five or know, five or seven years or whatever. I know there were other comics on the, on the show who they'd been doing it for a long time. So, but I think like that was, um, you know, I, it wasn't like, I just like kind of lucked into it. I busted my ass as well. The year before that I did. Uh, so two years before that I did 101 different stages. I just wanted to perform different places. And then the

next year I just, I was, I was all about setting quantitative goals for myself so i ended up doing um 500 uh sets i did five i set 500 as my goal and i did like 590 so i went up like every night two or three times yeah it was like samuel bay level of like just silly yeah just getting yeah just getting comfortable in every environment and so you know i talked to tony baker and tony Baker was like, I, I, I got on stand, I got on TV after I did 500 shows. And it's not like it's, it's not like it's, it's not like it's, it's almost more of like a by-product. It's not like a logical step, like, Oh, I did 500 sets. Where's my, where's my TV appearance. It's not how that works. It's just getting so comfortable in every environment. That's how, um, that's, I think it was just a by-product of it. Were you born in Los Angeles? No, no. I was born in Indiana.

And then I lived in Vegas for about 10 years or so. How was that? I only did one week in Vegas. Almost ended my relationship. It was so brutal. Yeah, it's bad. I think it was both of us. It brought out the worst.

Were you both there or you were in different places? I was doing, she came. I was doing the Comedy Cellar Vegas room, which were good shows, but every part of Vegas felt like it was trying to scam me. There's a sadness to Vegas. There's a sadness.

Yeah, nobody's talking about it. It's kind of cooked in there. Yeah. You know? But I was in like, but it's also like, I could be saying like,

yeah, I went to New York, I was in Times Square for a week. That place sucks. So many Elmos. For sure. There's too many Elmos in New York. But you're like, but it is like, it doesn't feel like a York. I was in Times Square for a week. That place sucks. So many Elmos. There's too many Elmos

in New York. But it is like, it doesn't feel like a place where even if you spent like a week, you would naturally find yourself, I don't know, going out to the desert. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I don't know what else is really there. Like, no offense to me, but you're like, you know,

like, I don't know. I'm sure there are things to find. I went to like an NFT music artist celebration and I was like, I was like, wow, this is the last thing I want to do on every level. Yeah. I didn't, I, I don't, I see Vegas differently than every, every other comedian or every other person, you know, the allure of it is taken out of it for me, but it's also where I spent a big part of my life so i have just like a different appreciation for it were you going to casinos as a kid yeah yeah because all the like in the casinos there are all these things that are kid appropriate like they've got like bowling alleys and movies and stuff but you have to go through the casino in order to get to it so it's like you have to like dodge like oxygen tank cords like you got to do all kinds of, oh, you know, just.

That's your version of Chuck E. Cheese instead of going through a ropes course. Like here comes his motorized scooter. Yeah. It never hit. You're getting on a skateboard just going behind someone at three miles per hour. I mean, yeah. So you have to go through like if you want to meet up with your friends and you want to do bowling or you want to do, you know, the movies or you to do like i i uh nice uh roller rink whatever like they have those in the casinos so and they even have like daycares yeah yeah and they even have like i mean it's not necessarily for kids but it's just

like if you can't just like go to a bowling alley in vegas they're they're all in casinos yeah you can't and and you could go to the movies in theory but most of them are in casinos and they do that for a reason. I mean, and they have daycares that are also at these casinos as well. So like parents can just drop you off at these daycares in the casinos. That's a sad daycare. Did you see people growing up? Did you see people with the people in your life that you were like, oh, they're they they're gambling at like, is that a big thing in people there? Yeah. My parents ran a air conditioning company out there and there were employees who either wives had to come, their significant others had to come in to collect their check or they would ask for, they would ask their check to be mailed. Like they couldn't get their physical check from my parents or my parents' boss. So they had to have it mailed. Some employees, they would ask for half of their check in cash. I think there's a thing.

Yeah, I think there's a thing where that's why you can go anywhere. You can go cash your check. Too much. You can cash your check at the casinos. You can cash your check. You can take your check from FedEx and go to the thing. Go here. There you go.

They should test if you're a parent there. There's a little sting operation. At the daycare, they go, you could give us the kid for 500 bucks and chips. And then if you say yes, they take the kid away and everything works out. But is that, I mean, does that sadness permeate the air of Vegas? That there's a lot of addicts there? Yeah, it's sad. It's sad, but it's just like...

It's like growing up in a bar or something. Yeah, it's just a big bar. I mean, it is to a degree. Every casino, every kid's... Chuck E. Cheese, they're not serving alcohol, I don't think. Yeah. But a casino, they are. Well, Chuck E. Cheese, they got the knockoffs of Chuck E. Cheese out there.

It's like Peter, Pinkies or whatever. And it's like they serve alcohol for sure. Alcohol and it's all about gambling. Like so much of their thing is funded by tourism. And by tourism, that usually gets translated into like gambling. That's why the comedy shows in Vegas are only an hour long. No show is allowed to be longer than an hour and a half

I know that there's I'm fine with that rule by the way yeah me too dear god dude that rule can stay everywhere Vegas just gave us one big light god yeah I mean magic shows they're that way

they're all an hour so they're designed to get everybody back into the casinos because so much, I can't even remember the percentage, but so much of that city and where its income is coming from. But you feel it in the shows. Like, I like magic, and I was excited to see magic, and they were just some of the least inspired shows. They were so in and out. So this has to appeal

to people who can't speak English and four-year-olds and people about to die mid-show. I saw a topless review of But They Were Vampires when I was there. I think it was called Bear or something like that. But maybe not.

But They Were Vampires But They Were Toplesspless and i you know yeah it was something what did they what did they do what i was that it yeah showed their teeth and their titties and got out of there i mean there was high class a little bit you know there was not like it was not like a it was not that you know honestly i think we thought there was gonna be more but uh but you know but they had some how could there be more they took everything i don't know vampires but again it was this thing of like you're sat there being like i don't know what i thought i wanted out of this but i wanted something either like more like a strip show or higher like more like they they want to be like it's a good

production does that make sense yeah it was neither really of those things how old were you when you went for this uh i was gonna make a joke no i was uh 21 22 you know i feel in vegas just the like we're here to make money everyone we're here to make money and get out what we can and i felt it i don't know yeah and there's something about going to the starbucks and the latte was nine dollars and then the wi-fi cost money and i just said fuck you guys oh the omelet was 35 and it was the worst omelet I've ever tasted in my life. See, I feel similar. Uh, not we're here to make money, but when I, like sometimes when you go to, like when I go to LA, I have the feeling of like, we're all here trying to like,

yeah, do showbiz sometimes you're in a coffee shop and you see people and they're on their computers and you, or you're in a hotel lobby and you see business meetings happen. And what I, the only thing I'm like, that's better to me than like the Vegas feeling of the sadness and blah, blah, blah. But there was also something that makes me be like, Oh, what I like about New York is that people are doing all sorts of things that are unrelated to what I do. And that makes me feel more anonymous than feeling like you're competing or you're, I don't know how to describe it.

