The Downside with Gianmarco Soresi - #17 Shrooms on an Empty Stomach with Myq Kaplan

Episode Date: June 1, 2021

Myq Kaplan (The Tonight Show, America's Got Talent, Comedy Central) might be too positive for this podcast but we kinda got him to talk about the downside of doing shrooms on an empty stomach, summer camp infidelity, and people who say they really want to go vegan but it's just too hard!!! Listen to MYQ KAPLAN's new album A.K.A. Check out one of MYQ KAPLAN's Just For Laughs sets Listen to MYQ KAPLAN's podcasts Broccoli and Ice Cream & The Faucet Specifically here's THE EPISODE GIANMARCO WAS ON Join MYQ KAPLAN's Patreon Why was the last episode #15 and this is #17? Because there are two Patreon-exclusive episodes released every month! Check out The Downside Patreon and for just $5/month you'll get ad-free, day-early regular episodes + two bonus episodes/month. We'll also be adding videos of the full episodes there as soon as I can figure out why my GoPro's keep overheating! See GIANMARCO SORESI headline The Tiny Cupboard (1717 Broadway, Brooklyn) TONIGHT at 9PM Follow GIANMARCO SORESI on twitter, instagram, tiktok, & youtube Check out GIANMARCO SORESI's special 'Shelf Life' on amazon & spotify Subscribe to GIANMARCO SORESI's monthly-ish mailchimp Follow RUSSELL DANIELS on twitter & instagram E-mail the show at [e-mail] Original music by Douglas Goodhart Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

okay are recording here we are recording here gotta turn this up i'm getting so you're getting really good at this john marco thank you know how to hit all the buttons yeah like in the beginning am i getting better or is that no you really are good thank god i'm getting better at something i opened my can look at this um all right so we're going to talk for five minutes in the beginning and you can feel free to throw things in feel free to laugh or sneeze cough whatever thank you and then we'll we'll bring you on and mike caplan i have it oh yeah that's definitely fantastic i nailed it um all right uh uh welcome welcome to the downside russell how are you doing

i'm doing really well john marco how are you doing i'm i'm feeling more anxious than normal uh so let's hit it. One, two, three. Downside. You're listening to The Downside. The Downside. With Gianmarco Ceresi. I got to tell you, I'm nervous about this opening. I keep going like, well, I have nothing really to say other than bad, anxious, hot, nervous.

Do you like the opening still? I do, yeah. You do yeah you do yeah okay then we'll keep it for you mean oh you mean like like us talking for and and then well it's just like it's the same thing every time how are you you're good well it is interesting we don't haven't done it a lot where we do two in a row so so sometimes it feels so this is interesting right now because we are recording this we're already recording a second episode in the same day with guests the first time we've ever done this we're still very new yeah podcast i uh i'm your first second yes yes wow um so i am anxious and i i didn't talk so here's why i'm anxious so i i got an ultrasound on my balls. Oh, my God.

And I wanted to share it because I just want to share everything. Wait. Okay. So I just had like an ache, just an ache, like a hollow ache in the right ball. And I do workout stuff. And I thought, you know, I read and they said it could be anything from a tight hamstring to call your parents and say goodbye. And I postponed it for a while because it would go away and then it would come it would go away completely and then it would

come back yeah so i finally i got this ultrasound and uh i had an ultrasound once before when i got that hernia from crossfit and so you you go there and uh the the woman was very talkative who did it we were like chatting it up and she she i mean took for she really covered everything she was on those balls for like six seven minutes what happens so they it's it's like you do with a baby uh but they they put like like all that like sticky stuff yeah yeah yeah on your balls and i'm wearing the gown and it's like at some point she was like hold hold your penis and there's always that thing where like i understand it shouldn't be embarrassed but we rarely hear an adult that i'm not close to say penis that i'm like you just start getting a little giggly and we're telling to hold it yeah yeah yeah and so i

i grabbed the whole package and you know lifted it up and she's like no just your penis that's not the that's not and i'm like right right penis is just the the the not ball part so i holding the penis and uh uh she's just going around and you can hear it like with a baby you can hear like the heart you know like that's its heartbeat i'm so stressed you're hearing and it's like that's your artery pumping blood into your balls. Into your balls. And at one point she even said, she turned it up like loud,

because I made a comment about it. And then she turned up the noise loud, and she was like, I'm just joking. I was turning it up loud. And then immediately she was like, don't tell anyone. You don't have to tell anyone. Don't tell anyone I told you I turned up your ball music. And it was just like, you know, because I don't know if they're allowed to joke around at all, but it was, it was just, don't tell me when I told you I turned up your ball. And it was just like,

you know, cause I don't know if they're allowed to joke around at all, but it was very funny. Immediately. She was like, Oh, just, you're not gonna,

does she know that you're a comedian? Well, she does. So she, so she, that seems like I, you didn't listen to her at all. You're telling everyone right now.

I'm telling everyone right now. Well, you know, it would take a lot for someone to track this down all the way. I figured I'll, I'll bleep out what I was getting checked out i don't know but she we talked about uh comedy she was like i want to see a show as people do and the thing is she can't she wasn't allowed to tell me anything in the room about you know does everything look fine any weird things

going on yeah uh and like brutal like will not share and so i'm looking for cues yeah and she's like i can't tell anything but i'd love to see a comedy show and i was like well do you think you'll be seeing a show in a couple months from now or do you think like you'll have to see a show in a week like i'm like give me something here i've got a a great magnum opus planned for the year 2072. Would you like to buy it? I'll give you a free copy right now. So they came back. The doctor said everything looks fine. Oh, great.

But then said, like, you had some kind of vein thing, but it's fine. But check it out. And I was like, what the fuck? Check it out. Like, you have to get, like, a, what do you like you have to get like a like a what do you call a doctor uh a urologist yeah urologist a cock right cock doc urologist cock doc yeah i was listening to your an album of yours recently and you instead of urologist you said a penis doctor or a cock doc like you use that as a shorthand i wonder if that's true it doesn't

sound familiar to me but i believe oh i'm 100 sure fair enough uh well uh well with that let's bring on our guest i'm very happy to have you uh mr mike caplan hold your penis everyone hold your penis oh god uh well thank you thank you for joining the downside you said you took your first subway here since COVID. Yes, that's correct. Good experience? Very reasonable. So, like, noteworthily valuable in how regular it felt, again, even though everyone's wearing a mask, and all of the advertisements are for masks.

That's new to me. Just, like, every, the whole car is just, like, wear a mask, wear a mask, wear a mask. Everybody's wearing a mask, except for the guy right across from me. And so I lapse into my normal, like, can you believe? Like, there's my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Golan. I don't know that I've ever said her name before publicly. But I remember this memory. We went to like, our class took a trip to like the opera or some kind of theatrical production like outside of school.

And I remember the next day in class, she said to the class, she's like, we went to the opera. And I noticed that some students were not clapping. And that just stuck with me so much. I was like, wow, she was like angry. I guess on behalf of the performers like like you're supposed to clap and and so i'm on the train now i'm like there were some people not masking there was just one guy and i'm like i mean you know who knows what he has going on in his life those school field trips are my i missed it my high school like sophomore year they all went to see romeo

and juliet at the shakespeare theater beautiful theater.C. I missed it for some reason. Funeral or something. And apparently we were so bad, the school was banned from the theater. And for weeks after, they were giving our class lectures about our shitty behavior. And I would always be like, I was not there.

A funeral. Those class field trips are... One time we went to Howe Caverns. It was one of those things where it's a cavern. So you're in there and you're going through and there's maybe an underground lake or

river that you... They had a gondola on this underground river. Great field trip. I remember a friend of mine and I thought it would be funny to rock the gondola. and the guy like the tour guide who was like pushing it politely said like like no rockin you know that kind of thing and then this gondola is a rockin stop it and then like my friend and I I guess did it one more time

and all I have a memory of is that man hit me with an oar. Like he pulled it out and he goes, I said, stop. And he hit me on the back. And I think now, and I remember being like, oh my God. And I did stop. But I remember thinking like now, like as an adult being like, I can't imagine hitting a kid, especially if they're not my kid. And I'm at work like this guy. Oh, yes. You're not my kid, and I'm at work. Like, this guy... Oh, yes, you're not allowed to do that.

I was just like... That's the guy who should have been saying, don't tell anyone about this. Where was a teacher being like, you know what I mean? It just was like, I was hit by an oar from, like, a thing. I mean, I must... That was annoying, what I was doing, for sure. Looking back, are you like, well, that should be allowed. You were both

wrong. i wasn't hurt i remember being like i'm not i was more shocking because like i wasn't hit by my parents so it was like more like a an adult that i don't know hit me with an oar did you tell your parents no i think there's an alternate universe where he didn't and you became like you'd be in jail right now like he set your life and you realize the first time in your life oh you can't fuck around always yeah there are consequences it must have been a tap but it still is it was jarring to be hit or touched with an oar also it's possible that if he hadn't done that you might have capsized the boat and died yes yeah i mean that's what they're worried about

oh yeah that it's he wasn't just like rules are rules it's what they're worried about. Oh, yeah. He wasn't just like, rules are rules. It's like, we're underground. This boat. Dangerous. Yeah. Drowning is an option in water. Yeah. So, Mike.

So, my subway ride here was good. Is what I'm saying. Now, you've grown your hair out. You Groucho Marx, Marc Maron. I think both of the two of them. Ooh. hair out you you groucho mark marks mark maron i think both of the two of them oh you know i people have said each of those things separately but no one ever said marks maron marks maron maron i think if they do a stick or treat that's what you gotta do i did maron one year and i didn't grow the hair all the way out but i did get i did have the mustache and uh it was it was fun to live in

that guy's head briefly on purpose for a moment and then stop, you know? Could you write it? Well, you're very different comedians. I mean, I listened to him so much, like, when his podcast first came out. I mean, I can do a brief—do you want a brief rendition? I would love. And so I think it's more the content than—I'm not going to get his voice, but he's like, you know. I mean, because we're also both—you know, we are different people, but we different, but we're, we're different Jews, which to most other people be like,

yeah, same, but don't have to listen to, you know, but I, okay, let me try to remember one of the bits was something like, I was like, oh yeah, you know how, how that people think that most suicides happen after, like around the holidays, the holiday, like Christmas time, Hanukkah, people don't talk about Hanukkah. But they say around Christmas time. But it's actually, I learned, it's the spring. Spring is when more suicides happen because during the winter, it makes sense that you're miserable.

