The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #166 Cruising in Central Park with Kevin Allison (Patreon Exclusive)

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Starting point is 00:00:23 Shop at Sephora today. Limitations apply. Must be a beauty insider. See terms at sephora.com for complete details. I'm in the middle of Greenwich Village at the Tisch School of the Arts, and I'm like, where do gay people get together? So I went to the musical theater floor.

Starting point is 00:00:38 I was like, let me go to the seventh floor. It seems like upstairs. That's so, that's like, where do I start? I know, the singing. Is that Cinderella I hear? Yeah, and I was just once again eavesdropping and heard these guys talking about this bar called The Works up by Columbia.

Starting point is 00:00:57 So they were talking about like where all the Columbia University guys got together. And I went to The Works and it was so like disorienting to me because I grew up terrified of male competition I just associated the competition of sports and everything like that it just gave me anxiety so my first time walking into this gay bar with all these gorgeous Columbia gay gay guys and whatnot I was like oh shit now i'm in a realm where it's men competing with men for each other no i was terrified i was like i just didn't have any experience with like i was just used to having crushes on guys and thinking oh he'll think he's beauty i'm the beast he'll

Starting point is 00:01:43 think i'm a monster if i let him know my feelings you know and that was just so hardwired in me so i got super duper drunk that night at the works and then at about three o'clock in the morning i was like yeah i was trying to sober up walking out of the bar and i was like there's a big void across the street like i'm so used to looking around new york after this week here of skyscrapers. And I was like, oh, that's not a void. There's trees. This must be this thing they call the Central Park. And haven't I heard rumors that gay men congregate inside that park and have sex together?

Starting point is 00:02:20 Now, I did not know where in the park that happened. It's a big park. It's a very big park. That void goes on for a while. So I just started walking into the park, and you know, it's kind of dangerous to walk there. I was going to say, did you feel scared at all? I mean, it was the Central Park jogger case

Starting point is 00:02:41 that recently happened, too. No, I was like dead set. I'm like, I'm going to have my first. I'm going to get fucked tonight. No matter what happens, no matter what happens, you're going to get penetrated one way or another. It was the beginning.

Starting point is 00:02:57 My God, I'm walking into this void. Totally. It was the very beginning. It kind of lasted throughout most of my 20s and 30s, the feeling of, oh gosh, gay bars, give me anxiety because it feels like you're auditioning. But going into purely anonymous sexual experiences was a total turn-on for me because no one's talking.

Starting point is 00:03:18 You don't have to be charming at all. Was it literally like... You just have to be naked in Doc Martens. at all. Was it literally like... You just have to be naked in Doc Martens. And, you know, you have ways... When you get in a situation like that, you're a

Starting point is 00:03:32 shower, you know? At that point, everybody's coming. It's dark. You can just sort of feel around. Is that a little person? Was it so anonymous like you didn't even have a full visual? You're just, like, walking the bush.

Starting point is 00:03:50 You feel. It can be. It can be. But that night was ludicrous because that part of the park is called the Ramble, and I was nowhere near there, right? You mean the part for cruising. Yeah. It's the Ramble. Yes.

Starting point is 00:04:02 And it's still. It's still happening. Still? Yeah. It's the rainbow. Yes. And it's still, it's still happening. Still? Yeah. But like, I heard that like maybe last summer, someone had set up a DJ out. Wow. Gay rights has gone too far. The gay agenda.

Starting point is 00:04:17 They set up a DJ, a little like mimosa stand. Wow. So no, no, no. I was like, okay, no, no. I was like, okay, listen. I'm already lost in this park. I forgot to put down any breadcrumbs. And I'm figuring, look, if I see any male walking through the park,

Starting point is 00:04:42 he's probably either coming to or fro the For a Sex Party. So I'll just get together with him. And so I just kind of parked myself in some bushes and waited for someone. And I was like, I'll just shake my branches to alert someone if he passes. And sure enough, like 10 minutes later,

Starting point is 00:04:57 this guy, and he's like wearing Brooks Brothers and has a briefcase. Also, are you 18 at this point? Yes, I'm 18 from Ohio, a week in New Yorkcase. Also, are you 18 at this point? Yes, I'm 18 from Ohio, a week in New York. And how's your gaydar at this point? I'm not very good. I'm just making these assumptions about people walking through the park. You're the poor straight guy walking through Central Park at 2 in the morning.

Starting point is 00:05:19 Like, oh, that bush is waving to me. Oh, my God. Oh, no. So that's the... No, please don't put your mouth on my dick no please don't make me a shower no no this this was like the second story that i ever told on risk right like it was like at first we thought we could do risk as a weekly show and i was like jesus christ i'm not going to be able to come up with a weekly story for 14 years. But anyway, so it was the second story I ever told

Starting point is 00:05:49 and I was like, I still don't, even though the whole idea of this podcast is that you can talk about anything, I still don't know what the audience can really take. So in the story I have it. Seven inches, eight inches. Exactly. In the story I have it that I shake my branches

Starting point is 00:06:05 when this guy who is clearly a businessman, who is late from doing his law job or whatever, is walking past, and he looks at me, and he's like, what the fuck is the person in the bushes doing? And he hightails it out of there, and then I collapse and drunken stupor and end up getting on the train later, you know, waking up like a couple hours later being, oh my God, I fell asleep in Central Park and someone

Starting point is 00:06:30 stole in my shoes. And the train finally comes. It's like five in the morning. I'm so terrified of catching or of not catching it that when the doors open, that's when all the nausea from all the drinking finally catches up with me. I throw up into the train. There's like six or so people on the train. And they've like gone to the other end.

Starting point is 00:06:55 They're like, who waits for the train to stop and vomits into it? But I didn't have time. I was like, I got to catch this. So I jump in in my socks and slip on my own vomit. Oh, my God. And then I just waved to everyone like, hello and good night. But then, so that's how the story used to end. And then a couple years ago, I was like, I might as,

Starting point is 00:07:19 the risk audience is so used to so much worse than this story now that I might as well admit, I suck that motherfucker's cock. Oh, my God. Downside. Downside. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside.

Starting point is 00:07:43 With Gianmarco Ceresi.

The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #166 Cruising in Central Park with Kevin Allison (Patreon Exclusive)

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