No, no, no. Los Angeles feels like. But I'm also going to the very like, if I'm going there, I'm staying in a hotel and blah, blah, blah. I'm not like living in a residential neighborhood in LA, you know? Yeah. Los Angeles, it feels like they're extras in their own, like they're doing background work version of, do you know what I'm saying? Like where it's loud tapping on the thing. You go to every laptop screen, it's empty. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And like the conversations that are, I mean, it's like, like they're not allowed to talk. You go closer, like watermelon, watermelon, watermelon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Like from far away,

it's like, oh, and I'm doing a pitch with MGM and you know, and then you come in closer and it's like, yeah, watermelon, watermelon, watermelon. I had a friend who moved to LA and the first thing they told me they called and they said i just took a shit in steven spielberg's house and to me that encapsulated what la was was like you were so close to this

great piece of art but all you're doing is taking a shit yeah and that's that's how i view yeah so so we've shit on both your homes basically that's fine i lived in indiana i still like la but was vegas was it like did you get any crazy adventures i mean it's it's kind of a place that a kid could wind up seeing a vampire topless at eight yeah uh i think i was pretty desensitized by the time i was like 14 or 15 by you know just by it like they got billboards with like naked ladies and just you know there's just there's things there's things that when you get there as like a nine-year-old it is it's uh like i remember when i i remember when i lost my virginity the the girl was like, like, obviously the girl got naked. And I was like, yeah, but who are you?

You know, like I've seen the billboards. I know you have to come on. Well, I was just like I was like, this is nice. But who are you? I've seen nudity. This does nothing. Yeah. Did you do comedy there at all or no?

No, no, no. I started comedy in Los Angeles. And I never wanted to do comedy. I was similar to Gianmarco. I did theater and acting. That was my whole thing. In high school, you were a theater kid? Yeah, yeah.

Middle school and high school, I went to performing arts schools. Were they good in Vegas? Yeah. Were they? Yeah, they were. Yeah, they were. What were some of your roles, big roles? I did, we did Sweeney Todd.

We did West Side. Were you in Sweeney Todd? I wasn't in Sweeney. Our school did it. Some of the roles I did, I was Riff in West Side Story. I hate West Side Story. Sorry, I know that's controversial to say.

I don't like music that goes outside the key. It's like, we pick a key for a reason. Why are you going outside of it? It's so... Traditionalist. Yeah, it's so weird. It's like old comedy where it's like, alright, yeah, but you can only do that for... Occasionally do that, but Leonard Bernstein's like, what if the whole song is that? And you're like, that's the most... Like, why

do we have the key then? Why do we have a score? What's the difference between why you wrote something and how I could? Anyway. Fuck Leonard Bernstein. Yeah, so i was bernstein that's yeah so i did well let's see i did we did riff i did miss saigon i was uh i was an i was an like an army dude yeah we did but these are all the musicals we did we did um we did like uh dearly departed we did um uh spitfire grill we did cats god i hated cats you thought you think you think i hated leonard bernstein i hate t.s elliott We did Spitfire Grill. We did Cats. God, I hated Cats. I hate Cats. You think I hated Leonard Bernstein.

I hate T.S. Eliot. You guys had some budgets for Cats and Miss Saigon. You have a helicopter coming in? Yeah, we did. Wow. Yeah, we did. They had sets from New York that they bust in to come do some of these. Jesus Christ.

Yeah, it was big. They had a PAC that was $1,300, and then a newer theater that was like, it sat $800. $1,300 for high school theater? How big was your high school? I don't remember how many kids, but it was all performing arts. Like everybody,

like people had to like audition. That's insane. Yeah, people had to like audition to get in and shit like that. And then we did some, and then obviously we did some Shakespeare stuff. It's so weird that I'm,

that like there's all these mainstream shows are the ones that are coming to mind. But we did Edward Albee plays. We did Martin McDonagh stuff. Did you do an Edward Albee play? Yeah, we did Virginia. Oh, you did? Yeah.

Were you the younger guy? I wasn't. I stage managed that one. Oh, yeah? When you're a freshman, they have you stage manage a show. You can't just get into a show. You have to stage manage and humble yourself. have you, like, stage manage a show. Like, you can't just get into a show. You have to, like, stage manage and humble yourself. Not even stage manage, but tech a show.

So, but I was, like, I mean, like, for me, I did summer school. I did P.E. So I did P.E. during the summertime so I could take additional, like, classes, like, different, like, minor and something else so I didn't have to take P.E. during the actual school year.

And when I took summer school for PE, I just read Neil Simon plays. Like I literally was just flipping through shit. Like I love plays. Like I honestly- I love reading plays. I kind of fell off it, but there was a time that I read plays.

It was kind of, it was a lot of money to pay $10. And then you read it in an hour. And then be like, you're not gonna read it again. Yeah. Yeah. But like, I love that. Like I love, like Neil love Neil LaBute. I love-

Dream play role. What's dream play role? Well, I did it. We did The Pillow Man. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I can't remember the kid's name. We did an exercise in acting class for The Pillow Man.

We recorded the lines, and then we had to act it out, lip syncing to the lines that we recorded. Oh, God. One of those exercises where it's like, hey, let's just do this. Maybe this does something to you. And I don't particularly enjoy the vanity of theater or the vanity of acting. I'm very introverted,

and I think theater kids are very, obviously they're over the top, but the writing component, the performance component, I enjoyed all of that. And so like a stand-up was always something that was like in the periphery and I enjoyed it. But it was never something that I wanted to do or wanted to pursue. When I moved out to LA, I was on a softball team and I had an injury because of that. And that fucked with my motor skills.

So when you moved to Los Angeles, you went to college? No, no. I knocked out my first year of college in high school. Uh, so I could take a year off in LA. I was like, I'll, I'll, I'll get, I'll do all these AP classes in high school. So I don't have to go to college for one year, show my parents that I'll move out when I'm 18 and I'll see what I can do in a year. I'll move out when I'm 18 and I'll see what I can do in a year. And then in the year that I was there, I had a manager. I had an agent and I was getting callbacks and booking stuff with like Disney and shit like that. Was that because of the high school, the pedigree of the high school? Or how did you get in front of all these people?

Yeah, no, that had nothing to do with it. The high school was just, I don't think that carried as far as like any merit or any credibility yeah i just think you just get your foundation through that um and so you're doing baseball as just a softball softball it was a softball league that i worked at a comedy club out there in la they had yeah they had a uh pickup softball team that they did every week i worked the door there flappers team i worked the door there and they uh yeah it was just it was just like a like it was a perfect job because it was like i have my night i have my days free to audition do gigs and then at night i just get to be around comics you know it's like i get to be around funny it's it it's in it's it's like uh it's uh it's like next to it you know what mean? Who were the older legends stopping by at that time?

Was Jay Leno still going there then? Jay Leno wasn't quite there yet, but they had like, I'm trying to think, like they had like Jimmy Dore. They had Paul Reiser stopping in quite a bit. I'm trying to think who else was in the burbank area that would kind of just drop down um uh but it was a lot of like it was just it was starting up it's not like it wasn't like super established and when i started working there it was like just a few months after it opened so it was just kind of but you were acting you're acting and you just did that because it was part of yeah

i just did i saw the night job i like, it's a perfect night job. And like, there's just, there's comics around. I did stand up two times before my injury and I was, I bombed terribly. I didn't, I didn't just, I didn't know anything about it. I didn't know like what to really do. And so I just, it just didn't, it just didn't really go well. And I think like something that stand up,

stand up is like making fun you know we make fun of ourselves or we at least find a way to like humanize ourselves and and doing it and i i just i think that that part was missing for me when i first tried it so when when you had when the injury happened you were 20 and what was your thought process? Would you mind just what happened exactly? Yeah, yeah. So I had a grounder hit me in the throat. I was playing shortstop, and it took a bad hop. And what's crazy about softball is you're set up to succeed.