But then when it starts to get beautiful out, people are like, oh, it's me. And that's the way that I feel about my career. That's perfect. That's very good. When you said it i was like is that a maron bit i don't uh i think i wrote it sure you should that that's that's very good i um so i we we did a podcast over over the coronavirus we did it on oh yeah you did my podcast broccoli and ice broccoli and ice cream and that was a lot of fun oh yeah that was like the first time we really it on... Oh, yeah. You did my podcast. Broccoli and Ice Cream. Broccoli and Ice Cream. And that was a lot of fun. Oh, yeah. That was like the first time we really interacted.

We've seen each other. Because you do a lot of shows. I remember seeing you at like Jekyll and Hyde. There's a restaurant in town. Oh, I remember Jekyll and Hyde. Yeah, yeah. In 14th Street. Where like the mic still has to be like...

So you go up there and you're like, so I went to college for musical theater. It's spooky. And I remember you being there, and it was like, Mike Hathaway? I saw him on Comedy Central. And it was very exciting. It's funny, because now I had the same experience that you had

with Christian Finnegan when I first moved to New York. Yes. You know, like 2008, I'm doing a show in a room at Broadway Comedy Club, and I'm like, Christian Finnegan from me listening to him outside of, you know, like I know him and he doesn't know me, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, you know, over the course of time, you know, you do comedy long enough, you end up potentially, you know, seeing in comedy clubs and doing shows with like Gaffigan shows up everywhere. Todd Barry shows up everywhere. You're like, oh, wow.

Like, it's really, it's exciting. Is there anyone left for you that you haven't up everywhere. You're like, oh, wow. Like it's really, it's exciting. Is there anyone left for you that you haven't met that you'd be like, oh, whoa. That's a wonderful question. I've been very fortunate to meet so many of the people that I love so much. Yeah. It goes away fast. Like I said, like when I saw, I was going to Gotham and, you know, Seinfeld was on stage. And I was like, that's when I knew saw i was going to gotham and you know seinfeld was on stage and i was like that's when i knew this show's gonna run long like i just all i knew all i i

knew immediately all this means is that i'm not getting home till fucking 12 tonight and uh it disappears fast but i still have like mulaney jeselnik chapelle i i met i met chapelle in uh uh san francisco one time i was performing at the at sketch fest and so like he here's my my experience with chapelle is i was i was on stage uh he my my assume he must have come into the room heard one joke of mine and then after the show in the green room was like that was a like just named one joke not my funniest joke just like a joke he's like that's funny and then like the next day i was walking i think with josh gondelman uh the delightful uh hilarious wonderful friend uh and comedian i'll send this when i ask him to come on the pod oh yeah i mean i'll recommend it uh josh is wonderful

and so josh and i I were walking as friends do. And we saw Chappelle, a wild Chappelle sighting. And I was like, it was such a beautiful moment that I was like, literally the night before, he was the only ever day that he knew I was a comedian. So we were in that moment, not just people being like, excuse me, you're famous, but be like, we are same. Me and you from yesterday, remember? And then I think he talked to us for like a half hour.

And it was, yeah, that was a real honor and a pleasure. It's very, I mean, that's one of the cool things about comedy, I think. Also, because like you and Chappelle are very different comedians too, but any comedian like- Disagree, but go on. Do you think you're the same comedian? I'm making a joke, please go on. No, I think I'm here.

I'm here to tell everyone that I am the same comedian as Chappelle. I am very the same. That's why you agreed to come on here. Two comedians can have different kinds of audiences, but as comedians, you know the other comic is amazing or structurally, or you admire their joke, even if it's one you wouldn't tell. You can just have a real admiration for each other's craft. Well, that's the thing.

I mean, I remember when i used to open for a lot of like the big big name guys at uh at carolines like i was in at carolines for like you know when i moved a couple maybe a year after i moved to new york i just did a bunch of you know i'd open for like patten oswalt when he was there and i've opened from other places because we have we have this i think i'm like i think i know we have the same manager, so that has happened. But I remember I opened for Jim Norton there once, and I was like. Hilarious. I mean, it's funny because, like, Jim Norton's crowd, normally, I wouldn't book me to open for Jim Norton, necessarily.

But I feel like Caroline's, like, the elegant, you know, nightclub environment that is is it which is not necessarily like Jim Norton's like he probably does that's not like the first place that he flocks you know his audience flocking he's at the stand now for sure uh but at the because of that I feel like you know because of the ticket price because of like the the atmosphere of the venue and the show and also I feel like that helps it so that I like, I just had Doug Stanhope on my podcast, and he is a longtime favorite. Amazing. Have you ever heard Doug Stanhope? Yeah.

Like, I met him years and years ago. We were on a show together. We, like, he was the first, one of the, a person who makes it, like, not the, the thing that we're talking about, not surprising. That as a comedian, like, he's like, we, we like, we like each other as humans. We like each other as comed comedian like he's like we we like we like each other as humans we like each other as comedians we don't want each other to be each other like

you be you I'll be me you know and I remember like when I first you know I sent out like a holiday like you know time email to like everyone who I who I knew years ago and I was like you know just grateful that you exist and you're a person I know. And like he wrote back, you know, I love you. You know, like I said, I love you first. But like, I was like, wow, like that's not necessarily a thing. And so I had him on the podcast and he I was I was telling the first time I saw him, he came out. It was on like the Unbookables tour that he started. And it was in Boston at this just like a rock club. And he came out at the beginning of the show. And he came out at the beginning of

the show and he's like, there's going to be like four or five comedians on the show before me. And he's like, I just have to tell you my audience, uh, treat them like I want them to be here. So don't be an asshole. Like you might be, if I didn't tell you to do this. And so like such a genuine, as I was like, I, I told Stan, I'll be like, I always remember that you did that, you know? And he's like, Oh yeah, that was like necessary at the time. Uh, but he's like, I told Stan, I'll be like, I always remember that you did that, you know? And he's like, oh yeah, that was like necessary at the time. But he's like, but you jack the ticket price up to $50 and it helps, you know? Sure. And so now that he does that and that's what like Caroline's and their pricing did for

Jim Norton to the point that I'm like, that was, it was a wonderful audience. Like the audience, they don't want to ruin their night for like just because they're like i think that at a jim norton show i'm supposed to ruin it yeah yeah yeah um well let me just because i think this is what i feared would happen we're getting too positive and we had emailed about this we had emailed about this earlier that you said you you made it seem like you can't even experience things negatively oh no i i certainly can but it is not my choice and i would say uh like i dated this uh i did i've gone on dates with and dated a few comedians and one of the comedians that i dated for a little while uh told me uh like we were getting to know each other and

i was like telling her all about the comedians that i loved you know i just like started naming my favorites and my friends and i mean there's so many like once you get into comedy like you there's so many that even other comedians like haven't necessarily like engaged with like have you guys listened to nick vaterat's album like It's beautiful. It's a masterpiece. He's so wonderful. Like Rami Nazer. Like, you know, of course you got your Aparna's and your Tiggs and your Maria Bamford's and like people that if you're in comedy, you're like, of course I know those. But like my mom doesn't know all of those.

There's like layers of it. And so I'm like, there's so many comedians that I love that I'm like, who do you love? And I share these. And so this woman that I was dating and this this is, I apologize that this is also kind of quote unquote a bit, but it's a bit that doesn't always work in comedy, but I feel like is appropriate here because this is almost sincerely what happened. I don't remember the exact wording of it because I only remember how I keep retelling it. Yeah.

But she was like, okay, so yeah, you like a lot of people like, but who don't you like? And I'm like, I'd rather list, keep listing all the ones that I, I'd rather get to the end, exhaust the ones that I do love before I start engaging with those that I don't, because I'd rather live in,

if I have a choice, I'd rather live in the world where I'm thinking about the people and things and ideas that I love. And she's like, come on, just tell me one situation that you're unhappy with where I'm thinking about the people and things and ideas that I love and she's like come on Just tell me one situation that you're unhappy with I'm like well right now, you know, this is sure Yeah, can I ask do you have her number still? Yeah, I think we're still friends you are but have you always been this way a great question I think that When I so I I started life in.

Because you're Jewish too. I'm sorry to interrupt. But we're both, you know, originally this podcast, I've said this many times, it's going to be called Kvetch. But it seemed like I was like branding it super chewy right out the gate. So, so it just, it's very interesting that you have this perspective. I also, just real quick, I'm pulling out my digital recorder to record this as a joke, as well as I also know it's weird that we are recording the podcast, but my new hip-hop name I've just decided is Kvetch Love.