When it comes to you to bat, we underhanded to each other at such a close close to, it's point blank range that we're just handing. It's like, I might as well just hand, like hold my hand and have you hit it off my hand, you know? And it's bright, it's yellow, it's bigger. You can't, you can't miss it. And, you know, I hit me, it hit me in the throat and I fell and I hit my head. I initially thought that, and sort of the doctors thought that by me having a vocal contusion, that that was something that messed with my speech. But it was actually by me hitting my head, I had a traumatic brain injury.

And I never healed it. So there's two things that happened. First, this hit. Yeah. And your vocal contusion? Vocal contusion. What does that mean? It's just bruising.

It's just bruising on your, just, I got hit here. Yeah. And then I fell and I hit my head. But I fell backwards. So my head snapped and hit the ground. Oh, and you didn't go to the hospital. No, no, no. Not that night at all. Or yeah. I mean, I was, I mean, I was, but here's the thing is like, I don't remember the rest of that day. I don't remember the injury itself. I don't remember that. I don't remember that day. I, um, I, I just remember being in the hospital at some point and i know

that you said it wasn't that day no no i went home you went home i went home did people say that you said hey i'm fine no one no people said that i was just a little bit spacey that's what they told me the next week they were just like a little you're a little out of it uh sorry i almost made a kind of kind of spacey joke so glad i didn't uh but they said i was driving down the wrong side yeah yeah it was crazy dude softball is wild uh no i did um they they said they said that i was just i wasn't quite myself but i was still like functional and so i drove myself home and i uh i went home i went to sleep that night and then i woke up the next day and everything was just uh everything was off and again this

is all accounts of what has been told to me i don't remember the next morning i don't remember uh the injury but eventually you make it your way to the hospital that day my roommate drove me to the hospital the next day fucking a yeah yeah Yeah. Yeah. He was, he was pretty shaken up about it for, as he told me. I mean, he was like, he was calling my mom and like, it was a whole thing that my mom flew out from Vegas. Were you friends with your roommate or was it like, okay. Yeah. Cause I've had a roommate situation where like.

It would not be ideal. No. Well, I told you it was i i came home one night and my roommate was like i thought he was asleep on the couch and he drank so i thought he was just sleeping but sitting and they got up he's like boom and i it's two in the morning yeah and i was like do you want help and he's like and i have no idea what it was but all of a sudden i called 911 10 police officers came i'm reenacting what he said to me for all of them and and and he they asked him a thousand times do you do any drugs i think looking back he was on shrooms or something he was on some kind of

but the next day he kept he swore to me the day he moved out that he wasn't nothing happened and that nothing had happened was it like sleep talk like sleep talking it's what i i but my girlfriend has night terrors like there was nothing he he seemed wide awake and as if like as if he had a stroke or like he had a throw up in his mouth no throw up in his mouth and he actually just won america's got talent He's an incredible stand-up comedian. But I... I had a roommate one time that, again, not friends with. So, you know. Yeah.

And they had gone to the hospital because they had the flu and it had been bad enough that they were... And they called and they were like, you haven't checked in on me at all about this. And I was like, I'm not your friend. It was one of those things where I was like, I knew that they had gone to the hospital yeah but then i was like i made sure that they could get to the hospital i was like i felt like i was done do you know what i mean but it was like it hurt their feelings that i hadn't checked in and sure and um i think they were wrong still because

we don't talk anymore do you know i mean like i was like i i made it wasn't like i was like they were like desperate for a ride and I didn't give them one. It was a weird situation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How long were your roommates? A year. Like it was in college.

It was like, you know. That's a pretty long time. But it was multiple roommates. It was a house with like a lot of roommates. Do you know what I mean? It wasn't just me and this other person.

It was multiple. There was like six or seven of us. So it was a little like, but I was the reliable kind of responsible. Roommates are a confusing thing. It's an emotionally confusing thing. I'm the responsible one, so I can't.

It's not a good thing. If you're the responsible one, you're in trouble. You're at the... Yeah, it's everything. Well, you'll deal with it. I can't handle that. It's too much responsibility. It's injustice. I can't deal with it. You'll deal with it. And it's, I can't, I can't handle that. It's too much responsibility. It's not,

it's just not, it's, it's injustice. I can't deal with that. You deal with your, like dishes. I made a thing. I'm organized enough to be like,

I'm Mondays. You're, you're Tuesdays and follow the thing. And they're like, yeah, well, so that's the problem. I,

the, my, my wife is, she's my, she's the best roommate I've ever had. And when I think, I think that's the thing is when you find someone who's able to be a, I'll marry a dude. I don't give a I think that's the thing is when you find someone who's able to be a, I'll marry a dude.

I don't give a shit. It's like, like if you're accountable, I love that. Yeah. I don't care, man. My girlfriend has made me a much better living partner,

but I'm worried that I've made her worse. Oh no. Her tolerance for messiness. There was just one of those days where I looked at her and I was like, this place is filthy. It's all of her shit now. Oh no, what did I do?

Wow. I made her comfortable with mess. Yeah. Good for you. Yeah. I mean, you just break the walls down or you don't have to

break the walls down. The trash will build up and you just climb the trash over the wall and then there's no wall. Right now, my biggest issue, we have a trash can.

It's not a good trash can. I need to buy a new one. We'll never buy a new one. Yeah. It's tough to get the bag in. And you got to kind of pinch it. You got to pinch the bag for when you put in. You know, they have the little container within the bigger container.

Yeah. You got to pinch the bag. That's the only way to keep the bag to get holding. Yeah, no, I know what you mean. And she can't do it. She can't do it. Why don't you just think that you're... Every time she wears the bag...

Why do you just think that you're thing? Because once in a while, once in a while, you got to do the other person's thing. Yeah. Once in a while, you got to do the other thing. Yeah.

And then she does... She says, I can't do it. And that's where I have... That's where I struggle. I go, yes, you can. Wait, what do you mean pinch the bag? I just want to understand.

You... So like the only way to get the bag to not just fall in to the. You have to like pinch it in that little hole. No, you got to like tuck it. You got to tuck the bag around the little container. And you got to do it fast. Because if you don't hold it to the very last second, it gets loose. I understand.

Okay, the tuck, I understand now. And then I throw away a piece of paper. It collapses inside of itself. And she goes i can't i don't know what to say about that i don't know what to say that without starting okay if it bothers you that much get a new fucking garbage can or a new girlfriend either one man yeah no which one you love more here's the thing i don't i i've my trash can is also not it's not regulation i don't know the trash bags are not uh it's not regulation i don't know how i got this trash because you know if you buy the trash bags they say this is 34 quarts or whatever i don't it's so funny that they measure it in quarts like we're pouring milk and all um so they have like it's like 34 quarts or whatever. And then the trash can, like the lips of the trash can itself, it's just, it's always,

you bring it just far enough and then it, it, it breaks that part. Like break when you want to do the tuck, you know what I mean? A little fitted sheet for your own trash can. Is there a big enough? Same with the sheets. Just make it big. Just a little bit bigger. Make them a little bit bigger.

Just a little bit. A hundred gallons them big. Just a little bit bigger. Make everything a little bit bigger. Just a little bit. 100 gallons. Yeah. Whatever that means. Yeah. What do Ontario dairy farmers bring to the table? A million little things. But most of all, the passion and care that goes into producing the local, high-quality milk we all love and enjoy every day.