Oh, you're a recorder guy. You're a recorder bit guy. I'm a recorder bit guy, yeah. Wow. I mean, I record all my sets. I write down everything, but you're a recorder bit guy yeah wow i mean i record all my sets i write down everything but you're recorder bit guy yeah now do you do you ever like i know you're dating someone now but on first dates did you make a rule like to not take out the recorder and say what did you just say your rap name was uh

kvetch love kvetch love yeah did you are on first dates were you, this is who I am, baby? You know, I believe that I never made a rule for myself as such. I do think that in an environment amongst comedians, I might be more likely to, you know, I think we understand the tropes of being a comedian. Like, you know, if anyone ever in conversation with me is a comedian and they say something, I'm like, you should write that down. You should say that you should record that, you know, like I want all of the ideas to go uncaptured. In fact, I'll tell you that here's something that I didn't say earlier. I'm like, I think this could be a bit, if I remember it, if it's fine. But, uh, I really wanted to, when you were talking about the caverns earlier, I was, I wanted to say like, were they cavernous? Because I, sometimes when I imagine actual caverns earlier yeah i was i wanted to say like were they cavernous because i sometimes when i imagine actual caverns like caves i feel like they could be cramped yes but then when we talk about like wow this place is cavernous it's actually very uncavern like yes so yeah where there's

adjectives like is this hospital hospitable i was thinking if there's other ones i bet you could come with 10 of those yeah i feel like that's what your brain on your desk by tomorrow yeah yeah yeah. Absolutely. I'm also thinking of opening my own new comedy club in New York City. I don't think there's anything like it called The Creek and the Cavern. There you go. Or The Creek and the Cavern.

We're just going to release this as an album, I think, instead of a podcast. Okay, so I am Jewish. The answer is yes. Yes. And you grew up in New Jersey. That's right. And so how did you become positive? I honestly think, yeah, great question.

So my family, well, here's the, there's a thing from the Talmud that perhaps you're familiar with. It's one of our things. Briefly, yes, yes, yes. The Talmud. Are you Jewish, my friend? No. Okay, so are you familiar with-

You knew the answer to that, Mike. I mean, I just want to ask. Why? Because of my shirt? Because of my face? Because of what? so are you familiar with- You knew the answer to that, Mike. I mean, I just want to ask. Why? Because of my shirt, because of my face. Because what? Look, you're as funny as a Jewish, yeah? Oh, no. My shirt, my face, my neck, my back.

Okay. That wasn't the right way to do that one. Okay. But my- So in the Talmud, there is a rabbi talks about having one piece of paper in one pocket, one piece of paper in another pocket. Are you familiar with this? One of them says, this world was created for you. The other one says, you are nothing but ash and dust.

So like right in there, both of them, true things, like depending on where you are in your life, in your experience. If you think too much of one, like, you know, load up on the other one. Like if you're like, I'm everything, maybe you need a little of you're nothing. You know, if you're like, I'm nothing like, come on, you're everything. You know, your conscious experience is the center of your, this incarnation, you know, this time of your life. Literally, you can't experience anything as anyone other than yourself. Like you are everything that you know, your consciousness.

And also you can know that you are in the grandest scheme of the universe and all of space and time, the smallest spec possible, hardly, you know, a blip anywhere making no ripples in most of the universe. And so both of those things I think are what's present in Judaism, which makes sense for when you ask me,

you're like, you're Jewish. How are you only talking about like, why is the focus here you ask me, you're like, you're Jewish. How are you only talking about like, why is the focus here? Why isn't it also like, what about this part of it? And so I think that growing up, I was, I think my family, I was an only child, my family, my parents, my grandparents, like put very, you know, how like Jewish children are sometimes treated like Messiah, like, you know, they're like, he was, he was one and you could be one. Like you could be the Jewish first Jewish president, every child who never has been thus

far. Sure. Sure. Lots of belief, you know, like believe in the second coming, believe in that, or believe of the first coming for us, believe the Messiah is on the way, the first Jewish president's on the way, maybe never. I love that you keep doing Nazi salutes with every example you make right now. Oh yeah. I'm trying to point. Yeah, absolutely. yeah absolutely that uh oh guys this is just an audio podcast right i searched by the uh it's such a yeah uh uh is it possible to edit out my hand gestures like just make it look all vague but um great point um i'm gonna make sure i'm gonna hold my hand you can do it no no you're absolutely right i'm uh i'm uncomfortable so uh But saying that I'm uncomfortable makes me feel more comfortable. Thank you. So very, very great point.

I'm not a guy who thinks about the physics. I'm like an audio guy. Sure. More than a visual tactile. So I'm like, whatever my body's doing, I'm like, I'm making the sounds that I want to, you know? Exactly. Exactly. Exactly.

So I feel like growing up, my family had their thumb down on the side of the scale that was like, this world was created for you. You could do anything. You could be anything. Which helped contribute to the delusional self-confidence necessary, in part, to get into comedy, to believe that I had something to say at age 24 as a straight white man in America. I was like, ah, yes, my voice is what's missing. My voice, what am I saying? Doesn't matter what I'm saying. I am saying it because my grandmother loves me. Audiences are like, are you sure you should be saying anything? I'm like, I, who am I going to listen to? Everyone or just a few people, you know? And so I think that that was one element. Then in eighth grade through high school, my family had moved.

And so I started my life. Where did they move to? Elsewhere in New Jersey. My mom now lives in Bergen County, New Jersey. So and I remember like not knowing how to make friends, not knowing like I was introverted at the time. Like I just grown up with the same kids, you know, through seventh grade. Then we moved, had to start over, starting puberty, like was, you know, had these giant glasses and braces and didn't know how to like, you know, had just recently started combing my hair. Like wasn't great at presenting myself.

And so I didn't have like high self-confidence at the time. And so I didn't have, like, high self-confidence at the time. And so I just sort of, like, kept to myself. And I feel like, you know, I'm sure a lot of people have, like, horrendous high school experiences, horrendous teenage experiences. And, you know, it doesn't mean that mine didn't feel, like, you know, sad and lonely. But that was a time when I only, like, my only real escape was, like, I was good in school, but that didn't help, you know, me feel better. Yeah. But my summer camp.

Summer camp was a place that I, like, sort of met other. Was it a Jewish summer camp? All of them are. I mean, except for, like, sports. Essentially, like, sending your child away for the summer is a very Jewish thing. Yes, yes, yes. And so it wasn't explicitly Jewish, but there was a higher ratio. Like, I mean, Brandeis isn't explicitly

a Jewish college either. I see. And I went there. So I, I went to this. Like this isn't a Jewish podcast, but 90% of our guests have been Jewish so far. And that's, and at the camp, that's where you found positivity and belonging and. Well, essentially, yeah. I think that outside of my family, it felt like, I mean, I know that everybody doesn't have this in their family, but it felt like my family, the only family that I knew, was like on my side, but they had to be, you know? That it wasn't like big deal, like going out into the world, like my mom, my grandmother loved me, even despite what I just said earlier. Like that wasn't as explicitly stated to audiences. I'm like, I had love at home. as explicitly stated to audiences, I'm like,

I had love at home. And so I now share that with, I share what I want to with you and audiences full of people that are like, that's not how anything works. But, uh, but yeah, at the summer camp was the,

there were tons of other kids who had like experiences at least similar to mine in that, you know, artsy weirdo misfit outcast, you know, like in there. It's a good, that's a summer camp was where i made out

with someone for the first time same yeah that's where like i became goth because all the all the all the women who made out with guys were goth how goth did you get well i was like the goth like i did uh i mean hot topic big jeans with chains i did black nail polish you think it's just that they they want a a guy who like knows about nail polish? Did you have any of the culture of like, did you get in the cure? Well, that was the thing is that like I was cheerier than a goth person would be. I liked the clothing, but like at the camp I went to, all the goth kids were really into ice and salt. Do you know what I'm talking about?

If you put ice and then salt and ice and then salt, you get like a burn mark. And so they were making like self tattoos. And that's where I was like, no. Did it hurt? Do you know what I'm talking about? If you put ice and then salt and ice and then salt, you get like a burn mark. Oh, my God. And so they were making like self tattoos. And that's where I was like, no. Did it hurt? No. Oh, yeah. You're mutilating yourself.

But all the goth women at the camp girls, they were gross. They were making out. And I just remember like someone introduced me to this woman named Mallory. And I was in eighth grade. And someone was like, this is Mallory. You two should make out. And I was like, I'm in. I'm goth.

And I went back to, I started high school, new high school, fully goth. I went by G. My first day, I had orange tips. I wanted them to be red, but it came out orange. I had a goatee. I had a big, I had orange tips. I wanted them to be red, but it came out orange. I had a goatee. I had a big, big bag of jeans. And my poor parents must have been like, he has to learn. This is wild.

And I think that you should do an album or a one-man show called Cheery Goth. Cheery Goth. I like that. The cheeriest goth in the world. Yeah, so my summer camp, similar. Didn't become goth. Everyone was just like uh encouraged me to come out of my shell socially blossom mixed metaphors you know and sincerely like kids were

like like childhood where it's sometimes just like oh you're in the same place so you become friends by geography yeah but like here it was like there were there's these kids that i thought were cool and they were like and we thought you were cool like we were just these kids that I thought were cool, and they were like, and we thought you were cool. Like, we were just like, you're just nice kids. Nice kids in the same place without the, you know, whatever is going on in high school. And you go to the same camp every time. From age 11 into my 20s, I became a counselor. Wow. I'm jealous of that.

I did different camps each time. And so I had the heartbreaking experience of I did find that community. And then you always at the end would say, we're going to stay in touch. And like, I had a couple like, so this is so I, I once,

it was this group, this was the same camp where I made out with someone for the first time, you know, sexual awakening. It's all very intense. And, uh, afterwards it was like a friend group.

They either iced me out or it all fell apart. I'm not sure. Still salt and I said, do you have, and I wrote them. And again, fell apart. I'm not sure still. Salt and Iced a Dio? Yeah. And I wrote them. And again, this is, I'm in like, I think it was summer after seventh grade. Oh, God.

I wrote them and I said, because they stopped getting back to my messages. They ghosted me. You don't like that. I know anything about you. Yeah, I don't like that. You do not like that. This is on AIM. And I said, hey, guys, this is Jamarco's mother.

You know where this is going. I'm sorry to write you like this but jamarco took his own life he was he was so he was so kind of just bummed that this home fell apart and he took his own life and they did not write back to that. They think you're dead. But they should at least say to my mom, we're sorry for causing this. I was very young. I was very young. John Marco, wait. I didn't know what to do with my feelings. But I'm saying there's human beings walking in the world right now thinking that they caused someone to kill himself. Don't ghost on people.