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when you remember being in the hospital, was your stutter there right away? Yeah, it was. I have videos of, I think, when I was in the hospital and then shortly after, my speech. I almost can't even recreate it. It wasn't even a stutter. It was just like there was vocal staccato. I realize that sounds like stuttering.

It was like... It was so bad on my vocal it was so bad like when you talk about nodes immediately i was like oh because i've had vocal polyps um and and just just the misuse of these glottal attacks that i had on my uh on my vocal area is just constant just constant stress. Constant. When you had the stutter, in your brain, is it smooth and then you're just like, it's coming out here? Yeah. Here's the thing.

I've stuttered for so long and I think the demand of what we do all the time is to say the perfect thing with the exact right intonation and the fewest words possible. And so it's almost like when I'm having a conversation, I'm thinking of two ways to say one thing. So it's like, it's like, it's like, it's almost like trains. It's like, I'm on this

train, but at any moment that one could, that one could succeed. Like it's just, it's just, and so it may, what would I miss genuinely? What miss, is not being present in conversations. And I don't want that to sound like foo-foo-y. No, no. It's just, it's like, we already all struggle with that anyway. Like, things are so busy. You're so like, ah, I just this. But for me, I just, it's even more because it's like, it'm the i'm like the person who's in the corner watching

the scene you're performing yeah it's like i'm yeah it's not it's like it's like i'm directing more than i'm performing it's like i'm watching the scene rather than just being in the like you know what i mean if if we're talking about that as a metaphor it's like i'm watching it happen so i don't actually get to experience the fullness necessarily of what someone else is saying and i know like i give people credit by listening and paying attention to everything that they say. So I remember details, but at the same time, my brain is just going a hundred miles a minute because it's like, uh, well, what happens if you get stuck here? Then you have to be able to come up with a quick detour and another way to be

able to say that same thing. Yeah. And that's a common, that's a common tool that a lot of people who stutter use. It's just, you know, it's only been recently through so many remedial therapies, uh, that I've been able to articulate it close to the speed at which I think it. Yeah. Yeah. When it kind of set in that you had this stutter, were you did you go through the stages of grief and that you thought maybe this will go away? Yeah. Maybe this is temporary. When did it when did you go, oh, the career path that I thought I would have becoming a TV actor, movie star, whatever the dreams were. Like, was there a depression point? I mean, you seem like an ambitious person, whether it's coming in with your business. I mean, you're counting your shows. Like, you know, game recognize game.

That's all I want is Gianmarco saying game recognize game. Or just insanity recognizing insanity. It does. But like, was there a dip or were you like, okay, now I'm a stand-up comedian. What was that depression, that downtime? Yeah, I think more than anything, my superpower, if I could advocate for myself, which I rarely do, is my drive. for myself, which I rarely do, is my drive. So when I, it's the idea that you can only, you can only, I don't, I don't like the term waddle because it has just such a negative, it's not, it's not the term, it's not something

that I do for very long, but for those stages of grief after I lost, after I got dropped by my manager, dropped by my agent. Was it right away? Did you go like, say hello and they were like, is that a stutter? Bye. Yeah, no, it wasn't like that. It wasn't like that, but it was like, it was pretty shortly after, because I missed, I had appointments the next week.

I had callbacks and final callbacks and like CD meetings, workshops. I had shit like lined up. So it just, and the momentum of that year was just starting to like, I mean, I was just, I don't know. I don't know how. I mean, it was just, I was just, I was just in, I was just in it and I was so excited to get to doing more of it. And when it happened and I started to realize that things were like opportunities and all these doors were closing. I think that's why the, the, the nature is the nature of my injury goes is so counteractive or so counter, uh, counter,

counter believed, I guess is the word I would use is like, it's just like, why would someone who stutters go in front of an audience of people and, and, and, and talk, you know what I mean? You think someone who stutters it, their biggest thing is speaking in front of a group room of people, but that's been something I've been doing my whole life. And so I, I don't, I don't, that doesn't, that sometimes has an effect, but it rarely does. It's just, it has everything to do with, um, you know, uh, for me, it was just this figuring out the the the physiological component and how that and how that damaged uh um the the the brain the brain the pathways that i needed to use to try and get my like system back up and running for how i connecting my brain to my speech again

yeah you know it was just the physiological component of trying to tackle that rather than being like, oh no, I'm in a room full of people. When in actuality, that's where I feel like I'm most comfortable. I think you could probably understand that too. Sure. Yeah. But when you, how long from injury to going, was your first stand-up set?

Maybe a month later. I mean, that's really short. That's very pivoting. Yeah, it is. I mean, I'm so impatient. Like I mean, that's really short. That's very pivoting. Yeah, it is. I mean, I'm so impatient. Like I said, I'm so impatient. And it's like, I had so many,

like I worked the door there. I worked the door at Flappers. So I had so many comics who were like, dude, you got to talk about this. Like you have to talk about this. And I remember I had written some things on a napkin when I was in the hospital. That's comics. They're like, I got hit.

I'm starting now. Dude, that opener is going to be sick. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And it wasn't something that I was super – I just wasn't super familiar with it. And I remember the first set that I did, it was at an open mic. It was in front of comics. And it wasn't like a good set like it

wasn't like whoa like you know it wasn't a good set but it was impactful so it felt like it wasn't like I impacted them it was just it felt like it had meaning it felt like they it felt like they understood what was going on so many comics already heard about what had happened who went there and so they understood you know it was just, it was just like, it was just like, I, I understand the sentiment of what he's saying, even though, you know, he's just making these little, what was your first joke about it? Uh, the first joke that I had, I think was, uh, when I went to the doctor, I was, uh, when I, yeah yeah i was in the waiting room and there was a guy who said uh why are you talking that way are you retarded or something um assholes can be such doctors

sometimes that's what it was you know and so like it but these were all short jokes because word economy is like so important. And that to me is like, that to me is like, that's something I'm so thankful for about my injury is it taught me just, you have to edit it down to like the final two words, the final word, the whole, the last two words, one word can change the whole context of the sentence if you just change it. So, you know, it would be like these little short little like one liners because my speech was just so, you know. When you felt anxiety or we had someone on, Benny Feldman, who has Tourette's syndrome. And I believe he was talking about when he feels stressed, sometimes it makes his tics happen more frequently. Was there any time in the beginning, like, does anxiety make it worse?