I got to tell you, I think that's the shittiest thing a person can do is a full-on ghost with no real cause. You think that full-on ghosting is worse than letting them think that you are? Yeah, that's fine. Imagine one day someone sees you in the street. DeMarco. DeMarco. DeMarco. Oh, man.

If I may offer a potentially positive spin on it, perhaps one of them noted, positive spin on it perhaps fuck you uh perhaps one of them like noted i don't know like how like meticulous you are with spelling and like word choice but it seems to me that it like there could have been like a savvy one in the bunch that was like john marco this is like john marco yeah this is i think this is or like the next day you're back on instant messenger i go all over it like leaving an away message do you know what i mean i'm sure i said i'm sure i had my mom say something weird like you know lingoey yeah marco killed himself lol raffle i i hope i hope these people find out because that you're alive i'm concerned about them they still be listening you're concerned but they broke my heart i know that they did but i'm just saying

like my heart the fact that they didn't respond makes me nervous that they've dealt with years of trauma. What if they wrote back and they're like, hey, this is Jessie's mom. Oh, yeah. When she found out Jamarco took her life, she took her life, and we're all thinking that we killed her. That's Romeo and Juliet live at the Shakespeare Theater. Okay. We're going to get negatives out of you, Sue. Let's take a commercial break before we tackle that.

This is a commercial break. This episode is brought to you by Dyson OnTrack. Dyson OnTrack headphones offer best-in-class noise cancellation and an enhanced sound range, making them perfect for enjoying music and podcasts. Get up to 55 hours of listening with active noise cancelling enabled, soft microfiber cushions engineered for comfort

and a range of colours and finishes. Dyson OnTrack. Headphones remastered. Buy from DysonCanada.ca. With ANC on, performance may vary based on environmental conditions and usage. Accessories sold separately. And we're back.

I forget, I always, this is the first time doing two episodes this is the downside podcast yeah you forgot we talked to people about negative things check out the patreon early episodes ad free episodes bonus episodes patreon.com slash downside you don't have to hear whatever that shitty commercial you just heard was i have no control over it please join the patreon i'm i'm here with mike avlin uh uh well let me one of the things i so i i so I've always listened to you. I listened to you before, but I listened to your new album that came out last year, right?

AKA? Yes. And you were talking about taking ayahuasca, and I had a revelation of why I haven't taken, I mean, I'm very scared of drugs in general. I smoke pot occasionally, but I can get depressed existential these things but i realized one of the reasons i have this big fear of doing ayahuasca or shrooms or lsd is i i so deeply want to have a religious experience or something to convince me of something uh a little bit spiritual or whatnot and i'm like if I do this thing and I don't have it, I've, I've now, uh, eliminated the thing that could reveal to me the thing that I want. Like, uh, uh, JJ Abrams did

some Ted talk back in the day about like, he has this box that his grandma gave him. That's like a magic box and you don't know what's in it. And he's like, I never look into it because it's like something that's something special resides in the hope that like there could be something magic there. So I realized listening to your album and talking about it because it seemed like you talk about, I don't know how you want to,

I hate the word religious, I hate the word spiritual even more, but you talk about- Meaningful things. Meaningful things coming from this experience. And I just realized listening to it that's why i have a fear i have a fear of not getting experiencing the thing and thus losing the hope that it would let me experience the thing well man i think that makes sense you should live

in that fear for the rest of your life you here's here's sincerely like i i can't guarantee anyone anything about you know like i don't know anything about your own experience your life i if i if i know anything i only know my own experience yeah uh and uh and so with all of that disclaimed let me say that i was exactly like you and a fool and i'm not saying that you're a fool I'm just saying that when I was exactly like you, I was a fool. And how long, is this, how recently was this that you were such a fucking fool?

2014. 2014, okay. I mean, honest, sincerely, that is a joke. You are not a fool.

I was. Don't worry. There's a spectrum of foolery that we're all on. There's, I've been learning about Buddhism recently. And my friend Gus, who is a Buddhist, who I'm learning from and with, he says there's a thing in Buddhism that they say, like, what one fool can do, any fool can do. And so the point is that if somebody has achieved something, if somebody has attained something, then it is possible for anyone also to make progress towards. Like, it doesn't mean that, you know,

if somebody can dunk a basketball, anyone can dunk a basketball. But when we're talking about, like, life lessons and, you know, spiritual growth or, like, happiness, like decreasing of suffering, increasing of happiness, as is, like, the goal of Buddhists in general for all sentient beings, including you. That's my goal as well. Sure, sure.

But anyone can take steps to move forward on that path. So I'm not saying that you must do psychedelics or that any outcome is guaranteed. But the kind of fear that you're expressing right now is the exact kind of fear that can be dissipated by an experience like this. That's why – and I'm much more settled now. But in college, I went through a very classic existential crisis mixed with childhood things, OCD, obsessive, getting caught on the thought. And I – sometimes I'm like, you know, someone should have given me fucking a drug. Because what I did,

and we talked, you were looking at my bookshelf before, and I never bought into, like, psychics per se, but I was interested in, like, the people who claim that a random number generator could be influenced by someone, like, thinking. Like, I was trying to look for some kind of very tangible proof, looking at near-death experiences and all these things.

And then I immediately got into skeptics like Richard Dawkins and all these types that showed how that was all kind of nonsense. And you even said, you saw a book about psychics on here and you made a comment about how it's- If I may, I'll do my bit for the, uh, please do for the audience. I'll react like it's the first time. Absolutely. So the

book is called secrets of the psychics. And I opened it up and said, uh, Oh, we're making it up. And then I closed the book. So, uh, and I was doing, I wanted to write, cause there was this, I was so fast. I was so into like, uh, these magicians who would, um, bring back the dead. And they would in fact, like, you know, wear cheesecloth was the thing because it could be translucent. And you could smush cheesecloth so they would fit it into their mouth or their asshole. And there was this camp. I love this. So you know the woman who came up with the six stages of grief where it's like denial?

Five, I believe. Five, yeah. And so she was this famous— Kubler-Ross. Kubler- Kubler Ross. So later in her life, she totally hook, line and sinker bought into this phony psychic. Now there is six.

Yeah. Acceptance and return. Yeah. And this guy, he, a lot of widows would go there and he would claim to bring back their deceased husbands. And it would in fact be him dressed in cheesecloth and he would fuck them. They'd have sex with the ghost of their husband.

And the people didn't find it out until an STD started spreading around the camp. He was giving them all, or maybe not, he gave them all crabs. He gave them all something and they kind of put the dots together. But Kubler-Ross to her dying day

said, no, this guy's the real deal. I'm confused. Wait, there is something funny about everyone wanted to fuck their dead husband do you know yeah well you don't go to a camp if you don't miss the to bring them back no but i i like imagining that they're brought back and you're and then you're like man now we fuck like there is i could see some people being like well they're died i'm like it's just a funny thing that you would immediately fuck them sure yeah they're died i'm like it's just a funny thing that you would immediately fuck them they're not like let's go out get dinner let's go for a walk finally get that dick out i miss that let's hear about the afterworld what's it like over there yeah yeah yeah just like

immediately straight into fucking have you learned any new tricks there's also part of me like to really buy into that i'm like maybe these are people that were conflicted about having sex again now that their husband was dead and this was all a ruse to just let them get some dick and not feel guilty about it there's a lot going on here yeah but so you're you're you're like a skeptical guy too i mean i'm a guy i feel like i don't even want to say that i i wrote this joke a long time ago uh about how like i don't like labels you know like i would i would call myself a non-labeler that's how i would label myself and uh that's great and thank you and the end good night everybody um to answer to your questions um i certainly i a joke that i tell now is that i said i used to be i used to be an atheist and now i'm like, do we have to talk about it? You know, but sincerely, like I, like

none of us, like all of us only, as far as I know, I can only speak for what I know. I have like the, my conscious experience, you know, I have my memories. I have, you know, what I'm, what I'm looking at. I can, you know, I can see and hear and smell and taste and touch things. Like I can listen to other people's experiences. My friend Gus puts it like, when we're looking at other people, it's all airplanes, but from inside our own self, it's a cockpit.

So we only know, we know ourselves as a cockpit, and we're like, I assume everybody else is looking out of a cockpit as well that maybe works similarly in some ways, but we have truly, the sort of philosophy 101, like does red look the same to you as it does to me like yeah that kind of thing which i think still think is a good sometimes that's joked about like i understand like the stoner philosophy question but i'm still

like it's it's still a very uh it's a core of kind of the whole fucking shebang i mean it's a it is definitely to me it's like uh a question that has been asked and in this lifetime cannot be answered. Yes. And as such, it's sort of like, are we living in a simulation? Are we not living in a simulation? Either way, you have to do your laundry. You know, like either I want to have clean laundry in real life or I want to I want my simulated laundry to be clean.

You know, I want me simulated me to have simulated clean laundry. Like, great, great question. But don't let it be like, hey, you know, don't let it stop you from live it. Like, what a cool like I got I got a VR and I got a Oculus virtual reality headset. Really enjoy it. And one of the first things that I like you're you have hands in that you can see your hands like you're holding a controller, but it acts looks like hands. Yeah. And I'm like, wow, look what I can do with my hands. And then like next time I was in the bathroom, like show I'm like, wow, look what I can do with my hands.