Yeah. Were there any shows where it was like, you were so stressed that, I mean, it just feels like one of those, the more stressed, the more you stutter, the more stressed you are. And it just could like collapse into not saying anything from it. Yeah. And, and, and I've had shows where I've had bad shows. Like I've had, I've had bad shows where it where it just i i tried like i remember there was a show that i did a few years ago which this was like 2019 and um 2019 was sort of like the last year where my speech was starting to get just so much better you know the pandemic really helped because we just had so much time to just focus on ourselves and we all kind of went into our own projects or dived into ourselves and 2019 i was doing tacoma i was doing tacoma spokane or tacoma spokane i was doing spokane and we were i was just on a walk with my wife and we i just remember i don't i don't know what

happened but i just could not i couldn't i just couldn't go on. Like I, I remember looking over at her. I was just like, I just can't, I can't talk. I'm just stuttering so much. And I went on stage, both shows that night. I, it was just, it was like 2000. It was like the year was 2019, but it felt like it was like 2013, 2012, like early, early entry all over again. It was just, it was so humiliating it was just i and the audience was like understanding but i i could just feel and i don't know what it was man i have no idea what it was i i felt so and i just get so like i'm so controlling like i'm i like to have control i like to be in control so i the fact that and a stutter goes against the very nature of that

you know it's just it's something that's like, you want so badly to be able to control something. And then by doing that, just like we were talking about, it exacerbates the issue. It makes it more inflammatory. And so that's been the lesson that I've had to learn is it sounds cheesy again to say like in letting go, but it's like the less you almost think about it, the better it is. So it's like with the less you almost think about it the

better it is so it's just this weird sort of um it's like this extra dimension to to that you have to almost operate in where it's like you can't think about it too much but you have to be aware that it's a part of your past yeah and i imagine it's a unique experience too because i have a friend who developed setter like later on in life yeah it's so rare and it's so rare and and also to be like this wasn't something i had to deal with for so long like you're like so to have to like reorient like and you know and now it's like similar to you a lot of therapy a lot of things to to it's like similar to you, a lot of things to it's barely a thing now. But sometimes with anxiety or if you are a little drunk, like it comes out. And so it's just such a unique experience to not have it be a thing and then be like, wait, this wasn't a thing.

Why is this a thing now? When was the Today Junior? What was that from? That I think was. Yeah, yeah i think it's did he have a stutter was he just nervous in it no i think some kid in the odd in the audience in the in the classroom yeah i just remember a certain age range where like that was a thing people said yeah i feel like there's been a i've always thought it was probably an interesting challenge for Saturday Night Live when they show Joe Biden and they're trying to comedically make fun of someone. And I feel like they don't touch

the stutter at all. I felt like there just came some point where people making fun of stuttering or making any jokes about it became totally taboo. It feels very 90s making fun of a stutter or something like that where you're like really you did it last year shut the fuck up when but it is

shocking when you watch some of the content from i was watching step by step recently uh-huh and shocking things that in the 90s we all were like yeah yeah we like that and you're like it's so and it wasn't it was like it was in that same area of like it's a it's a man you know what i mean like it was whoa there's a documentary about uh trans people in show business and they show that scene from ace ventura yeah oh yeah and it's like where he kisses uh a trans woman and then it has a three minute scene of vomiting and brushing teeth and it's just like wow and that itself is terrible but it's almost

family guy-esque where it goes on for so long we were like okay the thing itself is not funny but the fact that they committed to that is what's so silly about that. What's so funny too is like in the 90s you're like it's like asking the audience to identify with like the person that's being mean and a you're like it's like asking the audience to identify with like the person that's

being mean and a lot of times it's like it's like again step by step it's like suzanne summers this beautiful woman you know you're like that's not any of us no it's like it's like the in the 90s people who are making that tv you're like this is us and you're like it's not us yeah who the fuck do you think you are that it's us? That's what makes Friends more painful because they make so many fat jokes and they're all hot. They're all like thin and hot people. Why are you so mean? The thing I was referencing in the step-by-step, it's literally Suzanne Somers, who's beautiful. She's on a double date with her and her husband.

They're both beautiful. And her fat, homely sister, whose only thing is that she's horny and lonely all the time. That's her only thing on the show. They wrote her after the first season. So she's in the show. She never gets a date. And she's finally gotten a date. And he loves her.

He's a nerd. He loves her. And they're just into each other. And they just have questions. And they're talking. And they're like, oh, these two hot people can't stand to be on this double date for 10 minutes. And we're being asked to laugh at all the things. And you're like, what about this is so rude.

Yeah. They came over to your house for a dinner. Just be fucking polite for 10 minutes. And they're trying to make excuses how to get out of it. And like your sister never has a date. It's just so mean. This is real terrible. But just like the unusual people

are bad where that's like the whole narrative where it's normally the other way around yeah it's terrible and going back to like the Joe Biden thing like when I hear a Joe Biden because there's so many Joe Biden jokes right now I mean and I get it I don't like there's it's rare that someone will say a joke

about a stutter or someone that they experience who had a stutter like I've heard comics tell jokes about a time that they met someone who had a stutter or someone that they experienced who had a stutter. Like I've heard comics tell jokes about a time that they met someone who had a stutter or whatever. To me, if it's funny, it's funny. I don't get upset by it or offended by it. But there is a part of me that almost like regardless of however you feel about politics or politically, like Joe Biden's had a stutter for years. Yeah. And so there's people who don't know that. And there, and there's people who don't, there's people who don't know a lot of

people who did. And I do because I, I, I just, I pay attention to that thing. And then, and people might not be aware of where people came from, you know, like, you know, Paul Rudd, Ed Sheeran, like these are all people who stuttered and you would have, you would have no idea. And it's like, it's, it makes you more sensitive to – I'm not sensitive in the way of like whatever. Even if a joke is bad, it's not going to – whatever. It's not going to upset me or offend me, but it is just such a thing that's like I'm just hyper – I'm hyper aware of stuff like that, especially regardless of how you feel about him politically or how you feel about him cognitively. That's something he battled with for a long time. Did you have a service dog for a period of your life?

Her name was Stella. She passed away last year. No, that's all right. She was a big part of my life. I had a dog in 2000. I got her in 2012. And we did a show for a really long time. I did weekly vlogs with her and I would just kind of vlog

and then she would sit next to me in the chair like perfectly still and she had like captions over her head. And we actually built a lot of our online presence because of her. You know, it was like after america's got talent like you're just done like you know you know they don't they don't they teach they might teach you how to introduce you to a career but it's up to you to like sustain it afterwards you know yeah and so i was trying to find a way to like do a thing that i that i loved or around something that i loved while also trying to generate content so what was was a big part of my life. What was the service dog for?

What did you need a service dog for? So she was trained in respiratory and onset breathing. And I would have a lot of panic attacks, basically. After this thing? Yeah, yeah. Interesting. I mean, I didn't go to therapy. I didn't go to any neurolog to therapy i didn't go to like i i didn't go to like any neurologists i i didn't i didn't see anybody who really tried to like uh well i didn't like it was my fault i didn't actively try and

um rehabilitate or deal with any of those feelings and through those stages of grief that I had. Yeah. And I felt, when I got Stella, you know, there would be moments where I was in like a, I was in like a, I was in like a crowded place or I was in an area where I just didn't feel

welcome or I didn't feel like I belonged. You know, it wasn't, it wasn't, it wasn't, there's just still feelings that I had. There was still, there's just feelings that I had that I just weren't addressed. And I would let she, I would lay down on the ground

and then she would just lay on top of me until I felt better. And it was either that or I had to be near a bath. and then she would just lay on top of me until I felt better. Yeah. And it was either that or I had to be near a bath. Near a bath? Near a bath in order to calm down. And if you're not near a bath. What do you mean near a bath?

Why a bath? That was the only thing that I had to call me. To take a bath? Yeah, to take one. As opposed to what? a bath yeah no no I didn't I just did it like but it takes a long time to fill a bath I mean are you waiting you're like come on let's go with the water no right away right away when you get one right away yeah you fill it all the way up and then get in you're saying you sit down you let it you let it right yeah I let the water right underneath me dude and also I identify with the calming thing because when I was panicking,

before the vaccine, I got COVID in November 2020. And, you know, we were freaked out. You're like, oh, like, you know. And the thing that I did every day, like for the two-week period, was I took like five or six baths a day. Because I was like, it was something about it that was like calming and like, I don't know. As opposed to your regular four.