And then like next time I was in the bathroom, like showering, I'm like, look what I can do with my hands. Like this is cool. This can do more. I can do more with my regular hand than I can with my virtual hand, like my actual hand. That's like people love the Matrix so much because it was one of those like movies that was watchable,

but everyone for the first time in their life was like but what if oh yeah i mean yeah but but what if though how would we know though cool movie great question and i really do feel like i mean there's do you know ramdas are you familiar i am i am a spiritual uh writer thinker teacher which i always feel let me just say i just immediately when i hear spiritual writer i'm always like all right we're gonna find out in a couple years that they you know fucked a kid or they like you know immediately when i hear spiritual writer, I'm always like, all right, we're going to find out in a couple of years that they, you know, fucked a kid or they like, you know, immediately when I hear spiritual teacher, I go corrupt, broken. Gary Shandling, the documentary about him, you know, he's talking to the like the guru guy over Zoom or whatever. And I'm like, yeah, because Gary Shandling is a celebrity and it probably helps this guy's fucking book sales that his clients are fucking Gary Shandling or Pete Holmes will have someone will have someone on his podcast or like fucking what's deepak chopra like okay well go ahead we're

getting negative i was like that's that's my initial the moment i hear this word like spiritual person i'm just like scam real spiritual people live it live alone on a farm and you don't hear about them but go ahead man there could be so many of them. There could be. Wow, everyone. A lot of people live on farms. What a wonderful thing to think about. Ram Dass. Ooh, now what were we talking about that led me to this?

Hands, Oculus. Oh, yeah, yeah. He says, you ever have this experience? I'm paraphrasing. He's like, an experience where you wake up, you're in a dream, and you don't know that you're in a dream, and it seems very realistic. And then you wake up from it, and you're like, oh, wow, I can't believe that that was a dream.

It seems so real. But once you're awake, you're like, oh, man. And he's like, now just wait until you wake up from this one. And it's just, I feel like a useful, a new kind of mind- like, I, I'm not claiming to have any knowledge about what happens after now. I hardly even necessarily have knowledge about what's happening before now or right now, but like, if we can know anything, we can know our own experiences, our own, uh, sensory, like, you know, basically I know things now I've experienced things now that 10 years ago, I hadn't that 20 years ago, I hadn't like, you know basically i know things now i've experienced things now that 10 years ago i hadn't

that 20 years ago i hadn't like you know ourselves yourself as a child uh is different than yourself now you've learned things like it it always feels like in the moment for me i'm like oh yeah like this is it you know but i know that whenever i felt like this is it like that wasn't it there was more there's always things that so far I don't know that like there's things that I know now that at one point were things that I didn't know and there's those are until you know literally everything which you know the Buddha the Buddha is purported to be omniscient by at least some Buddhists if not all of them but it's so until so until you're a divinely enlightened, omniscient, all-knowing Buddha consciousness,

which is most people aren't. Most people that I know. Sure, sure. And most people are ordinary beings. And so for us, there's always almost infinitely more to learn to know to experience and so I I had I hadn't I didn't smoke pot until I was like in my 20s oh yeah uh and uh I was dating a woman who I would marry uh and at that somewhere around there she was she was a musician uh and an artist a comedian as well a little bit and she was like pot helps me with my creativity. Like, she's like, I feel like I'm

in a different, uh, state, whatever it was. And she's like, maybe it could help you. And I was like, to me, I remember being like, I'm fine. Like I feel good with the creativity that I have. In fact, like people, I often make jokes still to this day that people are like, were you high when you came up with that? No, when I'm high, I lay down. You know what I mean? Like I come up with creative ideas when I'm not high on pot. Sometimes when I'm on mushrooms or sometimes with ayahuasca or different psychedel know, like can be therapeutic, can be creatively, you know, unleashing. And so I didn't do any, I remember not wanting to smoke pot for several reasons, including like, what if I have kids and I want to tell them that I never did it? And so I can be like, you don't do it because I didn't do it. And then. That was in your head, that advanced thinking.

A hundred percent. See, my dad just lied. Like my dad was like a hippie and he was like very much like don't do drugs. And like at some point, because my parents are divorced, my mom would be like, your dad like totally threw him under the bus. Yeah. That he was doing all sorts of crazy shit. Well, and I mean, at this point, I like I don't think I don't require don't advocate

that everyone does every experience that I've had. But I'm like, when I, especially when I've like gotten newly, like, you know, after I did ayahuasca for the first time and found immense value from it. Or when I did mushrooms for the first time in my 20s and had found immense value from it. I was like, do people know about this like let me ask you russell would you do you see at any point in your life like maybe let's say you have uh you're gonna die you know you're gonna die in the next year like can you see any scenario that you would try any of these drugs maybe uh. I don't do, I don't smoke pot really.

I'll do it once or twice or three times a year. Yeah, yeah. But I'm not like, no. Do you know what I mean? I think I would need the right setting. Tova wants me to do shrooms

really bad. And I get scared. I had a friend in college. I'm not I get scared. I had a friend in college. I'm not scared of it. I had a friend in college who did shrooms. And I'm sure he was depressed from many other things. Like this is not someone who's just like happy-go-lucky. But it seemed like the shrooms were a turning point for him into a darker, deeper depression.

And I'm not necessarily worried about that. I have a lot of things in place and therapy and whatnot. It's more like when I get high, I know when I've gotten truly high because i go through at one point i go like i think about death i think about like dying a violent death or like the pain or if i'm in a car i think about like what if this car just crashes and then i go through and then i'm gone like and and that happens to me every time i get stoned and it's very uh upsetting i don't like it and i'm like shrooms to me, anything that lasts longer than two hours or anything that's extended,

I'm like, what if I go into that place? It won't be fun for me. Well, let me offer you many pieces of advice and reaction to that. Number one, stop getting high in cars. Don't get high if you get in a car. I wasn't driving, by the way, just so we all know. I can't drive sober.

I would say pot, it's so interesting just so we all know. I can't drive sober. I mean, I would say like pot. I mean, it's so interesting because like people, you know, do it socially. For me, it took years to learn like that smoking pot at a party is not conducive to me enjoying the party. But like eating an edible at home alone or just with one other friend and like it being okay to lie down. Just like, you know, just listen to like you know just listen to music like not have to talk not have to engage to me like that's what pot and mushrooms are totally different to me in that like pot like zones me out and sort of makes me like passive and it's like relaxing uh and that's why like doing it at a party like didn't make sense i would just like fall asleep

at parties which i sometimes do anyway even i'm not on the pot but mushrooms are like a different kind it's a it's a completely different kind of experience yeah uh i'm not saying that you're you know what happened to your friend clearly happened to your friend who knows what would have happened without the mushroom because there's research demonstrating these days that like psilocybin is like effective at treating depression like that six months to a year after one like therapeutic psilocybin is like effective at treating depression. Like that six months to a year after one like therapeutic psilocybin mushroom session, like people are like continuing to see the benefits of that. So again, I mean, like I'm not, I don't want to. Have you ever had a bad trip?

Do you have a bad, tell me about a bad trip. Sure. Let's do that. Okay. So I think one of the reasons that I did it so i i think one of the reasons that i did it which here's one of the reasons that i had it is that i didn't have the ideal set and setting which is that's the thing is if you were to do mushrooms for the first time i would like here's optimum optimizing it is like you'll either be somewhere in nature or somewhere that's comfortable to you

like it feels like comfortable nature to me feels like bugs and i see a bear okay i mean like i'm talking like the park you know okay yeah like you know a nearby park i mean like a bear like you know like a big yeah a gay man yeah uh i understand so uh or let's say you know a comfortable uh apartment a comfortable like somewhere like you're with your girlfriend who has positive experiences with this experience already. And then can thus be there to, you know, comfort you. Does she need to be sober? No, she does not need to be.

Like I've definitely, I remember my cousin of mine and a good friend of mine and I did, we're in LA years ago, did mushrooms all together. My cousin was like, I like need not that much of it because it like makes me something. And it felt like we were like a little family where my, my, my friend and I were like the parents and my cousin was like running around and we're like, Oh, and he like, eventually like, like we were like, everything's okay. You know? Like, so if you have, you know, somebody who cares about you and knows what they're doing with respect to like having experienced psychedelics before, like, I think you'll be like also like a bad trip. So I'll tell you what the bad that so here's what made it bad, I think, is I didn't eat anything really in the morning because in part I was like, oh, I wanted to like if I if I eat too much, then maybe it will like negatively impact. Maybe it won't have as strong an effect. I see. Uh, that was what I was thinking at the time. But so whatever it is, I did it kind of on an empty

stomach. Uh, and I was, I went out walking through Boston. I walked along the river, uh, near where I lived. And then I like started walking back through, I don't know if you know, Boston, like Newberry street. Uh, I was like singing to myself. Like I think about Reggie Watts a lot when I'm on Mushrooms. I'm like, I wonder if this is what he's like all the time. You know, I'm just like, yeah, I think I'm doing it. I'm him, you know. And I remember I got what I think of now was like tired, hot and hungry. But like my body wasn't able to interpret those messages.

So it kind of I was like, oh, God sit down i feel weak i feel am i dying am i dead is this all a hallucination like and so then i just sat on this uh on the sidewalk uh like sort of you know in this side street and people were walking by me with like dogs because it was a nice day and people were walking their dogs but i'm'm like, is it symbolic? Is somebody like searching for me like with a rescue dog? Am I am I? I'd seen this episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I don't know if you're familiar.

I know the show. There's an episode where she in the world of the show gets like infected with a demon's like blood or something that makes her hallucinate. But her hallucination, it takes the form of her being in the quote unquote real world where she's not a vampire slayer. And she's like in a mental institution. And and that the her hallucination in the world of the show is that in this world, her life as the vampire slayer that we've known for six seasons is a hallucination. I see. And her parents are saying things to her like,

what's more likely, that you're a vampire slayer, the one person chosen to defend the universe from all evil, or that you're a girl who had a mental break? Uh-huh. Yeah. And, I mean, it's an amazing episode. And I honestly, this was 2008. I had, it was, it must have been between March and June because I had taped my very first

TV appearance, Live at Gotham, in March. And it was to air in June. And I remember thinking, like, what's more likely, that I'm going to be on TV for the first time or that I'm like an 88-year-old senile man who got lost out in Boston? I also think it's funny that it's like, what's more likely that I made it to Gotham Live that's going to air on AXS TV

for people who have the most expensive cable plan, channel 1,354? And you just sat with it. Just to be clear, I don't mean I'm going to do this as a bit, but also sincerely. This was Comedy Central's Live at Gotham. Oh, it used to be on Comedy Central. They are completely different shows.