I take a bath a day, usually. Got a great bathtub. That's why. There's a lot of bathtubs I wouldn't take a bath in. I have a really good tub. If I'm having a panic attack, I don't care about the tub. I mean, it's just, if the sink's big enough, let me get in there, dude. It's something about just warm water being, it's just about the heaviness of the warmth.

Just feeling like I have, I don't know what that is. I don't know if it's just, it's just putting me in a place of where I can't, in a mobilized state. I have no idea, but those are the only two things. And I got to a place where with my panic, with my anxiety, where I was always driving in the right lane on the freeway. I don't know about that. I always knew about hospitals on my phone, like whichever ones were nearby. And I always drove in the right lane so I could, so I could exit anytime to get to the nearest.

And if you went to a hospital and you go and you go, I'm having a panic attack. Give me a bath. What do you do? I never, I know. Well, I bet I did go, I did go to, and during, uh, during the pandemic, I went to the hospital my wife took me to the hospital for something that I thought was for sure a heart attack but it was just panic attack I think we've all probably had some version

of that if you've never had them thankfully something's going on in 2015 but I had two that year and it was terrifying your It's terrifying. It's just your body is reacting and you don't know

what's happening. But yeah. Nothing you can do. I got to a place where I could feel them coming on. And I knew what it was. And then luckily, I haven't had one in years. Yeah, I don't know how. I don't know how mine's gotten a little bit, mine's subsided

quite a bit as well. It was helpful when I knew what it was to be like oh you can feel your body going into that thing and be like you don't need to go into that thing like it's okay you know so yeah were there any challenges with bringing a service dog around all this touring and traveling um yeah it's a lot. It was a lot. But she had been on over 600 flights, something silly. Like, she's done, like, she had been everywhere.

And she'd been to London. She had been to Canada. She had been to France. Do you think she could tell, like, I'm in the sky? Like, I've broken the laws of nature? I don't know. Or she's just in a different room? She was just in a different place.

She was just the most, she was like, you'd be surprised at things that she could room. She was just in a different place. She was just the most, she was like, you'd be surprised the things that she could do. She was just, yeah, she was just a special dog. Was there any feeling after she passed, like, do you get another service dog? Or that was kind of like, you had run its... I think that was, I think that was kind of the end of that. Yeah. Yeah. Chapter. Yeah. And I think she had a place and she had a role that she served. And my wife is someone who she travels with me all the time.

So if something happens, you know, or whatever, or I have, if she's not with me, I have someone else who travels with me. But I think she was there to try and mitigate or maybe have me transition to a place of feeling like I could do this on my own. And still navigating that. But, uh, what she did was just, uh, I don't know. It's crazy, man. When you talk about animals, you talk about dogs, their ability to, to, to, to know you and to service. It's just, it's crazy. It's, uh, it's, uh, it's, it's, it's unlike anything. And I think came, she came to me at such a time where it was so like it was just us you know it was just the two of us so you know and when i there was a time where i don't stutter when i talk to myself and you don't stutter when you talk to animals you talk to animals it's easy really yeah don't know what's the thinking no idea i don't know if

it's a comfortability i don't know if it's just the absence of judgment yeah there's just it's just there's something about there's something so like it is unencumbered unconditional acceptance no matter what and that is such a sacred space that and it's the opposite of what we get as as comics or performers or even as human beings yeah so you know in another way she helped she helped with that like i would just i would talk out loud to her and it would just be so it's just the idea that you don't you can just go through all this and you got no no just no judgment no matter what it is that you're saying any person any person you ever met who stutters, you can ask them. If they have a dog, when they talk to themselves, when they talk to their pets, they don't.

You know how they say it when you're on stage, pretend the whole audience is in their underwear to make your nerves go away? Yeah. You could pretend the whole audience is dogs. Is dogs in underwear? Just imagine those dogs. Now I want a dog to Run some material by my dog. Yeah, I mean, it wasn't even just

necessarily material. It was just, you know, sometimes it was that. I mean, sometimes it's standing in front of the mirror and trying a thing. But, you know, a lot of times it was just yeah, it's just that silent understanding. And I've told people this who I work with.

I told this to my wife. Like, my love language, and you guys might agree as it ends, but they talk about like the five love languages or whatever, gifts, acts of service, physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation, right? Some version of ours is probably words of affirmation. We enjoy feeling like, you know, validated by whatever it is that we say or do however i think there's a sixth one and i think it's mine and it's i think it's i think it's uh i think it's communication

that's what i think it is my if i can communicate with someone and they and and they understand they like they understand me and vice versa that is the ultimate for and that's you don't even have to tell me it doesn't have to be in the form of praise it's literally just I'm communicating an idea to me I'm communicating an idea to you and you understand it or you're contributing to it you listen to it that fills my love cup

and so when we're on stage and we convey an idea or we wrote a thing and then we edited and we fucking performed it and we, we wrote it and rewrote it and fucking re and tried it. And then we execute it and it's, and then it's completely understood or you get the sense that they understand you better because of that thing you just said.

It's, it's the best. Yeah. And it's not, and it's not, and it's not praise. It's just, you know,

and I, and like even something that I'm doing right now, like I, I'm explaining more about me in a vulnerable way to you guys. And I get the sense that you're both listening to me and that makes me have a deeper appreciation for you guys. So it's just,

it's not even such a selfish way of feeling a love language. There's a relationship to it. There's a contribution on two parties. And that's what I think I was missing for so many years with stuttering is like, I couldn't even make eye contact with people because I would stutter for so long and then they get uncomfortable. Like they get,

you know what I mean? You stutter for so long. It's like, I have two reactions now. Like I had to, one, one reaction was I would stutter for so long that people, they do busy work.

Like they, they get, you know, they start Twitch, they get, they look through mail, they check their watch, they get,

they get like, they turn into, yeah, they do just, they just do stuff. Like they turn they get, you know, they start Twitter, they get, they look through mail, they check their watch, they get, they get like, they turn into, yeah, they do just, they just do stuff. Like they turn into like little, these little meth, like, ah, that's, yeah, that's crazy. You know, they start looking around for people. And now, because I don't stutter and for so long, that was such a big part of my identity, even though that was not something I was like, I'm, I'm the stuttering community. It was just something I talked about because that was my frustration. was like, I'm the stuttering comedian. It was just something I talked about because that was

my frustration. Now it's like, now when I don't stutter, all I get is eye contact. People look at me like, they're not even sure if it's me. They're like, they're looking at me from different angles, you know what I mean? They're like, is that you? What? You know? So it's so,

you know, it's just, it's weird. And my relationship to it, I get it that this podcast has been spent on such a large part of it has been spent talking about it because for so long, it was such a big part of my life, but I had almost a resentment filled or tumultuous relationship with it because like I would, you know, I would talk about, I would talk about it on stage because that was my only thing. And that was the only thing because that was my only thing of course and that was the only thing that was my only thing that i wanted to complain about that's all that we're

supposed to be doing is talking about our our frustrations and then um and then later when i got better people were like well what the fuck did you just use that to and it's like no you don't you have no idea how long i've been at this fucking thing you know what i mean yeah and you have no idea how long i like how much i don't want to talk about it i wanted i want to address it so you feel better and then i want to talk about other shit like a human being yeah you know yeah yeah anyone go because uh benny feldman with with tretsy some people accuse him of faking it yeah and it's a wild all the time but these are these are the dumbest people in the world who say that. Yeah.

I mean, it's all the time. And it's just, like I said, I did a TED talk last year. And I talked about how I was initially mocked for stuttering and then later called a liar because I succeeded despite having it. You know? It's just crazy. It further proves the point and puts a punctuation on the idea that people are never happy or they're never going to be happy with something that has to do with you. And they want to put you into a box and then when you break out of it, then they want to put you in a different one. It's like they want you to succeed but only if it's on their terms.

Let's go on to our next segment. This has got to stop. This has got to to our next segment. This has got to stop. This has got to stop. Duva, this has got to stop. Yeah. Yeah, I think we got to figure out when someone's waiting in line and they're waiting for people

and they're like, oh, you can go ahead of me. And then their person still doesn't show up. And so then they're just, they're like letting people go at like, they now work there. They're like, Oh, you go ahead. They're almost like new gatekeepers. Yeah. You're the new. Yeah. Yeah. And also sometimes they are, they're waiting, but they don't tell you for too long. So you're kind of standing there and you're giving them eyes.

You're giving them the eyes. Like I'm looking for permission to go past you. Cause there's some space and they're not, they're not, they're kind of giving them the eyes like, I'm looking for permission to go past you because there's some space. And they're not, they're kind of talking to the other person they're with. They're not paying attention. They're not doing a good job of being like, go around me sometimes.

And then you're like, then if you, sometimes you just go and they're like, oh, like, but you were, you gave such a big space that we all thought that, you know, so you have to be,

if you're doing that, you have to be better at communicating. And what a power role. Your friend's late, so you're put into this position of power to be like, you know, you get to decide who goes ahead now. Wait outside the restaurant or wherever you are.

I've done it before. I have been that person and you feel guilt, but also this weird sense of like, I get to, you guys can go ahead. Am I supposed to say thank you? Oh, thank you so much. You have, you can't go. You've granted this for me.

Thank you so much. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. I like that. This has got to stop. You got one? Okay.

So this is very specific. This has got to stop. There's two people on my street and they both talk to my dog who doesn't like being talked to. And it's clear. It's clear. He doesn't like it. dog who doesn't like being talked to. And it's clear. It's clear he doesn't like it. But he doesn't like it. And they do it almost every day. And he starts barking, and I have to be like,

and pull him across the street. And it's gotten to a point where I'm not interacting with him either. And they're just like, oh, there you are. You don't like it when I talk to you. And he starts barking. And I'm like, stop fucking getting this dog riled, them either and they're just like oh there you are you don't like it when i talk to you and he starts barking and i'm like stop fucking getting this dog riled because then other dogs start barking in the neighborhood i'm like and it's the people it's the people because you're like he wouldn't bark at you if you weren't yelling at him but it's like and i know that it's his issue

but it would be the same thing as you've gone up to a crazy person on the street and you were like hi why don't you smile for me and then then they started yelling like oh you don't like it when like they're you need to like like with the leash like whoa it's slipping no you got to make them understand there's a thing where you're like shut the fuck up like i don't know what to do other than you think shut the fuck across they're doing it passively aggressively to be like you need to get your dog to stop barking they're going to be like still like do you think they think they're, cause clearly they're aware. They're loud, too loud people.

They're louder than my dog. They're too loud people. One of them works for the parks department and is always cleaning like by the park there. And, uh, they're both loud. They're both loud people that you could hear.

So I avoid them in general. If I see that they're out there, I go the other direction. But sometimes you can't, you, you happen upon them and i'm like just shut the fuck stop talking to my dog like it doesn't like it and like you could and also i've said to them we've said you can talk to the other one the other one likes it he's fine

with it he won't bark he blah blah but this one doesn't like it don't talk to him you know it's i i don't even i've even met these people and i know them yeah they they i don't know that it's passive-aggressive intentionally i but i think that subconsciously people think they give me I haven't even met these people and I know them I don't know that it's passive aggressive intentionally but I think that subconsciously people think they give me dog whispers it drives me nuts too people think you'll be like

oh he doesn't blah blah blah and they'll be like I'm great with dogs and you're like sure but also who cares I don't want to have to do this for you this isn't about you it's always about them. That's the thing. That's the thing.

Dogs, people like it to be about them, and dogs validate that through anyway. Period. For sure. So anyways, I just got to stop talking to my dog. My this got to stop. Enough with this not weed, but it is weed. Or they say it's weed. I was at an event, a comedy event, Moon Tower.

And there was a company and they said, we're going to send you a whole box of edibles for free. Just put in your address. And I was like, amazing. Great. Finally. And then you get a box and it's like, this is Delta 9. It's like, instead of THC, it's THN. It makes you feel blah, blah, blah.

It's not. Enough of this. And I go to these states. I'm like, is weed? They have a weed store there. Like a great weed store. And it's all Delta 8 or Delta 9, which is just not weed. Yeah.

If you have to break down all the ways this will make you high, I don't need to know if it's weed. So they've been doing this in New York before it was legalized. They would have the trucks and it sold you weed lollipops. But it was this shit. It's not weed trucks and it sold you weed lollipops. But it was this shit. It's not weed. Stop pretending it's weed. You're lying. You're building a whole store. Speaking of, they were selling CBD for dogs. It's out of control.

I just want weed. We don't need to modify. It's a proven model. Weed's undefeated. It's been doing a great job for years. And we have two boxes and I brought it here for no one to eat it's a bunch of th9 th delta 9 what the it's nothing it's nothing yeah did you try it though uh we did and i felt i felt absolutely nothing okay i know what being high

is you can't you can't trick me with marketing into that i'm high yeah yeah it's just you gave me gummy bears you a box of fucking shitty gummy bears. Yeah, yeah. Thanks a lot, Moontower. Let's go on to the next one. You better count your blessing. You better count

your blessing. Real quick, I meant to say, send us your This Has Gotta Stops. The email is oh my god the downside WGS with your Marcus Raisi

the downside WGS at gmail.com send us your this has got to stops we'll say them on the show and you'll get even bonus if you're a Patreon member

we'll say yours first patreon.com slash downside Russell do you have a blessing yeah dog centric today recently well not recently but in the last few months got a second dog patreon.com slash downside. Russell, do you have a blessing? Yeah, I'm dog-centric today. Recently, well, not recently,

but in the last few months, got a second dog, and we did a long process of putting the dogs like where they're both comfortable. They're both pit bulls, so, you know, things go wrong. Things could go real wrong. So it took a long time, you know. Aren't you not supposed to say that as a pit bull owner?

I think that's the whole thing is breaking down the myth. Oh, pit bulls are very – You weren't here when Kyle Kinane was here. He called them baby eaters. Okay, shut up. Things go really wrong. No, listen.

Listen, they're a beautiful – they're the sweetest. I love pit bulls. It's all I'll ever have now going forward. They're so sweet. They love you. They sit on you. They just want to be held. They're like these babies, but they're strong.

There's no getting around that. They're strong.. They just want to be held. They're like these babies, but they're strong. There's no getting around that. They're strong. Just like you, Russ. Yeah. And so one of them, the one that barks, is the older one. So we've had him a long time. The new one doesn't bark at people, but we're putting them together, and you don't know, and you want to feel comfortable.