I see. Oh, now it's Gotham Live. Yeah, in that, I mean, they are both shows that were stand-up comedy, live at Gotham, but one of them was on Comedy Central called Live at Gotham. And I think of the one currently on the AXS channel, which is one of those where like,

you might as well see it on YouTube. Yeah. So just to be clear, which I think I've done that as well. And I'm very grateful for all the opportunities I've done to be on all of the screens. Listen, I would love to do Live at Gotham. I've been brought up,

whenever people don't know your credits, that's like just one of their go-tos. You've seen this guy live at Gotham. I've been brought up whenever people don't know your credits, they that's like just one of their go-tos. You've seen this guy live at Gotham. I'm like, not yet. And, uh, and so,

yeah, but this at the time was the biggest deal at all. Like I'd never done anything. And so I sincerely like, you know, part of the trip was me being like, what if I am just like, I don't,

I was like, I do remember like getting up this morning and eating these mushrooms, but I'm like, and I've eaten mushrooms before, but what if this is the time that is actually real? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And here's a valuable lesson that I learned from the ayahuasca guide who guides the ceremonies of ayahuasca that I go to. He'll sometimes say in advance, he'll say, remember, the effects come and the effects go. And that's something that's true of psychedelic experiences. That's something that's been true so far of every emotion that I've ever had.

Like every emotion that you've like, remember what's the, what's the thing that made you feel the worst exactly one year ago? Who knows? You're not experiencing that now. You remember David at the dentist, that classic video where he wakes with anesthesia he has that line where he goes is this forever and it's so true that there's moments and it happens to me when i'm stoned too if i get too stoned it's been a while so i've been like way too stoned and it's like what if like this is forever and then i have to kill myself because i can't i always go to like I'll have to kill myself how will I do it I mean good news is uh you can so far yeah that's not gonna be my way out of it I mean here's I had this here's an analogy uh I remember in um in college I was a philosophy major and I remember having this kind of around the same times, like is red the same? Uh, I remember thinking like, am I a brain in a vat? Is it

possible? It's possible that I'm the only, this is the only cockpit that I know of. Am I the only person that exists? Is everything else around me? And I was like, here's the thing that I realized. I was like, well, either other people exist, other minds exist, other consciousnesses exist outside of just mine, or I'm the only one, and either way is pretty cool. I remember in middle school when I had my first existential crisis, I was asking my friends, what do you think happens when you die? And there's this guy named Zach, and he was like, I think I'm the only one that exists, and when I die, everything disappears. And I was like, fuck, fuck, we got to get you. There's no more riding bikes for you.

Like, you need to go home and we need to take care. Like, I had this thought, like, oh, my God, what if he's right? And when he dies, I disappear. And it's just the kind of person I am. I don't think he's right. And you would have been like, hmm, that's interesting. Wow. I would have been like, so fascinating.

What a fool both of you are. Do you know what? I used to, when I was young, I told my brother. I was so mean. I told him that he was a robot that we plugged in. And all of his memories of us going on vacations and stuff were just memories, things that we put into the computer. We were just making everything up and really

he's just plugged in in a room. Which is a crazy thing and very mean to do. And I've apologized since for it. But also pretty creative for a kid, I think, too. Because I do think I've always thought of the existential...

Like, four years. Did he really get fucked up from was he like no i'm not no he'd get really mad and and you know have you told him the truth so far or is that you're listening to the podcast i've apologized i've you know um but it was mainly about like i would always be like it would i would always use it around disney world i'd be like you're not actually going to disney world you are plugged in and we're I'd be like, you're not actually going to Disney World. You are plugged in and we're just programming your memories that you're having in Disney. And that's the main time I used it was like when we did trips to Disney. Because you didn't want him to enjoy the trip?

I don't know. This is like a dark side of you that I've never seen you do now. No, no. As an adult, it's one of those things that immediately, even when in high school, I was like, God, that was fucked up. I should not have done that.

I mean, it's how you were programmed to do it. Of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did the, like my brother and I, we would rough house and then ultimately, I'd end up giving him like a five star

and then he'd start crying. And like, that was the bad thing I'd do with my brother. And then my stepdad would come in and he'd be like what's going on here i'd be like he was attacking me just stuff you do to your siblings oh yeah i don't have that good uh you don't have a do you think do you think that is partly why you are like the way that you are no i don't think it's anything to do it uh yeah yeah i do And here's two things about what you just said. Number one, previously, there's a spiritual book called A Course in Miracles that my girlfriend was familiar with before I knew her and she introduced me to. One of the things in it that I really like,

there's a lot of stuff in it that I like, but one of the things that's relevant now is the idea that everyone alive right now and forever, we are thoughts in the mind of God. And I like that this kid, he's like, yeah, you're all thoughts in the mind of Zach. And the analogy, I feel like the thing that terrified you, which I also, I used to be terrified of death, of not existing, of the idea of infinity, eternity, like not being able to

understand i would like spiral out into it for thankfully a finite amount of time because that's the only amount of time that you can spiral out but the the thing from earlier when you're like like what if is this forever and so either here's the two positive flip sides of it either it's not uh and certainly the fact that every time you've ever thought is this forever it wasn't so far uh is this forever no it likely isn't or if it is forever then you're immortal that seems pretty good too i true it's so funny you're oh i'm still have those fears that's why i'm so interested in taking ayahuasca like i and it's it's so much better like there was just a time and i i had a i in college who, like, bore the brunt of, like, my existential, like, trauma.

And, like, I should have been in therapy or I should have been taking LSD or I should have been doing something. But instead, I kind of, like, I leaned on her for, like, proof. Like, I would ask, she would, like, get quotes. That was the thing. Like, she would, like, get quotes of some philosopher or some scientist that would give me brief comfort before i would read you know richard dawkins say oh that guy's a fucking idiot and then i'd be back to square like infinity of nothingness so i just want to follow in your footsteps i i mean i'd say starting with mushrooms uh seems very reasonable again you don't have to and it's all up to you you. It can be a valuable tool.

But I'll offer this as well. You don't have to do a full dose the first time immediately because you don't know anything about what it's like. If you want, there's micro doses that barely even are perceptible and might even be just the placebo effect. Sure. But whatever the dose is, if it's, you know, however many grams,

divide it in two, divide it in three, like, take a little bit and see what that does for you, you know, an hour later. I would do it as a Patreon episode. Yeah.

Oh, my God. And do you have sex on mushrooms? I can't say for sure. It's certainly not what I generally do. Do you remember that thing when I was a kid? They'd be like, don't ever have sex on ecstasy because then it's so good that regular sex sucks. He'd be like, whoa, okay, good.

I'm not having sex or taking ecstasy right now, but thanks for those warnings in case that should ever arise in my life. I think I have had sex on ecstasy or molly once or twice and uh i'm just here to report that sex is still good good good good yeah totally fine i really want to i just want to touch i mean it's not gonna be but i also the downside you talk you're you're vegan i am correct and uh look how long i went without telling you and only because you asked i i admire it so much i recently i did this podcast zach amico's podcast where you watch like a horror movie or something and it was called the faces of death and there was just like there was some animal stuff and i recently i was in the subway and there's this group called anonymous for the voiceless

out of your friends with them all but they they wear Guy Fawkes anonymous masks, and they're holding up TVs of like animals, you know, horrible animal conditions. And I ended up like standing there for like 10 minutes just watching. And, you know, they saw me. They're like, we got him. You know, like I'm a fish. I'm a fish with a hook.

In a way, they're doing it to me. And they came over. They gave me the card. And, you know, I was inspired from then on whenever I go out to bring a remote with me so if I ever see it I can turn it off next time but I told Tova

I watched this documentary I saw this horrible treatment and in my resolution I was like I'm going to eat more tofu for lunch I had a tofu sandwich and then for dinner that night I had fucking chicken again and I tell me the downside of being vegan well here's uh thanks for asking um I'll say this to begin with in general uh I like to it's not that I don't like to talk about negative things I mean I think that it's important to when there are like things in the world that are painful and

challenging like it's important to acknowledge them are like things in the world that are painful and challenging, like it's important to acknowledge them and sometimes acknowledging them and is like a step towards helping them not be like that anymore. We're going to get to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict after this. Pretty soon. Had a big conversation about it yesterday with my cousin. And so I like to, the way that I like to frame this is I like to talk about like, whether in my comedy or my life in general, like the like small good things and big bad things. Like, because I feel like if I talk about big good things, I feel like people are like, Hey, don't throw that in my face, you know, but like small good things, like hopefully most people have like some experience

of like, you know, a small good thing. So we can all connect on those. And then as opposed to like, I don't want to complain about small bad things because like, I feel like there's so many people that have, you know, a broken leg and I'm complaining about a stubbed toe, but I'm like the big, the big systemic things, your various racism, sexisms, like animal suffering. And so I feel like, like now you're like this girl that I dated where the, from earlier where you're like, okay, but what's one? I'm like, I haven't even told you all the good things about veganism yet. Well, but I, so I come into it just going like, I think very deeply that eating meat when we have the capability to not is easily show, easily morally bad.

It's not good. Suffering's bad. These these animals they feel this is all bad so i i think being vegan is great i think someday i think someday when human beings have created uh fake meat that tastes just as good as regular meat which will happen eventually that they will look back on us who ate meat and as one of the things of like they were fucking oh your great-grandfather i'm not equating it to the exact same thing of your oh you're you like have a poster of uh uh you know uh some some celebrity you liked or some figure you know he ate meat and i think like once human beings no longer even have the temptation to eat meat that they will they will judge it as like a vile thing uh and i don't

think they're wrong. I think they're hypocritical because they'll have good fake meat, but I think it's bad. So that's why I want to hear, because I may go vegan someday, or I may like, you know, toy with it, or eat less meat, which sometimes I do that thing where I'm like, well, if it's less, it's still just as shitty. So just fuck it.