So we do all the steps to make sure it's okay. One's tethered for a while, blah, blah, blah. They're on leashes, blah, blah. So anyways, we ripped off the Band-Aid this last week. And they're out. They're together. They are so happy. They're playing all the time.

And it's rough. It's a rough playing. A lot of dog owners, I'd see, they'd be like, we can't let our dogs play with that dog. But they play at the same level, which is exciting. And it's very clearly play. They're doing it. They're resting. They're doing it they're resting they're doing it they're having fun their tails are wagging they're they're knocking shit over

in the house no no no but like they're you know they're they're wrestling around and like they're like oh you know their their mouths are open and around each other's faces and but it's all like no one's clamping down no one and it's like i feel totally great about it like i i was nervous when it first happened, I was terrified. I was like, we're ripping off this band, maybe one of them's going to get real hurt. You don't know. You just don't know.

Yeah. But they're loving it, and I'm so thankful for it. They're sleeping on each other. They're cuddling. If they turned on you and it was you versus them, battle to the end, who's going to win? They would never turn on me. I know that they wouldn't.

But just if they did, like, you know, like side effects. I think they would win. I mean, truly, they're both 60-pound pit bulls, and especially if they double teamed me, you know, there'd be no way out. I mean, I can pull them both around, you know. I've taken them both on walks together now by myself. Not long ones, but like short ones.

What if one ran this way, one ran that way? You split in half. Yeah. So stretchy. I told Nicole, Nicole can't do it. She tried to do it the other day and it was like, it was too hard for her. But like, I was like, I can do it. I'm strong enough to do it.

Do you think you have like really strong like arms from it? No. Because they're pulling. They are pulling, but you know, you have the right leash and harness and thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But so I'm thankful that they're they love each other they're they're they're cuddling so they're sweet that's great i'm excited that that's oh it was so much uh work to keep them separate and blah blah so now it's a huge yeah

yeah weight off the shoulders uh my blessing so my sister she she's been she does fashion stuff but she's been helping me i've been really i told you getting into like uh getting like old theater shirts yeah i'm like really into this concept of getting like high school theater production she's been going on etsy and the problem with vintage is you know it always costs so much money and you're like really this cost five dollars when the school sold it but she got me one of my favorite shows a Little Shop of Horrors. She got me this vintage with the green, a nice green Little Shop of Horrors. From where? From, let's see. It's fun to see.

By the way, if you ever come to my shows, wear your fucking old high school theater shirts. 1990. 1990, Little Shop of Horrors. It's in good condition. Yeah, it's in really good condition, and it cost it. And it doesn't say where. No, it doesn't. This one, I have a Guys and Dolls one that she got me. But I really just like it. I don't know why. Something cost it. And it doesn't say where. No, it doesn't. This one, I have a Guys and Dolls one

that she got me. But I really just like it. I don't know why. Something about it, it fills some nostalgia hole in me. This is St. John's College drama production of Guys and Dolls. So if you have theater shirts,

you don't want them and they're large, fucking give them to me or wear them to a show. I think that would be fun. Drew, what's your blessing? Man, those are both such good blessings, you guys. Dogs in theater. You know, this is my blessing.

I have a floor rug at home, and I stretch on it. I'm in the top. Like, this is a great floor rug. This is a great stretching rug right here. I'm big into stretching right now. I think it's so good for you. So at night after shows, I'll grab, like, I'll get some tea. I'll try to get into as much of the splits as I can.

I'll get my laptop, and I'll just write. I've got my tea. Floor rugs. You're writing in splits? Yeah. Yeah, it's silly. It's very theater kid of me, actually. I used to do that back then. I would watch

a whole TV show. Yeah. Never got the split. Nah, it's hard. I mean, it's hard. It's a hard thing. You're going to get there? I'm pretty close. I mean, if you give me like 15, 10, 15 minutes, I can pretty much get there. If you can like dead drop in it into the middle of the show,

I mean, it'd be amazing. Just for no reason at all you just do it something doesn't work split what that's it's always so cool when you can just go like when you see people go it's the i don't know what kind of you know what kind of what are these quadrants like what are these adductors that you have yeah to the strength to be able to pop back up oh that's a that's a great goal though goal, though. I should try to aim for that. You know? I just don't know how your balls don't get just crushed.

Yeah, but that's the payoff, though. That's the payoff, though, for the, you know. Like, you know, it's the bird trick. You know, the bird dies, but, like, there's not a bird in the cage anymore. For our patrons, I like to do, we like to flash their names up on the screen right now

do you know a street joke any street jokes you like you know what I would say I don't know any good street jokes all I know are just jokes I'm going to say one out of this book we don't know if it's good sometimes they're horribly offensive

but let's see here let me read one oh yeah okay let me just make sure I didn't do it this one these are offensive they're intentionally offensive no no they're just like street jokes. Some of them are old.

Have you ever heard of this guy? His name is Jackie Martling. He does stand-up comedy, but it's just he goes on stage and he does street jokes for like an hour. And I kind of like it. I like street jokes. Yeah, street jokes can be a lot of fun. Jake Johansson has great street jokes.

He's got just great jokes, but you can tell him. All right, tell this one. Act it out, that one. I'm not sure what it is, but I highlighted it a long time ago. A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street together, and they both want a drink, but they have no money on them. The priest says, I've got an idea how to get us some free drinks. He walks into a crowded bar

alone and the rabbi stands at the door and watches. The priest orders a drink, downs it, and then the bartender gives him his tab. The priest says, but my son, I've already paid for the drink. The bartender says, I'm terribly sorry, father, but it's really busy in here and I must have forgotten. The rabbi walks in and orders a drink. After he downs it, the bartender gives him the tab and the rabbi says, son, I paid you when I ordered the drink. The bartender says, I'm terribly sorry, sir. I don't know what's wrong with me. The second time that's happened to me tonight.

The rabbi says, that's okay, son. No offense taken. Now just give me the change for the 50 I gave. Russell, Daniels. Oh, it doesn't even say that. You just added that on your own. You gave it an anti-Semitic twist. I like, you know what?

I think that's the way the segment should go. I give you a joke. Now I know what you'll do every time. No, it won't always be anti-Semitic. Sometimes it'll be racist. Sometimes it'll be sexist. Where can people find you, Drew? Sure.

It's at thedrewlynch on all social media. And then I have my own podcast that I would love to have you guys on sometime. I'd love that. It's called Did I Stutter? And we do that every Tuesday. Russell, where can people find you? At Russell J. Daniels on Instagram. Or come and come see Titanic the Musical at the Daryl Roth

Theater. You're in Titanic the Musical? I'm sorry. I did not mean to interrupt your plug. That's so cool though. Yeah. I'm sorry. Doing eight shows a week right now, baby. You've heard of Titanic? The ship? Yeah. It's not

Titanic the Musical. Oh. It's Titanic. No. I knew. I knew i that's why i said like i had a feeling because titanic the musical is a very uh respected show boring boring closed but not even in a year our show's been running for a year off broadway it's a fun parody uh and it's all celine dion music oh that's awesome titanic celine dion's the narrator oh that's awesome. Titanic. Celine Dion's the narrator. Oh, that's so cool. Not the real Celine Dion. And for me, find me everywhere at Jomarcus Surreys.

And again, join that Patreon, patreon.com slash downside. Whether it's Titanic or Titanic, all shows will close, as will our lives. This is The Downside. One, two, three. Downside. Down is The Downside. One, two, three. Downside. Downside. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside.

With Gianmarco Ceresi.