I won't do anything. I mean, certainly like doing something a little is different than not doing it. Yes. And like over the course, you know, it's like, ah, what? My vote doesn't have any. So why even vote at all? And then everything, like every person in your position who's like, I wish I could, but I can't do everything.

So why should I even bother doing something? I might as well do nothing. could, but I can't do everything. So why should I even bother doing something? I might as well do nothing. Something is, I think, always a step in the direction you want to go. One of the lies I tell in my head, I say, when I'm rich or when I have money, when I can have meals delivered from vegan restaurants or a personal chef or something in my head, I'm like, when I can do that, I'll be vegan. And I'm like joe marco that's an insane i think a lot of people have morality based on like well when it's easy that's when i'll do it yeah we had a slight technical issue here um by the way uh douglas goodhart i think he listens uh he's the guy who made all the wonderful music. I really could use a music that's like, that's like, technical issue.

You don't have to copy that template. But just please, I'll pay you this time. I've always, I want to make clear to everyone, I offered to pay him money for it. So Douglas, I'm willing. Not too much, obviously. By the way, please join the Patreon, patreon.com slash downside. Back to the episode.

My question is because I might think that what is the downsides of being vegan in a meat eating America? Okay well first I will answer your question but I also do want to say like this is a thing I've been thinking about recently as maybe a joke but also just like a real you know the philosophical concept of the trolley problem

uh-huh recently made famous in the good place a wonderful show uh the trolley problem uh for anyone who needs a a refresher like you're in control of uh a trolley is heading on one track and it's going to kill five people if you don't do anything but you can switch it to actively only kill one different person and it seems like morally like oh you should actively take the step to save four lives as opposed to you're like i'm not doing anything that's like utilitarian thinking yeah Yeah, exactly. And so the way I see veganism is that, you know, it's certainly it's like a trolley problem where like all of the animals like suffering or their lives are on one side of the track. Also, your own health and, you know, and like physical and emotional and potential like spiritual well-being. That's on the same side.

And also the planet, you know, all of the, everything's on one side and people are like, well, should we make it go to the track where the planet and animals and humans all get to continue to live and be healthy? Nah, I'm just gonna have it keep going right over our own bodies.

So, I mean, honestly, I don't mean to be an asshole and be like, there's only good things about being vegan. I mean, of course, you certainly you'll have to contend with assholes. Well, I don't necessarily mean the downside of veganism, but like to have to live as a vegan in a world where I go to restaurants all the time and there's not a vegan option. Are you sure? Well, have you asked?

When did you become vegan? Uh, 2002. Was it like that? That's a long time ago. That's like before. Yeah. Before.

Is it, I mean, sincerely, like all of these questions, like I'm happy to answer all of your questions about the imagined ills of the imagined difficulties, challenges of being vegan. Honestly, no challenges of being vegan.

Very rarely challenges. I mean, like one time difficulties, challenges of being vegan. You have no challenges of being vegan in America? Very rarely challenges. I mean, like one time in the mid-2000s, I was on a road trip with my friend Jason driving from the East Coast to where he lived in L.A. We were driving through the New Orleans area. We stopped and saw a friend. We went to a restaurant that I didn't select, and there was nothing specifically vegan on the menu. I was like, do you guys just have like this pasta? Can I just have vegetables and sauce without meat? They're like, the meat is in the sauce. And I was like, what about just vegetables? And they're like, we don't really even have those. And I found on the back, they have

pizza and they had pizza toppings. And I'm like, oh, you call your vegetables pizza toppings. So I'll have some of these onions, you know, peppers and mushrooms and like all there's so many vegetables listed, just not called or conceived of as vegetables. So that took a little like mental maneuvering at a restaurant that I didn't choose. But the point is, it is a different world today in in our country, in our city, in most cities. And also the fact that I forget there's a book that i didn't read that is about like how too many choices like we have so many choices and that is psychologically chat that is damaging like it is we are less happy to have like i think it's like three or four choices is good it's like if i go to a non-vegan restaurant and there's like three or four things i can i'm like wait i can get

one of these things that's actually easier to be vegan in some restaurants in America. It's actually hard to be not vegan. It's hard to be a meat eater, to be an omnivore and go into a restaurant that has pages of menu. You're wasting so much of your life trying to decide what to eat

and just be like i'll just have the vegan thing i agree with that i was with tova the other day and i said like i i would uh rather have a what is it called where you have three things prepared meals like i'd rather like i hate looking through the menu like i i i always do now i don't know if waiters hate this where i just go like what do people like here? And that's, I get it every time. But, I look at the menu ahead of time. Okay,

well, you've, you've, I mean, you're, you're not wrong. It's, I think,

I think it'd be really great. He's been doing it for 20 years, and he lives in New York City. Like, it's like, being like, how is it to put pants on today? I also do travel extensively.

Yeah, exactly, exactly. Like, how is it to put pants on? Is it, here's, no,

here's the real question. It's that like, when I'm emotionally feeling good, good or I'm feeling satisfied or I'm not starving, it's like fine. And then I could see like I would go to your friend and we go to the restaurant. I'm starving. I'm on the fucking road. And I would go, I'm so hungry. I want a meal. Fuck, I'm going to have pizza toppings on a plate and I'm going to mix it up and call it a salad and I'd be so hungry and angry. Do you see meat and you don't even have the desire anymore? No, I do not have the desire, but it's not, the desire is neither. Like, I mean, sometimes if I smell meat, like it doesn't, like, it intellectually revolts me, but it doesn't like automatically viscerally. Like I know there are people for whom they're like, just, it has an instinctual reaction. Like I know that this is the flesh of an animal and I don't like that. And I don't like that.

I don't like that it happens, but it is for me much more uh like i'm like this is i've i have shifted this is one category that i will gladly assign myself though also somebody asked me recently they're like when there is like meat that's made in a lab that is you know that involves no animal suffering at all and is near identical or completely identical to the meat that you could get in the past from animals, like, is that technically vegan? And I'm like, that doesn't even specifically matter to me. I'm like, if there are people like you who will eat, you know, suffering free meat as opposed to like, of course, I don't like, great. I'd rather there be less suffering in the world and the category of whether the food or the person is or is not vegan or vegetarian or plant-based or however you want to identify, I'm like,

is there less suffering? Great. Is there more happiness? Great. Is your girlfriend vegan? Yeah. Could you ever be with a non-vegan? Yeah, I have been.

And I remember reading like uh an ask vegan like advice column at one point and somebody was like uh should i try to only date vegans and honestly uh the answer was like no if you're i mean utilitarian wise if you're dating somebody who wouldn't be vegan but like is willing to go to restaurants with you is willing to try it there actually will be more good done in the world. There will be less animal suffering. So vegans like fan out, spread out, you know, like don't just date each other. You know, one less chicken nugget order. That's one chicken that would be very grateful. Exactly. If it could express it. Well, I'm going to go vegan after this. Would you ever?

well, I'm going to go vegan after this. Would you ever? Uh, I would try it. Um, here's the thing. What's tough about this is that whenever I hear and talk about it, I'm like,

I fully 100% agree. Um, and I feel really bad and I got a solution for you. I know. I know. And that's the thing. You're like, you could just do it.

Just do it. Do you want to, do you want to hear it? can i do a brief impression for you yeah i mean to interrupt i do mean i do mean to please but this is i i came up with this impression pretty recently i don't know if i'm going to do it on stage but uh it's uh it's my impression of like the the only because so many people are like you so many people are exactly this is my impression of non-vegans with like the only argument that i haven't been able to counter like i can counter almost any argument the only vegan non-vegan the only anti-vegan argument that i can counter is that i don't wanna i don't like vegetables i'm like a baby that's gonna endear the audience

to you yeah i'm like i don't want that to be an impression of you i wanted to i want that to be an impression of you. I want that to be an impression of no one. So just join us. We are silent. We are utterly silent. I think because I know that I won't do it. And I don't know how to wrap my head around it in a way. I'm definitely up for reducing. Yeah, I believe. I believe in you both.

I believe strongly. We should try. We should do a. Have a meal. We should do one meal. Like a week. We could do a thing. We should do one, have a meal. We should do one meal like a week. We can do it. We should do one Patreon episode where we don't need any meat for the whole

episode. No, no, no. Like we do like if we commit to like doing it for a full week and just to see what that is like. I like that. Do you know when we can talk about it?

Okay. I think that's great. And I love it. I thank you. And I also just want to add this post disclaimer that if you rewind this episode, you'll find that I didn't bring this up and I only answered questions. I have it on my paper. If any of these cameras are still working, it says vegan on it. Because you're right.

You're right. It was this video I saw. It was the chicken's head. It's the chicken chickens body flapping around without the head you don't for a while and it's like oh man I know this is bad you know no there's a here's another an analogy I hadn't really thought of when I was like 21 I had a girlfriend and I uh while I was away at summer camp I uh, uh, made out with another girl and, uh, I'd become friends with a girl and I, I'd sort of, you know, was, uh, maneuvering it in my head to be like, look,

I can tell my girlfriend that I have this friend, this, you know, it's totally fine to have a friend. You're allowed to have a friend. And like, ultimately, like, you know, when that line was crossed, like I ultimately like told my girlfriend the truth, but I was like, I guess I thought the thought the lesson initially was like well if you hadn't told her the truth then you would potentially still be with your girlfriend so the lesson is don't tell the truth but like later uh so she hadn't learned everything like we'd broken up but then later when we were almost getting back together she was asking me she's like did what happened did anything happen like because earlier i had told her i had told her everything was the truth but she was like still suspicious and jealous yeah and we broke up but so then i was like oh if i didn't tell her any of that then everything would

have been fine but then i did like you know hook up with this person and then when my girlfriend was like so did anything happen because i feel she like, I feel like I was unfair earlier. I judged you like with that. I, you didn't, you said that you didn't do anything. I believe you. I trust you. Did any, so sincerely, did anything happen? And I, in my head, I, at first I was like, the lesson was don't tell the truth. And, but I was like, I can't do it.

So I told, I was like, yes, something did happen. And we broke up and we remained friends after that. We're friends again. But so the lesson was not ultimately don't tell the truth. If the truth is something that will hurt somebody is try to have the truth be something that when you tell it won't hurt somebody. are at in in your vegan journey you're about to take take a step uh and the place that you're at is like i don't like like i don't want to know these horrible things like these horrible things exist that in ways i'm potentially contributing to like i don't want to think that about myself i don't want it to be about the world and so some people like just won't watch those movies some people just you know don't want to like i don't want to know the thing but really the thing is i don't want the thing to be so yeah but but if you're like america exactly um uh that's so funny about camp i feel like going to summer camp and having girlfriends and whatnot you like learn lessons about like fidelity and temptation in a way that some people

find out in their 40s and 50s and the consequences are much graver people need to go to summer camp psychedelics veganism that's all you need there you go all right so let's let's go to our our this has got to stop this has got to stop I this might have been tough for you I mean other than eating meat oh i got one go for it uh when people honk their horn immediately after the light changes from considerably farther back in the the line of cars to the point where they can't know if there's still like a child or an old person or anybody like still crossing such that like there should be a system where look if

everybody has like one second you know the first car if you don't move like a second's kind of a long time you should be paying attention uh-huh you have a second to start moving maybe even two seconds let's say one second and if that car doesn't move after one second the car right behind it can be like beep just like a quick a quick beep, don't know if you saw it. Beep. Like, and then if, if after two seconds, that car hasn't done that, then the third car could be like beep, you know, just, and then after whatever car length you are, that's how many seconds you have to wait before honking. But people do not follow. This is, here's the thing. The way that I talk about this on stage sometimes sometimes and just in my, in my life in general is the concept of pet peeves. I don't like to think of myself as having pet peeves because if I were to

allow myself to have a pet peeve or pet peeves, I'm like one of my pet peeves would be having pet peeves, myself having pet peeves. And so this is sort of like the penance that I give myself to do for the concept of being like, but I do want to express this thing that I think is negative, that is challenging, that a friend of mine and I, we call it rum process the problem, helps you work through the problem. Honking bothers me. And so it's important for me to be like, but it's funny if I don't keep a lid on it, I'll be like, honking sucks. Honk, honk. I don't like honking. I don't like when people, and I become the very honking that I'm upset at in the world. And so I, I'm very gingerly with how I present when things bother me. And so honking horns would, if I had a pet peeve, then honking horns unnecessarily in volume, in length, and in near chronological proximity to when it ought happen. Yeah, I'd say.

when it ought happen. Yeah, I'd say. We definitely, I think we need two different kinds of horns because you have this one device for get out of the way! And like, hey. And that's tough. I truly believe it ought be like phone rings.

Like you can have your favorite song be it, but yeah, just have different settings for different people. Like your mom calls, it goes with one ring. Your love calls, your romantic love calls, it goes with another ring. You need a... Yeah. Yeah.

That would be a great horn. Sure. I'm sure. Unfortunately, Elon Musk will be the one to do it. And it will be a Tesla feature. Well, let's get to the one brief moment of positivity in this very positive episode of The Downside. You better count your blessing. You better count your blessing.

I'll go first. I think it's nice to end with the guest. I think that's a nice thing that we do. This is a very specific one, but I just watched another one of those videos that I love. Russell made a very cruel joke about it. I was going to do the, this has got to stop. These glasses. Oh, we'll do. Our episodes have been going longer, so we usually do this has got to stops.

But I just had to talk about veganism because I just had to feel that shame. I see. Because in a way, if I feel that shame, that absolves me from doing the bad thing in the first place. Yeah, yeah. I know I feel bad for it so it's okay um it's those videos i love watching these videos of uh someone who is colorblind and they give them these glasses and they see color and it's it's almost like the emotions are always the same it's like three seconds of like whoa and then they take off the glasses and cry and it's just a beautiful beautiful beautiful thing and uh russell let me

know that the glasses looked very silly though they look like they look like those like cheap like shades they gotta design them better because i think we have the technology so i'm just saying you're giving this amazing thing to someone to have and i think we could design them better because i think we have the technology so i'm just saying you're giving this amazing thing to someone to have and i think we could design them better that's all yeah they know they don't look like you're like going to a 3d movie they look you know it looked like uh like a middle like a midlife crisis dad like seeming cool i'm this 13 year old kid yeah um so uh that that's my blessing is those videos and those doctors who make it happen that's lovely um there's a great sketch out there uh i forget their name but where they they they get the glasses and they're like oh so so no xbox ha i kind of said that and

they're just really disappointed in these life-altering glasses russell um mine's kind of a general one but I'm very thankful my parents they my dog died this week and they well this is coming out in a bit so my dog died weeks ago so it's time to be moving on I'm fine

so my dog died a long time ago and when he did die my parents were like we we're going to come see you. And I haven't really seen them in a while, you know. Why? Long time, years ago, we had this thing called COVID. I don't know when this is coming out. But so they're coming tonight.

So I'm going to get to see them. And I'm thankful for that. It's very sweet of them. And Mike. And I'm thankful for that. It's very, very fun. And Mike. Well, I'm very grateful to have been asked to be here to have this bountiful, abundant, wonderful conversation.

Sincerely. And I'll say specifically, I really like all the little theme songs throughout. Thank you. This mechanism is so beautiful, like rainbow colored, like pastel. I mean, it's like, as I a, I'm, as I've said, like I'm not necessarily like a looker at things,

but I can't help but be like impressed by like the, the visual physicality of this device that is also, of course, functional in the ways I also, I love, like I'm a musician since childhood, since like age four, my parents were musicians, music teachers, and started playing the violin, started writing songs when I was like 15 in high school. And I love still, like I play music for fun.

I record music. My girlfriend was away for the past two weeks. So it's also a great joy that she returned yesterday. I'm very happy that she is home again. And so happy to be here today, not with her. And love her. she was still asleep didn't get a lot of sleep on her vacation but uh she while every day that she was gone she was gone i think 13 days and i like recorded a short song for her or because of her or you know just uh each

day called my girlfriend's way day one through thirteen and uh might release them at some point but like share them with some friends enjoy doing them I just like I like doing that and so I've done it for like uh one of my podcasts uh not the one that you were on uh because that's one that has guests but the one that doesn't have guests called The Faucet and I like I've recorded both of the theme songs for both of the podcasts and I have a new segment on uh my The Faucet podcast where because I'm doing them sort of like uh some people are watching live and couldn't put comments or questions in like the mechanism by which they're watching and i will like sometime later in the episode like look back at the comments and uh

not necessarily know what people are talking about because they left it 20 minutes earlier and so i created a segment called out of context comments and i and i made a theme song for it and i've i just i love tiny like bite-sized musical nuggets i love making them i love hearing them and so that's something that i'm grateful for i should have known you'd have eight blessings for this single blessing just like music that love music um and anything you i mean we plugged your podcast check them both out say their name again for people broccoli and ice cream is the one that you were on if you want to you know sort of a gateway episode if you like listening to John Marco and he's there too he'll be comfortable so yeah broccoli and ice

cream and the faucet is the one that is just me it's like it's like this but without you guys and that they each come out, you know, at least once a week, sometimes more. And I have a Patreon for it. So the Broccoli and Ice Cream is called that because it's about the work of people's lives that I talked to them about and the joys of people's lives.

And so each half of the conversation, one is usually focused on one, one is focused on the other. We were going to call this podcast Just Broccoli. That makes sense. Yeah. I like it.

And that'd be funny if somebody liked my podcast, but they're like, I just did that. It's kind of like when I listen to Pete Holmes when he gets into the religious stuff.

I'm like, all right, I listened to the episode. That's great. That's hilarious. That's why you do segments so people can drop out of the segments they don't like you know i was thinking earlier it'd be funny if you did do um uh shrooms and then we had to switch the whole podcast they like changed your whole thing and you're like you've got to turn it to the upside downside i'll be like okay let's do it you know and you'd be the negative one on the podcast you're like

all right chamarcoco, calm down. Can I just pitch my name? I did say it, but we were all having a good time. The Upside Downside. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Perfect. Because I'm still there. Yeah.

But sincerely, yes, the podcast is Broccoli and Ice Cream, and one episode comes out on Patreon, and the other one's free. And you did mention my album, my most recent album of several albums I have that are available. look, you're on the internet, you can find an album. It's called AKA and just Mike Kaplan is spelled weird. So if you look for that, M-Y-Q-K-A-P-L-A-N, that's where I am all over the internet, social media, and such. I do have a new, a fun, jokey newsletter. I send out a few jokes and some of my upcoming things and that's at mikecaplin.substack.

Fantastic. Russell, Uncle Function, our sketch team, will have something on the books. In July. In July, yeah. Well, we have a show

next week. I got to put that date in my calendar. Long ago in July. So check out Uncle Function. Me, this is coming out out i will be headlining the tiny cupboard tonight at 9 p.m uh gonna do i think it's i think i get a good 45 minutes gonna gonna do some do some bits and um yeah uh i think uh this was a very positive episode

and it's important to remember that whether you are vegan or not eventually you will be meat and probably eaten by the worms and the maggots goodbye everyone well this was fun I'm in the mood for a steak wait a second

so hot more like a mistake I'm in the mood for a steak. Wait a second. Oh, no. So hot. More like a mistake. Perfect.